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The Dakota City Herald
JOHN H. REAM, Publisher.
DAKOTA CITY, NEDRA3KA
SAVING AN ANCIENT INDUSTRY,
Justice Scuddor's decision that it Js
not slander to call n horso dealer "a
skin" establishes another bulwark fdr
freo eppneh. As tho JuBtlrc remarked
ii? dismissing tho suit, "Things llko
,that aro nearly always said in tho
courso of a horse deal." They are, in
'fact, an essential part or tho transac
tion, says tho Now York World Thoro
probably never was a horso deal ono
party to which did not think ho had
uccii wuumfu, unu m nrevnni UV U1W i
,thp freo expression of his grlovanco mi'Iii?1'?"? 'V Uadf?ra answer
in tho trade's tlmo honored terms of , COST on ail ubj,-ct. ,'Vtainin, t tho
invective wouia amount to an inter ' ,uuJe" " Dunuinjr, ror tho reader of thla
'""" 'i "iiuuni 01 nis vriuo experience
as Kdltor, Author and Manufacturer, ho
la. without doubt, thn hlehmt ntiihnriiv
Bn all these mibjocts. Addrens all Inquiries
toWllllam A. Rndford, No. 178 West
inckeon boulevard. Chlcnen. m nnA nni
mamfrican mm t. Crfa
. X JLLJJLJL JL M li J.JL VI UL' 1 ifrnjfjfopb
vimm J-d ife zzL w "I r""" anaRLtlBl w? M&b tr$. tzznr t
, tot wfwatiiiWMjMggTOfi'BB o4l
., . ,i.nM.i iiaiiiiii,inmiHiwnn y yW T f i- ,tff Awtt VtV
tKSm
sCfiQlMM
o rn if
Policemen Assist Mother in Spanking a Bad Boy
fereuco with an ancient American In
dustry, Tho decision In effect au
thorizes tho contlnuanco or hoso-'
dealing under Its traditional rnothods,
whereas an adverse ruling would
have tended to hamper if not destroy
It. In thus dignifying tho language of
horso trading the learned Judgo docs
not, ltvls true, ralso It to tho level
of tho language of politics. It may
still be hazardous to call a dealor a
crook, or liar. Apart from Its now
legal- status, "skin" Is doilnod In tho
dictionaries as "a cheat, or fraud, or J
sharper." On a horso dealer's lips,
like "scamp" and "loafer" ou the lips
of a mayor, It has lost Its original
force from frequent and promiscuous
tncloso two-cent stamp for reply.
use and becomo a
term.
1 Au attractive design for a six
roomed houso of ono and a half bio
ries, comprising many desirable feat
ures, Is shown In tho accompanying
perspective and plans. It is not very
largo; but fortunately, small low-cost
houses often have advantages over
largor ones. Threo of those advan
tages aro light, sunshine, and air. In
ft small houso, opposite windows are
jnocossarily near togothor: and tho
light from oiio often crosses that of
another, although they may bo in dif-
""i juuiiiB. aunsninn. or rnnmn
niBhod and kept in good repair, it may
bo made more attractivo than some of
tho larger houses on the wldo street.
I do not mean mat a person should k"
Into a part of the town whoro prop
erty Is neglected; but thero aro many
side Btroots leuding off from main
reshlenco avenues that are more do-
Nrw
stln
YOmC-r-Thero's a cratornl
Sting In tho Palm of Mrs. Mnrenrnt
O'ilanlon's good right hand tcTremlnd
her that sho has at last achioved her
ntnhlMMi rtt i. ,..
slmhln fnr immna .hnn !, mi i .""""" "o nas spanned nor four-
52 ?sSnJLXrJ-J2. BSS1 elt-sks ,
- - '"-. "...". ii. uo mifto ions
or smnii. i iinvo seon mnny more
real homes In tho smaller Iiouscb than
In tho larger ones. I think tho pro
portion is very much greater,
Tho stairway in this little houso
combines a good deal in a llttlo 6paco.
technical trade , carries light, and it carries Ufo-glvlng
In view of tho shocking cruelties
alleged against animal experiment!
atlon, scientists who uphold tho
practlco and dony tho cruelty should
In the Interest of scienco and of tho
public alike agree to renounce any
contention for tho secret and unre
strained pursuit of this practlco. Tho
mpat tenderhearted and ronsclon.
tlous become hardened to suffering
in tho courso of continual work, and
ii is against all human experience
to Insist that any unrestricted prac
tice will not becomo liable to abuse.
