GODDO, THE
HOLY MONKEY
By HENRY AUSTIN
'I Kl I
BjBB 1 1 .wv.v.v.v.w.v-v-v.v.YiVtVrtVtViViVtVtViVi i tV Vi Vi 1 1 1 1 i-l
) s W(3AB02V
I AST of Plttaburg tlioy
El look upon tlio man who
I koos to Chicago as
I brave. A woman via
ltor Is bulled us a hor
olno upon hor roturn.
Tlioy regnrd Chicago
na tlio frontier of tho
United States, teeming
with wild holdups,
i;hnntly inurdorH, tho
mncca fpr conlldoiico
men and desperado
gangs.
Such Is not tho enso
to-dny. Perhaps It waa
a quarter of n century ago, hut tho
prosont-dny Chlcngo la porhapa tho
most carefully guarded city In tho
country,
Tho why and whoroforo of this
Greatly Improved condition la 5,000
pollcomon-nthlotos. And tho ronaon
for tho athletic forco Is tho civil aor
vlco law with Uh phyBlcnl require
inentfl, which tho mnn who would bo
conio n "cop" muat oqtinl or oxcol to
bocomo a fult-flodgod minion of tho
law.
Ho must havo n perfect cheat, heart, lungo hlB
miMcloB muat bo strong, hla bonea well knitted,
ho must bo nt lonat flvo feet eight lnchoa In
holght, and not moro than six feet flvo lnchoa.
Applicants In taking .physical toota muBt tip tho
Bcnlea botweon ICO and 2B0 pounds.
Obesity, mtiBculnr weakneaa and poor phyatquo .
nro lnsurmountablo barriers to tho man with a
craving for a place among tho "finest." Evory
inusclo In tho body undorgoos n tost, which la
inndo by tho ubo of machlnoa nnd weights. Tho
Chlcngo pollcomnn muat bo nblo to carry himself
well, ho must bo shifty on IiIb foot, quick to think
nnd net. Ills oycB nnd warn muat bo perfect nnd
hlu family troo muat bo absolutely dovold of
horodltnry dlaonsca.
In fact tho Chicago forco to-day Ib ono which do
mnnds that u man ho n soldlor, nthjoto nnd min
ion of tho law combined. During cortnln months
each year oxnmlnntloiiB nro conducted nnd dur
ing thu fiscal twolvomonth C.000 mon woro ox
amlned. Of this number about one-half woro sue
coBBful. First tho doctor looks over tho appli
cants, then tho physical examiner takes tho mon
in hand nnd puts them through tho most rigid
toBts roqulrcd nnywhoro in tho world. Aftor that
tho wrltton examination la given in which ench
uppllcnnt'a education is brought to tho foro.
Civil sorvico tests uro sovoro and absolutely
honest. It la up to tho applicant himself to pass
tho tcBta. You cannot bo appointed upon tho
Chlcngo pollco forco by posieaBlng ncqunlnlanco
.with a man "with n pull." So great has boon tho
bucccbb of tho aystom Installed by President Hi
ton Lower of tho civil sorvico commission and his
nldea II. 1). Fnrgo nnd M. L. McKlnloy thnt to
day ovory city of any bIzo In tho United States
has its oyoB focuaod upon tho dotalla and moth
odfl employed by tho Chlcngonna.
Since President I.owor becnnio tho lending light
in tho work of giving Chicago an olllclont pollco
forco, great atrldcB havo boon taken by tho city
toward making Hb cltlzona absolutely Bafo from
criminals.
Physical Exuminor Kdwnrd G, WeBtlnko Is in
ft mcnBuro responsible for bringing out tho boBt
bodily qualifications In tho men who uro turned
over to him for inspection.
Snya Examiner Wostlnko:
"Stago fright during tho physlcnl examination
Is ono of tho worst setbacks which tho testa meet.
When a mnn becomes 'IliiBtorod,' knowing thnt
u good Job depends upon hla ovory movement, it
la qutto natural thnt tho bCBt ho known will not
push Itsolf to tho Biufaco. Ilonco It la tho duty
of thu examiner to allay tho fcura of tho applicant
aa much na poBBlblo.
