r k
Tin: i;i:k: omaiia. TiintsiUY. jantaky
ion.
m The (ee-g ftme Magazine f)a
V
Undoing of Mr. Uplift "The AJt:' Ared
HY '.AFAVKTTK PARKS
J
Here s an ii onnt of bridegroom los- ,
Ing Ills vole by hsngtng a picture." com
ments Mr. Ipllft In the srtistlc side of
doim-MIc life.
'Now. If It had only been the bride, ahe
wouldn't be able to sav aft-' the first
lnt, 'I'm going home to mamma.' " re
marks Hon. who Ik gifted with a hopful
Imagination.
"This la the first tlms I ever heard of
au' h a peculiar occurrence." roumM
Father.
"I thought hubby always found hla voice
when wlfle sprung the picture hanging
at nnt." la Hons belief. "Maybe this guy
only run nut of breath before be got the
ihromo adjusted to suit the bride. Some
times a chap will run out of the right
kind of aillertlvea tf tha case happen to
f- - specially artintlc"
"There are several methods of hanging
p. turee." explains Father, "some of which
are more arduous than othera."
Leave It to the dames to have their
hubbies try them all." volunteers Son.
"These aklrta that are Just craxy to have
their flats look artistic drive their hus
bands crazy In their mad scramble to be
different. More family rows have hap
pened over hanging 43-cent chromos than
over all the rest of the chores In the flat."
"I don't understand, however, why this
kind of work should paralyie a person's
vocal cords." puzsles Father.
"From- what I know about married men."
asserts Son, "they wouldn't stop at the.
vocal cords, hut would get paralysed al
together If they failed to rise to the ar
tistic level of the missus."
"Pictures; must be hung Just right to get
the best results." emphasises Father.
"That's what ail the skirts tell u
3 in vi 4
CVrYrH.'SBoVt),
IVILl.'Nni TO
LISTEN Tt
controlling I he vocal cords," surmises
Father, with the air of a man who ha
made an Important scientific discovery.
"A bump on the bean has been known
to do that." agrees Son, "but when the
btimpee wakes up he usually makes up
for lost time."
"Do you contend, then, that such con
tact might tend to loosen the organs of
speech?" queries Father.
"The last time we had a picture-hanging
feat In our happy little flat." answers
Hon. "It loosened the plaster first, but the
language got awav a close second, and.
believe me. It was some language."
l "Perhaps you are correct." admits I
I Father, "my memory aceins a trifle hasy
i about the Incident."
coarse men." admits Son, "hut that Is no "Iohh of memory Is another symptom
reason why they should wait until they thnt fiows the picture hanging stunt."
s;et hubby on the top rung of the step- i B.tyg Hon "Hubby always tries to work
ladder to explain the right way to do the Umt pBK ,,lt yoll ,, D,t your (k
work. If they know ail aooui me hii ui BKainst a peanut that the bride can never
hanging art. why do they pass the buck
to the fnnillj bread winner?" demands the
family lniulsltor.
"Kvrry liuuband ought to be willing; to
listen to suggestions as to the most suit
able location for the picture," argues
l'n t her.
When a guy Is balancing himself on a
kety ludder by pushing his nign ana
sslc brow Into the frescoed celling, at
e SUI11R lime JUKKIIUK in..,.
iii m i . . k.i m ha mmar
n a Kliuea irinia in ouc iioh", .....
In the other and a paper of tacka In his
mouth, he'd rather rut out the converea
tlon." declarea Bon. "except a few choice
words of his own make reserved for such
pedal occasions."
"Perhaps this poor man that lost his
voice struck his head against the celling,
temporarily rendering useless the nerve
forget the cruel words."
"Decorating the home belongs In woman's
sphere," says Father.
"F.very married man hands that con to
his better half, but few get away with It."
warns Son. "After one trial on the step
ladder most hubbies would rather drive
the nails In wlfle's face than In the wall
to hang pictures on. It certainly Is no
Job for a minister's son."
