THE OMAHA DAILY BEE , } | FU1DAY , NOVEMBER 27 , 1891. THE BEE. . ROHEWATEII. KlUTOli. EVEUY MOltNING TI.HM3 OP SUIISOIUI'TIOH. pnlly lice ( without Sunday ) Ono Year. . . .ISO Iliilly nntl Sunday , Ono Yunr. . 1J 6i.T.Monih . go Three Montlm . * J fiiimliijr lice , Ono Ytvir. . 2 0 < fiiiturdny lice. Ono Your . } g Weekly lice , Ono Your. Omaha. Tlio Hoc . PouthOmiihn. corner N imcl Sfilh Btroow. Couiioll Illniro. la 1'cnrl Street. GhlcncoOI1lco.ti7 : I Iwinlicr of Commerce. Now York.lioonn t , II nml I.Vfrllmno llutldlnj WashlnRton , Bill l-'ourtuotitli Struct , COKKKSI'ONPKNCK. All communications relating to news am' e'lltorlnl matter should bo addressed to tin Kdltorlal I'cinrtmunt. ' W9INKSH I.BTTEH8. All binlnes letters and remittances shoult lw addressed lo The lieu I'ubllshlii' ? Company Omaha. Drafts , checks mill poslolllco order ; to bo imnlu p ij'iiblo to the order of tlio com P ny. BWOKN STATEMENT OP CIKOUI.ATION Citato of Nebraska ls , County of llouiflas. 1 _ . „ Oeo. II. T/.tclmi'k. secretary of TUB llr.t I'ubllHliltr. company. docs solemnly nwnai that tlio actual circulation ( if TUB IMII.V HES fnrtlw ) wcok ending November SI , l Jl , was u > . Monday. .Nov. l . KM' ] ' Tuesday , Nov. IT . ur Wednesday. Nov. IS . Kl..lr 2 hursday , Nov. 1(1 ( . . .11 J'rldny , .Nov. " . . 2 = 1.30 , Saturday , Nov. 21 . 2I.71J Avcrapo. . . . . 1M . I 7.1 CJBC ) . II. TX.90UIJOK. Sworn to before rnc and Hiibserlhod In my presence III s Mist day of Novombnr , A. O. 1801. SKA i. N. I' . KKIU Notary 1'ublic. T IIP prnwth of tlio average dally circulation of Tnr. IIKK for six years Is shown In vlio fol lowing table : ISS7 IRRS lisSD 18-.IU IB-.II .Innnnrj . ItUiv ; lfi.2l ' . I ' .T i ln , . ' Vi 28,410 1ebrnnrr lIMM II.I'.H I.V.MI I8.1WI IS.7UI ' Wnrcl II .KIT 1 4,11)1) ) I9.IW ) . r-M'.il n. ; i in lfl.714 IH.S.W ZI.1IM Mar I4.KT 17.181 I8.BW 21I.ISO 311.841 Juno 14.147 I'J.24.1 IS.8M ' . ' 11.1117 r.vin I8JJW 18.7.H 27,021 .Aiinuxt I'.M'il ' I8.BSI . hrptemlKT. 1 : ! . ( ) u.nr.i 18.7111 2H.R70 f etolipr. . . . U..NI I8.H4 ( 'j.lUO H..Ni I'.UIU. f ccomhci. . IS.2I7 15.UI1 : u.oisi2.i , < ; i APTKU n suaponslon of eight long months our. esteemed exchange , the an- liquo and unique Co ijrcs.iio nl llccord , shortly rostiino Tin- : two prohibition candidates ran just enough nhoad of their ticket to defeat Senator Shntnway and olout Mr. llndloy regent of'tho university. MILLING in transit rates are fair to Shippers nnd the roads , nnd of the utmost importance to the citi/.ens of Ne braska and Oinnha. Lot us have thotn. IP CIIIKP OIL iNsi'Kcrrou CAUNS will peruse THU BKB carefully from day to clay ho will loam how to porforra his duties honestly , elllciontly and promptly. SINCI- ; his return from Europe , it is observed , lion. Shelby M. Cullom. has taken no especial pains to inject the elixir of life into his little blossom of a boom. Junoic CUAWPOKD of West Point has boon twice beaten for district judge by Judge W. P. Norris. This ought to satisfy the Elkhorn valley democratic fitatoamnn , but ho has appealed to the courts to make it three times and out for . good. _ _ _ _ _ _ AND now comes the omnipresent ' 'con fidential friend" giving nwiiy alleged Bocrots showing that Uliilno will or will not bo n candidate for president and that Harrison expects tobo ronominatod. The "confidential friend" is nsually a fakir and n very tiresome ono at that. GKUMANY proposes to increase her offootivo naval force by upwards of 0.000 men , and yet the young emperor only the other day expressed tlio opin ion to the recruits of the guard in Ber lin that tlioy would novorbo called upon to provo their fidelity by actual .war. A SPECIAL peculiarity of the pori- edical rumor of trouble among the In- diiins of South Dakota is that the peri odical rumor generally originates at Bomo village or hamlet remote from the reservations. The farther it is from the Supposed danger tlio moro alarming and improbable the story. TIIK South Dakota liar is again in the harness. Ho telegraphs two or three times a week that the Indians are about to go on the war path or do something equally improbable. If the citlv.ons of South Dakota would scalp this liar tlioy would perform a valutiblo service for tholr state and country. THE niggardliness of the government toward some Important branches of the publio service is illustrated In that ot the Life Saving service , where the an nual percentage of resignations of com petent inon who go into moro remuner ative callings reaches HO per cent. These men curry their lives in tholr hands and yet their pay is so meager that they can bo tnlcjn into other loss htr/ardous occu pations at higher salaries. WIIKN a general freight agent cannot out a rate without involving himself in the danger of arrest and imprisonment things have come to a pretty pass , How does the government expect ono general freight agent to dif fer from another If they tire all forced to abide by the solemn agreements made with each othorV The reputation of n gonornl freight ogoat depends upon his ability to got business nway from rivals nnd this thing of arresting him for giving a shipper an inside rate is really embarrassing. MlC. .TOSKl'lI CllAMIIKULAUV , at the conference of the National Union of Conservative Associations In Birming ham , England , announces that the unionists and conservatives will remain In harmony "until tlioy have finally do- fontod the conspiracy ajrnlnst the om- plro , " and that their Joint olTorts would "fflvo the people legislation based upon true donlooratio Instlnots. " Tlio para doxical character of these sentiments nro apparent only , not roal. The British empire In England is rapidly becoming democratic. Monarchy IB nlmply an ox- ponslvo luxury handed down from feudal times , llko the English landtunuro. The people of Great Britain coino quite as close