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AND HE FAINTED. '
A prominent junior was sitting on
the library stoa the other day, search
ing among the passing throng for hfs
bench-work partner. Thoro was one of
theso dreamy looks In each of hlB eyes,
nnd his thoughts wandered. A small,
timid voice nearby attracted his atten
tion and he looked down to see a wom
an with a brown hat looking up at him.
"Do you go to school here?" inquired
the voice which, by the way, belonged
to the woman with the brown hat.
"Yes, ma'am," he replied, jerking his
hand toward his hat. She was neither
young nor beautiful, so ho did not re
move the hat. Moreover, a strong
wind was blowing.
"How long have you been going to
school here?"
"About six years" after a moment's
mental calculation.
An expression of profound relief ap
peared upon the anxious face beneath
the brown hat. "What course are you
in?"
The junior felt Inclined to shy, but
held himself in check, and stated that
ho was an electrical engineer.
This did not appear to please the
lady of the hat, but sho tried again.
"Are you well acquainted here?"
"I know most of the people who were
here when you came, madam, but that
has been so long ago that I would not
like to say now, but I will do my best
for you."
Sho closely scrutinized his features
for a few moments. "I believe I can
trust you," sho said. "Where is the
chemical laboratory?"
His many friends will be pleased to
learn that he Is slowly recovering.
A correspondent writes us regarding
the use of a and an before words be
ginning with ft. He asks whether the
rule to use an only when the ft ls'sllent
is correct.
Most certainly not. One of the most
important words in the English lan
guage will show how false the rule Is,
namely Anheuser-Busch.
J
A QUESTION OF INTERPRETATION.
Tho Yankton Student recently print
ed the following:
It is reported that a young man who
feared for his social standln' went to
tho college oracle with this question:
"is It propah, oh wise oracle, when re
fused by one maiden to go seek an
othah?" For an instant tho vast men
tal machinery creaked, then tho stony
lips opened and theso auspicious words
rumbled forth: "Wissen nicht, alio
recht." Tho youth was puzzled. Ho
founii n beginning Deutsche student
who translated it freely to mean:
"When Ignorance Is bliss 'tis folly to
be wise." Another beginning Deutscn
man said it was a perversion of tho
woll known proverb: "All's well that
ends well." Still another said that
tho thought could bo admirably ox
presHed in "Tho early bird catches tho
worm." At last ho found a wise man
who had failed in German for two
years, who gave him a satisiactory an
swer: "Why, you freak, it means that
you will bo all right in asking as many
girls ns you please until tho second;
third, or fourth choice catches on; then
look out."
Tho interpretation Is not entirely
correct. There Is not so muca impor
. -tanco attached to hrat choice as one
might imagine. To moat pooplo it
makes no particular difference (wlthm
certain limits, of course,) who thoy
-tako or with whom thoy go.
Therefore no slight is intonded or
felt if a girl Is second choice, It is al
most impossible that two or more men
Bhould not select tho samo girl for
somo occasion, unless tho slate system
is adopted, so what's tho use of both
orlng any oracle?
Thus far in our discussion wo have
utterly eliminated the solid couple and
tho "cases.'- Hero it makes a great dif
ference who goes with who. In the
case of solids the entire problem Is
solved by that well known and popu
lar economic law that "when an abso
lute monopoly exists, all competition
ceases."
In cases which are approaching so
lidity great care and previousness must
bo exercised or somo mere acquaint
ance or mayhap "another" is liable to
blunder in nnd make a date.
One man I know has been losing out
continually all winter, when his chance
was considered as very good, simply
because he was altogether too slow.
Ono suggests that ho did this to ob
tain tho credit without using tho cash,
but this is false, as all who know
him know.
J
ON A CASH BASIS.
Why can't folks be more genuine?
Why can't they say what they mean
or mean what they say?
Why must one discount every thing
he hears about 50 25 and 10 per cent?
The lecture room is just about tho
only place where you can safely take
everything you hear at Its face value.
Elsewhere con talks sway in tho hot
air.
This was forcibly brought home to
me when a friend read my face. He
said that it indicated lack of character.
He criticised the shape of of my head
and nose and the size of my ears and
the angle at which they stand out from
my head. Then ho said that my mouth
was weak. The expression in my eyes
must have frightened him, for he said:
"No offense, I hope?"
"I don't know whether you believe
that or not, but I certainly do not; so
what's the use of getting mad?"
It is much harder not to bellovo tho
nice things that are told you, than tho
unpleasant ones. When tho bouquets
come my way I am obliged to pinch
myself repeatedly In order to keep in
mind that it is all hot air.
This is tno psychological process.
You dont believe it, and therefore ink
tho speaker does not, or you don-'t be
llovo tho speaker believes It, and there
fore don't believe it yourselr. You
may bo wrong in either caso, but the
chances are that you will bo right.
If you are ono of these simple, trust
ful natures you will form an opinion of
other people's opinion of you tfiat is
entirely false. When you awake somo
day to the trutu fou will desplso your
self for being such an easy mark.
If there was somo way of knowing
how much is genuine ic woulu not be
quite so discouraging, but there Is none
and wo must go it blind.
1 llko to think that somo of tho nice
thlngB that havo been said to mo were
really meant. My strong sense of Jus
tice impolls mo to bellovo more than
moat people do, but we would all rather
be sure.
Let us get down on a cash basis; lot
ub cut out tho con talks and tho hot
air. Thoro Is enough good In the world
to furnish kind words for all. If wo
can not bo truthfully complimentary
lot us talk about our studies and tho
weather.
Two students havo been suspended
from tho University of Michigan for
participating in a freshman-sophomore
qlass scrap. Tho trouble aroso
over an-aUemnt to intorforo with a
smoker given by thejsophomoro class.
RED TICKET SALE!
We quote here a Pew Items Qatliered Here and There:
Red Ticket Belt Sale
50c Patent Leather Belts, lined nnd stitched 25c
Red Ticket Hdkf. Sale
100 dozen fine Sheet Hemstitched, J to 1-inch hem, worth 10c,
ench 5c
Red Ticket Fan Sale
70c White Silk Fans, lace edge, spangled and decorated, enam
eled wood bticks 49c
Red Ticket Lace Sale
French Val. Laces, and Jy inches wide, worth J3c yard, Red
Ticket Sale 12 yards for I5c
Red Ticket Hosiery Sale
Ladies' fast black Seamless Hose, spliced heel and toe, worth to
15c, pair 10c
Red Ticket India Linen Sale
Gc values for 3c yard; 12c values for IOC yard; 25c values for 20c yard.
Red Ticket Kid Glove Sale
Splendid assortment of fine Kid Gloves, regular 81.50 and $1.75
values, pair 95c
Red Ticket Shirt Sale
Gents' genuine Madras Shirts, no collars or cuffs, equal to any
81.00 shirt in the city '. 49c
JU'V
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rcmramiu
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ts WEAR "s
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