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About Dakota County herald. (Dakota City, Neb.) 1891-1965 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 26, 1906)
THE OLD FARMER AND THE NEW. -. . -.i.jii mm. 'X-i j- 1 -. - --'' --','--- -- LD i Hi Wtl V LEGAL INFORMATION. Formerly the farmer went to church behind a pair of oxen. Now he rides In the Intent innke of vehicle nnd wears diamonds. Secretary James Wilson of the Department of Agriculture. WILL ONE DAY BE KAISER. Emneror'a I.ltle Cirnndson Karen an Uneertnin Fntnre. One of the most Interesting of the royal children of Europe, measured by the part he Is destined to play In fu ture events, Is I'rlnce Wilhelm Frled rlck Franz Josef Christian Olaf, son of the German Crown I'rlnce FrledrlcU Wilhelm and grandson of the Kaiser. This little mite of Immunity, who In the ordinary and natural course of events will rule over one of the great est, perhaps the greatest, of European states, came Into the world July 4 at the Marble Talace at Potsdam nnd was christened Aug. 2!), King Edward of England being one of the godfathers. He Is said to be a healthy child and a typical Ilohenzollern. Horn In the purple as he has been. It Is doubtful, however. If his future will THE KAISEU'S GRANDSON be an untroubled one. Tho task of governing the grent German empire Is becoming more dllllcult every year. The empire Is growing rapidly and Is now the most populous state In Europe, ex cepting Russia. Every year It is add ing nearly 1,000,000 people to Its popu lation. It Is also developing problems dllllcult of solution. To-day the So cialists, who would change the whole order of things and who a few short years ago were a negligible quantity, are a power which church and govern ment must reckon with. Already they comprise one-third of the male voting strength of the empire and only the unequal system of representation de Irlvcs them of a deciding position in the Reichstag. What will be their Mrength and what their Influence when the babe of to-day becomes tho Em peror of to-morrow? Itmg ere this, however, the present balance of the powers In Europe will probably have been changed. The Austrian-Hungarian empire will prob nbly have come to an end and the Ger man portions of it may have been an nexed to Germany. Holland, too, may heroine a part of the German federa tion. The Polish question has yet to be' Fettled and other problems will arise vbU h will render the position of the future rulers of Geruinny a dlflicult one. To be trained and drilled so as to be able to deal with these and other per plexing problems Is the destiny already mapped out for the little prince and it is u task from which the strongest mind might well idirink. Acquiring Natural Manner, Miss Spcltz Of course, no one could truthfully speak of her as pretty. Mr. Goodley Well er jerhaps not, but she baa such a natural, unaffected manner. Illss SpelU Yes, but It has taken her scferal years to acquire It Catho lic Standard. Ilia Opinion. "Mr. Skads, I will have to lose a day tomorrow; I'm going to be married." "That won't be losing a day; that will be waiting It." Houston Post. We neer tow the picture of a woman that we cared much for. It Is the real woman that Is attractl piwiawma a Pllipi imiwiim mail HiMiiiiWMjiiiiiiiilnwiiwimwi Mi mi I iiiimiiii m 'iwilllll , ml & ; v i i iy i . ,J J ' ' " V' .f-.x-i'y .A:.v:::S;::!':i. S-':-t-Wzte':vX&-:-x- m' ' , : a. " ' , - ' J4 I . I t ' " ' T JAPAN IS WEAK IN MORALS. Sen lit HoVfri-iHT la 1'ntil to lliiddhlaui In the lalnnil Kingdom. Japanese observers assert that nt present Buddhism has no influence in China, and the statement Is still more true of Japan. The average Japanese who has any conception of the differ ence between one religion and another feels that Ituildhism has a scant mes sage for the twentieth century. The real religion of Japan Is ancestor wor ship a reverence for the service of the departed ones whose spirits are be lieved ever to pour their mighty forces Into the life of to-day. To a large number of the more Intelli gent Japanese this creed Is no more satisfying to the spiritual nature than the anniversary of a funeral would be to us; nnd as for the masses, they are AND HIS PARENTS. slaves to the most blood-curdling