to the power which actually rules nnd legislates us the people of America. uir Ann oirX /OTIO.V. . The Invootlpntlons of Tim BEK'S spo cinl oil commissioner are rovonllnir r vnsl amount of carelessness In the mat lor of oil Inspection. His carefully prepared pared reports thus far show that the ol ! inspectors are not so much Interested Ii protecting the pcoplj from Inforloi illuminating oils as In making sura ol tholr foes. The tnsts made are oftot nominal. In many instances tanks ol oil nro sold without so much as a hint at inspection. In other cases the rotnil casks and tanks which Imvo bocr slntnpod na tested are used time after tltno without , further Inspec tion. In ono Instance the brands of a retired Inspector were found In pos' session of ono doator who was at llbo rtj to use them as ho liked. Talcing all these facts , in connection with the methods of their appointment , thu Inherent wo.ikneM of the law Itnolf and tliooxtromoly liberal interpolation of its conditions which oiitiblcM corpora tion con.sutnors of oil to escape oil censorship at the hands of inspectors , it must bo clear to the reader that oil in spection is a miserable farce , as now conducted. When the Inspectors nnd deputies have looked in upon the deal ers long enough to collect ten cents a barrel Ihoy are too often con tent , without us much as going through the motions of making a fair test according to the terms of the inspection law. The Standard Oil com pany has mnnagod by its shrewdness in enacting this law to mtiko Nebraska the roftibo tank for its rejected eastern oil and nt the same time to crowd out of the state about nil opposition. Weak ns the law is , its proper enforce ment might provo beneficial to the pub lic. There would bo some satisfaction in Knowing that the oil sold in the state and . used in the dwellings of all our citlxons had boon tested and found up to the standard required of 100 ° Hash test. There is reason to suspect , however , that a vary largo proportion of the oil otTorcd to our people is inferior to that quality. Tlio fault lies primarily with the Standard company , which can nsjrendily test Us ollt as any inspector nnd should bo severely punished for violations of tlio law. The cupidity of that monopoly , howovcr , is well known and it is not nbovo imposing the inforlor article upon a community which permits the Standard Oil company to manipulate its legislature in making the inspection law , and appoints its inspectors not on ac count of fitness for the duties to bo per formed but to pay them for political services. The people voted the generous sum of $400,000 lor parks at the last election. The Board of Park Commissioners an nounced informally in advance of the election what tracts , except ono in the south part of the city , they should pur chase if bonds were voted. Although the proposition as voted upon by tlio people did not definitely indicate the lands to bo obtained , the park commissioners fool morally bound to expend the funds from the sale of bonds for the lands which had boon se lected in advance of election. This will secure to the city the Distin tract , lying one-half milo north of the Deaf and Dumb institute , the Pnr- tcor tract north onst of Fort Omaha and the ISlmwooti. park addition on West Leavonworth street. They are all admirably located and the best lands that were offered , price and purpose considered. B'omis park in the center of the city will likely bo secured and some suitable tract in the south part of Oinaha will later bo determined upon. There is no reason , so lar ns TIIK BKK can soo. for any change of plan with re gard to those nark purchases. When the south park hns boon selected , the entire system will bo complete nnd boulevards and small parks in the in terior connecting them can bo so designed and secured by condem nation as to make Omaha famous for her parks and boulevards. Port Omaha on the north will in all probabil ity bo donated to the city for a park by the general government. Syndicate park within the limits of South Omaha will sooner or later bo added to the sys tem. Probably some generous property owners will fill In small and largo tracts hero and there where needed. In fifteen or twenty years wlion the improvements have boon duvoloped wo shall have a park and boulevard system which will make every citizen of Omaha thankful for the election of IS'Jl. IlUKlHSll /.l/.tf///M 7MO.V. The statement that North Dakota Is likely to'bo Hooded with pauper immi grants from Europe unless vigorous monsuros .iro taken to prevent it , nindo on the authority of an agent , of the Treasury dt > partmont , will doubtless receive prompt attention at Washington. According to this agent immigrants are Hooking into Winnipeg in largo num bers , principally from Rupsia , many of whom will cross the border Into the United Slates unless inspection stations are established and ofllulont moans taken to exclude such as are olassud undeslra- blo by the Immigration law. The diflluulty is that there is no authority to establish inspection stations on the border , and provision for them is ono of the matters to which congress should give early attention. It Is obvious that , however vigilant and olllolont the inspection of immigrants at the seaports may bo , and It is now being conducted with moro thoroughness than ever before , wo shall not bo able to keep out all the undesirable classes until wo have established inspection at every ac cessible point on our borders , or made some arrangement wltli the Canadian government by which it will agree not to permit the oltusos oxoludod by our laws to coino from its ter ritory into the United States. This matter of protecting our borders Is pur- hups the most cilllleult ono connected with the problem of an otllclent regula tion of Immigration. To .provido In spection stations along