"1 see no reason for a man to get ex
cited or lose his voice over such a trivial
matter," protests Father.
"As for me," concludes Son. "If f had
to wear out my bird-like voice hanging
works of art around the flat I'd save It
for the stovepipe stunt. As the prlr.e trick
to get hubby's voice and goat, believe
me, that's the real cheeae."
(Copyright, 1911. hy the N. T. Herald Co.)
Polly Hitchin Her Book
1 suppose there are folks as don't mind
when It's a' wet day Saturday, but then It
don't meo them being hungry. It makes
a deal of difference to us and Mr. Smith;
he sells vegetables In the High street, and
we works In wtth' him on Saturday. - tt
ain't a bit of good trying to sell no other
day, and the way you works It Is to bor
row 1(1 schillings on Thursday, and then
you buys the stuff that night. This time
of year It's celery, so all Friday 'they are
washing It In the back yard, and If ther
ain't a back yard they washes It In the
i-cet. and It don't make arf a smell and
mess. The. gentleman na to nave nn
money paid back on Sunday with 1 pence
extry on every shilling. The week afore
last they cleared 15 shilling, but this week
there was only 3'i pense left after paying
back, and as Mr. Smith haa nine of his
own to keep we didn't get nothing, so a
wet Saturday means a lot more than some
folks think. . It's made us very short this
week, so Mother has had to put In any
bits of extry clothes we had, and this
made the Terror's mistake matter all the
more. Me and Albert Smith was going to
; '? Vil Wim V v- ) v
M f S, BUT I S7 THIS is
w SF! tsjgyScV rM vjKMn 95000,000
js. '
mm
The Bcc'5 Junior 111 H Inlay DooK
his is the Da
SwfeWe Celebrate
M-rVA
THURSDAY,
January 19, 1911.
IkC V v.J I
few
S IhmiI. ear.
High 1S93
Ketlom 1!00
190$
- 1904
.1S96
Name anil Address.
Ruth Byrne, 2107 Burdette St
Helen Baldwin, 2T.12 Leavenworth St
Albert Illy, 3120 South Seventh St Bancroft
Esther Bradtsh, 1801 Blnnejr St I.othrop
Krnest Bahnke, 2941 Spring; St Windsor
Laura J. Clark, 2813 Woolworth Ave Park 1904
Jennie Chrlstansen, 2406 South Thlrty-nrat St Windsor 1S97
Jacob Davidson, 1823 Norlh Twenty-third St long .1902
Ranson Fowler. 403 South Twenty-fifth Ave High ..1893
Gladus Goodman. 5003 Cass St High 1894
Frederick M. Wain. 1323 South Twenty-eighth St.... Park 1904
Helen Halsey. 3720 North Twenty-fourth St !throp ... . . . ... . 1 903
Gertrude Hansen, 2821 Cass St Webster . .M 1898
I-ouise M. Hahn, 2121 Douglas St Central 189H
Roy F. Horsens, 2916 Seward St '. . .Long , 1897
Lizzie Hook, 3330 South Nineteenth St Vinton ,,.1900
Ward Hameri, 2722 North Twenty-eighth Ave High ,.,..-.1895
Myrtle Jones, 2313 Mason St Mason 1902
Thuyra V. M. Jenson, 1824 Bancroft St Castellar ........1899
Roy McFarlane, 1138 South Thirtieth Ave Park . - 1900
Gerald McCreary, 2416 Manderson St
Henry T. Murray. 1115 North Thirty-eighth St.
Kdward Nussrallak, 1122 South Thirteenth St..
