GOOD
fnf C fnffD
In Florence, lately, one of spvernl
Italian In (lion who wont entertaining
Mark Twain, asked what was (In
American mi 1 lotm I game. "Poker," he
responded. When she laughingly pro
tested Hint he was facetious, he grnve
ly reiterated lit h Htntcnicnt , mid added:
"Madame, (o Iho game of poker llio
American people ov Iho moHt valuu
hln lesson n tuition en ii learn: Never
Rlvo up, oven after you have lost your
IiihI chance"
'A well-known nclor was tolling IiIh
3J-year-old won, whom ho considers
very iiiiniatui'o and young for IiIh ago.
that, ho ought, to ho doing something
for IiIh glory and IiIh country. "Why,
whon George Washington was your
ago, my son, he was surveying the es
tate, of Lord Fairfax." The hoy
thought a moment, then ho replied,
(Illicitly: "Well, when ho was as old
an you, pa, ho was President of the
United States."
"Snrdon represents a distinct type of
Iho dramn which ho originated," said a
pupil in Brundor .Matthew's dramatic
literature class at Columbia Univers
ity. "What description of that type
do you offer?" asked Professor Mat
IhowH. "Theatrical plays closely pack
ed with Interest mark the Sardine
drnnia," replied tho young man,
promptly nnd earnestly, "young man,"
laughed the professor, "with a can
opener you may yet ovolvo tho great
American play,"
"I am disgruntled," said Senator
Kostor recently; "I'll never give money
to a street heggar again as long as I
llvo. There was a very pltlful-looklug
heggnr in tho avenue, u few minutes
ago, and, my heart going out to lilin,
I Btopped to hand him a few small
coins I had some dllllculty, I admit,
In finding my change, hut was that
any reason for tho heggar to frown at
mo, and say, Impatiently: 'Hurry up,
sir. Pvo lost several customers while
you've heon muddling over them pen
nies' "
Professor E. G. Dexter, of the Uni
versity of Illinois, who has devoted
much time to proving that football Is
a harmless game, is very popular
among the students. He was enter
taining a group of them at his resi
dence one night, and during n space
of silence, he took down and bran
dished a niagnltlcent sword that hung
over the fireplace. "Never will I for
get," ho exclaimed, "the day I drew
this blade, for the first time" "Where
Slid you draw It, sir?" a freshman ask-
d, respectfully. "At a rafllo," said
Professor Dexter.
When Urlu. now admiral of tho
llnpanesc navy, entered the academy at
lAnnapolls, ho got a good old-fashioned
Inuring, like all the other fellows, and
Uoori it like a major. When he became
an upper class man and privileged to
haze the Incoming lledgllngs, he also
lived up to the academy traditions, lie
weighed only about 115 pounds, and
was ono of the smallest fellows in the
academy. "I remember," says one of
bis classmates, "seeing him get hold
of big George Ferguson, now an as
sistant engineer of the Brooklyn
Bridge 'What's your name?' demand
ed Urlu. 'Ferguson, sir.' 'Spell It.'
'F-o-r-g-u-s-o-n, sir.' 'Spell it over
again, ami remember that, you're ad
dressing your superior.' 'F, sir; e, sir;
r, sir; g, sir; u, sir; s, sir; o, sir; n, sir.
Ferguson, sir.' "
PLT A CAUSE OF CANCER.
Pup of till' Oleander Ih Suld to Produce
The Dreaded .Malady.
When I was a child a neighbor rode
o our door on horseback. W hile he
vus talking with my lather his horse
irowded close to the porch and at
l.miptod to bile some twigs of an olonn
tor. The man was greatly alarmed
vhon ho saw that the animal had
I Token a stalk, and asked for water
nil washed the horse's mouth thor
oughly. My father asked tho reason for his
Mixloty. Ho said a mouthful of tin
Iwigs would kill the horse almost in
stantly, and told of a horse that died
In severe tremors a few minutes after
eating a few shoots of tho plant; also
if n neighbor who pruned her oleander
plants and threw the branches into a
little pond In the barnyard. The cattle
drank the water and died.
Some years later a playmate was
under medical treatment for an en-
.largoment of tho throat which seemed
to threaten goiter. Her house was 'in
oleander bower and the blossoms were
her favorite decoration. Slip sometimes
bit the stems off If they were too long.
