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SUCCESSOR- TO
OHKRRY COUNTY INDEPENDENT
ROBERT B GOOD - Editor Prop
VALENTINE
-
NEBRASKA
Value the frimdshlp of him who
Btands by you in the storm swarms of
Insects will surround you in sunshine
A -Virginia woman named Susan
Smith has been elected sheriff It is
pretty safe to wager that when she is
sues an attachment she will get the
man she goes after
According to the naturalists there are
366000 distinct species of animals liv
ing at the present time The mammals
number 2500 birds 12500 fishes 12000
mollusks 50000 and insects 230000
A Kentucky scientist -claims to have
een a spot on the sun GS000 miles long
He probably can see equally queer
things also -by looting at the moon It
all depends on the glass -that is used
It 5s aiot what -we -read but what we
remember that makes us learned It is
not what we intend but what we do
that makes us useful It is -not a few
faint wishes but a lifelong -struggle
that makes us valiant
Chicago Times Herald A Missouri
man has just been -sentenced to the peri
itentiary for 102years Missouri would
get along much better -if she would not
bunch her hits like Jthat four rascals
in the -penitentiary ttwenty five years
apiece beat one sent up fora -century
There 5is more heroism in the youtL
who resigns his dreamsof ambition and
-of distinguish
refuses the opportunity
ing himself because an -aged parent or
dependent brothers and sisters need his
presence than in one whogoes onward
reaping triumph and fame at every
tep
Prize lEighter Duffy whodied inithe
ring is said to have succumbed -to
overexcitement due rto enlargement of
the heart Close observers have
ed that nothing tends to increase ones
excitement more thantopoundhim vio i
ilently overithe heart -whether it
or not
That the gentler sexls fastbecoming
emancipated is shojwnbythefact that
In 1896 there were in the United States
hirty ftwo women woodchoppers 147
bartenders itwenty f our hostlers
-sailors four locomotive engin
eers twenty three plasterers fifty nine
blacksmiths and six boilerTmdkers
A real live English lord calling ihim
selfLord Cyril Athol hasbeenarrested
in Oakland Cak for the larceny -of a
horse buggy and harness There Is no
accounting for tastes butiif Mr Athoh
had appropriated a burro -there -would
be a near approach to family astute
ness and the brain power -supposed to
belong to British nobility -
Scattered brains poetic or -otherwise
make poor janitors fortheihome
and the high flown idealitiesifloless for
comfort good living and fair repute
rthan do the commonplace virtues Ap
pearances have to be studied
hasitobe considered punctuality
imust be provMed for and the Opinions
of others must be at the leastireepected
ilf not always followed
The high theater hat ordinanceseems
tto be a cruel piece of legislation any
way If a lady happens1 to beibald or
wears a wig oris prematurely turning
gray there ismo better waytodisguise
ithe fact than iby covering such defects
by a tall hatnnllthe unfortunate wom
an ought to liave the right tosdoiit Of
coarse if there lis no reason lor wear
iing an eclipshigtobstruction no thought
if ill -woman will do so
SBurglars ace the great tertror or
Mnie Pattis lient iCastle
andshe has had ail the window rshut
iters fitted wMh electric bells Whiek
6tart ringing -at stiie slightest itauch
w hitetby the sarnie nasachinery ajguniis
firedand a numbtQr0 dogs are let -loose
in the grounds vwe irre calmly trdlfl in
GasseHfe Saturday Journal Special
watch mm are tctUl off every nigM on
ountfduty itiisrnfliaed
Sir Eft ward Wfirymper the airtea
mountain climber Jaas Qarried the
enstockfQt more tfeuitthjcty years and
the
horo beshlcs hundresoti lesser peas
land ithoih he has Ihnii jiumberless
thriUiEg advenutres taelmiing a faSi
of COO eetJe never fractured a limfc
or sustained -any serioas injury He
did however rtumble djywna flight o
stairs in England and ficactured his
oollar boe
It is all right to put ample eoqdenvee
-in an employe wjiose life presents ai
record of fyrobity because It eneour
ages zeal ad inspires energy But
when it takes the f crm of actual care
lessness the is to incite job
bery and the culmination is loss 9f
money on one side and of chaactor
on the other A duty cf the employer
is to maintain ai all times a keen scru
tiny into the affirs of te firm Em
ploy srs Vho fulfill tthis obligation rarely
nuu iua xiuui ujyjuonest employes
New Jork is actuallj frightened over
the dimiiishing proportions of her ex
port graSp trade and the trunk lines
are about to take a hand in its restora
tion As tP its contentions with Balti