"CoiiBcquontly 1 havo found thnt It holpa men to
do tliolr beat by applying suggestions and occn
Blonally allowing a mnn to lay off for a few mo
menta until ho can compoBo hlmsolf. Whou tho
period of embarrassment passoB, as It Invariably
docs, tho bCBt that Ib In tho applicant la bound
to como out. Tho men tnko tho toBts purely upon
their own morlts and porhapa tho moBt Hovero of
tho weight-lifting requirements Is that or lifting
a 30-pound dumb-boll from a lying posturo, tho
weight being hold back of tho applicant's head.
This la to teat Btomnch muscles. It does not
l .
sorvico law tho Chlcngo pollco, flro and
stationary engineers' depnrtments now
liave a standing eligible list, tho num
ber of names running up into tho hun
dreds, Ilonco neither Chief of Pollco
Shlppey nor Flro Marshal Horan nro
ovor worried nbout securing good, stur
dy men. Thoy nro nlways on hand
ready to report for duty at a mo
ment's notice.
Scarcely a mouth passes but that
new themes of work nro suggested to
tho civil sorvico commission, tried out
and either accopted or rejected. It
was tho civil Bcrvlco body which gavo
tho Impetus to tho movo for an ideal
pollco forco and which eventually ro
suited In tho formation of Chicago's
famous "ber.uty Bquad" of coppers un
der tho direction of MnJ. Iloudet, a
soldier who has seen Bervlca In tho
Cuban campaign In tho Spanl3h-Amorl-enn
war.
MnJ. Iloudet and his "beauty squad"
bend tho list of Chicago pollcomon
ideals nnd tho forco is proud of thorn.
Tho benuty sqund pays moro attontlon
to soldierly tactics than other sections
seem dlfllcult to tho observer, but try It Just
onco and you'll feel thnt passing tho physical test
la fnr from easy."
Mr. Wostlnko Is a nowspapor man on tho staff
of tho Chicago Evening Post nnd hla 20 years In
tho nowspapor .business, part of which was spent
In knocking about In police districts ns u roportor,
tnught him much regarding tho needs of tho de
partment. Iloforo ho entered a nowspaper office,
lio served as a railroad flroman. Tho constitu
tion which that rigorous vocation gavo him,
along with nn onvlablo muaculur development, lias
stood him In good stead In demonstrating tho ubo
of tho tests boforo admiring gatherings of would
bo "cops."
Firemen and stationary engineers aro also In
cluded In tho civil sorvico physical testa and to
day Chief Ilornn of tho flro department la work
ing hard with tho civil aorvlco officials to havo
tho standards raised bo that an even Bturdler
forco mny bo secured to battlo with Chicago con
flagrations. Following la a table, showing what
Ib required In tho way of height and weight bo
foro tho Btrength nnd nglllty testa aro given:
Minimum Clr
ferenco Minimum Mnxltnurn of Chest
HrlBht. WnlKht Velnht .Quiescent.
G foot K Inches 1B0 poundn 190 pounds 1 35 Incite
R " 9 " IMS " 193 " 35V4 "
G " 10 " ICO " 200 " 3(1 "
C " U " 105 " 203 " 37 "
C " " 170 " 215 " 37ft "
(1 " 1 " 175 " 220 " 38
6 " 2 " ISO " .230 " 39 "
U " 3 " 1S5 " 'KB " 40 "
U " 4 " 190 " 240 " 41 '
0 " 5 " 193 " 250 " 42 "
Iloforo tho applicants fnco Physical Exnmlnor
Wcstlnko, thoy aro scrutinized by phyBlcInns nnd
recordB show that Cu per cent, nro rojoctcd. To
show some of tho men's overcBtlmntlon of their
quallllcatlons It la recorded that rocontly 1,500
lllcd applications In a bunch nnd of tbla number
only 370 suoceeded In oniorglng unscathed rrom
tho medtcnl, physical nnd montnl testa.
