Tin: HKK: OMAHA. KJJJDAV, AVMIL Hi. l!M3. THE OMAHA DAILY DEE FOUNDED BT EHWAHD ROSKWATER. VICTOR ROSEWAT ER, EDITOR. The Bee Puhllfnlng Company. Proprietor. PEE BUILDING. FARNAM AND PEVENTEENTH'. T-nttrti at Omaha postofflce an second-rlsse matter. TERMS OF SCHSCRlTTinV. Hv carrier per month. Me.... If.... a. i Hy mail ' per yar. . 1 ' no i . m i 4.00 2() vmPy and gunday... pally without Purtday.... t?venlng and Pundav Fvenlng without Sunday., Pundav Ree only Bend notice at rher.se of addrees cr complalnta cf Insularity Jn delivery to Omaha Bw, Circulation Department. RFMITTANTK. Remit by draft. epree or postal order. Only two rent alamo received tn payment of small ae enunte. Peraona) checks, except on Omaha and eastern exchange, not accepted. Omaha The Bee Hulldlns South Omaha 2ii. N arret. Council Blufrs-14 North Main street. 1-tnooln & Little Building. Chicago n Haret null.Ilnpr New York Room lina. t Fifth svenne. Pt. Imln-MI New Hank of Commeri-e. Washington 736 Fourteenth Pt., N. W. CORREPPON DENCB. 'Address rnmmunlcstlnns relatlnr to newa and edi torial mettar to Oroaha ilea, 741 to rial Departmeut. MAItCH CIIICILATIO.V, 52,092 State of Nebraska, County of Douglas, aa. Dwtsht Wtlllama, circulation manaaar of The pea Publishing company, belli duly iworn, aavi that the artratt circulation for the tnuntb of March, 1916, was ilnn. mvlOHT WILLIAMS. Circulation Manafer. Subscribed In my presence and aworn to before me. thla M day of April. IMS. KOBEHT HUNTER, Notary Public. CbacrlbT I earing tn city temporarily ahotJd have The Be mailed to them. Ad wlU be changed aa often aa roqnoslod. AptU IS Thought for the Day 5eecfeef hy A. H. Wafrhom "JJ ku aster known (rut eowrag, who will a J - J - - f II sowrwes pnnvipn jur popiwarwy. Where wii Bllsnt John LJnd when Victorian o blew InT Boost (or Oniah booiitlni gets farther than knocking. Whatever visa it may be, the city campaign will be ebort and decisive. What can It be that la holding back that overdue water rate reduction? About the only visible result of the flood of diplomatic aotei ii the fattening of the filing taeea. Neither doe anything prevent the XCleetrls ilght company beating the city dads to the rate catting. The lftaeoarl river navigation aeaeon la bout to penwwulch reminds us, What hat beeome of that barge Hnet Passing recolutlona after the fact conderau Ing Governor Morehead'a eleotrlo light veto la at least a. harmloM' pastime- ' : ; ' ' -' ' ; Garbage disposal la aoon to bob up again In Omaha. That la another question that will never be settled until it Is settled right. Considering the Irritating condltlona under which foreign editors labor, their frequent exhibitions of bad temper are excusable. Connecticut solons having rejected womsu suffrage br a unanimous vote, the nutmag (oses Its standing as a decoration for a suffrage, frappe. None of the warring powera of Europe are satisfied with the position of the United States, which Is pretty good evidence that we are not favoring any of them. L- 1 1 1 ' It may be inconvenient to serve as court commissioner without pay, but acquiring legiti mately the title of Judge Is a legal asset well worth the sacrifice. ; Holding up freight trains for loot is a novel feature of lawless life In the wild aud woolly east. In work of this class the west cheerfully admits a disinclination to match the pace. Viewed from the dividend angle, the Pull man company could well afford to aubstltute a full wage for the tipsters' money. A concern which has paid a uniform dividend of I per ceut for nearly forty years, and cut four melons ex ceeding the face value of its stock, displays a reach acroas the table surpassed by none. t Official inquiry Into the perquisites of sleep ing car porters lends momentary interest to a stale subject. Travelers are well aware of the lordly munificence of the job. Behind the quU rises the painful suspicion that the government squints In this direction as a source of revenue to make good the deficit in the national treasury. Tna iron moldtra held their thirteenth annual hall at falconer' hall. Theae who made up the mid. mlt-teee la chars wvre R A. Kataer, J Uddelt. .1. Taung. Ilaws, T- Barry, v.. H. t'hadwlck. A. Ula. mom, John lluaaey. William White. (I. Wateon. lf. A, Pal ton. who recently irtircliaaad the till eoary court houaa alia, mill at an early da,te erect un It a fine auaineaa building. Manafer Jerome Fenael of the Thureton lioae team ays It will be reorsanle4 and reinforced for the eemlng aaaaoM. f Dr. O. M. Oowell, who has Wen lonf and favor ably known hero. Wft for hla old hrne In