If can do lawful experiment no
harm to satisfy tho public mind by
proper regulation and supervision
that cruelty which is harrowing to'
tho popular feollnsr is not practiced
"? secret In medjeal laboaratoriea.
That the lay public 1b greatly In
terested in practical electrical devel
opment is forcefully shown in tho in
creasing attendanco at tho annual olec
.trical shows held in New York, Bos
"toii and Chicago, as well as art demon
strations of household appliances giv
en at Intervals by central statldns
throughout tho country. At tho latest
electrical exposition In Now York
Jjjoro wasan attendanco on ono eve
ning oi ai,uun visitors, followed 6n
the next day by 20,000. About COO.
000 porsons visited tho Boston show In
fourv.-poks. A central station in H14
west recently entertalgod 1.C00 ladlo
at an (iftuiuoon lea nt which corteo
nd cake making on electrical appli
ances wero practically demonstrated.
proportlos besides. LIkIU. alrv housm.
are almost always healthful and cheer
ful. In crowded cities, house's offer
ing such advantages aro always occu
pied, whllo dark, dismal houses often
go bogging for tenants. In this design
thero are threo rooms downstairs and
throo rooms upstairs, and they nro
arranged to provide a groat deal of
comfort and convenience.
When a man stnrts to build a houso,
ho usually has some particular ideas
in mind that ho wishes to havo
worked into tho plan. Vory often
thoso nro not practical, Thoy havo
been extracted, as a eonnrnl thir.r
I from some other plan, and cannot well
uo grartea into tho new design -with-
out spoiling tno symmetry. You can
not havo everything In ono house, no
matter what its slzo or tho amount of
money It costs. Thero nro natural ad
vantages that go with th'o environ
ment, which cannot bo successfully
transplanted. This is ona of the prin
cipal reasons why architects are nee
eBsnry. Ono of the most difficult prob
lems an architect runs up ngalnst is
to prevent owners from Injecting Into
houso plans IdeaB that aro not llttlnir
r practical undor oxlstlng conditions.
Ono man-insisted on having a porto
cochero nt tho side of his houso, when
tho lot was not wldo enough to ac
commodate tho extension, Ho got his
I I yu
t-j"' nootl,m
Aim j Tto J
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fczr l.oc jf
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fl ceo too I -7
I Fewi
Dad boy" and. thnnch twn
brawny pollcomcn assisted In tho op
eration, sho It was who struck ovory
indignant blow. '
John, who is sometimes called "Tho
Eel," becnuso ho has tho ability of
tho greased redskin of yore to slip
through avenging lingers, has mado
himself especially worthy of his repu
tation. Some times, so Mrs. O'Han
lon says, she just had to stand awe
struck and wonder how such a car
load of badness could evor hnvo boon
compressed into her bad boy's four
feet of height and seventy pounds ot
bones.
First of all, ho issued a declaration
of independence, in which ho stated
his Intention of staying away from
school. Also, ho didn't think he would
spend all his nights under tho ma
ternal roof, being "past 14." Also, ho
didn't think he would take care of
his younger sisters, while his widowed
mother wns out carnlne thn inmiiv'.
living, nor would ho carry any moro
kindling wood In for domestic con- r
sumption.
Seizing his ear tho only portion of
his anatomy upon which any one can
get a handhold, Mrs. O'Hanlon car
rl"d him upstairs. Once there, John
began to vent his Indignation. Ho
took tho kitchen lamp and tossed it
out the v.-indov.-. He took dishes out
of tho cupboard and smashed them
on tho floor. Ho tried to wrench tho
door oft tho icebox. Ho slapped his
.small sisters. Ho called his mother
nntnes.
Policeman Herdenrolch heard the
rncKet and came upstairs. When he
wns told Mrs. O'Hanlon'B bad boy was
at it again, ho entered into tho pur
suit nvith a zest. Thero was a pro
cession to the pojlce station.
Lieutenant HIckey on the desk nt
the "house" was astounded when tho
villlanles of John O'Hanlon had been
recited. A grin stole over I1I3 faco.
"Take him out In that room." he
said.
''Follow, madam," said tho lieuten
ant, bowing townrd Mrs. O'Hanlon.
