I
r
The Norfolk Netus
Tho next holtilny will lo the Aral
Monday In September which Is Lnlxir
day
An cxchnugo thinks lliu lints worn by
horses nro entitled to bo culled plug lints
whether they nro or not
It In likely thnt one of tho expensive
luxuries of tuxt winter will bo hot corn
brenil and soruhnm molasses
Tho hot weather though nnconifort
nblo linn been qnlto healthy very little
serious sickness being reported In Nor
folk mid vicinity Ktnnd up for Norfolk
unil Ncbrnskn
Tho people of Slonx City in thes
days of prosperity iindpnrboiled wenthor
are experiencing dllllcnlty in getting
girls to do tho housework it wages
rniiRlui from 1 oO to fft per week
Wnter consumers are pnyinK tho same
roles thnt they did boforo tho water
works wero owned by Jho city How
liuioh chenfr will electric Unlit be
when tho city owns a lighting plant
A innu named Alliert Znhrupchy
drowned in tho Missouri river ot Oninho
Wednesday afternoon Ho endeavored
to perjorm tho feat of carrying IiIh nnnie
from the center of tho stream to tho
dioro and failed
It is reported that tho Jim river in
South Dakota is out of ItH hanks If it
would but overllow in this direction or
if mhiio of that surplus water in Juno
could bo recovered tho peoplo would
linvo causo for rejoicing
The United Ftntcs produces but 2 ft
per cent of tho sugar of tho world and
yet its people continue -V per cent of
tho sugar produced in tho world Tills
gives evidence of largo fields for the
development of tho beet sugar industry
1
Whatcvor may bo said of UnclcSnms
lottery at Kl Heno it cannot bo said that
bo is making anything out of tho deal
no ohargo being mndo for n chance It
is undonltedly tho fairest method yet
conceived of disposing of goverumunt
lauds
George ICuiinnu tho author has been
ordered out of Hussio lucnuso Ho was
considered politically unreliable Amer
ican politicians will do well to pass
Bussio by They may know that Ken
nans fato would await uino out of ten
of them
A writer in tho Ladies lomo Journal
advises housekeepers to open nil the
windows nnd blinds and let tho sun nnd
nir pour through tho house Sho faiK
to explain how tho sun may bo obtained
and does not prove that it may bo poured
after it i secured
Seme of tho papers have figured It out
that tho dry and hot weather is a bless
ing to tho country in which case the
christian people should not pray for
rain but should implore for a continu
ance of tho drouth aud If one is go d
one each year should bo better
If n speculator is fortunate enough to
discover a Nobrusknu who is unnerved
by crop conditions and anxious to dis
pose of his property cheap it is his time
to make a ten strike This is an excep
tional year the laud is good aud will
grow crops OS years out of 100
By proclamation of President McKin
ley Porto Hlco now enjoy s tree trade
with the United States and is plnced
under civil government Perhaps the
democrats will now kick about the local
taxation to which tho people are sub
jected to carry on thoir government
It is estimated that the Colorado river
carries sullicieut water for tho irrigation
of 8000000 acres This isbut ouo of the
rivers in a largo territory which would
bo benefited by irrigation development
nnd tho possibilities of tho movement
can thereforo be scarcely comprehended
In case tho corn crop is a failure the
beet tops and beet pulp will be in de
maud for feed and growers of beets
should see to it thnt they derive every
possible advantnge from tho orop All
kinds of feed will be valuable aud the
long headed farmer will see thnt noth
ing which it is possible to feed goes to
waste
Pierro Lonllard was very evidently n
foxy old customer and it need not sur
prise nny of the users of his tobaccos to
learn thnt they were composed wholly of
cabbage A man who is cnpablo of fix
ing up a mock wedding and marrying
his mistress to his hired girl disguised
as a man is quite likely to sell cabbage
for tobacco
In view of the drouth with which the
country hns been alllicted those papers
thnt are devoting space on how to
fcerve melons should tell how to pro
cure melous when there nre none or
give a treatiso on how to successfully
overcome that gnawing melon appetite
without going baukrupt by purchasing
the inferior fruit obtainable
The Iowa militia boys have at least
