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Manicure
Lady
Birds of a Feather
The Splendid and
Talkative Parrot
1
By Nell Brinklcy
Copyright. 114, Intern! News Service.
By WILLIAM F. KIRK.
"There was a very learned old gent up
to the house last night visiting with
father, and It wag sure a treat to hear
him talk of his travels. I guess he has
been almost everywhere In the world that
It Is safe to go. and he remembers about
everything which he has ever saw," said
the Manicure Lady.
"This old gent clalma that the human
lace la about ready to give whisky the
Bate. He says he bases his remarks on
what he haa aaw and on the Ideas of a
lot of wise old Ikes that have spoke with
him. He says whisky Is going to go, that
the demon rum Is due for a awful kick
In the shins." i
"I guess he is right," said the Head
t-arbcr. "I ain't no temperance preacher,
but I feel It in my bones that the sale
of whisky Is coming to a end before long.
And I am glad of it."
"I thought you liked your little nip,"
said the Manicure Lady.
"I used to go to It a little," admitted
the Head Barber, "but the last year or
so I have let It alone. I never was no
steady drinker' of it anyway. I could
take a drink or two when I thought I
wanted It, or I got along without it for a
week or two and never thought nothing
of It. But since I quit it altogether I
feel that much better."
"Father didn't warm up none to the
prospect," said the Manicure Lady. "He
knew in his heart that his old pal was
telling the truth, but I guess that the
outlook Is kind of bleak and barren to
father. Poor old gent, he Is living mostly
in the past these days. He was brought
up and lived all the years of his life
among men who liked their toddy. Some
of them went to It harder than others,
-but they all nibbled, and I guess that
for the- last forty years father has never
wont a week without his morning's
morning. He Is one man In a million at
it, I guess, because he never neglected
his family none that I know of, and he
was always as kind as a kitten to all of
us, though at times a little more so.
"It would be pretty hard on an old boy
like that not to have a nip when he
thought he needed it," said the Head
Barber.
"Yes," said the Manicure Ij&dy, "but
father looks at it philosophical. He says
that he ain't far to go anyhow, and If he
has to live his last few years as dry
as a fish in the bottom of a boat, he
won't complain none, thinking of all the
good it will do the younger men to have
whisky where they can't get tempted by
it. The old gent is a good old sport, and
If the country goes dry before his time
he will grin and bear It, though I hare
a hunch that he will kind of welcome the
grim reaper."
"It wasn't so many years ago that a
man could get a drink of good liquor,"
said the Head Barber, "but the stuff
that they are filling bottles with -now
and putting whisky labels on ain't fit to
give to a mad dog. It's plain poison. I
don't believe there la any such thing aa
pure whisky' left, and when you think
that pure whisky was bad enough, you
can get some Idea of the damage this
new stuff Is doing."
"The old gentleman at our house last
night says that the only thing for this
country to do Is to switch off onto beer
instead of booze," said the Manicure
Lady.
"Maybe," said the head Barber, "and I
guess it w luldn't hurt a fellow none to
switch from that to mineral water."
' J Advi
l' a- 1
Advice to Lovelorn
"You people," complained a "young thing" I know, with soft, woodsey
brown hair and eyes like leaf gold, and she pried In her big ringed hairpin
tighter and patted the roll that ran lengthwise of her head from forehead
to crown like the old-fashioned sausage ringlet they used to brush "up on
babies' heads "you people," she went on wisely, "who make pictures and
things, who make us prettier than we are and homelier than we ever could
ever dread to be, who understand us, and make fun of us, and know even
the color of the lining of our souls, and every bit of glass that goes to
make up the fragile kaleidescope of our hearts, sometimes you stub your
toeB and make blunders same as other people!"
I petted my own crown and smoothed my two eyebrows with a moist
finger (which proves I am not a man). "My lovely friend, since you rid
your busy little, mind of that long and tangled sentence, now tell me what's
It all about." "Why," quoth she, enthusiastically, "you always make
women parrots when you picture that bird human at all. And let me tell
you there are gentlemen there are elegant and splendidly-colored chaps
who are dead Images of parrots save that I like the parrot best!
