if
J
V
Ks
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k
Hi il
1 -
J
2v E Whitney
I
-
Walter Hosier
WHITNEY HOSIER
Draymen
Prompt Services Courteous
Treatment Reasonable Prices
GIVE US A TRIAL
Office First Door
SumofDeGrofPs
Phones 13 and
Black 244
FRED WIGGINS
AUCTIONEER
nia over 1000
Zfciabury News
Dntpr
will cry your
sales any
time any
where
Bills post
ed in the
Sappa coun
try and tin
cups fur
nished for
your free
lunch with
o u t extra
charge
Terms 810
first S1000 or
less 1 per
cent on all
sales run-
made by The
Danbury Nebr
COAL
We now handle the best
grades of Colo and Penna
coals in connection with
our grain business
Give us a trial order
Phone 262
I Real Easterday
tt4C8
9PlSMNHn
bu Are Articular
JgUT you are no more particular
when you buy a suit than we are You
strive to get the greatest value for your money So do
we Its good business Where you would lose 1
we would lose 1000 We are proud of our buying
ability when we offer you Clothcraft Clothes
f We bring them to you
JRif from a maker who has
XSsta achieved WnnHrrS In flip r lnrhinnr
world By scientific tailoring
the Clothcraft manufacturers reduced the
cost of production one third And the
gain to you is pure wool clothes with
lasting shape and style to sell at reason
able prices
With every Clothcraft garment goes a
guarantee signed by the maker that frees
you forever from clothes troubles
AlPbol Clothes 10 to25
Let us show you this splendid line
C L DeGroff Co McCook
I Hughes Crescent
jS
Cottage Paints
are sold in McCook by
H P WAITE and CO
CaXSSXSSXsXSsXS
Summer Coal
Try our Pea Co il
for summer use
Its All Coal
We carry a regu
lar stock of coal
and can meet all
your needs Phone
169
Updike Grain Co
6sX5XsXSsXSX
Middleton Ruby
PLUMBING and
STEAM FITTING
All work guaranteed
Efcone 182 McCook Nebraska
A G BUMP
Real Estate
and Insurance
Room Two over McConnells drug
store McCook Nebraska
i tw THfift t t UTi t
W fpw nwmnz
MAY PROVE FATAL
Wnen Will McCook People Learn the
Importance of It
Backache is such a simple thing at
first
But when you know tis from the
kidneys
That serious kidney troubles follows
That diabetes Brights disease may
be the fatal end
You will gladly profit by the follow
ing experience
J L Davis living in Arapahoe Neb
says About a year aga I was in very
poor health having suffered from kid
ney trouble for some time My body
was racked from dull nagging pains
and I felt nervous and restless all the
time The secretions from my kidneys
were too frequent in action scanty in
passage and contained a heavy sediment
My feet and ackles also became swollen
and 1 suffered from frequent chills
After using several remedies with un
satisfactory results Doans Kidney
Pills were brought to my attention and
I procured a box They relieved me at
once and I continued to use them until
I entirely received a permanent cure
Plenty more proof like this from Mc
Cook people Call at McConnells drug
store and ask what customers report
For sale by all dealers Price 50 cents
Foster Milburn Co Buffalo N Y sole
agents for the United States
Remember the name Doans and
take no other
DANBURY
R E Pogue was a business visitor
Wednesday
Prof Morris didnt come Monday
night as he went away on a visit
The Danbury band will give another
concert in the near future
A nurse from Norton Kas came
Tuesday night to care for G G Adams
who is sick
B B Smiley shii ped 1000 head of
sheep to St Joseph Tuesday last
The lightning we had last week hit
Nick Wyckoffs house and stunned Mr
and Mrs Wyckoff and Grace
J A Fisher and wife are the proud
parents of a baby boy born April 13
This vicinity received a nice rain
Wednesday and Thursday
Ralph Smith of Marion was in town
a short time Tuesday
J V Ruby formerly of this place
now living at Eastwood Neb are the
proud parents of a baby boy
Miss Lottie Watkins is on the sick
list
Mr and Mrs Rea Oman and M M
Young and wife spent Sunday at Ray
Youngs
J H Wicks and Martin Nilsson of
Marion were in town a short time Sat
urday They came down in an auto
The band boys got a notice that their
band suits were packed and shipped
Pneumonia follows a cold but never
follows the use of Foleys Honey and
Tar which stops the cough heals the
lungs and expels the cold from the sys
tem A McMillen
nii nr rmawiWHIMJJ
The Brand of Laugh Extractors
Used Two Centuries Ago
IN JOE MILLERS JEST BOOK
A Selection of Specimen Jokes From
the Venerable Volume That Mark
