Nebraska Newspapers

    THE OMAHA 'i SUNDAY BEE.
TWENTIETH YEAR. OMAHA , SUNDAY MORNING , ' JUNE 29 , 1890-TWELVE PAGES. NUMBER 11.
THE LOCAL WORLD OF SPORT ,
A Budget of Refreshing Gossip From the
Diamond.
WHISPERINGS FROM THE V/HEEL. /
the Shooters A Stray Flock
ol" CCCBC Scarcity of IJraln Peed
Arc TnkltiK the Fly MlHcol-
lancoiiH
"Speaking about ball players' ages , " said
Dave Howe to the writer ono evening during
the Denver's recent trip hero , "who would
you say was the oldest player on the diamond
toda/ . "
"You are no spring chicken yourself Dave , "
was the answer , "but of course there are a
score or moro older than you.1. '
"Me , " Intercepted the big first baseman
with considerable acerbity , "In heaven's
name , who do you tuko mo for Methuselah I
How old am II"
"Well David , I saw you play ball about
sixteen years ago , nnd you wcro as big and as
ugly and a good deal better ball player then
than you nro now , and I should judge that
you uro about thirty-eight years of ago. "
"Thirty-debt centuries you might as well
putlt. No sir , I'm only thirty-two , and lam
two years older than my brother Jack of the
Buffulosnnd If you don't bcllovo it we'll send
for the funilly blblo and prove it. And you
never saw mo play ball sixteen years ngo.
You refer to the tlmo I suppose when the
Pcorias played the Cummitisville Blue StockIngs -
Ings nt Cincinnati , when Jack aud I were
loth with the Illinois tcamt"
"Correct. "
"I thought so. Well that was In the fall of
' 88 , so you sco you arc off your biiso exactly
four years. No sir. Sandy , I'll cross my
breast , I won't bo thirty-two until next Sep
tember , " and that bland , child-llko look came
in Dave's face , the look he always wears
when talking with the umpire just before ho
cries "play ball. "
Smooth man. that Dnvo Howe , and n great
general nnd ball player yet , no difference
what they sny.
"But the oldest man In the diamond today ,
that is what you ask , is It Duvol"
"Yes , who do you think Is the muni' '
"Either Jack Nelson of the Atlantic league ,
or Jim White of the Buffalo brotherhood
club. I remember when I was yet a barefoot
boy of gluing my eye to a kiiot-holo In the
fence at the old Forest City park In Cleve
land and watching the Deacon go through
the Highland lllug behind the plate , way
back In ' 70 or ' 71. Jim White , I would say ,
isn't n day under forty-seven , and yet 1 sco
his ngo stated frequently at'forty-.two. "
' Well , 1 think you are wrong. I don't
think Jim Is over forty , mid ho's worth sev
eral years work yet. "
"You make mo weary , Dave ; you ballplay
ers are all alike ; you are as frafd as a school
girl that somebody will find out your correct
age , and you couldn't tell the truth If you'd
try. The Hste of ball-players ages published
in lust week's Now York Sporting Times , so
far as the old veterans are concerned ,
Is simply preposterous , although Editor
Cnylor gives the alleged unto of their births.
The brotherhood is lull of patriarchs pusso
ball players who are now only making a bluff
nt ball playing , nnd It will only require this
ucnsoii to rclcguto them to the shades eternal ,
nave where they will occasionally crop out us
nn umpire. But the oldest active plavcr on
the diamond today Is unquestionably Deacon
Whlto. "
"Woes of the Tall-Kiider.
The tail-end team In n baseball race gener
ally gets it from "soda to hoek.1 ! . If there , is
any ill-luck to bo smeared over any team the
tuil-enders get It. Omaha and St. Paul nro
instances In the present Western association
contest. So far as individual strength is
concerned both of these teams compare fav
orably with the very best In the raco. Onn- '
ha surely Is the equal of any of thorn , either
Individually or collectively , and still she
looses. If rain falls in any city in the circuit
during ttio night before a gnmo in sufficient
quantities to flood the ball grounds , it is
ten to ono that it is in tlio city
where the tnll-endcrs * nro to
play. Of course they always get the worst
of the umpiring. That is as certain as death
or taxes. Ono reason for this is that tlio um
pire is less ufraid of tlio tull-cnd team than ho
is of one well up in the race , and is naturally
inclined toward adherence to the old saw ,
"never kick n man when ho's down , but hit
him with a club. " If the regular umpire falb
to show up It Is Invariably upon the grounds
of the tail-cmlers , under which circumstances
they are compelled by the rules to select un
Mmpiro from the ranks of the visiting club ,
who is scrupulously careful to give them the
worst of it. If u player gets lined for
kicking , It Is always one of the tail-end-
crs. In fact the tail cndcr gets the worst of
everything. Thov lese more gnmcs by a
slnglo run than nil the other teams combined ,
and then If there Is n railroad wreck within a
hundred miles of the city they are to play in
that day , of course they uro in It. Their star
twlrlor Is always sick , nobody goes to see
them play , they forfeit guarantees on no-
count of the inclemency of the weather , have
more hats stolen and meet with more general
cussed misfortune than ought to fall to the
lot of u dozen teams. Surely an awful hoodoo
dee rests forever on the tuil-cudcrs.
The Cause ot'Oiuiilins Defeats.
There's no use talking , the Black Sox can
not bo expected to win with any degree of
regularity until Manager Leonard discon
tinues changing the men about so much ,
The team contains regular men for regular1
positions nud they should bo played there or
not all. There has hardly been two con
secutive games this season with the men In
the same positions , und it is n wonder the
team has done as well as it has. Today It is
Urquuhart in the Held , tomorrow Moran or
Phulcn ; then Cunnvan appeal's on second ,
then back In the Held again ; Urquuhart on
first , then behind the bat ; Willis in the
middle gurden today , and In the box tomor
row , and so it goes. This was Slice's fault In
' 88. The team was played no two days n llko ,
and the consequence was tlio boys won about
every fourth or fifth gamo. The personnel
jjt-tho Omaha team just now is u strong one ,
niufTtlO men should ho played each accord
ing to hU Individual qualifications , Kearns ,
Camwan und Willis should bo kept uninter
ruptedly In the Held , and Uniutilmrt and
Moran required only to do the back-stopping.
Collins Is now In playing form , und there will
bo no occasion for continued experimenting
nt ' ml , and unless sickness or Injury
Intel i > oses It Is pretty snfo to say that the team
will bo played from this on as It ought to bo
played. If the management Is desirous of
cm tailing expenses they should decldo upon
Hlncs or Phulon us their general utility mail
and let the other go , without hesitation or
tiontlmeut. That's the way to run u ball
team.
