The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, November 13, 1903, Image 2

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A VOICE FROM THE PULPIT
81
ir IraHBj
Rov Jacob D Van
Doren of 57 Sixth St
Fond rtu Lac Wis
Presbyterian clergy
man says I had at
tacks which kept mo
in tho house for days
at a time unable to do
anything What I suf
fered can hardly bo
told Complications set
in tho particulars of
which I will be pleased
to give In a personal
intcrviow to any one
fvv wbo requires
Bcientiously say Doans Kidney Pills
caused a general improvement in my
health They brought great relief by
lessening the pain and correcting the
action o tho kidney secretions
Doans Kidney Pills for sale by all
dealers Price 60 cents Foster-Mil-burn
Co Buffalo N Y
Fourth Husband Sixth Wife
Mr Jerry Bostarth of Kenners
Brooks O has the habit of matri
mony At the age of 101 he has mar
ried for tho sixth time His bride
Mrg Jufia Ann Jenkins owns up to
niqety nine years and this is her
fourth husband The curious thing
about Ir Bosarth is that he appears
to bo qlite sane inasmuch as he did
not prLpose to somebody young
enough Ao be his great granddaughter
Catarrh Cannot be Cured
With LOCAL APPLICATIONS na thoy cannot roach
the Beat if tho dlnoie Catarrh Is a blood or consti
tutional disease and In order to euro It you must take
lulcnnl remedies Halls Catarrh Cure la taken In
ternally and acta directly on tho blood and mucous
rurfttces Halls Catarrh Cure Is not a quack med
icine It wan prescribed by one of the boat physicians
In this country for years nndln a regular prescription
It Is composed of the bent tonics known combined
with lliebost blood ptirlllero actlDR directly on tbe
mucous 6iirfacca Tho perfect combination of the
two Ingredients Id what produces such wonderful
results In curlui Catarrh Send lor testimonials free
F J CHENEY CO Propa Toledo O
fiold by drtiCRlotfl prlco 7c
Halls ramlly Pills are tho best
Rear Admiral Cook
Rear Admiral Cook who command
ed the Brooklyn at Santiago and has
just been retired is a Massachusetts
man and entered the academy at An
napolis in 1SG0 He was an ensign
1n the West Gulf blockading squad
ron during the last two years of the
civil war and was commissioned a
lieutenant in 18G7 In 18G8 he was
made a lieutenant commander a com
mander in 1881 and a captain in 188G
L ater he was given command of the
cruiser Brooklyn and remained in that
post until and during the war with
fepain Admiral Cook has a magnifi
cent physique and a frank and manlj
bearing
rifo8 Curo for Consumption is an Infalllblo
inodiclno for couchs and colds N W Saxuki
Ocean Grove N J Peb 17 IDOa
Leos Gifts in Kind
The most remarkable feature of the
estate of Pope Leo XIII prove3 to be
the enormous gifts in kind which for
years flowed in upon Leo XIII from the
while civilized world These it ap
pears were given in charge oC care
takers whose zeal was none of the
most intelligent In the result there
are now being unearthed for the first
time sucks of coffee and sugar ren
dered useless by years of storage
quantities of rare furs and still more
precious collections of bkls from Bra
zil and other remote parts ail ruined
through having been simply stowed
away as they arrived without even
beine unpacked The losses incurred
in this way represent a very large sum
DONT SPOIt TOUn CLOTHES
Uso Rod Cross Ball Bluo nnd keop them
white as snow All grocers 5c a packaga
Tho most vicious dog barks least
The delight of zero weather is to
get people by the ears
I The Courts Exceptional Tact
Postmaster General Payne was de
scribing an old time Milwaukee judge
who had been noted for his kind
heart
I attended one day said Mr
Payne a session of the court at
which this judge presided The court
crier was a very old man he had
served with fidelity for many years
but age was beginning now to tell on
him He fell asleep while I was in
tho court house and in a little while
ho was snoring
His snores of course disturbed the
proceedings of the court The judge
displayed great tact in interrupting
them without embarrassing the crier
-V prier Jones he said in a loud
voice Crier Jones some one is snor
ing
The crier awakened He started
to his feet
Silence he exclaimed There
must be no snoring in the court room
and he glared ferociously about him
Alls well that ends according to
your own diagram of the finish
There is
sympathy
no strength without
Has He Found It
Polk Ark Nov 9 A remedy that
will absolutely cure Rheumatism has
been discovered by Mr George Hiland
of this place Mr Hiland is satisfied
that the remedy he has used is a sure
cure for it cured him of a very seri
ous case of Acute Rheumatism when