our extended uorthorn frontier would Involve a very largo annual oxpontHturo , and yet It Is perhaps the only safe precau tion. It is possible that the Canadian government might bo in duced to tigroo to eonio plan for our protection against the Invasion of paupers and criminals from Its terri tory , but wo could never snfoly lonvo the carrying out of such an agreement wholly to Canadian oftlclftls. Wo shall bo Btifo from bonlor immigration only when wo Imvo inspection ofllcors at all points where persons are likely to cross from Canada into the United States. The Canadian government does not exhibit a friendly sp'.rit toward this country In allowing Chinese and others oxoluded by our lawa to freely pass through Us territory and onlor the territory of the United States. As a neighbor country It ought at least to show a disposition to respect our laws to tlio extent of refusing to allow its territory to be made the gateway for the passage Into the United States of classes of parsons whom our laws say shall not bo admitted into the country. Wo cannot , perhaps , properly lind fault with Canada for allowing the Chinese to come into that country , but wo havo" just cnuso ot complaint that she Interposes no obstacle to their going from hnr territory Into the United States , and the case with regard to Eu ropean paupers and criminals is still moro serious. ThU dilllculty in the way of a thorough rotrulatlon of immi gration will have lo bo met. and the only safe way to deal with It appears lo bo in establish ing inspection stations along the frontier. lT/1,17' SIIAI.I. TIIK ISXUK JIK'.1 If tlio domocrnts in congress heed the counsel of such loaders as Senator Carlisle they will give secondary con sideration to the silver question and keep the tarill to the front. In his letter - tor endorsing Mr. Mills as in every way qualified to bo speaker of the house , tlio Kentucky senator declares it to bo the first duty of tlio democratic party to change the tariff laws , and ho says that "whoever proposes to postpone the performance of this duty in order to inaugurate a war among our selves ever the silver question , or any other question , is not a wise counselor , and would not inalco a safe loader. " Mr. Carlisle at this time represents the view of a minority of his party , there being no doubt that the majority buliovo , with Senator Pugh , that the issue of the free and unlimited coinage of silver is quite ns important and valuable to the party as that of tariff reform. But the minor ity , which includes Mr. Cleveland , is strongly inlluontial , and It will not be surprising if it shall succeed in having its view of party policy adopted. In any event , however , a bitter light seems assured , the oll'oct of which must inevi tably bo to create a great deal of disaf fection in the party. Tlio at tempt of the free trade element , represented by Mr. Mills , to crowd out the consorvr.tivo tariff reformers is boin r hotly combated , with abundant evidence of a growing feeling of sharply defined hostility between the forces. The leaders have reached the point of publicly criticising each other , and the exchange of recriminations may bo ex pected to grow in volume and force us tlio day of actual battle draws nearer. It is a situation that clearly threatens to mako. a breach in the democratic party wich it will bo extremely diflloult , if not impossible , to close before tlio next presidential election. Assuming that the free trade element will define the policy of the party , what will it do with the tariff ? Mr. Mills and his followers are in faor of restoring duties on sugar , .ind to provide for revenue cost by cutting oil other duties the Texas cnndidnto for the speak- orship advocates an income tax. If elected flpotvkor ho will un doubtedly constitute the ways und means committee with reference to a complete revision of th& tariff as nearly as practicable on free trade linos. The attempt to enact legislation of this kind would of course bo futile , but any thing short of it would not bo consistent with the election of Mr. Mills to the spenkoruhip. The sugges tion that the democrats in the Fifty-second congress should not at tempt to pass a general tariff bill , but content themselves with pro posing certain changes In the existing law , will not bo regarded if thn free trade element secure control of the liouso. They will bo satisfied with noth ing short of a sweeping attack on the tariff , bncauso only in that way can they justify their demand for reform. But of the two issues in debute , the tariff and the free coinage of silver , whiohovor ono the democrats decide to adopt it is evident that moro or loss disaffection in the party will bo inovit- iblo. The Immediate ftiiuro of the democracy is certain to bo full of- trouble and anxiety , and the contention of the warring elements can bo rognrdod > y republicans with the utmost com placency. SENATOR CAUMSLK has a good opin- on of Roger Q. Mills and endorses him 'or speaker of the house of representa tives. Congressman McMillan of the senator's own state hns baon logking with some interest toward this position of honor and Mr. Carlisle's remarkable otter in probably intended as notice to the aspiring Kentuckian that the hibt lomocrntie speaker desires to discour- igo Kentucky ambitions looking in that direction. Should Colonel McMillan or some other loader win the race after all , senator Carlisle will probably wish ho ind attended entirely lo his own'busi- less in his own end of the capital. ALCOHOLISM is as deadly at Point Barrow ns anywhere else ou earth , and Mrrlod off a native chief there recently. L'ho report of the superintendent .of ho refuge station does not Inform us low the liquor got to the old nmn , but irobnbly in the usual way some white nan gafo it to him in exchange for something of value. From nil