TOUR
THE ALLIANCE HERALD, FRIDAY. FEBIUrAHY 11. 1021
TAXI
An
Adventure
Romance
By George Afinew Chamberlain
Ou;r.f Ilk 1M Hoiib Mairlti tonptaf
Tiich te'nalnf -"luT? JTf TifiiTt. Tm
aglne lirr t'X-i i hi 'lit when Mr. Mil
jxihH called by iiiHlntiiiMit iinil re
tailed word for vinl the following cm
versntlmi wliltii !, Inn) pnrtlripnted In
that very timrnliig with MIhh MikIk'i'
Van Tellh-r of I'jiiwt Ninth Mie.-t:
"Oh, Mr. Mllyuns, nre you doing nil
that HdvcrtlMlriK for Hobby Itiuidolph?"
"Yen, Mndp; 1 certainly nrn, and If
It doesn't bear fruit pretty noon I'll
have to K've up tol'iirco."
"Are yon advertising for his own
food? 1 mean In It Important to Mm
not to you for you to find him?
Would lie lie really and truly glad to
fc found even nciilnst hi will?"; ,
"Er yes er It In or he would
r If he iHn't sixteen kinds Of a fool.
I think I caught them nil, my dear,
hut it I left any out, please repeat."
"Yes," admitted the lady questlon
tnark; "your legal mind answered them
tUL Now tell me Just your human Keif
it you were In ISohhy'a place, would
jou want to lo found by you for the
purpose that you want to find blm
for?"
Mr. Mllyuns did not pretend for one
eroud that he did not understand the
preposterously worded query.
"You bet I would!" he answered
promptly and emphatically. "Now tell
m what you've Rot up your aleeve.
Flease, Madge; that's a dear girl I If
yu only knew how I'm worried seven
times a day "
"I'm trying to tell you," broke In
Miss Van Tel Her, "hut you talk so
.asncn I can't Ret In anywhere. Last
atfght. a taxi brought me home from
r from a drive, and the rahruan was
Bobby, looking simply stunning In one
f those awfully high-collared, khaki,
waist -effect woolly coats, chauffeur's
ap, tan puttees, boots, and all"
"Yes. yea," Interrupted Mr. Mllyuns;
J know now Just how he looked. What
was the license-number of the car, and
which company did It belongn
A long pause.
Why. I didn't notice."
"Thanks awfully, my dear."
Sound of hanging up the receiver.
8o there you are," aald Mr. Mltyun
the - very much etclted Pamela.
We've got this far and, by a fluke en
tirely unconnected with the twenty-two
afleuths I have been pensioning In ad
vance of their lifelong service, Hubert
M driving one of the sixty-three thou
sand taxlcahs that Infest the streets
of New York." t
"I'oor dear!" said Pamela, tears rls
tng to h'.T adorable eyes. Then she dls
aslKsed Mr. Mllyuns, who would gladly
have lingered. " have to git out now.
Tin so sorry, but thank you very, very
touch."
Tnn't I itron you wherever you're
fotTig?" aslveil the. very huinuii mind of
the lending Ifnl authority on corpora
tion hedge-rows uml byways.
"Oh, no," kiiIiI Pamela, translucent
as loe If. If; " Klnll go In taxis."
How iniih.v vulgnr'-velilcles for hire
were bl"sii by the transient presence
f Mis Tlmi n:o!i during the next seven
hours U n t'uiHer of iiiss uiiih:imtics
and const -qiienlly luiienlh Ihe ken of
n Intelligence (hut can chat along
bout nice ih'n-s lie I'nine'a m il oh.
art Ititmlnli b for ure pleasure ami
fnhnequeiitly sell th.' remarks for cold
Cash. Five minutes to spot a lively
Cb, five minim to tlclret the driver
and pile him on the discard, two more
to find her purse, three more to look
tnnocent; then stiy-t all over again.
Divide seven times sixty minutes by
all that, and you've got her number.
Let us leuve the statistical tleml and
pass on to seven o'clock of the near
Christmas evening when Miss Thorn
ton was momentarily out of a cab
and strolling down the slope of the
hump In West Fifty-seventh street A
mushy snow-rain had Just begun to
fall, giving anyone with the price a
plendld excuse for taking a cub any
where for anywhere. He fore the portal
mt the Great Northern Lights squatted
four taxis In a line. In the driver's
aeat of the rearmost of these, and con
aequently the last on the rank, a lank
human being was burled In an enor
mous turued-up collar roofed by a
chauffeur's cap set, at an angle of
lumber.