attained distinction for a prompt obedi
ence of officers They were tossing a
corporal in a blanket and when he was
25 feet in the air an officer ordered them
--
-
to stop They stopped so suddenly thnt
tholr lotfiit fell to tho hnrd ground
breaking his collnr IkhKj mill rendering
him insensiblo The ofllrer If ho know
tholr prompt olK ilionco wns to blame
for not timing his orders better
It 1r now announced that Edward
will not be crowned king of England In
vlow of tho entiro populotloli that mny
congregnto but it will only bo witnessed
by tho peers of tho realm tho diploma
tic corps and tho fow who havo otllclal
reasons for obtaining seats All thoo
who havo been saving their money to go
to tho coronation may thereforo now
blow it In for lco
Those who nro sometimes tempted to
wnsli their feet shonld be warned not to
do so by tho example made of tho CSrand
Island man who took a ft ot bnth and died
tho next day Mnny of uh hnvo persist
ently believed that It whb a dangerous
operation to wash tho fett and now
nro thoroughly convinced If yon must
monkey with water iour It on the
parched lawn nnd garden
Tho populists have given up tho feat
of trying to deny prosperity and havo
suddenly discovered that tho nmson for
tho present prosperous conditions iH be
cause tho administration haH adopted
tho populist euro for hard times It
f would require several years of this hot
weather to render tho populists incapa
ble of maintaining an issue without ad
mitting error Thoir presumption
should bo embalmed for tho entertain
tnont of future generations
It is figured that an American is equal
as a consumer of homo and foreign pro
ducts to 10 other people of tho world in
general If this is a correct rating the
77010000 people of tho Uniied States
are equal to 770000000 or ono half tho
rest of tho world Certainly tho Amer
icans as a class live better than tho
people of any other nation on the globe
and time is proving that they can af
ford it Tho worlds wenlth is rapidly
conteriug in tho United Suites
Thero is a good profit in chickous ns
many farmers are learning A farmer
living near Humphrey is finding this
out but ho 1b not tho one who is profit
ing Ho gave his daughter two chickens
and promised to feed tho increaso for
four years if sho would look after thorn
Ho says tho girl now hns 0 1 in tho
bank and iO chickens which ho had to
feed last winter and believes that at tho
t nd nf the four years tho girl will own
tho fnrm and bo charging him rent
Referring to tho communication of
A Voter as tho writer understands
tho Fremont situation tho waterworks
made money for tho city beforo tho
electric light was established which
was put in largely from tho surplus in
tho water fund but since tho two plants
havo been run in connection tho revenue
from botli does not meot tho expenses
This scorns to bo about tho samo situa
tion as is here and if a new lighting
plant is put in all precedents will be
broken if tho two combibol como any
where near earning expenses
The stato fair management through
Its secretary Hobt W Furnas in ex
tending tho compliments of tho fair to
tho publishers of the state is exhibiting
a spirit that will bo appreciated by the
press Tho secretory says Thero an
no strings on these tickets They nre
good in the hands of any person present
ing them to the gnto koepers good at
tached or detached nnd on nny day of
tho fair This is quite a different
manner of dealing with tho press to
that frequently practiced by enterprises
seeking tho aid of tho publishers aud it
iB likely that tho fair management will
have no regret at the results of their
generosity
Tho department of agriculture wnuts
to add the distribution of trees to thnt
of seeds and it is a plan to bo com
mended especially in tho west The
trees thus distributed would undoubt
edly receivo more consideration than
seeds Many of tho seeds distributed
have been inferior and of little value to
tho recipients while nny kind of tree
would bo of value to a country needing
forest development There would prob
ably bo little complaint if trees were
substituted for seeds entirely ns fnr as
tho west is concerned Forests nnd
groves aro in moro domnnd than turnips
aud cabbage tho seed of which is read
ily obtainable by everyone
