Dakota County Herald DAKOTA CITY, NIB. JthnH. Rem, - Publish Airships are almost Cingerbrend. as brittle M There is one thing that has not ftd vsnred la price. Talk Is as cheap as ever. Some married man must have orig inated the Idea of sending kisses by wire. Boston Is Inning many of her tradi tions, but she Is still thankful for bcr baked beans. Somebody wants to change the nam of Oshkosh. Kalamazoo. Keokuk and Kankakee are pooh-poohing the Idea. Young rhilander Chase Knox swears that he will go to work, if there Is no other way. We don't know of any. If In 1.000 years from now it will be possible to live 120 years It la to be hoped that It will he worth while. The minister who has resinned hM pastorate to become an umpire must expect his future audiences to talk back to him. Cardinal Gibbons says that the rich cannot corner Joy. And the poor do not have to suffer all the pain. Life is till worth living. It will be almoBt Impossible to coun- tirfeit the new French bank notes, ut we get this information from the designer, not from the counterfeiters. The ways of women are past finding ejot. The divorced husband of an Ohio woman broke his leg and Ills wife came back and remarried him out of sympathy. The Supreme Court of Georgia has decided that a woman possesses the In herent right to change her mind. Hu tnan nature continues to play a strong hand In Georgia. A New Tork cartoonist has been or dered to pay his former wife $400 a month alimony. This will bo likely to add to the number of young men who are learning to be cartoonists. Philander Knox, Jr., has begun his career as a married man by selling (wo automobiles. He has evidently discovered that it will keep him busy supporting a wife on $100 a month. Animated by a burning ambition to Co good and make his countrymen hnrpyi a distinguished Investigator hastens to assure everybody that the prices of things were just as high In 1837 as they are now, If not a little higher. Public charity is not always kind, bnt the order recently Issued by the Boston police commissioner indicates that he understands human nature, thereafter the names of families found In destitution are to be kept from the public and reported only to such au thorities as have a right to know and a desire to give relief. The inducements to temperance are many. A smal town recently voted to remain "dry" for fifty years in order to accept the conditional gift of a mil lionaire, who offered It an electric light plant, a sewerage system and, to cap the climax, a water works plant Other improvements of less Impor tance were Included in the proviso. All in all, everybody, even the million aire, is benefited. Four hundred and fifty-nine dollars la the amount which a young man working as a day laborer saved in two years. He had insisted in an argu ment that a laborer can save money. and to prove his point announced that he would save four hundred dollars in twenty-four months. He worked for eleven different men In that time, and the highest wage he received was forty Cellars a month. But he demonstrated that a man can save money it be Is willing to make an effort. Mrs. Martin W. Littleton's Bible Itudy class has evoked many imitators In New York, and society women, we lire told by veracious correspondent ire enthusiastic over the new depar ture. Quite apart from Its religious lignlficance, the Bible is a comprehen- llve compendium of literary excellence In which the most capricious mind can find satisfaction. Romance, war, gov irnment, intrigue, law and civiliza tion are all written into Its wonder ful pages. And, to judge from the Itorles that fill the newspapers, society trill be none the worse for a dally chapter from the Bible. The absence of moral training from the average American school Is blamed by many itudents of history for the present un lettled condition of public and private conscience. It Is, perhaps, too much to expect that Bible reading will not kbly Improve the present adult gen eration, but, if It serves only to waken tho public mind to the neces lity of teaching children at least the ordinary virtues of good citizenship, great good will result. One Dr. Btelner, Professor of Ap plied Christianity at Iowa College, In a recent address to the Young Men's Christian Association at Columbia University, asserted that "the nine hundred thousand immigrants who came to our shores last year served a far better purpose than an equal Dumber of university graduates un willing to begin work at the bottom tif the ludder." This Is one of those broad, sweeping assertions that learned lecturers like to make, perhaps to aicuse the flagging interest of their audience and the public. The immi gration question can stand upon its ov. n bottom. This country still wet cciaes aliens with