Tin: r.KE: omaiia, avkdxksday. xovkmukh 2.1. inio The omaiia ' Daily 1u:y. n"fMn:i) hv riwiti) iiuhkvvatkr. VKTOIt HDSKWATKU, KMTOIl. Entered at Omaha poslofflce a cond clam matter. tkrms op wrnscmrTioN. Kunilnv He. one year..... I! SO Pt 'j rein Hep. one yrtr II W I.lty lt (without Sunday). one year..i 1'aliy He. and Sunday, one year V.'0 DKI.IVKRKIJ f'Y CAHIUKR. F .'renins; Hee (without Hunitay). per week Kc F.venliia: Hee (with Hur.day), per week.. lor Jslly Mr- (Including; Sunday), per 'k.l laliy Hee (without Punla . per week..ltc A.lrlress all rotrnluinta of Irreaulnritle In delivery to Citv Circulation Impertinent OITH'KS. Omaha the Ho HwllfllrlR. Moinh Omaha 4 North Twenty-fourth Btrret Council Uluf fft If, fJr-ott Street. Lincoln T..H Utile Iliilhtinu. 'hli ai lMh Marquette Hiillrilhg Now Vork-Uooms llil-U02 No. M West Thirty-third Mreet. Washington- 12S Fourteenth Ptreet, N. W. CORRKSilONI KNCE. Communications relation to new and editorial matter aliould be addressed: Otiiaha Hee, Rilitorlal 1 epnrtnient. nRMITTANCKS. Remit by dr-jft. express or postal order payable to The He Publishing; Company. Only i!-rent stamps received in payment of mail accounts. 1'ersonnl check except on Omaha and eastern exchange not accepted. STATEMENT OK rlRCT'UATION. Btste of Nebraska. Potigla County. . Ceorg R. Txachtii'.k. treasurer of The new Publishing company, hem duly worn, saya that the actual nutuher of full and complete, oopte. of T,h. Pally, Morn Inn, Kventng and Sunday H printed during; the niontli of October, I10. u ax follow: 1 43.S30 IT 43,370 t 44.700 II 43,360 t 43,960 ! 43.390 4 41.9B0 St 43,810 43,440 It ,,..43,490 .. 43,440 11 43,170 1 43,740 II 43.4S0 43,090 14 44,000 43,700 . t 43.3A0 1 43,SCO t( 43,370 11 43.170 17 43,90 It 43.000 tl 43.4O0 1 43.340 , tl 43,040 1 43.470 II 43,000 1 4300 tl 48,000 44.090 T.tal ' 1,360,740 fUturned Coplae 11,340 Not Total 1,338,390 lally Average 43,174 OKO. H. TZSC1IUCK, Treasurer. Siibacrlbed In my prefiire and sworn to before ma thla 31st day of October. WO. M. P. WALK ICR, eal.) Notary Public Sahaerlfcer. leavlaug (he vliy tem porarily ikonll hare The Bee mailed to them.' Address will be rha.nre aa of tea it reejaeeted. Plums promise to top all fruit cropa text year. Even tho rivers of Paris go iu for the gay life. Bourke Cock ran announces he has retired. What haa he been doing? Caleb Powers' latest term ia for two years in congress at $7,500 per year. "God'a pleasure ia at the end of our prayera," said a great author. Amon. . General Grant calla for an army of 150,060. What haa alarmed the general? One of the last great things Tolstoi did was to express his opinion of Ber nard Shaw. Tho slogan of Buffalo is, "Buffalo means Buaineaa." , Then It does not mean that other? The weather man will be entitled to be included in the reasons for Thauks giving celebration. A late book tella how one may think himself into happiness. The trouble :omea when you wake up. From his Interviews Jacob Rlis aeema to be taking tho results of the election much harder than Colonel Koosevelt. "The moment is not yet," snouts Victor Napoleon, the French pre tender. All right, Are when you're Teady, Grldley. Of course, If Madero and his foolish Mexican followers really must have a fight, those Texas Rangers can surely Interest them. Guatemala has adopted a 12-to-l monetary system. Only four more on the right side and Mr. Bryan would have won down there. If you know of any conventions lying around loose that are worth hav ing notify the Commercial, club, ao that Omaha may nail them down. The Belgium king complains bo cause people keep throwing petitions aver the tranaom at him. . The tran out figured in young Mauuel's case, too. It is suggested that Jack Johnson, aa a faithful son of Texas, be aent out to tho border to meet those Mexican invaders to open negotiations with them. ' Those prohibition states that Insist on searching trucks of travelera for tho elusive elixir of life may compel a man to hide it In hla stomach before crossing the line. Our amiable deiuocrailo contetn porary refers to one of the apokeamen before the city council aa "Union Pa cific Whlttaker." That is the most un kindest cut of ali. Also, you may notice that when meat "as advanced in price it went up at Jumps of S, 6 and 7 centa, while in this decline it comes down by the -cent and Hi cents. h. If w are not mistaken, there are also a few people In Omaha who wish I' the PostofflYe department had snuffed Mjiut certain swindling mining stuck j'4oiiferns btfoie they were atung. 