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The official Government tests
show Royal Baking Powder to be
an absolutely pure and healthful
rgrape cream or tartar oaKing
powder and care should be taken
to prevent the substitution of any
other brand in its place
With no other agent can bis
cuit cake and hot breads be made
so pure healthful and delicious
Royal Baking Powder costs only a fair price per pound
and is cheaper and better at its price than any other baking
powder in the world It makes pure clean healthful food
Royal Cook Book 800 Receipts Free Send Name and Address
ROYAL BAKING POWDER CO NEW YORK
WHEN HER BACK ACHES
A Woman Finds AH Her Energy and
Ambition Slipping Away
McCook women know how the ache
and pains that come when the kidneys
fail make life a burden Backache
hip pains headaches dizzy spells dis
tressing urinary troubles all tell of
sick kidneys and warn you of the
stealthy approach of biabetes dropsy
and Brights disease Doaus Kidney
Pills permanently cure all these dis
orders Heres proof of it in a
McCook womans words
Mrs C W Gillilan 407 B Ave
McCook Nehr says My kidneys
were badly disordered and I slept so
poorly that when I got up in the
morning I was all worn out I had
attacks of dizziness and nervousness
and spots often appeared before my
eyes My back ached intensely and
it could be plainly seen that I was
in need of a kidney medicine After
I had failed to find relief from sev
eral preparations I learned of Doans
Kidney Pills and procured a supply
This medicine acted on my kidneys at
once and soon restored me to good
health I gladly tell of my experience
for the benefit of other kidney suf
ferers
For sale by all dealers Price 50
cents Foster Milburn Co Buffalo
New York sole agents for the Unit
ed States
Remember the name Doans and
take no other
Notice to Creditors
In the county court of Red Willow
county Nebraska In the matter of
the estate of Patrick Thomas Coyle
decdased To the creditors of said
estate
You are hereby notified That I will
sit at the county court room in Mc
Cook in said county on the 16th day
of October1911at one oclock P M
to receive and examine all claims
against said estate with a view to
their adjustment and allowance The
time limited for the presentation of
claims against said estate is six
months from April loth 1911
Witness my hand and the seal of
said county court this 22nd day of
March 1911
J C MOORE
Seal County Judge
C H BOYLE Atty
First publication March 23 4t
Something special The Weekly
Inter Ocean and Farmer and this pa
per 125 for one year Ask us what
it means
Subscribe for The Tribune
3 j U-
The Baker Telephones
Thats a pretty big order but I guess we can fill it
Mighty lucky you called up so we can start to work at
once and get the ovens hot
Oh yes well have the pies ready in plenty of time
Local service is of inestimable value to the baker in keep
ing in touch with his customers but when there are unusual
demands on the capacity of his plant he has to reach the whole
saler atv once
In such emergencies the baker appreciates the value of long
distance Bell Telephone Service
Nebraska Telephone Co
CHAS W KELLEY McCook Manager
BULLARD LUMBER CO
SELLS
THE
BEST
Lumber and Coal
BULLARD LUMBER CO
Phone No i
THE McCOOK TRIBUNE
Odd Happenings That Helped to
Spice the Meals
THE WORM THAT DIDNT TURN
It Spoiled a Funny Story For a Wo
man Whoso Pet Horror Is Anything
That Wriggles A Distracted Scien
tist and a Gastronomic Calamity
At a dinner party one night my host
and 1 were in the midst of an interest
ing conversation when I noticed a
movement in the lace centerpiece
which lay under a pot of growing
tulips The lace was pushed aside and
straight toward me wriggled a fat red
earthworm If 1 have a pet horror it
is for anything that -writhes My host
was nearing the point of a funny story
when I caught sight of that strange
intruder on a dining table He reach
ed the end of the story and laughed
I believe I laughed but to this day I
cannot tell what that story was about
I sat watching the gymnastics of that
lively specimen of fish bait In forty
seconds it was due to tumble into my
lap Thsre was no waiter near The
reptile was hidden from my host by a
soup plato The man at my right was
absorbed -In conversation with a wom
an beside him The worm had almost
reached the edge of the table when I
had an inspiration I turned a red
wineglass upside down for the waiter
was approaching with a napkin wrap
ped bottle
Have you turned White IUbboner