Margaret Norris, 2306 South Tenth St
Ethel Kurz, 364 8, Lafayette Ave ,
Roy Kelly. 2427 Eraklne St
Anna S. Kaiman, 1714 South Tenth St , ..
fiNALS of Amelica1
4H
(Not Yk HU
JJUfTOUTCIRL
BY M.E
.Sacred Heart.- ... . 1897
.Franklin 1902
.Pacific 1902
.St. Patrick .1903
. High 1894
.Lake ..1901
. Llncolu ......... 1901
Esther Lewis, 1410 North Twenty-fifth St Long 1898
Helen Lyons, 1318 Jackson St Leavenworth 1900
David Jensen, 2021 Lincoln Ave Castellar t902
George Ralph Ruthin, 4348 Franklin St High ... ... ... ...... 1894
Virginia Radcliff. 1312 South Eleventh St Pacifio . . 1905
Jerome B. C. Russell, 2207 North Twentieth St Lake 1S96
Floyd Ramsey, 1511 North Nineteenth St Kellom 1903
Zdenka A. Sedlacek. 1453 South Eleventh St Lincoln 1903
Fritz Stegemann, 1907 CastellaN St Castellar .1898
John Silk, 1807 North Seventeenth St Holy Family 1898
David Tobln, 1123 Harney St Pacific 1899
Clifford Vinson, 2715 South Fourteenth St Bancroft .1902
Harry Wooldridge, 3227 California St Webster 1S97
Anna Walter, 2934 Arbor St Dupont ... ., 1904
Lillian E. Westerlln, 2320 South Thirty'-flfth St. ... Windsor ...189S
Sarah Warshawsky, 1903 Cuming St Cass ... ., 1905
Bertha Zimmerman, 3621 Brown St High 1S93
have a competition who could ride down
to East Ham first without paying for; It
We hadn't had much luck with 'buses.
though If you're nippy and the top
of the motor la full, you pan ride no end
of a way whllKt the gentleman la collecting
Upstairs: The Terror must needs come and
and try too; but hla legs are too short for
'buses, so he wasn't 'art pleased to see a
cart going along with a nice low down
rail.. He was Hitting on It as pleased as
funch, when all of a sudden It went round
a, corner, and It turned out as It was the
Wuterlng cart. Poor Chris had to be In
bed nearly all neit day, not having a
change; but I won the competition by rid
ing on the back of a funeral; It went, a
good steady pace, and you felt more set
tled like than on a 'bus. That's Just the
kort of thing as always happens to Chris.
The. other day he must needs go climbing
up one of thctn sand-bins In the road and
tumble In head first; It happened to be a
small one and nearly empty, so his head
Knt burled right deep down, and he was
nearly dead of sand by. the time a kind
gentleman pulled him out by the legs.
Marjory Hardcaslle' In Cprnhlll Magazine.
A man has asked me to marry him. It's and looks. She really much more than
called proposing, and 1 thought It would looked at me. She said, "What does this
be perfectly wonderful, but It- was an mean?'
awful hlow to find that Instead of being
thrilled I was feeling very nervous for fear
one of my skirts was going to mutiny.
I knew that a hook had given way and
were walking through the park to get
a 'bu.
Just at the moment when I should have
fallen In hla arma with a cry of rapture
I had a great feeling that' a great many
hooks and eyes had lost themselves and
that It was no longer any use to go shuf
fling along pretending that I was obliged to
hold up my skirt that was made very short
and didn't have enough of It to hold up,
anyway, so 1 suddenly sat down.
It was the only thing to do. As It was,
some green satin had appeared with hor-
I
f
Knew the Judge
J
c
t
1
V
I
Judge Mannar was spending a sunny
autumn week at Atlantic City, says the
Washington Star, and every morning on
one of the piers he used to aee a young
lady whose face looked most familiar.
The Judge prided himself on his mem
cry for names and faces, and yet some
how this young lady escaped him. But he
was aure he knew her. and one morning,
though she always studiously avoided his
eve, ho stopped ana anaressea ner wiin
courtly tiollteness.
Pardon me. miss," he said, "your fea
tures are familiar, but, strangely enougn
1 cannot recall the circumstances under
which we met. Vet 1 certainly remember
our having mut somewhere."
An,.meinher " cried the vounn ladv. and
she rose from among her irirnue witn
angi.v and aggressive air.' "Keincmber, you
old scalawag: Well. ou ought to remrm
btr. It's iiol a ye ax since you gave me
I Klu months and for 2 cents I'd pitch
ou over the railing Into the water."
r
Etiquette
llaaated.
