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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 22, 1889)
- hb t I The Omaha Sunday Bee I _ I . -I . mi i j iB m - p < m4 ' B NINETlSBN'ra YEAH OMAHA , SUNDAY MOBNTNG , DEQEMBEll 22 , TWENTY PAGES NUMUEll 183 I | Toys Awful Cheap in Our TTUHhT P AID Dolls Wonderfully Cheap in Our I I \k \ BASEMENT * ] 1 life I J lilL | * BASEMENT * | I 502 , 504 , 506 , 508 and 510 SOUTH 13TH STREET We Proclaim to the Masses of the People , WE ARE YOUR STORE AND WE CATER FOR YOUR TRADE I Uptown stores ask , in many instances , twice as much for fancy articles as we do Unequalled attractions , unexcelled in the matter of prices at which we sell our goods IOOO IDOZE3ST SILK MUFFLERS I AND HANDKERCHIEFS Just received by express rrom the great auction sale of Messrs- Field , Chapman & Kenner , UG4 , 366 Broadway , New York City This was the largest sale or Silk Murders that has ever taken place In New York , and our buyer secured some very choice goods at very low prices , These goods go on sale Monday and Tuesday LOT 1 : BROCA BED MUFFLERS This is an olotrailt Brocaded Mulllor , an oxuut imitation of silk , In cream und win to only We have always sold for GOo _ : tLOT 2 : COLORED SATEEN MUFFLERS This is in very showy colors , in all bright colors , full Bio , and a real bargain • LOT 3 : ALI , SILK MUFFLERS This lot includes ever GO different stylus of Mufflers , plain whtto , brocaded and all colors LOT 4 : I IMPORTED SILK MUFFLERS In this lot are souio oi the llncst Mulllurs wo ever car ried : in ondlcss variety LOT 6 : VERY FINEST MUFFLERS In this lot are Muftlem that would bo a bargain at&l.CO if bought in the regular way Wo offer them at 5-1.40. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ lot 6 : SILK HANDKERCHIEFS This is a nice largo All Silk Handkerchief , plain and brocaded , in doyens of different styles - LOT 7 : SILK HANDKERCHIEFS This lot comprises ever 20 different styles ot very fine and cholco Hundkorchiofs AT 15c Worth 50e. AT 49c • Worth $ lQO AT 75c Worth $1.50. AT 99c Worth 63.QO. AT $1.49 Worth up to $3.50 AT Worth 50c. AT 49c Worth 81.00. I J. L. BRANDEIS & SONS , SOi ! , 301 , 500 , 508 , 5IO SOUTH lflTH STICGCT I THE POURING Of LIBATIONS m ' How Christmas Whs Spoat in m Omaha by Early Oitizsna M SOME OU rSTANDING ACCOUNTS H Probnlily llio first Turkey Which B liver Graced tlio Table of an 1 Omaha Man and H its H They Wcro All Younsr 'OMEofthostnidold _ _ B ' < TZ citizens of Omaha , H ' * . the men who today B ' & roprosunt the city's- H /f/IfflilJlfilflffklS won aD(1 dignity , BJMffllllllfllvifitBEi. may not romom or E si * ffi * n a 'ow W00'B ' t'10 = = wa B EI f J * 1I ploaEuros that the _ i 8 * P * tf * coming Christmas J • " • ' .Cita will lmvo brought H thorn They will soon forgot just _ whut Christmas it was that their HJ [ children made thorn a present of some BJ | ologuut contrivance in gold and gilt , _ but they will always remember the first Christmas they spent in Omaha when , BH away from homo and homo associations , BB they llllod their Bystoms with eggnog BB and apple toddy , and took part in a Bfl frontier Christmas celebration There BB Is a * score or more 111 on in Omaha who BB oamo here between 1810 and 1800 when BB Omaha was simply a trading post with al out pretensions or prospects The BB celebrations wore crude In the ab- BB Bonco of homes , churches and social B _ | organizations , the male population of BJ | the village celebrated the day in a BB method that made up in vigor whut was BJl lacking in decoium BJ | "I can remember Christmas In Omaha B in 1851 , " said Constable William Snow B _ | dan " 1 hnd n house which was used as B _ | a boarding house down on Tenth street , BJ just opposite Mot * hull I used to lmvo B _ | ' a hulf-intoroRt 111 1150 acres of land lying Bff east of Twentieth street , nud tukirg hi Bi what is now Ilascall's park I roinotn- BM her I sold forty acres of it just before BE' Christmas in 1854 , and was right iu line Bl f ° r a time with the boys There was n BV general store on Twelfth and Jackson Bv streets that carried everything Two Blnrtlolo / * they carried I remember , and they were whisky of 11 vary poor quality ' and some garden seed that uovor had a fulrcluinco to o.