few limitations, and a large percentage of the influx from fort-Inn lands become valuable citizens. But the national commissioner of lm titration says that at least two nun dred thousand, and probably more, of the aliens who curae here last year are not wanted; that ttiey will be of eo benefit to the country, but on the contrary a detriment. In 1905 Presl lent Roosevelt, speaking of lmmlgrar tfon, said: "Distribution of these aliens Is of little value unless there la adequate restriction. These Immi grants are wheedled and cajoled often against their best Interests, to come her." So It seemes that our Immi gration laws might still be beneficially amended with a view to securing a better class of Incoming population and to protecting the Immigrants them selves against cajolery and fraud. As for the university graduates and the immigrants, there Is no Just basis of comparison between them. If the de mand Is for the most unskilled class of manual labor, perhaps the humble immigrant la more valuahle; but a young man, native to the sell, upon whom his family have expanded lov ing pains, as well as money, to train In tho right way, nnd who has had the advantage of one of our great Institu tions of learning, ought to be more valuable In an all-rouni way. The complaint that scholastic graduates are not willing to begin at the bottom of the ladder is hardly tenable as ap plied to tho whole graduating body. Most of the educated young men now adays seem to be willing to begin at the foot, la any line thoy may choose, and work rp. This Is one of the facts which affords the most hopeful Indi cation of the future of the country. EASEBAXL IN CANAL ZONE. Game Ilaa tireat a Hold There It lla, In the I'nited Matea. Baseball has become as popular here as in the United States, a New York Herall Cristobal (Panama) cor respondent Bays. The American na tional gamo is now In its third year of prosperity. As a matter of fact so strongly has the game taton a hold In this tropical country that little cards reading some thing like tb?n are found in the offices of heads of -departments: "Notice All requests for leave of absence ow ing to grar'nother's funeral, lame back, house cleaning, moving, sore throat, tiirnlr-tt tho wringer, headache, brain storm, cousin's wedding, birth of twlnB, general indisposition, etc., must be hanfed to the manager not later than 1C o'clock on the morning of the game." The Amcrrctns brought the game here and it hi come to stay. Tho na tlves and foelgners have begun to take an Interest In the sport, and quite a few not only take part In tho "root ing" for the home team, hut havo learned to play. Two well organized leagues hold the chief attention, although a number of Independent teams have been formed. The two leagues are the Isthmian and the Atlantic. Tho former Is made up of teams representing Gargona, Ancon, Empire and the Marines, while the At lantic Is composed of the Commissary Subsistence, Civil Administration, Pa nama Railroad and Colon. Practically all of these nines are drafted from the men working for the government, but the class of ball put up Is excep tionally fast and the rivalry is in tense. The season opens with the dry sea son, in January, and the fight for the pennant will last until June, when the rains put In an appearance. The competition for places on the regular nines Is as spirited and interesting as those which take placo in the States where college men are trying for the varsity. Many previous college ball players are here on the Isthmus, and most of the teams are fully equal to the best of the college and university nines in the United States. Baseball Is bo American that even those who did not care much for the sport In the States take in the games here and there is no lack of support. The prices for ad mission in sliver run from bleachers at 50 cents to the box seats at $2.00. STREET NAMES LISTED. Ileaaoa Why Many Mlndlreeted I.rl tera Reach Their Destination. Absent-minded persons who write a name and street address on a letter and put it In the mall without hint of the town, city or even State to which it is intended to go cost the post office department a lot of trouble and money each year. Many of the par tially addressed reach their destina tion with little delay, the deficiency be ing supplied by a mall clerk. It looks like the cleverest kind of work when an envelope addressed to "Samuel 8tratton, 405 Colyton street" goes straight to Mr. Stratton at his home in Los Angeles, but a peek be hind the postal scenes shows that it is easy after all. The department has just iBsued a 900-page book in which are listed the street names in all of the 1,200 or so cities and towns in which a carrier service Is maintained. A glance In this volume, says the New