f . .4rnft9MK
"MJrtJt'"
n
AKED EQUAL TO SITUATION
Example of the Soft Answer That
Turneth Away Wrath Also
the Truth.
Ono of Dr. Aked's most nrdent sup
porters when that divlno wag pastor
f Mr. John D. Rockefeller's church
Js fond of tolling what ho considers a
Jtrlklng exnmplo of Dr. Akod's wit.
Dr. Akcd was fond of taking long
country walks, and ono day, being far
In tho country and wandering through
field, ho and his friend noticed a sign
nailed to a trco. "No trespassing
horo."
Hurrying to got out of tho forbidden
ground thoy met a farmer who assailed
them grimly with tho remark:
"Trespassers In this field are prose
cuted." DrAkod smiled at thoMrato farmer.
"But wo aro not trespassers, my
good man," said ho.
"What bo you then?" demanded the
farmor.
"Wo aro Presbyterians, my dear sir,"
replied Dr. Akod and walked away.
Saving a Desperate Man.
"Why did you get engaged to Har
ry? You swore that you would never,
never, have anything to do with such
a man."
"Yes, dear, I know I did. nut well,
I wouldn't have accepted him If he
hadn't made such a perfectly dreadful
threat."
"Oh! That old stall about rushing
out and committing suicide?"
"No, worso than that."
"But any of thoso threats aro bluffs.
I suppose ho said ho'd kill tho next
man who called on you, eh?"
"No, no I l'vo heard that before,
Dearie, ho threatened that If I did not
accept him he'd go and propose to you.
And I believe he would havo dono It,
too ho was perfectly desperate!"
He Was Shown in Missouri.
! "An Englishman who recently ar
rived In this country wont out Into
Marlon county to visit some of tho
Lord Scully lands, nnd whilo wander
ing about ran onto a small whlto
Bkunk," says Tom O'Neal. "After
wards, on making inquiry as to what
ilnd of animal it was and tho namo of
it, ho was told that It was a polecat
IVfter ho had changed his clothes ho
Eat down and wrote to his family back
n England as follows:
" 'I havo been out looking over tho
country today, and In traveling about I
met with an American cat, a beautiful
llttlo creature, but I think It bad tho
most offensive breath, don't you know,
of any animal I over saw In my life.' "
V-Kansas City Journal.
Back In Good Old Bowl Days.
I A man of apparent means brought
Jtwo boys Into a barber shop for n hair
jcut. Whilo waiting for the complo
.lion of tbo job ho said:
"I never eat In a barber's chair when
I was a kid. My brother used to go
over to tho englno house and borrow
tho horso clippers. Then my mother
,would put a bowl on my head and cut
around it. Until I was 12 years old I
always looked Hko a window washer's
.brush."
I Dr. Pierco's Plea&tint Pellets regulate
nd invigorate stomaoh, liver and bowels.
Sugar-coated, tiny granules, easy to take.
po not gripe.
Tlmo is incalculably long, and every
iday Is a vessel Into which very much
may bo poured. If opo will really fill
lit up. Goethe,
1 Hopo Is a tfood thing to have, but
;you can't hajg It up with tho three
ball merchavit
rit.ns cniiRD in o to i l days. ot
.TonrrtniBKls' wl'l rotund money It i'Ai OINT
MENT falli to euro any tuso of Itching, mind
lUleodlcgul'Proiruillnicl'llcslnGloUdays. Wo.
1 Soms married men look upon home
as a placo to rest and somo others
get anything but a rest while thero.
1 LEWIS' Single Binder costs moro than
other 5c cigars. Made of extra quality
tobacco.
I Many a flowery Bpeech has been
nipped In tho bud by a nonapprecla
tlvo uudlence.
Mrs. Wlnslow's Soothtnpt Syrup for Children
teething, softens the gums, reduces tnltnmmiv
tlon, allaya pain, cures wind colic, 25c a bottle,
i Wo often wonder
would do for a livlrsg
ly was a fool killer
what lawyers
If thero actual-
FARMS FOR RENT OR SALE ON CROP
payments. J. MULIIALL. Sioux City. la.
He is a bravo man who will face
tho parson with a short haired woman.