\ort itself Well , on ChristmasIn 1854.tho boys got 011 a spree and drank up all the whisky und planted the garden seeds iu the snow Whom do 1 moan by the boysV I wont toll you Many of thorn are hare now iu high places , and B _ | never drink anything cheaper than champaguo , ana they wouldn't euro to have tltoir nuincs mentioned in the little festivities in which wo used to indulge Whnldid I lmvo for dlu- Bl "ol" I" ' 6 * ? That I dent remember , ox- copttliatwo didn't lmvo turkoWo , hud to got all our luxuries from Iowa iu BB , those daysund they came high.too high BB tov us most of the time " BRj : * r Snowdou's house was the scouo of It the first religious services houl iu { Omaha , iu August 1851. llev Mr , K Cooper , a Council Ulutlj miuistor , also HH preached at Snowdon's on Sunday bo lero Chribtmas of that year Mr A. B. Moore was in Omaha in 1854 , and remembers his Christmas cel ebration very well ' There woro'nt many of us , " said Mr Moore , but wo made up wtint wo lacked in 11 timbers by noisoand our energy in gottlng around There were only a few ladles in Omaha at the time , mid A. J. Haubcom John I. Redick' , und some of those follows who werp the dudes of these days , got the girls , und the rest of us had to stug it Wo had a session ever a barrel full of eggnog , a very popular drink in those days and a very otfectlvo ono too , and when wa got through wo didn't pay much attention to the location of side walks , but took the streets tor it The next year , or in 1857 I guess it was the logisfuturo wus iu session und on Christ mas wo orgnni/od u , third house and had a mock session of the legislature I remember I vas _ a member of the committee - mittoo on matrimony una had some fun out of A. JPopploton a member of the loijislaiuro , who was lcocpsng company with old man Sears daughter ever in Council Bluffs J. Sterling Morton made us a speech and after that wo wont out on a p.iintlng oxpodltion as you young follows now call it I dent remember just how it wound up Wo hnd uo trouble with the police , however - over , as all the state and town officials wcro in the party H. H. Judson , who used to run a hotel on Douglas street near Fourteenth , was louder of thodunco wo had that njglit after our mock lugis- laturo had adjourned " Mr John A. Ilorbaoh was in Omnhti on Christmas in 1855 and has a very dis tinct recollection ol the fostivltics of that occasion "Tlio Farnluim hou30 , " said Mr Ilorbaoh , ' now used for an ag ricultural warehouse on JJarnoy street near Thlrtoonth had just boon opened and nil of the members of the legislature stepped there I had a commission house at the tlmo and sold the proprietor * of the place $01 worth of whisky and ether liquors , and I have the account 011 my books yet All of the big guns got leaded with that whisky und raarohod up Douglas street forty nbroust , yelling ' hue Modocs The wt'ntor wus a fear fully sovcro ono and many of the Mor mons who wora'fhon quartered at Flor ence died from cold ana hunger There were four foot of snow on the ground from the 11 rat of December until late iu March " The prlco of turkey is ono of the things that Mr Ilermun Kount/o ro- meuibors nbout the Christmas of 1850. "I was living then , " said Mr Kountzo , with my brother Augustus und a wid owed sister , iu ullttlo tog cabin out on Tontn street where my prosout homo now Blauds The day before Cnrlstinus a man came in here from some place in Iowa , with a wagon loud of turkeys for the Christmas trade I paid $5 for ono , they were luxurlos iu these days , and wo li'id a turkey dinner for Christmas und thought wo were living high " Fred Drexel came to Omaha iu 1650 und located on a farm of & > 0 ueros where the South Omaha stockyards are now located 'Uo spout his first Christ mas in Nebraska in hauling wood to Omaha Tom Swift came to Omaha in 1850and recalls tlio first Christmas ho' ' spent iu this boction of , the country "I slept that night In an old log hut iu Madison county Salisbury was running a mill In these days and I was huuling stulT to the moii I toll you it was lonely in that cabin that night It was the first Christmas I had spout away from homo It was cold O golly I There was snow four feet deep all around mo " "I was hero oa Christmas la 1650 , " HERE ARE OUR PRICES ON CLOAKST Our ntock or i'louUt In entirely to litrec , mid tomorrow thry miiMt be Hold Value * or coxt not taken mt > roiiiiilcriittoii Plush Cloaks ! Newmarkets ! H $ 7.50 8L$4.00 ilf $ 15.50 jBl S 5.00 Gun * . in.oo fhrtr" ffounjhJS.oo 4 * * "A SEAL V'/lvflll -4M.WOOUW" , / hB | CLOAKS , \ PfcVMNKU'UAliKIiT , I BUU seal v/K Kb B airIi .R4ifJD t $ 0 Nil ° 7ik $15.50 JML $12.50 MILLINERY LET 'ER GO , SANTA CLAUS SALE ! IIA'I' .S , "ie UH : aSe 5Or , 7Civ , St eneli ; nuiliiim liulHui ; newest and , PA.\C1' Intent 1EA nliucs i'UEHS : , rtc , 10c , J5c , tJ5e , 33c , flOe , 7.1 ' < ' P ; nil clean , new koo < Is all oliatleN , [ PATTERN HATs ami KONNETS.Sl.flO to 8 ; 25 per cent Icm limit costolmaklus KooKbottom pileew Ioi'etcrjtlili.KUi inilliiiery Ot'CVIUXKI' KVEKI1VC gJVTII , OCMUCK J. L. BRANDEIS & gONS 502 , SOI , 500 , 50S , 5IO SOUTH 1 TI1 J.TUEET . said Mr James Crciglton ) , ' and re- raombor very distinctly that it kept rae very busy getting fuel enough to kcop ray family from freeing I lived at that time in a frame shanty at the cor ner of Fourteenth and Davenport streets , where I now live Turkey ? Why turkey that Christmas was taken fiom the side of a hog " Mr Joseph Burkor lived at Webster und Twonty-socond streets in 1830 and remembers his Christmas of that year because th'ov had no potatoes in the house Potatoes were scarce then , " ho said , and were worth S4 a bushel Wo had venison , I remember . that Christmas , and onions and a plum pud ding " George Modlock lived at Florence In 1855 , nnd ha 'd boon busy all fall digging wells He had a stake at Christmas and blow it in for a quarter of beef , a $ li ! barrel of Hour , three pounds of butter at 75 cents a pound , three bushels of potatoes at $3 a bushel and a gnllon of whiskey for $2. VICTIMS OF THIRST-MADNESS. , Tlio Modern Medical Tlipory of.Dlpso- miliili ) . An Unjust Lmw The poriodluvl dcslro for strong drink which sometimes besets individ uals otherwlso moral und oxoraplary is a Bpocios of paroxysmal mania beyond the control of the patient It is nulto certain that there are thousands of cases of remittent drunkonuosj which present the specific symptoms of dis ease The periodical drunkard is not a ha bitual dram arinkor But at particular times ho appears to bo attacked with a thirst inudnoss which deprives him of the power of volition , und hurries him into the most torrlblo oxcosss During the intorvnl during the paroxysms ho may bo a perfectly sober man For many weeks or oven months , ho may have steadily refused to tnsto a drop of liquor ; mayindeodhave felt noinclluu- tlon forit.but on the contrury rognrdod it with disgust And yet , when the fit comes on , the raging tliirst for alcohol utterly paralyzes his conscience and nls will will.A A man in this condition is a mono maul uo and should bo treated as ono , according to a wrltor in an English magazine If put under nropor restraint at the comraoneomont of this furor , the dinsomunlno , in ninoensosout of tan , might bo tided ever his difficulty in the course of a week und n perbovornuco in the course nt the recurrence of the hal