1'iiM Political lirafterLld you ever ee
Iiuosev elt ?
.-econd Political tirafter Many a lime.
Kut Political Grafter--Vhere?
.. olid Political Ciafter-ln my sleep.
Chicago News.
MONTiY, ALWAYS MONET.
Guests On entering a house to pay a
call a man should leave his coat and hat In
the hall, but a girl must wear her hat Into
the leception room. The exception for the
girl Is when she Is wearing a heavy fur
coat, such as Is used for motoring. Huch
a garment can be dropped In the hall and
left with the men's wraps. Any other gar
ments are put off when In the room.
On arriving for dinner, to which a man
has been Invited, he gives his name to the
maid to announce him, and takes off his
coat and hat at one. If he is expected
that evening there Is no reason for his de
laying to put off his heavy coat.
A woman gueat should leave her wraps
In the same way, unlesa the dinner Is a
formal one. when she should be invited to
take off hei clothes In a dressing room.
Home Weddlug Arrangements for a
home wedding differ little. If any, from
those for a church ceremony. At home
the bridegroom should stand before the
clergyman, when the bride enters on her
father's arm. The best man is at the
bridegroom's side, and the bridesmaids are
near the bride.
1 lie coding party enters the room previ
ous to the hrlde. precisely as when In
church.
Marking Trousseau All house and body
linen of a bride should ber the Initials of
her maiden name. There Is no exception
to this.
Wedding HreakfaM A nice but simple
breakfast for a wedding party might begin
with grape fruit. Then there should be a
thin soup, beef or chicken bouillon, broiled
squabs with a green salad, then Ices and
rakes. The bride's rake Is not served until
the end of the meal. Coffee, punch or
champagne inav be served.
Marking Wedding Gift A piece of silver
to be given as a wedding present must be
aiajked with the bride's initials and sent
la fear, even though the giver may not
know her. being a friend of the bride
groom's only.
Ned said, "Miss Gelie has been showing
me a little summer gown- she has JuHt
purchased. It's absurd the way they, get
out midsummer things In the middle of
winter, Isn't It?" He said he'd have to
run along, then, and after he left'I talked
a lot about summer , clothes, but Cousin
Anne suspected It was petticoat, and I've
been nervous about them ever since that
day. So when my green one acted so
fiendishly In the park I was determined
not to let him dream that It was one. I
said, "I was wearing a gown of this color
for lunch today and forgot to take It off
before I put on another one."
Better to fib than to say anything that
Is not perfectly proper. I' said, "I'll wait
here while you go and get me a screen."
He finally said he would give me his scarf-
r
Advice to the Court.
J
pin, but I ald Cousin Anne had said I
must never accept Jewelry from young
men. He said, "Oh, I'll lend It to you
I believe you're enjoying this." I said I
really wasn't, because the ground was so
cold. Hut I borrowed his scarfpln after
that and pinned It up in some way and
managed .to walk carefully and slowly to a
taxi. I knew Cousin Anne would disap
prove fearfully of that, but I was afraid
he wouldn't finish the proposal In the 'bus
If It happened to be full of people.
As soon as we got started he went on
and said how much he loved me.
I told him I thought that was awfully
nice of him. He said he had fui'en In
love with me when he first saw me sitting
In a chair at his aunt's house In a big
black hat; I said I should wear the hat a
The Newer Tailored Frocks
"A SK1P.T MADE OK GREEN SATIN IS
COMINO OFF."
rlble vividness beneath my dark rjoth
dretss. He said. '"Good heavens, what s
the matter?" "A skirt, made of green
satin, that I put on before I put on a
skirt made of blue cloth, Is coming off," 1
replied. He looked fearfully bewildered,
but Cousin Anne said I must never, on
any account, mention a petticoat to a
young man. She said so the day Ned Win
ton had gone shopping with me, and 1
had bought such an adorable one. All
gobby with embroidery and the palest pink
ribbons. I was so crazy aliout it I had
to take It home with me instead of having
them send It. and when we got in we
spread it over the back of a chair and Fat
on the sofa and admired It.