Now Grounds for Next Season ,
Unquestionably this is the lust season the
gnmo will bo played ut the present park , as
President McCormlck has unalterably mudo
up his mind to secure grounds
within a shorter distance of the
center of the city at any cost. This Is
a wise determination , for were the grounds
located but half the dUtuuco from
the corner of Fifteenth und Furnnm that
they now nro , the attendance would bo
doubled. Such a change would do away with
all danger of fiilluro In taking Iu the gunrun-
f- too at iill biso
weak-day games , iu fact , ball
In Omaha would then bo in enterprise that
would attract the most liberal Investment.
McCormlck has not yet ivllnqulsed all hope
of securing the grounds on Nicholas street ,
between Nineteenth nnd Twentieth slreots ,
just north of the Omaha street railway com-
pany's now rawer houso. The fitting up of
these grounds would require the demolition of
or two , mid entail a vast
deal of expense , but the rovcnuo !
derived by reason of their Increased ,
accessibility would bo of such a
character us would offset nil this nt a very
early day In the season. Big crowds enhance
n ball game , just llko they do a horse race ,
theatrical pcrformanco or any other amuse
ment , and the patrons of the game nro all
anxious to liavd the management succeed In
securing grounds nearer the center of the
city. _
About the Ton in.
Wnlloy Andrews hasn't got his good eye
with him to nuv very considerable extent yet
this season. With men on bases ho cun bo
counted n sure out. This Is tough , but true.
Just wnlt , however , ho will get his optics on
the ball before long , nnd then the fences will
quiver.
Have you noticed what nil elegant bunt big
Mike Hfncs makes I Ho gets it down well ,
about half way between homo and third , close
along the line , and has but llttlo dlfllculty in
beating the ball to first. A bunted ball Is
really and truly the only sacrifice hit there is.
Pralso from Cnsar Is pralso indeed. An-
son says that "Omaha Is a regular factory for
shortstops. Last fall I pulled Jimmy Coonoy ,
the greatest of them all , with perhaps the ex
ception of Herman Long nnd Jack Gloss-
cock , from out their ranks , but they are mak
ing another out there this year In Joe Walsh ,
He's a treasure. "
Tom Kcarns , whllo ho ranks head and
shoulders above anv outfielder in the West
ern association , Is a sure hitter with men on
the bags , and ho never smashes her for much
less than a thrco-suckcr. Kearns is the Ufa
Of the team.
Dad Clarke 1ms not been In real prlmo con
dition yet this season , but ho Is working hard
to get there. Probably Dad's ' misfortune can
be accounted for by the fact that ho met a
wagon load of empty barrels on his way to
tlio opanlng championship game nt Denver
this springnnd yet the Onrahm lost. Clarke ,
you know , rates a load of empty barrels go od
fora win under any circumiUiiiccs , and to
pass a funeral menus defeat.
Cnnavan U growing bigger and bigger
every day , and will sooa bo a real man. And
then Jimmy is putting up n better game , too ,
it seems , with every additional day. Hois
almost dead sure to rap out a sufo hit when
he steps to tlio bat In the opening inning.
Everybody likes to see Tit Willis on the
bases. He's full of ginger nil the tlmo and
never gets glued to the bags. Tit's third
base steals are great.
Cleveland has been playing In rotten luck
all during the spring months , but ho is get
ting down to form now and will soon bo glor
ified as grcatlv as ho has been execrated. So
far as ability Is concerned , when In condition ,
ho has It with any player on the team. Mora
miraculous pickups or swifter , moro accur
ate throws than some of Ills , wcro never seen
on the diamond.
Billy Moran nnd Cornelius Urqunhart .nro
two of your right-minded young ; players.
They are hard students and promising play-
era , ; mil Intend to allow no opportunity to pass
that otters a chance of improvement. Neither
man has any bad habits and both keep good
hours. They are model ball players.
Pitcher Al'irtiii is the Sphinx of the team.
He has only spoken once or twice since ho
joined the Oiimhas , and some of the gang
say ho can hold his breath an hour.
Enough of Kittle and Colliu's piny has
not been seen yet to justify any comment.
The OmihVfl : Weekly Sioat. !
The Omaha gun club's weekly shoot , which
was held on the Dunmlro grounds across the
riverycstcrdaynfteriioon , ro3ultc.Iai follows :
Kennedy . tltlt lllll ilttt 00100 OMin-IS
c.win . moio moo 11111 icui loju-m
i'o ? , ' . loon ooiit iiitt inn nuio-iu
iiiiuhcs . unit Dim line unit noio-iu
lledford . lllll lllll mil lllll OUrjO 21
Townsund . ( Milt Ollia lllll 11111 OJtll 1 ! )
Hunter . OOJIl 100J1 KlIDt (11110 ( 11111-1. )
firuvcs . OOC01 01000 nut 03111 lllll 1. .
llnrgrave . lllll 00111 11010 1011)1 ) OJ111-17
The conditions wcro 23 standard targets , IS
yards rise , 5 unlniown traps.
Soldier Reading , the bykcr , has located In
St. Joseph.
Chester U. Olmstoad , ono of Chicago's 'best
riders , will summer in Omaha.
C. C. Candy of Boston is hero assisting
Perrlgo in booming the Victor.
Stillmnn G. Whlttaker has returned from
England. While in Europe ho made u mile
ln : > :2G. :
Young Schtll , of this city , beat Charlie
Ashingcr , the Oklahoma farmer , in a llfty-
milc race down at St. Joe lust week.
Belt has returned nnd is nt wsrk again.
The semi-weekly runs byPcrrigo's three-man
team will now bo resumed it is presumed.
The weather is getting a trifle too incinera
ting for long weekly club runs and the
Apollos will discontinue theirs until after
dog days.
Captain Emerson has issued a very neat
card with the runs called for July , which ob
viates all excuse on the score of ignorance of
tlmo or plnco.
The Omaha clubs could occasion considera
ble agitation by a grand road raeo. All of the
prominent clubs In the country are holding
them this season.
This afternoon the run will bo made to
Lake Munuwn , where the boys will fish and
disport themselves In the limpid waters , or
limpid mud , to their hearts content.
Several members of the local wheel clubs
will probably attend the national meet of the
League of American Wheelmen , which will
bo held at Niagara Falls in August.
The lawn'party given by the Oiunha wheel
club lust Wednesday evening was a flattering
success , thanks to the untiring efforts of the
committee , Messrs. Head , Morris and Day.
The wheel club's llrst summer fcto last
Wednesday evening was a charming affair.