accounts bore seems to be a call for a ICooley In- Fttltuto In that section , which Is about ho only field left unoccupied by this unomy of the cup that intoxicates. WOUK has been resumed on tlio ujilon lepot , but the workmen will do nothing nero than cover the exposed walls to irotcot thorn from the effects of the voathor. AliKUUKHN , South Dakota , la , after a ugar factory and has sent a delegation o Norfolk to negotiate with thoOxnnrd company to secure It , Moauwhllo Onmltn la leisurely looking on apparently ontly IndifTdronbito the faot that tin sugar boot Indttsl'ry ' will In twonty-flv < yoara bo the fjrputcat resource of till Boctlon of the union , and great contra factories and ' 'VWinorlcs will bo cstah llshod In seine lonWprlslng city wlthli fifty miles of Omaha. AN election jiutgo calls attention U the fact that , thq registrars were al lowed f > 0 cents am hour for their service ? nnd Insists IhMUho election officers should bo equally-well paid , thus giving such a.s worked thirty-six hours $18 each , The judge's polnHs not well taken. Thf election ofllcors are by law allowed but $0 for tholr services and no moro. Thc.v are paid by the job and not by the day or hour. The registrars are rotnunoratctl under the law upon a different basis. The election olllcers may nnvo earned more than ? it each , but in view of the Importance of a prompt canvass of the votes it would bo impolitic to osUbllsh ti precedent which might bo abused b election officers in the future , who would unnecessarily prolong the count for the sake of the wages they would receive. TIIK Sinead system of heating and ventilating school buildings may or may not bo satisfactory. There are wall in formed persons who object to hot air furnneos under any and all circum stances and there are others who have no faith in dry closets. The Kollom building will , however , afford a good last of the merits of the system and it is not necessary to make the experiment in any other building. The Hitchcock school Isa wooden bitildingof four rooms , only two of which are needed at pres ent. To the avorngo taxpayer the idea of expending $ lUui ) for a heating plain to accommodate two rooms now and but four rooms next year savors of roc.closs extravagance. TIIK people will hope that no loop hole of escape from the now law govern ing the deposit of public funds and col lection of interest thereon for the benefit of the city shall bo discovered. It is a wholesome law , and the effect should bo to make it effective rat her than to annul it. The slated salary of tlio city treas urer under the now law is $0,000 per annum , which is ample compensation. If the law is technically inoperative , it will bo a decidedly graceful thing for the city trousuror-olcct to make his own arrangement with the banks just as ho would under the old law , and give the city the interest received on deposits. TIIK Real Estiite Owners association should not bo satisfied with exposing ex travagance , or corruption in any branch of the municipal or county government. ' It should" push its investigations to the point where oxf.raVnganco shall bo re strained and corruption punished. TIIK boodle investigation is closed for the present. Although no ono can fore tell what report , the special committee will make , it is very clear to the reader that a grand jury might use the stories told before the committee as clues to a series of very interesting facts. TIIK cases ngnlnst the suburban sa loon keepers for violation of the license law are dragging their slow length along in a justice court. Meanwhile the county is losing license foes at the rate of not less than Sfl .OOO per annum. TIIK judges and clerks of election who propose to demand SIS for $0 worth of work are wasting lime. The people can not afford to have the precedent estab lished. CHHISTI AN SPKCIIT managed to estab lish a pretty good name before the in vestigating committee in spite of hercu lean efforts to give him a bad repu tation. K.vceptioii Well Taken. ( llnbeIJemncrn' . McKlnloy's plurality 21,1m Is the largest secured by n gubernatorial candidate in Ohio since 1SSI except in 1SS7. The major hns good reason to DO proud of his triumph. The Mulndy IH Chronic. Cntctnniiti Cninmsrclil , For a man committed to the one-term Idea , Mr. Cleveland is making quite an active campaign for n third nomination. But , of course , wo must take into consideration the fact that n third nomination does uot mean another term. Convenient Cor IJribu-Tiikors. AII .VU C'ffi ; .Stir. The constitution of California makes It convenient for hrlho-tnkers. It provides that In eases of legislative bribery the person bribed must answer , but that what ho reveals - voals shall not bo usad against Mini. The purchased creature may "give away" his purchaser and go free himself. I.'rcotls Uooil | MI and Horses. Limwvtt'e Tiinfx. When General John M. Palmer takes his seat in the federal senate two weeks from today ho will ho the tenth man born in ICou- Lucky to hold the commission of Illinois in the United States sonato. Though a very small state cumpardd with Now York nnd Pennsylvania , it Is probahlo that Kentucky iaa turned out ns many senators as both .hoso states together. Food lor tlio Gaining. t'/ifcarj.y / . Tiitcr-inxtn. Calamity croakerimuy llnd a grain of com- 'ort In the fact noted dy Dopaw In his spaooh it the Chamber of'Gbmmorco banquet , that .his country is llltc.iy , to suffer from a vor/ lerious famine ilurlu/i / thu coining winter aud iprmg n famine oari : nud locomotives to rausport our enormous surplus products to ; iio markets of tho'\vorld \ to food the millions luncorlui ; to rocujj-l thorn. It's u dreadful iltuatlou. , , . , An Apt Simile. Mliine'aMiK Time * . The position of ttio republican parly in : owa on the pronlUHIon buslncm recalls very 'orcluly ' the story pij