The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, July 22, 1909, Image 6

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    CHAUTAUQUA
Are you going to the Chautauqua
This great program Includes Beau
champ the Sunshine Man
Shungopavl the Magician
MacQuecn the noted African Ex
plorer
The greatest American Bird Nat
urallst Ernest Harold Baynes
A few only of the many excellent
treats for the Chautauqua goers
Get a program and plan to attend
th many excellent programs offered
Miss Maud Kirksmith
Miss Maude Kirksmith is violin
ololst of the Kirksmith Sisters Com
pany and an artist of exceptional
ability Her finished execution rich
full tones and pleasing personality
make her at once a favorite with the
audience
William Rainey Bennett
Wm Rainey Bennett of Indiana
la one of the most popular lecturers
oa the Chautauqua platform
Have you heard Bennett If not
then you have missed a real treat
Mr Bennett will deliver one of his
xcellent lectures at the Chautauqua
Many Chautauqua managers voted
Bennett the best on the program last
eason
PUBLIC LIBRARY NOTES
The library has recently purchased a
set of books which it is hoped may
prove useful to those who are studying
for civil service examinations The set
comprises three volumes of The Civil
Manual Vol 1 Arithmetic Vol 2
EDgliBh and Allied Subjects Vol 3
Geography and Spelling They are
such text books as are used in business
colleges for civil service preparation
and contain practical exercises and
sample sets of examination questions
They give information of value to one
preparing for the examinations and we
hope they may be much used for self
improvement by those who have not
been able to take so complete a course
in the subjects as they would like
The Chippendaleeby Robert Grant
is one of the best new novels we have
received It is a study of old and new
Boston It is very analytical in its
characterizations and the reader is in
terested from the first in the antagon
isms between the two elements the
traditional and the progressive conflict
ing everywhere in the business and
the social circles alike One follows to
the end with growing sympathy in the
gradual assimilation despite the major
and minor obstacles and rejoices in the
consummation when true love overcomes
cold conservatism and rank radicalism
and he lays the book away feeling con
vinced that the old and the new will
live happy ever after as all good story
book people should
While maDy of the new books could
never be called anything more than
a story The Chippendales is
rightly entitled to be named a novel
Libra r tan
Cash Register Stationery
Received on account Paid out
Cash Credit slips etc for sale at
e Tribune office Per 1000 50c
FRANK BEETLE
ENGRAVER and ELECTROTYPER
rrtONCIIM 1420 24 LXWREKCC DEKVCB COLO
emm
Worss Than His Own
A gentlemun who owns one of tho
finest estates In the north of England
while In his gardens one morning no
ticed one of the laborers very badly
clad und asked him
Have you no better clothes than
those Mat
No In troth yer honor worse luck
replied Mat
Well call at the house this evening
on your way home said the- gentle
man Ill leave an old suit of mine
with the butler for you
A few days later when showing a
party of visitors through the gardens
he was much annoyed to see Mat look
ing if possible more a scarecrow than
ever
Why are you still wearing those old
clothes Mat he asked
Sure yer honor theyre the best I
have replied Mat
But did you not get the suit I left
for you the other day asked the gen
tleman
Indeed an I did thank yer honor
kindly replied Mat but sure I had
to lave them at home to be mended
London Tatler
When Baseball Was an Infant Industry
It was a crude game but merry In
theory the pitcher was there only to
give the boys a chance to soak the
ball First bound was still out The
unfortunate catcher handling a heavy
lively ball without mask glove or pro
tector stood up near the bat when
men were on bases If he had the skill
and courage The early guides recom
mended him to do so when he could
Had not the pitcher been restricted to
an artificial throw scarce a catcher
would have lived to tell the tale
Many catchers took everything on
first bounce and managed at that to
prevent much base stealing Base run
ning also was in its Infancy Smith
says the Spirit of the Times caught
a remarkable game having but five
passed balls scored against him Here
and there we get a glimpse which
shows how crude it all was what a
matter of hit and miss natural force