You Can Help
Yourself
Back to health by as
sisting the stomach in
its work of digestion
and assimilation by
keeping the liver act
ive and the bowels
open. For this par
ticular work there is
nothing quite so
good as
HOSTETTER'S
STOMACH BITTERS
n ' " ' .X!- -
li ' - " """ a o
THE Portugueso cruiser Kcpublica, sent on n visit to this country because of our recognition of tho new re
public, attracted crowds of slght-seers at New York, and ono of tho chief sights was tho ship's cook. This
man, who in tho photograph Is holding tho knife, was a cannibal king In Uganda, Africa, and waa captured by
tho Portugueso a year or so ago.
WOMAN A
K-
Wall Street Brokers Draw
Sex Line.
the
New York Consolidated Exchange
Firm Likely to Be Disciplined by
Board for Its Violation Un
written Rule Exists.
New York. A Wall street brokerage
firm has got Itself Into troublo and
may be suspended by tho Consolidated
stock exchange becauso It recently
opened a women's department, fitted
up with a few rocking chairs, had a
woman In a whito Bwcater stationed nt
the ticker to read the quotations and
allowed woman speculators to como
down and bring their young ones with
them If they cared to which they did,
In somo cases. This is a punishable
offense in tho street. Not tho children,
bufthelr mothers aro the ones object
ed to. There aro no cries of Place
aux dames! In the stock market zone.
The establishment with the nursery
attachment to its women's department
is on New street, just a block away
from tho exchange of which tho firm
Is a member. It had really only Just
begun to build up ttio new branch of
Us business when tho exchange heard
of it and signaled the cnll to arms of
tho board of governors. This had the
effect of clearing tho women's room of
all children and of all but two wo
men, whilo the person in tho whlto
sweater who had been fingering many
yards of ticker tape wns supplanted by
a man.
You may search tho rule book of
tho Consolidated from cover to cover
for an article or a by-law forbidding
women to como down and trado In
stocks like tho men, and to bring
their youngsters along with them, as
now and then a proud father has dono
on a half-holiday, but you will not find
what you aro looking for. Tho rule
Iowa Town Moved Two Miles
Community la Betrayed by Coup of
Thrifty Councilman Stampedes
Residents to New City.
Des Moines, la. Wheeling a town
two miles overnight!
This feat, accomplished by tho resi
dents of a thriving lown community,
and the exciting eventB that preceded
tho municipal hcglra wcro vividly re
lated by a former resident of tho town
In question. The Incident occurred In
the early '90s, when the railroads
practically made over tho maps of
many portions of the west.
"The ono great handicap of Cal
Hopo for that is, or wns, tho namo of
tho town, was the fact that It pos
sessed no railway connection.
"But ono day a man, glorying In a
gdnerous girth nnd n many hued
waistcoat, arrived In Calliope. To the
village president ho signified his do
6lro to meet tho vlllngo board, and It
was convened In session extraordin
ary that very evening In tho school
house. To this staid and deliberative
body the imposing stranger outlined
his plan for a newer nnd a better Cal
liope. Tho Mississippi & Pacific
Coast railway that was not Its numo,
but It will servo ho declared had do
elded to extend Its projected lino
through Calliopo on Us way to tho
shoro of tho Pacific. As evidence of.
tho good faith of tho company tho
representative exhibited a map whoro
In Calliopo was indicated by a black
dot, whose dimension were, excoeded
by none no, not evon Chicago. Tho
CANNIBAL KING NOW SKIP'S
BAD LOSER
exists, none the less. It simply Isn't
printed. The nearest thing to It In
print is a rulo prohibiting "acts detri
mental to tho exchango" on the part
of Its members, which, as ono of tho
board of governors pointed out, might
be mudo to cover any number 'of
thlng3. Among thorn is the catering
to feminlno speculators, ho said. The
fact that a sort of kindergarten an
nex went with the women's depart
ment had nothing to do wUh tho case.
Wall Btreet half expects to seo the
proprietors of tho Now street rocking
chair trading club and day nursery
punished in somo way by suspension
from tho exchange, possibly. It is
pretty certain that tho club and the
nursery will go out of existence. It
will havo to. Women who want to
dnbblo in stocks nro as unwelcome ns
a crook below tho "dead line." All
this In spito of tho fact that only a
few weeks ago Mrs. Emmellno Pnnk
hurst told Wall street any number of
stories about women who had gone in
to business and made a success of It.
