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The Dakota City Herald
JOHN H. REAM, Publisher.
DAKOTA CJTY,
NEBRASKA
' Al'EftUAN UZAUTY.
St. I'atil MqIiou 01 l-ru, wnoi- iji. -I
"1ICS8 It is 10 ckctnii victurps of ihi
women, pats Amoricj juat when: s!'t
likes to lie patted ttiort when ho do
Clares thst the women of tlilo tnmitl
are the most benutlful In the world
The best thins about Ri Hcllcu'i
charming cpmpltment is tl c fact thai
It has all the ear niarlT3 t a JulR
ment based on careful crIUcnl study
In the first place. RI. Hello ought to
bo a competent Judge of beauty. Ilia
profession Is the depicting of fomlnlna
loveliness. Nobody else In the whole
world ought to know better than ho
doos what real beauty 1b nnd nobody
else ought to know better whore to
look for It. In the second place, no
considerations of filthy lucor are pres
ent to explain M. Hollcu's enthusiasm
for tho American woman. He Ib, on
the contrary, a Frenchman, living In
Franoe and destined to do most of his
work In Franco, to which ho has just
returned after a visit to tho United
States. Self-interest, as woll ns patri
otic prejudice, If they carry any weight
with him nt all, ought to have con
spired to prevent the utterance In
which ho shatters the Illusion that
Paris Is tho real center of pulchritudo
on this sphere.
The court of appeals of Now York
In Glliesplo vs. Brooklyn Heights rail
road company lays down this rule: "A
common carrier Is Hablo In damages
to a passenger for an Injury to his
pellngB caused by the insulting lan
guage of Its employe, upon tho ground
of a breach of Its contract, which obli
gates It not only to transport tho pas
senger, but to accord to him respectful
and courteous lieutmcnt, and to pro
tect him from InsUlt from strangers
and Its own employes. Among tho
elements of damages In such a case
and which may be considered In de
termining their amount are the humili
ation and Injury to hU feelings suffer
ed bv him, not, however, lncludng any
injury to his character resulting here
from, and ho la. entitled to recover
compensatory damages only, not In
cluding punitive or exemplary dam
ages." Lord RIethuen, the British Hold
marshal, delivered In London recently
an adddess against the use of tobacco
by women. In the course of his re
marks he expressed the opinion that
tho force of bad example Is what'
makes women Bmoke that "one girl
smokes because sho sees her mother
smoking." In tho old times American
girls stopped smoking becauso they
saw their mothers smoking. That was
because tho mothers who smoked in
the old days usually putted at a. clay
pipe. The cigarette looks dalutlor;
but the largo body of smoking opinion
would condemn the cigarette a ssen
tfally dirtier and. more deleterious
than the clay pipe.
The, surplus of women In Great Brit
ain Is In tho proportion of 1,029 un
married females to 1,000 unmarried
males, and It is not likely to be materi
ally affected by such reckless conduct
on tho part of women as that Indulged
In by tho frenzied suffragette who
flung herself In front of King Qeorgo'B
horso at tho Derby. There are said to
be twice as many widows aB widowers
In tho United Kingdom. This would
Indicate that many ot "tho male per
suasion" arc following the Advice of
the elder Welor.
A British baronet says New York Is
lapsing into paganism. That Is what
comes of mistaking Now York's front
for ItB real self. Wo would hate to
believe that tho metropolis I as bad
as It appears. Doubtless thero is a
large majority ot decent rcspect&blo
citizens thero who never break Into
the limelight, but u between-stcamors
visitor could not be expocted lo be
lieve It.
Tho certainty of a new ace develop
ment Is manifested In two recent ox
tuples, that ot an actress In New
York who, refused, to givo out details
of her divorce action, and that of a
man who Is going to try to fly across
tho Atlantic, but had no photographs
for tho newBpaperB.
Ignorance underlies many of the
big losses of life. A stray dog In West
Virginia stole a purse and chowod up
Ovoa hundred dollars In bills, not
knowing what a paradise of meat and
bones It would have bought in its prcs
tlne condition.