su perstltlons, amounting In many cases to a worship of demons. In nn able article in the "Shin Jin" (New Man) Mr. Eblna contends that notwithstand log Its philosophical excellence, Iiudd blsm Is destined to be overcome by the practical efllcieney of Christianity. Jap nnef-e Christians are now exerting a powerful influence at homo, nnd that Influence has conspicuously followed the flag into Formosa, Korea and Manchu rla. When the main points of the eth les of old Japan, loyalty and filla piety, are consecrated by the soda service of a pure anil noble character, a great and lasting leadership will be assured to Japan, not only In states manship, but in religion and morality In this most vital point of all, mo rality, Japan Is weakest, and so long as she continues so she will lack one of the most essential requisites of a- sureil success. In assisting her to feel rightly on this question Christianity must prove a potent factor, i'.ut n present Japan's social morality is the greatest menace to her advance. liar jht's Weekly. I'ralae and I'rayer. The half-breed Indian interpreter with the Sioux tells a great story on Cbarlie-Owns-The-Dog, one of the most dignified of the lesser chiefs with the band. It was at Ilrlghton Reach and Charlie iwid the interpreter were taken for a ride on the scenic railway by one of the men with the show. All through the whirling trip Charlie le out a series of discordant guttura Bounds, and when the trio were safe on the ground again tin.' man suld to the Interpreter: "Charlie must have enjoyed It; he was singing all the way." 'Slnglug? Huh! Praying," came the answer. Baltimore News. Comfort lor (be Author. "I fear your comedy was a failure." "Oh. no." "I beard no laughter." "Ah. but between nets oH of people 'smiled. ' Nashville Courier-Journal When you lay an eg,', don't cackle I too long; get busy, and lay another. The Ilnakera. t was late In mild October, and the long autumnal rain Had left the miinmer hnrvost Gelds all croon with grass again; The first sharp frosts had fallen, leaving nil the woodlands eny With the hues of fu miner's rainbow, or the meadow flowers of May. Through a tliln, dry mist, that morning. the sun rose bright and red, At first a raylcss disk of fire, he bright ened as he sped ; Tet, even his noontide glory fell chast ened and subdued. On the corn fields and the orchards, and softly pictured wood. And all that quiet afternoon, slow sloping to the night. He wove with golden shuttle the haze with vellow Imht : Slanting through the painted beeches, he Kloritiod tho hill ; And, beneath It, pond and meadow lay brighter, greener still. And shouting boys in woodland haunts on ii slit climnsos of that sky, Flecked by the many-tinted leaves, and laughed, they knew not why ; And school girls, gay with aster flowers, beside tho meadow brooks, Mingled the glow of autumn with the sun- j shine of sweet looks. From spire and barn looked westerly the rintii'iif wonthoroocks 1 But even the birches on the hill stood motionless as rocks. No sound was in the woodlands, save the Rnnirrpl'u dronninir shell. And the yellow leaves among the boughs, low rustling as they fell. The summer grains were harvested; the stnlihlo-tiolils lav dry. Where June winds rolled, in light and shade, the Dale green waves of rye ; But still, on gentle hill slopes, in valleys frinceil with wood. Ungntherod, bleaching In the sun, the heavy corn crop stood. Bent low, by autumn's wind and rain, throuch husks that, dry ana sere, Unfolded from their ripened charge, shone out tho vellow ear: Beneath, the turnip lay concealed, In mnnv a verdant fold. And glistened iu the slanting light the pumpkin s sphere of gold. , There wrought the busy harvesters; and nmnv a creaking wain Bore slowly to the long barn floor Its load of husk and grain; Till broad and rod, ns when ho rose, the sun sank down, nt last. And like a merry guest's farewell, the day in brightness passed. And lo ! as through the western pines, on meadow, stream and pond, Flamed the rod radiance of a sky, set all nfire bovond. Slowlv o'er the eastern sea blurt's a milder glory shone, And tho sunset and the moonrlse were mingled into one! As thus Into the quiet night the twilight lapsed away, And deeper in the brightening moon