In the fifties Dicky Pearce shone with
out a peer as an infielder He used to
stop grounders with his hand and foot
Will Irwin in Colliers
She Did So
Always said papa as he drank
his coffee and enjoyed his morning
beefsteak always children change
the subject when anything unpleasant
has been said It is both wise and
polite
That evening on his return from
business he found several of his flower
beds despoiled and the tiny imprint of
slippered feet silently bearing witness
to the small thief
Mabel he said to her did you
pick my flowers
Papa said Mabel did you see a
monkey in the city today We had a
Never mind that Did you pick my
flowers Mabel
Papa what did grandma send me
Mabel what do you mean Did you
pick my flowers Answer me yes or
no
Yes papa I did but I thought I
would change the subject London
Tit Bits
Look After Your Property
It Is a safe rule in this world to look
carefully after the details of your own
property Be sure your title deeds are
recorded that your insurance is kept
up that you alone haYe the key to
your strong box in the safety vault
Do not leave your securities with your
broker If he is doing a conservative
business he has no need of them If he
Isnt you dont want him to handle
your property The wonder Is that
with all the confidence reposed In
financial matters there are so few def
alcations There is no use in making
it easy for some one to get your prop
erty In this world It Is hard for most
persons to acquire anything and they
should be careful to the last degree in
seeing that they are fully protected in
It Philadelphia Inquirer
Britains Greatest Precipice
Writing to the Newcastle Journal In
regard to the drowning of three bird
catchers at St Kilda a correspondent
says the wild fowls of St Kilda find
nesting places that enable them to bid
defiance to the sportsman nud to the
most daring of bird catchers There
is for example the precipice called
Conagher the same being far and
away the greatest precipice in the
British Isles the deepest perpendicu
lar precipice It rises from the sea
level to a clear height of 1220 feet
Consider that a man might jump froir
the top of Conagher into the sea with
out getting a scratch by the way
Breaking ths News
Marion who had been taught to re
port her misdeeds promptly came tr
her mother one diy sobbing penitently
Mother I I broke a brick in the
fireplace
Well that is not very hard to rem
edy But how on earth did you do It
child
I pounded it with fathers watch
Success Magazine
Accessories
Im going in for poetry lisped the
sweet young thing
Real heartfelt poetry thundered
the man of letters is only written In
a garret
Yes Ive heard that So Ive fitted
up a beautiful Turkish den In oura
Washington Herald
Quito Warm
I understand there was a hot time
in the Bangs household the other da
Yes When he went home he found
him a roast Baltimore American
Praise a
1 Proverb
fine day at night Irish
53Ki
snsr
j MV M
- in or tur insane
Happy and Honored Guests of the
Inhabitants of Gheel
One of the most remarkable places
In Europe of which no tourist on pleas
ure bent ever takes notice says a writ
er in a Berlin paper is the City of the
Insane by which name Gheel near
Antwerp has been known for genera
tions About 1500 men and women
afflicted with insanity in all Its forms
live there and have a happy being as
the guests of the Inhabitants who
know by experience how to treat the
unfortunate ones In the streets In
the places of amusement the cafes
and workshops these patients may be
found and nowhere is there the re
motest suggestion of restraint appar
ent The board ranges from 240 to
2400 marks a year and no matter
how small the amount may be the pa
tient is always the favored member
of the family He has the first right
to the most comfortable chair and the
head of the table belongs to him He
receives the most attention and this
he learns to appreciate and to endeav
or to maintain by living down his
illness Even the children know how
to treat the demented people The
dangerous ones are sent to another
settlement and to Institutions It is
wonderful how considerate careful
and kind the simple people are toward
their charges and a peep Into the com
munity would probably terrify physi
cians who had never heard of and
could not appreciate the good which is
being done In this City of the In
sane
A RACE ON ICE
The Skates Th2t Got Away and Those
TharWere Recovered
Thackeray oftce asked one of the
men who let out skates on the Ser
pentine whether he had ever lost a
