w
m
i
The Kaiser's
NARRATIVE OF
CAPTAIN ADAMS
(Copyright, by
HAD not seen his majesty i
alnco he had appointed
mo to bo ono of his cour
iers. I nau uecn gtveu iu
understand, however; by
tho foreign secretary,
Lord Lan3downo, that tho
klnc was highly pleased
with tho successful re
suit of my mission to
South America, which had
onvn.i tim fintrahln nf thn American
r nnnniirnn from destruction. I had tho
self-dopreclatlon to acknowledge thut
Ithls event was purely tho result of
chanco, and not duo to any ability of
mine; but Lord Lansdowno waved
DBldo my explanations.
"My dear Adams," ho said, "pleaso
.remember from now on that a king's
courier Is Judged by tho bucccsb or
failure of his mission not by his
doserts. ResultB are nil that aro de
sired, and It makes no partlclo of dif
ference how you obtain them."
I had begun to think that my posi
tion was to be moro or less a sinecure,
when ono morning my servant Talbot
ushered a little pace boy, a youthful
scion of ono of our noblest families,
Into my lodgings at Half Moon street,
Piccadilly.
"Aro you Captain Adamth, thir?" he
lisped, with tho blase Insolence of
12 or 13 summers.
"At your service," I replied, bow
ing. "Hlth majethty dothlreth your
p'rothonth Immediately at Tht. Jameth
palath," said the page, clicking his
heels and rotiring with a military sa
luto. I wasted no time, but hurriedly
changing into my frock coat, I ran
down the stairs, polishing my silk hat
upon my sleeve as I went. I reached
tho front door In' time to see the page
riding off In hla automobile. I hailed
a taxlcab and drovo to tho palace. My
nrrlval was expected, and I was Imme
diately shown Into a small room,
whore I saw an elderly gentleman,
dressed In tho conventional nttlro of
b London clubman, bending over a flle
of newspapers. It was his majnty.
He turned round tho moment that I
entered, camo up, and shook hands
with mo cordially, nt tho samo time
motioning to mo to bo seated. Then,
drawing up his own chair closo to
mlno, ho began speaking with evident
"Captain Adams," ho said, "I was
tho first tp regret tho unfortunate ter
mination of your career In tho diplo
matic service, and was also tho first
to suggest to Lord Lansdowno that
your abilities Bhould bo employed in
tho less legitimate but unquestionably
moro useful field. 1 have' not forgot
ten your deeds of courage in tho Af
ghan campaign of 1897, and, with your
diplomatic training, you should be one
of my most useful aides. But now to
como to tho point.
"As you know, tho kaiser has just
returned to Germany after a trip to
Morocco, and after making a bellicose
speech there which has astonished Eu
rope. All tho nations are ranged up
Tor a diplomatic conflict, namely,
whether or not the kaiser shall be
compelled to submit his claims
against France to an' international
tribunal.
"Unfortunately, I have Information
that the kalsor considers that, with
ftussla weak and exhausted after her
war with Japan, and unable to help
France effectively, tho moment has
arrived to crush his old enemy, hum
ble tho republic so that sho will never
rlso again, exact a tremendous Indem
nity, and annex tho northern prov
inces. I need hardly tell you that
Great Dritaln cannot see France con
quered by Germany, for this would
moan that the kaiser would bo the
dominant figure in tho world's politics.
"I havo positive Information that it
Is his intention to make a public and
theatrical declaration of war against
France from tho balcony of his palace
at Potsdam, within three or four days.
Arraying himself In the uniform of
Frederick the Great, brandishing, his
sword and wearing the eagle helmet,
he will, by this theatrical appeal,
sweep the whole nation with him. At
rU coats this must bo prevented.
"You will proceed to Potsdam, thon,
without delay, and demand an immedi
ate Interview with the kalsor. In my
name you will insist that ho abandon
this project. But, if he refuse, as he
probably will, then you will hand him
this private communication which I
now place in your hunds, staling that
nny such action against tho French
will result in immediate war with
England."
lite majesty tobo, Indicating that
the intervlow was at an end, and with
n few appreciative words, and instruc
tions that I should not delay,, dis
missed ine. I wen out of tho palaco
a victim of conflicting emotions. Pride
was dominant, pride at having been
Bolected for so Important a duty ono
no less than that of preserving the
peace of Europe. But with It was
mlnglod, almost as strongly, tho fear
of responsibility, the dread that I had
been given a task harder than I could
porform. For my success virtually
hung upon tho kaiser's whim. And
two years at the Berlin embassy had
taught me that this was tho X factor
In Gorman diplomacy.