Sho dlU, with a great, great Joy
welling up in her heart. Woman's in
tuition, perhaps, told her what was
going to happen.
With Herdenrolch holding his foot
and another policeman his head, Mrs.
O'Hanlon's bad boy was disposed
across his parent's knee.
And then and then but go ask
Mrs. O'Hanlon, who can tell you bet
tor than any ono else In tho world.
& Suitors of
Bife. Xf
Pa. 1T lERRIWID
BTKENNETT
JIAERis
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MCLIGOA WOULD NOT JOIN THE
ARMY. .
"He seems to bo a very nice sort of
a man," remarked Mrs. Menlwld's
maternal maiden aunt Jane, "and as
the wifo of an army officer you would
have a certain social position, you
know. I'm not sure that I dislike tho
idea, Melissa."
8econci Floor Plan.
Besides leading both upstairs and
down, it gives a grado entrnnco to
tho cellar, a side entranco to tho
kitchen, nnd It takes up very little
room.
Downstairs tho main featuro Is the
dining room, which la large enough to
mako a comfortablo sitting room; and
it is especially attractivo on account
of tho threo windows and tho grato.
Whore a chimney can bo so placed
bb to accommodato tho furnnco In tho
collar, tho rango in tho kitchen and
the grato In the dining room, you got
a largo amount of comfort and satis
faction with comparatively llttlo ox
penso. Other advantages In a cltim-
Basket of Lively Crabs Cause Great Commotion
PWL
r:r Tho Eciontlflo world Id bUgllinluK to
recognize In tho 'United States a de
cree of progress in certain branches
of medical science which puts this
country oven nhoad of Germany. That
this is not moro empty talk Is demon
strated by tho circumstunce that tho
eminent Vlenncso phyician, Dr. Carl
von Nofirdon of the medfcul faculty
of VIennt university not only has at-
tested these things by word of mouth,
But has sent his son to this sfdo of
thJAUantleto become a student at
Johns Hopkins.
A vory proper general order has
beei issuetrty tho chief of police of
-Cincinnati prohibiting the scattering
broadcast in that city of tho ashes of
tho cremated dead. People who have
read of tho disposition made of HIiq
remains -of tho poet Joaquin Miller
on his mountain-sldo homo at Oakland,
'conceive tho notion that it is a ro
mantle thlntf for human ashes to bo
thrown into tho air from tho ton of a
Bkyscraper or othor tall building, and
viirnea uy 1119 wind, which blowoth
"WSUlnfr it liBleth, To otheTff the prac
tico Bavors of disrespect for tho dead.
The health deportment of Cincinnati
has declared that it is unsanitary.
Certainly it makes a wholly superflu
ous addition to tho dust nuisanco.
which in every largo city is bad
enough as matters stand.
PFIIDiVDELPHIA A basket of crabs
which were tied to the seat of a
motorcyclo caused a commotion the
neighborhood of tho Episcopal hos
pital tho othor day that will long bo
remembered. Incidentally, it wrecked
ihe motorcycle and landed tho rider in
tho hospital with a fractured skull.
And tho causo of It all was one crab's
dash for freedom and a healthy appe
tite, who wandered out of the basket,
climbed tho rider's back and affec
tionately took hold of his neck. The
unexpected nttack from the rear
caused tho rider to lose control of
his machine.
Harold WllBon, twenty-three yearf
old, of 177 Westmoreland street, left
for Wlldwood, N. J., tho other morn
ing to go "crabbing." After he had
disported himself in the surf and later
on captured a good supply of large
ones, ho decided to return home. He
tied tho basket on tho back seat of
tho motorcycle. All went well until
he reached Kensington and Lehigh
avenues. There, ono ot tho largest
of tho collection becamo restless and
crawlod up his back. When it reached
his neck it bit hardvand held on. The
pain on the back of his neck was so
Sb
sudden and unexpected that Wilson
lost all control of the machine and was
thrown head foremost to tho curb.
A crowd Of a hundred nnrnnna
quickly gathered and Wilson was car
ried to tho hospital," which was but
a short distance from tho scene of
the accident.