he was so bad that he could not move
This is what he says
I was troubled with what is called
Acute Rheumatism in 1900 I was in
such shape that I could not move with
out help I was treated by a physician
who helped me some but I was still in
great pain when my wife saw Dodds
Kidney Pills advertised as a cure for
Rheumatism She insisted on my try
ing them and I felt better after taking
tho first box I continued and now I
am well and able to work all the time
I have found Dodds Kidney Pills to be
just what they are claimed to be a
perfect cure for Rheumatism
Mr Hilands very positive statement
neems to settle all doubt as to whether
or nbt Rheumatism can be cured
Lamb with green peas suits some
men but the Wall street broker pre
fers Iamb with greenbacks
ROUGH ON THE DOCTOR
Stonecutters Explanation Was Some
what Unflattering
The novelist Thomas A Janvier
has lived for a number of years In
trance and has collected many folk
tales and anecdotes of the French
peasantry
I heard a story of a physician the
other day Mr Janvier said recently
He was a physician of Provence and
one morning stopping his gig he en
tered into condescending talk with a
tombstone maker
While the talk went on the tomb
stone man did not cease to work He
had a chisel in one hand and a mal
let in tne other He was carving up
on his tomb the words Sacred to the
memory of and the rest he
would leave blank
This proceeding for some reason
amused the physician Watching the
stone cutter he laugned heartily
Why said the other do you
laugh
Because your way of work amuses
me the physician said Bo you al
ways cut out upon your headstones
the beginning of the obituary and
then wait
No said the stone cutter not al
ways When there is some one sick
and you are treating him I keep right
on
Sources of the Earthquakes
The great earthquakes are traced
by a committee of the British associa
tion to eight districts of which seven
are beneath the ocean Five fringe
the shores of the Pacific one is in the
Indian ocean one in the West Indies
and the eighth is in the Caucasian
Himilayan region Each of these
earthquakes shook the entire earth
while the broken up strata left gave
numerous after shocks The earth
quake movement is propagated around
the globe at the uniform rate of about
two miles per second but through
the earth the rate increases with the
depth to about seven miles per sec
ond
English Face Russian Competition
Russian goods are beginning to com
pete with English goods in the Asiatic
markets with some success especially
in Korea and in the vicinity of the
Chinese boundary The pioneer in
this line is a Moscow manufacturer
N I Konshin who has already a num
ber of representatives in China and
Korea
The busy wheezing little switch en
gines are candidates for the junk
heap Car switching has been taken
from them by shunting humps or
gravity switches and the work of
breaking up or putting together a
train is now done in a new way
A hill or graded inclined track
twelve feet high and one thousand
feet long is all that has been needed
to revolutionize train switching There
are not many of these inclines in the
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CHICAGOS NEW FEDERAL BUILDING
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r jnTBfilniTiTpiii iFTTrfi i ifiTrnPi TjMnriTlffrTCinffi
vp r - irfrrr i iTp i -- TsftW1tiaBMTnmvwnrrKTriS
When completed it will have cost 4500000 The structure covers an entire block and is of striking
architectural design
BOY WAS A DIPLOMAT
Went to Work In Neat Way to Secure
Tip
Hon Wilson S Bissell of Buffalo
conducted at one time a partnership
in law with Grover Cleveland Mr
Cleveland during his partnership fre
quently went hunting and fishing and
would never fail on his return to send
a bird or bass to Bissell
One day a servant of Mr Cleveland
a boy of seventeen or thereabouts
brought from his master to Bissell a
basket of fish Mr Bissell thanked
the lad and then felt in his pocket
for a quarter but his pocket was
empty of silver it contained nothing
but notes of large denomination
Thank you for the fish my boy
repeated Mr Bissell and he turned
again to his desk He thought it
hardly worth while to explain that he
had no change He doubted if the lad
was anxious enough for a tip to be
willing to ransack the neighborhood
for change for a large bill But here
the boy set him right
Mr Bissell he said excuse me
and he wriggled diffidently
Well my lad what is it
Why said the boy when I go
back home and tell Mr Cleveland that
I delivered the fish if he asks me
what you gave me what would you
like me to say to him sir
A Relic of Nero
The government has undertaken ex