pair through the omission to exact a
deposit and he replied that he had
never done so except on one occasion
when the circumstances made it al
most pardonable
A well dressed young fellow was
having his second skate fastened or
when he suddenly broke away fron
the mans hands and dashed to the ice
The next instant a thickset powerfu
man was clamoring for another pair
He was a detective in pursuit of ht
prey and a very animating sight I
was to watch the chase He was aw
he had boasted a first rate skater and
It became presently obvious that he
was running down his man
Then the young fellow determined to
run a desperate risk of liberty The
Ice as usual under the bridge was
marked Dangerous and he made for
It at headlong speed The ice bent be
neath his weight but he got safely
through
The sheriffs officer followed with
equal pluck but being a heavier man
broke through and was drowned
His skates said the narrator of
the incident I got back after the in
quest but those the young gentleman
had on I never saw again London
Telegraph
The Salt Sea Legend
There Is a legend in the Norse scalds
which explains why the sea is salt
The bountiful Frodl whose mythical
reign was a golden age Indeed pos
sessed a quern or hand mill which
ground out gold and peace but which
would grind out stores of anything de
sired by its owner Two giant maid
ens ruled over by Frodi were the
grinders In an evil day a sea rover
came upon the scene slew Frodi and
carried off the quern and the two
giant maidens who worked it When
the sea rovers vessel was right out at
sea he ordered the maidens to grind
salt At midnight they asked if they
had not ground enough The sea
rover angry at being awakened from
his sleep commanded them to grind
until morning Now the giant maid
ens naturally enough worked very
quickly so as they went on grinding
the load of salt grew so heavy that It
sank the ship and now the sea will
continue salt forever
Looked Too Far
There was an English farmer a
Somersetshire man who once owned
a telescope The old man remarked
to a friend afe a local race meeting that
the gentry nowadays had glasses for
both eyes and added that he had had
one once for one eye a right good one
it was but now it was no use at all
no not to nobody
Why not asked the friend
Well he said it were a good one
I could see miles wi en I could see
plain fhe steeple of the church five
miles off But missus son John he
borrowed en and he tried to see the
steeple of tother church ten miles
off and tried and tried and couldnt
And that strained It and it were nev
er of no use any more no not to no
body
A Troublesome Mirror
Mamma said Flossie this old
looking glass isnt any good
Why whats the matter with It
dear asked her mother
Every time I try to look In it ex
plained Flossie my face gets In the
way
As a Corollary
Are marriages made In heaven
As to that I cant say but I do
know this much
Whats that Peleg
Theres lots of courting done In
church Louisville Courier Journal
Didnt Get a Chance
She What did papa say when yon
his wife simply boiling and she gavei asked hlm for m hand
He couldnt
No your mother was therel Yon
leers Statesman
Old Manx Banknotes
Speaking of the curious Maux bank
ing lore of the past the Liverpool Post
says that a singular state of affairs
was exhibited In the Island at tho
close of the Napoleonic wars Trade
was brisk money was more freely ad
ventured and all sorts of private per
sons began to Issue notes There waf
no occasion whatever to have sterling
against them AH you had to do was
to get some one to take them and pass
them on The fashion grew till even
the humbler traders Issued card
promises to pay the values most in
circulation being 5 shillings a shilling
and even sixpence Once an advo
cate from Castletown went to Peel to
collect a judgment of 330 from the
coroner of Glenfaba This worthy paid
him 2704 card notes many of thein
worthless They took several hours to
examine and count and their trans
port was an item of extreme difficulty
Finally they were put into a big sack
half shaken to one end and half to the
other and the whole slung over the
back of a horse The lather of tho
horse soaking through spoiled nearly
half the cards
Clearing the Atmosphere
In his capacity of dramatic critic
Mr J Comyus Carr the author wrote
a notice of the play of Charles I in
which Irving played under the man
agement of Mr Bateman Ills produc
tion deeply Incensed the manager In
order perhaps to find the opportunity
of Informing the critic of his disap