Mr. Wostlako lays out n tublo of tosfs, showing
tho llgurcB which Indicate meritorious porform
ancca. Tho table:
strtMixth
Capacity of Iiiurs , 290
RtruiiKtli of baok , 215
Htrotmth at Iokh ...... 0(10
HtreiiKih of uppur arm (11. I'.) 10-10
HtivuKili of foro arm fit.' U) cs-irr
I'oolorala ,, 82
Traction pull , , 57
Dumb bolls ,, no
Abdominal muscles to
Adductora w-,
100
Ladder , in,!
Auinty ..14. ; !.!!!!..!!!!! . Im
Condition OCxcellont, Clood. Poor) ....Iciood
Successful applicants must bo nblo to oxpnnd
their lungs nbout four tnches, oxhlblt strength of
bnck, logs, uppor nnd lowor nrm. Then there Ib a
tost of tho poctornl muaclos, n traction pull, tho
lifting of dumb bells weighing CO and 70 pounda,
testing of tho nbdomlnnl muacloa by tho lifting
of n 30-pound weight behind tho head from a
prostrate to n sitting poBturo.
Following thoso teata como ropo nnd Inddor
climbing, which, with tho nglllty oxnmluntlon com
ploto tho phyalcnl work. Then tho appllcnn's
condition la marked "oxcollont," "good," "poor."
Ab n rosult of tho requirements of tho civil
(Copyright, by Shortstory Pub. Co.)
of tho forco
nnd Is per
haps some
thing of an
axporlmont
In tho prop
osition ot In
trod u c 1 n g
111 A . .
tics Tnto the ytaVWL 1UCLZ TfTS
work of tho II nun nwiiiil
pollcoinon.
MnJ. Boudct's chargos perform a manual ol
arms, which, If anything la moro complicated thar
that which tho 80ldler Is compelled to learn. One
of tho prottlost sights lmnglnnblo in tho series ol
evolutions which thoso pollcemon enrry out.
Thoro nro somo tax-paying Chlcagoans who scofl
nt pretty evolutions, but thoy, MaJ. Houdot claims,
nro not of tho fnr-Bcelng clnsB. Ho points out
thnt tho drilling of policemen In this mnnnor
tenches them to handlo themselves with graco and,
onao and makes them nbler In tho duties thoy por
form. Only recently tho beauty squad, about 100 strong,
gavo militiamen of tho First, Illinois Infnntry, sta
tioned at Chicago, n drill exhibition In tho big
First Uoglmont nrmory. So perfect woro tho ovo
lutlona that even tho soldiers wcro awed. Tho po
licemen formed rovolvlng wedges, hollow Bquaros,
flvo-polntcd stars, circles and other Ingenious for
mations, tho perfection of which had tnken them
months to accomplish.
Tho sqund Is formed on tho order of n mllltnrj
company. Thoro is MaJ. Iloudet nt tho hoad, 0
first and socond lloutonnnt nnd tho regulation
numbor of sergeants nnd corporals.
Qulnlng n plnco on tho Chlcngo pollco forco to
day Is perhaps as dlfllcult n fent as tho avorago
man of mlddlo ago would enro to uttompt, nnd for
that reason tho dopnrtment Is composed of the
beat physlquo3 thnt tho city can furnish. Tho same
Is truo of tho flro department, tho efficiency of
which Is evidenced by tho fact thnt during tho
past fiscal your ovory conllngratlon In Chicago
wns put under control boforo tho flro could spread
to adjacent buildings.
Tho medical tost, which firemen aa woll aa po
llcomon undergo, follows:
IS THE nrcSl'lUlNCl MUUMUR clear and distinct
ovor both I.uhkh?
Ib tho olmrncti'r of tho Ucsplrutlou Kull. Knsy and
UtKUl?r?
Aro I hero any Indications of DIpcmiro of the OrKima ot
Iti'tiplrntlon or tliolr AnpomlaKOH? ,.1.4
18 THIS CUAUAt'TKlt of tho TU'iirt'B ncllon Uni
form. Kri'o and Steady?
