Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, January 12, 1916, Page 6, Image 6

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    niK BEE: OMAHA, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 12, 1916.
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THE OMAHA DAILY BEE
FOUNDED BY EDWARD RQ3E WATER.
VICTOR ROSEWATKR, EDITOR.
Th Be Publishing Company. Proprietor.
BEK BUlLDlN'i. FARNAM AND SEVENTEENTH.
Entfrd at Omaha postofflc as arcond-elsss matter.
TERMS OF 8VBSCRIPTION.
By rarrlsf
per month.
raitv and Pundur ...
Pallr without Sunday....' fcc...
I-Tvrnina and Stinriay v.
KvrnlnK without Sunday
Ijunrlair Hoa onir
By mall
prr yar.
tim
4 00
,
A. 4.00
1 00
?unniT nr, pnif. . m.w
llly and Sunday Hr. thre years In advance 11 00
Srml noilre of . hmu of ad.lmm or romplslnts of
Irreoilsvltv in delivery to Omaha Dee, Circulation
I "erartmenL
REMITTANCE.
T?mlt bv draft. jtss or pnntnl order Only two
rent stsmns received In payment of am all ae
rounts. Personal chrrkr, except on Omaha and eastern
echanire. not accepted.
OFFICES.
. Omaha The Pee PulMInc
Pouth Omaha SHU N alreet
Coun.-U Fluffs 14 North Main street.
Lincoln W l ittle Building.
htraito X"! Ufarat Hul'dlnr
New York Room llns. t-6 Fifth avenua.
8t T.oiilB-n08 New Hank of Commerr. .
Washington 725 Fourteenth St., N. W.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Address rommonlcatlona relating to newa and edl
luteal matter to Omaha Bee. Editorial Dspartmeot.
DECKMHKH CIRCT'LATIOX.
53,534
Ftate of Nebraska. County of Dnualas, aa:
Uwiaht Wllllsms, rlrculatlon manaaer of The Rna
Publishing company, being duly a worn, any that tha
avereae circulation for the month of December. 111.
wa B3.M4.
DWTOJ1T WILLIAMS. Circulation Manaer.
Subscribed In my presence and aworn to before
me, thla 4th dav of January.
ROBEHT HUNTER, Notary Public.
Subscrihcra leaving the city temporarily
ahoald have The Iie mailed to them. Ad
dreaa will be changed aa often aa requeated.
a January la '
Thought for the Day
Smltcttd by Kathtrint Morn
)
Look to thit day
For it it Lift, tht wry Lift of Lift;
in itt britf court lit all tht varittitt and ra(-
iiUi of jf our txitttnet;
Tkt blitt of grototh, tht glory of action, tht
tpUndor of btauty;
For yetttriay it but a drsam, and tomorrow it
only a vition;
But today, vxll lived, mates tvtry yulerday a
dream of hmppinttt.
And mry tomorrow, a vition of hope.
From tht Hantkrit.
When In doubt, piny aafety first by calling
a doctor.
Cold wave flags wigwag a message of Joy to
the ica man.
There is no mistaking the upward tendency
of the powder industry.
The See's advertising columns are the best
guide for January bargain-hunters.
A lawyer who can "run like sixty" wastes
his energy if beaded for the federal bench.
Pretty good bunch of people In that exhibit
of Omaha's bank directors, taking them all to
gether. Brother George ,W. Perkins is another lo
quacloua statesman who does not seem to know
when silence is golden.
Senator John Sharp Williams expressed re
gret that congress is compelled to meet at this
time. ' The Mississippi senator senses the ma
jority Yiew,
At any rate Nebraska bullmoosers are not
confronted with any factional differences as to
who shall wear the delegate badges at a third
party conclave.
"Our for el en policy makes us a laufliinf stuck
of the whole world." Ex-Senator Depew.
Yes, but It's no laughing matter and we be'
liere the American people are waking up to the
true situation.
An economic war of nations Is predicted as
an appendix to the present struggle. By that
time the average consumer may be so habituated
to war operations that an appendix will not
yield a thrill.