proval the manager Invited him to a
supper at the Westminster club on the
second or third night of the produc
tion When he thought the fitting mo
ment had arrived Mr Bateman led the
conversation to the point at issue and
emphatically banging the table with
his fist declared In the loudest of
tones that he did not produce his plays
at the Lvceum theater to please Mr
Comyns Carr There was a moments
awkward silence which Mr Carr con
fesses he did not feel quite able to
break but which was released by a
wit of the company with the happy re
tort Well dear boy then you cant
be surprised if they dont please him
Sight Lost and Restored
A farmers wife who had had much
trouble with her servants was accosted
by one of them
I fear I shall not be able to work
much longer I think I am going
blind
Why how is that You seem to
get along pretty well with your work
Yes but I can no longer see any
meat on my plate at dinner
The farmers wife understood and
the next day the servants were served
with very large and very thin pieces of
meat
How nice the girl exclaimed My
sight has come back I can see better
than ever
How is that Bella asked the mis
tress
hy at this moment replied
Bella I can see the plate through
the meat London Scraps
His Passport
On one occasion Gustave Dore the
artist lost his passport while on a tour j
in Switzerland At Lucerne he asked
to be allowed to speak to the mayor
to whom he gave his name
You say that you are M Gustave
Dore and I believe you said the
Real Estate Filings
The following real estate filings have
been made in the county clerks office
since last report
James Cosgroet ux to Joseph
V Harrison wd to pt 8 9 10
11 12 in 32 Indianola 375 00
Mary Fay wid to Charles F
Lehn wd to 9 in 8 lBt Mc
Cook 80000
Isaac J Brinegar et ux to G L
Woodward wd to nw qr 23 3 t
09 4800 00
James R Vance et ux to Got
hob Zimmerman wd to s hf
neqrl 2 in 2 4 29
Clarence E Hotze unmd to
Alfred H and Amanda I
Bell wd to pt se qr sw qr 7
327 47 45
Edward Brown et ux to Wesley
v Miner ueeu ku i u
Marion 240 00
Bullard Lurabpr Co vs Adam
Scbillereff m lien on 6 in 2
7th McCook 328 00
Opporchunity
Opporchunity knocks at iviry mans
dure wanst On some mans dures it
hammers till t nr ks down the dure
and thin it iros jud wakes him if
hes asleep aii nerwards it works
for him ab niht nnrchman On other
mins dures it kno ks and runs away
an on the dures of some min it knocks
an whin tbey come out it hits thim
over th hend with an ax But iviry
wan has an opporchunity soyiz had bet
ter kape yer eye skinned and nab it
fore it slips by an is lost forbver Mr
Dooley
Delay in commencing treatment for a
slight irregularity that could have been
cuied quickly by Foleys Kidney Remi dy
may result in a serious kidney disease
Foleys Kidney Remedy builds up worn
lit tissues ana strengthens these
organs A cMillen Druggist
Fortune Telling
mayor but and he produced a piece Great Northern Raihv
of paper and a pencil you can easilv I
nrove it Coeur dAIene Reservation
Dore looked around him and Rnw i tickets to Spokane
some peasants selling potatoes in the
street With a few clever touches he
reproduced the homely scene and ap
pending his name to the sketch pre
sented it to the mayor
Your passport is all right remark
ed the official but you must allow me
to keep it and to offer you in return
one of the ordinary form
Brutal Indifference
It seems since his marriage Jack
Thornley has developed into a perfect
brute
You surprise me What has he
done
Why the other night while his
wife was regailing him with all the
particulars of that choice Verifast
scandal she noticed that he seemed
very quiet And what do you think
He was sound asleep Cleveland
Plain Dealer
Nearing the Limit
An old lady was going down in the
cage In a Cornish mine She looked
with apprehension at the rope and
asked the miner anxiously My man i
are jou sure this rope Is quite safe
Well mum was the cheerful an
swer these ropes Is guaranteed to
last exactly six months and this aint
due to be renewed till tomorrow
Birmingham Mail
The Real Trouble
Im afraid said the lady to a di
minutive applicant that you are too
small to act as nursemaid to my chil
dren
Oh Im not too small replied the
applicant I guess the trouble is your
children are too large Chicago
News
The Press Agent Proposes
Your pulchritude is peerless You
are an astounding aggregation of fem
inine faultlessness Be mine
Sure responded the girl I never
could resist that press agent lan
guage Louisville Courier Journal