To fuso or not fuse is tho question
that is agitating the populists nnd dem
ocrats The result of thoir decision is
of little interest to the republicans
Tho latter party now consists of more
than half of the voters of tho stato aud
with fusion of the other two parties its
membership will increase whilo if they
decide to go it nloue mnny who havo
forsakeu the democratic or populist
parties on account of fusion will return
id their first love and tho republican
party will win until nn opponent strong
enough to defeat it develops from one
or the the other of these parties The
situation is therefore very satisfactory
to Die republicans and they can afford
to view the troubles of the f usiouistB
with complacency
The Chicago American would show a
much more commendable spirit of en
terprise if it would roa6t the South
TIIK NORFOLK 1VEAVS FRIDAY ATCHST 2 UI01
i im
fight faks tllan to lambast tho people
for -allow tug an exhibition in which It
describes men as being tossed in the air
by iufur4nti d bulls and tho animals be
ing dispatched by the nimblo footed
Mexicans for tho delectation of tho gov
ernor of tho stato and his staff In its
rench for the sensatlonnl tho American
hns woiked over time Kvoryono who
attended the fair will bo willing to
testify thnt for a gennlno simon pure
unadulterated fake the bull fights ad
vertised to tako place deservo first place
in tho procession Hooper Scutinelr
The Niws is not in tho habit of an
swering lnuendoes nnd slurs issued in
the form of postal cards and gutter suipts
by persons too cownrdly to sign their
nanus to their epistles It has no apol
ogies or explanations to mnko concern
ing its courto on tho bond proposition
It believed that tho principlo of tho city
ruining tho business Of a private enter
prise was wrong hence it opposed tho
issunnco of the bonds But while it
was opposod to the proposition it throw
its columns wide open to the free discus
sion or tno question and printed every
thing that wns offered on both sides
oven going to the expeuso of putting on
thrco extra compositors Saturday to
handle the communications thnt were
sent in covering tho issno Tho votes
show that a largo majority of the people
did not think as did Tub Niwb The
majority rules Now that tho question
is settled wo hopo that tho city govern
ment will meet with abundant success
in its new venture and that there will
never bo cause for regret nt tho nctlon
taken yesterday
These long distnnco agriculturalists
pretend to have an infinite knowledge
of crop conditions A recent editorial
in tho Chicago Itecord Ilernid asserts
that tho scare that is now running tho
price of corn up to sixty cents in
tho Chicago exchange is the result of
reports from tho semi arid region and
that tho condition of corn in tho corn
belt is far from a failure Tho writer
of tho article with superior wisdom
concludes that farmers who aro not in
tho corn belt should not attempt to
raise com If tho Ilecord IIorald in
sists on placing all localities thnt will
suffer a total or partial failure of the
com crop in tho semi arid region the
com belt will suiTorn material shrink
age and if all tho farmers who will ex
perience such failure will heed the
Hecord Heralds advico and not at
tempt to raiso corn tho prico is likely
to go to a dollar or two a bushel and re
niiiiu thero Tho portions of Missouri
Iown Kansas and Nebraska affected by
tho drouth havo added millions of
biiBhels each year to tho countrys coin
product and tho production this year
will bo millions of bushels less than
during other yeais However tho
farmers nro not likely to follow the
Chicago papers advico and aro not in
the least npprehensivo but that next
year tho crop will partially or wholly
make up for tho loss sustained this year
Tin Nrws has given freely of its
spieo today to a discussion of the elec
tric light bond proposition which is to
bo decided at a special election to be
held Monday Both sides of tho ques
tion aro represented as it is tho policy
of this paper that its columns shall al
ways bo open to a fair discussion of
public questions Thk Nkws believes
that tho bonds should be deiented be
cause it is not good business for the city
to put in a plant nor iB it fair to the
company already operating here to es