York Sun, shows that the only Coly ton street known Is In Los Angeles. Another letter may be addressed to "John Jones, Woodward avenue, be tween Grand River avenue and State." More than thirty towns or cities have a Woodward avenue, but the only city in which all three of the streets are found is Detroit, Mich. The book shows It and the letter goes on its wsy. In the same way a letter addressed to St. Paul when the writer meant St. Louis eventually finds its way to the right address through the use of the Index. It is not nil so easy, however. The book Oils out a deficiency only when the name of the street is unusual. A letter to "John Brown, 200 Main street," will end up In the dead letter office, because of the 1,200 cities listed about 900 boost of a Main street. CheBtnut street and High street art also common, there being 400 or more of each listed. There are more than ;uu wasnington streets, union ana High streets occur about 400 times, and Maple and vVater are found lc about 350 communities. There are 30C PioadwayB. Thirty-seven cities have Roosevelt streets, twenty-one bear Bryan's numt and eight Taft streets are found, al though there Is no proof that they were named after the Presidents anc! th candidate. Names of prominent Americans of former days occur fre quently, but those of tho present day are less frequent. Carnegie street it '-vjnd In only three towns, and but two streets bear the name of Rocke feller. One woman can stir up more troublt than a doten mere men. 1 t.'L . YOU Minneapolis Journal. LOVE AND LIVE. All my past, life Is mine no more; The flying hours are gone. Like transitory dreams given o'er Whose Images ore kept in store Uy memory alone. The time that Is to come Is not; How can It then be mine; The present moment's all my lot; And that, an fast as It Is got, Phyllis, Is only thine. Then talk not of Inconstancy False hearts ami broken vows; If I by miracles can be This live-long minute true to thee, 'Tis all that heaven allows. The Earl of Rochester. "Oh, Ferd!" exclaimed the engaged girl to the engaged young man who had just entered the hall door. Then she threw herself into his arms and burst into tears. "Why, Kathle," gasped the mysti fied Ferd, "what's up?" "Oh, Ferd!" moaned Katharine amid strangled subs. "Did you ever see anything more hideous in all your life?" She held up something round, smooth and pearly white In color. "Think of wearing it! Think of It, Ferd! Oh, of all spiteful creatures, girls are the worst!" Katharine sniffed recuperatlvely and dabbed a bit of lace upon her discol ored eyes. Presently she was in a condition to tell her story. "The Alpha Zcta girls did it Just because It makes them Jealous to think that I'm about to marry such a splendid man as you. Th?y a.e, Ferd," she insisted, as the young man smiled a bit incredulously. "Though, In fairness to them, I will admit there Is the smallest chance possible of their having actually imagined that I'd like this frightful thing. "You see," began Katharine confi dentially, as she settled herself com fortably beside the young man, "when Clara Frazier wus marled lust June the Alpha Zetas decided to give her a handsome bracelet. And I gave In ray little $1.C0 I, who love Clara as I should love a viper. Do you remem ber, Ferd, when you both happened to be on the same train going to De troit a year ago? Of course, I know that you were merely polite to her, but she actually made so much out of your attentions to her when she told about them that the girls thought you and I were on the point of quarrel lng. Since then Clara and I have kept up a perfect (ctlon of friendship. If we meet ns often ns three times a day she always kisses me on both cheeks nnd, opening her eyes wide, in quires sweetly, 'How's Ferd? Well, to get back to Clara's wed ding present. I was one of the com mittee of three appointed to select the bracelet. For some ration or other we put off making-the purchase till the last day. By that time Carrie had sprained her ankle roller skating and Helen had to help her mother pack for a trip to New York, so I was left to choose the gift all by myself. "I had a perfectly miserable time. Ferd. .All the way downtown I jug gled possible and Impossible designs up and down in my mind. By the time the salesman begau bringing out tray after tray of bracelets for my in spection I was utterly confused. "UT course, some of them were dreuins. There were gay Parisian de signs and hand-wrought orientals. I saw a sliver bracelet set with tur quoise, native drilled and warranted never to fade. There was a beauty in rose gold with enamel flower tracings and sttids of pearls. But did I select one of these? Never! "I waved aside all tho lovely ones nnd chosn a silver1 bended affair. It was an unly Wall of