"It's tho experience of hundreds of
stock brokers that tho woman who
Sues Woman
Austrian Army Lieutenant Falls In
Unique Method of Courtship in
Now York.
Now York. An international couit
ship has reached Its official end horo
In tho signing of a court order dis
continuing tho breach of promise suit
that Lieut. Edward Starz of tho Aus
trian army brought against Miss Helen
MeMurray of Troy for $25,000 dam
ages. Tho Austrian lieutenant aban
doned tho suit on tho advlco of his
lawyer.
"Tho lieutenant was not moreen-
-
stranger went on to point out tho ad
vantages that would accrue to tho
town by tho fulfillment of tho plans
of the railroad company.
"The supposition, however, was not
well founded, ns ho soon found. If
the rnilroad wished to como to Cal
liope, well and good, declared the
sturdy burghers, but Calliopo would
offer no bribes. At this tho railroad
representative lost somo of his stiav
ity, nnd informed his audience that If
Calliopo did not choose to accept tho
generous compromise held out to it by
tho railroad, the company would mako
Calliope como to the road.
"Then ono day an ugly rumor was
afloat. It was whispered from mouth
to mouth that one of the councllmen
who had been most emphatic In de
nouncing the railroad agent's proffer
had bought a quarter section in tho
path of the projected rnilroad, and In
company with tho railroad ndvance
agent was laying out tho new town
Further investigation disclosed that
tho councilman had bought an even
160 acres of land what was more, ho
had parceled It out in regulation city
lots, had opened a cracker box office
and wns doing n flourishing real estato
business.
"Tho hcglra continued. Tho tho
same suave gentleman visited tho
principal merchants of tho town and
mado them nn offer of a freo site in
tho now city If they would move. It
was too much. Immodlntely thero was
a scramble to sccuro tho most deslr
ablo locations In the now city which,
by tho way, ho said was to bo named
Hawnrden in his own honor. Ono by
COOK
iwauMwrnJ mm
comes down hero to speculate Is n
bad loser," said ono officer of tho Con
solidated recently. "Say what you
pleiifio about this hoing tho day of
equality, but deep down in our hearts
wo feel that thero Is a difference.
Stock gambling Is a man's gnmo. Wo
don't want women breaking In."
This man was inclined to excuso tho
Now street brokers on tho ground that
tho firm had been a member of tho
exchange less than two years, and
perhaps did not know better. If ttint
were tho case tho alarms sounded by
tho board of governors when thoy
henrd of tho women's department and
its nursery annex had evidently taught
tho young firm a lesson. A visitor
dropped In to seo tho feminlno spec
ulators In action with their young
ones romping In tho shadow of tho
quotation board and tho ticker basket,
but thero was none of that to bo
seen.
"When a woman makes something
on tho market," said ono broker of
thirty years' experlenco in tho street,
"she tnkes the credit oV It all to her
self. It wns sho who did it. When
she loses, It was her broker's fault.
Ho deceived her. And n peculiar fxnit
is that in losing sho cannot quite clear
her mind of tho suspicion that what
sho lost tho broker gained."
to Win Love
nry," declared tho latter. "His only
hopo In bringing tho suits was to seo
Miss MeMurray and win her again.
When he found that ho could not seo
her ho was broken-hearted. It Is a
sad experlenco for a young man of his
type, and ho Is going away to try to
forgot hor."
Lieut. Starz mot Miss MeMurray In
Vienna In August, 1010, followed her to
Pnrls, wooing hor ardently, and to
continue his nttcntious obtained a
j ear's leave of absence from his regi
ment, abandoning an opportunity for
promotion.
ono they set to work to move tholr
structures which wore of framo con
struction two miles down tho slopo
to Uawarden.
"It was no use. And even tho old
timers saw It. Mournfully thoy, too,
bade farewell to Calliopo and botook
themselves and their nbodeB to Ua
warden, which grow to a city of 1,500
within a month.
"And Calliope? Well, what wns
onco Calliope Is now n flourishing
cornfield."
BODY IN COFFIN NOT WIFE'S
Last Look at Dead Brings Joy to
Maldvn (Mass.) Home similarity
of Names Caused Mistake.