More married than single men reported for
service in Great Britain during the recent re
cruiting rally. Patriotism explains the differ
ence in part only. Eagerness to learn new fight
ing methods no doubt supplied an impulse.
la less than two days after the allies backed
away from Galllpoll the Teutons produced a
statement of the cost of the blunder figured
down to a pfennig. German efficiency and speed
shine in the bookkeeping department.
A pleasant party was given at the Dancin scad
rrny. Eleventh and Farnara. In honor of the seventh
wedding anniversary of Mr. and Mrs. P. Carey, host
aud hostess of the Doran houee. About forty couples
were preaent and joined In the merriment until a late
hour.
Henry Rhode, former deputy county treasurer, la
the recipient of an elevant testimonial from Treasurer
Rush la the shape of a sold watch as an expression
ut appreciation for his services.
F. 8. Parmelee hss returned from Sutton. Neb.,
where he was snowed In the Isst ten divi n.
he does not mind beins snowed In that length of time
when people have coal to burn, but cornatalka a're too
muin for him.
Charlie Lord will represent the Omaha lotere.le
st the convention to be field In Kt. Joseph to form a
r(em base ball lesgue.
J. V. Km, formerly post office Inspector here.
iijw located at Deaver, Is la the city.
The strike of the tee men was settled by the con
iranion of the demanded wat. ar.d the river it alive
wltii iik-u at aork cutting and storing Ice.
Among oth-r appioprtatlun lo the estimates of the
lounty board Is one for M.OuO for the retaining wall,
tracing and paving of the court house bleck.
That Harmony Mass Meeting-.
The Nocoln Journal takes what seems to us
the sensible view of the "harmony mass meet
Ing" railed to endorse a set of delegate-at-large
candidates to represent Nebraska In the coming
republican national convention when It answers
objections by saying that meetings of this kind
are In conformity with the spirit of the direct
primary rather than In violation of it, as furnish
ing discussion and recommendation to enlighten
the voters In making their personal choice.
Neither the editor of The Bee, nor anyone
connected with this paper, haa had anything to
do with the call for the mass meeting, yet we
are not disposed to condemn in advance any
move that leads In the direction of solidifying
the republican ranks Into the united phalanx
necessary to success in the battle of 1916. We
are not so concerned ss to the particular individ
uals who go to Chicago as delegates provided
they are reputable, representative and trust
worthy, for we are sure they will have pretty
definite Instructions as to what they must do
there before they receive their credentials.
4 What Is equally to the point, as the Journal
reminds us, the voters have a veto on any "slate"
by whomsoever put up and, if they do not ap
prove, they can and will break the "slate" and
register their preferences as they see fit as be
tween all who may be running. So everything
will depend on whether the "harmony mass
meeting" makes wise or foolish recommenda
tions for If foolish the) will be of no avail. For
ourselves, we reserve Judgment till the lineup
is disclosed.
Dutch Disturbing the Dovet.
Disquieting news comes from The Hague,
where the doves who followed the flight ot
Henry Ford and Frau Schwimmer across the
rolling brine find their slumbers disturbed by
the presence of Dutch soldiery. It is, perhaps,
no intentional discourtesy, but the Dutch were
certainly negligent in some of the essentials of
that fine hospitality for which they have long
been noted. They might at leat have provided
noiseless accoutrements and soft-soled boots to
meet such emergencies as the present. It Is wrong
that the cogitations of the peacemakers should
be upset by the grind and rattle of an artillery
car drawn! along a stony street. Why are not
these cars equipped with rubber tires, or, better
still, why not dispense entirely with these mili
tary demonstrations until the doves are a little
more thoroughly nested and domesticated? They
are due to stay in Holland for a long time, if
they wait until peace la accomplished, and it's
up to the Dutch to make them comfortable. Still,
it would be Just like the practlcal-mlnded in
habitants of the Netherlands to go right on, at
tending to their own business, regardless of the
disposition of the voluntary guests.
Troubloui times for John Bull.
In all their history the English people have
faced no such crisis as that now presented to
them. Division of sentiment on matters of policy
Is common enough among the inhabitants of the
United Kingdom, and civil war haa frequently
been waged In settlement of questions not so
momentous as those now involved. With re
verses to the army abroad, disasters to ships at
sea, and discontent verging on revolt at home,
the government has on its hands a task that will
require the wisest of statesmanshln to adjust.