That evening I caught tho Hamburg
boat, and, traveling all tho following
day, 1 reached Potsdam with tho
kalsor's momentous speech still In tho
future. It was evident, however, that
rumors of Impending war had gone
abroad, for thcro was a curious tense
ness In tho ntmosphoro, nn nttltudo of
waltlug and oxpectlng, to be discov
ered everywhere, and not only among
tho ofliclals. Moro than that, since
morning, a crowd had gathered in
front of tho palace, and this had grad
ually Increased, without tho police ma
king any effort to break it up, until
,011 the nearby streets and avenues
Hairdresser
"Detective .Diplomat" j
By H. M. EGBERT I
W. a. Chapman.)
wcro thronged with people. Insido the
palaco tho kalsor was supposed to bo
receiving a levee of his own subjects
and n fow distinguished foreigners,
who wore being presented by their
ambassadors. I had tho right of en
tree, as having been formerly at
tached to tho Berlin embassy. Im
mediately after having Bocurctl lodg
ings I donned my court suit and
hastened to tho palace doors In a
hack. My card was taken In to tho
master of ceremonies, and, two min
utes later, that functionary, all span
gled with decorations, came hurrying
out to mo.
"My dear Adams," ho exclaimed
heartily, "what a pleasure to see you
again 1 Is it business brings you to his
majesty's levee?"
"Business of an urgent character,"
I ropllod. "I must havo word with the
kalsor immediately."
Tho master of ceremonies threw up
his hands in consternation.
"Impossible," he muttered. "Ho will
see nobody until after tomorrow
morning. Ho 1r not oven at his own
levee. His brother, Prlnco Henry,
represents him. Tho kaiser absolute
ly refused to seo a legato from tho
popo this morning."
"Why not until after tomorrow
morning?" I queried.
The mnster of ceremonies turned as
red as a beet.
"Did I say that?" he murmured.
"Why, the fact Is pooplo aro saying
that ho has an Important document "
"That he Is drafting his speech
agalust the French republic," I In
terpolated. "That tomorrow ho will
put on tho panoply of Frederick the
Great, and, standing on the palaco
balcony, the lncarnntlon of hlB Imperi
al ancestor, ho will say words which
will launch all Germany over her
western boundaries."
"Well, yes," said tho master of
ceremonies. "That Is no secret in the
diplomatic world, and I bellovo thnt
Franco Is already concentrating her
legions upon her eastern borders. But
why do you como here to tell me
tills?"
"Because It must be Btopped," I ro
Jolned curtly. "The moment that the
first German company crosses tho
border, an English squadron will sail
for Hamburg."
He fell back, looking at mo In aston
ishment. "I havo spoken plainly with you," I
said, "because it Is imperative that at
least the kaiser understand the posi
tion. Now, will you tako mo to him?"
"I dare not," he answerod. "Will you
see the chancellor, Prlnco Buelow?"
I signified my willingness. It was
evident that my declaration had cre
ated an Intense offect in tho bosom
of tho worthy court functionary, who,
like most of his class, was more ac
quainted with the kaiser's intentions
than many of the heads of stato de
partments. A couple of minutes later
Prince Buelow camo along tho cor
ridor, resplendent with orders, and ta
king me by tho arm with great cor
diality, led mo Into an anteroom,
where we found tho master of core
monies pacing tho floor in agitation.
"I dare not go and tell him," ho
muttered. "And yet If ho should not
bo told, we should bo traitors to Ger
many "
"Let me seo tho kaiser," I Interpo
lated. "Impossible," said Prince Buelow.
"I would do a good deal for you, Cap
tain Adams, for I always found you
an honorable antagonist and a firm
friend In tho old days but that . .
. no. His majesty has one of his
nervous headaches, and he tramps his
bedroom, cursing the barber for not
arriving to massage his face."
"The barber?" I queried. "Not our
old friend M. Perruquet?"
"Yes," said the prince, laughing
grimly. "M. Perruquet, who used to
shave the members of the diplomatic
corps, came to tho notico of tho kaiser
and got himself Installed as chief bar
ber. The fellow developed n powor
of soothing his majesty's nching facial
nerves by maBsage, and hla majesty
Bwoara that nobody but he can give
him tho relief he seeks,"
"it is, tnen, impossible to aee him?'
