TIIK HKE: OMAHA, Tl'KSDAY, XOVKMHKK U 1D15.
The Bees Homae Magazine Pa
Tifce Horse Show-a Blaze of Girls and Dappled Satin Steeds, Says Nell Brinkley
"The Soul of the Show Is There This Year the Colors, the Dash, the Laughter, Rattling Spurs and All tho Festival Taint"
"The thin little gosling girls with
reed-like legs in terra cotta breeches.
Tlie artillery officers, the pretty women (the busy and the Idle) and the
feathers."
'Phoning a Man Out
of a Position
By DOROTHY DIX
"Buy," asked the Bookkeeper, "did you
hear tho going over the .boss gave the
new clerk who was handing out sweet
talk to his girl over the telephone? The
old man was red-headed, and what he
said raised a blister. ,
"He told that
soft guy that If
he thought this
was a matrimonial
bureau he had an
other guess and a
rnive-on coming to
him. an that If
he had any lady
friends he wanted
to tip them otr
that this telephone
was for business
purposes only. See 7
"He's dead right."
said the Stenog
rapher, "If I were
an employer I
wouldn't stand for
the love making
over the wire In business hours, either
Jf Romeo wanted to Jolly his Juliet, he d
have to defer the pleasure of telling her
he never loved before, and could never
love again, until after quitting time. I d
about as soon have an employe with the
drug habit as the telephone habit.
"It isn't being afflicted with telephon
es yourself thst gets you in bad.
agreed the Bookkeeper, "it s your fool
and especially your .
who've got the leiepnono
friends,
friends.
Indigestion and
Stomach Misery
Just Vanishes
The moment "Pape's Diapep
sin" reaches the stomach
all distress goes.
Instantly stops any sourness,
gases, heartburn, acidity,
dyspepsia;
"Really does" put bad stomach In order
really does" overcoms indigestion, dys
pepsia, gas, heartburn and sourness in
five minutes that Juet that makes
Pape's Dlapepsln the largest selling stom
ach regulator in the world. If what you
eat fermenU into stubborn lumps, you
belch gas and eructate sour, undigested
food and acid; head is dlxiy and aches;
breath foul; tongue coated; your Inside
filled with bile and indigestible waste,
remember the moment "Pape's Dlapep
sln' comes in contact with the stomach
all such duitress vanishes. It's truly as
tonishingalmost marvelous, and the Joy
is its harmlessness.
A large fifty-cent case of Pape's Dla
pepsln will give you a hundred dollars'
worth of satisfaction or your druggist
hands you your money back.
It's worth its weight in gold to men
that gives you the double cross. That's
the reason so many pretty boys are al
ways out on a-hunt for a new Job..
"If a fellow wants to get queered in
business, about the easiest way he can
do it Is to have a lot of Mamies and
iadles , and ' Carries "calling hint up at
all times of day over the phone.
"I'm no lady's favorite myself, and so
I've escaped that particular hoodoo, I jt
I've seen plenty of good fellows get
sacked for no other reason than because
a lot of silly girls seemed to think they
had nothing to do but talk pink tea
chatter over the telephone. i
"I knew one fellow wha was the whole
works as an expert accountant. He was a
regular bear in figures, but he could
never hold down a Job because he was
simply telephoned out of every good
thing that came his way. About the time
he got busy of a morning, some bunch
of dry goods with the "hello" mania
would call him up to ask him who he
didn't blow into the movies, or show up
at the fudge party, and the boss would
begin to give him the once over out of
the slants of his eyes, and by the time
a few other relays of his feminine ad
mirers also demanded him at the tele
phone booth, the poor fellow was done
for.
"It was your-servlce-ls-no-lortger-re-qulred'
slip in his envelope on Saturday,
and all of no fault of his except knowing
a lot of women that were batty about
the long-distance conversation, and who
seemed never to get on to the fact that
employers don't hire a man to waft hot
air over the wires. I guess that If Mamie
knew that her Archibald got cold feet
every time he heard the telephone bell
ring she'd cut out a few reams of con
versation over Mr. Edison's cute little
Invention. It's no way to graft a mans
heart by Jeopardising his Job."
"You never know how Idiotic a girl
can be. anyway," said the Stenog
rsDher. "until you hear the giggles and
Imbecility that she pours into a tele
phone receiver. It's enough to burn up
even a copper wire. Did you ever listen
to the intellectual chlrpfest that a sweet
little thing will tear off?
"It'll go like this. Business of calling
ud an office or store, and having a man
stopped from his work. Boss scowling.
Man scared stiff. Then a voice over the
'phone:
"Mapping silken ban
ners, banked green
ery blossoms, shift
ing, laughter-struck
crowds, like a giant
harlequin."