Twain Was Moved to Call the Alpha
and Omega of Dejected Humor
The Joe Miller Jest Hook It Is
famous Mark Twain mentions it as
the alpha and omega of dejected hu
mor It Is unrivaled Incomparable
apart Further It is English very
English
Possibly the hitter phenomenon Is re
sponsible for the difficulty a searcher
had In hiding an unrevlsed copy Aft
er an afternoon of search a second
hand but scarcely worn copy finally
was discovered in a little bookstore
The bookseller eyed the buyer curious
ly but with some awe and seemed
very glad to get rid of It for liu cents
Twentj tive cents How instantly
reminiscent of one of the Joe Miller
jokes beg pardon jests
THE LIGHT SUBJECT
The government having threatened to
proceed rigorously against thote who re
fused to pay assessed taxes offered to
them a remission of one fourth Tills at
least said one suffrer may be called
giving them some quarter
You can get that off in your very
next after dinner speech You can put
a little accent on one fourth and quar
ter and get quite as loud a laugh
Second specimen it must be remem
bered that the jest book was compiled
in the early part of the eighteenth
century when there were literarians
therefore the jests that arent blamed
on lords are mostly charged to writ
ers
A DIFFERENCE
Jerrold one day met a Scotch gentleman
WhoBe name was Leitch who explained
that he was not the popular cartoonist
John Leech Im aware of that said
Jerrold Youre the Scotchman with the
in your name
There Just think of the triumph with
which Mr Jerrold later related that quip
to his friends
Specimen
THE CONNOISSEUR
A person to whom the curiosities build
ings etc in Oxford were shown one very
hot day was asked by his companion if
he would see the remainder of the univer
sity My dear sir replied the connois
seur 1 am stone blind already
Whether the friend expired in
spasms of mirth or subsequently was
hanged for mayhem the jest book
doesnt say
The wit of the Irish is called in too
Specimen
A SPRIG OF SHILLALAH
A fellow on the quay thinking to quiz
a poor Irishman asked him How dd the
potatoes eat now Pat The Irish lad
who happened to have a shillalah in his
hand answered cleverly Oh they eat
very well my jewel Would you like to
tasto the stalk And knocking the in
quirer down he coolly walked off
Probably it was a good thing he
knocked him down first
Turning to the middle of the book
there are 400 pages Joe breaks into
verse
ON THE LATIN GERUNDS
When Dido mourned Aeneas would not
come
She wept in silence and was
Classic
Heres
A BAD END
It was told of Jekyll that one of his
friends a brewer had been drowned in
his own vat Ah he exclaimed float
ing in his own watery bier
Right off the bat that
Theres little Johnny also He drops
in during jest
THE SEASON INGS
Come here Johnny and tell me what
the four seasons are
Young Prodigy Pepper salt mustard
and vinegar
Heres a little shot at politics and
the peer system
EPIGRAM
On Alderman Woods being afraid to
pledge himself to even tne principles he
has always professed
Sure in the house hell do but little good
Who lets I dare not wait upon 1
Wood I would
Oh listen Talk about your origi
nality
A SHORT JOURNEY
Zounds fellow exclaimed a choleric
old gentleman to a very phlegmatic mat
ter of fact person 1 shall go out of my
wits
Well jou wont have far to go said
the phlegmatic man
Yes and heres a small ebullition
from a dramatist
OLD FRIENDS
Coleman the dramatist was asked if
he knew Theodore Hook Yes replied
the wit Hook and eye are old associ
ates
Hook was no at the time
The courts also conic through with
a few gems
NEW RELATIONSHIP
A stranger to law courts hearing a
judge call a sergeant brother expressed
his surprise Oh said one of the by j
oianuers iney are Drotners orotners in
law
And speaking of repartee
A SHUFFLING ANSWER
Two Oxonians dining together one of
them noticed a grease spot on the neck
cloth of his companion and said 1 see
you are a Grecian
Pooh said the other That is far
fetched
No Indeed said the wit I made it
on the spot
Right back at him you observe
Of course there are some better ones
but there are also some that are worse
Taken as a whole they dont add any
laurels to the English reputation for
humor nor detract any from the opin
ion of Mark Twain Kansas City
Times
Emperors and cobblers are alike and
the same reason that makes us wran
gle with a neighbor causes a war be
twixt princes Montaigne
I
ASHER C HINDS
The Man Talked of to Succeed Speak
