THE ALLIANCE HERALD. TUESDAY, DECEMBER 13, 1921.
TIIRED
I
RANDOM SHOTS
1
tiser appeals to prospective purchasers
of perlume, listing a number of brands
in wonts that ai-e artful enough to
convince the sallowest kid in the world
that she'll be a Cleo de M erode in her
WHO'S TO BE THK JUDGE? younjr rnans eyes if he pets tust one
,.;." r' j "Iv , tV iv sonanty. Kead this immortal bunk:
P1 JftlZf Sri? ' . "L'oWan-The jncomparahle-the
' t." Z v.l -Tir 7 vl xavonte true I'arisienne the su
preme frafrranoe of the woman of the
remember her at Christmas, buy her
a box of Tow-Kow silk hose. No one
1 1 a. f i e a a ii a l
i.Kes vne im 01 coiwn or yie Bi.cners , temperament."
n wool and few care re to Ro hose- Wherewi another is
it?, fo iuw-muvs im me uni ana
pive you a quality any good Judjre can
tell in the dark. They are as welcome
in a women's wardrpbe as a pumpkin n
Pie to tne sint or a tramp, ine elastic Thft most expensive bottle bears
tops can b rolled With success or rar- (iescriptlon: .'Egyptian nights,
tered withoU injury. May our ex-, incense purp,e si)ks Rnd BtranRe
sticmonHraie goou pvinu oi j jewels the odour of cigarettes dies in
tins luiiiuua iiupc i i r ,
world exquisite, imperious, luxurious
"transfused
sijrhs of roses on the southern slopes
of France essence of women with
honey colored hair and eyes of laugh-
Lincon is stapinjc a campaijrn to
'"Sell Lincoln to Lincoln," and one of
the features last Saturday was a public
program at wich twenty youngsters
played simultaneously on ten pianos.
How on earth could anyone sell any
thing to anybody in all that noise?
Must liave sounded something like
ladies' sewing circle.
THREE LIES FOR TODAY
'"As good as new." '
"We'd love to have you call again."
"Painless dentistry. "
The Chadron Journal reprints our
more r less caustic comments anent
the amateur poetry of Leo Lloyd of
that city, under the heading: "Don't
Xet This Discourage You, Leo." No
chance! When a home grown poet is
that rotten, the only thing you can
-discourage him with ia a crowbar.
As an esteemed exchange remarks,
some movies are more to be pitied
than censored.
Old story: A boy fell In a mudhole
:and happened to be wearing his new
isuit. 1 Arriving home his mother said :
'George, how on earth did you get so
-dirty?" "Fell In the mud," was the
laconic reply. "And with your-new
pants on, too?" "Yes," was son's an
swer, "didn't have time to take 'em
off."
The Jeremiah of the Nebraska City
Tress laments thusly: "Life is a funny
proposition after all. One day we have
a lot of bones for the dog; the next
lay wc have no dog.
One of the newsies, reading over the
advertisement for "The Four Horse
men " declared that he knew who the
horsemen were. "The only riders in
the movies," he said, "are Bill Hart,
. Buck Jones, Art Acord and Tom Mix.
THE NEW LITERATURE.
"The Shiek" may be hot stuff for
the flappers and the old dames who
.have to rely mainly on memory for the
"wallop, but to find real imaginative
literature, we have to turn to the ad
vertising columns. A Chicago adver
perfume for the deeply red haired
woman."
Or, if you prefer, there is Styx,
"mysterious, inscrutable the lasting
fragrance of love alter death expres
sing palely black haired women, calm-
eyed under sweeping brows."
And u none of these appeals, try
Jasmin, "pale fragile petals haunting
as old memories at twilight expres
sing the woman of deep eyes of
dreams." .
Mark our words, the time will come
when some ad writer will describe
Jockey Club in words like that, and
one of his disappointed customers
will kill him.
THE AMEN CORNER
Amen to this wail from the succes
sor to the illustrious B. L. T.! "As
for lettuce salad, we have been trying
to forgive and forget for a number of
years. It can t be done. 1 he reason is
that it can't be dodged. It is aa Inevit
able as death and taxes. It has more
disguises than Nick Carter and it lies
in wait for its quarry in every restau
rant, home, and hotel in the land.
TODAY'S BEST STORY.
A Long Island bachelor was show
ing a friend from New York over his
estate. When they reached the sheep
fold the woolly inmates, catching sight
of their master, came bleating to the
cate.
"See how these innocent creatures
love me, Harry?" asked the land
lolder.
"Love nothingl" chortled the city
man. "They come to you because
they're hungry and they think you're
iroinsr to feed them."
"Harry," replied the other solemnly,
"when you have reached a certain age
that passes for love.