Pamela, the very moment her eyes
fell on the recumbent figure, felt that
abort quick leap of the blood In her
veins which la ordinarily termed a
hunch." She longed to step forward
and raise the veiling headgear, but ahe
dared not, for not only was the hotel
starter on the Job but also the window
hades of the Poppy club next door
were still elevated by apeclul request,
owing to the slippery state of the aide
walk In conjunct km with the home
ward bound stream of dress-models.
Aa a consequence, she was necessar
ily content with opening the cur door
for herself and stepping In. The starter
politely begged her to pass to the tax:
t the head of the rank and Just as
politely she Informed him that her feet
were wet enough aa It was. Iu the
meantime, even her light weight on
the running-board had startled the
driver Into wakefulness and, without
going through any motions, be bad
heard the unforgettable tones of her
Toice -. .-
i ne iii'ler sl.ie.-'ed Ms ahou'ders.
'larked it .-n Bib! 'n Fifty ninth
'tree? ami 'tl' flTered to "trim her
iv r for h!i i.' Tin drMer In id trein
'.i'ng hiiinl- i'ii e 'eel S' d "nuHou
,y l.- v h'tnM if v ti Mitlnj por
tion without dWurbtn the shM!r.f
Bugle of his cup. Far from his trou
bled mind were thought of snow, the
slush ami skidding. He threw In his
clutch, started her with a Jerk, round
ed the cab III front successfully, skid
ded nilgliilly t'lcrciifter. straightened
her out, skidded ognln, and crashed,
with a great ill'"'rinir of spokes.
6he Longed to Step Forward and
Raise the Veiling Headgear.
broadside front on the curb directly
before the delighted wlndowa of the
Poppy club.
Nothing, would have happened to
Miss Thornton had she been sitting
back In a ladylike manner, hut at the
moment of the cah'a collision with the
Imperturbable curb, she was otherwise
occupied ; In short, the glass being a
bit frosted, she was standing up and
trying to peek through the speaking
Blot As a consequence, when the door
flew open with the shock, she also flew
and volplaned to a landing on hands
and knees In the very middle of the
very wide sidewalk.
With a cry of, "Oh. mlssP the
driver sprang toward her. but when,
still on hands and knees, she looked tip
and gasped, "Oh, Randy Mr. Ran
dolph!" he turned and fled down the
bill.
'Til! You Slim HerveyP yelled the
starter. . "Come hack here an' sign up
for the Junk I"
In the meantime, which wasn't
much more tnsn the twinkling of an
eje. three perennial near-youths
dashed down the steps of the Poppy
club to the assistance of the loveliest
trouble that had ever sent out an 8
O. S. signal In the face of ready help
to the falling. Individually and col
lectively, they raised the curly-haired
vision to Its feet.
"It wai Mr. Kandolph." gasped the
nmlilen, I., evident distress, "and I've
been looking for blm for weeks."
"Not Hobby!" exclaimed Mr. Near
ton. "Not llerv!" etnenln'ed Mr. Verrles
"Not Kiinilv!" Interjected Mr. Berry
Pamela noilded three times, hut her
eyes failed to show wonder. Nowadays
eeryboilv she ran Into weemed to
know everybody she knew by his first
mi me.
"Kxcuse me," sa'd Mr. Nenrton. In
tent on getting there first with a re
mnrk nny remark ; "does he owe yon
money, too?"
Tie effect vn electrical. Miss
Thornton assumed a freezing dignity.
Khe flved Mr. Nearton with steady
eyes.
'"How miifh does Mr. Randolph owe
you?" sj'e nsled.
"Only tw-twenty," babbled Mr. Near
ton. "Well, here It is." said Pamela, draw
ing a yellowback from her chatelaine
and thrusting It Into Mr. Nearton'a
nerveless hnnd. "I happen to owe Mr.
Randolph a great deal more than that."
Wherewith she turned and made for
the corner and the nearest telephone
booth.