Aro Its Hounds nnd Uhythtn UcKUlnr unit Normal?
Aro thoro uny Imlicutlonti ot Dluuuao of this OrKun or
of tlio Dlooil VcsselsV
IS TIIK SIOUT Oood?
Ik tho Mi-arlne Oood?
IS THU APPLICANT MibJect to CoiibIi. Kxiioetora
tion. OlltU'Ulty of HroathliiK. or I'alnltutlon?
Alt 13 TIIK, FUNCTIONS of tho 11 rain and Nervous
hi 1
Una tho Hriiln or Hnlnnl Cord ovor boon IUouboiI ?.....
IF '11 IH A1TI,ICA.NT him had any sorious Illnosa or
Injury, stnto .uxprossly what orfoot. If any. Is nor-
i-opiiiuo 111 iiiu ueart. L.unKB, k min
or tho Bkln,
ya or other
Kyoa, Kara,
Abdoinliinl Oruana,
44IIIUO. L-IV...... 1 ,.,.... .......ii,,
ItnH lltinltl-ILIlt ll(l(tl ttltnf.MMufllUi l'n.iilr.i,t.wl
W-VAmV-vS1" ,lvl'W"0C "I SnrBlcnl Oporuiion'?.;."
AUI5 KIUNUS nortnal?
HAH TIIK Al'l'I.ICANT any prcdlsposlilon, cither
hmcdltary or noiiulroil, to any constitutional dla-
...pf.. 118 VliyililBlH, Kurofula. lltipuiimtlam?
1IAU1TH uu of Stlmulanta and Tobwao
It was noon In the Holy City on tho
bank of tho Holy river noon in slum
berous but swarming Ilenares.
Tho hugo nnncondna lay In greasy
nnd fetid folds In tho Tomplo of tho
Divine Snakes.
Tho hideous apes woro asleep near
tho fnnes of tho Sacred Monkeys all
but Qoddo, tho smallest of theso di
vinities. Tho attendant priests, or vnlets, of
these slminn and ophidian godllngs
woro also wrapped In slumbar nnd
llttlo else lying In curloitBly animal
attitudes olther within or Just outsldo
tho cages of tho temploa. Tho most
somnolent of sllcnco prevailed, except
for tho occnslonnl chattor ot Goddo's
teeth for Goddo was 111.
Thero camo along through tho tem
ple yard two Urltlsh officers In un
dress uniform, handsomo, stalwart
men, woll burned by tho Indian sun
and many n brnndy-and-sodn. Thoy
wero cursing tho heat, tho natives, tho
snakes nnd tho suporsltlons of tho
country, nnd ono had Just been con
gratulating tho other on a coming
leave of nbsenco.
"Yes, Tom; I shnll snll from Dom
bay in a fortnight, and n couplo of
months lntor shall bco tho dear old
homo. I'vo boon wondering what sort
of a prosont to tnko nlong for tho cub."
"Why not tnko him n holy mon
key?" laughingly Inquired tho other,
pointing to tho cago they wero about
to pass.
"Not n bad Idea," exclaimed MaJ.
Majorlbanks, halting. "I could hnvo
fun with him on hoard ship, too. Pas
sengers Hko to seo tho antics of a
monkey In tho rigging. Fancy I could
buy ono tolerably tame not given to
biting?"
"Why, yes; theso chaps aro tamo
enough; thoy'ro quite used to their
worshlpors. Get tho kid a monkey
god ho'd bo qulto a treasure."
"Lct'B try It. You speak Hlndostanl
fairly woll. Just seo If ono of theso
priests will sell his god for a reason
able sum. I wouldn't mind going 20
rupees."
Thus adjured, Tom walked up to
Goddo's cngo, and finding a priest
near by, curled up comfortably, kicked
tho sleeper's foot. Tho Hindu slowly
opened his eyes nnd stared sleepily.
