llo'o Column
M
And they Bar that the Christmas
rush was bo strong that even the
country postamsters didn't have
time to read the postcards.
Luke MrLuke Say
Some people would rather have a
food lawyer than a clear conscience.
You may have noticed that the lad
who talks about the Blessedness of
Poverty is always a fellow who owns
balf the real estate In town.
What has become of the old-fashioned
woman who used to call her
husband a Home Angel and a Street
Devil?
The world would make more pro
gress if we didn't leave everything
to Committees. If the building of
the Ark had been turned over to a
Committee the old barge wouldn't
be finished yet.
The man who won't pay anything
else Is always waiting for a chance
to pay a grudge.
A dog is mighty human. Ever no
tice how quick other dogs will start
a fight with the dog that Is wearing
a ribbon around his neck?
And what has become of the old
fashioned "refined widow lady" who
vsed to advertise: "Object, matrimo
yT" It is hard for a man to pay a just
4ebt without acting as though he
was conferring a great favor.
When some married, men hear an
other man say that his wife is an an
gel they imagine the other man must
be a widower.
There Is one mighty important
distinction that must be settled some
day and we might as well settle it
here. The man who wears pants
carries a cane and the man who
wears trousers carries a walklng
ctlck. Blondes are not the only women
who are light-headed.
Love's young dream seldom dies
of old age.
The small man was feeling uncom
fortably crushed in the crowded car
when a brilliant Inspiration flashed
Into bis head.
He turned to the big man near
blm.
"I hope you don't object to riding
beside a smallpox patient, do you?"
be inquired as the car slowed down
at the stopping place.
"No: but some of the other pas
sengers might," replied the big man,
and, taking him by the shoulders, he
threw the schemer out Into the road.
When he had carefully examined
the shoes the physician had brought
In for repairs, the German cobbler
banded them beak saying: "Dem
shoes ain't worth mending, doctor."
"Very well, Hans," said the doc
tor; "then, of course, I won't have
aiythlng done to them."
"Yell, but I sharge you 50 cents
already yet."
"Why, what for?"
"Vy, ven I came to see you de ud
der day. you charged me for -telling
me dot dere ain't noddings der mat
ter mlt me."
Never did the town hall present a
more animated scene, bubble over
with brighter prosplcience, wear a
more satisfied smile over an envla
ble record, and a renewed plebescite
f confidence and power, nor return
mile for smile, compliments, cour
tesies for courtesies, mellifluous
words for delciferous agraphs than
a last Monday evening on the oc
casion of the adjournment sine die
of the old board of trustees and the
Induction of members-elect and the
Inauguration of the new board. The
courtesies of gentlemen made room
for the many lady friends present,
whose handsome gowns, radiant
miles and healthful and cheerful
ara set off the banked and floral
tributes, making It a typical "garden
f gull.': Cicero (O.) News.
There was once a "Southern gen
tleman" who, having killed a man,
presented himself to the editor of a
newspaper.
"I have come," he said, "to tell
yon about a painful occurrence at
my house. My brother-in-law and I
bad an argument and I knifed him
and then, in the excitement of the
moment, I scalped him. Knowing
what exaggerated stories are apt to
get Into the newspapers, I thought I
bad better step around and tell you
exactly what did happen."
. Opportunity
"OpporchU4.iO . ays Mr. Dooley
"knocks at lv-ry man's dure wanst.
On some men's duress it hammers till
It breaks down the dure, an then it
goes in an-' wakes him up if he's
asleep, an, afterwards it worruks f r
blm as a night-watchman. On some
men's dures it knocks an' runs away
an on th' dures iv some men it
knocks an' whin they come out it
bits thim over th' head with an axe.
Hat lv-ry wan has an opporcbunlty."
A stout woman was always in the
habit of baying two seats when she
went to the theatre, in order that
he could have plenty of room. The
other afternoon she, as usual, bought
two seats at the box office, and pass
ing Inside, handed the two tickets to
the attendant.
"Where Is the party who Is going
to use the other ticket? he asked.
"I'm going to occupy both seats
myself!" explained the woman.
"I'd like to see you do It," said
the attendant, looking closely at the
tickets. "The seats are on opposite
sides of the aisle."
He came ambling up to the hotel
desk, leaned his elbow upon the
counter and said slowly to the clerk:
"I want a room."