Troy puttt rn set with eight lapis lazulis and three cream jades. There wasn't a bit of high light on the article. Altogether It was the ngllest bracelet I ever saw in all my life except thU one here. "I was ashamed fo think what the handsome young salesman might con clude about my Intellect, so 1 told him that the bracelet was not for me but for an elderly person of peculiar tastes. Of course, 25 Is elderly, and If Clara weren't odd she never would have dreamed that she could make that sweet-minded Billy Thompson happy for life. "As I exected, the girls all looked rather shocked when I opened the , while velvet box for their inspection; I Wedding Gifts TESTEHDAY3. AND "ANOTHER FELLOW" BUILT but though the praises were tame, no serious complaints were lodged, bo the bract-let "was sent to Clara." ' Tears were In Katharine's voice as she went on. "Ferd, we received a wedlng present to-day!" She crushed tightly In her hand the white velvet box. Inside was an Alpha card. There were also the same beaded silver and the same Wall of Troy, with eight lapis lazulis and three cream jades! A twin monstrosity to the bracelet 1 selected for Clara!" Tears rolled down her cheeks. "Oh, I'm nearly through crying,"' she declared, "but I want to tell you, Ferdinand Augustus Milton Stoll, that you can Just make up your mind to use this bracelet to chain on the cover of the ash can or bolt the kitchen door. It may do to tie up the bull pup. As for my wearing it " She rose impulsively and the white velvet box went spinning across the room. The bracelet rolled out and lay on the rug. "Oh, Ferd," sobbed Katharine, as she sank pathetically back on the divan, "wouldn't you be awfully afraid THE VICUT SAME THING. to marry me to-morrow if I were as spiteful as some girls?" Chicago News. Still Learning;. Three weeks before his death, when he was nearly 80 years old, Corot, the painter, said to a friend: "You have no idea of .the things I could paint now. I see what I have never seen before. It seems to me that I could never before have been able to make a sky. That which Is before me is much rosier, profounder, more trans parent. Ah, if I could show you these immense horizons!" In "Corot and His Friends" Everard Meynell gives Albert Wolffs picture of the aged ar tist. He wrote in 1884: Only nine years ago one could still, on summer days, seo one of the most touching spectacles an artist has ever given to his time. An old man. come to the completion of a long life, his white hair aureoled lu reflections, clothed In a blouse, shel tered under a parasol, sat, attentive as a scholar, trying to surprise some secret of nature that had escaped him for seventy years, smiling at the chat ter of the birds, and now and then throwing them the bar of a song, as happy to live and enjoy the poetry of the fields as he had been at 20. Old as he was, this great artist still hoped to be learnlug; for hnlf a cen tury he had been studying the works of creation, and every day they made a revelation to him; for, thought this old man. there enn never be an abso lute mastery In u it, and a lifetime Is not long enough to study all the ex presslons of the face of the earth. "Two good studies must be made," he sii Id, "or I will break my palette and brushes." And, later on, "I hope with all my heart there will be paint ing in heaven." v lear Moaejr. Mrs. Anthony Hoje, American wife of the well known English novelist, la as celebrated as her husband for her bon-moU. At a dinner In New York on her American visit, the young lady ex pressed her disapproval of mercenary marriages. Never marry for money," she uij. "You can borrow cheaper." Pfflfe wr A BOAT. AN INTELLIGENT REPTILE. Do animals possess the power of logical judgment, or, as we oftener say, reason? Naturalists and others have long debated the question, and are still divided. A writer In Science, without committing himself on the point, tells what he saw on a country read In Georgia, and every reader will agree with him that it was remark able. A commotion In the underbrush be side the road attracted his attention. He investigated the cause, and saw a coachwhlp snake about four feet long struggling with a lizard less than a foot long. They were not fighting; the snake was trying to eat the lizard. Occasionally the lizard would get away, but tho snake would at once give chase and recapture him. The snake invariably caught his prey by the bedy; he acted ns if he knew that if he seized him by the tail the lizard would break off the tail and escape. Finally the lizard, escaping from the snake, darted up a tree; the snake fol lowed. Here the four jointed legs of the lizard gave him the advantage. After darting up the tree a short dis tance he paused and glanced back ward. As often as the snake