Pamela was short of breath when
she reached the telephone, hut Bhe
managed to get Xtr. Mllyuns' residence
on the wire and learned that he was
detained at the office. She called up
that safe den of the wo 'd-be undis
turbed and connected with a new and
strange drawl.
"You've got the wrong number, lady.
This Mr. Mllyuns went home early to
celebrate his silver wedding."
"Will you put nie through to Mr.
Borden Mllyuns." asked Pamela, In a
ugar-sweet voice, "or do yon really
want to start looklnsr for another Job?"
"How do I know you know hlro
Miss Ilurry, did you say? The offlce
boy ain't here, se I can't ask him.
Leave me your number, an I'll have
him call you." .
"Know html" gulped Pamela. In a
rage. "Why. Tve k-klssed him!"
"Kissed Mr. Mllyuns I" responded
th voice, taking sudden notice. "Well,
dearie, why didn't yon sny so? I
thought you waa one of them high
brow dames. If if a matter of klssln
ao88 over the wire, why Just you go
in it. I wont listen oh, no r
And a moment later, Pamela, In a
streamline hodyt
"Oh. Mr. MIlyuM, this la Pamela
and I've found hlmt , , , Yea; Randy
Mr. Randolph. ... No; he got away !
, . . Yes. He's going under the name
of Slim Hervey and he was driving the
Ullage .Ti!Lcoimi?ny's Nq, JS, ajid
BURYING
Last weeV the Minneapolis rhnr'ior of ro"-"""""- u,i -
funeral en masse. Strange to say, it was an occasion of general
rejoicing, for the corpse waa "Georjre." It seems the individual mem
bers had delegated their whole responsibility to George and George
had failed. The chamber of commerce waa rapidly going to tha
iienmition bow-wows, so a few live ones decided to kill the strangely
ileVniiuent brother and force each member to take up his Bhare of the
burdens Of the organization.
H is a very easy matter to apply this little incident to Alliance.
For the past year, everybody has complained of the city government,
with and without reason. - The whole system was said to be wrong,
and nothing would do but a change of form. It was urged that a city
manager would do everything the old style system failed to do, even
to lowering the taxes and magically converting the septic tank into a
perfume factory.
Certain respected and influential citizens backed this change with
considerable zeal and we are to try out the city manager plan.
Now comes the analogy with the Minneapolis chamber of com
merce. A legal requirement of the city manager form of government
is a council composed of five men. Every day or bo it is rumored that
tome of the strong supporters of the change will run for councilman,
and later the rumor is denied. "Let George Do It," or words to
that elTect.
The "Let George Do It" attitude is, in a large measure, responsible
for the faults of the present city government, and unless there is a
change of heart the new, or city manager lonii, will l.iii he.r ui a.i
the ills of "Lotting George Do It."
he smashed It on lhe curb Just In Trur"
of that horrid Poj py club, and wher
he saw nie. be ran: . . . Oh. you wf
pet .him. 'von't yiit? P'e-'.se burr
And now. if you'll himr ip. I have
few words to siiy tribal new
phone girl of yours. . . . Oh, no t yo
needn't tell her; I can -feel her suggln
on the wire. . . . Oh, will you? Oi
thank you! It isn't as If sue dldn :
I deserve It."
(Continued in Next Issue)
Trv one of those Oil Manicures
at McVicker's Ueauty Parlor. 22
REGULAR JOB
"And what might your work have
been during the late war?" asked an
old lady visiting the Atlantic fleet as
it lay at anchor in the Hudson.
"Ma'am," replied the gob wearily, "I
worked on a submarine, and every
time they wanted to dive I'd run fori
ward anil tip 'er up." American Le
gion Weekly.
MUCH AFFECTED
"Come, now! Don't look so miser
.ble!" said a Tumlinville photographer.
"Just pretend in your own mind that
you are going to get married tomor
rom." "Dad-burn the dad-burn luck," re
turned the Arkansas aitter. "That's
precisely what I am going to!" Kan
sas City Star.
RING REPARTEE
Jr-
"Ah shuah does pity yop,"-naid a
colored pugilist to his opponent as
they squared off. "Ah was bohn wif
box in gloves on.
"Mavbe vo' was." retorted th other;
"an ah reckon you're goin to die de
same way." Boston Transcript.