The sweetly .stifling
!ark, the odorous - breath
from the rustling wraps of
pretty women up to their
eyes In furs."
The soul of the Horse Show Is there."
The Horse Show just what the words, mean,
so the Garden is. Can ypu say "Horse Show"
and not hear trumpets, the rolling back of circus
cUtee, the shuffle of slippered and booted feet,
and the rattle of spurs, the glassy tinkle of
woman-laughter, the vibrating, soft beat of hoofs
going 'round and 'round without seeing flap
ling silken banners, banked greenery and blos
soms, shifting, laughter-struck crowds like a
giant harlequin so varied In colors and restless
it is without smelling the sweetly stifling tan
bark, the odorous breath from the rustling wraps
of pretty women up to the eyes In furs, and that
heady flavor of something that intoxicates you
into planning how you can own a horse, and a
pretty wife Of your own?
The soul of the show is there this year, the
colors, and the dash, the laughter, the thin little
gosling girls with the reed-like legs in terra
cotta breeches,- the artillery officers, the pretty
women (the busy and the Idle) and the feathers,
. ell the festival taint and looming out of it all
tte guest of honor, Monsieur Horse, dappled
satin, and yearning to kirk the rail into whit
tling, all because of the fires and the youth In
his heart and legs.
How I Discovered Myself
Lillian Wald Tells of Her Settlement Success.
By LILLIAN. WALD,
Of the Henry Street Settlement.
Borne people after a period of prepara
tion announce themselves ready to take
up a certain line of work which Is to be
thelr's for life. My awakening was dif
ferent, a single Incident startled me from
the path I had been traveling, and I
became a settlement worker on a cam
paign for better social conditions.
Just the sight of a woman in terrible
straits and the keynote of my life was
struck. If today my work can be said
l tn ha successful, as I hone It Is. then
Is that you Archie? Who's this j ihen ( one tMng tht , havo neld t0
talk.ng to youT Don t you Know roe;
Don't you recognise my voice? Oh. you
naughty boy. Yes? this Is me. I I mean
I. Yes, it s Sadie. No, it's Mamie. He-he-h-e-e-e-e.
No, I don't want anything.
No, I haven't got anything to say. I
Just thought I'd call you up because I
didn't have anything else to do."
"Can you beat It? And what do you
think the man is thinking at 'the other J
be above all others, which thought has
been with me always my social conscience.
Out of that everything else has de-
In my own caae there was never any
room for doubt I knew Immediately
what I would do with my life. I had
the call, the Irresistible Impulse, to start
In to make up for time lost. I knew that
I had been meant to do Just that from
I the beginning of time and that was all
I there was to It.
i Perhaps my work brings me an undue
1 amount of satisfaction. It Is remark-
able to fight for better conditions and
' better living for people who are as grate
ful as the average New York East Slders.
Then, too, there seems to be a return
for every effort. There Is always an up
, hill fight and struggle, and then sud
' denly. Just when it seems darkest, the
sun comes out from behind a cloud and
J things are bright again.
To me ss I look hack my efforts seem
end of the wire?"
"Something wtth a big. big Dam It."
responded the Bookkeeper with feeling.
"And that Isn't the worst of it," went
veloped my great love of democracy and 1 very simple. There was nothing "apec
my success with my people. Into my tacular about my awakening, no great,
campaign I carried this one thing upper- blinding light after groping In the dark
most. I realized that serial work Is the ' for long days. but. nevertheless. It lias
expression of a social conscience, and been a peculiarly satisfying life work. I
that to accomplish what I most wanted nave always been thankful that my time
ind live
I must bury my own personally
a life of self-sacrifice.
This does not mean that I have not
been happy, for my life Is filled with ln-
on the stenographed; "a girl with a tcle-tereBt tn(l ntereat that comes from a
phor.e Is worse than Sherlock Holmes MoU1 ennBCtrnct, partially sstlfled. But
with a ciue iooui nununi m iwuuw uuw... to Mtllhitan democracy on a firm basis ; great opportunity to aid personally. I saw
There's no earthly escape for him. If one muBt practice self-sacrifice, and the great human side of it first, and
he doesn't show up as often as she thinks . through that I have come nearer to my I then I was plunged in and begsn to work
he should, she calls him up ana he has
before I began my work was not spent
In vain. .
All my training In the hospital work
stood me In good cause. The earlier de
sire that I had had to help with the
special burden was culminated in my
to make good with an excuse. It's bad
enough for a woman to keep tab on a
man when he is married to her, but the
telephone tab before marriage la the
limit, and explains why there are so
and women who can't get their stom- 1 many old maids,
achs regulated. It belongs in your home
should always be kept handy In case of
a sick, sour, upset stomach during the
day or night It's the quickest, surest
and most harmless stomach regulator in
the world.