"The dictionary says that a parrot 'Is a gorgeous bird sometimes
ery green with gay colors about him; nothing in his mind so far aa we
know; with a marvelous power of repeating things that other people say!'
Oh, a wondrously clever and brilliant bird! With his tongue busy on
mimicry. There's the chap; haven't you ever been bored by him? And
he swings In the golden ring of his own complete vanity and never sees the
absent-minded girl, and the one with a delicate yawn behind her whit
hand-back, the gloomy one drowned In despair of his ever going away for
ever, and the outraged one who looks him' In the face and wanders in her3
sour with men who draw out the silken thread of their own minds la their
speech, and doesn't hear a thing Of what he says but the last word!
"Oh, parrot man whea you die the angel at the gate will put hla
hand on your chest and shake his bead: 'Not here, until,' be will say, 'you
explain the long rows of fallen maidens behind you, lining the paths where)
you have lingered, maidens bored to death, their pitiful high heels and lit
tie toes turned up to the sky! I have let the parrot In for he is likable
and has long fits of silence but you!' , '
"And then I will sit up In my grave of boredom and laugh and laugh,
and shake my hands, as,d Jiggle my feet with delight! Make a picture ot
a parrot man!" So look upon It. But there are women '....!
NELL BRINKLEY.
ay mntei taxmtxx
Talk to Mlm vrltb. Dlgalty.
Dear MlsS Fairfax: I am a young lady
of 22, and am employed as a bookkeeper
in a large house. 1 have been employed
there for the last six years and my em
ployer haa always spoken in a business
way. Lately, however, when spending to
me he embraces me, and when I tell him
not to do It he Just laughs. When some
body happens to come in the office he
puts on a serious face as If he never did
anything. This has happened -a great
number ot times and I do not know what
to do. Being so long there and getting
a fair salary, I do not like the Idea of
losing my position, as 1 have to support
a mother and six children. M. H.
When a Girl's in Love
Tell your employer with quiet dignity earth, She couldn't
that your self-respect will not permit deceive
By DOROTHY DI.V
An anxious youth asks me how a man
can tell whether a girl Is really In love
with him, or la just flirting.
Why, bless you, son, It is as easy as
falling off a log.
A woman In love is
the most give-away
, proposition o n
Quickest, Surest Cough
Remedy Is Home'
Made
Easily rresared la a Few M la
st es. Che but I'aeoualea
vfY
blind
you to allow hla embraces. Add, too, ; baby If he didn't
that you are the sole support of a mother j want to be de
and six children and ask him If he wants i eeived. The signs
it on his conscience to have you go out ' and symptoms of
and search prdbably vainly for a posl- the tender passion
tlon these times when offices are dls- ' break out on her
missing employes rather than taking on j like the measles,
new ones, and are so ap-
' parent and unmis
, . takable that It
doesn't take a
diagnostician t o
recognise them at
sight.
He who runs may
' read, but-nd stick 4
I a pin In this point, , son In judging
: whether a girl is In love with you or not
1 go by the way she acts, and not by what
. she says. Words are cheap. Especially
with the female sex. Put no faith in
them. At lovers" perjuries, they say, Jove
Rome neonle are constantly annnved l.n.ki it must have conniption fits of
from one vear's end to the other with a mirth over wemen's vows of devotion,
persistent bronchial courI., which is whol- Th ft coated llei that
lv unnecessary. Here is a home-made .mii
remedy that gets right at the cause and me" vnlty ,ead" them t0 wllow
v. ill make you wonder what became of it. : whole.
liet Zty ounces I'inex (50 cents worth) Therefore, pay no attention to girl's
from any druggist, pour into a pint bottle honeyed talk. It'a the bait the little
and fill th lt.hi'!'n F1!"!,1 I spider ha. set to lure flies Into her par-
Gradually but surelv vou will notice the
phlegm thin out and then disappear al
together, thus ending a cough that you
never thought would end. it aiso loosens
lor. but keep a wary eye out to see what
she does when you're about.