12 Ml Is it on Anti-Diat War! Francisco I. Madrro, wbo wni over whelmingly d'-foaled for president of Mexico and, during the campaign, Im prisoned by President Diaz, In tho re puted leader of the anti-American rioters In Mexico. Thin fact, when all the eircumntancea are appreciated, ought to allay any feeling of apprehen aion ns to the friendly relation exist ing between the povernments of the two republics. Though the successor to (leneral Bernardo Keyea, leader of the anti-American party In 1908. Madi-ro, In all probability, is, not try ing to annoy the government at Wash ington half aa much as he Is seeking to harass President Dias by plunging him Into trouble with the Vnited States. If the disappointed rival of the Mexican executive could precipi tate such a condition It would no doubt gratify him far more than would any Injury he could Inflict on the Americans. The persistency with which . these demonstration! have been carried on and the seriousness with which they are being regarded by the Mexican au thorities suggests the guiding genius of aome crafty and able leader. They can no longer be dismissed aa merely the desultory outbursts of Inflamed fanatics. They must have a head to them, and that head is Some ambitious Mexican who would give all his pos sessions to undermine Dias or to dis credit his administration. But the Diaz government may be expected to guide the ship of ataie out of the troubled waters in due time, exercising its characteristic tact for the preservation of peace with the United States. Goethali the Eight Man. President Taft's visit to the Panama canal has brought out plainly the Tact that the right man waa finally obtained to superintend the gigantic task of building the canal and the president may take all tho personal pride in this he pleases, for he is the one who se lected Major Goetnals of the United States engineer corpa for the work. The progress of the enterprise, ful filling the promise of Its completion a year before the time set; tho lack of friction among the employes and the good physical condition of the men are separate proofs of the peculiar fitness of Major Goetbals. The government waa beginning to grow a little uneasy in its quest for a man who would take hold of this work and carry it through to completion by January, 1916, and the time lost in changes is only an other evidence of the splendid selec tion the president made iu Major Goetbals. Here is a suggestion of the great value the government may make of its army engineers, men trained at Weat Point. Their operations mar aot bo quite as dramatic or Kpectaculi.r- Li j those of the officer on tho field of battle, but we are not fighting many battles nowadays and even if we were it is doubtful If the leader of an army of warriors could offer any service that would rank higher for the genu ine good of his country than that which the army engineer may give in peaceful enterprises similar to, though even of far less magnitude, than the one in which Major Goetnals is just now achieving such fame for himself and results for his country. The gov ernment will have a vast amount of this work to be done In tho next gen eration, perfecting, its schemes of reclamation and conservation and It has only begun to see what splendid resources it has in its military arm. Railroad Expense Account. In the railroad rate hearing before the Interstate Commerce commission at Washington Attorney Brandeis, for the shippers, contends that what rail roads need more than higher rates is more science In their management. If this were applied, he maintains cut ting out waate and needleaa expense they would have no ground on which to base the semblance of a plea for advanced schedules. Whether unscientific or not in their operating methods, the railroads some of them, at least have shown that no such, charge, may be fairly made agalnat their system of book keeping. For instance the New York Central displays post-graduate skill in its accounting department, aa reflected in discoveries made In the course of an official investigation. One of many examples will serve to show the pro digious science developed along these lines. Before going into this, . how ever, it might be well to state that for years the New York Central has fol lowed the plan of charging in every month's expenses one-tenth of a full year's depreciation. Examination of the company's accounts for March is said to show that Instead of charging off one-tenth of the year's deprecia tion, the deductlona covered three months and under the plan, adopted tho expensea for the month were in creased by $373,523. And when an order went out for the demolition of thirty-five