The grounds wore ornate with Chinese
lanterns , the musio by the Mandolin club delicious -
licious nnd the refreshments ditto ;
The first annual club race of the Apollos
will take place today over thoOmaiia-Councll
Bluffs courso. The prize is a handsome gold
medal offered by W. Bohl of the Acme Iron
und wire works.
Jack Prince and Lily Williams compete in
a twenty-llvo mlle race at St. Joseph this
afternoon , Prlnco to give the Lily a handicap
of a mlle mid a half. Of course they will
both break the record.
On the Missouri Valley road the train leaves
nt n p. m. and 8 a. m. on the Fourth , and on
the Union Pacific at 0:15 a. m. on the lid. All
riders taking wheels by rail should remove
the pedals ut the dopot.
The punch bowl , embedded In a mammoth
cake of Ice , and embowered in smlhix and
Mujcsto roses , was not the least pleasing feature -
turo of the banquet hall , Tha club is getting
very swagger , und thesu evening fctca will bo
kept up through the summer.
The club run to Calhoun was well attended
and greatly enjoyed. Tlio run to Lake Man-
awa , however , curried off the p.ilm , being the
bust attended run yet called by Captain Em-
orson. At tha lake the boys had a great tlmo ,
every ono giving himself up to the hour.
The Omaha Wheel club will spend the
Fourth at Fremont us guests of the Fremont
club. There will bo a graad parade , nud the
Omaha contingent has been honored with the
lead , A largo number of members will leave
hero on the yd via the old military road , Tiioy
will depart at a p. m , , lunch at Elk City about
0 and arrive at Fremont shortly after ( j.
The bicycle nlpo is the latest. The patentee
Is an old uycllst , and knowing the Inconvo-
nlcnco of having a quiet smoke on a bicycle ,
ho has devised this uttuohmciit. It U made
to fit on the hundle-bnr , the pipe being secured -
cured by a nickel-plated clip and spring , nud
is connected to the rider by a flexible tube
with mouthpiece. All vibration to the tooth
Is done away with , aud the danger of sparks
and tobacco-ash lodging iu the eyes Is entire I
ly averted. The rider cun mount nud. dis
mount without detaching the pl ] > o. When
not riding , the p < t > o cun bo used as an ordin-
any ono , and a very Imndsomo pipe It mukus ,
Master Will Pixlny of Omaha deserves
moro credit and gained moro applause than
any starter at Chicago's greatest tournament.
Though but sixteen year * of ngo , ho demon
strated thu fact that ho was not to bo handi
capped by age , us some of our older riders can
verify , nnd noveral expressed the opinion that
ho was without doubt the coming man. Pis-
loy , in all of his races was well up at the
finish , nnd with another year's strength
nnd growth will surely hustle our fliers , He
is u wonder for hUugoaud slzo and knows all
tbo tricks oftthe track. Pcabody is a worthy
reyrcsciitutlvo oX the same city , aud guvo
Snootier a much closer nib for the 100 miles
than ha did a year ago. Taggur , also from
Omaha , did not appear to great advantage.
All of the Omaha men have a habit of riding
"on the head of their wheels , " nnd it was this
that caused Tiiggar to tnko a header over
nothing und throw himself , Barrett nnd Masl
out of the race. Chicago Sporting Hcvlow.
Miscellaneous Local Sports.
It Is reported that woodduck nro nesting
around tha sloughs nt Horseshoe lake and
Whiting In unusual numbers.
Advices from Missouri Valley report the
waters having subsided and that bass nnd
pickerel nro again taking the lure very wclli
Next Tuesday afternoon thcro will bo a
match shoot for the shells nnd birds between
two teams , flvo men each , from the Omaha
und Winchester clubs.
The pool rooms In this city , nnd thcro are
four ot them , all flourishing like cedars of Le
banon , nro the greatest existing factors In
rutting down the attendance at the ball
games ,
Some whaling channel cats have hern tttken
on trot Hues from the Missouri , off Florence ,
within the past few days. Ona 'monster ' ,
weighing seventy-eight pounds , was captured
Wednesday night last.
Pickard's ' Grove , southwest of the city ,
will bo the scene of considerable sport on tha
Fourth , Including a slow mule ruco lor ti
purse of $10 , amateur foot race , fat man's '
race , greased polo and greased pig , baseball ,
and a match pacing race for fiOO a sido.
The uncommon sight at this time of year
of nineteen wild geese , were seen flying
north over Iho city lost Thursday afternoon.
Where these birds Imvo been It would bo
dinicult to surmise , but it is auito nralmblo
they have been waiting down at Kansas City
to see Dave Howo's shoemakers try to play
bull.
Phil'Davios , the so-called champion light
weight of Colorado , Is In the city panting for
u fight with tiny 130-pound man who can bo
scared up. Davis would look a vast deal bet
ter in a briik yard or boiler factory than any
pluco else that can bo thought of just now.
Omaha will from this on give pugilists and
pugilism a very cold deal.
The Lincoln gun club will hold n grand
sweepstake tournament July ( and 5 , and
Messrs. Hughes , Kennedy , Slice. Pnrmclec ,
Gwin , Musselman , Latchaw , Clurko and
Townsend will go down from this city and
take u few arm fills of the laurels. Tlio tour
nament will bo conducted under the Ameri
can association rules and the shooters will bo
classified by u committee Into A and B grades.
The Grand Island gun club has challenged
the Omaha gun club for n match team shoot ,
ten men to each team , for from $10 to $ .10 u
side per each man. The challenge bus been
accepted and arrangements uro bciig made
to have the shoot como off In this city Imme
diately after the Fourth. If Grand Island
can congregate together ten men who can
hold n tallow cnndlo to the ten cracks from
the Omaha club she can win the earth.
The Iowa State Sportimen's nssoc ution
have elected the following olllcnrs for the cur
rent year : President , .1. G. Smith , Alguna ;
llrst vice president , A. J. Selwnrt , De.i
Molncs ; second vice president , W. IJ. Lefllng-
wcll , Clinton ; secretary , Nelson Hoyal , DCS
Moines ; treasurer , O. Perkins , DCS Molncs ;
directors , C. W. Budd and George Converse ,
DCS Moines ; N. S. Young , Burlington ;
Chnrlcu Grim , Clear Lake ; F. O. Davis ,
Davenport.
The American Shooting nsiociution has
mudo a much demanded change in its rules.
It formerly limited the charge of smot in a 1--
gauge gun to Ijf , ' ounces , which was tlio cause
of much dissatisfaction with those sportsmen ,
who in keeping up with modern ideas regarding
trap shooting , had provided themselves with
the lighter nnd moro sportstnanliko weipoa.