A Paris correspondent notes that at
recent ball a young woman suddenly
dismissed her dancing partner at a sig
nal from henothor. The cause of the
dismissal was that "the young man
had benun to put on tango ulrs." It is
expected that the dangor ot similar
public Ignominy will prevent other
Parisian youth from venturing upon
the,, performance whllh In this case
was so promptly cheeked, and that
thero will be no furthorattompts at
tango In pollto circles In Paris.
Western man says that Inhaling a
little cement dust will euro bay fever.
He told the newspapers the story ot
hla relief, and,(a no ono elso hat
4oae no, we take it upon ouraolves to
polKt to said western man as a con
crete example of the proof ot tho cure.
if
A suan who had to bo "sliced" a aec
oad lime because a sponge wns left
behind hag sued for $50,000. Tho vau
deville stage suggestion of hooks nnd
eyes reeuro,
ft WIM a rKTvrTsrrzl&, Ji
Mr. William A. Hartford will answer
quontlons and give advice KHEK OK
COBT on all subjects pertnlnlnK to tho
subject of building, for the readers of thli
paper. On account of Ills wide experience
as Editor, Author and Manufacturer, lie
to, without doubt, the hlRhest authority
on all these subjects. Address all Inquiries
to William A. Itndford, No 178 West
Jackson boulovard, Chlcnfjo, III., nnd only
tncloso two-cent stamp for reply.
It often seems that the style or ap
pearance of the houso doesn't make so
much difference ns tho site on which
It Is built. In ovory town and village
there are examples that prove this.
There are delightful little places set
back among shade trees nnd flowers,
which give one a restful, home-like
feeling Just by walking past; yet tho
houso Is really very plain und ordinary
In design.
Then tor every one of this kind
there Is one of the other sort to keep
tho balance, probably. Evory town
has them tho houso Is largo and
pompous, quite an architectural crea
tion In fact, but It is set down onto a
small lot, crowded in, with all tho
trees and shrubbery cut down to make
room for It. In splto of Its size and
cost a residence of this kind Is very
far from attractive Tho homo build
er would not knowingly tnko such as
h model; yet, many times ha docs bo
causo ho docs not understand the real
elements of success In planning an at
tractive home; and a barren uninvit
ing place Is the result.
The experienced homo bulldor will
always, If possible, select a rough and
wooded silo; It It Is slightly hilly so
much the hotter. Tho labor and ex
pense. It Is true, for grading and pre
paring tho site for the building, und
for smoothing up the ground after
wards are greater; but the satlsfac-
tlon and niicrpsa of tho project Ib also
greater and tho attractiveness of tho
placo Increases aB the years go by,
whllo tho extra labor at tho beginning I
Is very soon forgotten.
Almost any stylo ot house harmon-,
lzes well with such surroundings and
Is Improved in uppearanco by the nat
ural beauties of tho building site.
Some materials nnd some styles of do
mestic architecture seem especially
well Bultod, however, for such uso.
Tho nccompanylng design is one of
theso.
It la planned something on the bun
galow ordor, with prominent roof,
broad on the ground nnd not overly
high
A distinctive featuro ot thlB design
Is the ubo of cobble stones In the largo
chimney and lire placo. These could
also o employed very effectively for
tho loundiitlon ot the building.
A cobble Btono wall can bo made
vnry nttrnrllvo If tho man laying It
properly understands the work In
any kind ot stone work tho unison
must use his head as well as his
hp.nds. The moro vartoty of color,
uhapo and size can bo obtained tho
more attractive uppearanco will n
cobble stonp wnll prnsent The stone
First Floor Plan.
should bo rather large nud laid ut ran
dom, not In rows, and should fit to
gether closely, so that fow of tho mor
tar joints are moro than one-half Inch
thick. The stonos should stand out
prominently and should not bo plas
tered to a smooth surfaco with mor
tar, neither should any broken edges
bo visible A good workman, y tho
propur uso ot cobblo stones, aB shown
In this design, can secure a very orna
mental effect and one exactly In keep
ing with tho general atmosphoro ot
the rustic slto on which the houso Is
built.
For tho walls of this houso either
clap-boards or BhtngleB may bo used.