I queried.
"Absolutely. But If you will trans
mlt your message to me, I "
Suddenly the door was flung open
heavily and, with a quick, nervous
tread, tho kaiser Wllhelm himself np
peared upon tho threshold.
"Buelow! Buelow! Whero the
devil Is that barber?" ho bellowed
angrily. "I sent for him nn hour agol"
Ho paused and seemed to notice mo
for tho first time. "Ha! An old ac
quaintance; an old fnco In a new set
ting, I think?" ho continued, evident
ly alluding to my non-mllltary uni
form. 1 bowed. "Captain Adams, your
majesty, formerly second attache of
the British legation," I said. "I havo
a message to deliver to your mujesty
of the most vital "
"Tho devil tako your messages," tho
kaiser cried, slapping his fnce violent
ly. "I'll have that M. Perruquet 'bas
tinadoed or at least I would If I
were tho Grand Turk."
"If your mujesty would deign to
grant mo five minutes' speech with
you " I began.
"No, no, wait till tomorrow after
noon," said tho kaiser peevishly,
turning aside. "My good Buelow, aro
you suro that orderly did not fall
asleep on the way to M. Perruquet'B
shop?"
"Then, your majesty, I am commis
sioned by hlB Britannic majosty, to
deliver this paper to you," I said, pull
ing the letter from my pocket-wallet.
"Give, Jt to Buelow," said the kalsor.
"Bead it, Buelow, but as you value
your post, do not speak of it to mo un
til tomorrow." And, cursing tho dila
tory barber, his majesty stamped vio
lently out of tho room, and wo could
hear him pacing tho corridor.
Prlnco Buelow, in tho mcantlmo,
had opened tho letter and read Its
contents. My attention had been dls-
' traded by tho sound of tho kaiser's
movements. 1 thought I heard him
i groan as ho passed out of tho door.
j Ho was evidently In great pain, When
I turned round I was amazed at tho
j change in tho chancellor's expression.
ins race had taken on a greenish
tinge and his breath camo In short
gasps. Ho placed his hand over his
heart, as If to still Its pulsations.
"If I had known," ho said, "I would
havo flung tho letter under his fnco
and shouted It In his ears," Ho began
to pace the room distractedly, "A
foreign War," ho murmured. "On sea.
And our battleships wiped out pro
maturely" Ho turned to mo sud
denly. "You know the contents of this lot
tor?" ho asked abruptly.
1 signified my assent.
"Then I can talk plainly with you.
You know that all Gormany Is await
ing tho kaiser's declaration of war
against Franco tomorrow morning, it
must bo stopped. At prosont Germnny
cannot afford to go to war with
France and England In alliance"
"Why not go to tho kalsor and in
sist upon nn nudienco?" I demanded.
The master of ceromonlos smiled.
"You do not know tho kalsor," ho
returned.
"Moreover," Bald Prlnco Buelow,
"oven If I woro ablo to do this
thing tho kalsor's obstinacy would bo
aroused. His pride and obstinacy aro
his dominant characteristics. No.
frankly, I see littlo hopo that this
can bo accomplished. Nothing can
turn him from his purpose"
"Perhaps 1 might," I hazarded,
"without an audience. Gentlomen,
since neither England nor Germany
desires this war, shull we allow ono
man to plunge two nations Into mis
ery?" They looked nt one nnother nghast;
plain speaking of thnt nature was the
exception nt tho kalsor's court.
"Tell me," I continued, "when will
his majesty make his speech from tho
balcony?"
"At ten tomorrow If the court
tailor has finished his uniform," said
the master of ceremonies with a slight
sneer.
-f fiejeb himself ivbe
i rreaericc aveoreatr
reincarnated
"And you will bo present?" I asked
turning to the chancellor.
"I shall enter hla presence In hla
private room, after the barber has
got through with him, nt qusrter be
fore ten. At ten o'clock ho will pro
cede me to the drawing room, where
the royal family and several of his
generals will be waiting on him. They
will follow him to the balcony, whero
ho will solemnly fllnc hla defiance Into
tho fnco of France."
"At a quarter beforo ten tomorrow
the danger will havo been avortod," I
Bald to tho prince. "Havo no fear;
thn knlser'a apeech will not be de
livered." "You aro not planning to assas
sinate him?" cried Buelow In toucs
that were only half Jocular.