Do not be misled by the warmth of
a girl's welcome when you go to see her,
th drv, hoarse or tigm cougn anu ":or the fact that she calls you up on the
remarkable rapidity. Ordinary coughs , t hon"' ni inv ou a,oun1 lf fou
are conquered by it in 24 hours or less. ! fall to show up with your usual regulsr
Nothing better for bronchitis, winter j Ity. This Is simply business. Custom
cough and bronchial asthma. . does not permit a girl to go out and pick
Diis 1'inex and himar yrup mixture . 6ut tbe on, man , tbe wori,, $he ke,
makes a full pint enough to last a hu.K.B(.
family a Ion time at a cost of only 64 . to husband.
cents. Keeps perfectly and tastes pleas-! Her chance is to gather all the
ant. Easily prepared, full directions men she can about her In the hopes that
with Pinex. among the bunch there will be the one
Pinex is a special and highly eoncen- partjcular he. Also to be a belle, to be
trated compound of genuine Norway pine ,dmlre(jt ,iVes a girl the reputation of
VS'lll m her Mt.e world. Hence she
promptness in overcoming bad coughs, P'ays up her smile of joyous greeting to
chest and throat colds. every man who comes along. It'a Just
Ot the genuine. Ask Vour druggist on6 0f the moves In the game and has
for "2 ounces Pinex," and do riot accept n0 ,rton significsme. though maay
anything else. A guarantee of hsolute
satisfact on. or monev promptly refunded, men never una mis oui.
J". with this preparation. The Pinex .The first unmistakable sign that a girl
Co., Pt- Wayne, lnd. . j Kes of being in love with you, son, is
when she begins to prefer the back par
lor to the theater or a dance. As long
as a girl wants you to be forever trot
ting her around to some, place of amuse
ment, she regards you merely as a pleas
ant means to an agreeable end. You are
her opera and supper ticket, so to speak.
She may find you entertaining, agree
able, oongenlul, but she Isn't In love with
you. When she does fall In love for
keeps 'She begins to prefer the lamp
turned low In her own home to the foot
lights, and her Idea of a perfectly thrill
ing and exulting evening la one spent
alone win you. So when Mabel begins
to show symptoms of slaying-at-home-ltls
you may rest assured that you have made
a very considerable dent In her little
heart.
The next way to test a maiden's real
affection for you Is to try her on a mono
logue about your early youth. This Is,
indeed, an acid test ot undying affection,
but it Is one whose virtue can be relied
upon. No other human being except a
man's mother and his wife will ever stand
for the reminiscences of when he was a
freckled faced little boy and hid the cat
under the bed.
Therefore if Maud does not yawn In
your face when you spiel along about
your youthful advfnures, and If she eats
up the stories of your schoolboy days,
you may pop the question with the cer
tainty that she Is yours for the asking.
Next, observe a girl's demeunor to you
when you take her nut If you would
ascertain whether she Is in love with you
or merely stringing you along until the
right msn appears on the scene. If she
Is always urging you to spend money. If
she Is constantly handing out hints about
flowers and candy, and if, when you
take her to a restaurant, she orders the
most expensive dishes on the bill of fare,
there's nothing doing so far as you are
concerned. Phe's grafting what she can
get In the present because she does not
expect to be Interest! In your future.
On the other hand, K a girl Is In love
with you she's always wanting you to
save. She'll suggest the movies as a
substitute for the theater, and thinks ice
cream plenty good refreshment on a
festive occasion. She has mercy on your
pocketbook, because she is hoping that
some dsf It will be her own, end that
the more economical you are In the pres
ent, the sooner you lll he nble to marry.
Take heed also to a maiden's conver
sation on domestic topics. As long as
Bally scoffs at the kitchen an I scorns
the sewing machine, and mils babies
brats, she isn't in love with you, or any
other man. But tbe minute a gul fails
name
Ring-
In love she Is converted to domesticity,
and she begins to take an Interest In
housekeeping and to try to team how to
sew. You'll find no'better test of a
maiden's sentiments toward you than to
take her up a good cook book instead of
the latest novel the next time you go to
see her.