Augmented by numerous Sunday
strollers, tho crowd had assumed pro
portions that threatened to block
traffic, however, in tho excitement,
overlooking tho basket of crabs which
had escaped and wero scrambling
through tho throng. Their preaenco
beenmo known when one of them
fastened onto tho ankle of a nrettv
girl, Her screams started a stampede
that cleared tho thoroughfare iu iee
ord time. '
"I suppose it's worth considering,"
said Airs. Merrlwld, reflectively. "He
looks vory well in his uniform, too,
especially the full dress one At tho
samo time, sweetheart, I might get a
colonel on the governor's, staff, if I
gao my mind to It, and have some
thing that was sure enough prismatic
with ostrich feathers thrown in and
none or 1110 Ulsadyuntuges of the mil
itary career. And a governor's col
onel or a Uniform Hank Potentate of
Pocatello can bo a bank president or
a successful soap manufacturer in prl-
vuiu uio, wnicn also gives a certain
eoclal position and allows one to keep
a hired girl and some shreds of rep
utation." "I don't think I ouito timlfirsfnnd
that last allusion, my cft ar," said Aunt
Jane.
"That's because you had that attack
of neuralgia und couldn't go to tho
Post with me," explained Mrs. Merrl
wld. "You pee, denrlo, wo of the
army are ono big family and wo know
one 'another and our llttlo fallings
only too well. When one of us armv
women meets nnothor army woman,
me iwo or us discuss the carryings
on of the rest of us with family froc
dom. That's ono of the disadvan
tages of army lifo. Of course tho
army men know each other well, too,
bat being men, they are naturally
charitable and even generous to each
other. If one is promoted, the others 1
are an tickled to pieces about It and
admit that ho richly deserved It. If
ou speak of any officer who is sup
posed to have distinguished himself in
any way, tho choms or admiration
that arises from his brother officers
would warm tho cdcklcs of your heart
especially if tho distinguished one
happens to bo a volunteer who never
saw the Insldo of West Point. Yes,
hind possessions," continues Mrs. Met
riwld, thoughtfully. "There's always
a clmnco that her hero may be sent to
tho Philippines and como back With a
doranged liver. I don't care how
bronzed and bearded and interesting
ho may look or how many honorablo
scars and medals or honor he's got.
If his liver doesn't work the way it
ought, a cloud of bilious gloom will
descend upon the homo and bo lifted
nevermore. Still that's only a risk.
The real obstacles to my union with
tho gallant captain are unavoidable."
"What aro they?" inquired Aunt
Jane.
"In tho first place, I'd havo to ac
custom myBelf to riding in an nmbu
lanco," replied Mrs. Merrlwld. "But
mat wouldn't bo so bad as having to
put up with a femmo de chambre
with a red mustache who chewed to
bacco and drank whisky and was or
iginally engaged for plain, manly
butchery. That would cortainly Jar
me," concluded Mrs. Merrlwld.
(Copyright, 1313, by -W. G. Chapman.)
RED KITTEN WHOLE SHOW
Its Peculiar Shading Attracted Atteni
tlon at a Recent Exhibition at
London, England.
"Havo you seen the red kitten?"
was tho question every other nerson
I was asking at tho Bhow of the Nation-
ai uat club at tho Crystal Palace.
The red kitten, which bolones to
Mrs. H. Cook, and waB Judged the best
cat In the show, may bo described as
tho ideal cat at which the fanciers
have been aiming for years. Louis
Wain, who was Judging, has never
seen Its equal. Its redness Is not
marred by one spock or suspicion of
white. Its eyes nro alternate circles
of light red and- dark red, just as its
coat is alternate streaks of the two
shades.
"Never before at any show." said
Mr. Wain, "have wo won such a per-
Lfcctlon of shading as a numb?r of tho
cats exhibit. So delicate are thoy that
they can only bo Judged by pure day.
light."
All the Average Plain Little Woman Has to Do
fj '"i?TrTTWT-j
mMkl rimmi
Idea from a different Btylo of hmiso
built on a widor lot, and it was so
thoroughly fixed in his mind that ho
yns prepared to nacrlllco much more
desirable features to carry out his
idea. Ho could not understand that
such attachments dp not ordinarily go
with small houses on narrow lots. Of
courso. thoro Is no law against It.
If a man Is stubborn enough, he can
A youth who married a show gtrl
lost a eult for $50,000 when his moth
er proyed him incompetont to man
age his own affairs. Even his wifo
probably won,t caro to manage Uiom
now without tho ?50,000.