the tranquil shadows lay, From many a brown old farmhouse, and hamlet without name. Their milking and their home tasks done, the merry huskers came, ' ?wung o'er the heapod-up harvest, from pitchforks in the mow, Khoue dimly down the lanterns on the pleasant scene below ; The growing pile of husks behind, the golden cars before, And laughing eyes and busy hands and brown cheeks glimmering o'er. Half hidden. In a quiet nook, serene of look and heart, Talking their old times over, the old men sat apart; Whilo up and down the unhusked pile, or nestling in its shade, At hide-and-seek, with laugh and shout, the happy children played. John Greenleaf Whittier. HOSPITAL CAR FOR WRECKS. Operating; nnd Ward Iloumi on Wheela Provided bjr a Hnllroad. In car No. 100!) the Erie Railroad has added n complete hospital on wheels to its equipment, says the New 1'ork Her ald. It is provided for uso when in case of accident passengers or employes are Injured and tho nearest hospital Is so fur away that operations on thv nyut become necessary. Divided Into two coinparrnients, the sixty-foot car has nn operating room fifteen feet ten Inches In length, equip ped with -jii Isaac operating table, with n movable head nnd foot extension, nn Instrument Htcrili.cr on the right and a surgeon's basin on the left. The car also has two lockers equipped with sur gical Instruments und stocked with ban dages, plasters, sponges, niuesthetlcs, antiseptics, astringents and other medi cal and surgical necessities. Four-foot slide doors in either side, with portable steps, permit of an easy entrance with a stretcher to the room, which has ten side windows and a large window In tho roof over the operat ing table. All are of ground glass and provided with white rubber roller cur tains. Two four-flame ncctylt'iie gas lights nnd two smaller ones furnish light nt night. A gravity water system to furnish both hot and cold water can be regulated by n surgeon with a valve ojieruted by the foot. Two sliding doors, with ground glass ivindows, lead to the ward room, forty three feet four Inches Iu length, equip ped with eleven brass bodsteuds nnd a lavatory nnd saloon. Boxes under the car curry crutches, splints, army stretchers, surgical Implements, wreck ing tools and other accessories. The car rests on six-wheel trucks. OoIbv lo Kslreuiee. "You ought to let that man down easy." "Why?" "Because he's so bard up." Balti more American. The greatest thing In the world Is po liteness. Aud no schooling is necessary to be agreeable; simply have a little consideration for others, Hid b quiet aud modest The right to mpvrsedens pending np leal Is held, In State ox re I. Gibson vs. Superior Court (Wash.), 1 1. R. A. (N. S.) fi.VI. not to extend to an ap peal from in order enjoining contin tied operation of n shooting gallery. The r'.gli of a city to require a li cense for the use of street by a tele phone company Is denied. In Wisconsin Telephone Company vs. Milwaukee (Wis.), 1 L. R. A. (N. S.) rSl. where the sta;ut, authorizes the company to use the streets. A carrier having led passengers to Ih'Hcvp that the doors of the vestibule to a car would be kept closed between stations and then negligently left tho doors open was held liable, In Cran tlall vs. Mlnneajiolls, St. P. & S. M. It. Co. (Minn.), 2 L. R. A. (N. S.) 043, to a passenger Injured thereby. Funds of nn Insolvent bank on de posit with a correspondent bank are held, In Clark vs. Toronto Bank (Kas.), 2 I.. R. A. (N. S.) S:i, to pass to the receiver rather than the holder of a draft Issued before the appointment of the receiver, but not presented until after the drawee bad notice of the re ceivership. A right of action for trespass for failure to provide the seat called for by u (heater ticket Is denied, In Homey vs. Nixon (Pa.). 