We were going to I.oulce I'avliWn's
dance that night and to the Hunters for
dinner, find I finally decided to wear It
over my dreys Instead of under It. as It
waa so good looking. I was JuM about to
try It on when Cousin Anne came In. sue
looked at me. Of course there are looks
Magistrate O'Connor was picking his dis
gruntled way through the rain the other
day, says a New York correspondent. He
had hailed a street car from the pavement,
and, sheltered under hla umbrella, made
for the rear platform, when a four-ton
furniture van whirled on him, drawn by
three bilskly trotting horses. Magistrate
O'Connor escaped demolition by a brisk
sldewlse leap. He called a remonstrance to
the driver. As far as he could see,' that I
personage had his head thrust around the
corner of the furniture van, while he called
back interesting Items to the magistrate.
Magistrate O'Connor chased him In the
street car, caught him at a blockaded cor
ner and had him arrested. The driver ap
peared before O'Connor himself, when the
latter had gotten Into his silk robe of of
fice. "I could send you to the workhouse,"
said the still angry magistrate, "but 1
will let you off with a fine of f 10. 1 In
tend this as a warning to all reckless
drivers." The driver looked at Magistrate
O'Connor sullenly, and thrust his hand Into
his pocket. He peeled off five ones and
started for the clerk's desk to pay.
"Hold on there." said MuK'strate O'Con
nor, gathering up a bunch of his silk gown
In nervous hands. Haven I you anything
to say for yourself?"
"Yes," said the driver, sourly. "They
ought to make you guys wear them
Mother Huhbards on the street, no's a
feller could dodge yuh."
I TBHk C'onnntiram.
Blohhs- Woman Is a conundrum
Slobbs And yet man never wants to i;ie
her up Philadelphia Hecord.
NEW YORK, Jan. IS. The coming three
months are a trying time for the woman
who has essayed over conscientiously to
get through the winter with too meager an
outfit. The situation Is worse It the at
tempt has made .to stuggle along without
any really new gowns at an, aepenaing
upon numberless costumes of a previous
vintage which have been fixed over at
"HE FIRST SAW MK SITTING ON A
CHAIR AT HIS A t'NT'S HOL'SK."
great deal now. He said. "Don't you care
for me at all?" I told him not to ask me
anything like that, as It seemed so tact
less of me not to, and I thought It would
be rather pleasant if I did. He said. "I'm
sure you do. 1 said I thouKht he was
very clever and perhaps If he was sure of
it, I did. I said. "How can we prove It?
1 would like to know very soon, as I am
going to be so awfully buny In a few days
with other things."
He tiled to take my hand, but I dragged
It away instantly. He said. "I am begin
ning to believe you don't, all right." I
told him that was no sign I didn't, but
I didn't think It proper to let a young
man hold my hand. I looked at him ear
nestly and told him I wouldn't dream of
all-ivving It. as I felt sure Cousin Anne
wouldn't approve of it. lie looked at me.
There are looks and looks.
I burst out laughing as the taxi stopped
at our door. Hut they say he is very
lev er.
UNDERESTIMATED.
SBTTLEb.
'Everybody knows ttsrt "ftobtr
on married for money-
"Yea, a check mate, ooat yov
know."
Mretlos Aldrlrk Socially.
Senator A U! rich entered a barber shop
In Washington not long ago and placed
himself under the care of a colored barber.
When the senator was departing through
the door, another customer inquired as to
his Identity.
" 'Deed. sJ," replied the barber, "dat's
Senato' Alrlch, who Is de general man
ager of defe I'nlted States. I had seen 'tin
several times, but nebber met "liii oelllv
I befn' !" New York World.
'We'd -have wen the game II
ur back hadnt lost hui head."
'Heavens! Was it u bad M
that? 1 heard it was only anew I
But do you think ti t wronf to
e rich?"
'Not wrong. tapowiMe."
