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LAST RESORT FOR HIS CASE
Yokels Recipe for Man Who Would
Be Cured of Love
Apropos of leap year Robert Barr
the Anglo American novelist and edi
tor told at it dinner reecntly a story
about love
A man be said being profoundly
In lovo consulted a philosopher
1 am In love be complained and
I dont like It It keeps me from
working from acquiring fame Can
you cine me
In the study of astronomy said
the philosopher stroking his gray
heard you will find a cure for love
Contemplate the planets and in the
Infinite depths of interstellar space
the puniness of yourself and the insig
nificance of your love will stun you
So the lover commenced star gaz
ing and all went well for a night or
two Then as he sat in ids lonely
tower with ins eye glued to a tele
scope the girl came and put her white
arms about ids neck
That night he gazed at the stars no
more Astronomy be saw was no
cure
But love irked him and lie sought
out an alchemist
Give mo a philter he said that
will cure me of love
The alchemist smiled
There are many stories lie said
about philters of this sort but they
aie all young sir quack nostrums
The only love cure I can give you is
prussic acid
But the man shook his head Ho
did not want to die lie wanted with
a free calm mind to do his work
And as be mused on his hard caso
he saw a yokel digging in a ditch and
as he dug the yokel regarded the man
curiously
Plainly you are rich the yokel
said why then do you frown and
sigh
I am in love the man answered
It is torment How can I bo cured
The yokel roared with laughter
Ho ho he shouted that is an
easy one Dont you know the an
swer
No said the man What is it
Tell me quickly
Marry the girl said the yokel
and he resumed his digging
Exiles Life in Siberia
A letter dated August 1907 on the
Amir High Road once more directs
attention to the sufferings of the thou
sands of exiles banished to Siberia At
the outset the writer explains that he
formed one of a party of 120 exiles 23
of thorn being state or political orend
ers detailed to work on the construc
tion of the Kolessnava literally wheel
load and sent thither under Cossack
escort from the penal settlement at
Irkutsk
After describing the journey of tho
party to Pashkovo a Cossack settle
ment on the Amir he says
One single days rest Avas allowed
us but on the following day we were
roused at -1 a m and driven to work
It was raining fast and for a whole
verst our way lay across submerged
land Every day for a fortnight we
had to cross this same Hooded ground
stripped to the skin and carrying our
shovels on our shoulders This was
our life of torment Up every morn
ing at four working until five or sis
in the evening and returning then
utterly wo in out for roll call prayers
and sleep
Sleep In ragged and battered tents
open to the rain and dirty and damp
within No mattresses only sacks to
lie on sometimes stuffed with grass
We are already bitterly cold here in
August and in these same tents we
must live until November The
spot where we are working is between
14 and 16 versts from the camp We
have thus to walk some 30 versts
daily besides performing our hard
task How hard that task is may be
gathered when it is said that ten men
are required each day to excavate a
length of some 200 feet and a depth
and width of 1 arshins about a
yard One has to work knee deep
in mire and after about three weeks
rheumatism sets in and the legs of
the workers being to swell
Girl Seventeen Years Old Saves Boy
Emma Werner 17 years old of Cor
ona L I dressed in her best Sunday
clothes jumped into Frog Pond near
her home a few days ago and saved
Robert Pick from drowning Robert
is ten years old He was coasting on
Randall avenue when his sled got
beyond his control veered from the
highway ran down an incline and out
onto the pond The thin ice broke
and boy and sled disappeared from
view From her window Miss Werner
saw the accident and with no hesi
tation she ran across the street and
plunged in The water came up to
her shoulders She waded out caught
hold of the struggling boy and started
for the shore By this time others
had arrived on the scene and together
they got the boy and Miss Werner
out
Youngest Midshipman in Navy
Louisiana has the distinction of hav
ing the youngest midshipman in the
United States naval academy Annapo
lis Md Alfred Shepard Wolfe was
born in the city of New Orleans
March 5 1S91 and entered the naval
academy July 6 1907 after having
