Pago 4
Tuesday, December 4, 1S34
Daily Nebraskan
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One foot on the brake,
One foot on the gas
too much traffic up ahead, I
can t pass
"...Take my license,
all that jive,
I can't drive 55..."
At least 47 percent of Ne
braska's drivers are singing
Sammy Hagar's lament and
putting the pedal to the metal so
to speak.
The Nebraska Department o
Roads recently issued a report
about speeding during the fiscal
year that ended Sept. 30, but
anyone who has driven on 1-80
knows that if you drive 55, you're
driving in the slow lane.
The department recorded the
speeds of 197,207 vehicles at 33
locations on four different types
of highways. The percentage of
those driving more than 55 is just
.4 percent less than last year, the
reporMays.
No law has been more univer
sally ignored since prohibition.
Many folks are calling for the abo
lition of the 55 m.p.h. limit on
stretches of rural highway, like
many of the stretches in Nebraska.
That isn't necessary. Anyone
who has traveled Nebraska's high
ways knows traffic generally
moves about 60 m.p.h. in spite of
the law.
Obviously the state patrol hasnt
passed out enough tickets, or
people don't care about tickets,
or both. Traveling on the nation's
big freeways, one also finds a
blatant disregard for the speed
limit; people drive as fast as traf
fic" is moving. In my experience,
it's rarely 55 usually it's closer
to 65.
Abolishing the national 55 m.p.h.
limit, even on rural highways,
would be ill-advised. The limit
has saved thousands of lives,
according to its advocates, and
about $2 billion a year in fuel
costs. Those saved lives and gal
lons of gas are much more valua
ble than saved hours.
If the limit was 65, drivers would
probably be tempted to travel 70.
Some drivers who were motoring
before the 55 limit said travel at
80 m.p.h. wasn't unusual when
the limit was 70 m.p.h. in Ne
braska. Raising the limit would
cost lives and money.
Nebraskans just won't drive
55!
U5URE Ik POR KEBPIN6 THE SPZBO LIMIT AT 55 ... THAT WAV
wdovs Goes ovbr so i
Dagger-wielding Santa to replace red-nosed deer
Call me sappy, but the aspect of holi
days which I most enjoy is the sweet
celebration of sentimentalism found
in the visual media. Take the current
Christmas holiday season. The media
presents us with precious Grinches who
steal Christmas, and then give it right
back better than before; we are provided
with precocious Rudolphs with red noses,
oh, so bright; and just recently Hollywood
has given us yet one more sugary celebra
tion of this most merry of seasons: A
crazed Santa wielding bloody death at
the end of a dagger.
Jim
Rogers
I get all choked up when I think of the
millions of little eyes lighting up with a
child-like innocence as corpse after bloody
corpse is deposited before them in the
movie "Silent Night, Deadly Night." What
can I say, but golly, thanks Hollywood.
Once again you've enriched our lives truly
beyond what we had a right to desire or
even imagine.
"Silent Night, Deadly Night," for these
few readers who did not begin their joy
ous celebrating with this movie, is yet the
latest playful, tender holiday film in the
respected genre begun by such great
films as "Halloween" and "Friday the 1 3th"
parts 1 through X (where X is any natural
number between zero and one million).
Gee, I just hope "Silent Night, Deadly
Night" isn't the last of the vanishing set of
truly excellent modern holiday films.
Frighteningly enough, if some spoil
sport scrooges have their way, our hoiday
seasons will no longer be graced by the
senseless violence of the mentally de
ranged and the half-deads or undeads,
whatever.
These mischievous miscreants are pic
keting the film in certain cities to prevent
its screening to individuals of tender
years. Now, the protesters really don't
bother me so much. After all, people have
a right to speak their minds. It's just that
they spoil the season for the kids, that's
what bothers me most. Christmas is a
time to be joyful, a time of giving. And just
because there's a movie about a Santa
giving frontal lobotomies at the neck
instead of electric trains or little dollies
that cry "mama" doesn't mean that it's
not in the Christmas spirit it's all giving
aft er all
Well, happily, I don't think "Silent Night,
Deadly Night" will be th e last holiday flick
which gets us in the mood through mind
less and gratuitous violence without a
doubt the perfect addition to any family
holiday celebration. Indeed, I've disco
vered that Hollywood is planning to sea
son other seasons with a slight dash of
senseless bloodletting.