tablish a second lighting system It is
not good business for it has been dem
onstrated that it will cost moro to light
tho streets through tho medium of n
municipal plant thnn it will to nccept
tho proposition of tho local company to
furnish uny required number of lightsnt
JO per mouth each The city now has
a landed indebtedness of about 08000
while tho school district is in debt fJO
000 more which is as much as ought
to be carried at any one time
The Nkws believes in the municipal
ownership of certain enterprises but
when tho tnx payers of a city nro asked
to support on enterprise in competition
with its leading citizens n Benso of fair
ness puts the question in a different
light Norfolk voters aro abked to tax
themselves for tho purpose of building
and maintaining an olectrio light plant
when thero is such a plant already in ex
istence tho property of its citizens
Theso citizens provided tho bonds car
ried would bo compelled to pay their
share toward tho construction and
mainteunnco of n competing plnnt
forced to do so by those who have noth
ing to lose and little to gain If the
people wish to outer into competition
with the lighting company why not
start ni the telephone the newspaper or
the meat market business Or why not
open a bank or real estate exchaugt
With n proposition to buy the existing
plant at a reasonable price this objec
tion would bo overcome but when the
proposition is to establish a new and
distinct system it is n long ways from
fair treatment to those who havo their
money invested in the present plant
The waterworks plant wns pui chased
after being established by a private
company and no citizen hns rensooi to
complnin that it has become n munici
pal institution but if the city had started
an independent plaut even in
tionwith a foreign corporation a sense
of fairness would have forbid many tax
Omaha street fair promoters for the bull payers from supporting the movement
There is no fenr of
anything will brrn
Pnzzlo l iud Adlbi
name in todnys pnpers
a conl
Stevensons
Automatic farming might bo nil right
if these seemingly automatic drouths
cauld bo disnbltd
A show has been billed to appear in
Norfolk on the 13th but that in n long
time to wait for rain
The Sioux City Journnl thinks it
would bo easy enough to provide dogs
with shirt waists if there were some
way of buttoning them to the pants
Even Coxey has gone wrong Ho is
now chief stockholder in one of the big
steel plants nnd his army has been sent
tend to tho four corners of the enrth
The people of Columbia aro tnking n
considerable risk when they insult tho
German ling Thnt country not only
hns grent respect for the government
ensign but has tho ability to force re
spect from the people of othercountries
The Chicago Arm thnt bus invented nn
nuto mowcr for farmers should now ex
tend their sympathies to tho man with
n lawn nnd invent n machine that will
clip the grass while ho sits on the back
porch and iuhnles lemonndo through a
straw
A Michigan woman gavo her husband
ai sonic to weaken his arms so he
couldnt beat her Tho treatment
proved successful and mny become n
popular method of handling husbands
whos arms are too strong for tho com
fort of their wives
An Ohio man caught a chicken Eplit
it open and applied it to a wouud mado
by a rattlesnake bite Ho stands every
chance of recovery but his cure is not
likely to become popular There are
those who will insist thnt whisky is the
best nnd only cure
Tho Massachusetts young man with
an inclination to marry should havo no
difliculty in choosing a brido The cen
sus statistics are to the effect that tho
state has 70000 more females than
males Boston alone has 11000 more
females than males
If fanners and gardeners only had
some of that extra gulch water in stor
age to uso at this time they would be
benefited in a largo extent and this
is tho meat of tho irrigation question
to store tho superfluous water of tho
spring and utilize thnt which goes to
waste through the creek and river chan
nels It is a question that should inter
est every citizen of the west
Tho World Herald thinks whpn J
Sterling Morton writes about nrbori
cnlturo ho writes very sensibly but
when ho writes libout politics he is
senile Perhaps it is tho World lleralds
opinions that aro warped It usually