Pape's Diapepstn instantly neutralises
the acids In the stomach, stops food fer
mentation or souring, absorbs gases and
starts the digestion. The relief Is quick,
sure, wonderful stomach sufferers have
a pleasant surprise awaiting thera. Advertisement
The telephone puts Cupid out of busi
ness, for no wire connects with the
dungeon cell."
"I don't believe In love-making over
the telephone anyway," said the Book
keeper. "Same here," responded the Stenog
rapher. "I don't want any man making
love to me with his mouth a thousand
miles off."
"Rlght-o," agreed the " Bookkeeper,
bending a little closer.
Idealldeal than I could have In any other
way.
It Is true that a groat many people
In this husy world never find themselves
at all until It Is too late to do any real
good with their lives. This seems a
a way out to the best of my ahll ty for
the suffering humanity around me.
From the day that I moved to the East
Side to take up my abode with the peo-
" was nenrerorth to help end
cuurage i nave never dreamed of
en-
tragedy and a dire waste of valuably i mine; else but my success In my work,
tlmo and surplus energy that might be 1 ' myself honored In dulng my little
utilised. I pert In the great human problem. I hv
i-m-
But to those' who have established ,rld t0 sstaMleh my prlnclnles of d
themselves on a firm foundation and ! r"cv the best of my ability, and
are working out the principle of life i -""'" am not yet satisfied. I
building for themselves In their ewn
sphere, my thoughts have always gone
out with a greet deal of Interest. Where
the proper niche Is discovered there la
never any waste of time and material.
I have found It so and know it must be
so with others.
till keep on workinir. wMeh
a great privilege.
can
Is In Itself
(The next article in this series of "8ue
cer.ful Women" will be by Mrs. Austin
V . . .
i-aimer, president of tbe So
ciety of Political Study.)
In-Shoots
As a general rule, the unklssed girl
is an uninviting one.'
To be an
'ooks like a
amateur
rabbit.
hunter every man
The best wsy to conquer whisky Is
to let it die of old age. '
When we see a man with chin whlkers
we always wonder how his Jaw would
look without 'em.
Marriage Is Invariably a failure In case
of love that Inspires gun play.
Advice to the Lovelorn
Yonr Brlf-llesprrt Forbids This.
Dear Miss Fairfax: I am a hard work
ing youth of 30 and am deeply In love
with a very pretty girl of 18. Her father
(the has no mother), who Is quite wealthy,
eenii iu ne Tery jona oi me ana sanc
tions our friendship. Recently he made
a rather serious proposition to me with
out his daughter's knowledge. Knowing
that my salary would not permit me to
give his daughter the good times he de
sired her to have and still keeD her in
my company, he asked me 'if I would not
cceri money from him to spend na his
tisimhter and myself.
Now I would like your advice as to
hat is the best step to take In this case,
as I love the girl dearly and am sure my
love Is not In vain. P. M. U
If the girl you are fond of cares for
you she will be willing to accept the In
expensive attentions It is In your power
to give her. You would forfeit her re
spect as well as your own self-respect If
you permitted her father to give you
money to spend on her.
Thl.k Wfll.
Dear Miss Fairfax: I am W nnd love
a girl of 17. We rxi eMed to be marrlrd
next yeai. I see her often nnd take her
to places of amusement, but when 1
sugKent staying at home she eeoms dis
satisfied, and often refunea to nnswer
me. Kindly tell me wlmt I ought to do.
O. P. J
This girl Is so very young that rhe
In good taste unless you are engaged.
In the latter event a consultation with
the young lady's parents is always In'
order.
probably considers life nothing hut
chance for a good time, and hardly
prei lates the seriousness of love
marriage. lie careful to make no,
blunders, for unless you havo a wlfo
willing to do her share to make the
home, and who will work by your s.de,
you will neither be happy nor be ablo
to give happiness.
4'onsnlt Her Psresti.
Dear Miss Fairfax: I have seen your
advlcM to many, so know that you will
n able to heli) me. I am keeping com
pany with a nice young lady and would
like to love and kiss her. Would It be
proper for me to consult her mother as
to my wishes?
Such familiarity Is neither prudent nor
Hair Jinting
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Results always th
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o often found in
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Hum pie and booklet sent on receipt of
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Order direct from Kenton Pharmacel Co.,
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Insist on "llrownatone" at your hair
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Hold and guaranteed In Omnha hv Slier
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if
9
2.
aaBBaSSSSSBSSMSBaMBBB MsjJpjsff'
THE HAM
WHAT AM
In tho Stockinet Covering
An asoluWcs Armour ftatmr. PaUnt opplitd for.
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. . r t
Armour selected hams has Deen improwu.
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Juicy flavors are retained ana inum""
Whether yon buy a siea or vAo ham. Insist oa
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