HEAPS OF THEM.
I ( ifl
id. I
'Do you have any trouble in
getting a maid?"'
' Oh.no! I have had trn difTer
ent ones in the last month."
J
Easter Sunday refurbished with fresh col
lar and cuffs of moire or white flannel.
Neither should it be of an eccentrlo model
that will attract attention at each wearing.
Black with a hair line of white Is very
smart In the early spring suits. Ho is bin
with the same narrow ttrlpe, while purple
of an especially beautiful bluish tone Is to
be the favorite of all colors. Green Is
ever an attractive tone for the first days
of spring and dark green Is among the
most pdpular of the midwinter shades, so
that a costume of dark green serge or
tweed will be smart for the two seasons
for which actually it is bought. Younger
women are to appear again In exquisite
shades of rose, robin's egg, blue and light
wood color, but the matron always looks
smartest In the quieter tones.
While there are inumerable models of
most elaborate and lntrlcute design among
the newest Importations of tailored gowns
from France, still some of the smartest are
extremely simple, and It Is these plainer
designs which the woman with limited
purse should Imitate. It Is specially nd
vlsable, when purchasing at this time of
year, to keep to the simplest models which
will remain smart no matter how many
varied fashions the realm of dress may
undergo. If the outfit has suddenly fflven
out and there Is not one gown which can
be relied upon to carry the wearer success
fully through until spring, altogether the
lest purchase will be a cloth tailored cos
tume made with medium length coat and
a skirt that hangs straight, but "Is In no
way exaggeratedly scant. Braiding Is once
again much In evidence, and Just a small
amount of half-Inch silk braiding will
greatly enhance the effect of the costume.
Black braid la used almost altogether, save
on the light materials, which, Instead of
being braided, are generally trimmed In
some other way. White moire collar, rev
ers and cuffs covered wtlh one thickness
of black chiffon are delightfully smart en
a coat of smooth finished cloth.
.1 '
endless expenditure cf tinie, labor and even
money. For the beginning of the winter all
may have gone well, hut suddenly, with
the beginning of February, conies nn un
pleasant realization of the fact that either
some new frocks must be purchased or re
tirement from all fistlvitlen will be neces
sary. Just what Ii best to buy at this
time of year In also a difficult question.
Naturally, one desires to purchase with
an Idea toward the spring ouiftt, for In
this age of rapid changes of fashion it is
never possible to lay away in camphor any
garment, no matter how good, ami to he
sure that It will be possible to ever don
that garment again.
There are several articles of dress that
can be bought to excellent advantage at
this time of year and the first of these Is
a medium weight cloth suit. Ordered in
this between season, when the tailor estab
lishments have their most quiet time of
the year, special prices are made and tt Is
possible now to procure at reasonable cost
a costume which can be donned at once
ai d which, with the In'erlinlng taken out.
will do service through the entire spring.
This dress must, of course, be selected with
a thought to the double purpose It la to
serve, that of a midwinter and an early
spring costume combined. It should, there
fore, be of Inconspicuous color that It will
not at once be remarked as an old gar
ment when it muki-s lis appearance on
' Meaatr Treatments.
"BUI" Snyder, head keeper of tha New
York Zoo. waa describing to a reporter the
twenty-gallon oil baths that he gave the
elephants In the autumn, when the harsh
beasts began to chap their hides.
"These oil baths Improve the elephants'
looks,' he said. "Ths elephants knew It,
too. The females especially know It. They
take to these beauty treatments the same
as women."
The head keeper chuckled sardonically.
"Women, though, go a step too far," he
said. "A young man from the lion house
told me that at a ball the other night he
said to his hostess:
"Who Is that pretty little blonde eating
lobster salad, ma'am?'
" 'Why. don't you know her?' his hostess
cried. She's the pretty little brunette you
flirted with last week!'" New Tork
Tribune.
THAT FACE.
i
f4
I took photograph of Muto
Okldy yeaterday."
"la aha a friend of yours?"
waa betorw I took
afcture."
tha