The keenest of political acumen will not excoed
the requirements of directing the present dis
cordant forces into the harmonious action that
must be had for the preservation of the empire.
Blunders may be forgiven If retrieved, and
John Bull yetihas his chance. Recent misfor
tunes ought to awaken the British to a course
less bumptious and more energetic than has yet
been pursued. Patriotism is not dead among
the people and will readily respond to a proper
call. Politics seems to be the most dangerous
symptom of the malady at present, and only
when it can be allayed will the prospect of re
covery be improved. The next few weeks will
mark an important era in the history or the Brit
ish empire.
Label on the Bottle.
The supreme court of the United States has
Just decided that the label on a bottle of medi
cine must not contain a patent untruth, or prom
ise to cure a disease for which there is no known
specific. This gives authoritative support to a
practice already fairly , well established. Prom
ises to cure Incurable diseases are certainly made
with Intent to deceive, end are not indulged in by
reputable firms or individuals. Disagreements
of doctors as to methods of medical practice are
briefly considered by the court, and are left in
the twilight tone, wherein individual taste or
predilection may still determine choice of ways
whereby to be cured. Some day the doctor who
profess to perform miracles will be put in the
same class with the vendor of nostrums now on
the proscribed list. Common sense may never
overtake beliefs In the matter of search fof re
lief from misery and disease, but it can protect
the helpless.
The New York World, staunch champion of
the democratic administration, refers to 8enator
Gore of Oklahoma "aa being more definite in his
opposition to the president than any of his pro
German colleagues, except those like Senatoi
O'aorman and Senator Hitchcock." If the World
keeps on this way it will make it awful hard for
these worthy senators to pretend to their con
stituents to unswerving devotion to the cause of
President Wilson and get away with It.
In reorganizing the School board commit
tees, would it not be a good idea to recognise
the usefulness of all the members Instead of
merely those elected on the cltlaens ticket last
year? With the enlarged scope and activities
of the public schools following the annexation
of South Omaha and Dundee, there must be
work enough to keep every member busy every
minute he can devote to duties devolved upon
Mm.
The only pity is that these wonderful con
gressmen of ours did not think to introduce their
various bills "to make war impossible" before
the present great war broke loose.
Doctors are too solemn to rank as humor
ists, yet they suggettt that preening the feathers,
is the beat means of losing your grip.
The Second Winter
THR upftare of heavy fighting on the Russo-Oaloan
frontier reminds us that winter In Itself need not
force a auapenslon of operations. There were big
midwinter battles a year ago In east Prussia, In
Ohsmpagne and on the Alane. If there Is a pause In
the west and In the Pal k ana It may be because winter
haa not settled down on these regions aa It haa on
Russia. But it Is also well to recall that the conflicts
of last winter. Impressive enoug by the standard of
previous wsrs. do not measurs up to the great encoun
ters of the present. The decisive battles of the war
the Marne, Ypres. West Oallcla were fought In the
fall or the spring. Ready though all the armies are
for sacrifice, there are llmlta to human endurance,
and on both sides the leaders have recognised that
they must have suitable weather before they can call
upon their men for the beat that ta In them. Winter,
therefore, la the season of preparation. The new
levies receive their final training. Ouna and ammuni
tion are piled up. Positions are mapped and studied
to the minutest point It was after a wlnter a prepa
ration that the British delivered their first great as
sault of the war at Neuve Chappclle laat March. It
was with a phalan built up during cold weather that
the Teuton armies shattered the Russian lino In
Oallcla in May. Now that the war has become more
than ever a test of engineering and mechanics, the
trenches sre for the time being of less importance
than what goes on behind the battle lines.