lucination would probably eventuate In a complete euro It Is not easy to persuade the world that all drunkonnons is not voluntary The law does not recognl/o dipsomania It treuts all inebriates liliko This booms to bo unjust , although it is hard to say where the line should bo drawn between froo-wlll oxcossaud that which precedes from an uncontrollable mania m The funeral of Dr II , II Tucker , an eminent Baptist divine , whloh took place nt Atlanta a few days ugo , was uulquo in many respects Dr Tucker left a letter giving instructions con cerning his fun oral , lie directed that ho bo buried in n wood collln , eq that it might rot Ho instructed that prayers bo offered for anybody connootou by allhiity or consanguinity with his fam ily ; for anybody who had ever done a favor or good turn for him or his fam ily ; fur everybody who had injured him iu any way , There was to bo no address of any klud at the funeral , and no music , only prayornud reading of scrip ture Ills orders was carried out to the letter COr-TBEME-ON JR BLAINE Wliy Evarts Opposod'tha Removal of a Oousul HE COULDN'T FIND THE DOOR Tlion Sunset Cox Set up.tlio Drinks IlluiSRlf Soihorn ijnd tlio floor Lucky JJalilwin's Costly Sluinbo y ' Current Aneodotns When Mr Blaine wasj secretary of stnto under Garllold ono theory of his , and a not unpopular ono , was in favor of limited tenures arid rotation in olllco , says the Washington Post , If n consul hud slumbered through throe adminis trations at some fur-away postin a dolce far nionto of lotus-eating und salary drawing oxiBtonco , , thq keen secretary astounded him by Inviting a return to the shores of America and the appoint ment of his successor ' Mr Blaine sat in his private ofllco ono day discussing affairs of state with his immediate prcdecossorox-Socrctnry William Maximum Evarts Now , here , " said ho , "Is a case in point This man has bcou consul at Un Hung for for twouty years Ho wont there during the warnnd has remained there over siuco It is tlmo ho returned homo to bo acqualptod ! with his country before ho grows a queue If ho ' stays there much Ion gar ho will lmvo a Chi ncso bias in his sight , 'i shall roraovo him at once " ' . I "I wouldn't roraovo Iiim , Mr Secre tary , " replied Mr Eiurts Why notV" , "I am afraid it would } be an unpleas ant thing to do To be ; v.ulirar , 1 fear it would make a stink " \ "My mind Is mudo-up , " replied Mr Blaine ; "us Boon us { can find a good , live man to tuka his wuco , I shall ro- uiovo him " ' But I think you wljlf have a grave difficulty iu finding-ia. good , live man who would be willing tq.Uiko his place " "Ianticipato no sujBi > < jllllculty But will you explain to mp Mr Kvnrts , why you think there will bo any dilllculty , and I confess I full tq understand why it will , to use your expression , make u stin kV" Because this umplljas boon dead and burled these alxi iponths , Mr Soc rotary " j | Secretary Bayard otlco took part in the ceremony of unvolllpg a statute iu a park near the house occupied by Sunset - sot Cox , sayB the Pbjlailolphia Tolo- graph Mr Cox took an interest in the nlTuir , nud had u puoeh-bowl in his housoaround which ho assembled soma of his particular friends , among tholn Mr Bayard Mr Bayard was among the last to appour at the brink of the bowl , and was the lust guest in tlio house , All the others being gone the two wore qulto boolable , and were disposed to extend tholr sociability to brooder Holds Lots go take a glass with Senator - ator Blank ; ho'a my uoxt door neigh bor , " proposed the lit lo Now Vorkor The Doluwnrq statesman was pleased with the suggestion , so away they wont They ollmbod the front steps next door and nine the ball , ' 'la ' Senator Blank SBwiiCMffiCtifnTiWrr ? mrnttuomr' " " • • "tilfTtr" " - " " it - w Dress Goods Linings and Buttons at Half Price Tomorrow 75 Full lrc s Patterns of Double Fold Fancy