Philadelphia, B. r. Smith of kaUa, who haa larss real ealalo holdinas In Omaha, la atupplne; at the Paaton. The finder of a aet of plana marked ' J. C. Perrlco" i rtiueated to return thereto U. C. liaaeett, U7 North Nine Wen tii Tho akatlnc rtnk band seronaded the Canfteld houaa laat ntht. County ' nark . L-e-ltt baa received from E, V Uy, arctilti of the new court kuuae, notice that tho plane ed apeclfKatluna for tba reUiulns wall are Uit fvrwardad. King Cotton Feeling' Better. For an Individual who was all but knocked out four months aso, and reduced to panning (he hat for charity. King Cotton Is feeling very fit just at this writing. Whatever blow be might have been dealt by the war bas seemingly parsed, for the government report. Just out, gives flrures showing that domestic consump tion of cotton, which means by the makers of cotton goods, for tho month of March was the havieat on record. No month In the last two and one-half years has reached the March rec ord by H.OOO hales. Exports for the month were almost double the figures for March, 1914, while the exports for eight months sre only shout a million balos behind the previous record. Exports to (iermany, Frsnce and England have fallen off by at least one-half, but Italy a purchases have more than doubled, and sales In other markets have brought the figures well up to the normal. Imports of cotton have almost doubled in the eight months, while the price has held around the magic figure of 10 cents, set for the staple by Its rescuers last fall. The conclusion must be that the cotton trade Is In a fairly good condition, stimulated no doubt by the persistent crusade in favor of using cotton goods, a crusade much helped ' by the women of America At any rate, the solicitous attention demanded by King Cotton little while back seems no longer necessary. Auditing the Aooouats. Instead of giving us an Independent auditor with Jurisdiction over the accounts and ex penditures of city, county, school district and water district, the legislature has put on the statute books two separate laws, good perhaps ao far as they go, but which can serve only aa halfway measures. One of these bills authorises an4 directs the state auditor to check the accounts of the Water board, and while that officer may be able to vtrify the statements of the Water board periodically, he cannot In the nature of things exercise a continuous control. Nor as a matter of fact Is there any good reason why we should hare to rely on an officer .located at Lincoln, and elected by the whole state, to supervise the finances of onr water district There would be Just m much sense and logic or lack of them -to give the state auditor similar powera over the city or school board or any local govern mental subdivision. The other law referred to raekea the county clerk ex officio county comptroller, define his duties, and centers powers heretofore divided between county clerk and county board. This gives us an office of county comptroller like that we once bad and corresponding to the former office of city comptroller, but still leaves the school board finances) altogether outside, and produces duplication entirely unnecessary. The county treasurer, for example, Is treasurer ex officio for all four of these Jurisdictions, so that to aeoure a real check on the treasurer would require co-operation of state auditor, oounty clerk and city comptroller, and then stop short of the school board's accounts. In a word, we will never have a complete and thorough system of audit and control until we have the work converged Into a alngle office, rested with full authority, and equipped with a working force equal to the Importance of the duties. . fteserring- tie ''sidnej Trail." ' Men who are deeply interested in the mat ter, from a sentimental point of view at least, have outlined a plan for making the old "trail" from Bldney to the Black If Ills a part of the Lin coln Highway system. It la a worthy pnbject and deserves to be successful for several reasons. The Bldney trail waa one of the Important trade -routes in a by-gone day, and as such was notable In many ways. It shares with the Port Pierre and Cheyenne trails the legends Ct early days In the Black Hills. Much that Is roniantlcNolu. ters around these routes, and much that has no romance In It. Hardships, adventure, sudden death, the Indian raid, the road agent's swoop, ail these entered Into tne life along the Btttaey trail, and the prosaic procession of heavy-laden wagons, dragging the food and clothing for the gold hunters, closed up the picture. The stage driver, the "mul skinner," the "bull whacker," the "cow puncher." and all the characters that made up the picturesque, as well as the sord'd side of life In the development days, moved along the Sidney trail, It ahould be Improved and preserved as a worthy monument to the en deavor of men still living, who made a tidy little empire out of a bit of the forgotten mountains of the great west. War and Ooean Shipping1. Thst our democratic congress pulled down the tariff fence that had protected American In dustries sgalnst foreign competition only to have the war put It back, and build It still higher, Is a commonplace declaration, although not every oue has been able to ace Just how this result Is brought about. Perhaps, a clearer ex planation may be found In a report upon the shortage of ocean shipping facilities, which, be cause or tne war's interference, baa now raised the rout of ocean freights to the highest figures the present generation has known. Exports bound for Europe pay now from four to seven times the usual freight charge, and to to 60 per cent more for insurance, the transportstion cost of imports being correspond ingly Increased. - The best estimates figure only three-fourths of the world's available ocean tonnage as still In the carrying business, but la efficiency this three-qusrters of the shipping Is fsr below nor mal, bringing effective tonnage below half that of ordinary times. As a consequence shippers are paying approximately 1)4 a ton for general .merchandise freights on which they formerly paid IS.sO to 6 a ton. The war risk Insurance must be added, from two to five tiroes the amount previously asked, and an additional Indirect cost occurs In financing foreign trade through the derangement of exchanges, in a word, all that was taken off th tariff dutlea. and much more, Is now absorbed by Increased shipping rates, in surance and exchange. Every law enacted to govern our Water board haa expressly stated the purpose to di vorce the maaageuent and operation completely from politics, bat thla part of these las has been a dead letter. Why uot have a divorce now that will keep Water board pay-rollers eul of the poetical game for the future? Constantinople rroaa tae tafleuewSea. NAPOLFVON'B aphoriam, "Vfbo hold Cowrtantlno ple rules the world," opr e weU tha m portamw hlch haa always attached . to tho tratealo value of that city. Blnca Constantinople has been held for centurUe at a time by two ot tho weakest and moat Inefficient nations of tho world, the later Pyaantlna and later Ottoman empire. It Is evi dent that Its ownership does not naooaaajily entry with It the lordehlp of tho world. But the fact that theee two decadent powers were able by the mare poaaeeelnn of this point is exert aa Influence over world politics to wbloh their Inherent etrangth. la no wloe entitled thorn, proves Its Importance and the ntieetlnn of Its future, ownership Is one of the moat m.rmintoua and difficult of the problems tho groat wnt has to solve, the allies are rivals emon It oomee to the question of Constantinople. During the nine teenth century It waa the timed belief ex the British that the acquisition of the dty fcy a European power would put the empire In peril. Drery time that Rus sia reached out to graap the prlae Or eat Britain in terposed by arms or dlpiomavoy to protect the Turka. tn the Crimean war. BrlUeh, Pranoh, Turkish and Italian troops Joined In tho attaok upon Kneel. Now the Roaalan, Vrennn and British fleets are Joining la the effort to take Constantinople from the Turks. What will henetne of It lata nobody knew) but the diplomats, and swftvapa not they. That Russia's attw tugd has hot tMnBd is Shews by the declaration of Foreign Mlntf tMaaneff tn the Duma and the fol lowing remlttltttH. passed unanimously by the oorv grafts of represent&tlrtg of the noWllty new In session ftt rforrnll "The rltal If torn is of Hum la require full poaoea slon ot CmiRtatoUnople and both shores of the Bos porus and the ttortUnaUoa and the adjacent Islands. The Brttleh fsreigit minister, Mir Mwtn Ore. Stated te Parliament a few woeks age that Oroat Britain approved of ttaaaWa desire for a southern Pert, thsuffh ho avoided specifying Constantinople, a WbM feilehoa la vlow of the tawny dalmants. Qreeoa, asatlmlnaT to ho Lht is hart tor of the arosk. empire, aspires te lis eapttal. The Sulgara might have taken it three rears ago If tho Interposition ef the powers had hot shaoksd tbolr vletorioua edvenoe at the tthataldja line. Italy's Interests are so greatly In volved that It Is likely is enter the war. Austria's po)ly has sdways had