THE ALLIANCE IIKRALD, ALLIANCE, NEBRASKA, DKCKMI1ER 2, 1919
rAOEVEiifciB'
r
What Does Pay Day
Mean to You?
Is it a day where you have to distribute all of your
income on over-due bills or does it present an oppor
tunity to add something to your Savings Account?
To thousands of depositors in savings banks it means
this opportunity.
Why don't you join them and set aside a certain
percentage of your pay check for a Savings Account just
,the same as you would for any obligation you have to
meett
You need not make it a large portion of your salary.
The feature of prime importance in this system is the
Regularity. Don't allow ordinary incidentals to inter
rupt this routine of saving. This is what makes the totals
large.
We will be more than pleased to assist you to saving.
We offer you all the conveniences of modern banking
methods, coupled with prompt, painstaking and cour
teous service.
The First State Bank
The Only Bank in Alliance That Offers Its
Depositors Protection
DR. JAMES P. MAXFIELD
DENTIST
Special Attention Paid to Oral
Hygiene and Diseases of the Mouth
X-Ray Diagnosis
Gas and Anesthetics Administered
Lady Assistant
Clean Teeth Never Decay
Opera House Block Telephone 525
fM ASP ffr
THE MODERN
WAY
Have your clothes Pressed on a
Hoffman Steam Pressing Machine
SANITARY
We sterilize your suit with live
steam and drive out all dust and
dirt. Steam Pressing restores the
"Life"to your clothing makes it
look like new.
Keep your garments in good
condition by having them pressed
regularly, The Modern Way.
9
It's True Economy
Keep-U-Neat
Phone 133
Below the Belt
Little problem In mathematics
How many times 82 will amount to 9
out of 10. Try this on your iniagln
atlon If you can't solve it by algebra
Hint on woman's page: "When
boiling, a kettle should never be
quite full, as It Is apt to boil over."
A man doesn't always have to be
run to slop over.
Depends on how hot he Is.
Perjury Is Increasing, so they tell
us. 'lhey ought to know.
Inside Information Is the best, as
the champion eater at the boarding
House observed.
She sang with that careless than
don that made many in the audience
think that her favorite grandchild
hadn t been dead over an hour.
Dr. Osier was a much abused man.
The Doc is generally credited with
the saying that they should be chlor
oformed when they reach the age of
sixty. He probably never said it,
but the Idea isn't so bad in some
cases.
The biggeBt Joke at the boarding
house isn't aware of It.
Takes himself seriously, maybe.
It's wonderful how sickening and
mushy a display of affection can
seem unless you are the party that's
putting it on. We heard a story
about a man who failed to pick out
the right place and the right girl
that may be worth telling some of
these days.
"Oh, sh-h-h-h-u-s-h!"
Sometimes you can shush 'em!
A man looks funny when he's
blushing behind the ears. 1
But long legs can beat a more
hasty retreat than short ones, so they
tell us.
The bigger they are, the harder
they fall. What's that quotation
about the mills of the gods?
You've heard that story about the
piccolo player trying to drown out
the bass druniT Well, he finally suc
ceeded in splitting himself.
The biggest frog in the puddle
doesn't always croak the loudest.
We haven't forgotten all our
Shakespeare. You remember that
one about: "He smiles and smiles
but still a villain."
'Nother one: "The lady doth pro
test too much." The sex is wrong,
but the application is plain.
We'd vote for the office boy for
editor every time. A real sense of
humor is indispensable.
"Nine out of ten" and "eight out
of ten." Some modesty, what? Re
minds us of the story of the man who
boasted that he had eaten forty-nine
hard-boiled eggs at a Bitting. A
friend asked him: "Ben, why didn't
you eat one more and make it a
record." The egg-eater looked at
him with fine scorn and retorted:
H i, do you think that I'd make a
d d hog of myself Just for one
egg?"
VAUDEVILLE AT THE
IMPERIAL THEATER
Saturday Bilghfn Program Greeted
By a Crowded House, Which
Showed It Approval
The Imperial gave the first of a
series of vaudeville programs last
Saturday night, and the performance
was greeted by a crowd which taxed
the capacity of the theater. The pro
gram, which included the photoplay,
"The Ghost of Yesterday," featuring
Norma Talmage; a "Mutt and Jeff"
cartoon and five acts of Western
vaudeville, was a trifle longer than
usual, but easily held the attention
of the big crowd until the final act.