jnore and -Philadelphia the TVest scares
but little vt the trnns Mississfnni
Bt JX -
Commerce Is certain to find the shortest
route to tide water and thisls the route
to the Gulf from the States which lie
west of the Missouri
There is no better illustration of the
progress made by Egypt under British
supervision than the transformation of
Port Said A few years ago it was the
most vile and repulsive town of the Le
vant To day it is connected by rail
with Ismailia Cairo and Suez abun
dantly provided with fresh water in
tersected in every direction by broad
streets lined with attractive and im
posing shops while big hotels con
ducted on the best lines have taken
the place of all the low cafes and res
taurants which formerly abounded In
one word all the disreputable features
which formerly contributed to render
the place the plague spot of the Medi
terranean have disappeared and to day
Port Said bears an aspect of dignity
prosperity and above all of respecta
bility
The relations between the French
Legislature and the French navy are
consideraTJly strained at the present
moment The other day during the dis
cussion of the naval budgef some of
the radical politicians held up to ob l
loquy Admiral Duperre the senior of 1
ficer of the service for having during
the war of 1870 respected his word of
honor not to take any further part in
the confliot after having been released
on parole the speakers holding that
considerations of patriotism took pre
cedence of those of honor The Minis
ter of Marine thereupon in an impas
sioned intimated -to the
speech mem
bers of the Chamber of Deputies that
they were not capable of understand
ing or appreciating the conceptions and
ideas of a French officer with regard to
honor and to the value of a plighted
word
According to the San Franciscu
Chronicle the children of the late Jas
GlFair arelikely to be confronted with
the unpleasant news shortly that their
inheritance has been heavily overval
ued The -truth of the matter is that
tthe Fair estate has depreciated in value
since the death of the man who made
it To day it israot worth over 15000
000 and if put under the hammer
those conversant with the real condi
tion of affairs say it would not bring
12i000000 and possibly very little over
10000000 If this is the case Fair
instead of being the richest of the bo
nanza kings died the poorest Mackay
to day is worth 40000000 James L
Flood died worth 20000000 OBrien
had nearly as much to leave while the
man who was the commanding genius
that paved the way to the gigantic
wealth these four amassed in the end
was outclassed in the race Should the
trust be knocked out the direct heirs
will receive about 3505000 apiece
The Army and Navy G azette calls
attention to a -remarkable feature of
the Queens reign the enormous num
iber of wars little and big that hava
i marked its progress Scarcely a
jtwelvemonth of this period has passed
jindeed without finding England at war
in some part of the world Here is a
ilistof the principal -campaigns and ex
peditions Afghan war 183S 40 first
China war 1841 Sikh war 1845 46
Kaffir war 1S46 -second war with Chi
ma second Afghan war 1849 second
Sikh war 184S 49 Burmese war 1850
second Kaffir warHS51 52 second Bur
mese war 1S52 153 Crimea 1854 third
war with China US56 5S Indian mu
tiny 1S57 Maori war 1S60 61 more
wars with China 3860 and 1S62 second
Maori war 1S63 66 A shanti war 1S64
war in Bhootan Abyssinian war
1S676S war with the Bazootees 186S
third Maori war 086S69 war with
Looshais 1S71 second Ashanti war
1S73 T4 third Kaffir war 1877 Zulu
war 1S7S 79 third Afghan Avar 1S7S
S0 Avar in Basutoland 1879 S1 Trans
vaal war 1S79 S1 Egyptian wsr 1SS2
Soudan third Burma war
2LSS5 92 Banzibar 189ft India 1S90
Matabele wars 1S94 and Chitral
campaign lbJb second boudan
inaign 1S96
iGhicago with a population jratlicred
from nearly every portion of the globe
is a city of many surprises and sensa
tions especially in Hie matrimonial
line dne of the recent legal cases in
that city is a suit for 2Jv0Q brought by
a ireal estate man against a former
friend for introducing him to a widow
said to be worth 500000 and whom
ihe subsequently married The now
prosecuted husband admits that he
signed -ft note agreeing to pay the real
Restate iman 2500 should a marriage
fcQlow tae introduction and to show
rfchfct us a loverJlie was active virilanL
ibrawe and succssful it may be only
aiecessaryto add that the uiai afiage fol
lowed one month and five days from
tike dttte Of the introduction Tke
texcu5e for row refusing to pay
is that he icoked ispon the note as a
