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OME to me my dolly dear
- Pretty soon twill te New Year
Have you always been quite good
Minded me as well s you could
Kept your dresses clean and neat
Havcd to others nice and sweet
If you havent Dolly Dent
Nows the time for you to pent
II
jOLLS as well as little girls
- Must not tumble up their curls
Must not tear their stocking knees
Must say Thank you sir and Please
Must be still when grown folks talk
Good when they go out to walk
If theyre not dear Dolly Dent
Nows the time for them to pent
III
pHATS what I hear papa say
And on eery New Years day
As I sit upon his knee
He tells how good he means to be
Kisses me and mamma too
Promises what he will do
Do you hear me Dolly Dent 1
Nows the time for you to pent
THE HUMAN TONGUE
Eloquent Even When It Does Not Ar
ticulate a Word
It is never necessary for the tongue
to talk in order to tell that you are ill
or the nature of your illness The
tongue of the dumb is quite as elo
quent when viewed by an experienced
physician as the tongue of the most
i Ukative person
It is a wonderful organ and should
be studied by all parents not only on
their own account but on account
of their offspring It aids in mastica
tion of food in drinking in sucking in
articulation and contains in its mu
cous membrane the peripheral organs
of taste There are doctors who will
spend half an hour feeling of your
pulse and listening to your heart beats
There are others who command
Stick out your tongue One glance
at your tongue will to theni tell the
tale
Tremulousness of the tongue when
It is protruded is a positive sign of
various nervous diseases But by far
the commonest cause of this tremu
lousness Is an excessive indulgence in
alcohol There is an old rule about
looking into a mans eye to tell if he
be a habitual lusher It often fails
Drink in some men excites the lachry
mal glands causing the eye to appear
watery But all of us know men who
have watery eyes yet never touch
liquor But the bet anl Kil test is
the tousue It is te - i that
IV
ND when New Years comes well be
Lovely children you and me
When were told well go to bed
We will mind just what is said
And when mammas friends are here
See how well we can appear
Then next year dear Dolly Dent
You and I wont have to pent
cannot De concieaiernira man seed
ing employment swears on a stack of
Bibles that he does not drink make
him stick out his tongue If it trem
bles he is a liar New York Tress
Combs Made of Old Shoes
A mountain of old boots and shoes
indescribably ugly indescribably filthy
lay in the factory yard
YTell make combs out of them
said the chemist combs that will pass
through the perfumed and lustrous
locks of the most beautiful girls
Seems strange doesnt it
Very
Yet its a fact That is what be
comes of all the worlds old shoes
They are turned into combs The
leather is first cut into small pieces and
Immersed two days in a chloride of
sulphur bath then It is washed dried
and ground to powder then it is mixed
with glue or gum and pressed into
comb molds
It makes good enough combs but I
prefer the rubber ones myself Ex
change
Neros eyeglass through which the
nearsighted tyrant watched the gladi
atorial games was an emerald cut Into
the form of a lens
Often the Case
A man should think twice before
ae speaks
And a woman three times before
she sings Harpers Weekly
W vSRJ r t l - v VI tstr k r J WW
t f - vJ J if II tL W 1
A xX w A tiA I 1 1 1
0yvA from Kc chiKViiay are old fttfajm
ian fci h ui iitfiv v w - h waB sr - i
- - - -
Jff11 ni i i -
A JAPANESE TOILET
The Demure Brown Maiden In Her
Holiday Attire
The Japanese college girl entertained
the fudge party with oriental remi
niscences
On every holiday she said the
Japanese maiden must rise and have
her toilet finished before the sun looks
over Fujiyama our sacred mountain
And what a toilet The long coarse
black tresses are washed comlMjd and
greased till the head shines like a
knob of polished black marble The
cheeks are rouged a fine pink The
throat neck and bosom are powdered
but at the nape of the neck there are
left three lines of the original brown
Bkln In accordance with the rules of
Japanese cosmetic art
With charcoal she rounds and
lengthens her eyebrows She reddens
her lips with cherry paste adding a
gilt diamond to the center of the pout
ing lower lip She puts on eight fresh
garments and she ties her obi or great
sash in a symbolical knot Her socks
she doesnt wear stockings are very
white and pure and her clogs are
lacquered till they shine like a silk hat
Now she is ready to set out She
fills her silk tobacco pouch thrusts her
pipe in her girdle puts six paper hand
kerchiefs up her wide sleeve and sal
lies forth turning her toes in and wav
ing her fan Avith a demure grace
Los Angeles Times
A ROYAL DENTIST
The Story of a Tooth Pulling by Peter
the Great
Peter the Great particularly delight
ed in drawing teeth and he strictly
enjoined his servants to send for him
when anything of that sort was to be
done One day his favorite valet de
chambre seemed very melancholy The