Twilled Suitings , With Side Knoils , Tilts Is a lull Dress rattcrn 85 Dross Patterns of West quality English Broadcloth , Worth double this price A Full llrc s Pattern Of Genuine Cornet Brand Black Gios : Grain Silk , ] ( ) yards In each pattern 45 Dress Patterns Host Oiinllly Enflisli Henrietta . In lllnck and Colors 85 Llegnnt Dress Patterns , Silk Finish Henrietta , In Illuck and Colors A Full li ) ess Pattern , Containing 10 jnrds Very Wide Genuine llegntta Gros Grain Silk 1 1 ant bo duplicated 85 Urcss Patterns In French lniUrtcil | Tricot nnd CASTOR CLOTH , $3.40 $ Loot : at these SI Side Hand Fflcdfl PARIS ROBES , No two alike Worth 510. A Full Dress Pnttern Containing 10 jnrds Very Wide Elegant Casluuero 8UIHET SILK , $17.85 $ . None Hotter J. L. BRANDEIS & SONS , 502 , 50-1. 500 , 50S , 510 SOUTH ltfTH STltiJKlS ip1' Mr Cox aBkcd when the servant appeared Why , Mr Cox , " the ser vant replied , "Sonutor Blank lives next door on the other side " Why , to be sure ; to bo sure , " said Mr Cox , taking Bayard's band ; "I turned the wrong way It is next door on the ether side Bipht hero ; right next door , " and ho led the way up alow stone steps and rang the boll Ho was bound to bo riefht this time Does Senator Blank live horcV" ho asked "Fo the Led , no , Mr Cox ; you lives here yo'solf , " answered the darKoy at the door "O ; to bo sure ; to bo sure I guess wo wont call on the senator today Como In , Bayard , como in ; well have a glass of punch , " and again the two friends walked up to the bowl to gether They are tolling a story about E. II So them , says the New "VTork Sun Ho was coming up town la n car , and upon entering found the car full , though ono man took mora than his share by strotchiug his feet out along the scat Sothorn held on to the btrup and bore this for a while , but when two ludies entered and wcro obliged to stand his Sutlonco gave out Loaning ever the itTuscd man ho said in a clear , loud \olco , but with elaborate courtesy , and with his most honest andinnocont Dun dreary stammer : "E-oxcuso mme sir , for u-addrossing you , b-but I'm very anxious to Mourn w-whut nerve tonic you takoV" A grin spread ever the faces of the passengers , the man got rod , opoucd and shut his mouth two or three times , und then bounced up und loft the car , upon which the uetor and the two ludlcs bat down and Sothorn gu/.od pou- sivoly out of the window Congressman Stahlnockor told mo anew now story about the late S. S. Cox the other day , says the Now York Star Among the hitters friends in the house was Congressman Lovojoy a burly six footer with a big voice The two got into uii altercation about some petty matter in n dobato.and Lovojoy applied the epithet , of which the word "llttlo" was a part , that angered the wit When ho got u chnnco to reply , ho said "I hope that when my friend und follow member passes from thin mortal sparu toabouutiful hereafter , the people of the district which ho ro presents will build a monument ever him , to which they can point with prldo and say : There lies our congressman , Lovojoy , and tbntl may bo permitted to wrlto uu opltaph on ono side of it There , with the pormissiou of the house , will bo the words : "Ueueath this marble itono good old Love Joy lies : Llltlo in everything except bl size , iiut the his burly body tills the halo , Yet through bells keybolo crept his little soul " Of course , with his millions of wealth derived from his oloctrlcul machines , nobody would bo fool enough to ofTor to pay Inventor Edison for umusiug her guests , but a certain Fifth avanuo matron undertook to accomplish it by diplomacy Stio was going to give a reception , and through tv mutual friend bIio invltod Mr Kdieon to bo present Ho devotes no time or attention to soci ety of any sort.says the New York Star , but ho allowed hfmsolf to bo persuaded to become a guest on this occasion Uo