jfce He ditl not imagine that the real
s4ate uwan Wjis in earnest in demand
ing a tejevet dowry Moreover he
claims that he did all courting -and
that demanding pay for an introduction
is blackmail The kitchen or tlie
imarriage torokqr is a lleognized fea
aire in jsome portions of Europe Bvt
iti the CMeago case the parties at oddr
are Americans and cannot plead the
customs of thejr former home And as
jfree and independent Americans pub
lic sympathy will be with the man who
tfn the widow To demand pay for
lncoducng couples who might possibly
niajsry is striking a blow at the court
ship business and inay deerease the re
ceipts f the Marriage License Bureau
BegfJs bis wife advises Isim not to
pay
States have turjfid their traffic toward A new VKoano which is emitting
New Orpins anjT Galveston and whafc i mense quanifcties of smoke lava and
JNew York has 1qs from those grain fire has been discovered at Jalcotiua
JfiKwJnS gJflt M wiU never regain Mexico
GAGE IN THE CABINET
HE
ACCEPTS THE
SHIP
TREASURY
1
President of the First National Bank
of Chicago Announces that He Has
Taken a Portfolio in the New Ad
ministration
Done at Canton
Lyman J Gage president of the First
National Bank of Chicago has accepted
the portfolio of Secretary of the Treasury
under the McKinley administration He
made that announcement at Canton O
Thursday night in the McKinley library
There were gathered about him a number
of newspaper correspondents who had
come to learn of the result of the confer
ence with Maj McKinley
Mr Mclvinley offered me the treasury
portfolio I told him I would accept the
high honor and fill the position to the best
of my ability
This was the first utterance of the in
coming Secretary of the Treasury on be
ing presented to the party Beyond this
he had little to say He declined to dis
cuss any feature of the policy of the in
coming administration or to discuss any
matter other than that relating to him-
mS
LYMAN J GAGE
self He said there was no ground for
the publication that he was a gold Demo
crat during the campaign and that his
only affiliation with the Democratic party
was in 18S4 when he voted for Cleveland
He also said that he and Major McKin
ley substantially agree on the tariff ques
tion
The guests at the McKinley residence
besides Mr Gage were National Commit
teeman Leland of Kansas ex GoV Cor
nell and Col J J McCook of New York
the latter a leading attorney W C Beer
of the National Security Company of New
York and Gen Osborne the secretary of
the national committee Gov Cornell said
that he was glad the country was to have
a Secretary of the Treasury who will have
learned his trade before he enters upon
the duties of his office
Biographical Sketch of Mr Gage
Lyman J Gage was born at De Ruyter
Madison County N Y June 28 1836
and was the son of Eli and Mary Judson
Gage Heearned his first salary as a
clerk in the postoffice at Rome N Y and
later became route agent on the Rome and
Waterown Railroad In 1S54 he was giv
en a position in the Oneida Central Bank
in Rome and retained it for a year and a
half at a salary of S100 a year The close
of 1S55 found him in Chicago and his
first employment was in the capacity of a
bookkeeper for a lumber firm In connec
tion with his duties as bookkeeper he
was also required to assist in loading and
unloading lumber wagons He afterwards
accepted the position of bookkeeper for
the Merchants Savings Loan and Trust
Company and this was the beginning of
the career that led up to his presidency of
the First National Bank In the spring of
1SG0 he had reached the position of assist
ant cashier and shortly afterward was
advanced to that of cashier and when in
1S6S he went to the First National Bank
it was as cashier The old charter of the
bank expired in 1SS2 and at the reorgan
ization he was elected vice president ancf
general manager About this time he was
elected to the presidency of the American
Bankers Association Ho was chosen
president of the First National Bank Jan
24 1S91 and has held that position since
Mr Gage was a moving spirit in the
Worlds Fair enterprise from the time il
was first proposed and he demonstrated
his faith in Chicagos ability to manage
the affair and meet its obligations by be
ing one with three others to guarantee
fchat Chicago would raise the 10000000
promised Mr Gage has been twice mar
ried first in 1864 to Miss Sarah Ether
idge of Little Falls N Y She died in
1874 and in 1SS7 he married Cornelia
Gage of Denver Colo
HER INAUGURATION GOWN
Mrs McKinleys Costume of Silve
and White Brocade
Details of the inauguration gown of
Mrs McKinley have finally been decided