INTIMATE GLIMPSES.
The topic for discussion today is the
hear tthrobs of the most romantic lad
who ever scrubbed a Dress or pretend
ed to sweep a floor by simply pushing
a broom over the edees. Picture, if
you will, a handsome qouth with the
soubriquet of "Monkey," clue possibly
to facial characteristics or certain
Eiminn mnnnprisms.
This handsome youth has never, in
It Depends On How:
You
Handle the3?ape
Chicago Kahn Bros,
make my clothes in
this big. daylight
building in Chicago
and their guarantee
backs mine.
The measuring of a suit is the first and
one of the most important steps. After
that comes right cutting, and good tailor
tng.. ;
tlahdline the tape is where' I come in on
.,.!' 1.: " 1 V 1 I. ...
V ii . w a., i. : -i
Cutely correct I've made a study of it.
V 'guarantee long wear perfect fit and a
Nptyle that is right If you do not get all of
thi'&e in a suit of clothes which you order
f rear me, I will not let you keep it. , , 1
V. :
Let Me Tape You!
Come in now, and talk over', that suit for
Fall and Winter. You can, at, least, look
over the patterns I have. i '
And, you can take my word for it that you
ought not to order any suit without seeing
all the different kinds of cloths that are in
the complete Chicago Kahn Bros'. line this
Fall. -
You will find here just the fabric to suit
your taste and at prices that fit your
pocket book
all his experience, had a date with a
girl. His class in high schjol and tin
other staged a skating party. It i
. I f J iV-
nvceiuwry, 10 ue on uie ic it in ine
swim, whichever expression you pre
fer, to have a damsel on 'Jiese tca
sions. But, in order to have a dam: el,
it is necessary to gain her cement.
And this lad lacked the courage.
The first hints came in the form if
conversations. The bookkeeper was
asked, "Did you ever have a date?"
The bookkeeper blushingly acknowl
edged the fact that he had been out in
feminine company. "You lucky dog,"
was the reply. "How do you get m7"
The answer was, of course, "By ask
ing. "And how do you ask? came
the next question from the agonir.ee!
youth. "Telephones the easiest, wns
the good advice that followed. '
Then came twenty minutes of mak
ing up the mind, accompanied bv l.7.y
spells, heart fluttering and blushes
that spread clear down the back. The
moment came. Central got the num
ber. The bookkeeper supported the
boy'B head. Someone on the other end
took down the receiver. You could
see the lad's heart sinking tow ird his
boots. " Is this you, Mablei he s.-ud,
tremulously, "Can I " but this was
the end. A sweet voice at the other
end said, "Mable isnt in right row."
The bookkeeper took the bro m and
swept the remains out under the cold
water faucet. The party came iiext
night. Wonder who Mable accom
panied? We know one youth who
stayed at home. .
ABE MART1N II.
"There is a good deal of reason for
hope that the disarmament conference
will nip the dogs of war in the bud,"
said Duke Barrytone last evenin'.
"True, when a high-class carpenter
accidentally lets a nail fall, he don't
stop to Dick it up: but it don't foller
that when a feller drops a nail and lets
it go, we thereby proves himself to be
a good carpenter," said Napoleon
Muzzy, I forgit just when.
Said Grandpop Gundy, this mornin',
"When I'm going out of a business
place and try to pull the door to, but
find one who i follering has took hold
without speakin' to me, it makes me
so mad I wish I was as young as I
used to be."
rural"romance.
(Selected)
We stood at the gate as the sun went
down
Behind the hill at the close of day;
Her look was pensive; her eyes were
brown,
Her breath was sweet as the new
mown hay.
For out of the west the last sunshine
Fell lightly on her golden hair;
Her tender eyes looked straight in
mine,
And a look of perfect trust was there.
I see her enclosed in the sunlight flood,
I see her; peacefully standing now; .
Peacefully standing and chewing her
cud,
As I rubbed her ears that Jersey
cow.
$25 : $30 : $35
Made to Your Measure
KEEP-UrNEAT
CLEANERS and TAILORS
and
Up
Tonieht at thA . Imnerial "The
Sheik" will be shown for the second
time. The production, drew a record
audience last night, arid it'ds expected
to be an even greater .attraction this
evening. It a the story of X proud and
haughty Lnghsh girl, courted by an
Amh. whn. nftpp rniilsiro him tim
and again, finds herself ki&iajned and
A O. . TL ! A
bv i bis, mercy. oirunge u it may
seem, and not at all in line witl. most
of these productions, where the heroine
is rescued at the last minute, , the
damsel discovers that she is in love
with the man who t has stolen he1.
Beautiful Agnes Ayres, heroine to
-The Affairs of Anatol" the "Forbid
den Fruit," and - Rudolph Valentino,
who scored heavily in "The Four
Horsemen," are the leading characters.