admires another paper that will agree
with it on matters of public improve
ments but cannot stand a difference of
opinion on political questions There
nro a whole lot of people in Nebraska
who consider Mr Morton sensible all
the time
Why So Mnny YonnR Men Fall
One trouble with many young men
who start out In business Is they try to
do too mnny things nt once says Het
ty Green
dont know
The result Is that they
as much ns they ought to
about any one thing nnd they natural
ly full Thetrouble with young men
who work on salaries Is that theyre
always afraid of doing more tlinu
theyre paid for They dont enter Into
their work with the right spirit To
get on and bo appreciated a young mnn
must do more than hes pnld to do
Wheu he does something that his em
ployer has not thought of he shows
that he Is valuable Men are always
willing to pay good salaries to people
who will think of things for them
The man who only carries out the
thoughts and ideas of another is noth
ing more than a mere tool Men who
enn be relied upon nro always In de
mand The scarcest thing In the world
today Is a thoroughly reliable mnn
The
The PciUonon PInenppIc
It is a notorious fnct says The Na
tional Druggist thnt tho pineapple In
considered the least healthy of all the
edible fruit of the tropics by those
who know anything of the mntter The
Juice of the green nnd growing plant
Is credited In Java the Philippines nnd
throughout the far east generally with
being a blood poison of a most deadly
nature It s said to be the substance
with which tho Malays poison their
krishes and daggers and Is also credit
ed with being the finger nnll poison
formerly In use among aboriginal Jav
anese wonen almost universally
These wom m formerly or some thir
ty odd years ago anil possibly do yet
cultivated n mill sometimes more on
each hand to a long sharp point nnd
the least scratch from one of theso
was certain death
A trunrr AliuloKy
How many cranks live in this street
besides yourself
Thats nil Insult sir
Ob well I apologize How many
nrnril si Hvn In tills Ktrppt lnoliHllni
yourself Baltimore World
A Doom
The undertaker Is very Jolly this
morning
Yes Three hundred new doctors
were graduated last night Hnrlem
Life
LEARNING A TRADE
DntiKcr of MnUlnc n
tit it HeKlnner
Specialist
It Is generally to the Interest of nn
p nployw tmt nn apprentice should not
lent n his trade ns n whole but only a
little section of It says Joseph Homer
In Casslers Magazine It pays better
to keep n lad repeating the perform
mice of one section of Ills craft than
to teach him all More money Is made
Hut the apprentice becomes n young
specialist n pilg In bis teens cocksure
over some llttl piece of handicraft at
which he mny earn something over his
normal wages and many a hid does
not become disillusioned until he hns to
face tho world and try IiIh luck In
other shops
And therefore tho best shops in
which to place a lad are not the big es
tablishments but the small ones where
every class of work Is done and where
tools and nppllnnces are often scant
A lud will learn more in these than In
those replete with every appliance and
minutely subdivided Into sections nnd
groups
The best training for n lntl todny Is
that which he can evolve for himself
The greatest evil that can befall him
Ik to become a specialist and nothing
more while In his teens Yet that Is
what must happen If he spends several
years tending machines or doing re
petitive unvarying tasks In one big es
tablishment
The best training therefore today Is
that gathered by the peripatetic youth
if a lad cannot gain experience in one
place lie should move about gathering
as much as he can accunrulate with
one firm then on to another and at
tending training schools as opportunity
offers Ills views become broadened
he becomes self reliant and In time
having found his true work he may
settle down as a specialist
DRESS UP FOR SUICIDE
Satil to He nn In nrlnlilc Ilnlc With
Women Dentil
If I should ever be called upon to
furnish indisputable proof of the In
herent pride of womnn said n police
sergeant I would point at once to her
Invariable rule of dressing up In her
best clothes when she goes out to com
mit suicide In my experience on the
force 1 have bad occasion to handle a