Chase and Jains, resenting dainty
bits of musical chatter, and Baker
and Baker, divided the honors for
the evening. Both acts were given
several recalls and found it difficult
to make their escape. George Tur
ner presented some puzzling feats in
magic, and accompanied his mystify
ing performance with a good line of
chatter. Gorber and Gorber, "orig
inal nuts from Brattl," won their
fair share of applause.
' The Imperial plans to present sim
ilar programs each Saturday night, it
is announced.
DAIRY CATTLE
MUST BE TESTED
Htaf Department of Agriculture
Preparing to 1 force New
Inspection Iaw
Secretary Leo C. Stuhr of tho Ne
braska department of agriculture has
issued a statement giving a digest of
the provisions of the dairy law
passed by the last session of the leg
islature, whioh becomes effective
July 18, 1919.
One point to which especial atten
tion should be called Is that where
any milk or cream producer sells his
product to a concern which pasteur
ises It, or to a manufacturing plant,
he does not need to have his animals
certified or examined.
One of the provisions of this law
requires dealers in milk and cream
to obtain an annual license from the
department of agriculture In all
cases where the product, in whole
or in part, is sold to be consumed as
milk or cream, when produced from
a herd consisting of more than flvie
cows. Those who sell milk or cream
which Is the product of a herd of five
cows or less, and those who sell'hiilk
and cream produced from any num
ber of cows when the entire product
Is sold for manufacturing purposes
exclusively, are exempted from this
provision. The fee for this license
Is one dollar and all licenses expire
on July 1 of each year.
The law also provides that no milk
shall be sold which has been taken
(a) from any animal having any dis
ease or sickness, (b) from any an
imal which has not been examined
by a duly licensed veterinarian, and
certified by him to be free from dis
ease, within not to exceed one year
previously. Milk which has been
taken from any animal which has not
been examined by a licensed veterin
arian, must be pasteurized before it
is offered for sale. This latter pro-
vtsion'applles to the sale of all milk
and cream regardless of the size of
the herd from which it is produced,
whenever the product is sold to be
consumed as milk and cream.
The policy of the department of
agriculture has been to give ample
time to the owners of dairy cows in
which to have the same tested. An
effort has also been made to co-operate
with local officials especially the
boards of health, who would natural
ly be Interested in the enforcement
of the provisions of the dairy law.
Members of these boards are request
ed to inform the department of any
violations of the above provisions or
any others of the dairy law so that
prompt action can be taken in en
forcing this measure.
Plenty of Good
Things to Eat
We still have plenty of good things for you to eat this cold
weather. Everything is of fine, selected stock calculated to
add much in tone and variety to your daily menu.
Look over the list come in and sec them. "NVe aro confident
you will be pleased
APPLES
Fine-flavored, Solid; by Box or Quantity
GRAPEFRUIT
Excellent for Breakfast v
ONIONS, CELERY, NUTS, ETC.
Chrysanthemums Are All Oone for the Season
But we still have some '
CARNATIONS and ROSES
that are easily up to our high standard of excellence.
See them for yourself.
Alliance Floral
Company
The licensed veterinarians are re
quested to co-operate in every way
possible and especially in the way of
designating a certain day at which
time cows can be bunched in one
place, so that the rates for testing
will be as, small as possible for the
owners of these small herds. Veter
inarians are also requested to adhere
to the scale of fees for such tests as
recommended by the bureau of an
imal industry of this department.
County agents are asked to co-operate
by giving every assistance pos
sible to the owners of dairy cows in
bunching them at convenient places
and at designated tlmeg so that the
fee for testing can be reduced to a
minimum and not be a burden, es
pecially to the one cow or small herd
owners.
This is a subject in which everyone
is vitally interested. The owners of
dairy herds should be Interested In
knowing that their herd is free from
disease; the public at large Is inter
ested in obtaining the best quality
of milk possible, so that everyone
should co-operate In every way pos
sible and assist in carrying out the
provisions of this dairy law.
Ssrit it a real satisfaction-
J r J v; yf rc.yJ
H 'Y M$ TP
One day an important looking
civilian made his appearance . at a
British rest cstp, where there were,
also some Americans.
"That's Sir John Harrington, M.
P.," explained a Tommy.
"Huh! Why don't your M. P.'a
wear uniforms?" queried a Yank.
on Christmas or any other occasion, to
know the gift you are presenting is the best
that money can buy?
When you present a box of Brccht Chocolates, you do
so with confidence as well as compliments.
Through sheer merit,
Brccht Chocolates
have won their way to
the top they are won
derful confections,
from their beautiful j
chocolate coating to
the heart of their de
licious centers.
You'll find them the CHOCOLATES
that truly
'Make Life Sweeter
k
il
6iptt Cancltj G. - Denver