But the winter of 1R16 Is likely to witness a kind ot
secret operations for which the time was not ripe a
year ago. The men In the trenches will be thinking
of peace, and peace will be tn the minds of the leaders
and the statesmen. It Is time for Invertorj'lng and
casting up accounts, Bethmann-Hollweg did not say
the last word when he declared In the Reichstag a
month sgo thst It must be the allies who ask for
peace. The allied statesmen did not say the last word
when they reiterated their determination to fight to
the end, and reasserted the formula of no separate
peace That Is psrt of the game. Unofficially, we
may take it that some inkling of the terms on which
(Jermany would be willing to make peace has reached
the allied capitals: snd the other way about. Pre
cisely because winter Is a time of feverish preparations
for a continuance of the war. It la a time when gov
ernments may be Induced to ask themselves what
will be the advantage of going on. Germany aaya. In
effect, "I have another half million men almost ready
to take the field In April."' England aays. "Here is
snot tier million and a half men, volunteers and con
scripts, whom I rsn throw Into the scale." Russia
sets rather than spesks. Her armies, once more on tho
offensive, sre the best reply to the German contention
that Russia Is out of It. And within the national fron
tiers the separate governments are engaged In heart-to-heart
talks with their people. Food, recruits, taxa
tion, casualties, are the toplca that press for attention
In the long winter evenings.
For Oermsny, as she balances her books for the
year, the account standa somewhat aa follows: On
the credit side are her visible conquests In the west.
In Russia, In the Balkans; and the unbroken spirit of
her people. In the west she hss reached tho limit of
her offensive; but It Is not Impossible that tn the east
and In the south she may pass on to fresh victories.
On the debit side Is her food problem not Insuperable,
but still a problem. There la the consideration that
her strategic problem la not solved, but that the rln?
of her enemies Is still unbroken, tha Balkana ' after
Russia, and when the Balkana are disposed of, Russia
again. Prospects of a separate peace have disap
peared. At home there la a desire for peace to thla
extent, that a large section of the population does not
think snnexatlon Of territory worth fighting for any
longer, or desirable In any case. Germany is In the
anomalous position of claiming a Victory on points
and at the same time asserting that she can hold out
for years. A victory that needs years of untold sacri
fice to be demonstrated Is hardly a victory.
Among Germany's enemies the situation' Is still
more complex. If talking of peace Is a confeaslon or
weakness, they dare not venture on the thing publicly.
It would confirm Oermany's claims with regard to the
military altuatton. For Germany, holding out is to
some extent a matter ot choloe. For the alllea. It is
a matter of necessity. Time la undoubtedly with them.
But the time needed for a victory la so indefinitely
long, and the sacrifices necessary are so definitely
assured, that the alllea may well think It worth while
to bring about the meeting of minds In which tho
realities of the situation ahall be recognised. The
crucial facts are these: A decisive victory is in sight
for neither party. "Victory." when It does come, will
be measured by shreds and fragments. Both sides
spesk of holding out. But the statesmen on either
side must .have some Idea of what they are holding
out for. Knowing thla, they must be weighing the
bitter cost of holding out agalnat the risks Involved In
making overtures of peace.
On both aides there Is a great longing for peace.
An unemotional war critic like Major Moraht speaks
of the desolation of the winter trenches, of the severe
pressure on the souls of hundreds of thousanda of the
educated classes. Things are not very different In
France and Ruasia. The feeling Is not unknown la
England. It may be only a question of seeking the
way out The present winter will find many people
tn Europe looking for It eagerly. Generate may bo
preparing for a drive again at Balonlkl. against Egypt,
agalnat the German lines in Flanders and Champagne.
But we take It that men are also preparing some kind
of a drive towards peace.
Twice Told Tales
Aa laaallaat llano.
A hobo knocked on the back door of a suburban
home, which was opened by a large, muscular, hard
faced woman. -
"Oet out of here, you miserable tramp!" exclaimed
the woman In a acreechy voice, at the first sight or the
hobo. "If you don't march straight for that back
Bate I will call my husband!"
"I guess not." was the calm response ot the tramp.
"He ain't home."
"la that so, Mr. TrampT" was the scornful re
joinder of the large lady. "How do you know he Isn't
at horneT"
"Because." grinned the hobo, backing toward the
aforesaid gate, "when a man marries a woman like
you he 1 home only at meal tlme."-Phlladelphla
Telegraph.
People and Events
Rope skipping Is giving the tango a run for social
popularity la New Tork hotels. The correct aklpping
costume Is a flannel waiat and a short skirt, al
though bloomers are permissible.
A nervy crook pulled Into court at Sacramento de
manded a trial by a jury of his equals and sought to
pick a Jury from his fellow crooks. But the judge
called the bluff and the crook backed up.