asked my host
For tonight I have Where my
voice came from I do not know neither
do I know how I ever sat out that
meal listening to a host who tried his
level best to entertain a dull guest
and watching a frantic fishworm try
to break its way out of jail Some
how growing plants on the dining
table have gone out of favor in our
house
A dear distracted old scientist I
know keeps his wife on the anxious
seat every moment when they dine
out She is prepared for any ridicu
lous thing he will do No one ever
possessed Gner breeding or gentler
manners than the good old professor
but his fits of abstraction are likely to
descend on him at any moment His
wife tells of one notable experience
One night she says I lectured
John all the way home from a dinner
I was trying to make him understand
that pate shells were intended to be
eaten If it had been a caterers
meal I should have thought nothing
about it but our hostess was a fine
cook and she had just announced
proudly that we were having some of
her own puff paste Everybody ate
the pates except John With the
greatest care he scooped out the
creamed chicken and left the shell
He was horribly distressed over it
If I had only known my dear he
said that the thing was intended to
be eaten that it was really food and
she made it I should have shown my
appreciation
Remember it next time then I
said
A week later at another dinner
John was seated opposite me I
glanced at him curiously after the
dessert came on for he seemed to be
In the throes of a choking fit Imag
ine if you can my horror He was
trying to masticate the paper case of
a charlotte russe There was only
one thing I could do call him to order
as one would have done a child I
could not sit by calmly and watch him
choke to death Dinners are frequent
ly stupid affairs but that one was not
after I had explained the situation to
a tableful of people Fortunately John
Is so brilliant that his absentminded
ness is considered a natural adjunct
to genius
My husband said one woman is
the funny man at a party when the
mood happens to seize him One night
after playing bridge we filed out to the
dining room where we were seated
about the table for supper From
the corner where my husband sat
came gales of laughter He had turn
ed conjurer and was making every
thing disappear from salt spoons to a
water decanter When things were
found it was in the most remarkable
places
A week later while searching his
clothes for soiled handkerchiefs that
is a regulation Monday morning task
in our home I heard something rattle
in his dress coat From an inside
pocket I drew two silver forks three
teaspoons and a salt spoon They
were marked with various initials
None of the stuff came from our side
board My husband was out of town
and I spent a few perplexed hours An
idea suddenly dawned on me I wrap
ped up the silver put on my hat and
went straight to the hostess of our last
card party Thank goodness she
cried I have nearly had nervous
prostration over the loss of these
things Servants have been suspected
I hired a man to go over the garbage
ilump and the whole house has been
turned upside down in our search If
it had been my own silver it would
not have been so bad but it was bor
rowed and I could not duplicate it any
where in town Wait till I see that
husband of yours
The story got out and sometimes
a hostess in facetious mood Insists on
counting her silver before my better
half goes home Isabel Gordon Curtis
in New York Tribune
No Stop
Ticket Collector We dont stop here
sir Montague Swank who has just
given up a ticket Stop where Ticket
Collector At the pawnbrokers Lon
don M A P
DIAGNOSING A JOKE
It Seemed Easy at First but the Case
Proved Hopeless
The name of the author of the fol
lowing story is better known for poet
ry than prose However here is what
B E Kiser perpetrated at a conven
tion of American humorists
Taw and maw were sitting in the
Bitting room one evening and pretty
soon paw began to lall
Whats wrong maw ast
This is one of the best joaks I ever
saw paw says
Lissen and Ill read it to you Why
Is the mistake of a dockter not as bad
as that of a dentust Do you know
paw ast
No maw told him
Becoz paw red one fills six feat
and the other fills an aker
How do they do that maw ast
Becoz they made A mistake paw
ansered
Which does maw says
Both of them paw told her
Thats why the mistake of the dock
ter izzent as Bad as the dentusts
Why not says maw
The dockter only fills Sis feit
paw told her and the dentust fills An