"Nothing but his prido," I respond
ed. Thereupon, refusing to satisfy
their curiosity further, I withdrew and
returned to my lodgings. Yet, al
though I had hopos that my scheme
could be mado offcctlvo, I was as
sailed by doubts of tho most hideous
character. What would tho result
of failure be? But I did not allow
myself to dwoll upon theso thoughts
for long. After all, I could only do
my best; and, fall or succeed, I must
not despair until all was ended. Aft
er a hasty meal I hurried round to
tho shop of M. Perruquet, the har
bor, which was situated In a narrow
street not far from tho palaco. He
recognized me at onco and gave me n
volatile French greeting.
"Ha, M. Adams," ho cried, "Is It that
you havo como back to be Bocrotary
of tho embassy once moro?"
"IRtrdly, Perruquet," I responded
dryly. "I am hero on a short visit. I
hear they havo mado you court bar
ber now. How do you llko tho kaiser?"
"Mon DIeu!" ho cried, shrugging his
shoulders, "I havo Just como from
there. Today I mnssagc his face and
ho curso all tho tlmo llko ono fran
tic with pain. Tomorrow at nlno I
must bo thcro to shnvo and massage
him again. Ho tell mo my" touch, it
no longer euro tho pain. But wnltl
Let mo got only nnother 5,000 llvres
and I roturn to my dear Franco, to
live in obscurity and shako tho dust
off my shoos In tho faco of Gormany."
"I hear your dear Franco Is In dan
ger of a Gorman conquest," I said,
Perruquet'B face blanched. "You
havo hear it?" ho Bald. "Then It is
true. And I, a Frenchman, eat tho
broad of tho despot, tho tyrant."
"Listen, Perruquet," I Interrupted.
za
"Would you save Franco If I gave you
tho opportunity? It would mean thnt
you would havo to loavo Gormany lui
mcdlntoly and sacrifice all your In
terests hero. Still, If I Kavo you 5,000
llvres Into tho bargain would you
save Franco?"
Then, ns I modo him my proposi
tion, I saw his mouth open and his
eyes grow wider and wider with tho
nudaclty of It; finally his Gallic spirit
caught the contagion of tho thing,
and ho broko down and chuckled and
roared and hugged his' sides, and
gasped for breath, "whllo his fnco grow
red until I was afraid thnt ho would
choke himself to death. But finally ho
recovered and tho details wcro ar
ranged. Shortly beforo nlno o'clock on tho
following morning M. Perruquet was
to bring mo Into tho presenco of tho
kalsor, explaining that, sluco his own
touch had failed to allevlnto tho neu
ralgic pains, ho doslred his majesty to
try tho sorvlcos of a noted mnssour,
who had Jilsl entered hla employment
and was roputod to possess tho power
of healing. Thoroupon, tho knlsor
having been shaved by tho Fronch
mnn, I was to maBsage his faco thor
oughly for half an hour, whllo M.
Porruquot would Blip out by n sldo en
trance and prococd directly to tho rail
way station, from which a train would
convey him over tho border. I myself
would await whatovor fato camo to
me; I knew that, n unofficial but still
accredited envoy of hla Britannic
majesty, I would not bo likely to bo
molosted.
I gavo Porruquot a draft for 5,000
llvreB, which ho accepted roadlly, my
former ofilclal position vouching for
its genuineness In his eyes. Then,
with a few parting Instructions, I loft
him.
Next morning, soon alter eight,
when I passed through tho streets,
I saw tho square In front of tho pal
aco donsely packed with a surging
throng. Tho word had gono forth that
tho knlser's declaration was to bo
made that morning, and all Potsdam
was agog with patriotic L-ulhuslusiu.
I found Porruquet waiting for mo, and
wo hurried to tho palaco. I was ad
mitted, In tho barber's company, with
out question, andwe were lert to the
royal apartment, whoro wo discovered
tho sovereign of Germany lying In n
darkened room, Htilklngly clad In tho
s7 I ' 1
famous uniform of his ancestor, his
sword besldo him, and his helinot with
tho eagle brooding over it, upon a
chair.
"I am In agony, Porruquot," ho mut
tered. Then ho saw mo. "Who is
this?" ho demanded.
"An assistant of mloo, sire," re
turned tho barber, bending low. "Ho
possesses extraordinary skill as a
masseur, and will. I am confident, bo
nblo to relieve your majesty."