says a Chicago correspondent The ma
terial for the gown has been selected but
not cut from the piece It is a brocade of
silver and white the combination produc
ing a sort of grayish color It will be
lined with pale blue satin The gown is
rto be made rather plain The corsage will
Slave a fluffy fischu of point dAlencon
lace Though the neck will be made high
wiith soft lace yet it will have the decol
lete effect because of the dAlencon
fisehu The sleeves will be long and fin
ished with a full frill of lace The skirt
witfe its stately train is to have several
panels of handsome brocade The idea
Ib to feave the gown not elaborate and at
the sasae time rich in effect This is one
of eight gowns which Mrs McKinley will
have fitted during her stay in Chicago
Interest centers in the inauguration outfit
and the details of the other dresses have
not been felly decided
Miss Lillian Templeton of Brooklynifl
dead as the result of taking a prescrip
tion of a friend who meant to cure her
Miss Templeton had been Buffering from
a cold A friend gave her a prescriptions
which called tor equal parts of spirits of
camphor peppermint laudanum and bal
sam of fir
Chief of Police Crowley of San Fran
cisco is determined that if the Chinese
residents in that city will not regard the
laws of the State they shall forfeit all
the privileges heretofore granted to them
bense of their native cugtomg
W0EK OF CONGRESS
THEjWEEKS DOINGS IN SENATE
AND HOUSE
A Comprehensive Digest of the Pro
ceedings in the Legislative Cham
bers at Washington Matters that
Concern the People
Lawmakers at Labor
In the Senate Tuesday Cuba the pro
posed international monetary conference
and the Nicaragua canal each came in
for a share of attention The Wolcott
bill for an international monetary con
ference was considered for the first time
No final action on the bill was taken The
House amendmentsto the Senate bill for
a survey of a water route from the mouth
of the jetties at Galveston Tex to Hous
ton were agreed to and the bill finally
passed The House overrode another of
President Clevelands pension vetoes by
a vote of 137 to 52 The bill pensioned
Jonathan Scott of the Sixth Iowa cavalry
now living at Oswego Kan at the rate
of 72 a month Mr Cleveland vetoed it
on the ground that the disability for
which the beneficiary was to be pensioned
was not contracted in the service The
rest of the day was devoted to a continu
ation of the debate on the Indian appro
priation bill About twenty five pages
of the bill were covered A bill to satisfy
a peculiar claim was passed on motion of
Mr Turner DemJ of Georgia It was
the claim of John F McRae a deputy
United States marshal for keeping thirty
six African slaves landed by the ship
Wanderer at Savannah Ga in 1S59 un
til they could be shipped back to their
homes in accordance with the provisions
of the laws for the suppression of the
slave traffic The amount was S4G2
A crisis in the debate in the Nicaragua
canal bill was reached in the Senate Wed
nesday It brought out an energetic state
ment from Senator Sherman in which he
foreshadowed a new treaty by which the
United States could build the canal with
out the intermediation of a private conces
sion The Senator declared that this gov
ernmental execution of the project was
the only feasible one and that all private
efforts in that direction had proved fail
ures Answering Mr Morgans recent
charge that England inspired opposition
to American control of the canal Mr
Sherman asserted that this was a buga
boo wholly without foundation He
added a handsome tribute to England and
her institutions The House adopted the
conference report on the immigration bill
by a vote of 131 to 118 The principal
criticism of the measure agreed on by the
conferees in debate was based upon the
extension of the educational test to fe
male as well as male immigrants on the
ground that it might divide families and
to the limitation to the ability of an im
migrant to read and write the English lan
guage or the language of their native
country or resfdence Mr Hepburn Rep
Iowa closed the debate in support of the
report When he declared that hundreds
of thousands of American laborers were
to day walking the streets of the great
cities because they had been crowded out
by the incoming stream of aliens the pub
tic galleries of the House fairly shook with
acclaim
The House passed the Indian appropria
tion bill Thursday and entered upon the
consideration of the agricultural appro
priation bill but all interest in these two
measures was overshadowed by two -remarkable
speeches one made by Mr