AND THEN THE ROW STARTED
"Do you think that young man good
enough to marry our daughter?"
asked the mother.
"I guess so," replied the father.
"You know your folks used to say I
wasn't good enough for you."
"I known. But my folks were right
about it." Detroit Free Press.
AN EXPERIENCED PRINTER
"Our new company is capitalized at
$50,000,000."
"Great, let me see your prospectus."
"Oh, we haven't got out a prospec
tus yet. The confounded printer wants
his pay in advance." Mobile Register.
TAKING NO CHANCES
Browne "What caused you to with
draw all of your money in the Fleet
foot hank?"
Town --"Every time I entered to
make a deposit I found the cashier
with his hat on." Judge.
EFFICIENCY ON THE FARM
Cow: "Can you beat it? There's
so much system around here now that
they file me in the barn under the
letter C." ' ...
Hen: "Yes, I have my troubles with
efficiency, too. They've put a rubber
stamp in my nest so I can date my
eggs two weeks ahead."
TRUE CELEBRITY
A short whi1ea7ter Trvir, S. Cobb
had visited the trenches back in 1918.
two soldiers were discussing the event.
"He's a mighty well-known man,
said one. ''They've even named a cigar
afTe""agreed the other, "and there's
a good old pipe called after htm, too.
k FATAL TRUST
"Hear poor old Jones is dead. How
n read ninety-eight cigarette rnxaa
nwu4uct was the best in the mantei,
found out which told the truth.
Come in at your earliest con
renlence to see our offering of
Ladles New Spring Apparel.
The Fashion Shop. 22
For results a wan ad in the Herald
"GKORGK"
TIMELY TOPICS
The new f;ul of tellinir clmr:ictpr hi
the hair is not very effective in bald
head row.
Gentlemen who ate never elected
President are saved the worry. of mak
ing cabinets.
Hungary wants a king. Some pco
pie, curiously, cannot get enough' o!
a bad thing. .; '. -A
A woman's idea of getting what she
wants is, "If at first you don't succeed,
cry, cry again." .
Prevailing feminine fashions show
that the old effort to make extremes
meet is still on.
It gives an American girl almost as
much trouble to get rid of a duke as
it does to get one.
What seems to worry the profiteers
most is how to keep their wolf at
somebody else's door.
Every time the fuel situation gets
acute the weather man shows a dis
position to be helpful
Ponzi must spend five years in
prison, but there will be a new crop
in 1925. Arkansas Gazette.
There is considerable underground
whisky traffic and many of its victims
are being put under ground.
This fall's cider crop may help the
back - to - the - farm movement next
spring.
One way to instruct some women
how to vote is to tell them how their
husbands voted.
It is wiser to kecji the coal in the
parlor than to give the cellar key to
the furnace man. , :
Orange lips as worn by French wo
men will never become popular with
the women of the Emerald isle.
The only textbook change school
children will really approve is to
shorten the number of pages.
Fond mothers are now dreaming of
the davs when their daughters as well
as their sons may be president.
Wood alcohol continues to, press
closely behind speeding motor cars
for first place in the casualty league.
That suggested "school for wives"
brings the counterproposal that there
be also a kindergarten for husbands.
For getting results with thrills,
smoking over a powder barrel seems
to have nothing on guarding a cache
of "hooch."
The authorities have not yet per
fected facilities for making the pay
ment of taxes as punctual as the pay
ment of rent.
There are a lot of women who com
plain about the cost of footwear who
wduldn't like to see the high heels
lower.
Down in Mexico they have arrested
the governor of Tabasco for getting
hot while pickled and shooting up the
town.
Knickerbockers are reported as
coming back into style for men, and
some men we know won't have a leg
to stand on.
Th ceneral reductions in men's
clothing prices should have a tend
ency to keep many from going entirely
back to nature.
A movement Is on foot to abolish
tav mo ale Mothinc is so well adapted
to bring about the general harmony;
so much desired.
Boxinc cloves mav do as a part of
the modern school equipment, but we
... . t a
fear thev will never ouite Buppiam
teacher's ruler and pointer.
Th rlht of women to occupy the
pulpit has been recognized in Switzer
land T wnnt strike BTlvbodT BS a
Swiss movement for shorter sermons.