"Yes. sir. What kind?" asked
the clerk.
"I want Itooin 30."
"That's taken. I can give you
another just as good.
"Don t want no other. I want
Room 30."
"My dear sir," pleaded the patient
clerk, "Uoom 30 is now occupied by
Mr. Dennis McCarthy."
"That's me. I have just fallen
out o the window."
It Iteally Ioe Itelleve IltieuinaliNin
Everybody who Is afflicted with
Rheumatism in any form should by
all means keep a bottle of Sloan's
Liniment on hand. The minute you
feel pain or soreness in a joint or
muscle, bathe It with Sloan's Llni
ment. Do not rub it. Sloan's pene
trates almost immediately right to
the seat of pain, relieving the hot,
tender, swollen feeling and making
the part easy and comfortable. Get
a bottle of Sloan's Liniment for 25
cents of any druggist and have It In
the house against Colds, Sore and
Swollen Joints, Lumbago, Sciatica
and like ailments. Your money
back if not satisfied, but it does give
almost instant relief. Buy a bottle
today.
Adv No 34799
EXPERIENCE OF
HANS GARBUS
Story of Fanner Who Sent Ills Cash
to Mall Order Houses and t ost
llimwelf $5,600 in U Years
Hans Garbus is a farmer. He is
a German farmer in the state of Io
wa, and being Hans Garbus, and a
German, and a farmer, he has learn
ed some interesting things. There
are many Germans; there are many
farmers not only in Iowa but in oth
er states, but there are not enough
like this man Hans Garbus who have
learned things from their experi
ence.
This farmer, Hans Garbus, wrote
a letter to the Farm Journal pub
lished in Philadelphia in which he
summarized his experience, also that
of his neighbors, and in which he
old some interesting things that he
had learned during the lust thirty
years or more that he has been fol
lowing the business of farming In
the state of Iowa.
Tis letter is indeed a human docu
ment. It is so human that it should
be reproduced by every local news
paper throughout the country that
other farmers, who are following the
practice of living in one community
and lending their business support
to another, might read of the fate
that befell Hans Garbus and some of
his neighbors who did likewise for
so many years.
Mr. Garbus writes as follows:
"We farmers are awakening to
the fact that we have unmistakably
reached the period where we must
think and plan. I am one of the
slow German farmers that bad to be
shown, and I am now giving my ex
perience that others may profit, for
knowledge is more expensive now
than two years ago.
"Twenty-nine years ago I began
my farm career. I bad an old team
and $50. Our furniture was most
ly hand-amde chairs, cupboard and
lounge made from dry goods boxes,
neatly covered with ten-cent creton
ne by my girl wife. We rented eigh
ty acres. Being a boy of good hab
its, I got all needed machinery and
groceries of our home merchants on
credtt until fall crops were sold. The
first year was a wet season and I did
not make enough to pay creditors. I
went to each on date of promise and
explained conditions, paying as much
as possible, and they all carried the
balance over another year. They
continued to accommodate me until
I was able to buy a forty-acre piece
of my own.
'As soon as I owned these few
acres the mail-order houses began
sending me catalogues, and gradual
ly I began sending my loose change
to them, letting my acconuts stand
in my home town, where I had got
ten my accommodation when I need
ed it.
"We then had one of the thrifti
est little villages in the state good
line of business in all the branches,
merchants who were willing to help
an honest fellow over a bad year,
and a town full of people who came
twice a week to trade and visit. Our
little country town supported a li
brary, high school, band, ball team,
and we had big celebrations every
year. A farm near a live town soon
doubles in value. I sold my forty
acres at a big advance and bought
an eighty, gradually adding to it un
til I had two hundred acres of the
best land in Iowa. I then felt no
need of asking favors, and found it
easy to patronize the mail order
agents that came almost weekly to
our door. I regret to say that I
was the first in the county to make
up a neighborhood bill and send it
to a mail order house. Though we
got bit once in a while, we got in
the habit on sending away for stuff.
"Gradually our merchants lessen
ed their stock of goods for lack of
patronage. Finally we began to
realize that when we needed a bolt
quickly for machinery, or clothing
for sickness or death, we had to
send away for it, which wasn't pleas
ant. One by one our merchants
moved to places where they were ap
preciated, and men of less energy
moved in. Gradually our town has
gone down; our business houses are
"tacky" in appearance, a-number are
empty, our schools, churches and
walks are going down, we have no
band, no library, nor ball team.