Shingles aro alwaya appropriate for
tho walls of a houso of Blmple design,
especially In connection with cobblo
stono work, Thero are various pleas
ing ways In which shlnglos may bo
laid to suit those who consldor the
ordinary method of laying tho shlnglos
In uniform rows, flvo inchos to the
weather, too monotonous,. A pleasing
variation Is to placo tho shingles In
alternate rows of two and eight inches
to tho weather. This requires no
tnoro material or labor and gives a
very attractive appearance. The
shingles on tho roof, however, should
always bo laid In tho regular way
A glaqco nt tho noor plans will show
R very convenient and comfortable nr -
rangement of spaco In this house.
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Thore Is a largo central hall, with a
living room occupying tho entire
space at tho left, whllo tho dining
room with tho kitchen back of It Is
at tho right. On the second floor
thero are three bedrooms and a bath
room, also four clothes closets.
It Is a design and arrangement that
would bo hard to Improve upon for
any one desiring a comfortable resi
dence of artistic appcaranco. Tho cost
rig
-&!
Second Floor Plan.
Is estimated at $1,000, Including a good
grade of plumbing and lighting and
first class basement hunting plant.
EATABLES MANY AND VARIED
What One Race Looks Upon With
Loathing May Be Considered a
Delicacy by Others.
It Is a fact that ErnBPboppnrs from
an early time were regarded as a
favorite food by tho Israelites. They
were called under the moro familiar
name locust, which resembles tho
grasshopper so closely that In mod-
orn times they would have passed for
one.
Tho favorite way of preparing them
waB to crush them with wine or boll
them In hot water and dry them In
the sun. They formed a salad course
of many a famous dinner In tho old,
old days.
In Africa, even In modern tlmos,
ants are considered tho most delicious
form of food. One prominent English
historian quotes having received as a
present 20 baskets of ants pounded
Into a paste. Ho says himself that
It was nulto an eatable dish, tasting
like tho llvors of chicken.
Tho old ItomnnB ato beetles and
considered them a dolicacy. Even In
tho present day Brazilians eat bugs,
and It Is not an uncommon thing. It
you aro Invited to a festlvo dlnnor In
a Brazilian homo, to hiivo served you
In your first course some 20 varieties
of bugs, powdered and cooked In dif
ferent ways.
In fact, many of the black tribes In
Africa eat dies nnd tholr larvao In
tho Andama island n man must eat a
llvo rodent before ho can marry. If
ho la not willing to go through this
ordeal ho Is not permitted tho pleas
ure of a wlfo.
Chinese cat roasted dogs, as do
many ItuBBlans and our Sioux Indians.
A century ago dogs wore favorite
meat with our Louisiana dnrkles
Catching Fish With Dynamite.
In many countries of the east whoro
11 sh is the staple article ot diet It Is
caught In largo quantities with tho
help of dynamite. To each stick of
dynamite js attached a fuse which la
fired and thon thrown Into tho water.
Tho forco of tho explosion which fol
lows stuns tho fish, which rise In
large quantities to tho surface, then
tho natives wado into tho water and
catch them easily in tholr hands. As
very often the larger fish are only
partially stunned, however, upon being
seized they will often Inflict severe
bites upon tholr captors, so that dyna
mite fishing Is not without Its excite
ment In moro ways than one.
Kept Scholars at Work.
In Scotland up to tho middle of tho
eighteenth century, tho usual school
hours were from 6 a. m, till 6 p. m.,
with two brenks of an hour earlier
nnd worked so long as daylight last
ed. No alteration In the hours was
mado on Snturday, nnd even on Sun
day a certain amouut of sclfool work
was done, Tho holidays were re
stricted to a day at Candlemas nnd at
Whltsun, nnd a fortnight In the au
tumn. Bed Divided Against Itself.
Tom RIother, Jack's got half tho
bod!
RIother Well, you take tho other
half.
Tom I can't; he's got hU half In
tho middle. Woman's Homo Compan
ion, Seeking Light.
Ikoy Fader, vat Is dls socialism?