1 I It. A. (N. S.) 11S4, upon the ground that the owner of the theater Is under no Implied ob ligation to serve ihe publb: and that the only remedy Is assumpsit for broach of the contract. Tender by the seller Is held, In IkU vs. Hattleld (Ky.), 2 I R. A. (N. S.) oM., not to bo necessary Iu order to hold the buyer liable for breach, where the latter failed to designate the day of delivery, and was not present at the place of delivery called for by the con tract during -the time delivery could have been called for according to Its terms. The homo port, for purposes of taxa tion of a vessel owned by residents of different States, is held, In Olson vs. San Francisco (Cal.), 2 L. R. A. (N. S.) 197, to be that nearest the resi dence of her managing owner, although temporarily registered In another State, engaged Iu commerce on tho high seas, nnd never within the State In which the port Is located. A railroad company Is held, in St. Ixnils Southwestern R. R. Co. vs. White (Tex.), 2 I.. R. A. (N. S.) 110, to be liable for the proximate Injury result ing from misdirections given by its ticket ngent when applied to by an In tending passenger for information as to the best route by which to reach bis destination nnd furnishing a ticket in accordance with such directions. A purchaser who before purchasing a ticket was Informed by the ngent that a certain train stopped at his sta tlon nnd was given a time table also showing that the train was scheduled to stop there, was held. In McDonald vs. Central Railroad Company (N. J. Err. & App.), 2 L. R. A. (N. S.) D05, to have by contract a right to have the train stop at that point, rendering his ejection nt the last preceding station wrongful. It Pn' to He Amiable. A young man In the neckwear de partment of Marshall Field & Co., who had been with the firm but a short ttne, was one day waiting on a cus tomer who seemed to be unusually hard to please. The would-be pur chaser, who was a handsome, elderly man, tossed the ties about nnd seemed to desire any shade nnd stylo save those offered for bis approval. The salesman patiently displayed a varied assortment of the goods, deftly knot ting the ties nnd holding them out to sho the effect and tho shimmer of the satin or silk, searching through boxes for the desired colors, nnd, iu spite of the somewhat captious man ner of tho customer, never for a mo ment lost his smiling good nature. Finally n half dozen ties were selected, and, with waving pencil, the clerk asked the usual question : "Cash or charge?" "Clu.rge," replied the gray-haired man. "What name, please V" "Marshall Field." The new salesman almost gasped with astonishment, aud be probably does not know to this day that his subsequent promotion was owing to his sincere politeness and patient endeavor to serve his employer and to please bis customer, who, of course, lu this case proved to be one and tho same person. Saturday Evening Post. She Sciirea. They were very fond of each other, and had been engaged, but they quar reled, nnd were too proud to make It up. lie called afterward at her house to see the old gentleman on busi ness, of course. She wns at the door. Said lu-: "Ah, Miss Blank, I believe? Is your father iu?" "No, sir," she replied, "pa Is not In at present. Did you wish to see blui personally?" "Yes," was bis bluff response, feel ing that he was yielding; "on Tery particular personal business," und he proudly turned to go away. "I beg your pardon," she called after him, as lie struck the last step, "but who shall I say called?" He never smiled again. The Gentle inau. "Do and Don't." A few things picked up from a child's school book : Never say, I don't think It will rain." What you mean Is 'I do think It will uot rain." "AH over the world" Is bad; say "Over the world." "The reason why" Is uot only Incorrect, but doesn't sound as well as The reason that." Don't say "A man fell off the dock." A man might fall Into n dock ; but to say that he fell off a dock Is no better than to say that he fell off a hide. Atchison Globe. "Considering the troubles I've had," nearly every married woman thluka "I look pretty well." CRAZE FOR RICHES. The general storm of protest against "graft" or favoritism nnd dishonesty In tho public ser-vli-e has aroused a degree of attention from citizens even the most supine nnd good-natured. Adding to the Impression recently made by what ajwloglsts call ''muck-raking." Is the present exposure of fraud, cheating and deceit In the world of Industry and business. Tbe craze for riches has Infected everybody. "The butcher, the baker and tlie candlestick maker" are beginning to show evidence of their unsavory origin, ac cording to the old nursery rhyme. Another proof of the prophetic