After months of the most thorough
treatment the swelling disappeared.
A young woman who was extremely
fond of oleander plants kept a very
largo tree in her room. . One tiny In
midwinter she ting out a portion of the
earth and filled In the space with fresh
soil from the florist's in order that her
favorite might throw out a new crop
st blossoms. That night she complained
f serious 'Irritation of her throat, . A
few daya later tho glanda below tSn
enr enlarged until they wore on a lino
with her check, For nearly a year
every remedy known to medical sol
once was tried. Tho swelling at lasl
yielded to treatment and she perma
nently recovered.
Another woman transplanted and rc
potted a largo number of oleanders, be
coming much wearied with her task.
She complained that night of a curious
Irritation In her throat. A swelling
came In tho glands below her ear. All
remedies failed. It became malignant
and caused her death about six months
afterward.
Within tho past year a death from
cancer of the face or mouth has oc
curred In a household where are tho
largest and most beautiful oleanders )
have ever seen. Yet another case Is
that of a woman of middle ago whose
favorite flower was the oleander. Sho
kept all varieties, collecting them from
various places as she found new ones.
She had a clearly developed cancer,
look treatment for years, and was, sc
the doctors assured her, entirely cured.
Whether any symptoms of the disease
have developed within the hist eight or
ten years I am unable to say.
I might give other instances, hut
these are to my mind sulllclcut ground
for belief that there Is some connection
between the oleander and glanriulnr
affections of a more or less malignant
character. New York Sun.
MANY CANNIBALS STILL EXTANT
1 1 ii mil it I'l cm 1 1 Katen In Different I'urtM
of the World.
Thorp are many places In the world
to-day where cannibalism nourishes
Scattered about the Pacific Ocean ar
many cannibal islands, where the na
tives eat human flesh because they like
It for food. In others cannibalism 1)
practiced as a sort of religious rite.
Tho natlvps of New Guinea are con
firmed cannibals, and not long ago t lioj
killed and ate the members of an ex.
plorlng party led by the wcll-knowi)
missionary and explorer, Dr. Chalmers.
Dr. Chalmers was one of the found'
ers of Port .Moresby, the principal town
In the British part of tho island, mid
had done more In the way of exploring
New Guinea than any other man. On
his last expedition up the Fly Ulver
the largest In New Guinea, ho was a
first received with all tho old-time re
spect which the natives were (wont to
show him, but one night they killed
the whole party and ate their bodies
Including that of their friend, the doc
tor.
seven Spanish sailors who were
wrecked near the mouth of the Mini
Ulver, In West Africa, were captured
and oaten by the natives recently.
To-day there are cannibal tribes llv
lug In many parts of South America.
Such tribes inhabit that region of wil
derness belonging to Colombia known
as the Caeaquotu, and the brother ol
General Uufuel Keyes, the special on
voy of Colombia to this country in tin
Panama matter, was killed and outer.
by some of them while attempting tc
cross to the bond waters of tho Amn
7,011.
Some of the tribes of northern Luzoi;
are suspected of being addicted to can
ulballsm. Grewsome tales of ennui
ballstlc practices are told of the voodoc
worshipers of the interior of Havtl.
New York Sun.
Duties of tho War Nurse.
They must know as well as a rcgu
hit soldier how to make a camp and
take euro of It.
They must bo able to forage for food
with the troops and know how to cook
it after obtaining it.
They must have nerves steely enough
to go out on the battletleld and aid in
picking up tho wounded under fire.
They must know how to arrange and
erect a Held hospital, keep It In order,
and soothe the sick and wounded.
They must bo able to remain on duty
eighteen hours nt a stretch among iho
wounded without flinching.
They must at times trudge alongHho
roads in rain, mud. heat or cold, Ilka
the soldiers, marching with heavy out
lays. They must bo able to sleep in blan
kets on the ground at any time when
duty compels it.
They must have a comprehensive,
hlea of medicine and surgery and must
assist the surgeons at operations.
They must eat the rough and fro
(luoutly spoiled rations of the troops
without complaint.
And they must, above all things, be
courageous to the point of heroism
when ti human Is to be aided. "Wash
ington Times.