"Well, como, Bhavo mo quickly,"
said Wllholm, crossing tho room nnd
taking his scat in a barber's chair In
front of a mirror. But It was not to
my purposo that ho should watch my
manipulations. I busied myself with
my own preparations, whllo Perruquet
was Bhuviug the emperor, and, When
it came to my turn t" iimnHfigo him,
finding no moro suitablo excuse I
boldly wheoled tho chulr, containing
its Imperial occupant, Into another
part of tho room, from which ho could
not watch my movements.
I think tho audacity of this action
saved me For an Instant tho kalsor
sat up, the blood flaming In his
chocks, thon, apparently concluding
that ono who would bo so daring must
possess unusual qualifications, he re
signed himself to my manipulations,
lying back, us I directed him, with
closed eyes.
You may be Biiro that 1 massaged
him very thoroughly. From tho
Juncturo of tho hair with tho forehoad
down to tho chin, and to tho throat,
there was no place on which I did not
lcavo tho Imprint of my fingers.
"Why aro you massaging my
throat?" asked tho kaiser, onco. "Tho
pain 1b horol" Indicating tho su
pororbltal region.
I was nonplussed,
"Sire tho nerves connect," I stam
morod. Then, regaining courage, I pro
ccqdod. "Tho Inflammation Is In the
uciuai norvo trunits, wnicn pass
through tho throat near tho surfneo
of tho skin, though, by n sympathetic
oxtenslon, the pain Is felt In tho
branches around tho ears nnd over tho
eyes."
"Whoro'a Frrruquet?" ho demanded
again, having spoken to him and re
ceived no nnB'.vor.
"I do not pirmlt tho prosenco of a
third party whin I porform my cures,"
I answered valiantly, and with appar
ent unconcern, Tho kaiser laughed.
"Well, you Beera to know your busi
ness," he replied. "But hasten, for in
five 'minutes I havo on engagement."
I heard sounds from the crowd be
lowfitful choorlng. Tho noise
reached tho knteor'tt ears; ho stirred
uneasily, costing n glance toward
whoro hte helmot and sword awaited
his assumption. I mado a fow final
passes. "Thoro," I Bald, "Your maj
esty's pain will bo of short duration."
''I do fool better," ho grumbled.
"Tell Porruquot to bring you to me
ngalu." I sponged his faco It did net
mattor and sprayed him with eomo
Florida water, which 1 saw lying
among tho barber's botllos.
Wo woro In tho outermost room of
tho imperial suite, which hnd, of
courso, no doors, tho person of tho
emperor bolng Bocuro against lnva
nlon. Looking along tho corridor I
was enabled, therefore, to eeo direct
ly Into tho impel lnl drawing rooms,
at tho far end, in which n notnblo
gathering of ladles and officers In bril
liant uniforms, was In progrosa. Every
Instant tholr numbers scorned to bo
augmented. Tho crowd outside had
discovered them, too, and hnd moved
round to that portion of tho palaco.
thus still further augmenting tho num
bers of those collected in tho great
square, but leaving thnt part of tho
grounds beneath our windows com
paratively dosorted.
"Pleaso bring mo my helmet," said
the kalsor, rising and assuming nn
intensely dramatic nlr. "Stop! Do
not dnro to lay your hand upon tho
Bword. Nono but my uncostors and I
may sot our hands upon thnt honor
able blade"
It was ovldont thnt ho was keying
up his wholo nature to tho nttuno
mont of thnt heroic part which ho
had planned for hlmsolf. I am con
vinced thnt nt thnt Instant he folt
himself to bo Frederick tho Great,
reincarnated. Ho set tho helmet
fiercely upon his hendnnd buckled on
his belt, thrusting tho sword Into tho
scabbard. Ho stood in an nttltudo of
command, twirling his mustaches up
ward. I saw Prlnco Buelow appear nt tho
end of tho corridor nnd como slowly
townrd us, tottorlug llko an old man.
I guessed hla agony.
"Enough, you may lenvo mo," said
tho kalsor, dismissing mo with n wnvo
of the hand. Ho cast a hasty glance
Into tho mtrror, but, ns 1 havo said,
tho room was In soml-obscurlty, and
ho saw nothlug but the dim outlino of
his reflection, Thon ho stalked, hand
on sword hilt, down tho corridor to
meet tho prince. As his footstep was
heard outsldo I saw tho pages at tho
doors of tho drawing rooms stiffen
themselves, and tho olllcors within In
stinctively assume their military
bearing.
A cry rang through tho corridor. It
enmo from Buclow's lips. I saw him
Htnggor back and collapso against the
door of tho drawing room.