powers of Mother Goose. We must test, with weights and measures, everything we buy for food. The milk upou which the precious lives of children depend must be examined with minute cure. Bakers' bread and butchers' meat, sugar, coffee, tea and oil, vinegar, spices, pepper and ginger, all these must In looked after by the careful buyer. The stream can rlo tin higher th:in Its source. As long s fraud and dishonesty rule In business. In manufactur ing, In buying and Ke'.llin. they will rule In public affairs. The evils of graft nui't le attacked at the root. In tho lives and acts of men ami women as shown In their per sonal dealings with one another. When you ee a man who smiles over a s'.ory of graft In Killtlcs or In the public service, look out for that man. He Is dishonest. lie cheats and laughs lu li ki sleeve over bis acuteness as compared with the confidence of his trusting customers, craft In politl-s means grnft In business, line cannot exNt without the other. "Charity begins at home," says the proverb. So does honesty. WHAT IS "REAL" LIFE f Dy A frie id of mine said to me recent ly, p(":ili'iiig of another friend, that she was having her first glimpse of real society, I wondered If there could be anything real in society as It has corns to be lu these latter years. It Is a great question whether anything has intrinsic value. Value is entirely a relative affair and I doubt If we know It when we are actually up against the real thing, If I may use the most unpardonable of our unspeakable .4 g i ' I 9-. rv ' jk'.s An UBS. STBAITSS. tilling. It Is rather amusing to a steady going person who has thought considerably about the whyness of things to note what different people doom "real." I have actually known people who considered "real" and "swell" as synonymous terms. They would consider a woman In n tailor-made suit and correct hat more real than nn honest old body In a blanket shawl. In my humble opinion the real Is the elemental. I should say that life was most real when It has to do with the mere necessities. I should think we are closer to the genius of the universe ivhon In Mime Ntrenuous day's work than In the "realest" society there Is. Happily for most of us we are allowed to help In working out the destiny of the race, we are given work io do with our hands and for this reason we aro more real than those Idle society people who think, besotted creatures, that they are "real" because they have money enough to make them artificial. A great many people think that life moans noise and excitement the clatter of feet upon the asphalt, the ring ing of electric car bells, the clash of voice, the crash THE GRANDEES OF SPAIN. Cnrlona Cuatom of Head Covert nil" When liter Are Knnobled. The ceremony of "head covering" was recently performed by a number of Spanish peers, who thereby passed to the rank of grandees of Spain. The ceremony, Interesting on account of Its antiquity and Its historical significa tion, Is, like many Spanish customs, re markable for Its extreme simplicity. The peers who took part in' It were the Count of Cabra, tbe Count of Pln sencla, the Marquis of Rafal, tho Mar quis of Malferlt, the Marquis of Bena mejl, the Count del Real, the Marquis of Hoyos, the Marquis de In Cenln, the Count of Bilboa, the Marquis of Vlana and the Marquis of Tovar, who were each attended by a grandee as their sponsor. When thej had made three customary reverences to the throne, the queen regent, lu the king's name, bade them "Cover your beads and speak." The speeches which followed, Justify ing tbe right of each peer to the honor he was receiving, were for the most part Interesting excursions Into the past history of Spain. Tho first, which was also tho most brief, that of the Count of Cabra, may serve 03 an example: "Senora, If noblesse obliges me to re ceive the honor of covering my head In the presence of your majesty, I came here obliged by the merits and virtues of my forefathers, and with the desire nt lenst to Imitate them, although to do so In reality may, unfortunately, be lm Ksslble. I nin called Osorlo, Borbon, Ponce de Leon. Cnrrlllo de Alhornnz, Hurtado de Mendozn, Fernandez de Cordova, Gusnian de Mauiique de Lara, Bllva, Rojas, Alvarez de Toledo, and by other names us well so