venor of Ohio attacking ex Gov Altgeld
of Illinois and the other by Mr Dear
tnond of Missouri heaping ridicule on Sec
retary Morton for the recent issue of a
pamphlet entitled The Farmers Inter
est in Finance Mr Grosvenors obser
vations on the Governor of Illinois were
called forth by the latters recent speech
in which he charged that Mr Bryan had
been defeated by fraud and based his
charge particularly on the enormous in
crease of the vote in Ohio where he al
leged 90000 votes were illegally cast
Mr Grosvenor analyzed the Ohio vote
and explained the causes of its increase
calling attention to the fact that the Dem
ocratic vote in the State had increased
proportionately much more than the Re
publican The Senate by a vote of 41 to
15 confirmed tho nomination of William
S Forman of Illinois to be Commissioner
of Internal Revenue Senator Cullom
presented to the Senate a number of let-
ters and memorials he had received from
Chicago business firms asking for the pas
sage of the Torrey bankruptcy bill
By the decisive vote of 4G lo 4 the Sen
ate Friday passed the bill for the appoint
ment of commissioners to an international
money conference The bill as passed is
as follows
Whenever after March 4 1S97 the
President of the United States shall de
termine that the United States should be
represented at any international confer
ence called by the United States or any
other country with a view to securing by
international agreement a fixity of rela
tive value between gold and silver as
money by means of a common ratio be
tween these metals with free mintage a
such ratio he is hereby authorized to ap
point five or more commissioners to such
international conference and for com
pensation of said commissioners and for
all reasonable expenses connected there
with to be approved by the Secretary of
State including the proportion to be paid
by the United States of the joint expenses
of any such conference the sum of S100
000 or so much thereof as may be neces
sary is hereby appropriated
The President of the United States is
hereby authorized in the name of the
Government of the United States to call
in his discretion such international con
ference to assemble at such points as may
be agreed upon
The House witnessed another sensation
al episode At the end of an acrimonious
debate on the conference report on the
bill to confer the rights and franchises of
the Atlantic and Pacific Railroad on the
purchasers under the mortgage foreclos
ure Mr Powers of Vermont and Mr Bar
rett of Massachusetts exchanged broad
sides
Telegraphic Brevities
Three different sections of Texas ex
perienced their first snowstorm for three
years
Secretary and Mrs Carlisle gave a din
ner in Washington to President and Mrs
Cleveland
The New York Board of Health has
placed pulmonary tuberculosis on the lisr
of infectious diseases
The mother brother and sister of Ar
thur Paimer of fcw York all of whom
he shot TP 3ea Palmer cannot be
found
f
kss
Wealth and Poverty
In the matter of feeding the poor the
time has come for action Quit playing
the hypocrite Do something Chicago
Dispatch
Russell Sage says that the poor are not
growing poorer and ofcourse he has ex
ceptional facilities for knowing Wash
ington Times
It is the rich misers and skinflints rath
er than the Bradley Martins and their ilk
who awaken popular criticism and con
tempt Boston Herald
The weather is pinching the needs of
the poor are felt severely the efforts of
charity ought to be manifested quickly
and intelligently Chicago Inter Ocean
The wretches who have cornered grain
in starving India deserve the execration
of the civilized world There is no op
portunity that greed will not seize upon
St Louis Post Dispatch
By giving a lavish ball the Bradley
Martins will put a great deal of money in
circulation but so they would do if they
devoted the same amount of money to a
better use New York Journal
If some of the very wealthy Chicagoese
would devote to charity a part of the
money they have been enabled to keep
by tax dodging it would make a great
fund for Chicagos S000 starving fami
lies St Louis Post Dispatch
Mr Russell Sages opinion that a social
entertainment that costs 240000 is a
wicked waste of money is one whose sin
cerity cannot be questioned although its
expression can hardly be set down as one
of the surprises of the season Washing
ton Star
A cry for help comes from Chicago It
is said that S000 families in that city are
actually starving to death The dispatches
say that the city has 10000 wives hus
bands and children begging for bread
begging for a pittance of food to keep
