Features of the Elks Fair
Photographs Taken for The
Illustrated Bee by a Staff Artist
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"RUIIES" WATCH TUB RACKS.
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GYPSY MAIDKNS WHO HAVE A IIOOTH OF THEIR OWN.
SIX OK THE JAPANESE MAIDENS.
SIS HOPKINS AND HE II MA READY TO MEET THEIR
FRIENDS.
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GUM GIRLS IN A LINE.
TWO OF THE GEISHA GIRLS FROM THE
BOOTH.
JAPANESE
COMMITTEE OF ARRANGEMENTS.
"RURES" FROM THE COUNTRY STORE POSE FOR THE
ARTIST.
Gleanings from the Story Tellers' Pack
H
lERE Is ono tbo Portland Oregonlun
heard ono railroad man tell an
other In a depot up the lino tho
other day:
"Wo picked up a now Irishman
somewhere up-country and set him to work
rakln' on a construction train nt 3 cents
a nuio tor wages, uno uay wuen mm an
mo was on tho train she got away on ono
o' them mountain grades, and tho first thing
wo knowed sho was flyln' down tho track
at about ninety miles an hour, with nothln'
In sight but tho ditch and tho happy huntln'
grounds when wo come to tbo end. I
twisted 'em down as hard as I could all
aiong tho tops, and then of a sudden I seo
Mlko crawlln' along toward- tho end of ono
of tho cars on all fours, with his face tbo
color of milk. I thought ho was gottln'
ready to jump, an I seo his finish It bo did.
" 'Mike,' I says, 'for Ood's sake don't
jump.'
"He clamps his fingers on the runnln'
board to give him a chanco to turn round,
and, lookin' at mo contemptuous, answers:
" 'Jump, Is It? Do yoz think I'd bo ofther
Jumpln' an' mo makln' money as fast as 1
am?' "
A mlddlo-aged woman called at a chem
ist's In Camden one evening, says the Phil
adelphia Bulletin, and asked for morphine,
and tbo shopman replied to her request
with:
"Is It for your husband?"
"Oh, no, sir; I have not got any."
"You don't think of suicide?"
"Far from it."
"What do you take It for?"
"Must I toll you, sir?"
"You must, or otherwise I can't supply
you."
"Well, then, don't you think that a woman
40 years old, who has had her first offer of
marriage less than an hour ago, naturally
wants something to quiet hor nerves and
glvo her a good night's sleep?"
Tho druggist thought so, and she went
away contented with tho nerve-soother.
They aro tolling n story of William II.
Crane to tho effect that when bo was lost
In London ho was Invited to dine at tho
House of Commoni restaurant, and his host
ordered a kottlo of Irish whisky, from which
ho poured frequently and copiously.
"Say," said Mr. Crane, "do all you En
glish statesmen partako as liberally and ns
frequently of that liquid as this?"
"Wo do," said tho host.
"Well, all I'vo got to remark Is, that I'm
not surprised that tho Doer war continues,"
said Mr. Crane.
Ono day recently, folates tho Chicago
Chronicle, an old gentleman entered a
downtown olllco and went up to the tablo
whore James, tho office boy, was reading
tho next to tho last chapter In ono of tho
Dcadwood Dick novels. James did not
know for several minutes that anyone had
called, so eager was ho to find out If Dick
was really going to kill tho villain at last
and savo tho blue-eyed Catherine. Looking
up just a moment before getting ready to
plungo Into tho crisis, James caught sight
of the gentleman standing before him. In
somo way tho offlco boy folt that the visitor
had been there a long time and ho hastened
to make up for tbo neglect.
"Anything I can do for you?" James
askod In tbo tone his employer uses when
ho wants to make the best Impression.
Tho old gentleman said nothing, but ho
looked at James In n strango way that
made that young man feel a little ashamed
of hlmsolf,
"I am very sorry, sir, I kept you waiting.
Do you want to seo someone, sir?"
Still tho visitor was silent. Then tho boy
raised his volco and a glimmer of light
camo Into tho old gontloman's oyo. Ho
took out of his pocket a long tubo, put one
end to bis ear and banded the other to
Jnmes. "I should llko to speak to your em
ployer."
"Certainly, sir," said tho obliging oftlco
boy, "hold tho lino."
Thoro Is something fascinating about tho
Swede, says tho New York Evening Post.
Ills honor and candor cannot fall to appeal
to thoso who study him, and seo in him a
lineal descendant of Hcnglst and Horsa.
Tho breezy breath of tho brine clings to
him. Ills generic namo Is OIo. One of
these typical sons of tbo north camo Into
New York harbor a fow days ago on board
a bark. As ho passed Bedlow's Island he
looked up at tho Statue of Liberty. A
heavy fog hung over tho harbor and Olo
looked around at tho pall which hung over
everything.
"Und dot Is Llpcrty undllghtcnlng de
world!"
Ho looked around dolefully. Tho fog was
growing thicker and his mind scorned to
rovort to "Tho Land of tho Midnight Sun."
Tho ba'swaln'B whlstlo sounded, and Ole
took his placo on tho bow, but thoso who
wero near enough to hear and comprehend
his patois caught a stago whisper to this
effect:
"Und dis Is New York! Tako mo pack to
tho Midnight Sun."