Return of the Prodigal
Whos that a hollerin down yander
In the branch
Thats the prodigal son The old
V3ans a wailin thunder out o him fer
runnln aw ay Atlanta Constitution
There Is no wisdom like frankness
Beaconsfleld
What Docs He Believe
The Rev George Aabmore Filch on
of threw graduates of the Union Theo
logical Bemiuary who in a recent exam
ination denied the virgin birth of
Ohrist the historical identity of Adam
and Eve the raising of Lazarus from
the dead and tho resurrection of tho
body of the Savior nevertheless has
been ordained by the New York Presby
tery by a vote of 10 to 7
The Rev Daniel Seolyo Gregory
managing editor of the Standard dic
tionary and an educator of note spoke
for the opposition
Tonight he said it was a case
of the Bible against the mun One or
the other had to be thrown out and
the Presbytery of New York threw out
the Bible as the infallible guide to faith
and practice
Many people with chronic throat and
lung trouble have found comfort and
relief in Foleys Honey and Tar as it
cures stubborn coughs after other treat
ment has failed L M Rugglea Re
asnor Iowa writes The doctors said
I had consumption and I got no better
until I took Foleys Honey and Tar It
stopped the hemorrhages and pain in my
lungs and they are now ns sound as a
bullet A McMillen druggist
Engraving- and Embossing
Your wants can be supplied at Thk
Tribune in the line of engraving and
embossing such aB calling cards invi
tations and announcements monogram
correspondence paper etc Handsome
samples of all on display Prices rea
sonable Prompt service If interested
come and inspect
Have You An Oliver
Remington Stnith - Premier or Cali
graph typewriter We have at this
office ribbons for any of these makes
Also good assortment of papers manu
script covers carhon paper etc
Does not take into consideration the one essential to wom
ans happiness womanly health
The woman who neglects her health is neglecting the
very foundation of all good fortune For without health
love loses its lustre and gold is but dross
Womanly health when lost or impaired may generally be
regained by the use of Dr Pierces Favorite Prescription
This Prescription has for over AlO years
been curing delicate weak pain wracked
women by the hundreds of thousands
and this too in the privacy of their homes
without their having to submit to in dell
cate Questionings and offensively repufr
nant examinations
Sick women are invited to consult Dr Pierce by letter free
All correspondence held as sacredly confidential Address Worlds Dispensary
Medical Association R V Pierce M D President Buffalo N Y
Dr Pierces Great Family Doctor Book The Peoples Common Sense
Medical Adviser newly revised up-to-date edition 1000 pages answers in
Plain English hosts of delicate questions which every woman single or married
ought to know about Sent free in plain wrapper to any address on receipt of
21 one cent stamps to cover mailing only or in cloth binding for 31 stamps
New Land Chances
Flathead Indian Reservation
Spokane Reservation
Register at Kalispell Montana on tho
Register at Coeur dAIene Idaho Buy
Register at Spokane Washington
Registration dates July 15 to August oth inclusive This is another of the
remaining few chances for this generation to obtain good government land Call
on nearest ticket agent for descriptive leaflet showing conditions excursion
rates train service etc
The Burlington Great Northern Spokane and Seattle train takes you through
the wealth producing Wenatchee fruit country and shows you the wonderful
upper northwest empire every mile is interesting
Big Horn Basin A splendid choice of the government irrigated lands is still
left to homesteaders in this fast growing country
320 Acre Mondel Lands Thousands of acres of these larger sized tracts
are now available for free homesteading in eastern Wyoming and are going fast
D CLEM DEAVER General Aoest
Land Seekers Information Bureau Omaha Nebraska
fcvYHTfTrrvrrr rvlTMftp
V Franklin Pres - Jas S Doyle Vice Pres
R A Green Cshr - G H Watkins Asst Cshr
The Citizens National Bank
of McCook Nebraska
Paid Up Capital 50000 Surplus 25000
DIRECTORS
V Franklin Jas S Doyle R A Green
G fl Watkins Vernice Franklin
JVlAWl4iWil ililiililitililaitLLiiaiiiiAtiiililiililil 1 r f y ii 11 ijg
Your Moneys Worth
It is our determination to give every patron
real valuefull worth of his coin at this yard
t
Bullard Lumber Co
M 0 McClure Manager Phone Number One
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