aa Its goal the acquisition of ths Balkan peninsula. Germany had looked on Asia Mirer ss the Ipost favorable opening for Us eoloalal development and haa rradually replaced England aa the friend And "protector" of the Ottoman empire. "The war to Constantinople Use through Vienna." Is an old Russian maxim. But the Russians sow are taking a shorter out to the goal ef their long desire. Their f;et haa skirted ths western shore of the Week sua and Is now striving to enter the Bosporus. It Is an old routs to thsm. Over a thousand years ago thsy took It first, and would, aooordlng to the legend, have reached the city If It had not been for the personal Intervention of the Virgin Mary. tn those days there waa a distinction between the Rus sian and Slavic races. The Slavs wore a simple, un organised people, barbarous but not warlike, and the frequency of their appearance as captives In 'tho mar ket made their name the venerlo term for slaves. Ths Rus were of that ensraetlo race of Scandinavian orlsin .which Invaded franco under Hollo, EnSland wnder William, Italy under Robert and Russia under Rurtk. In every country becoming tne dominant ele ment In the population, which can still be" discerned In eplto of a thousand years of intermarriage, Russian history dates from tho Unas when these Vlklnsjs of Kiev, under the leadership of Askold and Dlr, set out to oonqtier Constantinople, tor, says the Byaantlne historian Phottua, tho men of Rua hitherto "unknown and of no aoconnt," became by that act "moat renowned and glorious" and "boundlessly bold and proud." Yet tbelr first attempt waa a failure, for as their fX galleys swept down the Bosporus the Bjrsentlne emperor and patriarch knelt In prayer be fore tho sacred shrine. At daybreak the patrlareh took the wonder working robe of the Virgin and marching with a procession of priests and choir boys to tho ehore, dipped It Into the Bosporus, Let Nestor, ths chronicler, toll the story In his own wf-det "Instantly the waves, which before were smooth and still, arose In anxer and began to roar, and the ships of the Idolatrous Russians were dispersed, daahed upon the shore and broken tn pieces so that few escaped the disaster or ohsnced to reach their own Isnd asraln." But .the nest Russian expedition against Con stantinople, that of SOS, avoided the perils of tho Bos porus, both natural and miraculous, for we are told that Oles put wheels on his boats and sailed overland to the city wall. This kind of vehicle, the land yacht, used to be seen upon our western plains, but bas not been used tn the present war. , The autonv bfle has taken Ita place. But another engine of war, which the Hyiantlnea, for some reason unexplained, used hi preference to the Virgin's mba for warding off the later attacks of the Ruaalans, has' been re vived by the Germans within the last fsw month This waa. In the words of the chronicler, "a kind of winged fire which leaped upon the Ruaalans and mads them lake, to the water, to ssvs themselves, but many were drowned by the weight of their helmets." The famous "Greek fire," which burned the wooden boats, was doubtless the stream of biasing petroleum with which the Germans have of lata been spraying the French trenches. Several times did the Northmen force tho Imperial City to 'pay tribute, but they never occupied It. The prophecy found Inscribed upon the foot of thahronse Statue of Bellerophon, which foretells the oonXig uf the time when the Russians should take Constantino ple still 'larks fulfilment a thousand years after, though now It loci ss If the dsy la near. . It was rather Constantinople which conquered Russia la the splrltusl eense. When the Ruaalana came to the choice of a religion they sent a commission about tn compare the various faiths. , Jhs alohemmadane re quired the abandonment of pork and wine, so they would have none of It. The delegates visited the Oarmsa Catholic churches, but reported that the service wss barren and unseautlful. But when they came to the ("huroh of gt. Pnphla "It seemed ss though we were In heaves, for In sooth on earth It Is vain to find such magnificence." So the Russians became Gretk Instead ef Latin Christians. Although they built a U Sophia of their own at Kiev they have never ceased to long for fie mother church. Their affections hsvs always been fixed upon Tsergred. the City of the Csar, upon the aunuy shores of the Bosporus, rather than upon Petregrad, the city which Peter built upon the Ice-bound eoast of ths Baltic. But first, the Russians have to force the Bos porus, which they are not likely to find easier than the British and French erf finding the Dardanelles, Though shorter, the Bosporus Is nsrrower Vnd quits ea crooked. At Ita harrowest point, wfiere only 8'0 yarda wide, stand .