ho two boys who were mnting nnd c.imu aonm u wild bcvir. Ono if them climbed n tree , but the uthor wn-i inablo to reach this haven of safety nuu the war , linking n lunge at him , slid between ils legs. The bociuhlhlm by both oirs : uid , after holding on for homo tlino , shouted nit to thu bay in the troa : ' 'John , conu lore. " "What forl" queried the other. "I vautyou to help mo let ' this hoi ; go. " The opublioans of Iowa uro'tlrod of riding pro- ilbltlon , hilt they daren't lot go. I OOP New York Moili-Ht Clilu ii ; < > . C/ifni/i J/riM. If Now Yjrlc hadn't boon so flamboyant ibout It thu humiliation wouldn't h ivo buon o great , But to go down to Washington vlth Plntt , UUcocK , t\u80tt und Colonel ihepard , to p.ir.ido the strjets In uniform aid In atop to the hlaroof bunds , to claim the oorth from Genesis to Hovolatlon , and t coino out nt the end with three rote * ! It I sntd that llttlo Omaha stopped crying ti laugh nt the spectacle. How especially alronR nnd dignified was the modest nttltudi of Chicago by contrnstl And to bo bonlon by Minneapolis ! Poor , nntlqunlcd No York , how many iLnes moro must you b < knocked out before you can understand thai you nro no longer In Iti IWHIllXU IT.V. . Chicago Times. it Is a strangely sugeos tlvo coincidence that the Omaha nud Mlntio npolls boomoM nnd a c.vclono should have struck Washington the same day. Platlsmotilh Journal : The national ropub llcans nro not uwnro of the vast quantity ol solMovn there Is bound tip in the average Omnhog , or Ihoy never would have humil iated him In that manner. Fremont Trlbuiio : Colonel Scott , ol Onmlni , who presented that city's chums for the national convention before the ropub. llcim committee showed bad taste In scold ing some of the other competitors. Denver Suns Tno selection of tha young metropolis of the northwest is tno most nc- coplable to the republicans of Colorado of any that could linvo boon made niter Omaha. It Is a recognition of the now west. 1'lnttsmoulh Herald : While Omaha was unsuccessful In potting the republican na tional convention , sot for Tuesday , Juno 7 , ISW , nt Minneapolis , Minn. , she ls > willing to recognize the fact that the choice was well mado. Columbus Telegram : Minneapolis was the place selected for holding the republican na tional convention in 1SD2. Omaha might have secured It if she had gone about it properly , out sno didn't. She tried force to secure it , and that was fatal. Molasses catches more files than vinegar. Minneapolis Journal : Omaha was very weak from start to finish. Judge Scott was aware of this nnd that Is the reason ho spent the time abusing Iho other cities. Omaha may bo a gateway ; hut that is all. A gateway without business may as well bo "a lodge In some vast wilderness. " Chicago Tribune : Lot fall a scalding tear or twol It Is a thousand pities , But Now York , Chattanooga , Sun Francisco , Detroit , Pittsburg , St. Louis. Omaha , Cincinnati , I'lunketvllle , Franklin Fur- mice , Hnvcrhlll , Oluoy , Eillsvillo , Haek- ett's Mills , I'ccatomcn and Ynzoo Are not con vontlon cities. ISovv ork Herald : Sinytho Idropncd a cent In front of a blind bo.sar today to aoo 1C ho'd pick It mi. Tompldns Well , did ho ? Hmvtlie No ; liu siild. " .Mako It a dollar , boss. and I'll forget myself. " 'J lines. "A llttlo nonsense now and then Is relished by the best of muni" lly this old Raw uxcusu Is madit 1'or editorials on "thu biilancu of trade. " I/lfo : Juduo Ono year , and $ .T ) due. Prisoner's law.vor-I would like to miiko n motion to have that siintc'iicu reversed , Judge All rlchu l-'lfty yours , and $1 line. Washington Star : "Did yoz go to see the doc'htur , DonnyV" "Yes , iniitliur. " " 1'hwat did lie say ? " "Ilo asked mo wus Ol cured an' I told him the troot. which win 'no. ' " "Oh , bosorrali. It's no ambition yez Imvo tollln' Mm 'no , ' uud trow n' away u eluinco to pltyor picture In the papers. " Etiqonu Field duclarus that when James Whltuomb Itlloy cave some ronillngs on ship board , wlillo returnlni ; from Kurouo a fuw weeks nno , ho had two enthusiastic Scots union ; : his auditors. "Is It no womlerfn' , Iionnl' . " remarked one of them , "tlmt a tradesman siilil ho slo a lioiuilo pool ? " "And Is ho Indeed a tradesman ? " asked the other. " 'Deed Is lie , " answered tlio llrjr , speaker. "Hid. ye no hoar the dominie Intryjiicn him as thn honslur-poet ? Just thliiK of It men Just think o'sle a irudu pout dividing his time at milking hooidery ! " New York Weekly : Oomliictoi Wo linvo missed tno connection and yon will have to wait : i t this station MIX hours. Old Lady 'who Is a lltllu nervous on the railroad ) Well , I'm safe for six hours auy- wuy. PUB IIOKS TIIK TALK I NO. lie "poured his soul Into her oar" i-he trumlillir listened to his vow In silence. They were wed last year "fls she who does the talklu ; no w. "I love you , dear , with fervor wild My love your llfo will o'er endow So rli lily 'twill ho summer mild" 'Tib she who docs the talking now. "Mv love will open ways through thorns , Will jiather blooms from orniiiio bmiL'li. And pluclc eaoh flower that tru-tli adorns" "Pis she who does tlio talkln , ' now. "Why notstiy nil nl ht at the club ? Your tlmo is snunt ah ! who knows how ? Your leaves urn there I uctlho stub" Alt , yes ! she docs the talking now. Ilroolilyn I/fo : ' 'Kobort , dear , how do you supuoso those dozens and ( lo/.cni of empty bottles over uot Into thu eulltir ? " "Why , I don't know , my dear. I never bought an empty bottle In my life , " Now York Herald : KICKS Did Hover strllcu you that It took Joblots a loir. ; time to tumble to anything ? DIJSJ.S I guess , yes ; ho wouldn't tumble if he stopped on u hanana : ikln. Iiidlananolls Journal : "It Is your bet. " "All rUlit I bet a bean. " said thu man ad- dressod. throwing n "chip" to the middle of the table , The Boston man lookud at him sadly for u moment , "You should not bo profanu , " said he. Washington Stir : 'That's the meanest burlier I e\ur hoard of , " said the man with a tender face , "Why ? " "He actually oxpocls his customers to bring there own sticking plaster wHh them. " Union County Standard : A hermit and a tramp present about thusamoKuiinr.il appoar- iiiico : ttio dlst'ii'jiilshlng ' ' feature Is that one Is a recluse , the other u wiuok loose. Illnghumton Loader : A New Haven man Ims worn thu xiiinu coat for llftv-tlvo vo.trs. Hut then he lives In the laud of xtuady habits , Itoohester I'ost : In the iilisnncu of pugilistic matches of note the footballlsts are doing all they can to kick up a row , Ita'tlmoro American : "I must bo bravo nnd take chances , " as the man s.ild when no went Into thu fair room. 