Major George N. Evans, disbursing officer of the
Department or the Interior at Washington for thirty
two years, haa a record of handling Hu0,(X,0oi) with
out error or loss to the United States or to himself.
One of many graceful compliments to William
Howard Taft. prompted by the supreme court va
cancy, comas froro Judge Benjamin II. Hill or At
lanta. Oa. Judge Hill was endorsed for the vacant
seat by the Georgia bar. but auggueted the greater
propriety or the president naming .Jr. Taft.
The region of Green Bay. Wla.. Is fairly cool at
all seasons, but it fosters a few warm members. Pbll
Hseveis. son of a lumber pi uu, l one of them. In
the springtime I 1SU the young roan's fancy cen
tered on Miss Cecelia Bormaa. One day ha proposed
to her. Neat day he married another. The mlttened
maid wauls I5.W to soothe her feelings.
Thanks for Polish War Victims.
OMAHA, Jan. 10. To the Editor of The
Bee: We express our most sincere
thanks to his rmor, J. H. Morehead.
governor of Nebraska, and Hon. J. C.
Dahlman, mayor of Omaha, for their ap
peal to the citizens of our state and city
to help the poor and starving war vic
tims of Polsnd.
We feel profound gratitude to the local
Knglish press for the ravorabte comment
and the publicity given this noble cause
of helping the Polish sufferer.
And last, but not least, we thank ail
those kind-hearted people who 1n any
way helped to relieve the Bufferings of
the Inhabitants of Poland..
THOMAS KOZtOU
Editor Western Stsr.
The America Viewpoint.
BROW.VVIIXK. Neb.. Jan. U.-To the
Editor or The Bee: I muat take excep
tions to Henry Arp's German viewpoints
In The Bee. That Is the view ot some or
the Germans or the Boy-Ed brand, but
not all by a long way. There are lots
or people of German birth In the United
Statee who are true Americans, hut not
all. They came to the United States to
better their condition and keep their
sons out ot the kstser's slsughter pens
and not to pattern this country after the
fatherland.
Mr. Arp makes over a column or
charges against the . English speaking
people and does not prove one word ot
his charges. We Americans know what
made this country and what It la and who
has kept It aa It was given to ua. And
thank heaven f there are enough true
Americana to keep it as It has been
handed down to them.
I was In the civil war nearly four years.
There were lots of soldiers that were of
German birth, but they were true Amer
icans snd were righting for their homes.
They were not affected with the kalser
Itlo. In those times. I wonder If Mr.
Arp ever read the Declaration of In
dependence, the constitution, and the
history of the United States. (I tear not.)
It makes me tired to hear men talk
ing about being German-Americans, and
English, French and other kinds ot
Americans, ir they are true they are
Americans before everything; If they
are not true they have no business' here.
The Arp talk la all hot air of the super
heated variety.'- I want to tell him 'that
President Wilson Is an American from
head to foot and the Americans will he
behind him or any other president when
the laws are to be enforced. The trouble
with Arp is he has a had case ot the
kalseritta, which haa settled on the
brain and an operation might help out,
but I doubt it.
F. M. HAIROROVE.
R. F. D Route L
t
The Art of the Dance.
OMAHA, Jan. 11. To the Editor ot
The Bee: After paying real money to
see the recent performance of Miss Ger
trude Hoffman In v our city, and seeing
this said performance, I am at a loas
to express my Idea ot It In Chesterfield
Ian language.
If Miss Hoffman Was the possessor of
graceful lines, I could understand why
she might appear on the public stage In
the nude, L e., for the sake of art. but
no doubt even Miss Hoffman Is aware
of the lack of this quality.
It it was to illustrate the text that
weak woman could bring the mighty brute
man to her subjugation by her charm
and inflaming of passion in man, I think
we poor mortals are pouring oil on the
tires by patronising such entertainments.
Even I, as the tough-skinned repro
bate I am. could not discuss this toplo
face to race with anyone, and as far as
I can see. If Miss Hoffman cannot at
tract the crowds In any other manner,
she had better give up her ambition In
failure "for the benefit of poor humanity.
AN ARTLESS MAN.