"Slro sire " ho stammered.
And tho knlcor, with solemn paces,
cntorod Into the nsscmblngo of all that
was moat brilliant in modern Gcp
many, walking toward tho bnlcony
j without, to make his declaration. I
saw nis snouiders go uuck hi uiimnty
faBhlon. Tho spirit of tho mnsquor
ado hold him fast in its bonds. Ho
was tho nntlon's hero; ho was going
to his public acclamation.
I saw tho assomblnge wilt beforo
him. I saw womon fnll back, .faint
nnd amazed; tho olllcors forgot their
bearing and clutched nt ono another's
Bleoves.
Between tho groat Fronch windows
was a mirror. Something was ad
vancing in it to meet the kaiser. Ho
saw tho eagle upon tho helmet, tho
uniform of his great ancestor, the
hand upon tho sword, tho fiercely up
lifted mustaches. But tho faco the
face that looked out at him wus black
as a negro mlnstrol's.
And, Indeed, ho scorned llko nothing
bo much ns a negro comedian at that
moment. The Incongruity, was ludi
crous; and tho sparkling orders nnd
brilliant colors of tho uniform looked
llko a clown's spangles.
For a moment tho kaiser stopped,
sick with horror. Thon, as ho tottored
backward, old Genernl Von Woydo
ran toward him nnd caught him In his
arms and led him from tho drawing
room.
I gasped hysterically. I bad scon It
all, waiting there In tho outermost
apartment. I know now that war waa
averted; that tho extract of walnut
which I hud rubbed Into tho poros of
hla faco nnd throat had brought hla
schomo to nothing. For how could tho
hnro of Germany nppoar beforo tho
mob In negro guise? And, before tho
knlsor could face the crowds again,
Buolow would havo brought him to hla
senses.
Hnstlly I seized a pen nnd, Bcrlbblcd
upon a pioco of paper theso words:
"It will wear off In n week J"
Thon I dashed for the prlvato en
trance und guiued It JUSt as tho Old
general entTod, lnmllnu; Hut wouotiiK
omporor by tho arm.
Moorish Wedding Banquet.
A wedding nt Tctuun has united tho
two most powerful fnnillloR la tho
town. Tho son of the colobratod Moor
T-flhady, lately tho llaaha of Tetuan,
has boon joined In matrimony with
tho daiishtor of tho Moor Alcuynn.
Nourly all tho Christian roaldenta of
Tetuan nttcndod tho coremony, ua
well as othorB who Journeyed from
Cuota.
Tho Moors who woro Invited to tho
feasting and revelry, which lasted two
days, bad such enormous appetites
that for tho purposes of different bau
nuots they slaughtered 2,000 hens,
2,000 chickens, COO shcop, 10 oxen and
S00 plgoons. Honey and cheese wcro
consumed by tho hundredweight, and
bottles of lemonade disappeared by
the thousand. For coffee and tea C.000
pounds of sugar woro required and
Lebady spent 125 on biscuits, pus
try and confoctlonory. London Tolo
graph. Twining Plants.
Ono of tho pocullarltlon to bo no
ticed In connection with tho twining
of plants 1b tbo fact that with very
few exceptions all tho Individuals ot
ono species always twlno In tho samo
direction. Most plants twlno In tho
oposlto courso to tho movement of tho
sun 'or tho hands of a watch. Such
twiners aro tho morning glory, wis
taria, wax plant, trumpot creeper nnd
many others. Among thoso which
twine In tho oppoalto direction the
bop and wild bindweed, or climbing
polygonum, aro familiar examples,
Harper's Weekly,
SURE NOT.
Tho Pessimist Fnmo Is a bubble
Tho Optimist But it Isn't tho hard
est blower that nttetna n,
IT IS CRIMINAL TO NEGLECT
THE SKIN AND HAIR
Think of tho suffering entailed by
neglected skin troubles mental bo
causo of disfiguration, physical bo
causo of pain. Think of tho pleasure
of a clear skin, soft, whito hands, and
good hair. Theso blessings, bo essen
tial to happiness nnd even bucccss In
llfo, aro often only a matter of a littlo
thoughtful enro in tho selection of
cffectlvo remedial ngon,ts. Cutlcura
Soap and Ointment do bo much for
poor complexions, red, rough hands,
and dry, thin and falling hair, and cost
so littlo, that it 1b almost crlmtuul not
to uso thorn. Although Cutlcura Soap
and Ointmont nro sold everywhere, a
postal to "Cutlcura," Dept. 21 L, Bos
ton, will secure a liberal earn pi o of
each, with 32-pago booklet on skin
and scalp treatment.