"The Sheik" reaches the top-notch of
romantic motion pictures. ,
"Dangerous Business," starring Con-
hie Talmadge, is the Wednesday feat
tire. The play' is a double bed farce
with, a number of exciting situations.
It is different than the usual run of
photoplays inasmuch as in the big
scene in which the supposed "hus
band" orders his bride to undress and
go to bei in their bridal suite she is
forced toobey- through stress of cir
cumstances, and no third party breaks
down the dtor and rescues the unwed
girl in tho ntck of time, as has always
heretofore ha-ppened in the fifth reel.
The audience positively gasps at this
new and daringsituatfon. It is not a
play that is supposed to convey a mes
sage, or encompass a vital idea, but the
climax of this umommon plot is too
good to spoil in thk telling. ' .
"His Greatest Sacrifice." with Wil
liam Farnum. is scheonled for Thurs
day. This play is a dumestic drnma
that is ciiuclc lull 01 naman interest.
A young wife renounces her husband
and child in her hectic pursuit of an
operatic career. Her hutbjid bhobu
the impresario, bcaus he tinks him
bis wife's lover. The husbanX is con
victed of second degree murW; the
wife sails for Paris expecting rV have
all oDeratic Euroue at her feet. For
many years her dream is realizedUmt
there comes a day when she finds tyat
as nhe herself. sunDlanted a woitnn
who was no lonirer young, so she is.
tnm is to be supplanted by a younger
singer. She returns to her native ltna i
to search for the child and husband
that she so willingly tsacriftced to her
.'nordinate ambition years before. She
lU eates the child, now grown to woni-
an.Vot, but is repudiated Dy ner uron
residing her Identity. Mr. Farnura's
work js always convincing. The sup
iort;fcT cjt includes Evelyn G reel y.
It is A oleasuie to see this gifted
1 player JLi a picture.
It mi" be embarrasing to the
'guests afc.l'ia summer hoUls to have
to give th. tilers to college girl wait
ers who kdiAVhow to pronounce th
" W
,m Christmas CW
hm Suggestions' i
ifm FANCY XMAS JENVELRY (fiVW
tlt STATIONERY Diamond flings $10 up
Pm ' Wrist Watches $10 up Z
r WAr 50c t0 3'50 Diamond Brooches, . A
wfyP Per Box. at $10 up Ml
nlM ' M
LIGGETT'S CANDY Ivory Toilet Goods. If
' v in fancy Xmas boxes , Manicure Set, $2.50 up $ftty
yjp 50c v $4.00 Toilet Sets, $4.50 up 1 wJm !
e 1 -. w
!'Jv LEATHER GOODS KARESS TOILET
1 ?T1SV - - - .a COMBINATIONS S?4
' Hand Tooled Leather 4 ?1S
f tfif'A Purses $5 to $33 Face Powder, ToUet
Document Cases, ' Water, Etc. ttf
V at $10 to $23 $9.00 to $15.00 per set fdC
i Y We have many other beautiful gifts that will instantly
recommend themselves to you. Gift selection is made easier ,t.,
when you sec our complete lines. ( H
v . HOLSTEN'S a ..
K . a
. 8
i vv
VOLLAND BOOKS ARE
eal Christmas Gifts For
Children
HAPPY, NATURE and FAIRY BOOKS
$1.35
laggedy Ann
Raggedy Andy
TVTurned Intos "1
Whi" Away On a Sunbeam. .
$2.50
Raggedy Ann Doll
Raggedy Andy Doll
Little Brown Bear
is:ki
V 7T.
75c
60c
d it xt t v t r axr CJ
n o u xi x uu vfiv o
Eddie Ephant
Tales of Little Dogs
Little Brtj :vn Bear !
Bam, Bamock
Rainbow Bridge
JollyOld Shadow Man
Tales of Johnny Mouse
Betty, Bobby afd Bubbles
Tale of a Whale
$1.50 Volland Mother Goose. Y
si.OO Christmas Story "
I $2.00 Teenie Weenie Mother (Goosey ' '
I $2.00 Down 'the River With theTeeme
Player Pianos, Phonogifalins, Victor Records, Player Rolls, Sheet
liyic aiiu oiiiuii iiiusitai
CHRISTIMAS SHOPPING NOW ,
75c
The Tale of the Muley Cow
The Tale of Miss Kitty Cat
Tale of Pony Twinkleheels
Tales of Turkey Proudfoot
The Tale of Old Dog Spot
Golden Friendship Books
Some One to Care
Just You
Through All the Years
Each in His Own Tongue
Always Christmas
The Value of a Smile
DOLOUR
Miann Music & Art Company
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