Ill Argument.
"So you are an advocate of vegeta
rianism!" "Yes."
"For what reason?"
"If I can persuade everybody else to
live on vegetables, perhaps eggs and
beef will become cheap enough for mo
to have nil I want of thorn." Wash
ington Star.
On Ilniul.
"What's become of that handsome
woman who could read hands so clev
erly?"
"Oh, she's In her element."
"Where's her element?"
"At Pnim Heaon, or course."-
Cleveland Plain Dealer,
HIMOE, OE THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Odd, CttrlotiH ntitl IifiusrJinbfe Phase
of llii itiuti Nature Graphically Por
trayed by Knilticnt Word Artlstn of
Our Own Day A limited of J'un.
"I wonder what has become of
Goodley. When ho was at school, you
remember, ho used to talk so much
about uplifting mankind. -Entered the
ministry, perhaps."
"Oh, no! lie's manufacturing oxplo
nlvo shells and torpedoes." Philadel
phia Ledger.
Directly Under It.
"It's funny," said the long-winded
bore, "but nobody ever scorns glad to
nee me."
"And haven't you over found out the
causo of your unpopularity?" inquired
lis candid friend.
"No, I can't discover it."
"Well, Well; it's right under your
very nose." Philadelphia Press.
Kxtreinc Measures.
WWJWrW&L . -fit
'33 .
Mother If I catch you chasing thosa
hens again I'll wash your face every
day next week! Punch.
True I'noiijili.
To who -Did you tell Markle.v you
had Just bought a magazine illleV
Browne Yes.
Towne You're a truthful gentle
man! Why, It's only a cheap single
barrel affair.
Browne Well. I bought it through
nn advertisement in a magazine, didn't
I? Philadelphia Pros.
Charitable Sex.
He (at amateur concert) What do
you think of Miss Serecc-her's voice?
She Oh, I think It's all of what it's
cracked up to bo.
Then or Never.
Miss Willing Should n girl allow
her fiance to kiss her before they are
married?
Mrs. Wodderly Well, if sho wanta
him to kiss her at all she should.
Something to Mow.
"I wonder if they produce hay in
the arctic Holds?" said the ballroom
boarder.
"I don't know whether they call It
hay or not." replied thv cheerful Idiot,
"but it s something the Eskimos.'
A Princely Reward.
"Hoy." said tho wealthy man, boa mi
lug with gratitude; "you have done mo
a great service and I am going to re
ward you."
"Oh. thank you, sir!" gasped the
small boy.
"Here, in tills case, is the first dollar
I ever made. Gaze on It and lot it in
spire you to be Industrious and savinir.
Good-by." Philadelphia Ledger.
The Cares of Youth.
r-'V-
"Wofs worryln' him? In fer a lick
In'?" "Nopo; worseer'n that. He says tor.
flay's the day bo's decided tor proposi
to the teacher."
Why Sho Objected.
"1 suppose, my dear," said old Mon
eybags, "that you object to my using
tobacco becauso it is a poison."
"Yesr," replied his young wife; "be
cAtice It is er such a slow poison."
Slight Mistake.
Shopper (In department store) Isn't
1 rather early to have those mosqultc
nets on sulo.
Saleslady Bog pardon, but thoso art
bourdlng-housc blnnkcU.
M 1
-mo
r IV.7A
7 'iA.,li
rV.
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FAVORITES I
..j..j.4,4.4.4...4...4.4.4...4.4.4.4.4.....;...
The Jlarefoot Hoy.
Blessings on thee, littlo man,
Barefoot hoy with cheek of tan;
With thy tiiraed-tip pantaloons,
And thy merry whistled tunes;
Willi thv rod lit. redder still.
Kissed by strawberries on the hill;
With the sunshine on thy face
'ChwMii.li 41iv tnrii ln-im'H iillllltV Cr.tCe!
From my heart 1 give thee joy;
I was once a barefoot hoy.
Prince, thou art; the grown-up man
Only Is republican.
Lot the lailllon-dollarcd ride;
niirofnnf. trncliritiir at his side,
Thou hast more than he enn buy,
In the reach of car and eyt
Outward sunshine, inward joy,
Blessings on thee, barefoot hoy!