approach ed he would again dart forward, stop, and look backward; this happened sev eral times. Then all of as sudden, the snake dropped to the ground. The lizard continued to gaze downward. About a foot from the tree on which the liz ard was resting, head downward, there stood another tree. Spirally- up this tree the snake climbed until it was a few inches above the level of the lizard, which was still gazing scru tinizingly downward. Quietly and quickly the snake ex tended the front of Its body, and with a sudden thrust of its head knocked the lizard to the ground, and before It had time to recover from the unex pected blow the snake had dropped to the ground and recaptured it. MEDICINE AND THE PRESS. Gaud Deal of I'njuatlflalile TnlU About .eiup lllandcrm. One of the medical journals devotes a long and scornful article in Its cur rent issue to the anatomical and path ological blunders of newspapers. Some of those blunders, it. must be admit ted, have no little richness of humor. A small western paper, for example, recently accused a man of dying of "pleurisy of the brain." Another an nounced that a sick man, locality prominent, was recovering from a bad attack of staphlocous (staphylococ cus?) A third paper, this time in the south, recorded a case of "petrification of the heart." News of other hair raising marvels, of incredible mala dies and impossible operations crops up every day on all sides. It is to be lamented, of course, says the Baltimore Sun, that newspapers are not more accurate in their medical and chlrurglcal reports, but the fault, we believe, is not always theirs. Too often the doctors who laugh so loudly are to blame. Many of them still cling to the ancient hocus-pocus of the me diaeval leeches. Medicine, as it is practiced, is still marked by mean ingless incantations, absurd circum locutions, unintelligible dog Latin. The young doctors like to roll sound ing words upon their tongues that they may cause the vulgar to marvel, and too often they are never cured of the vice. Just observe the bull itlcs issued by the learned consultants while a great man" lies dying. Vary often they rre entirely incomprehen sible, despMe the fact that the infor mation thev ordinarily convey jilght be expressed very well In language easily understood by any layman. No; the newspapers are not always to blame for their medical errors and when they are their blunders do a great deal less harm than those of the doctors themselves. A newspaper never gouges out the wrong eye or cuts off the wrong leg. Its mistakes ll diagnosis fill no graveyards. It may be comic, but It is never homlcid-11. Man of Kinerlfuce. His Daughter Daddy, you were 21 wheu this wns taken, weren't you? Why, you might have sat for It yes terday. Her Father M'yes your mother's own daughter. Well, well, you'll And It on the table, I think. His Daughter Kind what, daddy darling? Her Father The checkbook, my own lamb. The Sketch. A small boy's Idea of an entertain ment Is any kind of a gathering where refreshments are served. GOOD SHORT STORIES Among applicants for service as a general housemaid In a Pittsburg fam ily was a rawboncd Irish girl of rather forbidding aspect. "Do you love chil dren?" asked the mistress of the house, when satibfied that tho pirl would suit with respect to most requirements. "Well, muni," responded the Celt, with a grim smile, "that all depends on the wages." A clerk In Belgrade, Servla, named VtlUlaw Simonovltch, on the strength of nn Increase of salary, recently tel egraphed to a young woman of Los nitsa and asked her to share his for tunes. The rgulatlon tax allows ten words for the minimum fee, and her answer ran: "Yea, gladly, willingly, Joyfully, delightedly, gratefully, loving ly, yes, yes, yes.". William Travers Jerome, when dis trlct attorney of New York, went down to Georgia to address the Georgia Bar Association. Col. Peter Mtldrim was showing Jerome around. "You see that man," said the colonel, pointing out a distinguished person who sat on the hotel porch. "I do." "Well, suh, that Is a man in whom our state takes great pride. He is Judge , suh, tho only man in Georgia who can strut sitting down." M. Paul was a grocer. Rats overran his city, and a price of two sous a head was placed upon them by the town council. M. Paul's errand boy, working early and late, managed to slay ninety rats in the cellars and at tics of the shop. The boy took his prey to the city hall, and, returning to the grocery Jubilant, showed M. Paul the nine francs he had gained. The grocer held out his palm. "Hand the money here," he said. "You know very well those rat3 were mine, not yours." William, a little country boy of six, was snowbound with his mother at the house of an aunt, twenty miles from his own home. Tho