Why Bother tho Postmaster.
TUTAN. Neb.. Jan. 11. To the Editor
ot The See: Since last Monday I have
had a great deal ot amusement tn read
ing the artlclea ot our new matrimonial
agency In Omaha. We realize the fact
that Postmaster Wharton is not in it
for a money making proposition, but
for the joy of making two hearts happy
that would not have been made happy
without his assistance. I em sure Mr.
Wharton is notware or the fact that
there are thousands of children through
out the United States that have a father
or a mother in aoma neck ot the woods,
they know not where, and eventually tlv
children become lnmatea of orphanages
and are later adopted out to people that'
naturally bold their own offspring above
the one adopted. As those children grow
older they begin to realise the difference
In the treatment of the children that
really belong to the parents. Then they
become dissatisfied and soon they hit
tha drift, and by the time they are 1
years or age they have made great rec
ords. Mir. Postmaster, don't you think you
are making a mistake In your effort 'to
furnish the Texas widow with a hus
band T First, I believe if the widow
is worthy ot a husband she would have
no trouble In getting one in the largest
state in the union.
Then, too, a man who haa to wait for
an opportunity of this kind to get a
wife from a rar-off country undoubtedly
haa aomethlng marked against his past
or he would have no trouble finding a
nice, reapectable woman in his own home
territory that would make him happy
and without bothering Mr. Wharton so
shortly after the holiday rush, which
has kept him working until late hours
for ao long. W. H. W.. R. F. D. 1.
Editorial Snapshots
Louisville Courier-Journal: This yesr
woman proposes. Man disposes.
Chicago Herald: If Mr. Taft la ap
pointed to the supreme bench the bench
will g-aln a great judge and politics will
lose a poor politician.
Brooklyn Eagle: The boy who gets up
at midnight to ryn four miles to a fire
and falls into a Well, breaking a lib, and
lies there helpteae uatll discovered soma
hours later, gets about all the trench
warfare worth while around Hempatead.
Boston Transcript: What with gold
flowing her form Europe, and our mines
greatly Increasing their output. gold
promise to become so common la this
country that they will soon be putting
good brass on the outside of It.
Clevelend Plain Dealer: Having raised
their aoclsl status by a measer Increase
In salary, the Pullman company appear
to lave made larger tips to porters neces
sary. It Is a rare madness that haa no
method in It. -
Pittsburgh Dispatch: General Shar.
wood calls the defense program "crimi
nal foolishness without sanity or ex
cuse." which should put him at least a
Inp ahead In the race of wordy patriots.
fcprinitficld Republican: The rumor that
Emperor William is suffering from canrer
will recall the fact that hia father. Em
peror Frederick, died of that diesse at
the age which the son has now reached.
But perhaps that fact has given birth to
the rumor.
Baltimore American: The head of the
Red Cross says how far preparedness
for national defense leads to prepared
ness for national aggression Is a question.
It Is a question essily answered In a
nation whose whole national Ideal and
public opinion are opposed to aggression
snd with whom the military Idea is a
subordinate proposition In the government.
LAUGHING GAS.
Mrs. A. I met Mrs. Swellton, the presi
dent of the Home for the Aged, today
snd gave her 110 for It. which 1 couldn t
well afford.
Airs. H. Heaven will reward you.
Mrs. A. It has already. She Invited me
to luncheon. Hosted Transcript.
"Do vou' know the nature of an oath,
madam?"
"Well. I ought to, sir. We've Just
moved, snd my husband has been laying
the carpets." Topeka Journal.
J KABIB8LE-
-! KABARET
MY FIANCP AAE7ER WAtfS 1t puv
ME A BULL JX SH01M b I
ACCETT IT?
NfeS-rrtS A XTWrr to
HAVE AROUND IN CASE Xxj
JILT MEVER a
The newspaper humorist went courting,
lie stayed late, very late, so late thst the
ol! man called down to his daughter,
"Phvlli. hasn't the morning paper come
et?"
"No. sir," answered the funny man.
"we are holding the form for an Impor
tant decision."
And the old man went back to bed won
der Ins if they would keep house or live
with him. Boston Transcript
"Are there no social distinctions In your
Americsn democracy?"