Oh, for boyhood's time of June,
Crowding years in one brief moon
Whnu nil tlibiL's 1 hoard or saw,
Mc, their master, waited for!
I was ricli in flowers and trees,
Hummingbirds and honey bees;
For mv snort the soulrrel played,
Plied the snouted mole his spado;
For my taste, the blackberry cone
Purpled over hedge and stone;
Laughed the brook for my delight,
Through the day and through the night,
Whispering at the garden wall,
Talked with me from fall to fall;
Mino the snnd-rimmed pickerel pond;
Mino the walnut slopes beyond;
Mine, on beading orchard trees,
Apples of llesperides!
Still as my horizon grew,
Lnrger grow my riches, too;
All the world I saw or knew
.Seemed a complex Chinese toy,
Fashioned for a barefoot hoy!
Oh, for festal dainties spread
Like my howl of milk and bread!
(Pewter spoon and howl of wood)
On the doorstep, gray and rude!
O'er me like a regal tent,
Cloudy-ribbed, the sunset bent,
'Purple curtained, fringed with gold,
Looped in many a wind-swung fold;
While for music came the play
Of tlio pied frogs' orchestra,
.And i light the noisy choir,
Lit the fly his lamp of fire.
I was monarch; pomp and joy
Waited on tho barefoot boy.
('Iieci ily. then, my littlo man,
Live and laugh as boyhood can;
Though the flinty slopes be hard,
Stubble xpuared the new-mown sward,
Every morn shall lead thee throuirh
Fresh baptisms of the dew;
Every evening from thy feet
Shall the cool winds kiss the heat;
All too soon those feet must hide
In the prison cells of pride;
Lose the freedom of the sou,
Liko a colt's, for work he shod;
Mado to trend the mills of toil,
Up and down in ceaseless moil,
Happy if their track he found
Never on forbidden ground!
Happy If they sink not in
Quick and treacherous sands of sin!
Ah, that thou eouldst know thy joy
Ere it passes, barefoot boy!
John G. Whittior.
OLD MONASTERY IN RUINS.
Home of the CnriuelitcH in Mexico Ih
Now a M iihh of Debris.
The suburban town of San Angel, at
the base of the foothills, three-quarters
of an hour from the capital by
electric car, is every year becoming
more fashionable as a summer resort,
Ii nd every year, as modern conven
iences and better houses are provided
in the outlying districts, more people
take up their permanent abode there.
To the casual visitor to San Angel
tho most interesting feature Is the
handsome old church of Nuestra Sen-
f'ra del Carmen. Its triple domes, with
heir tiles shining brightly in the sun
ight, are the tlrst objects that arrest
ho attention of strangers approaching
Iho town. Its Carmelite bell tower.
Or campanarlo. Is distinctive, and the
Idllice is one of the handsomest eccles
iastical monuments in all Mexico. It
was dedicated to the worshop of God
In 1t51 7, or three years before the pil
trlm fathers of New England landed
hi Plymouth Hook. The Interior is
handsomely decorated and contains
Lome notable ijalntings by the famous
fdexlcnn artist Cabrera. Pious women
have adorned the chapel of our lady,
vhleh Is one of flip features of this
iinclent church, and the magnificent
Phurriguoresque ornamentation of the
jiorthern transept is a splendid speci
men of this most distinctive Spanish
Jnodo of decoration. Beneath this
transept rest in their eternal sloop -15
American soldiers, who were killed or
died of disease during the war of the
North American invasion, when the ad
joining monastery of the Carmelite
fathers was converted into a military
hospital and barracks, the good fathers
nursing the wounded Americans with
such Christian devotion and good will
that when the troops evacuated San
Angel monks and soldiers fell on one
another's necks and wept.
Janvier speaks of San Angel's church
as follows:
"In the year 1(11.'! Don Felipe Do
Guzman, n pious 'cacique' of Ohimalis
tac, In fulfillment of bis father's testa
ment, gave up to tho Carmelite order
a liuerta of considerable size. Here
the Carmelites built a little hospice.
Don Fllepe De Guzman prcaentlj died,
and a littlo lnted died also his widow,
childless. By her will the entire es
tate of which slio died possessed pass
ed to the Carmelite fathers, und by
thoso it was devoted to the building
of the existing monastery and church.