iker
I dont understand About the feat
maw sed Why does he Fill six of
them and What does he fill them
with Paw began to look kind of
glassy out of his eyes and he Red the
Joak again to himself So he would be
sure he Didnt make enny mistake
Then he says
Why you see if a dockter would
make a mistake it mite be fatle and
bo he would fill six feat of earth with
a man because the man would Be
about sis feat tall you no
I dont see mutch to laugh a bout
such a joak maw told him May
be it mitent be a man at all Or he
mite be short
Oh well paw says they just pre
tend He would be a six footer so as
to Make it come in with the aker
Why do they want to do that
maw ast
Thats the joak paw says
Which is maw told him
Why the aker paw ansered
Where are they enny Joak about
that maw ast
The dentust fills it you no paw
sed but lie Didnt seme to be very sure
about it By that time
Yes maw says but you red that
he made A mistake
Dont you know what an aker is
paw ast A tooth that You fill Is an
aker and They have akers of ground
But where does the mistake come
in maw sed
Why he Fills the rong one paw
answered Wiping his forrid and kind
of looking Around like if he was try
ing to see If the escape was all cut off
Well then how does He fill the
aker miw ast if the tooth he Fills
is the rong one And duzzent ake
Then paw got up and tore the Al
mannick in two and Threw it in the
waist basket and sed
They are no use Trying to bring
enny sunshine into This fambly Lets
drop the subject The man that rote
the joak Was a fool and the one that
printed it was a worse one but Im not
going to rong Either one of them by
unjust suspishens Mebby they didnt
every try to tell it To a woman
New York Post
He Ate the Hay
There are still some mighty eaters
left Not long ago a Berlin market
porter undertook for a wager to put
away at one sitting six mutton chops
twelve eggs a goose a duck six
pounds of potatoes and twenty two
pounds of hay Difficulties were antic
ipated with the last course and large
sums were laid against the accom
plishment of the feat The ingenious
porter solved the difficulty by calling
for a cigarette after he had finished
the duck He then set light to the
hay pounded the ashes up with the
potatoes and swallowed the lot Aft
er a heated discussion the referee de
clared him the winner London Globe
Heavy Rollers at St Helena
If the sea were to break on the
shores of Coney Island in time of calm
weather with the same force as It
doeson the shores of St Helena sec
tions of South Brooklyn would be un
inhabitable in all likelihood They
have at St Helena what are known as
calcmmas or heavy rollers These
rollers are particularly bad in time of
calm weather They strike the island
with such tremendous force that the
spray is sent over Goat Pound ridge
which is several feet above sea level
Scientists are of opinion the calemmara
are caused by seismic disturbances be
neath the ocean Exchange
His Record Not Clear
Charles Smith a jovial negro was
arraigned before Judge Fawcett In the
county court Brooklyn on a minor
charge
Smith asked the court did yon
ever commit a crime before
The negro pondered for a moment
Well yo honah he answered slow
ly Ah cant zactly say but Ah done
got married one time New York
Times
Plenty of Company
Yes she went crazy over bridge
A sad case
Oh no great harm done They put
her in a fashionable sanitarium and
she is playing a better game than ever
now Washington Herald
The Last Hole
Figg That was a mighty appropri
ate text the parson took for poor
Brassies funeral sermon Fogg What
was it Figg He has finished his
course Boston Transcript
Happiness is not the end of life
character is Beecher
100 Reward 100
The readers of I his paper will be
pleaied to learn that there is at last
one dreaded disease thai science has
been able to euro in all its stages
and that is catarrh Halls Catarrh
Cure is the only positive cure now
known to the medical fraternity Ca
tarrh being a constitutional disease
requires a constitutional treatment
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken inter
nally acting directly upon the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system
thereby destroying the foundation of
the disease and giving the patient
strength by building up the constitu
tion and assisting nature in doing its
work The proprietors have so much
faith in its curative powers that they
offer One Hundred Dollars for any
case that it fails to cure Send for
list of elstimonials Address F J