Before we take a preview peak at these
other Hollywood gifts, however, I must
posit a caveat of sorts: The titles and
thematic concerns are based only upon
what I've managed to glean from the
trade papers. Thus, they represent only
suggestions and may be modified or
withdrawn completely without notice to '
the public. -
The first movie IVe caught wind of
recently isn't due for release until later
next year. Its name is "A Cold Turkey
Thanksgiving." The story is about a guy
who gagged on a turkey bone when he
was but a youngster. The experience left
him with the convoluted desires to use a
chain saw, make everything red, and have
potatoes instead of Stove-Top Stuffing
any old day. Anyway, this guy then, in the
mood of the season, puts on a turkey cos
tume and bludgeons gluttonous, half
dressed teenagers with a drumstick.
Another film that I've heard hushed
whispers about is due to ccme out some
time this spring. It doesn't take too much
to guess its title: "Easter Bunny, Killer
Bunny." The theme song already has been
released as one of those great stocking
stuffers for the toddlers. I've discovered
that if you softly coo the song to your
children or younger brothers or sisters as
they go to sleep, you ensure the sweetest
of sweet dreams for them as they travel to
the land of Nod. Here it is:
''Here comes Peter Cotton Tail,
"Chasing you with a railroad nail,
"Hippity Hop - Hop
"Hippity - Hop - Hop
"He's as regular as the mail "
Obviously, talk of this being nominated
for an Oscar for best theme song already
is well advanced.
"Easter Bunny, Killer Bunny" is
recommended for children who can't yet
discern the difference between fiction
and reality. Their squeals of childish de
light mixed in with the gurgles of people
drowning in their own blood will be
thanks enodgh for taking them to this
movie.
There is also some talk of mixing the
new patriotic and neo-fascist genre, rep
resented best perhaps by the film "Read
Dawn," and the holiday-horror genre in a
delightful film entitled "Mayday, Mayday."
In this flick thousands of undead com
mies invade from Mexico stringing up
stoned teenagers on Maypoles and
bloodying their noses with overturned
May baskets.
However, the film "Mayday, May
day" is not just for family holiday fun it
is instructive as well. Indeed, it rather
definitively answers the hypothetical still
hanging from this last election year.
Namely, whether there really is a bear in
the woods. There is, Well see him in Ste
phen King's "Bearjo."
It is enough to say that our society
owes an inestimable debt to the visual
media industry. Holiday after holiday
these humble giants of American culture
unselfishly sacrifice mere profit in order
to bring the simple joys of random death
into the hearts and minds of American
children everywhere. All I can say is
thanks. Thanks a lot.
ill JC
Letters
Student support justifies
cable in residence halls
For more than a year now, cable televi
sion has been an issue for students living
in the residence halls. Last year all UNL
residents were polled on the cable TV.
issue, and wre discovered large support
for cable (of the surveys returned, almost
90 percent favored cable). This semester,
in a more scientific survey, 68.2 percent
said they wanted no unnecessary items
added to next year's rates.
At its Nov. 26th meeting, the Residence
Hall Association Senate held an open
forum to gather as much information as
possible and vote on whether to continue
fighting for cable in the halls. As chair
man of the rate study committee, I pro
posed that the senate approve the instal
lation of cable television and that the rate
study committee consider cable televi
sion in the budget for 1985 and 1986. In
the interest of keeping housing costs
competitive we rank seventh among
Big Eight schools in costs the proposal
requested that University Housing and
the rate study committee "insure that the
increase in the total housing rate is as low
as possible."
The senate approved the proposal by a
vote of 15-3. The senate's overwhelming
support for the cable proposal means
that if there is room for cable television in
next year's rate increase and if University
Housing can clear some legal hurdles,
there is a good possiblity that cable tele
vision will be included in next year's hous
ing budget. I am sure that if room and
board rates increase more than expected,
neither University Housing nor RHA will
want cable next year. I feel that if there is
enough leeway in next year's budget to
include cable without increasing the total
housing rate substantially or lowering
services, there now exists enough stu
dent support to make cable television in
the residence halls a reality.
1 Pete Castellano
RHA rate study chairman
T T H Daily v.
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CHAIRPERSONS
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tUeve Mayer
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Angela Mteifetd, 475-4M1
Don Walton, 473-7391
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