A big, good-natured farmer was awaiting
the suburban train, accompanied by a hand
some Gordon setter, relates tho Daltlmoro
Sun. Two sons of Britain stood near him.
Tho dog strayed away from his owner, who
was reading a newspaper.
"Hey!" called tho farmer. "Como hero,
Locksmith," and tbo dog Immediately ran
to his feet.
Ono of tho Englishmen npproached the
farmer.
"May I ask," he said, "what you called
that dog?"
"Locksmith," said tho farmer.
"And why, pray?"
"Becauso every time I kick him ho makes
a bolt for tho door."
Thoro was a general laugh, In which tho
Englishman joined.
When ho returned to his companion he re
marked: "Most extraordinary namo that man over
there calls his dog."
"What?" asked hts friend.
"Locksmith," replied tho first Briton.
"And why such a namo?"
"Becauso, ho says, every time ho kicks
'lm ho bolts for tho door."
Nat Goodwin, tho actor, has a remark
able memory for faces and has frequently
boasted among his friends that onco ho has
seen a man and talked with him, oven for
a fow minutes, hp never forgots that man's
face. This highly dovolopod faculty, re
ports tho Now York Times, was put to a
triumphant test the other ovonlng soon
after tho return of tho actor from his
European trip.
Ho was Beatcd with a party of friends In
n Broadway cafo when his attention becamo
il voted upon a well dressed man sitting nt
a tablo a short distanco nway.
"There's a man whoso faco Is ns familiar
to mo ns though I bad seen til in blit yester
day," remarked tho comedian to his friends,
"but for tho life of mo I cannot placo him
In my memory."
None of tho party remombercd over hav
ing seen tho stranger beforo, and Mr. Good
win, after worrying over tho thing and
cudgeling his brain for a time, could stand
the suspenso no longer and wont over to
tbo stranger.
"Pardon mo, sir," said the actof In bis
most pollto tones, "but I feel as It I know
you well. So stupid of mo In forgetting
your camo. I am Mr. Goodwin 'Nat' Good
winand I trust your memory Is better
than tnlno and that you can recall where
wo havo met."
"Certainly, Mr. Goodwin," replied tho
stranger with a profound bow. "I havo tho
first chair at 'a shop up hero on Broad
way. I shaved you yestorday."
"Ah, so you did; so you did," replied tho
comedian In far-away tones. "I am glad
to meot you again."
Thon Mr. Goodwin west back to bis party
and callod for something all around.
Representative Llttlefleld of Malno Is tho
fastest talker In the house. He Is a terror
to tho official stenographers. Henry U.
Johnson of Indiana, who servod several
torms In congress, was probably the fastest
epcakor over In tho house. Ho talked
more than 300 words a mlnuto. Mr. Lit
tlofleld sometimes gots very close to the
300 mark.
Tho lawyors wero discussing tho merits
and domcrlts of a well known member of
tho Now Orleans bar who had boen gath
ered to his fathers, relates tho Times
Domorrat. One of tho party recalled tho
tlmo when ho studied in tho old man's
office
Wo had a copying clerk, whoso Inofll
elency continually worked the judgo up to
a point of explosion. Ono day a wire basket
fell off the top of bis desk and scratched
his cheek. Not having any courtplnstcr,
ho slapped on threo postage stamps nml
went an with his work.
A llttlo later ho bad somu papers to take
to tho United States court, and, forgetting
nil about tho stamps, ho put on his hat
and went nut.
As ho entered tho olllco tho judge raise!
his head and fixed him with nil astonished
stare. Tho clerk stopped and looked fright
oncd, and finally asked:
"Anything or wrong, sir?"
"Yes, sir!" thundered tbo old gentleman.
"You aro carrying too much p6slago for
second class matter!"
Some Sort of a Show
The rat catcher's wagon had stopped at
tho curbing, roports tho Brooklyn Eagle.
Tho shoppers gathered In considerable
numbers to look through the wlro screens
and tho glass sides, for tho rat In captivity
has a weird fascination for women. Under
safo conditions sho likes to Inspect tho
enemy.
Two Jaunty mascullno strollers also wero
of tho crowd.
"By Goorgo!" exclaimed ono, as ho mado
a prctonso of looking under tho wagon,
"thoy'ro gottlng out."
Thoro wore screams In various keys, a
quick grabbing of sklrta nnd a feminine
Btampedo. Tho women rotlred Into door
ways and backed up against tho walls, at
the samo tlmo taking tho customary pro
cautions to provent nny stray rodent from
thinking bo could find seclusion In their
raiment.
"Thoro!" cried tho youth who had first
spoken, pointing In tbo direction of the
largest bovy of protty girls. "Don't you
seo them?"
Tho other young man looked and nodded,
while the girls took still further precau
tions aa they danced about nnd looked
vainly for somo sign of a stray rnt.
Whllo tho excitement was subsiding the
two young men lcisuroly sauntered away.
"Surely you will now admit my conten
tion," romarked tho first, apparently re
suming an Interrupted conversation, "that
all tho essential features of a good burles
que can bo bad for less than tho box office
srlces?"