Illustrious that, were It possible to forget them, one would have to forget with them the his tory of Spain. "Piety, heroic valor, wisdom, states manship, In all these my forefathers have offered examples for Imitation; and, though It be not permitted to me to reach such heights except In admira tion, In my love and loyalty to my coun try and my king I am worthy of them." Tho other new grandees, soys tbe Madrid corremndent of the London Times, were far more precise, not to say discursive, In relating the histories of their families, and one, the Count of Plascncla, devoted almost the whole of his discourse to an ancient grlevnnee that Philip II. had cut off the head, of one of his ancestors by mistake "un tunesto error." Where II lark Means White. "If I told you," said a philologist, "that a word like white meant not only white, but black as well that It had two meanings, one the opposite of the other you'd hardly believe me. Yet we have In English many such words. "Cleave uieaua to cling together. It also means to cat apart "Let means to penult It also means to hinder. 'Let me do It' we say, add ing, 'I did It without let or hindrance.' "Fast means motionless The horse was tied fast' It also, means swift moving The horse ran fast' "Master means a little boy 'Master Willie Bell' and It also means a strong and resolute leader 'He was the un questioned master of that unruly hand.'" Chiropodists are satisfied to remain at the foot' r i Dy Ada C. Sweet. Juliet V. Strauss. Women aro born Imitators nnd will them merely because It Is worn by a MME. HUMBERT HOPEFUL. Pennlleaa, She Still Inalata that Alrthlral Millions Kslat. Mine. Humbert, who has been liber ated from prison, still sticks to her story of the mythical Crawford mil lions. Of tho 111,000,000 francs which make up the dubious estate, she has In actual cash eleven francs. The mystery of her parentage with Regnler. a tnllor during the Frnnco- i ill ilMC UUMUfcUT UlltUATEU. Geriuuu War, is true. Hulf she told at tho trial, the other she refused to tell because the apparition of Henry Craw ford appeared In front of her und warned her, saying, "Your fortune Is at stake; s;eak not a word." Her first hours of freedom were rather pitiable. She left Rennes with an empty purse, some linen and a handbag containing the toque worn nt the trial. OMITS HIS MAIDEN SPEECH. New Member of Ihe Commons Is Tauvht a l.eaaon by t'onMlt nenta. Few iieople have any Idea bow close Is tbe watch kept by earnest constitu ents uou the parliamentary perform ances of their representatives. About three months after the house met this year a new member, a friend of mine. went down to his constituency. He bad uot made bis maiden rpcecb at tho time, but be attached little Importance to that, thinking that probably he was more conscious of the fact thun was ODy one else. lie was soon undeceived. for the jiorter who took bis bag r.t the I station remarked directly the tvuor ttpfy 3Ar ! of commerce, the baliel of the market place. But life Is ft quiet thing, a deeply rumlaatlve, s'.eadily busy thing. One must get rid of ninny things commonly deemed essen tial, In order to be "real" I often think that tbe realest people In the world are those who, If, by some stroke of fate, everybody In the world should be made penniless and houseless, would be of most use. Surely tho men who can hew and plow and build would be the real people. Surely women who can ' cook nnd wash and prepare food and makeshifts for liv ing would take precedence over the Idle and useless ones. But maybe those who can do nothing would still plums themselves and sit enthroned and maybe those "good olfl wagons" who can work would go right ahead waiting on them and looking up to them. If I were looking for the real people I would look for the contented ones. No matter where I might nnd them, In palace or hovel, I should consider them the real thing. AMERICAN WOMEN. Dy Judge Lmmbert Tree. "bet American parents watch their girls In Europe." The atmosphere of "smart -life," as It Is known on the continent, Is contaminating to American girls. I sat the other nlgbt In tbe palm room of a fashionable Homburg hotel. It was like fairyland, with delicately shaded lights and splendid people gathered around the