has become accustomed to fume nnd the attention of scientists , but it is possible that ho felt just a llttlo flat terea by the countonunco of Now York swelldom Anyhowho commlttod him self to the reception On the day pre vious ho received a note from the pros pective hosloss very politely requesting him to bring along a ohnnograph , as elm thought Us operation by him would bo highly appreciated by the company , i I Then ho discerned the trap that was I sot for him , and ho kept clear of it by ' writing his regrets at being compelled to break the engagement It does not soora easy to renlizo how cheaply you live in California until you lmvo tried some of the eastern hotels , says the Sun L'ranclsco Chronicle E. J. Baldwin wont to a hotel in Now York for a rest Ho was only going to stay a" few hours in town , it was about 3 o'clock when ho registered , and ho wauted to take a little slcop before ho wus called at 10. The gontlomnnly cleric recognised the niiino nnd the man , and looked pleased to have a whack at the long purse of the Califor nia millionaire Baldwin had his sev eral hours sleep , and was called at 10 o'clock as ordered Ho wont to the olllco and asked for his bill It was handed to him $30. Mr Baldwin looked at It : "I am very much obliged to you for wuking mo at 10 oclock " Why ? " "If I had slept a few hours inoro it would have busted me " Colonel Thomnsat ono time member of congress , wus in the city this week , and umong talcs of the old days told the following about Thaddous Stevens , sa > s the Now York Tribune : "Thaddous Stovona wes sitting In his olllco ono day with u few friends when in walked an old lady , wearing a poke bonnet , blue goggles , nnd carrying a green alpaca umbrella She looked around the room us if in search of feomo duo , und then said solemnly : " Can you toll mo where to find Thaddous Stevens , the Apoatlo of Liberty - orty V Old Thud blushed " 'I'm Thaddous Stevens , ' ho replied shortly " Are you Thado-o-us Stevens , the Apostle of Llbortyi" " U reckon I nm , maam ' The old lady dropped her parasol , made a rush toward Stovona to kiss him , and when ho held her off , she said ; " 'I came from Bucks county to see Thud-e-us Stevens , the Apostle of Lib erty , and to take homo with mo a lock of his hair ' The Apostle of Liberty took off his red wig , handed it to her , and said : " There it is , ma'am , Tuko us much as you want ' " Hero is ono of the stories that A. M * Palmer brought back from his summer trip to Kuropo , says the Now York Sun Ho overheard an animated discussion iu the Victoria liotol , London , between an Englishman and a"Yunkoo , " as all citizens of the United States are called on the other sldo The dispute , of course , was relutlvo to the merits of the disputants respoutivo countries It hupponod that the American was a bit the readier with his tongue , and main tained his ground eo stubbornly that tlio Briton at lust gave it up with the remark : Well , you Yankees nro gottlng so bumptious that wo shall have to send ever un army pretty soon to take some of the concolt out of you " The Americans reply was ono word : "AnlnV" _ _ _ _ _ _ An old woman walking along a Brook lyn street with abundlo of sticks on Iter shoulder was accosted by a gang of rude boys who gave her u push and sent the wood flying in every direction , says the Rochester Ilorald An elegantly dressed gentleman came along , and lenrniuRtho cnuso of her distress , huutened to pick up her load without stopping to remove his now tau-colorod gloves lie piled Closing Out Sale I Blankets I AND > HI Comforters ! 1 l. 'SS Itilr Inrcc lull \ > ttltli Wlilto > | HliAMiiiK , i M 75c Fair Vorv flno . White or Sti\cr Crnj ItliW- I H icnr.s ; | H $1.25 Fair Ktnu Wool Wlutn llliYMCIOlS < _ W $1.69 Fair JIB Wry llncst IninD'a wool White IILAN- 1 _ _ ! $3.25. ] m 11-1 nil wont Cnllfbrnia Itli/VSHIPS' , Hj $5.00 Fair ; COMFORTERS Q fl . , . i'hFnt ? " ' H i.Aitiir yi/.i : a " § COMFOJ&TEKS J f J COMFORTERS gj COMFORTERS $ Qfj I , ' vnitv t'liir . Sateen COMFORTERS FllloctwltlilVre WhllVCotton , j - M $2.50 Each < J. L BRANDEIS & SONS I 502 , 501 , 500 , 508 , 510 8. l. 