locomotives that were unfit for use and the coat of them, placed at $276,000, was chargel to operating expenses for March, as late as June these locomotives were still doing ser vice for the New York Central. This sort of bookkeeping may not be common among railroads, but how does the Interstate Commerce com tulaalon know If they have found it practiced by one of the leading roads? Another thing that must be taken into consideration in connection with the purchase of new rolling stock is the increased capacity nd the dimin ished wear and tear of this equipment, For the modern locomotive the boast la that while It costs more than the old type. It absorbs the extra cost In its capacity for hauling greater tonnage and the claim is made that the steel car, which costs more than the wooden car, also carries more and lasts longer. So that it ia misleading merely to charge against operating expenses Items of this kind without specifying their character. The trouble in all thla rate hearing controversy is that there are too many made-to-order statistical exhibits and not enough frank discus sion of facta as they exist. A Public Defender. Some member of the Douglas dele gation to the coming legislature haa an opportunity to sponsor a reform In the method of defending indigent prig oners that will' save our taxpayers a substantial aum each year. The Bee haa already called attention to the fact that the existing system of appointing special attorneys to defend prisoners accused of crime, who make affidavit of lack of means to hire a lawyer for themselves, is proving merely a practice achool for young lawyers courting favor of the district Judges, while the aggregate bills for their services figure up between $3,500 and $4,000 a year, which would hire a competent public defender at a fair salary and leave the county treasury from $1,500 to $2,000 to the good. As the law now standa the Judges of the district court have it quite within their power to provide this aolution of the problem, but they seem to be indisposed to do so, preferring rather to regard their right to appoint defending attorneys as a part of their judicial patronage to be acattered around where It will do them individ ually the most good. If the judges insist upon being so wasteful with the taxpayers' money perhaps the legisla ture can be persuaded to come to our relief by creating the position of pub lic defender corresponding to that of public prosecutor with a salary equal to what la paid a deputy county attor ney, the place to be filled either by the Judges, the county attorney or the county board. If this law is framed so as to apply onl7 to counties In the population class with Douglas it should encounter no serious opposition in the legislature. After the Gold Brick Man. It is to be hoped that the govern ment's action against the gold brick artist will not end until conditions are created that will make it either im possible or exceedingly dangerous for this class of fakers to continue in bus iness. And Postmaster General Hitch cock seems fully determined on this point. The Idea of the United States mails being employed as tho chief In strument in a system' of fraud that o masses $40,000,000 or $50,000,000 to a set of wild-cat promoters is sim ply astounding. The only criticism to be offered in connection with fed eral disposition is that action was not taken long ago and the swindlers nipped in the bud. If anything, the government has been too patient with these crooks. To be sure, it has sought by other methods to stop them, but these methods have proved thor oughly Inadequate. Now that these amazing frauda have been disclosed the government should have every popular encouragemeut to go on even If it has to place a few men behind the bars in order to es tablish a safe precedent and warning. It would be impossible to determine or even approximate the far-reaching ef fect of this class of swindling opera tions. Not only have thousands of in dividuals been defrauded, but legit imate business Interests have suffered Immeasurably. It should be made dan gerous to engage in the fake stock selling business. The brazen effront ery of the gold brick vender using the United States malls as the machinery of his game Is enough In Itself to In vite a severe penalty. The democratic World-Herald seems to be speculating as to what "gang" Governor-elect Aldrich meant in the statement coming from him from Ohio. It is barely possible that the "gang" Mr. Aldrich has In mind is the democratic "gang" and their brewery allies who put Governor Shallenberger in the state house and have been run