(lie Castle of Asia and the Castle of Rurope. which have for 3 years kept the Com merce of the Black sea at the mercy of the Turk. Tho first of these atronsholds. Anatoli H laser; waa built by Pultan Kayeald I in 1M The Rumlll Hieaar, on the opposite or western shore, was built by Moham med II In 1U ss a irellintnary to hia siege. of Con atentlnople a few months later. It was from a rock oa this promontory that Parlua wstchew the crossing of the Persian army Into Kurepe. The proud elty on the Bosporus for wnirh the powers are row struggling bas bad many masters and borne many names in Ita time. It waa Bysantlum front B C. l to A. D. 330. than Constahllnople to ltfJ. when the Isat of the Constsntlues waa killed In tbs breech through which the Ottomans entered. Hi nee then It haa been known by those who possessed It as Btambul, and it remalna for the future to decide ben, If ever, U ahall beome Taargred. rrofU-SharlneT with Kmployee. IS Dennlson Manufacturing company of Boetba goes lleary Ford one better by turning ever to Its i.ton employes all the tangible property ad common slack, the owners retaining only the preferred slock ef SS.SSS.S9a The only eontrolllug stipulation la that the preferred suh-m dividend ahall pot fall belew 4 per rent for one full year or ( per coat for two full years. Otherwise the men have complete control and ewaerahtsj if they make good. Sarw-Eaoaah Sckoellna. OMAHA, April tt.-tfo tha Editor of The Bee: X think my appraisal of com mercial high schools Ui the press waa worth while for It having brought cut Commleatoner Srnst'e and Superintend ent Graffs appraisals In 'the former's ad mirable letter to tha press of April IX It goes a long way, or all the way, to establishing public faith In present con trol of our school policy, not only ss to commercial high eobools. but ss to all our schools. I adhere to what I said though, be cause I weltere the school oommtsslonere' program called for a new commercial high school and warranted the aasump tton that thsy favored putting R on a parity with our sure-enough high school;' and I attacked, not provision in some way for our teaching stenography, typing and telegraphy (I exclude book keeping as pure wsste of teaching power, a goad general education taking hold of that promptly), but education's "bulg ing" In a protnberenoe that plainly oaa't In Itself furnish a tithe of a child' e needed mental drill, that can do ao only by wasteful overlapping. No doubt it'a well, all considered, for our schools to equip boys and girls, tbat wish them, too, tor telegraphy and stenog raphy, but to Imprison them In such drudgery In large numbers would be a mistaken kindness amounting in time to a raclsj disaster. The statement of D. E. Buck that seme parents can't afford a drill ot their chlldrena wits without an admixture of Instruction In bread -winning is, bluntly, exactly not true; for children, suffering the misfortune of being denied the aver age time for this drill, by so much of It as they lose by that much arc in greater need of It. There's nothing better estab lished than need of state protection of the child against short-stghtad. ill-eon-sldered perontaJ wishes. Moreover, this straight-Jacketing of children would tend to undermine our democracy by making a olaaa. as set aa any In Eta rope, bound down to the humdrum of machine work. There's a machine-stenographer that grinds oat dictations flawlessly, but hu. msn-stenographars, I'm told, have been known to digress from meaning and punctuation, i American school hours, I understand, are not more than two-thirds of Germany, and the German's efficiency seems not to have suffered severely from this hard drlP "Why not then teach stenography and typing to those that want them as an addition to tha regular drill T Mr. Buok (I would pass him, but can not) compels my telling my true name. I hid It because Pm unknown outside ef two little social and trading chrclea, and I feared people would say, "Who's he? Never heard of him before," that, though my latter had punoh, It would lack reach. But Mr. Buck has sowsd the suspicion that I am a curbstone professor, or his agent, U disguise. So I subscribe my name. W. E. MARTIN, 711 Omaha National Bank Building, Trwe OoMorravoyWrhe Golden Hale. TILDEN. Nob.. April U. To ths Editor of Tho Bee: When the young United States Benator Allen from Ohio was challenged by an old senatorial warhorse to define