czar asked him what was the matter
Oh your majesty said the man
my wife is suffering the greatest ag
ony from toothache and she obstinate
ly refuses to have the tooth taken out
If that is all said Peter we will
soon cure it Take me to her at once
When they arrived the woman de
clared that she was not suffering at
all there was nothing the matter with
her j
That is the way she talksi your
majesty said the valet She is suf
fering tortures
Ilold her head and hands said the
czar I will have it out in a minute
And he instantly pulled out the indi
cated tooth with great dexterity amid
profuse thanks from the husband
What was Peters indignation to dis
cover a little later that his valet had
used him as an executioner to punish
his wife who had never had an un
sound tooth in her head Argonaut
Bridge Whist
At least GO per cent of the game of
bridge lies in the make A poor player
loses tricks and often the game and
rubber by his play but so many hands
occur in which there is really no play
that such losses are comparatively un
important compared with the havoc
wrought by an injudicious maker for
constantly his decision is invoked when
the safety of the game or its success
lies in his judgment of the value of
his hand To choose between hearts
or diamonds and no trumps to select
clubs rather than spades to know
when a five card suit is safe and
when one of four cards should be
chosen above all to keep an unrelax
ing attention upon the state of the
score with its shifting demands all
these are the sterling qualities of a
good maker Once sensible that you
are lacking in any such respect you
will find your game appreciably
strengthened by attention and study
Good Bridge
The Victorian English
The England which spoke the lan
guage which was already dying in the
eighteen sixties was before all things
a world of the country The sights and
sounds of nature played a far greater
part in the lives of the mass of the
people than they do today This is re
flected for instance in the way in
which birds and animals were spoken
of and the names given them I have
myself once or twice heard old people
In the country speak of the hen as
Dame Partlet One Is familiar with
the phrase from books of course it is
Chaucers Pertolette but once or
twice as a child I actually heard it 1
suppose it would be impossible to hear
it anywhere now London Outlook
Fluency of Speech
The common fluency of speech in
many men and most women is owing
to a scarcity of matter and a scarcity
of words for whoever is a master of
language and hath a mind full of ideas
will be apt in speaking to hesitate up
on the choice of both whereas com
mon speakers have only one set of
ideas and one set of words to clothe
them in and these are always ready
at the mouth so people come faster
out of church when it is almost empty
than when a crowd is at the door
Dean Swift
Exemplified
Georgie Auntie what does irony
mean Auntie It means to say one
thing and mean the opposite like call
ing a rainy day a fine day Georgie
I think 1 understand you auntie
Wouldnt this be inny Auntie I
dont want a nice big piece of cake
Odd Change
Grabbit has given up bank clerking
to take a position as a conductor on
the electric cars
But thats an odd change
Odd change Sure Thats what in
duced him Bohemian
Let every bird EinR its dwii note
Danish Proverb
CITY LODGE DIRECTORY
A V A M
McCook LwIko No 133 A F fc A M meeta
ovory first ami third TiMuirfiiy of tho mouth nt
8KX p in iu Masonic hall
ClIAHLKH L FaHNEBTOCK V M
Lon Cose Sue
noniitMAKiia
McCook Lo1ro No 407 15 of H M I S H of
A moots first and third Friilas of each mouth
in Odd Follow hail
OKGKKK OI IIONOIt
McCook LndcoNo 3 D of H moots evory
6ecoud urid forth Fridays of each month atS00
p in iu Gaiijcliows hall
Mis Lauba Osiiuhn C of II
Mns MatieG Welles Roc
eagles
McCook Aorio No 1M 1 F 0 13 meets tho
second and fourth WtMluijxlpjs of each mouth
at 800 pm iu GhuscIiowh hall Social meot
iufjs on tho first and third MYdnepdnjs
W II Cummins V Pres
H P Petkkson V Sec
EASTEKN STAIt
Eureka Chapter No 80 O E S meets the
second and fourth Fridus of each- month aj
HM p m in Masonic hall
Mas bKAii E Kay W M
Sylvesteii Coudlal Sec
O A It
J K IJarnes Post No 207 O A R meots on
the first Saturday of each mouth at 230 p in
Gutischows hall
J M Hendeimox Cmndr
J H Yaijgeu Adjt
KNIGHTS OF COLUMI1UH
McCook Council No 1126 K of C moots tho
first and third Tuc idajH of each mouth ntS00
p m in Diamond hull
Fuank Real G K
G R Gale F Sec
knights of PYTHIAS
McCook Lodco No 42 K of P moots every
Wednesday at 800 p m in Masonic hall
M Laweitsox C C
J N Gaarde K R S
knights templar
St John Commaiidery No 1G K T meets on
tho second Thursday of each mouth at 800 p
m iu Masonic hall
Emerson Hanson E C
Sylvester Cordeal Rue
LADY MACCABEES
Valley Queon Hivo No 2 L O T M meots
every first and third Thursday ovuings of each
mouth in Gunscliov hall
Mrs W H Mills Commander
Harriet E WiLLfcrrs R K
locomotive engineers
McCook Division No 623 H of L E meots
ovory first and third Saturday of each month at
8 00 in Berrys hull