Fader Ub robbery, dot's vot it Is
robberyl
' Ikoy Is it voro a man's grodltors
. vants him to divide mlt dem? Puck,
7
mm
Philadelphia Rooster Defies Mandate of Court
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PHILADELPHIA, PA. With a covey
of five hens and an amplo supply
of cracked corn and plonty of wntor,
a whlto bantam rooster strutted
around tho yard of Charles L. Tull's
home, 2218 North Twelfth street, tho
other day, and openly defied tho man
date of tho common pleas court. Tho
diminutive fowl did not know or did
not gjve a rap what tho court or
"dered, for the rooster, despite an In
junction Issued by Judge RIcRHchael
against tho owner of tho bird, got up
at his usual hour, mounted the fence
and proceeded to sorenndo the neigh
bore by crowing at tho break of day.
Mr. Tull 1b tho proud owner of the
rooBter. He Rlr. Tull was out of tho
city with his wife, and when a clerk
in the office of P. A. Wllderrauth, the
plaintiff In the case, tried to serve
Mr. Tull with tho injunction It was
found that the owner of tho obnox
ious fowl was In Atlantic City.
RIembers of tho Civic club are
deeply interested In Rlr. Wlldermuth's
attempt to eliminato what ho consid
ers unnecessary noises. Rlrs. Owen
JfcHl
5rr-;
VVWWWWWVVMWWWWNWAMA
Umpity Boom! Boom! Then the Turtle Let Go
N3W YORK. Any boy from tho
west, whero crook 13 Just plain
"crick," and whero turtles aro as
thick as Juno bugs, could havo told
Daniel Holmes that tho bow end of a
mapping turtle Is no place to ldaf
around, especially when the weather's
clear.
Daniel come from Coney Island,
though, and anybody'll tell you they
know more about soft shell crnbs
down there than they do about snap
ping turtles, Coney island being a
snapping turtlo'e Idea of no kind ot
a place to Inhabit.
Bo that as It may, however, there
arrived at Frederick Brencke's fish
market at West First street and
Sheepshead bay road, Coney Island,
two ot tho biggest man-eating turtles
Coney ever saw. One weighed 380
pounds and tho others 256. The big
one evidently made up his mind ho
wasn't going to bo soup. Holmes
hands fascinated him and he waited
his chance. He didn't havo to wait
long. Holmes' lingers were soon care
lessly allaying In the neighborhood of
the turtle's chin, nnd It Just reached
out nnd took 'hold.
Holmes yelled. The snapping turtle
had a Arm grip, however.
ns-
Boy Dresses Up as Girl
CHICAGO. Nobody wants Boy Wise
baum, seven years old. Even the
Jewish Homo for the Friendless, East
Fifty-third and Ellis avenue, went
lack on hlrh, tho other day.
The superintendent says Boy Is tn
corrigible. Roy got to thinking over
hla past deeds and decided to reform.
There was no uso running away be
cause everyone know "that Roy Wise
baum.' "Geo, I wish 1 was a girl," he told
ono of his playmates. "RIaybo I
wouldn't bo so bad, and maybe some
body would llko we."
An hour later Roy was missing from
the home. About tho eame time Ser
geant Thomas Fitzgerald of tho Hyde
Pnrk pollco station heard a small
voice Inquire:
WV4WVAA
"Say-When John" Is Sure One Lucky Fisherman
CLEVELAND, O. Is thero anybody
who lost a watch In Rocky river at
13 minutes after 3 o'clock.
"Say-When John," Nelse Peterson's
trusty lieutenant on tho Cleveland
Yacht club's Island nt tho mouth of
the river. Is asking that question of
everybody ho moots on Billy Whlto'B
corner, "up tho hill."
John didn't foel strong enough to
work tho other day, so ho dug ovor
an acre or two of ground for halt
a pint of worms and went fishing. It
was an Important expedition becauso
ho was to try out officially a fishhook
which hla brother had Bent him from
Norway.
John dropped his hook In tho cur
rent of Rocky river. Immediately
somothlng grabbed It nnd started up
stream wivh It. John jumped Into tho
water and after herculean efforts
snaked a thirty-pound (Inspected
scalos) carp ashoro.
Tho catch wns too heavy to carry
homo lutact, so John drow his knife
and opened tho fish's vest. Inside
Too Trying,
"Then you don't llko theso after
noon teas?"