New View of It.
"I envy tho man who bollovcs that
superstition about Friday," said Mr.
Growcher.
"I consider It depressing."
"Not at all. A jnnn ought to bo
mighty comfortablo who can feel suro
there's only ono unlucky day In tho
Week."
Important to Mothers
Kxnmlno carefully overy bottlo of
CASTOIUA, a safo and suro remedy for
infants nnd children, and boo that it
Bears tho
Signature
In Uso For Over 30 Ycnra.
Children Cry for Fletcher's Castoria
It's humlllatinsr to discover thnt (li
folks who wo Imagine despise us never
even think of us I
Only a good mnn can bellevo that
a woman Is bettor than ho is.
The Jtiumaft Heart
Tho heart It a wonderful double pump, through trie
action of which the blood stream Is kept sweeping
'round and round through the body at tho rate of seven
miles an hour. " Remember this, that our bodies
will not stand the strain of over-work without good,
J' lure blood any moro than the engine can run smooth
y without oil." After many yean of study in the
octivo praotlce of medicine, JL)r. It. V. Pierce found
that when the stomach was out of order, the blood
impure and there were symptoms of general break
down, a tonic made of the glyceric extract of certain
'roots was tho beat corrective. This ho called
Dr.' Pierce's Golden
Being made without alcohol, this "Medical Discovery" helps the stomach to
assimllnto the food, thereby curing dyspepsia. It is especially adapted to diseases
'attended with excessive tissue waste, notably in convalescence from various
fevers, for thin-blooded people and thoso who are always " catching cold."
Dr. Pierce's Common Sense Medical Adviser is sent on receipt of 31 one
cent Rtnmpa for the French cloth-bound book of 1003 pages. Address Dr.
R. V. Pierce, No. (563 Main Street, Bufljtlo, N. Y.
W?&
W. L. DOUGLAS
2,50, '3.00, '3.50 & '4.00 SHOES
All Styles, All Leathers, All Sixes and
Widths, for Men and Women
THE STANDARD OP QUALITY
FOR CyS 20 YEARS
The workmanship wiiidi ha uiadeV.L.
Douglas shoes famcui the world over is
maintained in every pair.
If 1 could take you into my large factories
at Brockton, Mass., and show you how
carefully W.LDouglas shoes are made, you
would then realize why I warrant them
to hold their shape, fit and look belter and
wear longer than other makes for the price.
(lAIITIflN T,1 cenulnn have W, I,. Doug-las
ununun,,n, un,i prce stamped on bottom
Shoes Beat Everywhere All Charges Prepaid.
m Ilnvr to Order by Mull. KW.UDoug
Usjiil
laa tnori are not aoui in roar lawn. una airrct to
tactorr, Taka meaanreinenta ot root as shown
lu model itat style iteilredt alio anil width
uiuauy worn; piainorraproe; of tt. ineamm
I a-VJ
prtitr businM in th vorlcT.
iiKnt auia. -t cio rn larpeif ano
I sts srs
i y e. .
Illnitrnted Catalog Free,
W. L. UOOOLAH,
HS Spark St., Brockton, Mass.
-&Z2p
KtFKsCWSaaHfl
Itnyo Inmpo and lanterns fjlvc
most lljjht lor tbc oil used.
The light Is strong and steady. A Ravo never flickers.
Materials and worismanshlp are the best. Rayo lamps and
lanterns last.
Ath joir iltaltr to too pou All line of Havo lamps and lanterns, or writ for
illuttrattii bookltti direct to any agency of
Standard Oil Company
, Uneorporatadi
mm
Ltiy&
Tho Only Kooloy Institute In Nobraaka Umana, ntD.
H
s
Lit 111
SarsaparsIIa
Cures all blood humors, all
eruptions, clears the complex
ion, creates an appetite, aids
digestion, relieves that tired
feeling, gives vigor and vim.
Get it today in usual liquid form
chocolated tablets called Sarsatabs.