The limitation to 1 ) g ounces was regarded as
a hardship , and in response to the general de
mand the association now permits the use of
IJi ounces in guns of any calibre.
As a fish market Omaha seems to bo n fail
ure. It is a dilllcult matter to procure fresh
ilsh here , although It is on the borders of a
grcat Hshcpuniry. Minnesota's lake. } and
strcdmtcom'with the ganicy black bass" aiid
trout , the delicate pike nnd pickerel , the de
licious croppio and savory muskullonge , nnd
yet but small quantities of thcso midsummer
luxuries find their way into ttio local market.
It is an unaccountable fact Omaha is not a
fish-eating community , and yet , notwithstand
ing , it is ono of the brainiest cities iu the
country.
Questions nnd Answers.
C. B. X. , Council Bluffs Your question is
wholly unintelligible. Try again.
Will you please state in TIII : Bun whether
the old popular Western nsiociatlja umpire ,
Stcvo Il.iganwho died a year a o last winter ,
died from the effects or an injury received
from u foul-tip or notf John T. Cross , M.ir-
shalltown , la.
Ans. Stephen B. Hrjau died from blooJ
poisoning , consequent upan bjln strac'.t by a
wildly pitched ball. Ho died January 3,18S : ,
and was injured the previous season.
To deeiilo a wager will yoi ploiso publish
in Sunday's BcuJuek Crojlc-j' fuunus kitting
record in ono of the St. Paul gamui < II. II.
H. , city.
On Juno S , 183D , Crooks , in a ga-na with the
Apjstlcs on the St. Paul grounds , In flvo
times at the bat m ido flvo succoisivo hits ,
Including four homo runs.
Plcaso state in Sunday's Bnr. the longest
inning game the Onnh is pl-iyoil hnt soiwbn
and its principal features. I'bjt that the St.
Joe fourteen Inning gams was the longoit.
Do I win ? S. O. L. , South Omaha.
An ? . You loso. Omiha nnd Milwaukee ,
at Milwaukee , playo.l fifteen innings ou Au
gust -I , Milwaukee winning by n score of 7 to
( I. Nichols and Strauss were Omaha's bat
tery. The Brewcw undo thirteen hits off of
Kid and earned six of their seven runs. Alex-
nutlcr aud Hurley wcro Milwaukee's battery ,
and Omalia made twelve hits , earning llvo of
their six runs. The score by innings follows :
Milwaukee..a 1001000000000 it 7
Omaha 0 2100100000000 2-'J
Will you please stnto In Sunday's sporting
department whether the forty-eight hour ,
six houi'3 a dav , record of 7-10 1-5 iniltis" held
by Senator Morgan is boua lido or not t
Ciirrcy C. , St. Joe , Mo.
Ans. It Is. It was made nt Minneapolis
November 8 to 13 , 1880.
Please oblige n subicribar und ono inter
ested in wheeling by publishing the names
of the officers of the Omaha Wheel club.
Byko , Fro mout , Neb.
Ans. Perry Badollet , president ; II , II ,
Rhodes , vice prcsidsnt ; J. E. Eborsolo , sec
retary , and William Emerson , captain.
Horace , City. The specimen you scut hero
Thursday , Is a turnstone , ( Aronnrlu inter-
pros ) . Never heard of 0110 being shot at Cut
Off lake before , or any where In this region ,
for that matter. Natural history says they
are cosmopolitan In their habits , but the fact
is , they seldom leave the salt water shores.
Plcaso glvo a list of all the players signed
by the Omaha management this season. Also
stnto where Collins ami Kittle played pre
vious to coming to Omaha. C. ft ! . , Missouri
Vulloy.
Aus. Andrews , Collins , Wulsh , Cleveland ,
Cnnavan , Kcarns , Willis , Hlncs , Phulcn ,
Urquahart , Moran , Kittle , Clarke and
Thuyer , McConnell , Sommer , Bays and
Fnaiilng. The latter flvo have been let out.
Will you please state In Sunday's Bi'.B the
fastest tlmu mudo by a hose team for < ! 00
yards and couple I Subscriber , Kearney ,
Neb.
Neb.Ans.
Ans. The fastest time made by a hose
team previous to that made by the Kearney
team at Plattsmouth last week was 39 seconds
ends , made by the J. D . Servlss team of Ams
terdam , N. Y. Kearney's recent perform
ance , 3815 , beats the record.
Plcaso stnto in Sunday's IHu : the best thing
to feed a iiorso to regain his lleshl A Daily
Header , Omaha.
Ans. lee cream and Whlto mountain cake
nt this season of the year ; snow balls and
scrap iron Iu the winter.
In the decline of llfo , Infirmities bosct us to1
which our youth aim maturity were strang
ers , our kidneys nnd liver uro subject to do-
rangemeut , but nothing equals Dr. J. H.
McLean's Liver and Kidney Balm us a regulator
later of thcso organs.
HOW ORIENTALS ! KEEP COOL
Bomo Ideas by Whiclr'Sweltering Humanity
in Amorioa'ltay Profit ,
PRESS SPARINGLY AND BATHE OFTEN ,
Japan's Hot Hnths nntl the Hurmcso
Water Feast Wearing Hustles to
Get tliu Hrrey.es Adam and
Mvo Costumes.
, ISM , li\l \ Fftinli (7. Cnrpentfr.1
WA IHXOTOV , Juno ' 'JO. [ Special to Tun
Br.t.jWushIngton Is sweltering under n
mid-summer sun. Tho1 stutcsmcn nt the cup-
Itol arc In their summer clothes und every
man has hU recipe for keeping cool. 1 know
of u senntor who takes twclvo butlis n week
nt the government cxpcnso nnd there nro llf-
tccn members of the lower house who wear
seersucker coats mid flannel shirts. 1 visited
the National museum today to see the nppll-
nnccs which the people of the tropics have to
keep themselves cool. The Korean gentle
man has ti wlckcrwork shirt which keeps his
clothes away from the body and acts us a sort
of ventilator lying between his abdomen and
his gown. Ho has wicker cuffs which run
from his wrist to his elbow anil which are
made of the Hncst of stiff straw. Those keep
the alcoves nway from the person nnd the
Korean embassy at Washington Is the coolest
of all the legations. It 'is ' from these wi Uer
bustles worn over the belly that the Koreans
got their reputation of being such a fat race.