If she dlstainfully casts it aside, It's a
Up to you to hold your tongue; but if
she Immediately become absorbed In
reading the recipes, go ahead without
fear and tell her about that little flat
with exposed plumbing and a papier
mache wainscoted dining room that
you've been looking at, and that would
make the cosiest sort of a neet for two.
And here's also another sign that never
falls. Observe If the girl Is worried about day of the fire she
your health. It doesn't make any differ-, was carrying an
Little Reddy Ringlets
By ELBERT HUBBARD.
Her name Is Heddy Ringlets.
At least she said so, and no one so far
has aver been found to say otherwise.
When asked her name she answered:
"Why, don't you
know? My
is Reddy
lets,"
Hhe must have
been i years old.
Che was only half
dressed, the wore
stockings and one
shoe.
When they found
her there in Golden
(late park the third
ence whether you are husky of an ox
and never had an. ache or pain In your
life. Every woman who loves a man be-
Ueves him to be a frail infant. Incapable i looking
of taking care of himself, and who can
only be kept alive by her tenJer solici
tude. And she Is firmly convinced that
he is liable to be run over by a street
car or lost In a crowd unless ahe worries
over him.
So, take heed as to whether Gladys
Geraldlne Insist on your wearing rub
bers and muffling up your throat and
keeping out of a draught and giving up
Smoking. If she lets you go out into the
rain without an umbrella, and doesn't
make you telegraph if you arrive safely
as soon as you get to Philadelphia, she's
not in love with you. Uut lf she tele
phones to know If jpou got home without
being kidnap l-then. son, begin pricing
wedding rings,for she's mads up her
mind to take care of you through' life,
and the first thing yeu know you will be
giving her a legal right te do it.
By these signs and tokens may the
temperament of a maiden's affection be
accurately gauged.
old wax doll with
a broken nose. Hie
walked around,
and look-
Household Hints
When making apricot Jam add a little
lemon Juice. It gives an excellent flavor.
When whipping cream beat slowly for
the first two minutes and then very
rapidly.
If bacon Is soaked In water for a few
minutes before frying it will prevent the
fst from running.
Save the vinegar left over from pickles.
It Is better than ordinary vlnear for
salad dressing.
iR1
-' V
Ing, and looking.
A soldier asked her:
"Who are you try
ing to find, little girl?''
"I'm looking for my Daddy and my
Precious. And this is my Dolly Dimple.
She's awful hungry. Have you seen my
Daddy and my Precious?"
And the soldier, busy with other thinsn,
hadn't seen them, r
When asked l.er duddy's other name
she answered: "Just Daddy." Thn she
said: "My Precious calls his Grosser
Keddy."
Hhe spoke as plainly as a full grown
woman. Where hir parents were, or
where Ihey had lived, or how she hss
gotten to Golden Gate park no one knew.
In the park were many tents. Bedding,
furniture, horses, wagons strewed the
ground. Soldiers here and there were on
guard. Many of the women wore men's
clothing eults of overalls and Jumpers.
Some laughed and sang: others wept and
refused to be consoled. There were moth
ers looking for their children and children
looking for their mothers. And over to
the east, over what three days before had
been a glorious city, now hung a black,
angry pell of smoke. It was a scene ot
dire confusion. The sick, the dying, the
laughing, romping folks, who regarded It
all as a big picnic, mingled in a common
camaraderie. .
And through it all wandered little
Reddy Klngles, tearless and unafraid,
looking for her daddy and her precious.
A group of people ut a bonfire were
eating. Little Reddy Ringlets ap
proached. "Dolly Dimple is awful hun
gry," she said.
"Blesa hor dear heart," said a kind
woman. "You mean you are hungry."
And so the little girl was warmed and
fed.
A curious and strange old woman stood
by ths bonfire and watched little Reddy
Ringlets as she ate and now and then
offered her doll some of the crackers and
cheese.