"Oh, yes. It wouldn't do at all for a
g.rl who Is sccurtomeil to a limousine to
marry a man who haa no means of rWi
Ina except a motorcycle." Washington
Star.
pro-
skina
y. l
Strenuous Feminist (pompously) My
osr sir, I have some pinna for the pro
motion of jwace on which I am
crsenljswl action. Ami, by the waj
want to propose to you
Hualness Man (nervously) Sorry, Miss
Pcpnor, to decline the honor, but I will
be a brother to you. Baltimore American.
"Now, wife. If we are going Into the
pnnltrv business here Is sn opportunity.
Neighbor Wombat has some hens he will
sell us cheap."
Oh. I wouldn't pet second-hand fowls.
Potter start with new models, I say."
Louisville Courier-Journal.
"Yes, sir; In case we were Invaded your
home would not be. safe: your house
nilsrht he destroyed, your wife and, chil
dren" Pacifist Say no more; I'll call tip my
Insurance event at once. Life.
THE JESTERS.
Pon Marquis In New Tork Sun.
cannot help It. we are cursed
Ith an Incorrigible mirth:
Although we too have saddened with tha
clouds that shadow
The disconsolate Karth:
Altliouiih we too have mourned with all
mankind the disillusions of the bar
ren years;
Although with all mankind we drink the
acrid tears;
Although we too have stolen cowering
through the nethermost
Dim crowded hells
Where In the common terror of doomed
multitudes
The vague ghost cringes, huddling towsrd
his neighbor ghost,
And each finds each the mirror of his
sins;
Although we too have sought beyond the
outmost bounds of space
A god of our Imaginings,
He will, his form, hra face.
To sink again with baffled wings
For that we only found familiar riddles
t here :
Still, in our ultimate
Numb moments of despair.
Still. In our desolate
Bowed anguish here beneath the whips of
fate.
Still, when we reach the dark way's
darkest end
And hv the blind wall drop with none to
friend,
Then, of a sudden.
Some perverse humor shske us, and we
laugh!
Some trick thought will grip us, and
we laugh!
Some rebel mood will seize us, and we
laughl
Ho, Jove! loose all your peevish light
nings from the height.
And slay me, Jove! but in the end some
brother clown
With desperste mirth will laugh your
foolish godhead down!
All W omen Need
a corrective, occasionally, to right a disordered stomach,
which is the cause of so much sick headache, nervous
ness and sleepless nights. Quick relief from stomach
troubles is assured by promptly taking a dose or two of
ielhigiinns98 Plife
They act gently on the stomach, livw, kidneys and bowels, assisting
and regulating these organs, and keeping them in a healthy condition.
These famous pills are vegetable in composition therefore, harmless,
leave no disagreeable after-effects and are not habit-forming.
A box of Beecham's Pills In the house Is a protection against the
many annoying troubles caused by stomach ills, and lays the foundation
For Better Health
Iarectioas af SnaeUI V.ku ta Wo
Sold by Drecgfats Thnmshob the World. la I
Every Boi
sos, 10,
25c
nrv u
UVV
1 223
0 7
Fast trains on convenient schedules
arrive Englewood Union Station
(63rd St.) and La Salle Station most
convenient locations in Chicago
connecting, with limited trains for
all Eastern territory. The
iisas IT "m T1 "tl
Leaves 6:08 p. m. daily. Have dinner on the train arrive
La Salle Station, Chicago in the heart of the business district
ready for the day no time lost.
Carries sleeping car for Tri-Cities may be occupied until
:00 a.m.
Othtr Solid Through Train Daily
"Rocky Mountain Idmlted" .... 2:00 a. m.
"Chlcago-Colonwlo Kxpress" .... 8:53 p.m.
Automatic Block Signalt
Fiitttt Modem AB-Stfl Pataengtt Equipment
Altoluto Saftty
Write, phone or call at Rock Island Travel Bureau, 1123 Farnam St.,
for tickets, retervationt, information. ,
J.S.McNALLY, Division iassengar Af ant Phona rfouglas 428
Persistence is the cardinal vir
tue in advertising; no matter
how good advertising may be
in other respects, it must be
run frequently and constant
ly to be really succcessfuL