"Too rough on tho nervce. Here's
tho situation: I gotta hold a sand
wich in my mouth, a plato of cako in
ono hand, n cup of tea In tho other,
and nothing to set anything on but a
grand piano."
Censor All Motion Pictures.
All motion pictures In Bavaria must
bo shown before a 'board of censors
before they can be put on a screen In
tho shows.
11 11 MBftl$&
i M hp BRi .
Wlster nld she wns In sympathy with
his efforts, and that, since all roosters
are a nulsanco In a thickly settled
community, the court Is right In di
recting the owner lo either put 8,
muffler on 'the chicken or send him to
the country for the summer.
If the rooster crows after Rlr. Tull
Is served with the Injunction he may
be held In contempt of court. Mr. Wll
dermuth says ho will see that tho
papers nro properly presented, nnd
that he will back up his determination
to put tho rooster out of business by
having a court officer take Rlr. Tull
Into custody Just as soon as tho in
junction Is violated.
The cause celebre has suddenly
leaped into fnmu in tho neighborhood.
Neighbors who never before looked
over a fence or peeped through a holo
In the wall have developed a won
derful curiosity to take a look at tho
Bubject ot the controversy. A woman
of unusually heavy build snatched a
board from a fence when she tried to
gazo Into Mr. Tull'e back yard. The
children have also been boosting each
other to see the rooster and his five
barnyard companions.
Rlrs. Imogene B. Oakley, head of a
spVclal committee appointed by the
Civic club to do away with unneces
sary noises, declared a law should be
passed to prevent roosters from crow
ing early In the morning.
"Rlr. Wlldermuth was right In ask
ing the court to suppress the. nui
eanco," she said.
"Gee, and it's a clear day, too," sym
pathetically remarked an innocent by
stander. "What d'you mean, a clear day?"
yelled Holmes, trying in vain to choke
the turtle.
"A snapping turtle never lets go till
it thunders," said the innocent by
stander. "Pray for rain, then," begged
Holmes, hopping on the other foot
and pulling harder.
How long Holmes would havo re
mained attached to tho turtle no one
can eay, but the innocent bystander
had the forethought to stop a passing
band and hammer mightily on the
bass drum. Instantly the deluded
turtle let go.
Holmes' bitten hand wds dressed at
the Coney Island hospital.
"So He Can Be Good"
"Please, can I got a bed for tho
night?"
Tho sergeant glanced over hla desk
and saw a little girl bUndlug there
with gingham drees and straw hat.
"What Is your name?" he asked.
"I'm Tillle Spahn, and I'm lost," re
plied the girl.
Sergeant Fitzgerald turned tho girl
over to the matron, Rlrs. Rllnnlo Rlulr,
and notified all stations to try to
locate her mother. Presently Rlrs.
Rlulr came downstairs.
"That's a fine little girl you havo
up there," said Fitzgerald.
"Yes, she's a fine little girl only
she's a boy, and a very bad onp at
that," replied Rlrs. Rlulr. "He's Roy
Wlsebaum, and it'e the fourth tlmo
he's been here. 1 Just caught him
pouring all my sugar out of the win
dow." The home was notified, but the au
thorities had had enough of Roy. Two
small boys brought him his clothes.
Where Roy got the girl's clothes Is
not known.
Roy was turned over to a Juvenile
court officer.
"It ain't no use trying to be good,"
he said.
tho stomach he found a watch la
perfect condition, the hands stopped
at 13 minutes after 3 o'clock.
At llrst he didn't know whether to
part with tho watch. He wbb offered
$5 for It and refused to sell. Later,
however, ho vas taken with a terri
ble case ot stomach cranipa after eat
ing some ,of tho carp.
This, taken In connection with the
fact that tho fish was caught on Fri
day and that tho watch stopped at 13
minutes after 3 o'clock, has convinced
him that the tlmep'eco Is soaked with
bad luck. Now ho Is looking for tho
owner or tho man who offered him tho
live.
Methodical Construction.
"How about that dialect story of
yours?" naked the impatient editor.
"Coming right along, sir," replied
Mr, Penwlggle. "I have ull tho punc
tuation marks written and It won't
tnko mo moro than half an hour to fill
In the letters."
Loquacious Diet.