They nro fat , but not half so fat us Is sup
posed. It Is this wicker arrangement that in
creases their 'apparent ' ( xvoirdupolso , and as
fatness in Korea is u sign of wealth , there Is
no hesltuncy.shown by a thin man In trying
to make himself look like the fat mnn in the
dlmo museum. The Korean has the lightest
summer hat known to the world. It Is of the
sugar-loaf variety , Is made of horsehair and
it weighs but a few ounces.
The fan collection of the museum represents
all the countries of the cast. Even the Sand
wich islanders have fans and some of the
South sea malUens hldo their nudity behind n
fan made of fragrant grass ami not more than
six inches in diameter. The palm-leaf fans of
this country mid Europe arc all made at Can
ton In China and the Chinese nro
among the line fail-makers of the
world. During my trip' , arounil the world
I visited Peking and n number of
other Chinese cities , anil I found whole
streets devoted to the sitlb of fans and lan
terns. Swatoiv is a city lying on the coast
between Shanghai and Hong Kong , which is
noted for its llnq fans. 'Thcso funs are of line
paper stretched on a frame which curves at
the top and which thus produces u sort of bow
catching the wind nnd ' '
Making Them Delightfully Cooling.
The fans nro beautifully painted und the
pictures on them are th' < | b st exhibition of
Chinese fan art. Every Japanese imn and
woman carries a fan , and the fans which wo
got from Japan are of the cheapest variety.
In Japan the gentlemen usually use folding
fans , and they carry them in their bosoms ,
under their collars orjt'iclc into their girdle.
It is the ladies who use the flat fans , and it
would bo contrary to etiquette for a man to
appear on , the street with iv .fan , ' , that would
not fold up. Japan has its.fau etiquette , and
there is as much a language of the fan as a
language of flowers. The pretty Yum Yuins
of Tokio and Kiota oxproas through I'anning
what American lovers convoy by kissing , for
the hot osculation of America is unknown
among the Japanese cither in the summer erin
in the winter. The Japanese have autograph
fans us wo have , and many of the young people
ple make fan collections containing the signa
tures of their friends or versos of poetry writ
ten on them. Ono of the most striking char
acters of Tohlo is an old fan seller. She is u
woman of about eighty Who goes around with
fans and brooms nnd who cries her wares
from house to house.
An important cooling rccipo of the far cast
is the bath and the hotn bath Is taken by the
Japiiucso bcveral times a dav. The bathing
is done in the public bath rooms or in the
private tub and no sen i is used. Many.lap-
nncso are now parboiling themselves in water
raised to ISO0 Fahrenheit and the whole
family bathe In the sjamo tub. There Is u
model of one of thcso tubs at the National
museum and the average. Japanese bath tub
is about three feet high , oval in shape , nnd it
has iv llltlo furnnco with a stovepipe running
up above the top of thp tub set into one cud
of it. A board keeps this stovepipe from
touching the skin and ; a few moments will
heat the bath to boiling. The Japanese have
no false modesty as to the showing of their
person nnd it is not an uncommon thing in a
Japanese house to sco a lady at her bath , or
if you bo a guest to have one of the female
servants como In nnd
Ofl'or to ltiil > You Down.
Carter Harrison of Chicago was much sur
prised at this during his stay in Japan and ho
scalded the Jlosh off his fat calves In jumping
into the tub to get out of the way of the al-
mond-oycd beauty who came in to assist him.
I know a wealthy man in Washington who
was traveling In Japan the sauio tlmo that I
was who could not got enough of thcso hot
baths and who tnado a number of trips Into
the Interior of the country In order that ho
might liavo them with all their old .Fapanc.su
flavor. In many of the public bath houses of
Japan both sexes ImUio together nnd
on a hot day of July or August they splash
nnd play with ono another as innocent as our
parents were before the tall. In Tokto and
the other largo cities of the empire the for-
olgn Influence has produced an order agaitist
this common bathing of the sexes , but In the
villages where such nn'oifdorhas been imulo
all the people have done Is to draw a string
through the center of tub bath vat and the
women and children arq on the ono side
While the men are on tho'other. At a famous
hot springs In the Jnpanejp mountains I saw
both sexes hopping around together In the
water , splashing each other and enjoying the
sulphurous fumes withopt a thought that
there was anything' Indecent about their ac
tions.
The Siamese nro sp near' the equator tha
they have about the same hot weather the
year around. Every man , woman und child
iu Bangkok takes a plunge Into the river at
least throe times n day. Of the " 00,000 pco-
plo Iu the city at least 00,000 live in floating
houses nnd Inasmuch as the summer costumes
of the lower classes consists of n garment
about the sl/o.of u { Turkish towel , It Is not
much trouble for them to go in bathing.
They bathe on the steps of their houses and
stand up to the waist la the water grunting
delightfully 03 they pour bucket after bucketful -
etful over themselves and their neighbors.
The Burmese man and woman tnko a bath
Kvery Night After Dinner.
This bath Is merely pouring .water over the
iwrson. Soap is nearer used und particular
carq Is taken not to , wet the , hair. At Now
Year's , when the weather Is as hot as our
summer , those people have what they call a
water feast , and at this tlmo the whole nation
tluwv water upou ono another. All the pretty
girls go out with buckets nnd the boys Imvo
squirt guns and for three days thcra Is
nothing but wntcr-splashlng. The for
eigners of Knnpoon also engage in this
nnd the Chinese cclcbrato the feast with the
rest. Ono Chinaman rigged up a hydrant
with a two Inch ptpo during the ast feast nnd
as his house was on the main street ho had
the bulge , as It wcro on every ono else. Ho
engaged n coollo to work the machine all day
and as he was selling waterworks ho had a
good advertisement in addition to his fun.
A swell Englishman arrived in Bur in ah last
year during this feast. Ho went to cull on
ono of the leading men of Rangoon In tall
silk hat and black clothes mid was mot nt tlio
door by a girl with a bucket of water. The
girl asked him in Burmese as to whether ho
was observing the water feast and ho sup
posing that she wanted to know whether ho
had come to sco her father
Needed HlH Ilrnil
nnd with that nod this whole bucket of water
went over his silk hat and down the back of
his collar , completely drenching him. Dur
ing the snmo time another party of English
men were told that some girls wcro coming to
throw water on them. They had the ser
vants bring out the bath tub nnd put It on the
veranda nnd when the girls came they got
possession of the tub nnd splushed the Eng
lishmen until one. of them rushing in seized
ono of the maidens and lifting her up dropped
her Into the tub. This was considered very
impolite and the young man who did It suf
fered by receiving no further attentions from
the Burmese beauties.