There Is no business done in the
town, and therefore no taxes to keep
things up. Hotel Is rlosed for luck
of travel. Go down to the depot
when the freight pulls In and you
see the sequel In mail order packag
es.
"Nine years ago my farm was
worth 1195 an acre; today I'd have
a hard matter to sell it at $167 an
acre. It Is "too far from a live
town" so every farmer has said
that wants to buy. He wants a
place near schools and churches,
where his children can have advan
tages. I have awakened to the fact
that in helping to pull the town
down, it has cost me $5,600 In nine
years. Like the majority of farm
era, I didn't figure far enough ahead
"This sort of business means the
doing away with country towns
What will it mean to farmers to
have only a few large cities at a dis
tance of five hundred or one thous
and miles? What are we going to
do with our children, who are de
manding even better advantages
than we had?
"Those cities we help to build re
turn no favors; they take our money
but offer no credit In time of need.
If we want high schools, etc., we
must raise the money and build near
our farm homes or send our boys and
girls to the cities at great expense,
amidst temptations of which the
farm has no equal. Neither am I
the only awakening farmer. These
mail order agents that come to our
homes every week are becoming a
nuisance and making It unsafe to
leave women and children alone on
the farm. With farm cordiality we
take these strangers into our homes,
often as one of the family, and we
are sometimes paid In having them
entice our girls to the city.
"These are some facts that need
consideration and I have decided
that the safest proposition all around
In for the country people to look af
ter their own interests, and build up
their own country towns that bring
value to their farms. Let those who
want to patronize the city mail order
house go there to live, getting their
living where they give their patron
age. The remainder of my life will
be given to building up the home
town that I helped to pull down.
Brother farmers, you can take my
advice or get your knowledge the
way I got mine.
HANS GARBUS."
lOII HOWARD, !0O
Th readers of this raper will be
Dlfaxed'to larn that there Is at leant
one dreaded dlaeaae. that science has
been able to cure In all its atasres, and
that la Catarrh. Hall's Catarrh Cure
la the only punitive cure now known
to the medical fraternity. Catarrh be
inar a constitutional diHease. require
a constitutional treatment. Hall's Ca
tarrh Cure Is taken Internally, acting
directly upon the blood and mucous
Rurfaces of the aystein, thereby de
troytnff the foundation of the dtHeaxe,
and giving the patient strength by
building up the constitution and as
ftixling nature In doing Ita work. The
proprietors have so much faith in its
curative powers that they offer One
Hundred ioiiarn ror any cane mat u
fails to cure. Send for list of testi
monials. Address: F. J. Cheney & Co., Toledo
Address: F. J. CHUNKY 4t CO., Tol
edo. O.
Sold by all Druggists, 75c.
Take Hall's Family fills for consti
pation.
I'aMor Invited to Alliance
Rev. G. F. McDougall, pastor of
the Presbyterian church at Bridge
port, occupied the pulpit of the First
Presbyterian church at Alliance last
Sunday morning and evening. A
communion service was held In the
morning. Rev. Mclutyre preached
at Bridgeport on that day. The
church here has invited Mr. McDou
gall to become pastor. He is an
able preacher and a gentleman of
pleasing address. The Herald be
lieves he is the man for the place
here, and that he will receive a cor
dial welcome If he decides to accept
the invitation that has been extend
ed o him.
Guaranteed, niacksmithing
I have opened a blacksmith shop
tn the brick building on the alley
back of Rodgers' grocery. Black
smithing and horse shoeing. Prompt
service. Work guaranteed.
W. L. CARROLL.
adv-4877-dec31-2t
(oes o San Fraiwiwo)
Go. Schulte, one of The Herald's
Hemlngford subscribers, left Monday
noon for San Francisco, where he ex
pects to stay until the end of the
year, attending the big exposition.
He will stop at Denver for a few
daya on his way west.
President Tri-State Iiand Co.