RllsBlonary (to cannibal) "What
makes your chief so talkative today?"
Cannibal "OMf he ato a couplo ot har
bors this morning" Rllnnesota Rlln-no-Ha-Ha.
Mffl(Dhe
vUl
MELISSA INCLINES TO OCCAS
SIONAL AGREEMENT.
Mrs. Rlorrlwld pushed up the right
sleeve of her looso dressing robe and
ltexed tho biceps of hor benutlfully
rounded arm after tho most approved
method, frowning as sho did bo.
"Shockingly flabby!" slip romnrkod
to hor maternal maiden aunt Jane.
"Wretched form! I'll have to buy a
nlco little gym suit and tako some
dally exorcises."
"Can't you take exercises without
buying a suit for lt? asked Aunt
Jane, who had an idea of economy.
"Certain kinds, perhaps," roplicd
Rlrs. RIerriwid, "that Is, of course, If
you're not English; but you see, dear
ie, I want to learn to walk on my
hands, and even in the privacy of my
own room ahem!"
Aunt Jane made sounds expressive
of annoyance.
"Really," Rlrs. RIerriwid, declared.
"I'm not fooling. Don't you think
If I were able to do It gracefully It
would be a nlco way to enter a
room?"
"You mean dlsgrncefully, I think,"
said Aunt Jane. "No, I don't think It
would bo a nice way at all."
"You would disapprove of somer
saults rapidly nnd neatly executed,
also, I presume?"
"My dear Melibsu," said AUnt Jane,
"If you wish me to leave the room,
say so plainly, but don't talk that
way. It's not ladylike and It's not
modest."
Rlrs. RIerriwid puckered her lips and
emitted a low, melodious whistle.
"Well, It's quite evident you don't ap
prove," she remarked. "We'll have to
leavo the subject of athletics, then, I
suppose. But please tell me, dear
auntie, that you believe In a woman
having a certain degree of freedom.
You don't consider, do you, that she
should be tied and trammelled by the
Flexed the Biceps of Her
obsolete conventions that have nar
rowed and cramped her for countless
ages?"
"If you are alluding to er to cor
sets, I muBt say that I consider them
both nroner and necessary," Aunt Jane
I answered. "Tight lacing is one thing,
and an adequate support that gives
trimness to tho figure and discourages
tho indecorous habit of lounging is un
other." "Do you think a woman should
smoke If she wants to?' asked Rlrs.
RIerriwid.
"Thdro you go again!" said Aunt
Jane.
"I feel sure you don't," declared In r
niece. "As a matter of fact, you dis
agree with mo."
"Perhaps nol m much as that cig
arette did." Aunt Jauo retorted.
"It was my first ntempt," said Rlrs.
RIerriwid. "The next tlmo I shall
not find It so Unpleasant, and after
that l shall begin to deilve enjoyment
Irom the practice You'll see."
"I won't," said Aunt June emphat
ically "Tho next time It happens, I
shall pack my trunk and go back to
Ki okuk on tho first train. There are
Eomo things, RIellssa, that I will not
countenance even In you."
"A good many things," said Rlrs.
RIerriwid, pouting. "You certainly
dnn't approve of much that I do or
much thnt I think. You don't like ray
now shoes "
"Tho heels are positively absurd,"
Aunt Jnno declared.
"You don't like my Easter Illy gown
or what I said to Hilda when she
burned tho chops this morning."
"Do you think, yourself, you were
justified lu what you said?"
"I think hose chops would havo Jus
tified anything," said Rlrs. RIerriwid.
"I ought to have thrown them at her.
I suppose you don't approve of
that."
"I decidedly do not." said Aunt
Jnno.
"And when I told Hilda to tell Rlr.
Josbo that I wasn't at homo, you
thought I was an absolute falsifier.
You don't love me, that's what's the
matter." Rlrs. Rlorrlwld took a clean
pocket, handkerchref from her bureau
drawer, shook it out of its folds and
applied It to her eyes. At tho same
tlmo her shoulders became violently
agitated. L
"Now, R!oll8sa, my dear!" remon
strated Aunt Jane,
Rlrs. RIerriwid gurgled.
"You know that Isn't true, RIells
sa You know that I do love you."