Along the Ganges In India It Is n sacred
duty of the Hindoos to bathe once every day
and they can wnt > h away their sins while
they nro washing their bodies , I have seen
ten thousand bathing at the same tliftcat the
holy bath stops of Benares. There is , how
ever , no fun about the Hindoo bath. It Is all
religion and the b.Uhor prays during the
whole tlmo. ' Both sexes bathe in the river
at the Bunft ) time but they keep their
clothes on and they do not mix
together. The finest bath houses of India
are those belonging to the rajahs. The Mo
hammedans have perhaps the finest baths of
the far cast and the Mohammedans of India
Hpcml Fortune ; ) on ' 1 li 'If ItutliH.
The most costly baths of all Asia wcro those
of the Mohammedan kings at Agra und Delhi.
Iu the great palace of Ahbar at Agra there is
a vast bath room down under ground , the
walls of which nro mosaic of many pieces of
colored glass set with mirrors as big around
as your thumb mill. These mirrors arc num
bered by the tens of thousands and the whole
brilliantly lighted must have been dazzling in
the spray of the fountains. Ho'oAkbaruscd
to bathe with his Irirem and ho reminds mo
of the khedive of Egypt who cooled himself
by riding around the lakes in his palace
grounds with his fairest beauties and now
and then giving ono , a shove overboard to heo
if she could swim. I saw at Delhi in ono of
the palaces of Shah Jehan the man who made
the peacock throne which cost S0,000,000 ! , a
bath which cost a fortune. It had room after
roo.in of marble and there wcro hot pipes and
cold fountains and it is said that ono of this
mail's successors when ho suspected oiio of
hH wives to bo unfaithful was wont to lock
her up' in this bath , turn the hot water and
forget all about her. The result was that she
awoke iu heaven. The Turks of Egypt and
of Turkey spend a great p.irt of their tlmo in
the bath ami the Turkish bath is too well
known In the United States to need descrip
tion.a
The rajahs of India Imvo got the art of
keeping cool down to a science. One of tno
finest cities of the far east is that of Joyporo.
It is the capital of n unlive state. All of its
buildings are rose-colored and they were all
built after ono style of architecture. The
palace of Iho rajah Is in vast gardens through
which rivers of water How in marble beds and
in which the luxuriant flowow and trees of
the tropics bloom. The Imrom of the rajah
of Joyporo looks out upon this garden und its
fair ladies are
Kept Cool Hy Fanning SIHIs
turned by hand. It takes a score of men to
turn the cranks to keep theao nriidons cool
and man-power has much to do with the re
frigerators of the east. There are thousands
of foreigners , Americans , English , Germans
and French now at work in Asia , aud each of
thcso does his bookkeeping under the bree/.o
of the punkuh. The punkah Is a long fan-liko
strip of cloth fastened to a beam which is
hung by ropes from the ceiling over the man's
head. To the middle of this beam u rope i. %
fastened and this rope is put through a pulley
and so arranged that a man sitting out of
doors and pulling at It will mnko the fan go
backward and forward over the bookkeeper's
head. The native pulls away all day long and
most foreigners have such a rigging put up
over their beds and keep the breezes blowing
In this way all night. You can get u China
man to do this for about fifteen cents a day
and your servant in India will work even
cheaper. Now and then your punkah man
goes to sleep and you notice the stoppage of
the air. All you have to do In this case is to
lift up a bucket of watnr and throw It out of
the window. A good drenching wakes up the
puukuhwalla and ho goes to work again. I
have seen thirty of thcso punkahs ut work in
a church while the Episcopalian minister was
reading the service , and tlio breeze added to
the sermon was decidedly soporific.
This church was at Singapore , just eighty
miles from the equator , where the sun rises
uud sets the sumo hour the your around.
Here I saw n lawn tennis mutch. The par
ticipants wcro foreigners , the ladles dressed
In linen costume and the men In whlto flannel
suits. Each player had a servant to run
alter the ball for him when it happened to go
outside the bounds , aud they did not take a
bit more exercise than was necessary. The
modes of exercise In the fur cast are of Inter
est to people who want to keep cool nud still
maintain u hculthy condition in hot weather.
Foreigners In Asia get up at daybreak , take
a good ride ucross the country or u walk be
fore the sun gets up. They take n sleep in
the middle of the day nud work on into the
evening. They drink
A Great Deal of Whisky ,
but whether this has a cooling influence or
not I do not know. A great part of the hard
work of the east Is done at night , and this is
especially so in the great government depart
ments. The king of Korea holds all his audi
ences nt night and the omparor of China
takes all his sleep In the duytlmo. This Is
so with the king of Slam , and the sultan of
Turkey never goes to sleep until 1 o'clock in
the morning ,
The question of water in the far east is an
important one and tlio water carriers form
onoof the largest castes of India. Both hero
und in India they curry their water in skins
upon their bucks nnd they
Sell It liy the Cup
and by the skinful. Thcso skin-bags nro
mudo of hog skins or goal skins und the ordi
nary skin will hold ten gallons. Water Is
worth about a cent a skin and the streets of
Calcutta are watered by these men , who
sprinkle the water from the skin upon the
dust. The street waterworks of Korea con
sists of a set of men who go urounu with
buckcta of water on their bucks , and la
Jupan the streets uro kept cool by u inuii who
carries two buckets of water fastened to a
polo over his shoulders and lets the water out
through little holes In their bottoms. Both
In Korea and Japan the water used for this
purpose is taken from the gutters , which
form to n largo extent the sewers of the city ,
and the cooling of the air Is by no moans a
purification of It ,
The question of kccptnc cool is largely a
matter of drc. s. Mr. Hockhlll , the American
who pushed his way Into Thibet last year ,
wore a Chinese costume during the journey
nnd ho tells mo It is far cooler than the Ameri
can. All of the nations of the cast
dress much better in this re
spect than wo do. The Japanese during the
summer hat practically nothing but u cotton
gown to rover his person and his lops are
bare. If ho Is a working man or of ono of
the poorer classes ho takes off every stitch of
clothing with ttio exception of n cloth around
the loins and trusts to the tattooed marks on
his back nnd legs to cover his nakedness.
This moilo of dressing Is now prohibited In
the cities but It is not nt all uncommon In the
country , ami In going through Japan you sco
both women und men chid In a dress not
much more extensive than that
Worn liy Adam and Kvo
in the garden. A woman who Is washing
clothes thinks nothing of pulling her dress
down to her waist and the man who pulls
your jtnriksha Into the country frequently
takes off Ills clothes and runs naked with the
exception of his loin cloth. Ono of the nicest
old foreign ladies In Japan during the past
few years has been the wife of our consul-
general at Yokohama. She came from Ken
tucky and she could not got reconcile 1 to this
nakedness of the pcoplo. Whenever u Jin-
rlkshu man attempted to take } off his coat or
shirt when ho was pulling tor carriage , she
decidedly objected , nnd when she llrst came *
to Japan I am told that she often stopped the
pretty llttlo Jap girls on the streets und
pinned their dresses close up to the throat ,
telling thorn that it was Immodest to show so
much of their bosoms.