CHENEY CO Toledo O
Sold by all druggist 75c
Take Halls Family Pills for con
stipation
When a inedicineiinust be given to
young children it should be pelasant
to take Chamberlains Cough Reme
dy is made from loaf sugar and the
roots used in its preparation give it
a flavor similar to maple syrup mak
ing it pleasant to take It has no
superior for colds croup and whoop
ing cough For sale by all dealers
Referees Sale
By virtue of an order of sale to me
directed by the clerk of the district
court of Red Willow county Nebras
ka on the judgments rendered in
said court in the cause wherein Anna
Farber and Christ Farber are plain
tiffs and Rosena Droll Catherina Zim
mer Jacob Zimmer William Droll
Martha Droll Edward Droll Carolina
Kutter Barney Kutter Augusta Droll
Mary A Vannier Louis Vannier
Frances Ballenger Riggs Ballenger
and Bertha Droll are defendants on
the tenth and eighteenth days of
February 1911 for the partition and
sale of the following described real
estate situated in said county to wit
The northeast quarter and the east
half of the northwest quarter and
lots one and two all in section eigh
teen in township three north of range
twenty nine west of the sixth princi
pal meridian and the east half of
the northwest quarter and lots one
and two all in section seven in said
township and range
I will offer for sale to the high
est bidder for cash on the 17th day
of April 1911 at the front door of
the courthouse in Red Willow coun
ty Nebraska at one oclock in the
afternoon in quarter section tracts
all of said land including the home
stead and dower estates of Rosena
Droll in said land as set forth in
said judgment rendered February 10th
1911
Dated this loth day of March 1911
CHAS D RITCHIE Referee
First publication March 16 5
The McCook Tribune
the year in advance
MWy ivg
It is 100
THURSDAY APRIL 6 1911
SAINT ANN
Cloy Wright who has been sick is
able to be up and around again
A fine rain It does rain some
times It has been dry a long time
Anton Braun intended to go to
Nuckolls county the fore part of the
week on a land deal his intention is
to trade in his place for a place back
there
Victor Harr made a trip to McCook
Saturday
Oscar Kolbet from near Culbertson
is in this neighborhood at present He
is intending to go to Maywood with
his brother Henry
Several from here were in McCook
Saturday
April 4th
BEGGS BLOOD PURIFIER
CURES and Purifies the Blood
Large and Small Jobs
are equally well looked after We
are ready at short notice to fix all
leaks or other repairs in your plumb
ing or in your heaters and stoves
All Jobs Thoroughly Understood
and after we are through with them
you will find us the best men who
ever did the same work for you and
we do it cheap
MiddletonRuby
Phone No 182 - McCook Nebr
Linooln Sanitarium
Sulpho Saiiire Springs
Located on our own premises and sm
In the
Natural Mineral Water
Unsurpassed in the treatment of
Heart Stomach Kidney and Lirsr
Diseases
Modtrats Cfurgci Aiiitxs
DR 0 VV EVERETT Mgr Lincoln Rrt
BEGGS BLOOD PURIFIER
CURES and Purifies the Blood
V waM4mlAffllBWI
GO SOMEWHERE THIS SUMMER
TO THE EAST In due season attractive tourist rates will be announced
to the Lake and St Lawrence regions Atlantic Coast cities and resorts
Can we help you plan an Eastern tour
Or if you prefer the West think about the mountain climate and the
scenery of Colorado the Big Horn region or a tour through Yellow
stone Park there are circuit tours embracing Scenic Colorado Salt Lake
Yellowstone Park and the Big Horn Mountains all in one journey Per
haps you can take this summer that long wished for journey to the Pacific
Coast embracing by diverse routes the entire West and Northwest re
gions A summer tour whether through the East or through the West
has become to many a necessity while railroad and hote Ifacilities make
it a diverting and enjoyable experience There are no tours in the world
that offer the traevler so much for his money
Get in touch with us Let us help you plan your journey and pro
vide you with free descriptive publications as soon as received from our
printer
L W WAKELEY
General Passenger Agent
Omaha Nebraska
D F HOSTETTER
Ticket Agent
McCook Nebraska
ntnMWyrTw8ffyinryrTnTT ii ii m v i v iiHih i i tttty
f
V Franklin Pres G H WATKiNSJVice Pres
E A Gkeen Cshr
The Citizens National Bank
of McCook Nebraska
Paid Up Capital 50000 Surplus 25000
DIRECTORS
V Franklin A McMillen R A Green
G H Watkius Vernice Franklin
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