Maiden, MnsB. Abinham Levlne
nnd his three children woro weoplng
over tho coffin bought for Mrs. Lo
vino, tho wife nnd mother, when Abra
ham, opening the coffin for ono last
look at his wife, discovered that tho
body was not hers.
Mrs. Lovlnu had been a patient nt
tho Towksbury hospital and Abraham
hnd received word that hIio wns dead.
Investigation showed that his wifo
Is alive, and Hint tho mlatako hud beon
duo to tho fnct that tho name of the
dead woninn was somowhat similar.
Quail Plentiful In California.
Los Angeles, Cal. Ranchers from
tho Coacholla valley, who wero In Los
Angoles, reported that quail wero bo
thick In tho vnlloy that crops of nil
kinds wero being destroyed, despito
tho efforts of tho stato gnmo war
dons, who nro now trnpplng tho birds
by thousands and -ending them to oth
er sections of tho state,
INCREASE IN NUMBER
OF AMERICANS
GOING TO CANADA
Although Wostorn Canada BUfTorod,
ns did many othor portions of tho
west, from untoward conditions, which
turned ono of tho most promising
crops over scon In that country, into
but llttlo moro than an averago yield
of nil grains, thero Is loft In tho
farmers' hands, a big mnrgln of profit.
Of courso thero were many farmcra
who woro fortunnto enough to harvest
nnd market n big yield, and with tho
prlceB that woro socurcd mado hand
sorao returns. From wheat, oats, bar
ley nnd flax marketed to tho 1st of
January, 1912, thero wbb a gross rov
cnuo of $75,384,000. Tho cattlo, hogs,
poultry nnd dairy proceeds brought
this up to S101,G20,000 or 21 million
dollars In oxcosa of 1910. Thero was.
still In tho farmers' hands at that
tlmo about 95 million bushols of whoat
worth at least another slxty-flvo mil
lion dollars (allowing for Inferior
grades), besldos about 160 million
bushels of onts to say nothing of bar
ley and flax, which would run Into sov
oral million of dollars.
Thoro is a great Inrush of settlors
to occupy tho vacant InndB through
out Manitoba, Saskatchewan nnd Al
berta. Tho leports from tho Govern
ment show that during tho past year
upwards of 131,000 Americans crossed
tho border Into Canada. A great many
of theso took up farms, over ton thou
sand having homestondod, In fact tho
records show that ovory stato in tho
Union contributed. A largor number,
not caring to go so far away as tho
homestendlng nrcA, havo purchased
lands nt from fifteen dollars an ncro
to twonty-flvo dollars an ncro. Tho
prospocts for n good crop for 1912
nro as satisfactory as for many years.
Tho land has had Bufllclcnt moisture,
nnd with a reasonably early spring, It
is snfo to predict a record crop.
Thoso who havo not had tho latoBt
lltoraturo sent out by tho Government
agents should send to tho ono ncarost,
and Bccuro a copy.
No True Friend.
There's a Hugh Ford and a Harry
Ford at tho now theater. Tho simi
larity of initials somotlmes makes
troublo. Tho other day a porfumed
nolo camo for "II. Ford," and Hugh
Ford, opening it, found It was from
a woman. Tho next day Harry Ford
oponod a lottor addressed to "II.
Ford." Then ho passed over to Hugh
tho bill marked "duo and payablo,"
which It contained.
"You'ro no truo friend," said Hugh
Ford. "You might havo paid my bill
for mo; I kept your dato." Now York
Lottor to tho Cincinnati Times-Star.
Certainly Not.
Mrs. Styles Don't you think this
now hat Improves my looks, doarT
Mr. Styles I supposo bo.
"Out what makes you look so
cross?"
"I'm thinking of tho bill for that
hat. You can't expect that to Improve
my looks." Yonkors Statosman.
Stop the Patn.
Tha hurt of a burn or a cut stops when
Cole's Carbollsalvo Is applied. It lieals
Sulckly and provonts scars. 25a and EOa by
rufrglsts. For freo Biunplo wrlto to
J. W. Colo & Co.. Ulijolc Itlver Falls. Wis.
Rollcs of Barborlsm.
Ilowltt Spenklng of relics of bar
barism Jowott I notlcod them; you ought
to shavo yourself.