The Chinese pantaloons nro very full and
no ono wears drawers. The Korean has
nants so baggy that they will reach clear up
to his neck , though ho fastens them about his
waist , and the Korean woman wraps her
skirt around her bosom just under the arms ,
nnd there Is often six inches of brown skin
showing between this and the llttlo sacquo
which COVCH her shoulder. A Siamese workIng -
Ing woman frequently wears nothing over
her shoulders and breasts , and she wraps the
cloth about her waist and pulls It in through
the legs , tucking It in nt the back in such a
way that her limbs are bare to the kueo. It
is the sumo with the Malay women as far as
the upper part of the dress is concerned , nnd
over in Borneo you will sco plump round girls
with llttlo mows than a breech clout to cover
their nakedness. The Burmese woman
dresses in the finest of silks , but her dress
consists of ono long piece which she wraps
around her waist and lets fall to her feet.
This is tied at the front , and the opening is
at this place , but the girls have from long
practice acquired
A Graceful Kloklnjj
with the fcot , by which they are enabled to
keep their gowns together and avoid any ex
posure of the person. They wear sacques
and are the brightest and prottiust women of
the cast. A greater part of the Indians , both
men and womendrcss in white cotton sheets ,
and the common people of Egypt wear blue
cotton gowus. As to children those of tha
Orient wear practically nothing , and I have
scon girls of ten on the streets of Bangkok
iig ake as. yUon tliQ TCro ni.ji X e
pot-bellied yoifngstors waddling'nrjimd In
the nttiro of Cupid throughout the streets <
nnd country roads of Korea , and though
Japanese children wear clothes llko their
parents , when the weather is at all cold , they
often shed them when it is hot. There are a
great many mosquitoes in Slam , and the
Siamese have a yellow powder which they
rub over the bodies of their children to keep
off the insects. It turns the babies to a
rich chrome color , and under the sun makes
them slime llko gold.
The houses of the far east are better
adapted to tlio weather than ours. The
Japanese house is forfned of sliding walls of
paper so made that he can tnko them out ,
throw his whole homo into ono room , or make
his house consist of a roof and floor. His
floors are usually some distance apovo the
ground nnd there is a draught of air under
them. They nro covered with matting and
nro not cluttered up with furniture. The
Japanese house of the ucttcr chuss has a
heavy roof , but It has none of the sanitary
conveniences of the Japanese. None of the
Siamese houses have windows , and those
which arc on the water have breezes
HlowiiiK Continually Through Thorn.
The land hruses are built high up on piles
and the same Istruoof the houses InBurmah.
The Egyptian houses have very Illicit walls ,
their roofs are flat and thick and their In
teriors nro wonderfully cool. In most of the
Egyptian villages n'nd cities the business is
done in the bazars and the streets ro covered
with matting which is stretched from roof to
roof from the houses on each side so that the
customers never gut In the sun In going from
ono store to another. The bazars of Unngooii
ami Burmah are all under ono roof and the
vast business of Constantinople Is made up of
miles of llttlo booths arranged in streets
under ono vast roof. Among the coolest
houses of the far cast are those of Jerusa
lem. The pcoplo hero live In places that look
like caves and their houses are in the shape
of caves. The roofs are very thick and each
has a llttlo dome built in the top of it. The
roofs are flat and many of the people during
the hot weather bring out their beds and
sleep on the house tops.
tops.FIUNK
FIUNK G. CAJUT.XTUII.
Itathcr Endmrrnsscd.
Atkinson ( Neb. ) Graphic : A good story
on a neighboring editor Is going the rounds ;
and wo Imvo it on the best authority that It
happened at Stuifrt. It is to the effect that
the pencil pusher went out to report n porty
the other evening where the homo had re
cently been blessed with a now baby. Ac
companied by his best plrl ho met the hostess
at the door , und after the usiua salutations ,
asked after the baby's health. The lady ,
who was quite deaf and Buffering with the
grippe , thought he was asking about her
cold , and told him that although she usually
had OHO every spring , this was the worst ono
she over hud ; It kept her awake nights a
good deal at first and confined her to her bod.
Then , noticing that the scribe was getting
palo and nervous , she said that she could tell
by his looks that ho was going to 'itivo ono
just llko hers , and asked him to go In und Hit
down. The paper was out as usual the next
weolr , but the editor has quit Inquiring about
babies.
_
A Crushed "Journalist. "
Seattle Press t Colonel Lycurgcs Ochlltop
mot the town crlor yesterday mid-mild : "Do
you know , sub , that I , sub , was once a news
paper reporter , tali I But I only worked for
a day , puh. It wilt after the wall , sab , and
being hard up , sab , I accepted a imsitlon on a
tmpuh , at Columbia , sail , The editor. Major
Shiner , sent mo to the capital to Interview
the governor , sah , on the political issues of
the day , sah. I had began tno article , sah. as
follows : 'Colonel ' Lycurgos Octillion , late of
the TwelUh South Carolina , O. S. A. , nnd
now reporter of the Columbia Gusher , ac
companied by the governor of South Carolina
lina , proceeded to the Southern hotel , and
the former interviewed the latter as follows1 !
"Tho beastly editor objected to that , and
said i
11 'Colonel , you nro a bigger man than the
governor of South Carolina , mid , therefore ,
too largo to work on the ( ! usher. Your ser
vices > , ; ; ; , therefore , no longer bo required ,
uali. '
' I called the saucy fellow out , sah , for the
offense , and ho winged mo. sab , and that's
the reason why I'm Iu Soatilo today , sab , and
walk lame , sub. But for thb episode , sub ,
would by this time , sub , have bccu a grea
Journalist , sak. "
THOUGHTS IN LIGHTER VEIN-
A Sheaf of Grain Gleaned From the
of Wit and Humor.
BREEZY BITS FOR THE SUMMER.
" " " "
Her Uutlilng Suit lit an Knvolopo- *
Why Ho Wanted n I'ciiHlon A.
Nebraska Kd I tor's Mistake
Kuw Clly Dirt.
Ills Tinst Chance.
Birmingham Post : Boy ( to his friend , who
lias fallen down a hole ) I say , Tommy. If
you shouldn't over como out of there nllvo
can I have your bull pup I
Willing to Accommodate.