'VIIRSTMTTS , 1 DKUh.inK ! " Julin C. .Sie ? i tn Hiiffain news. The thoughtless voiith who vents a sneer At soiiu'thlnz he.ml before , And terms , pnrhaps thu teller queer. And deems him quite , i born , Will oft be seen whom Jokes are made , Or rotmrtt'O N fair. To sharpen his Damascus bliulo With Chestnuts. 1 declare ! " Die story-wit of uses past , Told In all tongues nirl ullmcs , i\ro ( lowers oil tlio waters east- Are miislu of thu ohlmes , riiey'vu floated down the stream of Urn * biilitlulnu tfrlctf and euro i\n.l mi one thought the wit or rhyme Were "Oliestnut'i , I declare ! " Dm snn ; . " . the exiles sun a of old Aru sunIn hearts of men : Yes , horu and now thu story's told In vigor stroiia as then. 1'liQ tiomhlii | ohoids of harps that hung Upon the willows there \ruHtlll vlbrallnuaiid they llniij .No "t.'lii'stnuts , I declare ! " rhu grand old plays of Shako.spoaro are Thu glory of this it e. riiey'ru hu lit cm stories told afar On munv an unlent puue ; riiosotusof Scotland , HIIIIK by Hums , In matchless verso and air , \ ro euhiies that a poet luarns . I''rum "liliostifula. I declare ! \ml children's slorlos , children's play , That charmed from sun to nun : Phe wlshlnf ot " ( Inoil nlijht ! " "liood day I" Ah , when were thesu houun ? I'liu In lahy thusoiigof dlcup ; The kiss , thu evening prayer ; I'lio tours tint Invln : mothers weep- No ' L'hestniits. I duclaru ! " Vml dour old Santa ( 'Inns , and all Thu ucn'roiis lfls hu brill' ' * ; Its hui'rylna footsteps In thu hall ] Thu htoukluuson the Hlilir.-s ! ilnst thuso retire , subdued In doubt , Amid thu UhrUtmus glare , IcuuiihO , forsooth , the youth just out frlos , Ghotftniits , 1 doelarol" OIL INSPECTION MADE BASH Peculiar Methods Which Obtain in Enfon Ing Notraska's ' Providential Statute. NO TROUBLE TO BRAND THE BARRELS Stonolls I.oft At the AVnroliotiHPH- Ktnpiy HarrrilH Hcllllod Whnt North Ilcnit , Nolirnskn City , Lincoln , Ilcntrlco niut Superior Show. I'ursulnRhls tnvcstlRotlon TIIE nun mai found Unit 11 vrns a common occurrence fo tlio Consolidated Tnnk Line company nt Frc mont to ship to retail dealers small Iroi tanks of the kind mentioned In this pnpo yostorday.contalnluH about IHty Rations of oil These tanks \vero traced on the cars and prl vato wagons to Fontauello , Serlbner am other places , but In no Instance was tticr anything to show thai the oil they contalnci had ever been Inspected , This nbsouc of proof of Inspection had bcei noted by some of the moro obsorvnn mcrchant.i , but was passed by without In qutry. When , howovcr , tholr nttcntiou wa tiartlculnrly dlrcctnd to tlio innttor by Tin Hir. : reporter , tlioy made UD their minds ti handle no moro tanks which did not beui proof of Inspection and , wherever It was pos slblo , to receive the oil only lit wooden bar rels. Many of them doubted that 11 barrel oven with a brand of approval , would insure to thorn better oil , but they thought 11 wouid protect thorn as against their custom' ors , North Ili-iid'H ICxpcrloinM ; . The reporter then \vont to North Bend , whence It was alleged the two Iron tanks llrst referred to had been returned. A can vass of the groceries In the thriving town was made. Several of the dealers admitted that they had been using tlio Illegal tanks , but said that they would do so no moro. They also severely criticized the tank company for the unwarranted deception which It bad practiced upon them. "If I had thought a tnotnont , " said one of the dealers , "that ono of these llttlo tunics took the place of a barrel , 1 would Immedi ately Imvo noticed tnat It was not inspected. LJut the fact of the matter is that the ma jority of us do not sell our ell out of tbo bar rels wo receive it in.Vo generally pump it into llxcd tanks of our own , to do nwny with loakngo. Wo have nothing to "show , however , that the oil has boon oven nominally inspected except the empty barrel which wo sometimes let lie In the back yard. I am convinced that wo have been doing things loosely , but then you know wo could full back on the tank line if any thing occurred. " At the time of Tun UIK : man's visit all tlio North Bond merchants wore selling the oil which hud a.snort tirno before reached them by carload from Omaha. Tlio last of thorn to dispense with his uninspected tank was C. S. .1. Leo , or rather the manager of the store which formerly belonged to that gentleman , the stock recently , because of unfortunate circumstances , having temporarily arily fallen into the hands of creditors. Those tanks had been sent out of the store the night nreceding the reporter's visit nnd were found by the latter on the depot plat form awaiting shipment by freight to tYo- moiit. Those tanks wore numbered 093 r-nd ? ; ! U , and were of ttm gonorul description us has already boon referred to In these columns. Hi-aily-Iirnnilod linrrcls. TUB Bun man next Jumped to Nebraska City. The Consolidated Tank Line company has at tliis point several largo tanks and a fair si/.od warehouse. When the reporter entered