Rlrs RIerriwid dropped her pocket
handkerchief irud jumplug up, clasped
Bjgjtfc
Suitors of
MttMERmWID
vcv TTivnvTnnnnP
IMIVjLI r
MS
her relative In a close embrace and
waltzed her to the end of tho room
nnd back. Then sho let her go nnd
began to laugh.
"Well, I'm sure!" said Aunt Jane,
sotting her hair straight'.
"You darling! How refreshing you
aro!" cried Rlrs. Rlorrlwld. "You'ru
slindfl In tho dosort mid clnrot lemon
ade to tho parched throat. You're the
best over. And I had such a sickly
session with Rlr. Jesso last night.
Auntlo, dear, do you suppose thore's
anything moro awful In the world
than a kindred spirit?"
"I Jiardly understand you, my dear,"
replied Aunt Jane.
"Rlr. Jesso opines that ho and I nro
kindred spirits," explained Rlrs. RIerri
wid. "He bases his opinion on his
assurance that he has the same tastes,
ideas and convictions that I havo. Ho
looks at overythlng In tho same way.
He would sympathize with mo perfect
ly If I wanted to walk Into a room on
my hands. He would walk on his
hands by my Bide if he had a chanco
or throw somersaults or fits. Ho
wouldn't disapprove of my smok'ing.
He'd lend mo his pipe llko tho gen
tleman In Rlr. Wells' books. He has
my Ideas on politics and my ideas ot
religion and hlgh-lieeled shoes, and if
we were married, our companionship
would be so perfect that we would
neither of us Heed to say a slnglo
word. We'd just think and then nod
our heads at each other. No friction,
no argument, no rows and no mak
ing up again."
"It would be a peaceful existence,"
said Aunt Jane.
"It woufd be the very nest thing to
the silent tomb if It lasted; "but to
get right down to brass tacks, it sel
dom does last," said Rlrs. Merrlwld.
"Spirits that aro too kindred for any
use before marriage soon meet, llko
strangers, afterwards, and you can't
tell beforehand what form of disagree-
Beautifully Rounded Arm.
ment you have to depend on to while
away the dragging hours. It's as im
portant for married people to disagree
upon the right things as It is for them
to agree properly, You paste that In
side your best hat, dearie. The great
thing is to learn to tolerate and even
enjoy the stupidity, childishness,
weakness, narrowness and blindness
of your mate, and prefer them to tho
wisdom, liberality and Insight of any
body else on earth. That makes tho
happy marriage, auntlo."
"Well, I suppose- you think you
know, but In my opinion you aro to
tally and willfully mistaken," said
Aunt Jane.
(Copyright, 1913, by W. G. CViapman.)
i . ii ,
Beet and Cane Sugar.
Even a chemist, surrounded with all
i his scientific laboratory equipment,
I cannot distinguish beet sugar from tho
I cane product. Altliough derived from
different speclos of plants, tho re
fined product from the juice of tho
cane and beet is the tamo lu com
position, in sweetening power, In di
etetic effect, In chemical reaction, In
all other respects. Furthermore, if
maple sugar were rebolled nnd pass
ed through the process of refining, It
would lose Its aroma and flavor,
which are wholly In tho Impurities,
and the whlto crystals would be Iden
tical with those derived from sugar
cane and sugar-beets. Pure sugar,
whether derived frpm beet or cane,
Is as Identical as is pure gold, wheth
er mined In tho Rocky mountains or
In the Transvaal.
Consistent Dentist.
The Dentist You havo very good
teeth, madam. How havo you pre
served them so well?
Tho Victim In the Chair Ugh!
"I say, what do you use on your
teeth?"
"I'gh. Ugh!"
"Whon wero they last filled?"
"Ugh!"
"It doesn't hurt you, does It?"
"Ugh! Ugh!"
"RIadnm, if you don't keep your
mouth shut, I'll never bo able to fill
this tooth!"
A Young Diplomat.
"Gordon, go to bed this minute 1"
commanded Gordon's mothor
"NawI won't!" declared Gordon.
"What? Is that tho way to speak
to your mother?"
"I beg your pardon, mothor, I meant
to say, No, ma'am I don't intend
to'"
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