A war aoroplano has boon dropping
bombs upon Mexican soldiers, says a
report, It is a comment upon human
invention that beforo ono ot thla
kind becomes uafo oven for Its opor- J
ntors, it Is being put to destructive
uses.
'TIs a wonder thnt somebody doesn't
solve that old.'Sld riddle: Does a worn
au dross for men or for othor women?
A woman might easily achieve Immor
tality by confessing.
'-1 OAXIrf- 61
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rwtcA
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U BfUrAO TO
war
SEWITD ON
SOMB BUTTONS-
OWCPfP OP
WATOES
ANO WAT
1AIDTW
FIRE AtlD
' I
-
SEATTLE, Wash. Sho was Just a
plain, mlddlo-aged llttlo woman, un
pi'utehtluua In dteSri and bearing tho
kind that is mot with by tho hundred
overy day in tho 'stores, on tho side
walks and In tho street cais, usually
carrying bundles.
She was on tho witness Btnnd nnd
the lawyer had asked her what alio
did after looking out of a' window at
ten o'clock in tho evening and seeing
a policeman arroBt a man.
"I didn't do anything to apeak of,"
she said. "I just set some luead to
some
clothes I wanted to wash tho next day
to soak, nnd chopped up somo po-
M
Even grand dukes aro now dancing
'the tango, wlich may bo couBtrued
fltuer as an uplift for tho tango or
deterioration for grand dukes, aa
-regard for thoso potentatoa varies.
The people who disapprove of It wll
Kobably not be converted to its ad
Vantage by grand ducal arguments
A wlrelesa service may bo instituted
UMtmb the United States and Nor-
,W.' Wk 1 dtataace to a time Ilka
i 1
u
First Floor Plan.
build any kind of freak houso or bitch
on any tort of attachment, nnd tako
plonty of tlmo afterwards to rogrot
doing bo, 1 havo Boon a great doal
of such nonsonso In building.
Ono of tho first principles In homo
building Ib to exerclso common-senso
In buying a lot In a location reason
ably accessible to one's placo of busi
ness and In a satisfactory neighbor
hood; then follow this by building a
house thnt fits tho lot, tho family, and
the man's bank account. As a rulo,
mon aro influenced by tholr moro
proBporous neighbors to build more
oxponslvo houses than they can af
ford, This ofton comos about from
selecting a lot in a hlgh-prlcod neigh
borhood. Thon a man foels under
obligation to build a house In keeping
with the street nnd with the ideas of
hlB neighbors. Ho cannot go against
popular opinion without losing caste.
It is much better to movo Into anoth
er part of tho town than to attempt It
But a llttlo houso llko this, for in
stance, is within the means of ovory
ambitious man; and, if properly fur-
noy like this aro that It usually draws
bettor; It climbs out Into tho upper air
through tho pouk of tho roo whoro It
is butter supported by tho houBo and
whoro It Is easier to llx tho roof
around It so thnt it will not leak. Still
nnothor ndvantngo is tho additional
height, which Insures a bettor draft
Chimneys llko this draw hotter for
another reason thoy nro surrounded
by warm rooms, nnd tho flues nrn
easily heated. Hot air naturally goes rise and monded n hole Jn ono of my
. . --- ............ .w..4 V..U1I, Ul mo ..... wil a DLUUItlllftO, unu iin
umranoy is increased by this natural
phenomenon. All you have to do to
havo things right, is to follow natural
laws and lake advantage. of them to
promote tho end desired. ,
This llttlo houso Is only 22 foot wide
bv .111 fnnt lnnc. ..,!ll.n... 1
the porch. A 2W00 house can Z C "J.T lu3iurlant. B.ot "f ""h'
... . ... uniK wiiisKers loomeii in inn nnor.
way of Municipal Judgo Hoblnson's
courtroom tho other day. Behind them
was concealed a mnn who later de
velopments Indicated must havo boon
a Republican.
If that Isn't Sonntor J Hnm Lowis
It certainly looks liko him," exclaimed
Judgo Robinson softly to his clerk.
The clerk craned his neck to boo the
mnn Bportlng tho rainbow hued alfal
fa. Instoad of tho peaceful Junior sena
tor from Illinois ho saw a man ad
vancing with clenched flats toward tho
court. Judgo RoblnBon believes the
man must havo boon a llp-readbr, as
tho remark nbout tho whiskers had
boon made In n whisper.