ning things there through him and his appointees for two years. Perhaps the failure of election offi cers in one voting district to keep a poll list is due to the impression that the voting machine not only recorded the vote and counted it automatically, but also listed the name of the voters, too, and leave no burden on the Judges and clerks of election but to draw their pay. It ia pleasing to know that the re ported number of bacteria In our city water has been greatly exaggerated. The doctors who have been complain ing about Omaha's distressing health- fulness will have to look elsewhere for relief. Colonel Watterson's front page the day after election looked like a bill board advertisement of the Chantecler. The colonel is excusable, though, in view of the few chances the democratic rooster has had to crow in recent year a. Attorney General Mullen ia not going to miss any chance to play for free advertising during the two months that he has to strut in official peacock feathers. What office ia he framing up to run for? "Ex-Bosa" Croker aaya he will re turn to Ireland la the summer, but for The Avalanche of "Noes." Pioux City Hewlldered mii pui lers of ' popular legle latlon" in South Ikota are wondering wht l the matter. Twelve proportions in all ere ulmltted on tht aeven-foot blanket ballot at the recent election. The return- have not benn accurately tabulated, but it Is plain that all the propooitioiiH. lth poeaibly one exception, were anowed under. The llet submitted com prided good, bad and indifferent law. Rome of them I had been enacted by the legislature, prac tically without opposition. Confronted by that awe lnnpirin; ballot. It appears that the average voter to ik hla little pencil In hand and marked a cros in the "no" squares all the way down tha Mat. Theoret ically he should vote "yeV on the good laws and "no" on the bad or Indifferent. Actually he took a wallop at all of them. What waa the matter with the voter? Waa he dHgurted over the siise of the bal lot and the difficulty of voting his senti ments intelligently? Was lie mad at the county optlonlsts and equal suffragists for not accepting previous expressions on the same proportions? Waa he too indifferent to the prlvllee of voting directly on legis lation to try to Inform himself on the merits of the questions submitted? Nobody knows Just what was the matter with Mr. Voter, but everybody agrees that the refer endum wasn't worth the 1160.000 or mote that It cost. And a great many former ardent supporters of the referendum Idea ara ready to admit that they want no more such referendum. Indeed, the result of the balloting- la generally Interpreted to mean that this is the vt av voters feel about it. Supporters of tlis Inltative and referen dum principle ara reluctant to admit that the people do not want to be bothered with direct legislation. They are more In clined to seek aome fault in the application of the principle. The firet guess is that it has been made too easy to sat the wheels of direct legii-lation going. In order to propose a new law or to refer a law enacted by the legislature It is necessary to get up a petition containing the names j the winter he wants a warmer clime. It was the general understanding that he left New York in the first place to escape its warmth. Our old friend, Edgar Howard, spoiled the game of the lobbyists to control the democratic legislative or ganization two years ago, and he may have to repeat the performance soon. The wonder Is that that Tennessee court did not have Judge Landls ar rested for presuming to levy that fine on the Oil trust in the first place with out waiting for its aid or consent. Colonel Watterson was right. Colonel Roosevelt is the ' man on horseback." To prove it he has Just bought a new charger from a Ken tucky neighbor of Marse Henry. A Difference In the lomlii. Washington Herald. Now, aome of Air. Cannon's former -Hi-. are insisting that Mr. Clark can have nothing but a denatured speakership. Talk About fiold Mines. Chicago Reoord-Herald. An Iowa man PaJS tios the mhtr a. for ten eai'S of COriV Tet there are lunnla who risk their lives Jiuntlng for gold. tit-Hlng Away from Trouble. Washington Star". Mr. W. J. Bryan Is going hunting-. There Is nothing like a ahot gun or a camera to take a, man's mind off his political troubles. Fray Ins; for Knldawi-e. Houston (Tex.) Post (dem.) Now let the democracy consecrate ita energies to the single purpose of showing the country that Jt can be a majority party without causing- Deoula to think that tha world has placed a premium on those mental and moral Deouliarltlea