two, who had driven over In a sleigh Just to spend the day, were forced to remain three nights and were supplied by the host ess with garments to Bleep in. There being no small boys In his aunt's family, William was put to bed in one of his little cousin Deborah's night gowns, very indignant at having to wear anything with so many frills and lace trimmings around the neck and on the sleeves. "I won't stand it, mum mer," he loudly protested on the sec ond night. "I won't wear anything so glrly! I'll run away, you see if I don't, and perish in a snowdrift be fore I'll put that thing on again. Why, rather than wear that that valentine nightgown I'll sleep raw!" Briskly enters the sleek-looking agent, approaching the desk of the meek, machine-looking man and opening one of those folding thingum ajigs showing styles of binding. "I believe I can Interest you In this mas sive set of books containing the speeches of the world's greatest ora tors. Seventy volumes, $1 down and 51 a month until the price, $GS0, has been paid. This set of books gives you the most celebrated speeches of the greatest talkers the world has ever known and " "Let me see the in dex," says the meek man. The agent hands it to him and he looks through it carefully and methodically, running his finger along the list of names. Reaching the end, he hands the Index back to the agent and says: "It Isn't what you claim it is. I happen to know the greatest talker in the woild. and you haven't her In the index." USE FOR SPIDER'S NEST. Mexican Nallven Mnke of It a Item eily Airalnat the Fly I'laxae, It is perhaps difficult to account for the fact that certain very harmless fellow creatures of ours are almost invariably looked upon with repulsion if not with absolute horror. The num ber of individuals who care to have snakes as pets is comparatively few, and those who are Interested In spi ders must form even a smaller class. Sentiment is occasionally powerful enough Indeed to overcome antipathy to what is loathsome. There are parts of Britain in which even a member of the so-called weaker sex will view with equanimity a red spider running over her sleeve, whereas Bhe would tread remorselessly under foot the common or garden variety. For the red spider is a precursor of wealth. The utility of the spider, the fact that it has a part to play in the econ omy of nature, Is very slowly being recognized in this country, but there are regions of the world where senti ment has given place to the convic tion that certain classes at any rate of the insect play a role that Is, both useful and beneficial to man. ' M. L. Dlguet, who has been on a mission In a district of Mexico which he calls Miehoacan, has brought back tidings of a spider's nest which is used by the natives for self-protection during the rainy season and which forms a notable addition to the adorn ment of the rooms in which they live. In the Bulletin de la Societe Nationals d'Aeellruatation, he describes the mos quero, as it a called, which has been used aa a remedy for the fly plague from time immemorial. At the be ginning of the rainy season the exodus from the villages begins. The inhab itants stream up the wooded hillsides, and the picture he draws of the long procession of brunches, each of which contains one or more coveted mos quero, reminds one of the wood of Dunsinane. The nests are large enough to cover a space of a couple of square yards and are like a huge sponge. This is strung to the branches by thick threads which act as cables.' Theu come the thinner and sticky rope-t which are to act as catchers of the harmful, unnecessary fly. The Inside of the nest is simply a mesh of Interwoven lines pierced with passages and galleries all kept in a state of perfect sweetness by a tiny parasite, one of the colnoptera, swarms of which live and move, have their being and find their nurture within Its recesses. The season goes on, the est increases concentrically la else As each capture is made It Is secured by fxeshly made webs and the re mains, after host nnd parasite have satisfied their appetites, becomes an Integral part of the surface of the nest. Westminster Gazette. WOMEN SHOULD SWIM. It In the Only Way to hecure a Tor. feet I 1(4 ore, huym ll:tonlnn. That any woman can swim herselt Into good If not a perfect figure is the belief of Miss Beatrice Street, Instruct or in the public swimming tanks at Brookllne, the woman who teaches all the children in Brookline to swim, Phoebe Dwight bays in tho Boston Traveler. And when I saw what MUts Street had accomplished for herself I did not wonder at her confidence in the won ders her art can work, especially after she told me that she had at one time been slight to the verge of ungalnll ness. Miss Street, who lias the repu tation