W C Schesck C E
W D PURNETT F A E
cri
locomotive firemen
McCook LntlKo No MO H of L F E
moots ovorv Saturday at 800 p m iu Gaits
chows hall
W R Penninoton M
WS UixlfkSoc
machinists
Red Willow Lodo No Nj7 I A of M moots
every second and fourth Tuesday of tho mouth
at 800 p m iu Guusohow hail
1 O Hewitt Pres
II Andeiison Roc Sec
modern uoodmen
Nohlo Camp No GG3 M W A moots ovory
second and fourth Thursday of each mouth at
830 p in iu Gauschows hall
John Hunt V C
Harney Hokei Clerk
ODD FELLOWS
McCook LodRo No 137 1 0 0 F meets ovory
Monday u 1 800 p in in Gnnschow h hall
E II Doan N G
Scott Doan Sec
r e o
Chapter X P E O meets tho second and
fourth Saturday of oacli month at 230 p in
at tho homes of tho various mouthers
Mrs C W Hkitt Pros
Mrs J G Sciiouel Cor Sec
railway conductors
Harvoy Division No 93 O R C moots the
second and fourth Suudajs of each month at
300 p in iu Diamonds hall
Joe IIegenderoer C Con
M O McCluhe Sec
railway trainmen
C W Hronson IodRO No -187 H of II T
meots ovory Friday at 800 p m in Horrys
hall
II W Conover M
F Huston Sec
workmen
McCook LodRo No 01 AOUW meots ovory
Monday at 800 p m iu Diamonds hall
Wkii Stephens M W
C H Gray Rec
R A M
Kinp Cyrus Chapter No 33 R A M meots
evory first and third Thursday of each month at
800 p in in Masonic hall
Clarence H Gray II P
Clinton B Sawyer Sec
royal neighbors
Noblo Camp No 802 R N A meets every
second and fourth Thursday of each month at
230 p in iu Gauschows hall
Mrs Mary Walker Oracle
Mrs Augusta Anton Rec
R h m
eo Couucil Nol6RXS M moots on
the last Saturday of each month at 800 p in
in Masonic hall
Ralih A Haguerg T I M
Sylvester Cordea i Sec
w o w
Meets second and fourth Thursdays at 8
oclock in Diamonds hall
Ciias F Markwad C C
W C Moyer Clerk
THEORY
E H Lambert of Everett Massachusetts
Believes Stomach the Seat of Life
One of the most interesting state
ments made recently concerning the
much discussed Cooper theory that
Las spread over the country during the
past year is made by E H Lambert
a retired business man whose home is
at 115 Francis Street Everett Mass
Mr Lambert has this to say in con
nection with Cooper and his medi
cines Some time ago I read an ar
ticle about this man Cooper in which
he claimed that stomach trouble was
directly responsible for most ill health
He went on to say that although his
medicine did nothing but get the stom
ach in sound condition it wonld in
many cases remove kidney and liver
trouble and various other ailments
He argued from this that the stomach
was the main cause of sickness and
stated that the success he has had
with his medicines was due entirely
to this fact
I am now fully convinced that this
theory is correct and believe Cooper
has a really remarkable medicine
judging from my own experience
I huve been a sick man for five
years Three years ago I was told by
a physician that I had Brights dis
ease of the kidneys I have treated
constantly for this trouble since with
out results After reading the article
I have mentioned I purchased some
of this man Coopers medicine I have
been astounded by what it has done
for me I was relieved to some extent
within 24 hours Today my health is
better than for five years and so far
as I can tell my kidney trouble has
disappeared
My wife who had stomach trouble
for some time tried the preparation
after noting its action in my case
and her improvement is fully as mark
ed as mine She now eats heartily
three times a day without any distress
whatsoever Her nervousness has also
left her I certainly believe this mans
success is fully justified as he un
doubtedly has a wonderful medicine
We will gladly describe the remark
able record made by the Cooper medi
cines to all who wish to know of them
McMillen
The McCook Tribune
One Dollar Per Year
mm
Hi--iii
r
fctv
5
T f m
th
Tfi
Heann
Economy
l Baking
-Best by Test T
CULBERTSON
Thoro is qui to u heart in Culbertaon
about small pox hue no cases suro as
ot
Win Koroll from IJovorly was visiting
friends at this place Saturday nnd Sun
day
Mr and Mrs Jainei left Wednesdny
for lilooinington where ho will act as
depot ngont
SCHOOL NOlS
A few members of tho liitrti hcIiooI nro
absont on account of fraring tho small
pox No casfs yot
Ora Dhree has been absent from the
second primary lojarttiuitt tho past
week on account of sickness
Peter Bauer took up Sill rado work
at flchool last Monday Miss Hitch
cock assistant principal returned Mon
day from a two weeks visit in Omaha
YOU WOULD DO WELL TO SEE
J M Rupp
FOR ALL KINDS OF ftpfcfr Q
P O Box 131 McCook Nebraska
A G BUMP
Real Estate
and Insurance
Room Two over McConnella drug
store McCook Nebraska
I DrHerbertJPralti
Registered Graduate
Dentist
Oflico over McConnells Drop Store
McCOOK NEB
Telephones Oflico 160 resulenco 131
Formor location Atlanta Georgia
MEW YORK
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F D BUKGESS
umber and
Mjitter
Iron Lead and Sewer Pipe Brass
Goods Pumps an Boiler Trimmings
Estimates Furnished Free Base
ment of the Postoffice Building
McCOOK NEBRASKA
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