the latter ho asked the manager : "Do you know Mr. Allen , who travels for jii ( nnother oil firm ) . "No , but I know you , " was tbo response. It appeared for a moment as if somebody had apprised'tho superintendent of ttio object of the visit , but the watchfulness of tbo tank man disappeared and ho himself continued his worlc , which was that of filling with oil bar rels which already bore tbo stamp of approval of K. C. ( Jams , chief inspector , nnd C. II , Uk'kards , deputy inspector. The inspector specter wu ? not about tbo place , and could not. have known the Kind of oit which was In- tundod for the barrels , because the superin tendent , for a moment , loft tlio warehouse , went to the yard mid opened a valve on one Of the largo tanks which ono the reporter could not determine. . The warehouse man then returned and. in the presence of tlio scriue , filled the two bar rels which had already been approved ny the inspector. A line of similar empty barrels lay upon thu floor , and ono bv ono they were rolled up and llllcd. It was a parallel case to that recorded yes terday , as occurring at the Piij warehouse In Omatia where Deputy Inspector nlcDonald had branded uud approved about forty empty barrels before they had boon touched with a drop of oil. During the temporary occupation of the superintendent , the reporter noticed the brands of several Inspectors on some of the tanlts in the yard. This was the first Instance In which such brands had bepu noticed on any of the tanks visited. ilo also noted a variety of idle stencils ly ing upon the end of one of the Imrruls. Ono of thooo was a company brand , another tin alleged government ganger's , a third could not bo idontlllod , and a lourth was the ap proval brand of O. 11. I'nlllips , deputy in spector. Information . Is not now available as to what right the present chief inspector ur his deputy has in allowing any such brand to remain about the warehouse. It could serve no legitimate purpose , even If thu deputy were still among the inspectors iitul a part o'f it could bo used to advantage by an unscrupulous superintendent. Automatic Oil liiHpoutlnn. Tin : BII : : man next wont to Lincoln , and for part of two day * awaited the return of Joseph Carns , the "deputy inspector , who makes his hoadiiuartors ut that point. The L'Willomun , howuvcr , was away in Fremont , It was .said , and during his ubioneo the peo- [ > lu at the Consolidated Tank Line warehouse , us also the ofllcu of the chief Inspector it Lincoln were loft to take cnro of thnin- julve.s. There was nobody around , however , Lo inspect the oil which the Tank people aunt 3Ut during that tune. In Beatrice the reporter introduced hlm- self to Mr. Buchlor , tlio manager of the Tunic Line company warehouse as a party desirous jf Knowing whether anybody had sought to liuy the right to soil oil by wagon-tank in Llmt city. Mr. Ituehler said there had not. Ono man jut recently had rmlrod from tha bmlnoss , ind the former gnossod ho could supply alt : no oil people of Beatrlco. "Aim I so u vou In Omaha ? " asked Mr. ruiohlor , sharply ovelug the roporlur. "I am indlroiitly from Omalia , " was the ro ily , "lluvou't you any tanks horoi" timidly iskcd the scrlbo. Mr , Buohlor did not answer. It was not lurformiiiga labor of lovo. It was now dusk uid chilly and the gentleman was evidently mxlous to get homo. Ho led the way , how- ivor , to three largo , red Iron tanks which voro undercover. They were all nearly full ind had been branded , but they had scon no irand slnco that which had buon placed upon hem by O. II. Phillips. And yotiVr. Buohlor had In ttio tnoantlmo icon onercotically drawing from them for ho supply of his Beatrice customers. lit thu storehouse ) proper were u number of larrots , but these had been shipped from Lincoln nnd bore tha npprornl of Dormtv Carni. Thc.io barrels nro smit to towns In the neighborhood on order from iho uiam homo In Omaha. Ilium Under nt Allan , The reporter ronched Superior on Sunday. Half n mlle from the depot ho found "R v. Bishop's oil htnuo. " Ho found the superin tendent working Ilka n boavor. Ho Inquired as to the location of n nupuoiltloua oil firm nnd the oil man replied. ' 1 know nearly all the oil dealers In the South I'lalto countrv , nnd I don't luiow of such a houjo. " "Has the Tank Line n warehouse out this way I" "Well , this plnco Is In Bishop's name , but it belongs to the Consolidated Tank Line company. " The wnrohoiuo wo * a llttlo ono , po'lmps in xlC > foot. It had two stories. The upper of these was on n level with a railroad platform In front nnd the lower was on n piano with n road nt which oil could bo sent out to the city. On the top Moor there were about a dozen barrels of oil. All of these bore the brand of Deputy Inspector McDonald of Omaha , Thorn w'cro novoral empty barrels from which this brand had not been effaced. On the floor below wcru three laura sheet- Iron tanks. These wcro visible through an ononlng In the upper lloor , made appar ently by raising a couple of the planks. The warohouco man rolled n llllcd barrel toward the tloor opening , In serted n faucet at nno end and then laid the barrel on Its side , l-roni one of the tanks bnnuath n rutibur hose led through the opening. This the man attached to the faucet In the barrel. Ilo then bored n hole through the utitm nnd the oil rapidly loft the barrel and llowod into the tank. In tnls manner a number of the bar rels were emptied. This was deliberately doing away with an alleged approved package - ago and putting the oil Into a tunic In order to facilitate its handling , heedless as to whether or not the people would demand | > rcutf of Its safety. If such a demand had been made it could lot have been satisfied. Those tanks had hml other oils in them and the mixture certainly was not that which had nominally