successfully passed both the mental
and physical examinations The min
imum age allowed at Annapolis is 16
He was appointed by the Hon Rob
ert C Davey from the Second congres
sional district Alfred Wolfe received
his entire education in the public
schools of New Orleans leaving the
junior intermediate boys high school
class to enter the academy
INDIANOLA
Mish Elma George visited bomefolks
in Cambridge Sunday
Charles Lohn of McCook spent Sun
diy in Indianola the 8th
Alis Iliizol Phillips wont to Holdrege
Sunday morning and 3pont the day with
friends
Mr and Mrs Tom Haley and father
drove down to llolbrook Monday to
visit a few days with friends
Tho Misses Mamie Mann Bertha
Walker and Margaret Townloy were
McCook visitors Saturday
Miss Mann resumed her school duties
again Monday morning after two weeks
vacation caused by tho serious condi
tion of her father
Anna Smith attended church and
Sunday school in Bartley last Sunday
after which suo was the guest of friends
Ernest Crabtroo loft Monday night
for Seattle Wash to bo gone a few
weeks
Cal Rollins wont to McCook Thursday
ovoniug on business
Miss Josephine Murray was a passen
ger on going to McCook Mopday evo
ning
Chester L Walker of McCook was an
Indianola visitor Friday
A number of McCook people attended
Catholic church hero Sunday
Bert Marshal and frau have departed
from their late job of holding down the
central oilice
Kov Burrus and wife and Mr and
Mrs Frank Moore drove out to the
home of Mr Seddon Wednesday and
visited through tho day
John Murray of McCook accompanied
by a lady friend visited the home folks
west of town Tuesday
Jim Murray has gone to Washington
for a while
The members of tho Jtf E church
gathered at tho parsonage Tuesday
evening and proceeded to givo their
pastor a pounding in the way of good
things such as makoth tho inner man
co rejoice A large crowd was in atten
dance and all enjoyed tho occasion im
mensely When at a late hour tho
company dispersed it was with the
impression that the minister and his
wife were royal entertainers
Henry Sherer had his baud crushed
in a corn sheller Tuesday Tho doctor
thinks he can save part of his hand
Clark McClung and family arrived in
Indianola for a visit with relatives and
friends Tuesday evening
D W Schoenthals Sunday school
class gave him a surprise party Friday
evening They also presented him with
a nice rocker in token of their good
wishes Tho evening was very pleas
antly spent in various ways such as
placing games eating oysters cake
fruit etc Every body present had a
fine time
Quite a number from this place at
tended the sale out at the farm of W A
McCool on Tuesday last
Grandpa Phillips died at an early
hour Saturday morning after a linger
ing time of old ago and its attendant
infirmities Tho funeral occurred at
tho home Tuesday morning at 10
oclock Sermon by Kev Cox of the
Christian church All the children
were present at tho funeral
Fred Kennedy brother of the Ken
nedy brothers in the east side restaur
ant is hero on a short visit with the
folks
Mrs Charles King is very sick
Rumor says that Johnny Harrison
ha3 traded his house and barn livery
for a farm in Kansas
PLEASANT PRAIRIE
Charles Olmstead and family visited
in Kansas Sunday
Mr and Mrs J G Relph and family
of Marengo Iowa stayed over night
with C M Lofton Friday They are
going on their farm north of Traer
We are sorry to hear that Charley
Randel who has been confined to his
bed for sometime with quinsy and
rheumatism is but little better
Charley Olmstead Fred Dillon and
Jos Albrecht leave for Colorado Wed
nesday in quest of land
John Styer of Marion shelled corn for
C L Hawkins and Bert Goodenberger
this week
This is fine weather and the time of
year when a fellow must get up and
dust
RED WILLOW
Mrs Smith Miss Rozelle and Gabriella
Longnecker attended a school entertain
ment in Indianola on Friday afternoon
Mrs Fulk of Joplin Missouri who
wns once Mrs Method of Red Willow
called on some old acquaintances last
week
Leon Smith has walked five miles to
school almost every day during the
winter rain or shine snow or not there
by developing into a strong robust
youth
William Randel has been feeling the
effects of grippe
Mrs Owens Longneckers little baby
is sick again
While shelling corn at Mr Hatchers
on Tuesday Henry Sheere had his hand
terribly mangled in the sheller
Ask to see the Strathmore typewriting
paper at The Tribune office
DANBURY
Mr Williams and family have moved