"That's my grandchild," cried the old
woman, with a chuckle. "I'll take her
to her mother. Come with granny, little
one, and we'll find your ma."
The old woman had a sharp chjn and
a sharp nose. Hhe had no teeth and her
voles was high and cracked. Confid
ingly the little girl allowed herself to be
led away.
"That isn't her child or any kin ot
here," said the woman who was doing
the cooking.
"Never mind," said her husband as he
drank coffee out of a tin cup; "never
mind. What' difference Is It? Haven't
we a few troubles of our own?"
The great . fire ' was in April. The'
months went by as the months do.
it was Christmas morning.
Down beyond Chinatown stood a rickety
old tenement, one of the kind that fire
and death had scorned to touch.
The Italian who kept the frut stand on
the corner was talking to the policeman
on the beat.
"You had better so and see about It
she's a lovely little girl. No one knows
where that crazy old rugplckar got her.
Thu old woman went out at daylight,
with her bag on her back, and she's
locked the child In. It's tbe gable room,
back, next to the roof. I'll go with yeu."
They climbed the shaky stairs, up and
up and up.
They reached the top floor. Tne hall
S dark. They felt for the door-latch.
The door war locked- The policemen
threw his shoulder against It and it gave
way.
Thoy entered. The room was almost bare
ot furniture, eold. dirty, unkempt. To the
left was a little bedroom about as big
as a dry goods box. The policeman was
about to enter, when he heard a child's
voice. He paused and pered In. He saw
sn empty stocking pinned to the wall at
the toot of th bed- ' j
Kneeling at the bedalCe in an attitude
ot prayer waai a little girl. The morning
sun sent a luminous ray ot light on her
head, golden with ringlets. The police
man, big and brave. Just stood there,
ite listened, and these were the words
he heard:
"Ob, God! Yeu forgot an and Dully
Dimple this time, and there ain't no
Santa Claua, for my stocking Is empty.
And ,1 am cold and hungry. Hurry up.
pUase, Mister God, and .find my daddy
and my precious; nd I'll be a good girl
and never cry any more, even when th
old woman whips me!"
And aa he listened the' tears began to
rua down the big policeman's no.
II wrapped little Reddy Ringlet In aa
old blanket and carried ber gently down
the stairs, and all the time she held,
fast to a very dirty war. doll,
The old Italian dowa vn th street gav '
the little girl an orange, and at th eta
tlon house th matron give her a bag ot
candy.
Little Reddy Ringlets never fount her
daddy, nor her precious. Were they
caught in the fire, crushed by failing
walls? No one can say. But bow little
Reddy Hinglc-ts h a horn with a,
rancher and his good wife eut beyond
the hills of Ssusallto. And when Christ
sas cornea and she hangs up ber stock
ing It is never empty.
End Indigestion
Or Stomach Pain
In Five Minutes
Tim It! la five minute all stomach)
distress will go. No Indigestion, heart
burn, sourness or belching of gas, acid,
or eruption ot undigested food, no dlssU
ness, bloating, foul breath or headache.
Pape's Diapepsln la noted for Us spe4
In regulating upset stomachs. It Is the
surest, quickest and moat certain IndU
gestloni remedy In th whol world, and
besides It 1 harmless. j
Millions of men and women fow (
their favorite foods without fear t.hf
know Pape's Diapepsln will save Ueni
from any atomaeh misery.
Please, for your sake, get a large fifty
cent cas of Papa's Dlapepain from any:
drug ston and put your stomach right.
Don't keep on being miserable llf la tool
short you are aot ber long, so snake
your stay agreeable. Bat what you like
and digest it; enjoy it, without dread oil
rebellion In th stomach.
Tape's Diapepsln belongs la your horn
anyway. Should one of th family est
something which don't eg re with thew
or in ease of an attack of tadtgestion
dyspepsia, gastritis or stomach derange
mnt at daytime or during ftv night. If
la handy to gW th quickest, surcat r4 ,
lief known. Advrtisejeat j
;t
c
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