C. N. Wright of Scottsbluff was in
Alliance Monday forenoon enroute
home from Omaha. He is president
of the Tri-State Land Company, pro
prietors of the Tri-State canal, the
largest Irrigation project In the
Platte valley except that operated by
the government. Irrigation compan-
Jewelry I Watches
WE CARRY A SPLEXDID STOCK OF JEW
ELRY, GOLD AND SILVER WARE, AND
WATCHES GOODS THAT ARE
Reliable pcll Reasonable
EVERY READER OP THIS PAPER IS IN
VITED TO CALL AND INSPECT OUR LINE
OF GOODS
Brennan's
les have been annoyed and hindered
a great deal by law suits, growing
out of conflicting claims. The Tri
State had one case against it that
was carried to the supreme court of
the state, where it was decided In
their favor, altho casting them many
thousands of dollars and delaying
them two or three years in the sale
of land. Mr. Wright informed The
Herald that he thinks there will be
less litigation regarding irrigation
claims in the future than in the
past.
The Liver Itegulates the Ilody
A Sluggish Liver Needs Care
Someone has said that people with
Chronic Liver Complaint should be
shut up away from humanity, for
they are pessimists and see through
a "glass darkly." Why? Because
mental states depend upon physical
states. Biliousness, Headaches, Diz
ziness and Constipation disappear af
ter using Dr. King's New Life Pills.
25c at your Druggist.
Adv No 3 4799
Vistteii in the Mark HilN
Two Alliance girls had a splendid
time visiting in the Black Hills. Miss
Frances Lock wood left on the morn
ing train New Year's day for a two
weeks' visit in Deadwood and Rapid
City, in both of which, cities the
Lockwoods resided before coming to
Alliance. While in Rapid City she
will be the guest of Mr. and Mrs. Ben
Wardman. Miss Elsie Betebenner
went to Deadwood last Saturday for
a visit at the home of Mr. and Mrs.
Bronkhorst, returning Sunday night.
Both of th egirls report having a
fine time.
Liked The Article
"I liked the articles in last week's
Herald about the early history of
Box Butte county and the new court
house," said Mr. Tash to a Herald
reporter Monday morning. "I be
lieve that they are the best I have
ever seen of this kind. I am send
ing several copies away one to
Captain Corbin, who says that he
would rather read an Alliance news
paper than receive a letter from
here."
Returns to School
Henry Hier of Antloch came up
Sunday with his daughter Gladys,
who Is staying with Mrs. W. F. Pat
terson while attending school in Al
liance. Mr. Hler is an old friend of
The Herald and often makes this of
fice a call, but regularly the fore
part of each January he calls to set
his subscription a year ahead, and
also that of his brither, E. A. Hler,
Bishop Hill, Illinois.
NOTICE
TO PHAIUIK IXMi OWNERS
Now is the time to dispose of your
herds. Guaranteed poisons at the
rate of three cents per acre, sold at
Holsten's. You can get the poison
and do the work yourself.
HOLSTEN'S. THE REXALL STORE
dec 31-2t-5204
Returned from Vacation)
The members of the faculty of the
Alliance School of Music who spent
their holiday vacations at home or
away from Alliance, have returned
to their duties. Miss Burnett and
Mr. Unlacke returned Sunday and
Miss Might on Monday. The large
enrollment of the school keeps the
efficient corps of teachers busy.
iiffiil USED SAGE
IEA TO Di
ihe made up a mixture of Sage Tea
and Sulphur to bring back color,
gloss, thickness.
Ooinmon garden sage brered into a
heavy tea with sulphur and alcohol
added, will turn gray, streaked and faded
hair beautifully dark and luxuriant, re
move ewry bit of dandruff, stop scnlp
itching vud falling hair. Just a few
applications will prove a revelation if
your hair is fa.iinj.', gray or dry, scrag
gly and thin. Mixing the Saga Tea and
Sulphur recipe at home, though, is
troublesome. An easier way is to get the
ready -to-use tonic, costing about 60 cents
a large bottle at drug store . known as
"Wycth's Safe and Sulphur Hair Rem
thus avoiding a lot of muss.
While wispy, gray, faded hair is not
lnfuL we all desire to retain our youth
ful appearance and attractiveness. By
darkening your hair with Wyeth's Sage
and Sulphur, no one can telL beeaum it
does it so naturally, so evenly. You just
dampen a sponge or soft brush with it
and draw this through your hair, taking
one small strand at a time; by morning
all gray hairs have disappeared, and,
after another application or two, your
Hair beonmea bMutifuIlv dark, ffioaarv.
1 soft and luxuriant.