of being one of th most perfect ly built women in Massachusetts, is not tall five feet and three-quarterj in her swimming suit but she has 6 figure so perfectly formed and carrloa that one is not tno least bit conscious of her shortness. But Miss Street does not believe In working with the direct object of a good figure. "Swimming gives a wom an a good figure because it develops her or trims her down Into a perfect ly normal or healthy condition," she explained. "If she's too fat it makes"' her thinner. If she's too thin it gives her muscular development. One should work to be healthy and the good figure will be a natural result." "Nothing In excess," Is one of this athletic young woman's favorite mot toes. "It Isn't good to try to either lose or gain weight too fast," she said. "When a person tells me she has tak en off forty or fifty pounds in a year I know she can't be In a very good condition. And In the same way I don't think it pays to put on flesh too rapidly. The weight you gain slowly Is the good, ealthy weight that will stand by you. "Swimming cannot possibly hurt any one, except eomo one with a very weak heart Any one can learn to swim and swim well. Long-distance swimming is, of course, a matter of endurance and strength, but any one can learn to swim short distances easi ly," Is Miss Street's dictum. "Why, when you realize that we have suc ceeded In teaching even cripples and partially paralyzed people to swim you can see that no ordinary person can have any excuse for not being abls to learn to swim well." RIVERS AS BATE REGULATORS. ronalbilttles In Competition Well Known by Railway Manager, Senator Clark of Arkansas, perhapi humorously, suggests that the nation al government, instead of making ap propriations to improve the Missouri, might spend the money to build two railroads paralleling the river. With out going into the practicabilities ol this original Idea it is enough to say that the Senator loses sight of on jof the .largest, considerations in tin case, and that is the establishment oi low freight rates on a stable basis, Even in their present unimproved condition the navigable rivers of tht Mississippi valley are some protection against excessive railroad charges, tht St. Louis Globe-Democrat says. The rivers, though much as nature made them, offer possibilities in competition and. railway managers are not un mindful of the point where freight rates would arouse the river interest to action. Senator Clark does not saj what should be done with the two railroads when completed. Thej would be a large order if used to Initiate the policy of government own ership. If leased to private corpora tions, the freight rates would be all that the traffic would bear, with tht understanding that the improvement of the Missouri had been abandoned and the hope of adequate river compe tition extinguished. Some of the members of the Senate committee on commerce treat water way Improvement as a problem in the experimental stage. How is it thai the canals and deepened rivers of Eu rope are put aside entirely in whal these antagonistic Senators have tc ray on the subject? What, in Senatoi Burton's judgment, is the significance of the fact that 90,000,000 tons ol freight passed through the lakes las! year? Lake channels have been deep ened to twenty-two feet by govern ment appropriations and no one knows better than Senator Burton, who has been an enthusiast in get ting public money for the lake, thai the resulting commerce has increased beyond the estimates of the most saa gulne. Three times as much shipping passes through the Soo locks at through the Suez canal. There are Senators on the committee who hold the Mississippi and Missouri crltfcailj at arm's length as if the idea of deep ening their channels permanentlj were something unique and pecullarlj hazardous as a financial and co miner clal undertaking. Is the trouble with such Senators prejudice or sectional narrowness? The One l0leney. Matilda's Joined a rooking class. At morning I awake To find a fringe of herbs and grass Around my bit of steak. At dinner decorations strange Are floating in the soup. And there ale forks and spoons thaf range Just like a wurrior troop. Anil there are ruffles on the chop, And lemons everywhere; I know not where the craze will stop, In fact, I should not care, If all the viands thus arrayed With daintiness complete Could some time und somehow be maile Mure possible to est. Kt. Louis r.cpuhllc. A ( haiiKf lelreI. Mr. Grouch These biscuits of youn are like rocks. What, do you take nn for. an oat rich? Mrs. Grc.ich I wish you were, mj dear; then maybe I could get some feathers for my new spring hat.-i Jude. One of the surprising things in thU old world Is the ease with which sinners make money. J'-