democracy, Allen responded with the following inspired words: Democracy j a sentiment not to be appalled, corrupted or compromised. It knowa no baseness; It cowera at no dan erere) It opposes ne weakness, fearless, generous and human, it rebuke the ar rogant, cberlahea honor and sympathlaes with the humble. Destructive only of despotism. It la the sole conservator of equal rights and equal obligations. The stupid, ths selfish and the bass In spirit Kay denounce It as a vulgar thins: but the hietory of our race the democratic spirit haa devoloped and illustrated the highest moral aud Intellectual attrtbuts or our nature. This Is but the exposition of the Golden Rule, the practical reflection of Good Kamarltanshlp, and the vivid truth of dtlsenshlp, home, national and world wide, that "1 am my brother's keeper." Thla abridged epto should become the In dividual statute of every clttsen. for it thla radiating stream would be permitted to flow outward from every Individual, the horrors of misrule from the family through municipality, state, nation and world, would be abated. "Majority rule" Is but a makeshift, and s only another form of "Might makes right," tor the .might and the majority may be on the side of Justice, or it may be In favor ef nullifying this tenet. Stymologlcally, democracy la 'The voice of the people," and the Latin proverb smith said: "Vox popull, vox Del" (The voice of the people Is ths voice of Clod). Ood's voice tould not be wrong, therefore the voice of the people la only ths voles of Ood whan right. This definition really applied would solve the complex question ef today, civksally. politically, aa well as matters of world-wide import. C. P. I buHeb Berl-Berl. OMAHA, April Is. -To the Kditor of Tha Bee: Bert-beri aeeme lue scurvy to be a disease, not to much dependent oa what we eat, as n what we don't est. Like scurvy It has been known for ages, but mora aa a dlaeaae of the Orient China, Japan, ete. It may not be Infectious, as the Associated Press saye of the ninety odd cases ou tha Kron Prlns Wlltvelm, but recent medical writ ers are not agreed aa te that, for there are two distinct views: One that it la Infectious and the other tbat It la s disorder of metabollamor nutrition. In tho days of the old aailing vessels. when ahlpa were out fo- montha In J coming to A marina, than It was that the disease aourvy was known as tha "calam ity of sailors." We are told that it was I he lemon twhioh waa about the only thing in the way of fruit or vegetable that could be conveniently taken in these long voyages), that drcve scurvy from tha seas. Bert-be rl is thought to be due to eat ing polished rice, almost exclusively or rice where the "sVIa ' or pericarp Is re nioved. This is a goad deal like trying ts live on the pure stare ef bolted flour with, out the gluten or nitrogen ef the whole wheat flour. While suoh an imperfect dietary may be a great factor by the lack of yes-stables or fruit, there sre plenty ot Asiatics thst do the asms and never have the disease. A man that Uvea on salted meat all winter U ths farmer. In ths spring says he needs a blood medicine, tie mesne ale blood craves things that are green freah vegetables. Bert-beri is thought by many suthors to be due to Infection end to be sn in fectlous disease, but In this rasa not due to ths body. Also like typhus snd s urvy It la due to overcrowding and poor ventilation. The fact Is there 's mighty little yet known definitely about the causes of beri beri and even scurvy Is In the balance as to whether it be Infectious. No rerm found for either ss yet. If this war continues there will need he a crusade and house cleaning against hugs that carry germs to this country snd the sorubblug brush of the Hollander will be neceasary bare on house and pave ment. It seems a sharue that the United Ft ate should not only hsve to be the seylum for the natlona, but the bath tub of all creation as well. The question la, can ws soap and scrub snd disinfect tha mall and not become Infected oureelve snd start aflame epi demic here? Here are torn of the Infectious diseases that war can bring to us. Typhus, ty phoid, berl-eri. cholera. Smallpox, yel low fever, bubonic plague, the flea and some from the orient that the reader never heard of. OBOROB P. WILKINSON1, M. D. Sine; Them Down. OMAHA, April 16.