cavations on the site of the Campus
Martius and has discovered remains
and foundations of the monument
erected by the Roman Senate 13 B C
under the consulship of Nero and
Quintilius in honor of the Emperor
Augustus after his victories in Spain
and Gaul
The remains now discovered to
gether with those collected in 1S50
and preserved in museums are suffi
cient to allow of the reconstruction of
the monument which is symbolic of
peace and it is hoped to complete the
work on the occasion of the Czars
visit London Mail
Southern Exports
In 1902 the exports from the South
totaled 508237000 against 472894
000 the previous year This is an in
crease for southern ports of 74 per
cent against three tenths of 1 per cent
for the other ports of the United
States Of the total exports of the
country the South originated 38 per
cent
This hill is known as the hump
It is an experiment in railroad switch
ing and its results are being watched
by transportation officials all over the
country Though it has been in op
eration only a short time it has
worked to the satisfaction of officers
of the road who say that it has not
only materially reduced the expense
of making up trains but has shrt
ened the time
The switching of a train of cars over
CURED OF BAD HABIT
Little Incident That Taught thp Youth
a Lesson
Never but once did I go to my task
with a blear That morning my
computations were so riotous and I
was so set on distributing my checks
into the wrong pigeonholes that I
went to the cashier about 11 oclock
to ask permission to go home He
looked at me keenly and said not
unkindly
Last night is responsible for this
morning Let me tell you right here
that you cant do that sort of thing
and make a banker of yourself no
matter what j our name is No keep
at your work to day make your errors
face the consequences of them even
if you are fined for them I guess
your mortification will be the best
cure for you
What a wise man he was I never
presented myself in that condition
again It was payng too much
irom The Autobiography of a Bank
Cashier in Everybodys Magazine for
October
Fad of Musical Composer
Some curious anecdotes are related
of Hermann Zumpe the Wagnerian
conductor at Munich who died sud
denly a few weeks ago He was well
known to be a spiritualist and be
liever that the ghosts of dead com
posers inspired his conducting their
works One day Zumpe told another
conductor of note how Beethovens
spirit was present during the perform
ance of one of the symphonies and so
pleased was the ghost after the end
of the first movement he exclaimed
At last Ah my dear fellow ex
claimed the other conductor surely
Beethoven made a mistake He
thought it was the end of the last
movement
New York Streets Are Crowded
Pedestrianism as a means of exer
cise grows more difficult in this city
every year The crowds on the streets
have increased until at certain times
of the day the thoroughfares which
would naturally be selected for walk
ing by men going to and from business
are too full for comfort New York
Letter
Female Clerks in London
Within the last four years the num
ber of female clerks has doubled in
London The demand is constantly
increasing and it is predicted that the
male clerk will soon be extinct
HUMP SYSTEM OF SWITCHING RAILROAD CARS
them from bumninc too hard into the
j cars on the track into which they run
When a train is seen coming over the
hump these car riders there are
about fifteen in the yard run for the
incline The cars go over the hump
rapidly and fast work is required of
the men who ride the cars As soon
as they have ridden a car to its des
tination they drop off and run back to
meet another runaway They are all
young men Their work requires ex-
United States and the one in the rail
road yard at Hawthorne 111 marks a
new era in one class of railroad work
In this yard at the west foot of the
hill is a mesh of tracks for westbound
trains Solid trains are pushed up
the east approach of the incline and
when- the cars are at the top of the
hill they are cut off one or two at a
time as the case may be and allowed
to run down the west side of the hill
Upon different tracks upon which are
the trains of which they are to form
parts
the hump is interesting An engine
is coupled to a train of cars The
train is pushed slowly up until the top
of the hump is reached Just where
the cars begin to pitch down the in
cline a switchman stands who cuts off
the cars singly or in bunches accord
ing to the trams they are to go into
Each car has been previously marked
with the number of the -track into
which it is to be dropped
Going down the incline the cars are
ridden by switchmen who regulate the