body and soul together huddled into sin
gle rooms and freezing in the blizzard
that visited the city Thursday It has a
mightier cry for pity than it had at the
close of the Worlds Fair Fall River
News
Bantering the Britishers
Henry Irving has a sprained ankle It
is said to decidedly improve his walk
Cleveland Plain Dealer
Doubtless the Prince of Wales thinks
the Queen is old enough to abdicate if she
wants to New York Press
Great Britain does not seem to be keep
ing up the standard of its work as nurse
to the Indian Empire Chicago Record
It is now rumored that the Prince of
Wales will be the leading candidate for
the head of the waiters union Chicago
Journal
It costs Great Britain S15000 a year to
maintain the Queens pack of deerhounds
We thus see that a good deal of British
gold is going to the dogs Commercial Ad
vertiser
The chances are that Lord Kimberley
who succeeds Lord Rosebery as the Lib
eral leader will resemble his predecessor
by not setting the Thames on fire Bos
ton Herald
Englands surplus this year might be
expressed in pounds sterling but the prac
tical way to put it is that it amounts to
four more new battleships St Louis
Globe Democrat
The Queens speech had a good deal
more to say about arbitration than about
unjust taxation in Ireland but Lord Cas
tletown and sundry others will see to it
that the latter subject is enforced upon
Parliaments attention Boston Globe
Lord Salisbury announced to the mem
bers of the House of Lords that if the
massacres in Turkey continued pressure
would have to be applied And yet some
critics insist that the official British mind
is impervious to humor Baltimore Amer
ican
Tacklinir the Treaty
The Senators who let loose the dogs of
war before adjournment will find most of
theni in the Olney pound Cleveland
Plain Dealer
We are ready and anxious to arbitrate
any subject of dispute with the English
except the cut of the amorphous horrors
they call trousers Kansas City Times
When England rejoices over the accept
ance of a treaty to which she is a party
it is always safe to infer that the other
party has the short end of it Detroit
Tribune
While there is some disposition among
American statesmen to criticise the arbi
tration treaty a unanimity of sentiment is
reported from the other side Buffalo
Express
It is not surprising that the Senate
should hang up the arbitration treaty
Anything the Senate might do would not
be surprising unless it should happen to
do something sensible Galveston Trib
une
The latest attack upon the treaty just
made with England will not be able to rob
that instrument of the title it has earned
as the crowning diplomatic triumph of
the century Cincinnati Commercial
No treaty can cover a question of na
tional honor War is the only arbiter of
that And Great Britain is likely to be
quite as quick on the trigger and quite
as careful not to offend as we can be
New York Press
Senate and Senators
Senator Mills of Texas is still going
about with an all-hell-shall-stir-for-this
look exposed on his face Memphis Ap
peal
Senator Tillman says he would like to
have Author of the Dispensary Law
carved on his tombstone but he doesnt
say when New York Press
About all that will be remembered of the
Hon J Don Cameron when he closes his
twenty year term in the Senate will be his
illustrious father Chicago Tribune
Senator Sherman seems to be trimming
his Cuban corns to the exact limits of the
Olney shoes Cleveland Plain Dealer
Senator Thurston says There are
things that are worse than war He
talks like a man who has been inveigled
into attending the afternoon session of a
sewing circle Chicago Times Herald
If any of those commiserating Wash
ington correspondents who express sorrow
over John Shermans decadent mentality
desire to change their opinion let them
engage the old man in a horse trade or a
real estate transaction Kaunas City
Times
AN ELECTROCUTION
Related by an Inmate of the Ohio
State Penitentiary
The followingVIs told by the Ohio
Penitentiary New written by ann jp
mate who signs himself C YerlateJT
In front of the electric light station
an old white horse was electrocuted on
Tuesday evening in the presence of thfr
Warden the Board of Managers and
other officials to test the deadly ap
paratus Reporters were present in
force and a number of medical men
came upon invitation The old equine
frame for he was little else was the
most unconcerned member of the gath
ering He beheld the preparations for
his sudden demise with philosophical
equanimity and just before the fatal
bolt penetrated his vitals hehad a look
of grim humor about his hoary old head
that concentrated its expression about