tables, talking, smoking and drinking. All tbe world was represented. There were men and women from Tur key, Russia, Austria, Germany, Italy, France, England and tbe United States. My eye sought out tbe American girls In that gorgeous, polyglot company. They were there In astonishing numbers pure, beautiful, and fault lessly dressed, contrasting magnificently with their dark er sisters from more southerly lands. But they bad capitulated to every foible of tbe salon, Including the drinking of stinging, parti colored liquors nnd the smoking of seductive cigarettes. This Is a most dangerous cradle for motherhood aud society'. In my Judgment, of all women the Americans thus far have been the least affected by the luxuries and vices of modern so ciety. It behooves the parents of the rising generation to look to the security of their daughters. DEEP BREATHING AND GENIUS. By Mrs. Ormlston Chant. Genius Is largely a matter of knowing how to breathe. Whenever I want to think out a great article I go Into a silent room where never a sound can penetrate. Then I take a deep breath, close my eyes and mouth and con centrate my thoughts on the main point of the subject I wish to write upon, and Invariably a glorious Inspiration comes to me. Then, taking my pen, I write an article which, bad I not known the art of breathing, I could never have com posed. Then, again, I want to write a beautiful hymn, so, re tiring to rest, I again take a deep breath and think only of beautiful things. Then, In a calm, sweet sleep, beauti ful visions come to me, nnd In the morning -my mind Is filled with glorious thoughts, which are afterward crys tallized Into n hymn. Everybody now realizes the extra ordinary benefit to health which results from deep breath ing, though few know, ns It was known to ancient EasK crn philosophers, what nn Important part It plays In the building up of a great nnd noble brain. buy hats and gowns unsuitable for friend on whom It looks well. able gentleman stepped from the train: "Haven't hnd the pleasure of read ing your maiden speech yet, slr we're looking out for It" My friend had to make a polite and pleuBant answer, for the porter was ft, most energetic electloneerer. Then, nenrly every ono ho met began with the accusing formula, "Haven't had the pleasure " until he was nearly mad.: The climax was reached when he asked a policeman the war to some place, and the constable having In most official manner replied, "First to the right and second to the left" changed1 his tone and looking severely at the poor man began: "Haven't bad the pleasure " And at this my friend fled. . Ho told me afterward that he be lieved . the fellow was fumbling for the handcuffs. The result was that the honorable gentleman came back to tbe house determined to Jump up all day and all night whenever a speech wns finished, whatever the subject was, until he had said something or other. His chance came at last when he was quite exhausted and when be had real ly nothing to say. So he said nothing at considerable length nnd now he Is quite a hero in his constituency. M, A. P. A Foreat of Giants. It Is almost impossible for one who has seen only the Eastern or Rocky Mountain forests to Imagine the woods of the Pacific coast Pictures of the big trees are as ccynmoa as postage stamps, but the most wonderful thlnjf about the big trees Is that they aro scarcely bigger than the rest of the for est Tbe Pacific coast bears only a tenth of our woodland, but nearly half of our timber. An average acre In tho Rocky Mountain forest yields one to two. thousand board feet of lumber; in the Southern forest, three to four thou saart; lu the Northern forest, four to six thousand. An average acre on the Pacific coast yields fifteen to twenty tluiiisand. Telescope tbe Southern and Rocky Mountain fcjests, toss the North ern on top of them and stuff tbe cen tral Into the chinks, and, acre for acre, the Pacific forest will outweigh them all. American Magazine. Appropriate. He 1 want to give Miss Sharp a palm for her parlor. What kind would you suggest? She Why don't you give her ft cactus plant? Detroit Free Press. Fast. The Soubrette You say you're not on speaking terms with the manager? The Comedian Prtrtsely. I slyai require a wiitteu contract Puck.