New York Herald : "I'll have the last
word. " shrieked an angry wlfo who wna
scolding her husband , "though I should dlo
for It. " "Prav take It , my dear , on your own
terms , nud welcome , " was his quiet but irrl *
tilting reply. _ _
Not. Unruiisniinhle.
New Moon : Molllo I wonder how the cx
pression "nn arm of the sea" originated I
Harry ( with a tender look ) Perhaps some *
body noticed that it hugged the shore.
Used to It.
Munsoy's Weekly : Mistress Bridget , I
wouldn't hung the clothes on that electrlo
wire. You may get shocked.
Bridget Sure mum , I've soon ' 0111 all bo
fore.
_
T
Not Without Parallel.
Tcrro Iliuita Express : Mr. Peck I think
if any ono Is entitled to u pension It's mo.
Mudgo You wcro never In the war , wcro
you I
Mr. Pcclc No : but the fellow my wife waa
engaged to got killed at Shiloh.
Standing Up for Her Friend.
Chicago Tribune : Mr. Ilanklnson ( at the
party ) "What a dainty eater Miss Knjonca
Is I"
I"Miss
Miss Kcrsmith ( bosom friend of Miss Kcr-
Jones ) "Indeed , Mr. Hnnklnson , you do the
dear girl injustice. After her tea and angel
cake at a banquet llko this you have never
seen her at homo in front of u plato of cold
. "
sausage. _
At the Fencers' .
Harper's Bazar : ( The ladies' class in scs
slon ) .
Visitor Is that Eleanor Larkln over there
with those girls ?
Miss Pariauthrust Yes ; she comes hero
frequently.
Visitor Docs the exercise do her peed ?
Miss Parianthrust I don't know how thai
Is ; but she has a stunning fencing suit that
docs her a great deal of good.
A Clow.
New York Tribune : Detective ( to coun
try grocer who had been robbed ) What
kind of goods did the burglar take ) ,
Storekeeper No goods ; only money ; didn't
even touch my cigars.
Detective Ah , there's a clew ; musthavo )
been somebody who knows the place. |
'
Pretty Well Out.
Chicago Tribune : The Kansas City roaV
estate agent was showing to the capitalist1
some choice suburban lots.
"What is your price for thcso ! " Inquired'
the capitalist.
"Tweuty-flvo dollars a front foot. "
"I can got them cheaper than that , " was
the decided rejoinder. "A Wichita real estate
man offered mo thcso same lots last week uC
' .50. "
_ ,
. .nf odcrn AVuy.
Puck : Mrs. Cottonback Tl is book tort
, boys says the way to succeed in this world late
to do two dollars' worth of work for ? 1.
Circumstantial Kvldcucc. '
Munsoy's Weekly : Bridget Is it thru ,
mum , the master's glvo up drinkin' i
Mistress Yes , but why do you ask ? I
Bridget Nuthiti' mum , ownly the cloves
bo goln' faster thin Ivor I
Mixed on the Accent.
Puck : Count Homperhelm AMU you
always loaf mo1 mine lecdlovon ?
Miss Phillydcl-Wcll , Hcinrich , I will for
a year or two , but after that I think you
really ought to go into the business.
At the Criticism Club.
Life : "Consider the range of subjects la
Shakespeare. "
"Perfectly marvelous , but there is ono
thing about Shakespeare that I never could
understand. "
"What was that ? "
"How with his dramatic power ho could
leave untouched so magnificent an opportun
ity as that afforded by Charles and Crom
well. "
_
Innocence Abroad.
Life : Ned 'Bunco ( accosting Timothy
Clover on the street ) llow-dy , sir ; you
scorn to bo qulto familiar with the city. Will
you bo good enough to inform mo whore I can
find the McGinty statue ) I am a stranger
here.
Timothy Clover Knln't nllus go by th1
looks , friend. I bo a stranger In town my
self 1
1Ned
Ned Bunco You don't sny so ?
Timothy Clover Yep. For n fuc1.
After the Play.
Munsoy's Weekly : "Kcully her Juliet is
too soft for anything , " said Mrs. Fanglo as
she loft tha theater , "Don't you think sol"
"Don't know I'm sure , " replied Mr. Fanglo ,
absent mlndedly. "I never squeezed her. "
Hiiro Sign of Death.
Rochester Herald : "On flvo succosslvo
nights last week , as I was on my way homo
ut about midnight , a black cut crossed my
path , " said a west nvcnuo man to a Herald ,
representative yesterday. "Well , what of
111" Inquired the newspaper man. "Why , It
is a sure sign of death , " was the reply , "Jt
am not superstitious about anything also , but
I toll you this sign never fuils ( " "But It ap
peal's to have failed this tlmo , " said the mini
of news. "No , it hasn't , " said the super
stitious man. "It hold good , because I killed
the cat with n chunk of coal on the fifth
night. A black cat crossing your path Is i )
sure sign of death. "
An ICnfant Torrllilu In Church.
Leeds Mercury : Hccently a lady took lies
llttlo boy to a church In Lcods , Ho was a
very llttlo boy and It wai his first visit to
church. The organ began to nluy and the
child turned to his mother and Hiked in a
loud whisper :
"What's that , mamma ? "
"Hush , dear , It's the organ. "
"An organ In church I" whispered the
small boy , evidently much astonished , and
Impressed.
Then a puuso of expectation , and a clergy
man , small of stature , appeared la very
gorgeous vestments.
"O , look , mammal" called out the enfant
terrible In clear accents , "is that the
monkey 1"
The
Now York Weekly,1 Farmer Acorn I
don't ecu what wo'ro ( join1 tcr do. Mlrunder.
The garden crupi Is all rotted by the ruin , the
fruit Is all spoiled by the frost , the well wate
ain't lit to drink any inoru , und oven' covv
wo'vo got has gone dry --won't have a drop o1
milk for tnrco months , Cheerful Helpmatu >
Never mind , Joshua , we'll got along. I'll tuko
summer boarders ,
The Modern Dialling Knit.
Boston Courier : Brother Tom There you
are , Mali. Everything Is packed ; and now
for a brilliant opening In the play of scnnldo
cngUKeincntn. Mali Yes , but that horrid
man hasn't scut mo my bathing suit. B. T
I guess It's coming now. M. Do you thluli
sol II. T.--Ycs ; thuro's u messenger boy
coming up the avenue with an envelope.
Now Comes UOIIHO , Itan , fit"
Absolutely flro proof. Fine-it -
hotel In Kansas City. Uuoxu
polutmeuta ,