which distinguish Idiots from rational beings. Now Will Von Be Good f Rockwell (Ia.) Phonograph. The PhonrwraDh tin nin n f.ui, i. the upright, progressive, political Integrity o- ineoaore Koosevelt. and believes that the bis Stick In his bands la never wlet.i. In an unjust cause. With Roosevelt this paper ia enlisted not lor ninety days, but until the close of the war. Take that, darn you Sport that Tempt Death. Baltimore American. The theory that It is better to kill a few boys in rough gam than to bring up a race or mollycoddles Is susceptible of ar gument It seems as though the resource of this age ought to be able to bring np a strong, healthy and couragcoua race of men without making college sport a mat ter of life and death, or considering It necessary to have human sacrifice of fared for the good of the rest. That Is rather too much like a barkening b.ack to the old pagan times to fit in with these enlight ened ones. "COBBLER, STICK TO TUB I. 4 ST," Const Tolstoi's I'nlqae Hernrd aa a Bootmaker. Philadelphia Record. The story la told of Tolstoi bestowing a pair of the boot he made with hi own hands upon one of the countless tramps ho get everything they could out of the counts As soon a the tramp was well out of sight of Krasnaya Polyana he threw the boots away. He waa seen and taken to task for this and replied: "Tha count like to make boot and give them away, but every tramp in Russia know that you can't walk In them." Thla la supported by another story of an American admirer of the count, who asked a peaaant of the neighborhood If the count made good boota. "They are perfectly worthless," was the reply. Probably the world would get along better if the cobbler tuck to hi laat and the literary man to hi pen. Brook Farm waa established by victim of the common delusion that intellectual workers ought to be workers with their hands. After trying the experiment for some time Hawthorne taid It did Dot Improve hi literary work to spend a part of each day "a chamber, maid to a cow." I Our Birthday Book ITovemVer S3, 1110. Franklin Pierce, fourteenth president of the United State, waa born November 'A 19W, at Hillaboro. N. II., and died in lau. It was during hi administration that the Kansas-Nebraska bill wa passed under which Nebraska waa organised a a terri tory. George II. MoCielUn, who wa mayor of New York preceding Mayor Oaynor, I 4&. He 1 the son of the union general of the same name and wa born in Dresden. He wa a member of congress at the time be wa chosen mayor of Nw York. Journal. of only i per cent of the voteia. It is reluctantly admitted tiiat no law enacted by the legislature is likely to be so good that S per cent tit the voters will not slan a petition against it. And It is ad mitted with equal reluctance that no law proponed by Initiative Is likely to be bau that 5 per cent of the vuteis not sign a petition In favor of It. It Is easier to sign a petition than to refuse and justify refusal by argument. There fore, it is suggested. If the power of direct legislation Is to remain with the voters the difficulty of appealing to it should be Increased. This Is a humiliating admission for any supporter of the principle to make, but it is now being made freely In Noutn Uakota by supporters of the principle. Suggestions are offere,) that the required percentage should be increased to 10. hi. 20. 25, or even 30 per cent. The suggestions are logical. The bigger the petition re quired, the more trouble and expense will tie involved In circulating it and the more chance the circulators will get tired and quit before the necessary number of signers lias been secured. The fewer propo sitions submitted to the voters, the more probability that they will deal with them Intelligently and patiently. If the law Is to be amended, rather thnn repealed, there Is another point worthy of consideration. Tha blanket ballot should be done away with. The measures should be submitted by title only, and the wording of It should be made clear enough to give the voter a good understand! meaning of the law. Still another lesHon Is suggested by the South Dakota experience. Decisive defeat of any measure at any referendum should put It out of the running for a period of years. The votevs do not want to pais upon county option and woman suffrage and similar matters at every election. Once defeated, they ought to stay defeated for awhile. If this result cannot be attained In the Interests of political peace there Is likely to be a popular protest that will throw the whole machine into the discard. Around New York Xdpples oa the Current of X. fa