Ho was so wrought up ho attempted
to attnek tho Jurist and was oxpoliod
from tho courtroom only after n lusty
strugglo with two bailiffs and a clork.
"Whoro do you got that at?" Bhouf
ed tho offended bush wearer. "Do you
think I came In hero to bo Insulted
nbout my whiskers? Judgo op no
JUdgo, thero'a nobody can acenso mo
of looking llko any pink whlskored
tatoos and meat to mako hash for
breakfast and put a button on my
husband's trousors, and sot tho tablo
for breakfast, so as to save time in
tho morning, nnd laid tho fire so I
wouldn't havo anything to do but
light It In tho morning.
"Then I sort of tidied up my kitch-
uii unu Beeueu somo raisins ror a
cake I wanted to bako tho next
morning and ebiplied tho water un
der tho ice chest, nnd went down the
cellar to see that the furnncn was all
right for tho night. I 'brought somo
apples up from tho cellar and peeled
them so as to have thorn ready for
something I wanted to make the next
morning. Then I wound up the clock
and road the morning paper for a
fow mlnutC3 sd did threo or four
llttlo things a woman Is apt to do be
foro sho goes to bod when sho has a
family to look after. But nothing to
Bpeak of, after all."
Probably, if sho had lived I11 tho
country she would also have got a
lantern and sawed and split enough
cord-wood for tho noxt day's fuel.
"He Looks Very Well'ln His Uniform, Too."
comfortnbly placod on a 30 or 35-foot
lot nnd loavo plenty of breathing
space on all sides. Then, it does not
cost n great deal to build a compact
Httlo house from this plan. Undor
ordinary favorable circumstances of
material and labor supply, 2,000
should build It comploto, with plumb
ing, furnnco, piping for gns, nnd wir
ing for oloctrlclty.
Sympathetic Jewelers.
"If you want a dealer In Bllverwnro
to refund money for gooda that you
wIbIi to return, Just tell him the aril
clo was Intended for a present at a
wedding that has boon called off, nnd
ou'll get your monoy," a clover wo
man snld. "I havo had money refund
ed ulrendy this season on n sot ot
knives and farks .and n fruit dUh.
Thoy really woro bought for presents
and tho weddings really wero broken
off, thus throwing (ho things back ou
my. hands; but If thoy hadn't boon I
piobably could havo mado tho mer
chant believe bo, and he still would
hat o given mo my monoy, It 1b doubt
ful, though, If I could hnvo gotten
around him on any other protoxt. Aa
a rulo Jowolors and BllveramlthB die
llko to rotund monoy, but In case of
interrupted nuptials thoy relent. They
ronllzo that it isn't the customer'a
fault that thobo wedding bells rotuso
'to ring, and aro willing to save him
from loss."
Man With Pink Neck-Ticklers Was Very Touchy
ci
Short Jenks' Threats.
Bhort Jenks is always threatening
to give a written guarantoo, although
overy ono knowa ho can't write,
Atchison Qlobu
senator, 1 won't stand for it."
A bailiff grappled with tho Infuriat
ed man as ho strodo toward tho bench.
"Let go of mo. Tako your hand out
of my beard," he shouted as tho bailiff
twined his fingers In tho patch of hair.
The bailiff struggled manfully, but
realizing ho was no match for the
gontlemnn with tho Snmpsonlan
ndornmont ho gasped for holp. It
camo In tho person of another bailiff
and a clork.
Tho combined efforts of Judge Rob
inson's clerk and his bailiff and tho
bailiff who patrols tho hall of tho
ninth floor of tho city hall woro nec
essary to subduo the man. Flnnlly he
wns thrust out, cursing loudly.
May End Letter Writing.
A French inventor Is said to havo
perfected a dovico that threatens to
do awny with necessity for writing
letters, Ono tnlks Into a machine,
which mnkoB a cloth record that can
be transmitted to tho person with
whom It Is desired to communicate
and all ho has to do Is to set hla
phonograph going nnd listen. Hero
aftor, young ladloB In tho business of
stenography nnd typewriting who re
colve offers of mnrrlago from ellcl-
bio young men may feel it the part of list and forced to retire from actlr.
pru flnco to accent. . . v wu
Active Service.