The plnns for these buildings were pre
pared by the celebrated architect Fray
Andres De Son Miguel, a lay brother
of the Carmelite order, and at that
time held to be the lirst architect of
New Spain. That this reputation was
well merited is shown by the beauty of
his still existing work. The building
was begun June L'O, Kilo, and was
pushed with so much vigor that Vi
church and convent were finished woT
in two years. The church was dciLx
ted to San Angelo Martir. whence
came the name of the little town that
presently grow up around it. Modern
Mexico,
SYSTEM HAS BAD FEATURES.
ArKUiucutH In 1'nvor of Subht ItutliiR
Post Checks for Money Orders.
An object lesson showing the effects
and exponsiveness of the postal money
order system was given a few days
ago to several members of tho nouso
rostofllce Committee by Cnptuln Henry
A. Castle, auditor for the Postoflleu
Department.
Mr. Castle first conducted his visit
ors to the "auditor's library," as it is
called. Hero are 7,000 loose-leaved
binders, ouch making a volume larger
than the largest counting-house ledger
and weighing 15 pounds. These 7,000
binders are filled annually with post
masters' statements of money orders
issued and paid, which are sent to the
auditor's olllce with tho 40,000,000
money orders issued nnunlly as vouch
ers. The party next visited the "inachlne
room," where scores of the high-salaried
clerks were operating adding ma
chines which verified the additions of
the money order statements sent in
by postmasters. More than 150,000 or
ders are daily handled in tills room.
The visitors then went to tho "round
table" room, where other clerks wero
distributing an average of 150.000
money orders daily. The orders aro
thence taken (and the party followed
them) to forty desks where nimble
lingered operators, mostly young wom
en, separate thoin by towns In each
Sttite, arranged alphabetically.
The money order vouchers tire now
ready to be checked with the accounts
of the issuing postmaster and .".5 ex
pert clerks were found doing tills.
From the checkers the money orders
are tied in bundles, properly labeled
and filed in the archives of tho audi
tor's olllce for seven years, as required
by law. The postmasters' statements,
constituting the accounts, are filed in
tho loose-leaf binders as described ami
aro ready for entry in tho ledgers of
tho bureau Avhere the accounts tiro
kept. The 7.000 volumes of tho state.
ments are preserved also for a term
of seven years.
The effect on the visiting Congress
men was startling. They learned also
that the majority of money orders nro
for less than $2.50 each. For their is
sue third ami fourth class postmnsters
get the entire fee of three cents. First
and second class postmasters employ
high-salaried clerks for this work anil
the cost to the service is still greater.
The paying of the orders, the book
keeping and the transmitting of them
to Washington entail a heavy outlay
for salaries, without a penny of com
pensating revenue; so that, in addi
tion to the loss of time in going to tho
postoflice. applying for money orders.
and awaiting their issue, is this addb
tional pecuniary loss to the govern
ment.
When the tour of the olllce had been
ended the visitors asserted that Con
gress should, without delay, adopt
some plan whereby this expensive and
burdensome work could be reduced, or
at least its enormous growth discour
aged. The remedy for much of this evil,
olllclals say, lies in the adoption of tho
post check plan, as post check curren
cy would require no auditing. Wash
ington Star.
Too Versatile.
Poor Jack of all trades! So strong H
the prejudice against him that ho ia
eveii denied the right to practice ono
avocation lest it interfere with bis call
ing. Tills is an ago of narrow special
ization. Whon John Belcher, known
now as a daring and original architect,
was a young man be gave a good deal
of time to music.
Ho had a lino voice, and was greatly
in demand at evening parties.
One evening, after ho bad sung, to
loud applause, he overboard two gen
tlemen talking him over:
"Who was the follow that sang just
now?" asked one. "The professoinnl, I
mean."
"Oil, that was Mr. Belcher, an archi
tect." "Well, he can't bo much of an archi
tect ir he can sing like that."
The listener never sang again savo
at home. He decided that it was bet
tor to bo a good architect than a pretty
good musician and a fairly good archi
tect. Many a woman loves her busbaui
less than her husband's wife.