the bit worn curves of bis mouth and
the white hairs of his nose One might
almost have said that he smiled in quiet
derision upon the crowd As plainly as
words that hanging lip denoted sar
casmand might have said Gentlemen
I have had a long and weary life of it
If I Were to think of The kicks I have
suffered the pangs of hunger I have
endured the heavy wearisome loads I
have hauled how I have endured sum
mers heat and thirst and winters bit
ing blasts how I have stood naked to
the January snow while my master was
inside the bar room taking a lengthy
gossiping drink well It would make
me sick to think of it I am old and
gray and spavined and worn out To
me death comes as a friend and I wel
come ihim but on behalf of my jjjfior
dumb kindred let me give you all a
parting word of advice I have lived
a virtuous and upright life I even slept
upright and am therefore entitled to
give counsel In your dealings with
the brute creation do not Just
then death knocked on xne door of his-
forehead and the gallant old steed felL
instantly dead There was hardly a
tremor The 1G50 volts did their work
ere you could count one and a quartern
The experiment was a brilliant success
If the scientific lightning kills men as-
quickly the old rope route will be dis
counted badly There will be no wait
ing for a number of anxious moments
watch in hand and finger on fluttering
pulse while the hanging culprit con
vulsively struggles and perhaps strang
gles to death No the released soul will
fly as fast as lightning across that
bourne whence no traveler returns
The administration is to be congratu
lated and Superintendent Green and
Electrician Canfield have done their
work well
Mothered a Kitten
Near Opelika Ala lives a farmer
named Henderson who has a hen of
which he is proud About a year and a
half ago the hen went to sitting steal
ing her nest in a corner of the carriage
house Not wishing to encourage a mi
gratory propensity among the poultry
Henderson told one of his children a
bright little boy named Tom to break
the hen up and coax her back to the
fowlhouse Tom made repeated efforts
to carry out his fathers instructions
but it is easier said than done to bnklleL
ft
up a sitting hen Day after day the f w
hen went back to her nest in the car
riage house till Tom was in despair and
hit upon the following novel plan to
oust her from her chosen abode There
chanced to be a litter of kittens on the
place that needed disposing of and Tom
thought to combine business with pleas
ure by putting one of the mewing young
things in the old hens nest This would
seem to be a very effectual way not
only of breaking up the hens house
keeping but of getting rid of the kitten
as well as she would no doubt turn
upon the disturber of her peace and de
stroy it This was Toms idea at least
but the plan did not work
Instead the old hen in lieu of some
thing better hovered over the kitten
until it passed beyond the stage of
adolescence thereafter caring for it as
dutifully as if it had been the most lov
ing of chicks In turn the kitten seem
ed well pleased with its new quarters
and its strange foster mother and would
follow at her heels answering her
clucks with a dutiful mew picking
up-
crumbs and stitry bits of meat that
found their way into the chicken food
The strange affection thus engendered
between the hen and the kitten contin
ues unabated though the latter is now
a full grown cat
Adroit Reply
Dr Howley Archbishop of Canter
bury who died in 184S upheld the dig
nity of his position in the fashion deem
ed necessary
One day he drove up to the door of
the House of Lords in a coach and
four with liveried coachman and two
footmen A Quaker who knew him
addressed him
Friend Howley what would the
Apostle Paul have said if he had seen
these four horses and the purple liv
eries and all the rest
The archbishop who was seldom
flustered replied with a benignant
smile Doubtless the apostle would
have remarked that things were very
much changed for the better since his
time
Sweet Relief
I tell you nature never gives us
more than we can stand Look at Gild
by Yesterday he was attended by -two
doctors and three trained nurses
And then what happened
Death came and put an end to his
sufferings Brooklyn Life
Then Jamie Laughed
Jamie called his mother sharply
youve been loafing all day Satan
always finds work for idle hands to do
Take this basket and bring in soma
kindlings Christian Advocate
It is a long lane that has no turn butr
the main question is where in thunder
does it go to when if does turn
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