gqod many suicides and afterward in
vestigate their personal affairs and In
every Instance I have round Mint tlie
poor unfortunates prepared themselves
for death by donning their best bib and
tucker
The majority of the printed reports
of suicides say that the clothes of the
dead woman were good or well made
or elegant If the woman contemplat
ing suicide owns a silk waist she
weirs It Her broadcloth skirt and silk
petticoat naturally go with this gar
ment anil she selects her best shoes
I have looked up tho history of
many of these respectably clad suicides
nnd have found that they owned but
one gown with which they could make
n decent appearance on the street and
that that one good dres was chosen
without exception as the appropriate
garb in which to make the exit from
this worlds stage It mnkes no differ
ence what manner of death is chosen
the costume Is carefully selected
Let a woman sleep her life away un
der the influence of drugs or burn her
soul out with acids or sink Into the
slime of the river she clothes herself in
her most becoming garments and seeks
the end with apparent tranquillity
Her Instinct of gentility nnd elegance
In clothes Is with her to the last and
even in the face of death she shrinks
from n public appearance In unbecom
ing raiment New York Sun
IIIkIi Monntnlnn of the Moon
The Leibnitz range attains enormous
altitudes above the average level of the
moons slirface and Is sometimes seen
projected far beyond the regular curva
ture of disk thus destroying the circu
lar contour nnd giving it a notched or
serrated aspect Several of the peaks
of these southern mountnlns measure
30000 feet In altitude while one has
been estimated to attain tho great
height of 30000 feet All the chief
mountains of the moon which can be
seen from tho earth with a telescope
hnve had their heights ascertained The
German observers Beer and Maedler
have calculated the height of no fewer
than 1005 lunar mountains The Do
rlel mountains supply an Instnnce of
great elevation the peaks of the three
leading ones being between 2000 and
20000 feet high Among other lunar
peaks may be mentioned Iluyghens
21000 feet Iladley irO00 feet Brad
ley 13000 feet and Wolf 11000 feet
RmliiilnilnK
Practically says an undertaker
quoted by the Philadelphia Hecord
every corpse nowadays Is embalmed
Perhaps not one body In a hundred Is
buried without having thejlutd Inject
ed and that settles it Youwont rend
your obituary notices then People
nre coming to rcnllze this more and
more and the old dread of being burled
nlive Is fnst dying out But these
nervous Individuals have got to have
some soil of post mortem bugaboo to
worry them If It Isnt one thing its
another and as soon as you convince
them that they nro not going to be
burled nllve they get grave robbers on
the brain Thats why we nre now
mnklng n specialty of burglar proof
caskets Fact 1 assure you
Altaolnte Zero
Absolute zero Is the point nt which
ns has been determined from experi
ments with gases matter would be
without a trace of heat could be cooler
no farther This point Is 273 degrees
below ceutlgrade zero A degree of
cold so Intense ns this Is however
unobtainable Even the meteorites
which swarm In Interstellar space must
be heated to some extent by the radi
ance of the stars
An Amcrlenn Dinner Inrtr
Hero Is Clement Scotts picture of an
American dlni r party You arc no
sooner indict vl Into the reception room
than you feel nt home In half a second
Conversation Is gone til and nulinated
Your hctcss I teulnl uraclousjxnd an
artist In Uie difficult ceremony of In
troduction The room and the nttnos
jihert beam with friendliness Intro
duced to your dinner companion sho Is
determined that joii and your partner
shall be friends nt once You hnve not
to make conversation She mnkes it
for you If you know anything bIio
winding It out of you In double quick
time and you have some difliculty In
holding your own against her readi
ness wit and sly cynicism She can
discuss everything nnd knows some
thing about all she discusses but with
out pedantry or affectation She has
the art of appearing to like you and bo
Interested In you whether she Is or not
This mny be humbug but It Is delight
ful humbug all the same
The elements of flirtation are never
to be despised by man or woman of