-TO the Editor of The Bee: At our free gospel meetings each one ahould endeavor by prayer and song service to cheer every soul; and our leader (Lord bless her, she's hsndeome and eleven, should keep the program under perfect control. When Plater O'Dobblna, pals, nervous and worried, stsnds up to repeat a long massage ot woe and te tell where her grandmother's mother lies burled and how the dear soul bore her grief here below; and while this dear sister Is mentally gating with sad, soulful eyes on that faraway mound, lot tho saints raise a hymn of devotion and praising, and to ward off the blues, sing the good lady down. There's Tom Swikelhanuner, a chronlo backslider; he's always on hand with a snout full of gin i he left wife and chil dren without a provider, and his heart is ss tough as an elephant's skin; when he bogins bawling and pounding the al tar, and praying tor sinners In language profound, O, start the grand chorus, let no pilgrim falter, keep time with the or gan, and all sing him down. When we get a ewell pastor, who lec tures on erlenoe; explains evolution and preachee In Greek: and denies that young David fought bears and slsw giants, or that God mads this beautiful world In a week; I any, that whenever we fao such a crisis, and the doctor stops forth In his skullcap and gown, our lungs will expand and we'll raise our rich voices, and alng the old doubting philosopher down. And every church haa thom-theaa long wlndod creatures these waterlogged ships on the ocean of Joy. a hindrance to sinners, and pastors, and teachers, they get on our nerves and our patlsnoe de stroy; and when other methods have proved unavailing (feet shuffling, loud coughing, side glances and frtremsi there is still one rebuks that Is swift and un failing, sing thsm down, 'tis the surest relief, sing them down. E. O. M-tNTOHII. CHEIRY CHAFF. "That landlord Is certainly an enter prising feller" "How now?" "He has Installed outside roller towels that run the full length of a three-storv hotel. Guests on every floor can lean out of the windows snd wipe their hanrta." "But why havs ths towels outsider' "Oh. that's so the rain can waah m." Louisville Courier-Journal. KABIBBLf KABARET 4 EifrbVrT:KtS STBeXfC rootlttJSES. IDE AA Uft IfvMrTTI VO lu. KEif rrurrwfbuv "Pa, doesn't preclpllstlon mean th seme as settling T" "It does In chemistry, my son; but In business you'll find thst many persons In settling don't show sny precipitation at all." Beaton Transcript. "80 she has broken the engagement! Did she give you back the diamond ring?" "No, we are deadlocked. She eaye she will give me back the price I paid for It, but diamonds have doubled in value and that she le entitled to the profit." I'hlladelphla Ledger. LINCOLN. . Witter Bynner in Harper's Weekly. Lincoln? Weil, 1 was In the old Second Maine, The first regiment In Washington from the Pine Tree St ete. Of course, I didn't fret the butt of the - clip; We was there for guarding Washington We waa all green. I ain't never been to but one theater in my life I didn't know how to behave; I ain't never been since. I can see ss plain aa my hat the box where he sat In When he was shot. There was quits a panic When we found our president was In the shape he was In: Never saw a aoldier In the world but what liked htm. Tea. sir. His looks wss kind o'hard to forget. He was a spars man. An old farmer. Everything wan all right, you know. But he wan't a smootn-acpearln' man at ail Not In no ways; Thin-faced, long-necked And a swrilln' lnd of a thick lip llke A neighbor In' farmer. And he was a Jolly old fellow always cheerful; He wan't so high but what the boys could talk to him their own ways. While I was eervln' at the hospital He'd 00 mo In and say, "You look nice in here," Praise us up, you know. And he'd bend over and talk to tho beys And he'd talk so good to 'am ao cloan- That's why I call him a farmer. I don't mean that everything about him wasn't all right, you understand. It'e Jos' well, I was a farmer And be waa Jes' everybody's netghboiv 1 guess even you young folks would g liked him. u ROYAL BAKING POWDER liHi-W iMiu) S tt',w . ..iVT w,T-"1 f V J - f : Vo v,vwA v J' '. w 1 v N fV 1 !f , JViM "1 A v 'v, (J I xv. x-r - w- " v - v.X'i" ' WW m What do your cigars mean to you? J Are they simply "something to smoke or are they chosen so as to bring the greatest delight to the good hours you put in with them? J For example: The hour to enjoy a rich, heavy, all-Havana is right after dinner. But for your afternoon and evening smoke you'll get infinite enjoyment out of a much milder type of ,dgar like Tom Moore, the "mod ulated Havana. Smoke one or two this evening for a try out. " They always come back for Moore 99 Tom. Moore CIGAR lO Little Tom 5$ LittU Teas St saWl iuf pom caa'f snWg Asav Beet ft BnaaaB Cigar Ca, Sis So. lth gv. Omaha, Ptstrtbutse. z 7 san&SJ i V.