er Cannon
The proposition to remove Speaker
Cannon by means of the combined
vote of Democrats and insurgents and
substitute in his place Ashcr C Hinds
has brought the parliamentarian of
the house much In the limelight of
late Mr Hinds has long been the
right hand man of the speaker and has
at his tongues end the rules of the
7-
ASHER O HINDS
house and most of the precedents and
authorities concerning decisions of par
liamentary law
Mr Hinds Is known officially as
clerk at the speakers table and
came to his place in the Fifty first
congress being selected by the late
Thomas B Reed former speaker
When the Democrats took control he
returned to his newspaper in Portland
but went back to the Fifty fourth
congress and ever since has held his
present position
A SEA FLIER
The Recent Sensational Flights
2 Let wKSKEa3fse32yS
fyms -
7Mswffigm
XA
--
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- -
-
-- - -- -
i r h j - - - v y
- A i S
W lVVjMiJ j lljj - V j T
AN AIRSHIP LINE
Tsv jyjs
spsii
of
Rougier Over Monaco Bay
Europe has been keenly interested
recently in the marvelous work of M
Rougier the French aviator who in
HOUGIERS START IN STREET AT MONACO
IN BIPLANE OVER MONACO BAY
his Voisin biplane flew over Monaco
bay and out to sea He is the first avi
ator to traverse this hay in an airship
and has gained much fame by his suc
cessful trip
The affair opened with a sensation
that the residents of Monaco who wit
nessed it will long remember Instead
of making the run that is necessary
before the machine will fly along the
grass of an aviation field he used a
public street for this purpose
Charles J Glidden of Boston Planning
Aerial Road
Charles J Glidden the millionaire
automobile and airship enthusiast of
Boston is progressing rapidly with his
plans for an airship passenger and
freight line between Boston and New
York lie plans to have stations at
Hit-
WV
Pfcf4
Copyright Boston Photo News Co
CHAELES 3 GLIDDEN
South Framingham Worcester Bridge
port and other points between and
hopes to have the service in working
order within the next sis months
This is not a money making scheme
on the part of Mr Glidden who has
associated with him some of the best
known aeronauts and aviators in
America
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
Ezra Meeker
and His
New Plans
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
EZKA MKEICEIt
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
o
LMOST every
body has
heard of
Ezra Meeker who
with his genuine
old prairie schoon
er drawn by ox
teams started on
a journey sevetal
years ago to mark
the Oregon trail
and It will he of
Interest to thou
sands of persons all over the country
to learn that he Is now to push that
work to completion The same lum
bering oxen and battered prairie
schooner with Its tar bucket swinging
from the rear axle will again carry
the pioneer of the Oregon country
back over the trail which he and his
family used In making the trip
through the wilderness between Kan
sas City and The Dalles Ore fifty
eight years ago He will he accom
panied by W B Mardon and Mrs
Mardon and two helpers the party
following the trail eastward by way
of Walla Walla Wash southwest of
Spokane
Though more than eighty years of
age Meeker is endowed with the un
conquerable spirit of the western set
tler and is hopeful of carrying out
the work of marking the trail from
east to west in memory of the brave
men and women who blazed the way
that led to the opening of the Pacific
empire before his spirit crosses the
great divide He retraced the old trail
in 190b erecting granite memorials in l
uie larger iuwus anu cities aiso visit
ing President Itoosevelt at the White
House
The purpose of the trip upon which
the Meeker party will start within
three months is to secure data and
other information necessary to map
the trail and to arouse interest in a
campaign for funds witti which to
complete the work There is a com
mittee bill before congress appropri
ating 30000 to provide granite mon
uments and markers but a clause re
quires the father of the idea and the
various historical societies interested
to manifest their sincerity by subscrib
ing whatever money may be necessary
in addition to the appropriation con
templated by the government It Is
planned to select a representative
from each historical society In the six
states covered bj the trail to assist
In locating the overland route and