In bad but fluent Hlndostanl the Eng
lishman explained. Tho attendant
nroso, looked at both men penetrating
ly, as If to rend their characters, and
then glanced rapidly about tho temple
and tho courtyard. No other waking
priest was visible. Hero was a chance
to mako a small fortune, and then,
perhaps, eBcnpo to somo other part of
India, where ho could havo a wife and
a homo. Besides, ho was not a full
Hedged priest only a neophyte. Tho
crime would not bo so great. Moro
over, tho chances wcro that tho god
would cscapo from his now custodian
and return to tho temple. If ques
tioned too closely, ho could say that
tho Infidel English took Goddo by
forco. No ono would witness tho trans
fer of monoy. Having thought all this
out as rapidly as tho working of tho
oriental Intellect would permit, the
Hindu spoko, with tho slow graco of
gesture peculiar to tho cast:
"I will sell llttlo Goddo to tho groat
soldlor on four conditions: First, that
tho great soldier will never bo cruel
to Goddo, or permit others of tho Eng
llah raco to do harm or offer offonso
to him. Second, that tho great soldlor
will nover toll any ono that ho bought
him from mo, slnco my llfo would be
tho forfeit. Third, that in caso Goddo
should escape and return hither the
sahib shall tnko no stops to rotnko
him. Fourth, that my lord shall pay
mo horo In hand for my god tho sum
of 30 plocos of silver that Is to say,
, 30 rupees."
I Tom, who Interpreted? fancied that
1 a covert gleam quivered a second un
der tho long dark lashes of tho brown
j Hindu oye, but tho silver wns pnld
ovor, nnd It took nearly all In both of
ficers' pockets. Tho priest quickly
1 tied n strong cord to tho monkey's
brass collar, and tho mnjor departed
with hlB prlzo. At tholr quartors God
do was turned over to a Bcrvant, after
Mnj. MnJorlbnnkB had admlnlsterod to
him a good doso of brnndy and qul
nlno, nt tho suggestion ot nn army sur
geon, who had Immediately diagnosed
tho nnlmal's distress as a touch of
fever and chills,
l When tho major took his monkey
on board tho ship Rumchunder, bound
j for London, via tho Cnpo, Goddo's
health was ontlroly restored. His an
tics cortnlnly did amuse tho passen
gers. Ono lndy declared him to bo "a
perfect llttlo love," nnd tho major grow
proud of his possession, nnd took
pains to inform everybody that Goddo
was no common animal, but ono in the
odor of sanctity, and, with tho rever
ence duo to oxalted station, Goddo was
not teased, but petted, and, in fact,
given tho freedom of tho ship.
All wont woll for n month, and thon
tho monkey, having learned tho ropea
and pretty much everything olso
about tho ship dovoloped a disposi
tion moro diabolic than holy, On both
sailors and passengers ho plnyel an
endless variety of prauks, from steal
ing any llttlo artlclo ho could lay piw
upon to slitting garments Into rlbboiB
with a pair ot pilfered scissors. Noth
Ing wns snfo from his predatory ln
Btlnct. Llko tho sou' of a trust In-'
camate, ho solzod everything In slght.1
Ono day it was tho dashing Widow
Mnltland's enso of cosmetics and toilet
mirror. With this, In the presenco of
her rival admirers, Goddo proceeded to)
paint nnd powder, with a series of
coquettish grimaces at tho mirror that
sent tho captuln of tho Rumchunder
and MaJ. Majorlbanks Into fits of
laughter. Tho captain did not laugh,
however, when Goddo ran up Into tho
crosstrces with hla handsomo watch
and chain, and sat thero dangling It
out over tho waves. A sailor got tho
watch, to bo sure, but got It first In
tho shapo of a buffet on tho head that
ruined tho works.