TO OOKK A COtn IN ONB DAT
Tilt's I.AXAT1VU IlllUMO Quinine Tablet
Dm.TffUtiirnftinil inoner tf It fall
ins to euro.
H.W.
UltUVli'tf denature li on each box.
ao.
An engaged ,couplo profor a Up to
II? Bllenco rather than a heart to heart
talk.
H
H
k
ft
iiX.
HTfTTJH I KWIVPJ
UP
.
m
SH
m
t
'i
ALCOHOL-3 PER CENT
AVcgefable. Preparation for As
similating ilie Food and Regula
ling the Stomachs and Dowels of
tra
:
1.1
m
Promotes Digcstion,Chccrful
nessandResl Contains neither
Opium .Morphine nor Mineral
NotNahcotic
Rtfipt eON DrSANVELHTCXSR
7l
l!
s
ft
limpkin Sitd'
ftUktUtSalU
ii7 Stt 'J
liptrmii
AYCurlniaUStA
hirm Sent '
flmrSttd Suy
tfrnbyrftn flavor
m
t
W
M,
r."'S
A perfect Remedy for Constipa
tion , Sour Stomach.Diarrhoea,
Worms .Convulsions ,Fevcr i sh
ncss and Loss of Sleep.
facsimile Signature '
The CENTAtm company,
MTI
IS
J1
KG
'
IS
NEW YORK.
1
fiiintntitnl uitffftt tlin f?irwt?iruf
Exact Cppy of Wrapper.
SAVED FROM
AN OPERATION
How Mrs. Reed of Peoria, 111.,
Escaped The Sur
geon's Knife.
Peoria, 111. "I wish to let every on4
know whntLydinE.Pinkham'sVego tabic
Compound has dona
for mo. Fortwoyenra
I suffered. Tho doc
tor said I had a tumor
nnd thn only remedy
waa tho surgeon's
knife. My mother
bought mo Lydia E.
Pinkhnm'a Vegota
blo Compound, and
today I am a well, and
healthy woman. For
months I Buffered
from inflammation, and your Sanative
Wash relieved mo. I am glad to tell
nnyono what your medicines have dona
for mo. You can uso my testimonial in
any way you wish, and I will bo glad
to nnswor lottcrs." Mrs. Christina
Reed, 105 Mound St, Peoria, 111.
Mrs. Lynch Also Avoided
Operation.
Jcosup, Pa. "After tho birth of my
fourth child, I hnd sovcro organic inflam
mation. I would havo Buch terrible pains
that it did not seem as though I could
stand it. This kept up for thrco long
months, until two doctors decided that
an operation was needed.
"Then ono of my friends recommended
Lydia E. Pinkhnm'a Vegetable Com-
found and after taking it for two months
was a well woman." Mrs. Joseph A.
Lynch, Jcssup, Po.
Women who Buffer from femalo ilia
should try Lydia E. Pinkhnm'a Vegota
blo Compound, ono of tho most success
ful remedies tho world has ever known,
beforo submitting to a surgical opera
tion. The Wretchedness
of Constipation
Can quickly bo overcome by
CARTER'S LITTLE
LIVER PILLS.
Purely vegetable
act surely and
gently on the
liver, euro
Biliousness,
Head
ache, Dizzi
ness, and Indigestion. They do their duty.
SMALL PILL, SMALL DOSE, SMALL PRICE.
Genuine must bear Signature
LIVE STOCK AND
MISCELLANEOUS
Electrotypes
IN O.RBAT VARIETY
FORj BALft AT THB
LOWEST PRICES BY
WESTERN NEWSPAPER UNION
21-331 W. Aflttmi 6t, Chlcttfo
of this paper
'& desiring to
advertised in its columns should
insist upon having what they ask for,
refusing all substitutes or imitations.
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have
Always Bough!
In
Use
Over
Thirty Years
CASTORIA
THI OaNTAUN COMPANY. NIK VOftK OITY.
finite
' 'lh, V FJf,!,
AmmWf ?
Amwmwr.hmPBX
mmm hitti w
mmmmmT IVE.K.
Off Jojjt? ' '"'"
BMMBXBWBf
k
Bears the A v
Signature AjJ
y For
Ill
('!