QUIT MEAT IF Yl
KIDNEYS ACT BADLY
Take tablespoonful of Salts if Back
hula or Bladder bo thert Drink
lota of water.
We are a nation of meat esters and
our blood is filled with urie acid, says a
well-known authority, who warns us to
be constantly on guard against kidney
trouble.
The kidneys do their utmost to free
the blood of this irritating acid, but
become weak from the overwork; they
get sluggish) the eliminative tissues clog
and thus the waste is retained in the
blood to poison the entire system.
When your kidneys ache and feel like
lumps of lead, and you have stinging
jains in the back or the urine is cloudy,
full of sediment, or the bladder is irri
table, obliging you to seek relief during
the night; when you have severe head
aches, nervous and dizzy spells, sleepless
ness, acid stomach or rheumatism in had
weather, get from your pharmacist about
four ounces of Jad Salts; take a
tablespoon ful in a glass of water before
breakfast each morning and in a few
days your kidneys will act fine. This
famous salts is made from the acid of
grapes and lemon juice, combined with
lithia, and has been used for generations
to flush and stimulate clogged kidneys,
to neutralize the acids in urine so it is
no longer a source of irritation, thus
ending urinary and bladder disorders.
Jad Salts is inexpensive and cannot
injure; makes a delightful effervescent
lithia-water drink, and nolwdy can moke
a mistake by taking a little occasionally
to keep the kidneys clean and active.
Do you want trash, ref
use and rubbish hauled f
Vaults cleaned! We do
this work quickly at rea
sonable prices. Special
rates for business and res
idence property.
Phone 678
Pegg and
Darnell
FIRE! FIRE I
ATTENTION, FIREMEN I
Whenever your city is in
the market for Fire Hose or
Equipment, you should at
once write us, as it will be to
your advantage.
Also bear in mind that we
sell Hand Extinguishers for
automobiles, private houses,
lumber yards and schools.
ANDERSEN COMPANY
1115 Farnam St.,
OMAHA, NEBR.
HOUSE TO RENT
or lease. Land
to rent or lease.
Land or city
property for
sale. Phone 36.
C. W. JEFFERS
Real Estate Owners
and dealers need the REAL
ESTATE EXCHANGE. It's the
livest realty paper published.
$1.00 per year, low advertis
ing rates. It brings the re
sults Sample copy on request.
Real Estate Exchange
Belle, Bio.
J. F. YANDERS
TAILOR and HATTER
FIRST NATIONAL BANK BLDQ.
ALLIANCE, NEBRASKA
WHEN IN OMAHA VISIT THE
Brand New Show
CVCRT WEEK
Musical Burlesque
Class. CIsmj EatertiiRiMxt. Erbdj Mt Ask
Aiufeotfj. U0lS' DIKE MATINtE DAILY
DO NT QO HOME SAYINai
I DIONT VISIT THE QAYETY
Scavcngei'
Say
Printers!
Why are you wasting
good time setting type by
hand,, breaking your back
and straining your eyes ov
er a type case? Do you
know that the time you
waste in this way would pay
you bet'er it spent out after
business and would pay the
cost of installing a nearly
new
Junior
Linotype
Machine
in your plant, allowing you
to give your readers more
news and set in better
shape. We have for sale, on
easy terms, a late model
two-letter (light and black
face) Junior Linotype. It is
completely equipped and in
good condition. For full
part'culars write to
Herald
Publishing Co.
Alliance, Nebraska
J. H. Fredinberg
and Co.
ASHBY, NEBRASKA
General Merchandise Hard
ware and Lumber, a Com
plete Line of Building Ma
terial, Tanks and Windimlls,
Coal and Supplies.
THE
FREDINBURG
HOTEL
First Class Meals, Clean
Comfortable Rooms
Modest Rates the Place
mere They All Stop
STEVEWS
Repeating Shotguns
The Stevens Hammerless
costs ne mors than some hammer gust.
It has the celebrated
STEVENS RECOIL UNLOCK
providing safety against
"hang-fires."
HAMMERLESS
SOLID BREECH
Easy Take-Down
12 or 20 Gauge
EVERT GUN
GUARANTEED
X Stores Aran & Tool Co.
P.O. SuMOS
CMooom Falls, Mass.
Oa Tour Trip
take with you a box of good
and a late
Get them at up town news
stand or at depot
filler Bros.