'itli St ' " ' 4 .H - ; t - - > H the sticks in the tattered apron , gave 1 1 tlio miciont dumo words of sympathy and ' H ' some small change , helped to place the : M bundle on her head , iind raising his hat 4 1 with iustinctivo politeness , passed mi , > | removing us ho did so his gloves , which it t wcro ruined beyond rudomption by the j l mud It was then that he was ioi-og- i M nlzed by a reporter as ox-Congressman H | Timothy L. WoodrulT . ] 4 _ | Walter Gale , the llitnpy Jack of The < * M Old Homestead , ' ' tells a good story of * H Roland Heed and the theatrical jiafis \ M llond , says the Now York Times It was _ H at ono of Reeds ongagomuntu at the tl l Grand opera house , Cliicago Hvcry Ifl seat was sold nightly , und "standingj'H room was a covotcd boon Ho was an 1 1 old acquaintance , who had gouofioni fH the stage into trade und found bettor | success Here is the dlaloguo of the | H scene : JH "llolund , ' cant you lot mo have two * H scuts for tonight ? " " 4jH Sorry , but the only wny I end give > 'H you two seats is to buy thorn " . < il "O See if cau't , pshnwl you tijuctwe - * H mo out two sentsV" , H "I toll you I can only do it by buying | _ | them " - ? Anywhere will do , Unu't you lls mo | fl in the balcony ) " ' 1 "If you must porsht , cnmo.with mo to , /i | the box ofllco , and Ill ' show you what I H elm do " V.B They go to the box ofllco , and Hoed | _ | pasbos In $5 with the romnrk , Give mo iB two scats.'U "Is that right , IlolandV" * | 1 | Why , of course it is ; dent you tee { fl my money thoruV" % iB ' Well ' , if you have got to pay for thorn * S _ | you might lis well make it three , My lijfl wife's sister would llko to go " | jH This wus too miioli for the comedian , fSH who walked uway , fet gottlng his 1 1 change , and mumbling upon the nbys- % B mal depths of human depravity " MU . i * v dHH | A young lady of Mississippi was visit 'JH Ing the blue gruss region of Kentucky , 111 and was outurtutnod at a diunur party mU nt the governors mansion , says the Suu -H Francisco Argonaut During the course ill of the dinner a dogonoruto son of the h | governor talked loosely about things iu ! g | gooorul , and among them of a visit In 31 Mississippi , remarking that ha hud not UH soon a pretty woman in his tour through * , | the state The girl from Mississippi 'III awaited her opportunity , nud during u _ lull in the conversation turned and J H usked the governor if whut she had H heard of the gontlomcd of Kentucky 3 _ | were true The govoanor wanted to 1 1 know what it was , and the attention of - M tno whole company vWis dirooted to the ja l ludy's remarks : Well , " said she , "I fj l heard that Koutucky gentlemen udu- 1 cato tholr horsoj and turn tholr bona - _ | out to gruss " J l Gorurul Joe Hdoltor , a member of ' 1 congress from the Seventh Misbibsippi - | dlBtriet , was ono of the heroes of the | Into war against the union Ho carries H an empty sleeve as a voile of his ex- | porloncos on the field Major Powell , * J | the chlof of the geological survey , waa _ in the union army und ho also carrion J l an empty Moore ( iunerul Hookers 1 1 lost arm is on his right side uud Major 191 Powell , ' * on the loft Tholr romululng - - • ; j9 _ bauds are of the sumo proportions , and j l they have n mutual agrooiuont uudpv | | which which thov purcliuso gloves iu S | common Major Powell using nil of the H rights and ( ionornl Hooker the | lofts , " No illlllculty eror occurs between - , | twoon thorn about the aolection of these _ | gloves , for they pay llttlo attention In ' ) _ the pereiiuiul ohuugo la thu modes and .1 _ | ' fashions , 'J |