hero from Alta la and will live hero
Miss Nollio Andrews who has boon
nursing in a hospital in Dunvor is homo
on a vacation
Phillip Gliom and family left Wednes
day for their now hoiro in Detroit Mich
Wo regret losing thorn from our town
W J Stilgobouor and family were
visiting in Birtley last week
Mrs F G Stilgobouor of Bartloy visit
ed with friends and relative a fow days
last week She was called horo on
account of her mothers accident
J E Noo and family and Miss Grace
Phillips were called to Indianola Satur
day by tho death of Mrs Noos father
Mr Phillips
Harold Stone gave a surprise party on
Otto Glietn Monday night Otto will
bo greatly missed among the young peo
ple of Danbury
J W Andrews and family visited in
Lebanon Sunday
Married at McCook last Saturday
evening Miss Lena Goodenberger and
Mr Win Mustgravo They will livo
with Thos Mustgravo south of town
Miss Julia Hundly visited with honie
folksin Benkelman last Saturday
Quite a number of Danburyites at
tended tho homo talent play in Lebanon
Friday ovoning Thoy pronounced tho
play fine
Mrs Josie Leisure is visiting in Mc
Cock with her brother Clifford Naden
and family
Miss Mary Greenway closed a success
ful term of school in tho Thomas dist
rict last Friday She will finish a term
near Lebanon which was begun by her
sistor Dora who will work in tho res
taurant for her cousin Rob Cathcart
Miss Grace Gorver arrived from
Wheeler Kans to work in the hotel
BARTLEY
Mr Lon McCann and Miss Rogers of
Freedom were married Sunday We
wish them happiness and prosperity
Zack McCollum went this week to
Kimball county with a carload of stock
and household goods for the homestead
Charles McCollum recently secured
in that county
Tho new residence James Finnegan
is building will bo a good ono when
completed and is in a fine location
More land buyer hero this week from
the east
Street grading concrete street cro3S
ings and more sidewalks will be built
soon
Tho revival meetings at the Methodist
church are being well attended and
much interest manifested in religious
work
Bartloy is not booming it hi just mak
ing a steady growth to keep up with the
improvement being made in the sur
rounding territory
A movement is on foot to erect a new
telephone building with prospects of a
successful termination It will be a
good thing for all concerned We will
then have both night and day services
Several carloads of cattle and hogs
shipped from Bartley this week
Frank Doak is now miller and Smith
Durbin engineer at the Bartley mill
Dr Brown has resigned his member
ship of tho Board of Pension Examin
ing Surgeons
R F D No 1
Amos Rogers and bride arrived from
California last Friday on No G and
wore the objects of a stirring charivari
on the following evening at Shadeland
J W Walker with two carloads of
goods arrived from Naponee last of last
week and moved onto the Joseph
Downs farm Tho family arrived on
Monday of this week
Franz Arp is the new owner and oc
cupant of the Henry Voge farm
A bouncing twelve pound baby girl at
W P Broomfields
Herman Bey who recently bought the
house on the Kern place has moved the
house from the same onto his home
place
The relatives who have been visiting
Mike Esch have gone down to the east
ern part of the state on a visit to friends
and will go from there to their home in
Canada
Rev Ramelow and wife have both
been on the sick list as a result of the
excitement incident to the burning of
the parsonage barn
Mis Amos A Rogers is visiting rela
tives over in Atwood Kansas
Where the Value Is
Only two worthful items enter into
the value of advertising namely quant
ity and quality that is how many and
how good The McCook Tribune is in
a field by itself locally on these two
points We challenge and invite in
spection and comparison We can give
you from two to three times the value
for your money that any other Red
Willow county publication can offer
vou
Typewriter lor Sale
If you are interested in securing a
Smith Premer Typewriter in splendid
nnnrlirinn at half mice Call in THE TRI
BUNE office and see the machine It is
a bargain and will be sold because the
owner has two machines
FENNEY WALKER
GENERAL CONTRACTING P INTERS AND DECOR TORS
Not How CIiMiip but Mow Good with Us
Office and Shop west of First National Bank
Steel Ceilings Sold Put Up and Decorated
The McCook Tribune
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Orders taken for
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