Tht Farmir's Son's
Great Opportunity
s wnywaiuor iM oia isnn to Dcromi
yonrlnticriunte? Uf sin now to
pivj'wro jur juur IDlnre
cdc. A (treat oddoi
i unity awaits you In
lanitoba.Huk&tctiernn
or Albert, jwhorg yon
can secure iw itooik
Frooliome-.
lead or Day
xonablo pria
rDtiyiacaairra-
Kow'stheTimt
not a year from cow,
when laud will ba hlnb-
thA ATmnflntit rmn. nt
M Oat and . Hurler.
as well as cattle rnKlng, or
canting steaar aarance in
Eric. UOTernmrnt return! nhow
bat the numlwr or aettlora
ii woitern Canntln from
larger In 1010 tfiaa tlio
jrvlouTar. - .
Many farmers hnro. paid
for their land out of Ue
proceed nt one crap,
tfreo Homratea'U of ISO
acres nnd pre-emptions of
100 acroa At s:i.t)6 nn acre.
Kino climate, good school,
excellent rullnny facilities,
low f relent rnteai Wood, wa
ter and lumber oasuy ob
nlnetl. . .
ir pamphlet "Last nottWeat,"
parUcularaaatoaultable locaUon
ami law seitlera' rate, apply to
Pupt of lmmlsroUon, Ottawa,
Can., or to Canadian Uort Agent.
f. T. ltoh.fi. Jl J Mow SL.arnt.Kaa.
IU RkUcMm, Drmrl)I,Vjttttra,3,&.
trio u. H, wm uo.por cent
rteMO writs to the agent nearest yea
haI LOS ANCtUCS-CAUMUJIl REALTT CO.
V VO GOLD NOTES
W DnialMUM.(10OlttO0O.!tmtrlll)tactOTy
SECURITY Some of tho moat advantage
oualr located real estate la rnpldlr grow
Idr Los Angeles. These notes liaro ALL the
attfety of a first mortgage on real estate;
With greater enrnlmr jpower, frequent Inter
est payments ami WITHOOT the njtcdcat'
Jienses Incident to mortgage loans. Write
or ILLUSTRATED BOOKLET. FleldlnfJ.
Slikon Co., 1 IS W. 4th St., Los Anie!es,Cal.
RQCKL.N & LEHMAN
FLORISTS
SIOUX CITY IOWA
Frsfi Cm t Flower ft Floral Emhltnt-
OF ALL, DESCRIPTION ON SHORT"
NOTICE. Order by Mall, Telephone or
Telegraph. OUR PRICES ARE RIGHT.
You Can Save Money by bvyhifl
OLD BUCK ROOFINI
direct from factory at manvtaaturars arleae, lritsl
praeaM, to your naaraat railroad town, let square
(ml u twrriii- a'U'A'R a'RT s E-orrrr
nilla and cement Included ready to lay. WHf.l
TODAY tor f res aamplts and prices that will cohyum.
BUCK MoOFINQ CO.. Beat, al . t. Layla. ate.
W. N. U., 8IOUX CITY, NO. 50-1011.
Medical Discovery
h usbbU (mm
mm
m
i i i'HssIi
UL " ' "-""mm
lessssK BaaaHesssasH "S
ororririrvrVT smokeless
I JL,ii JL.-W 1 lJLV OIL HEATER
Smokeless Odorless Clean Convenient
The Perfection Smokeless Oil Heater warms up a room
in next to no time. Always ready for tue. Can be carried
eaiily to any room where extra wannthis needed.
A ipecial automatic device makes it impouible to turn the
wick too high of too low. Safe in the hands of a child.
The Perfection bums nine hows on one filling glowing
heat from the minute it is lighted. Handsomely finished ;
drums of blue enamel or plain steel, with nickel trimmiajs."
Aik your dealer or write for oWripthra circular to any ateacy of
Standard Oil Company
(Inoorporated)
S" k.
flssfssssssssssssssssssssflL ."'kI
.BbSM iwalfi?..?. JT SSSSSBk.
SsHaV I vn:;;"' A saaaaaV
sbsSbSSSSW .......,,- .aEBBSSSBSSBaw
SaaaRsaaVl V:!.;;;; ISJsbbbbH
BBBBBBSBWbI Tm SBKZ9kllwYYSKf,
moH
ONK l'AIlt of my IIOTB' ,S.BOoi
H3.00 BIIOISH will positively ontwear-
IWO l'AlllHof ordinary boys' shoes.
fait Color Eyeliti Unit txcluilvtly.
Without a Rival for DRUNKENNESS and
DRUG USING. Address or Call on
THE KEELEY INSTITUTE
CORNER 33th. AND OA8S STRESS
T
ni
'4
i
TTf
-j,?ml
.m
-"21
rail
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