speed with hand brakes to prevent
treme agility and into it enters a
large element of danger not only in
the catching and climbing of cars but
in keeping out of the way of flying
cars on the other tracks
It is predicted by those who have
watched the work of the huvip that
in a comparatively short time there
will be a hump in every large rail
road yard in the country and that the
old method of switching cars and mak
ing up trains at grade will be done
away with except in small yards at
way stations
CASE OF SATISFIED AMBITION
Young Womans Long Wished For De
sire Gratified
Two young women were discussing
their late vacations at a well known
club for business women down town
says the New York Press Ono of
them said enthusiastically
Of course you found the scenery
inspiring but what part of your trip
did you really enjoy the most
The other woman gave vent to a
rippling laugh and replied
Well if you want to know the
truth it was my meals in the restaur
ants attached to the various stations
where I made close connections
The first speaker a confirmed trav
eler gasped incredulously but the
second continued her explanation
It was the first time in my life that
really felt free to spend money just as
I liked and I took a childish satisfac
tion in the depot restaurants not
lunch counters mind you but dining
rooms with real tables and table
cloths As a child I suffered tortures
of indigestion and mortification from
being forced to eat out of a family
lunch basket where everything had ab
sorbed the flavor of everything else
To leave that lunch basket or shoe
box at home and enter the sacred pre
cincts of a depot restaurant was one
of the ambitions of my girlhood I
presume no ambition is so small that
its gratification does not bring a cer
tain sense of exultation
A Man That Pays His Way
A mere man stepped briskly up to
the office of one of our prominent ho
tels threw down a nickel and said to
the genial clerk Please give me an
envelope and two sheets of paper
The butt end of all complaints who is
lord of all he surveys nearly fainted
As he handed out the stationery he
shoved back the cois saying No
charge sir We dont sell station
ery Then I do not want it was
the reply I am not a guest of this
hotel and do not at the moment in
tend to become such I wanted to
write a letter I should use your pen
ink and table with a chair thrown in
and very likely would be temporarily
in the way of a guest It seems to me
that a nickel is none too large a price
to pay for the accommodation He
disappeared before the clerk recov
ered his wits Well thats the first
time ever ejaculated Sir Geniality
In all my hotel experience I never
heard of anything like it Im con
founded But why not sell paper en
velopes etc We give away an enor
mous amount every year to strag
glers who never spend a dollar here
Ill mention it to the boss New
York Press
Congressional Orthography
It is a fact that not all of the mem
bers of the House are able to spell cor
rectly a failing that is less noticeable
since the employment of stenogra
phers to dispose of their mail There
was one member from Kentucky
vhose shortcomings in this respect
were well known to his associates
Knott used to have a good deal of fun
at the expense of this friend Oae day
in the cloak room he said that his
friend although a bad speller was ac
counted good in his own town Another
country lawyer had drawn up a legal
paper in which that useful and
long suffering animal was spelled
The clerk questioned the
accuracy of this and the lawyer said
We will leave it to Congressman
Smith
The latter looked the document over
seriously and asked John whj
didnt you leave off the e
Columbus
Give me white paper
This which you use is black and rough
with smears
Of sweat and grime and fraud and blood
and tears
Crossed with the story of mens sins
and fears
Of battle and of famine all these vears
When all Gods children have forgot
their birth
And drudged and fought and died like
beasts of earth
Give me white paper
One storm trained seaman listened to
the word
What no man saw he saw he heard
what no man heard
In answer he compelled the sea
To eager man to tell
The secret she had kept so well
Left blood and guilt and tyranny be
hind
Sailing still west the hidden shore to
find
For all mankind that unstained scroll
unfurled
Where God might write anew the storv
of the World
Boston Journal
Moles Different From Mountains
Girl with the Gibson Girl Neck
Did you go to that faitn healer to have
your lame shoulder cured as I sug
gested
Girl with the Julia Marlowe Dimple
Yes but as soon as I saw her I
came away She had a big mole on
her nose and I knew she wouldnt
have let that stay there if faith could