placing the monuments
At an age when most men are con
tent to lay aside lifes burdens this
prosperous old farmer chooses to re
new his youth by practically living
over again the life of pioneer days
and by dedicating his old age to what
he believes to be a public duty Mr
Meeker abandoned his home in Indi
ana in 1832 and struck out for Oregon
His present home is In that part of
the original Oregon tract which be-
1
11 mm rKftps -
PYBMterV y wrmyi y
JrlBBIlMlJfiMriBBN5HiMlMfer r
jEZRA MEEKEK S OLD PBAIKIE SCHOONEIJ
came Washington territory now the
state of Washington and there he set
tled and prospered
Starting from his home in Puyallup
Wash on Jan 29 1900 Mr Meeker
retraced his march of fifty four years
before back along the Oregon trail
to its eastern terminus on the Mis
souririver then across Iowa and Illi
nois to his old Indiana home As he
journeyed he interested the people
along the route in the importance of
saving the Oregon trail from oblivion
Their fathers and grandfathers had
helped to make it but the past was
in a fair way to be forgotten The
line of a great transcontinental rail-
road parallels or covers the old
gon trail for much of its way today
but there were detours and stages to
1 he marked before they were lost sight
of entirely
I So this old trail which was one of
the great roadways of the nation a
I century and a half ago has become
known better than ever to the present
generation Between Puyallup and
Omaha many monuments have been J
erected Mr Meeker after a years
travel reached his former Indiana
home his journey and his task ended
as he thought then but now he is to
carry the work on to completion
After he left his Washington home
more than 2o00 persons contributed
to the erection of Oregon trail monu
ments At intervals along the route
Mr Meeker with the aid of people for
whom he and others blazed the way
erected monuments a huge stone
bowlder here a cairn of stones there
a signboard or post in another place
In Baker City Ore the monument
was erected by contributions received
from 800 school children all of whom
were present when it was dedicated
How often do you
eat this food
A short time ago there appeared in
the columns of one of the prominent
magazines an article on building brain
and muscle by the proper selection of
the foods you cat
A good many people were surprised
to find oatmeal placed at the top of the
list of foods recommended but if the
article had appeared in an English or
Scotch paper every reader would have
expected to see first place given to
good oatmeal
As a matter of fact Great Britian
and Europe come to us for tremendous
quantities of Quaker Oats because it
represents to them perfect food being
the richest in flavor and best in clean
liness and purity of all oatmeals
Americans should eat more Quaker
Oats the results would soon show
themselves in improved conditions of
health and strength 55
Lumber
and
Coal
Thats All
But wo can meet your
ovory need in theso
linos from our largo
and comploto stocks
in all grades
Barnett Lumber Co
Phone 5
LtJtingtt
Mike Walsh
DEALER IN
POULTRY EGGS
Old Rubber Copper and Brass
Highest Market Price Paid in Cash
New location just across lnC rftr
street in P Walsh building ItCOUK
a
3r7 trwffwn mnNni ifiTrmfrm m
Dr J O Bruce
OSTEOPATH
Telephone 55 McCook Neb
Office over ElecrlcTheatre on Main Ave J
At l I l ttjtiijlAia dU ijLiiiAii tUMdhit
Dr Herbert J Pratt
REOI4TEEED GRADUATE
Dentist
Office
21254 Main a v over McConnells
Drug Store McCook Neb
Telephones Office 160
Hesidence Blacx 131
a i v ihwi v v p vfyy tyy 11 it 11 yj
R H Gatewood -
DENTIST
J Office Room 1 Masonic temple
Phone 13 McCook Nebraska
jthti r 1
iAU iLii it n HjLikM
DR EARL 0 VAHUE
DENTIST
Office over McAdams Store Phone 190
Dr J A Golfer
DENTIST
Room Postoffice Building
Phone 378 McCOOK NEBRASKA
OVER 65 YEARS
EXPERIENCE
3H JjgfnwwiXm
iBHBK3S
Trade Marks
Designs
Copyrights c
Anyone ending a sketch antl description may
qnlcklr ascertain our ci ulca free whether an
invention Is probably rtentabl Cominunlev
tlons strictly conUdentlaL HANCEQGK on Patents
sent free Oldest acency for eecurinijpatenta
Patents taken tbroush Jlnnn Co recelre
rpteial notice without charge In tho
Scientific Bnerican
A handsomely Illustrated weekly Ijircest cir
culation of any crlentltlc iirnal Terms 3 a
year four months L Sold by all newsdealer
MUNN S Co361BroatJ New York
Branch OQce 635 F St- Washington V C