a Been la the Great Amrloaa afetropoUa from Day to Day. There la something funny and fakerish about the way apartments are rented In New Tork. In nearly all Instances when an applicant asks what the price of an apartment is. he Is told that It Is "so mtich a month, with one month free." Occa sionally two months free are allowed, and this cuts the rent materially. The reason for this Is because the owner of the house, who may want to sell, likes to show that the monthly rent roll Is a certain sum the larger the better. That is all very fine, but the investor who is thinking about buying a house knows that the tenants have had their apartments one or two months rent free, and he figures accordingly. No one 1 deceived and no great harm I done, except such harm as follows a deception a transparent a a glass trust. "I'm lookin' for some of mah folk to come to the front and fight for me," said an aged negro as he walked Into the cor. oner's office In the Criminal Courts build ing. "Mah boy Jid is charged with killing a man." "Who are your folk?" .xked Coroner Winterbottom. "Mr. Jltrtmy Osborne, "replied the old fellow, "You don't mean James W, Osborne?" asked the coroner. "Yessah; that's Mlstah Jimmy Osborne," wna tha reply. "Tell him old Uncle Peter la yere and needs him." A clerk waa instructed to commuunicate with Jamea W. Osborne, former assistant district attorney, over the telephone. "tTncle Peter!" came back the response. "Tell him either I or a man from my of fice will be with him in a minute." Ina few minutes James W. Osborne, a nephew of the former member of the din trio t attorney's staff, reached the coroner's office to look after the interests of Uncle Peter's "Boy Ed." It waa learned that the old negro had been a slave on the plantation of Osborne's father near Char lotte, N.' C, before the civil war. For hiore than a quarter of a century the bridge commissioner ot New York City and New Jersey have been considering plans for a bridge across the Hudson river. For a time Fifty-ninth street waa consid ered a a favorable point from which to tart the structure, but on account of the high cost of land in Manhattan needed for the approach that bad to be abandoned. After many conferences One Hundredth and One Hundred and Seventy-ninth streets were selected as favorable points of departure, the choice between them to be determined by minor conditions. On the basis of recent testa of the river bed, how ever. Dr. Kuni, chairman of the geological section of the New York Academy of Sci ences and also the president of the Scenic and Historic Preservation society, delivers the expert opinion that nowhere below Storm King ia there a bedrock accessible to support the piers of a bridge. The dis tance between shores, starting at the two points designated, are 3.9U0 and 4.4U0 feet, respectively, and a middle pier would be essential to the support ot tha proposed structure. No single span for such a dis tance would be safe or feasible. In the opinion of Dr. Kuns this part of the river waa In prehistoric times a deep arm of the aa and Its depth In preglaclal times must have been about TOO feet. The borings recenly made at various points went down a far as VQ feet without find ing anything more solid than silt and aand mud, and this, it is claimed, must dissipate the hopes and dreams of all those who have wished and expected to see In the not dis tant future a splendid structure spanning the noble river. Plana for underground connection of lo cal transportation system with the new Grand Central station provide for four uperlmpoaod subway beneath Forty-second street. Of these the uppermost will be a concourse, from which access may be had to any of the three levels below it, which will no doubt be extended east to Lexing ton avenue, connecting there with the propobed trl-borough route. Below this point concourse la tha 'level of tha present lnter-borough subway. The floor of this tunnel will become the roof of the station of the McAdoo tubes at the Orand Central, and below that will be the Belmont tunnel to Kong Island City, the operation of which seem to be getting within the range ot probability as the result of the luterborough company' latest proposals. Taken as a whole, the new plans af ford a most striking Illustration of New York's underground development. The new terminal will provide facilities fur handling iOU, 000,000 passengera a year mere than five times lis present capacity but with the arrangements which have been made for reaching and leaving the station without coming to the street the immediate neighborhood around the Orand