received the approbation of the deputy Inspector In this city. As such , It was n violation of the law to sell , even as It was of purchasers to consume It before they know that it bad boon lagally Inspected. But the Tank Line does not seem to care about the law , nnd there is expressed sur prise that they respect It at nil in view of tha Vouches nnu four" which the Inspectors al low them to drlvo through it. A/ill ItOUlfN .IXIt 1'JHtlttltJO IL8. "Conduct us u Kino Art" contains really two books which , whllci written with no reference to each other , seem to bo , In both manner and nnUtor , each the complement of the other. Ono Is entitled "Tho Laws of Daily Conduct , " by Nicholas I'atno Gil man , nnd the other ' 'Character Building , " by Kd - ward 1'ayson .lackson. This is n most suitable - able work for young people. In Us pages may bo found sound , sensible udvtco on such matters us the young urosomucn in need of , and thn style is so nttractlvo that nn in telligent young man or woman will bo Insens ibly led to finish the work after commencing to read it , nnd tlio benefits to bo derived from Its perusal ate wholly incalculable. Published by Houghton , Mifllin & Co. , Boston - ton , Mass. In the Introduction to her excellent work entitled , "A Chicago Blblo Class , " Ursula N. Costefeld , says : "Tho question today is not 'What churcii you belong toi' but 'Whoro it your level In the thought world ! ' And because - cause mind , not creed 'is the measure of the man , ' so the true teacher of or minister unto the people Is ho who offers them the fruits of that" world In which ho dwells , In- Htcud of handing on the 'traditions of the elders. " " This book is to bo valued for thn practical Christianity which It teaches and also for thn able manner in which the writer has handled the important subjects touched upon. Published by tbo United States Book company , Now York. " "How"to Co-operate : A Manual for Co operators , " by Herbert Moyriek , dostribcs the how rather ttiun the wherefore of cooperation - operation thai is , how to manugo a > o- operative store , farm or factory , cop.ira . Ivo dairying , banking , llru insurance and "farmer * and women's exchanges for both buying ni d soiling. The book Is a revelation as to the extent nnd succeas of co-operative work. Published by the Orange .ludd cou.niny , fi'J aud .11 Lafayette place. Now York. "Vagor , or Vicissitudes of a Vagabond , " edited by Joseph McVlttiu and published by A. M. Kddy , Albion , N. \ . , is certainly n verv unlnuo boolt. Us contents comprise de scriptions ot European tr.iviil interspersed with incidents nnd anecdotes. The author. Mr. McViltle , was for some time a reside t of this city and the little publication will doubtless prove of especial interest to the many friends and acquaintances ho imuio wliile hero. Mr. S. H. M. B.VOH has given to the world a very pretty collection of poems under the caption of "Tho Happy Isles , and Other Pooms. " Published by Charles L. Webster & Co. , Now York. Much sensible ) advice and valuable Information mation for the yoiintj will bo found in the pages of a little volume entitled , "JSthics for Young People , " by C. C. Kvorott. Published by Uinn & Co. , Boston , Muss. "European Isolations" is a very charming Tyrolese sketch by Tulmago Dalin and pub lished by Ctissell Publishing company. Lovers of Ittoi-.ituro of tbo French school will lindTlio Bachelor of Salamanca , " translated from thu French of A. K. LoSai'o by .lumt'3 Townsumi , with live photogravures ultor It. Do Los Hlos , something that will prove Just what they want. Published by Worthington & Co. , Now York , A work that will provo of special Interest to tourists and those whoso business or inclination causes them to do much traveling is "The Business of Travel , n Fifty Years' Itecord of Progress , " by W. Frusor Kao. Published by Thomas Cook aud Son , Mi-Mi Broadway , Now York. In Current Literature for December will bo found an audacious and striking article from the National Observer ( Knglund ) entitled , "A Pica for Inconstancy. " The ivadlngs from recent books nro : "My Friend Vespu , " from Stockton's "Ttio House of Martha ; ' ' "Doming the Sanctuary , " from Crawford's "Tho Witch of Prague ; " nnd "Tho Chris tian's Kiss , " from Franco's "Judith Wach- tonborg. " Among the sociological articles "Abortive Men , " "A Man's ' Woman , " nnd "Social Insurgents" are notable for strength and timeliness. The famous chipiur for the month U "Tho Chariot itaco , " trom "llun- Hur. " A weird , fantastic story Is "Tho Witch of Prague. " by F. Marion Crawford , but thu reader who once starts reading it will feel HO fascinated that ho will lie compelled to llnliih It. Published by Macmlllun & Co. , New York. Short Stories for December contains char- icterlstiu tales from Kipling , Sidiiov Luska , ind J. M. Barrio , besides clover work from Ltm French , Spinisli and Italian. Tlio Tumous .s'.ory for the month Is the Scotch nasterpicco "Wandering Nvilllo'.s Tule , " by Sir Walter Scott , The current Lltornturo I'ubllsblng company , : ! 0 West Twenty-third itruot , Mow York. "Tho Five Hundred Dollar Checu , " by ilorutlo Alger , Jr. , Is a thrilling story o'f rimoand udvouturo which will llnd inmh 'uvnr with lovers of sensntloniil literature. Jnlted Slates Book company , Now York. " /Igzag Journeys in Australia.or A Visit o the Ocean World , " by Ho/ekiah Butler- vorth , describes the wonderiul resource-Hull mtural advantages of the llfth contlnontuml dso gives capital pen pictures of the social clattons of thu people. The worlc Is cnllv- inud by thu startling stories of the gold dis- rovurlosund graphic accounts of thounl- naU peculiar to this fuscluuilng country , 'iibilshcd by Kates & , Laurlat , 1'jii Sumner troot , Boston. Highest of all in Leavening Power. Latest U. S. Govt ! Report.