A rather remarkable Instnnco of a
womnn'o long, unbroken record cornea
from Franco, whero Mmo. Laforest,
the oldest woman postal official, has
Just retired after 40 years of sorvlco
without onco having been absent from
her post, oxcopt during the recognized
holidays. Entering tho postal service
in 1863 nt tho age of sixteen, sho at
tained her slxty-flfth year last month
when, very much against hnr win.
she was placed on tho superannuation
some or us may bo at Fort Sill and
others at Fort Sheridan and some at
Washington, and some at MInandno,
but wo are "all ono big family."
"Of course human nature is human
nature anywhere," said Aunt Jane.
"But I think it'B u llttlo more so
in the army." opined Mrs Mcrriwid;
"sort of concentrated and nnrrowm)
down. Of course it's a gay life with
its bugles and its colors Hying and
its marching and countermarching.
I fa porfectly lovely to see a thousand
legs with but a single movement for
ming Into hollow squares and columns
and things when their gallant leader
says, Hunh!' nnd 'HarrunphS' I
wonder if Captain Manlleker would
do any huuhlng nnd harrunphing
around the house?"
"It's unllkoly, 1 should say," ob
served Aunt June."
"I'd show him somo entirely new
ovolutlons if he did," declared Mrs.
Morrlwid. "1 would begin with some
thing In the nature of a frontal attack
with a flank movement supported by
dy.nainlte; but eobib of tho vory pig
eonest breasted, turkey cockiest har
runphers in the army tako off their
boots and spurs in the halls and crawl
upstairs in their stocking feet when
thoy arrive home after hours. I'm
told bo, at least. It's ono thing to op
pose martini tramping squadrons and
embattled hosts and another to faco
a wstly Indignant woman at two
od.ock In the morning with a breath
cf something more than Buspioion."
"After all, they aro our nation's do
fenders," urged Aunt Jano.
"True, dearie," assented Mrs, Merrl
wld. "There's the glory part of it to
consklor. It would cortainly bo grand
to hnvo a hero husband Idolized by
his grateful countryraon. The only
drawback to that sort of thing is
that as soon as tho grateful country
men run out of bouquets, they in
stinctively turn to tho nearest pile
ot bricks. They've got to bo throw
ing Bomothlng. And then, you may
only get a part of your hero-husband
back. If 1 truly loved Captain Man
lleker, It would bo a great shock to
mo to find only about thlrty-thrco and
a-thlrd per cent, of him left after tho
cruel war was over, I don't sny I
wouldn't be proud of his remnants,
but I should always feel thoro was
something wanting, oven If it woro
merely a leg
"Anothor thing a prudent person
will duly ponder beforo marrying
The cult of tho cat is growing.
Never havo exhibitors gono to Buch
extremes in tricks of exhibition Ono
sent along with tho cat a tadpole In a
bottle, because the curious object ox
cited the cat's attention and inspired
that spry air which is supposed to ar
rest the judge's attention London
Mall,
New Leadless Storage Battery.
A "Swedish inventor has put on the
English murkct a np-v type of alka.
line storage cell. The plates consist
of iiiactlyo retainers which are load
f( with active material, oxyliydrato
of nickel mixed with graphite in tha
positives and finely divided alloy of
iron nnd cadmium nnd certain other
substancps In the negatives. This new
cell much resembles the Edison cell
not only in the electrochemical reac
tion employed, but in the fact that
extreme ingenuity is employed in tho
.mechanical construction to obtain
high space and ''weight efficiency and
durability.
Explained.
Dearborn I hear your brother is
trying to get a divorce?
Wabash That's correct.
."What's the trouble between him
and his wife?"
"Why, no trouble. They are as
happy ub two cooing doves."
"Then why Is he trying to get a di
vorce?" "Oh, I see you do not understand.
Ho's trying to get a dlvorco for an
other man. He's n divorce lawyer, you
know."
About Umbrellas.
Eyeglass wearers have long sinco
complained thnt people are careless
with umbrellas. Many pairs of glasses
havo been knocked off nnd broken by
persons who selfishly refuse to movo
an umbrella so as to allow other peo
ple to easily pass. A few oven per
sist in dangerously spinning an um
brella along a crowded street, endan
gering tho glasses and sometimes oyes
of passing walkers.
Indeed, No,
Yeast I understand that twenty
four soparate operations enter Into tho
construction of a watch.
Crlmsonboak But that doesn't neom
to add anything to ItB intrinsic iluo
when a fellow's trying to get t loan
3;
itlto tho nrmy is the danger of our Is- on It