Central will give only alight Indication of! thla great Increase In traffic. "NoAIuml" Ko Lime ess,Wlsa .r I -,r- -4V r 4x VAlvm La food mt Pnf. J Read tho iabct. Duy no baking powder unless tho Cream of Tartar puarantco la civenm riTi r--i riTfo) CRCAM Ml MEM A straight, honest. Cream of Tartar Baking Powder. Made from Grapes. Malccs better, more healthful food. Ccld vitlsaut desertion a PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT. Yankee ssllors seem to be having a good time abroad. When Jack Is ashore he doesn't care much whose shore it lb. A murder eight years old haa been un earthed in New York, and the police serin Just aa much interested as though it were one of the fresh ones. Juan Burcei, a Mexican, has Just died at San Diego at the age of 122 years. This country waa only twelve yeara old when he was born. In some respects his own country Is not yet that old. Mrs. Campbell of Philsdelplila told the suffrage convention at Harrisburg that she wanted to vote because she paid taxea the same aa a man. There is a calm and logical spirit Iu this far more effective than the hurling of a brick through a parlia ment window. "John D. Rockefeller has Just been at the horse show for the first time in his life," observes th. Brooklyn K&gle. "The horse I not run by gasoline, but only in rare Instances, when fed on by-product gluten meal, bought at 25 Broadway at $-' a ton, doea the horse contribute to the Rockefeller lnoome. The horse, there fore, like the landscape, may be enjoyed by Mr. Rockefeller as a pleasing anterior arrangement." SMILING REMARKS. "How Is your wife getting on with her social settlement work?'' "Great. She' had her picture In th paper twice thla month." Detroit Free Press. "Pop. will you tell me one tiling?" "What ia It, my on?" "When they have pets on shipboard, do they prefer old aea dog to ocean grey hounds?" Baltimore American. "Well," said the cheery citizen, "Thanks giving day will soon be here." "Yes." replied the apprehensive man. "It'a going to be the aame old struggle with mince pie and turkey and sage and MOICH HI t aline X BLAC.s i WHITt ' HOuat o cchO"i i I Rr Social Arrangements Social life iu forty thousand Americnu cities and towns has been made brighter by the Local and I.on Dis tance Lines of the Hell Telephone System. Dell Service is today serving tie social Hoods of twenty-five million of people over fiv million tele phones. One pcrsou in every five in America uses tbe Hell Telephone every day, because it Is tbe only telephone that gives universal service. & NEBRASKA TELEPHONE CO. r Pliosphaic X aeMa.'ej3WWa1saaage. s V v. therefore act aa a poise." YmU Vuvmity. onions and things. 'Couldn't we xtsrt s movement to make Thanksgiving one of the safe and sane, - .holidays'.'" Chicago Journal. Bawlln What ran you do with, a bo that's full of pure cussednesa? cliayne If It's strictly' pure, with no ad mixture, nothing. Chicago Tribune. Dr. Thirdly I fear you didn't enjoy the sermon this morning. 1 was Buffering with neuralgic pains In my head. Mrs. Jones, me. doctor, I wotildn t have thought from your talkln you had a pain or au thing in your head.--Llfe. "A waiter was arrested at the club to. day rii.1 the policeman asked me where h. could take him to question him." "What did you say?" "I told him to take him to the grill room." Haiti mo te American. Cousin Hob So Arthur proposed, last night? Maud Yes. Cousin Bob And did ydil accept blm" Maud I was ho awfully exalted I don t know whether 1 accepted him or not. T: he comes tonight 1 did. and If he-ilo,..-n i 1 didn't. Kansas City Journal. SARTORIAL CLERGY. (Clarence Snyder In Puck.t The north wind slirleks the knell of sum mer days, The falling leave foretell tha coming snows; My last year's suit has gone Its devious wavs. 1 And 1 mu. have an overcoat, Ood knows! i I Now fades the glimmering five-spot from my sight, A lonely meg la all my pocket boasts; The rest, It does appear, has taken flight And lined tip with the dead past s other ghosts. Benea th this straw-lhatched lid. this light relght ntt. ' ' ' 'r,'-' -v. Where heaves the akin In many a gooae- pimp'd heap, Kai-h in his cosy nook ambushed for loot. The rude germs of tuberculosl sleep. The breesy call of some tailor's ad. The dummies leering from behind th. glass, No more can make my youthful heart beat glad The credit man has done his worst. Ala.! ZZ3 BLACK & WHITE SCOTCH WHISKY All article to become popular must have merit. That is -why Black k White has a larger sale than an j' other Scotch whisky in the United States. IS ALL RIGHT Ij8MMj"ffffffIMjn: A. F. McAdamty Local Manager.