any age This social art Is generally
Ignored In England and that Is why
Anierlcnu women arc so supremely
popular And what Is the consequence
You go home from a dinner party lir
England tired and bored to death or
wander off to your club to try to for
get It nil You go home from an Amer
ican dluner party exhilarated a uttio
proud of yourself nnd saying sincerely
It hns been a jolly and delightful even
ing At least that Is what I have felt
i whenever I havo been honored with nil
invitation In Now York San
co
rgotinut
Humanity In Tnrkcyi
Theres a good deal of liuninn nature
In a turkey said a farmer The oth
er day while I was settln in the barn
door one of my turkeys come yerklu
nlong and peekln right nnd left nnd
finally spied a rag on tho ground that
every turkey had been travelln over for
a week Turkey picked It up and slatted
It out Thnt minute every turkey lu
the j ard started for him lie run It
evidently struck him nil of a sudden
thnt be had got hold of suthlu that was
mighty valuable He run nnd ho
dodged and he ducked and be run
some more Every few minutes some
oue of them turkeys would get him by
the wattles or ele by the rag and
there would be a tug of war And at
last another turkey got the rag away
nnd then thero wns another chase
Guess them darn fool turkeys would
havo been runnln tho fat off them
selves the next day If 1 hadnt set tho
dog on bin
Thats Just tho way with a turkey
Let any other one In the flock get hold
of suthln nnd every one of the blamed
fools will start for him or her and run
till they fairly drop
And as I have said there is a good
deal of human nature right there
Lewiston Journal
A Dinner of Mule ninl Axle Grcnse
The following Is an incident of the
siege of Lndysmlth narrated by Sir
William MncCormnc An olllcer re
lated an incident which will servo to
illustrate the lengths to which things
had gone as regards food A shell fell
into the mule lines one afternoon kill
lug one mule In spite of other shells
following the first oue in rapid succes
sion so ns to make occupation of tho
spot very dangerous the men in tho
vicinity made a rush at the mule Hko
so many ravenous creatures cutting off
the flesh with their clasp knives In
great chunks They then in safer quar
ters built fires toasted the meat and
swallowed it at once To make them
more palatable the men fried their bis
cuits lu the nxle grease provided for
the carts The want of fatty foods
and vegetables was greatly felt In
spite of all their hardships nobody ever
thought of giving In The general In
quired ns to how many horses In tho
enmp could carry their riders six miles
In view of n sortie being made nnd the
answer came back that only 12 horses
In the whole camp could do It Lon
don Lancet
Jnn Whnt He Needed
An Invalid called on a physician for
advice The doctor wrote out a pre
scription charging the patleut 2 guin
eas for It Some time afterward they
met In the street
Well said the doctor you aro
looking 100 per cent better That medi
cine though a little expensive was
Just whnt you needed
Doctor replied tho patient after
I had paid you the 2 guineas for tho
prescription I couldnt afford to havo
It mado up so I didnt take a single
dose Loudon Answers
The EiikIUTi Way
Fights nre a recognized part of tho
school education nmong tho boys lu
England In America when boys light
it Is because they are angry with each
other in England they fight becauso
they nre anxious to find out which Is
the better mnn physically They may
have uo quarrel or 111 feeling but if
their friends cannot agree as to their
respective prowess the ultlmato result
Is pretty apt to bo a mill Self Cul
ture
Not a Warm Onrmrnt
I cant find words exclaimed the
moral mau to express my disgust for
the man who uses his religion as a
cloak Hes everything thats bad
He certainly Is foolish to say the
least remarked tho practlcnl man
for religion such ns his is necessarily
so flimsy hes liable to catch cold In It
Philadelphia Press
Chrclc to Frivolity
The Chinese minister says the cos
tumes worn by American women strike
him ns being In some respects ridicu
lous said Mrs Blyklns
Yes answered Mr Blyklns Thats
owing to his point of view If be bad
to pay for a few of them hed soon
learn to take them seriously Wash
ington Star
sk