FASHIONS
5MB l e
n vi
1 w V
r
I'm not as young at you may think; I'm quite an antiquated gink, and I
recall that long ago the ladici blew their husbands' dough on dresses half a
vard too long lo wear 'em shorter would be wrong. When women took
a little hike, the fat and slim ones looked alike; they used to hide the lam
divine, the witching curve and graceful line. At dances women ued to
show the chin and half an inch below, but that was where they drew -he
line, and all us fellows thought it fine. Then things began to change a bit ;
s-.me showed their shoes just think of it I And all the narrow minded
ones got out their gossip shooting guns and called them hussies even worte
and said such dressing was a curse. Now. look at hall the girls ycu
meet; they're half undressed when on the street, and no one gasps at pretty
knees, because the fashion so decrees. It's getting so that chorus girls have
little else to shed but curls if thoy are on the job to beat the hu.-sies floating on i
the street. If they'd go back, say. fifty years, and dress up sol'd -to the
ears, the novelty of such a show would cause a lot of folks to go; at least,
'twould be a big surprise, and how 'twould ease our tired eyes.
With this issue, The Imperial News,
which is printed in The Herald office,
s enlarged in size and circulation,
'rorri now on double- the number oi
copies will be printed, and they will
be distributed in both the east . and
west sections of the city.
Wanted to buy both your fat
and stock hogs. O'Bannon and
Neuswanger. Phone 71. '.18tf
There were eight from Alliance who
attended the revival meetings at Bay
ard Tuesday evening, which are being
conducted by L L Combers of Bak-
ersfield, Cal. Those in attendance
were Rev. and Mrs. S. J. Epler, Mes
darnes Jennie Reed, A. J. Cole, H. O.
Condit, H. Johnson, Clara Tipple, W.
A. McKune.
Mrs. H. C. Reynolds of Sterling,
Colo., has been visiting her son, A. 11.
Reynolds of this city, bhe expects
to return home Sunday.
DR. BOWMANoffice in Firsi
National Bank Building. 8tl
H. Hirst of the Fourth Street mar
ket, went to Lincoln on a business trip
last Tuesday. He expects to return
tomorrow.
Laird Druery who has an infection
of the foot caused from stepping on
a nail three weeks ago, is doing nicely.
Joe and Jacob Jeffers of south Alli
ance have both been quite ill but are
improving nicely at present.
Some people send off hundreds of
miles to buy articles at mail-order
houses, and then they are mad be
cause local stores do not carry missing
parts when the thing breaks -fiown.
Holly Chieftain.
New Rooms
from Old Spaces
m
Ton oajrf expect Bemver
Board remits unlet thie
trede ' murk ie on the
beck of the board you buy
Dierk's Lumber & Coal Co.
FRED HARGARTEN, Manager.
Air Cooled Spark Plugs
ARE IN A CLASS BY THEMSELVES
Has a heavy ventilated copper electrode tipped with silver Two
of the beet conductors known to science.
Carries a heavy ribbon spark. Does not feather off as it does on
a small steel electrode.
Produces a Hot Spark and a strong explosion which keeps plug
and cylinders free from soot and carbon, and more miles to the irallon
of gas.
I want a live agent in every town in Western Nebraska, or would
consider county agents. For particulars address i
W. E. CUTTS
Alliance, Nebraska.
Distributor for Western Nebraska.
IT
There is much discussion a3 to '
whether prevailing styles are immod
est; but there seems to be unanimous
masculine agreement that they are ex
pensive. .
i t
Saturday
Specials
35c Cough Syrup 0A
2 for jDC
$1.25 Toilet Water 0
2 for ylJS)
35c Can Cocoa OV
2 for 00C
$1.25 One-pound box of
Guth's Chocolates f1 )
2 for $10
78c Cans Grape Jam 7ft
2 for iSfi
Holsten's
Why waste valuablt attic space that
might easily be converted into livablo
rooms? A few panels of Beaver Board,
hammer, saw, and nails, and the work
is don a quick, clean, permanent job
that will quicklv pay for itself in added
rent. '
Besides Beaver Board for better walls
and ceilings we carry a complete line of
building materials, and can supply you
with anything in lumber. There's no.
better time to talk over your building or
remodeling plans than now. Come in
and get acquainted.
i
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