From tho hour tho shining watch
was taken from him, Goddo's temper
seemed to chango, and from being
playful nnd merry his mischief
beenmo malicious. Ono moonlight
night, when young Mnltby and tho
widow had tho after deck all to thorn
solves, and Mnltby was Just at tho
most Interesting point of a story most
Interesting to widows, Goddo crept up
ns nn arm stolo nround tho buxom waist
and almost transfixed tho cont slcovo
with n long pin which ho ran Into tho
back of Mrs. Maitland. Tho lady
leaped, shrieked and fainted, the doc
tor wns called and Goddo skipped
away grinning.
Tho captain ordorcd tho monkey put
In Irons, llko nny ordinary malefactor,
nnd thti sntlor who finally caught htm
in tho rigging swore ho would never
tnko such a biting nnd scratching
ngaln. MnJ. Majorlbanks, now tho
most unpopular porson on board, stood
up for Goddo with. fine- English ob
stinacy, and roinnrkod prophotlcnlly
that no good would como from tying
up a monkey of rank, who when freed,
would rcvongo hlmsolf.
It did seem, especially to tho sail
ors, moro than a coincidence that no
sooner did tho prisoner begin to plno,
nnd refuso food than tho weather,,
which up to this tlmo had been ex
tremely lino, began to bo very rough.,
In tho next few days tho Rumchunder,
hnd several narrow escapes from go
ing to thd bottom, lost a topmast anil
several sails, and scared about every
body on board but tho captain, Maj.
Majorlbanks, who was unacquainted
with fear, nnd Goddo, who from his
place of duranco In tho "brig" could
not seo tho storm.
Sailors nro nothing If not suporstl
tious, and as tho heavy weather con
tinued, ono of them, who hnd hoard a
rumor thnt tho monkey was a Hindu'
god, slyly released him, telling his
shipmates to wntch tho result. As a
mattor of fact, asldo from any specula
tion as to tho cause, Goddo's liberation
was Immediately followed by a sub
sidonco of tho tempost. Tho clouds
cleared awny and tho sun smiled
again. Tho astuto sailor bragged so
much of his wlBdom thnt It. was soon
bruited nbout tho ship that Goddo had I
stilled tho storm. Tho captain swort
at tho sailors' superstition and talked
of putting both tho monkey nnd tho1
man who had freed him back Into
Irons, but MaJ. Majorlbanks grimly 1
romnrked that It was equally foolish
to expect Provldonco to regard with
favor a ship where n poor monkey was '
Ironed llko a common criminal fori
merely following tho bent of his na
ture. Still, tho fact thnt tho release
of Goddo and tho end of tho frightful
storm wero simultaneous did mako an
Impression on eomo of tho paasongors,
who began to regard tho monkoy as
something uncanny.
That la why, Instead of becoming
tho pot of n llttlo English boy, Goddo
found a spaclovtB and poncoful cago In
n renowned zoological garden, labeled:
"Goddo, the Holy Monkoy."
BY WAY OF EXPERIMENT.
Bumptious- Clerk Was to Consider
Himself Dead for a Time.
Not long ago thero was a certain
salesman In a dry-goods shop of an
Ohio city who wns habitually observ
ing to his fellow clerks that tho con
corn would find It rather dlfllcult to
get along without him. Thoso remarks
coming to tho ear of tho senior part
ner of tho firm, ho decided to Inter
view IiIb clork concerning thorn.
"Mr. Spotts," said tho partnor, with
a grim smile, "nlthough you hnvo not
provod to bo our most offlclent clerk,
yet wo havo appreciated such sorvico
as you havo condescended to render
us during tho Intervnls when you wore
not expatiating on your own merits.
Now wo havo lately heard it said that
If you woro to dio tho business would
hnvo somo troublo In surviving the
loss. This has worried us a good
deal, for you, llko nil of us, aro liable
to drop off at nny moment.
"For this renson, therefore, wo have
concluded, for our pence of mind, tc
experiment while all ot us aro In good
health, In order that wo may nscertnlc
whether tho Arm enn benr up undei
your loss. You will accordingly con
slder yourself dead for tho period oi
ono month, nnd wo will try to set
whether wo enn got nlong without yoi
for that length of tlmo." Hnrpor't
Weekly.