have removed it
Prohibition Territory
According to statistics recently gath
ered about 30000000 are living in
prohibition territory in this country
This is more than one third of the en
tire population In Maine Kansas and
North Dakota they have prohibition
by state law in thirty eight other
states they have it by local option
Great Tunnel
Tho twin tunnel under the capitol
at Washington which the Pennsyl
vania railway has been given permis
sion to bore will be 3000 feet long
cost 800000 and electricity is to be
exclusively used for hauling trains
through it
Murder Statistics
The number of murders per million
inhabitants is in England 513 in
many 545 in France 3155 in
tria 1542 in Italy 7611 and in Spain
4470
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i Tbe Shortest Way I
M cut cf an attack of
8 Rheumatism 1
I or Neuralgia
M Is to usa S
Which affords rot only sure relief 1
but a prompt cure It scothes M
subdues ad ends the suffering m
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Price 25c and 50c jj
Mwifirm mm m m M I IP
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WTEKS
EXCELSIOR BRAND
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KEEP THE niDER DRY
Ktn cint grt at the nan who
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PUT CP IX COLLArslBLK TTBES
A substitute for and superior to mustard or cm
other plaster and will not blister the mobt I
Ji i i it -
uuaiixxics sjwu j uc paiiiuiiajriiiK anu curauvo
qualities of this article are wonderful It will
a stop the toothache at once and relievo hem- i
3 ajhe and sciatica We recommend it as the be 1 I
U nnrl Qnff PTlpntnl rnnnir irriiTif lTitfn r
as an external remedy for pains in the clif t
3 and stomach and all rheumatic neuralgic iA
souty complaints A trial wiu prove what t t
claim for it and it will be found to bo j
abla in the household Many peonle sav it is
the best or all your preparations Price 13 a
cents at all or other dealer or by jjj
sendinc this amount to usin postaeestampswe 4
will send you a tube by mail No article shoud 9
be accepted b7 the public unless the san j 8
carntes our label as otherwise it is net ienine
CHESEBROUQH MFG CO
17 btate btrect New Yobx Citv 3
- -
Mummy round In Colorado
The discovery of tne mummy or a
cliff dweller was made last week by
Mrs Jeannette R Newcomer wife of
John Newcomer assistant states at
torney of Chicago in an excavation
made by her in a burial village in
the Grand canyon of the Colorado
The mummy was taken to Chicago
and is now at the Newcomer home
It will probably be given to a loal
educational institution The mummy
is said to be the most perfect of its
kind ever found It is that of a man
about five and one half feet tall On
one side of the head there is a mass
of soft brown hair All of the teeth
are perfect The lower portion of the
body was wrapped in a coarse sack
ing cloth The right leg below tha
knee had crumbled away
Kiplings Dsstroyed Writings
Kipling throws a good deal of hi3
work into the waste basket but it is
some time since any of it went into
such a receptacle owned by some oth
er person He feels that having won
a reputation it is his duty to writ up
to it On one occasion when in a
heroic mood he destroyed a witole
book The title of this unborn work
was Forty five Mornings After it
was finished he asked Robert Earr to
read it As good as Plain Tale-
was Mr Barrs verdict Not betfr
said Kipling I dont think it is
answered Barr Then it will never
be published was Kiplings unexpect
ed reply and it was destroyed forth
with
The babyless go cart is not yet in
vogue
HAPPY DAYS
When Friends Say How Well You
Look
What happy days are those when all
our friends say How well you look
We can bring those days by a little
care in the seiection of food just as
ihis young man did
I had suffered from dyspepsia for
three years and last summer was so
bad I was unable to attend school he
says I was very thin and my appe
tite at times was poor while again it
was craving I was dizzy and my
food always used to ferment instead
of digesting Crossness unhapp ness
and nervousness were very prominent
symptoms
Late in the summer I went to visit
a sister and there I saw and used
Grape Nuts I had heard of this fa
mous food before but never was in
terested enough to try it for I never
knew how really good it was But
when I came home we used Grape
Nuts in our household all the time and
I soon began to note changes in my
health I improved steadily and am
now strong and well in every way
and am back at school able to get
my lessons with ease and pleasure
and can remember them too for the
improvement In my mental power is
very noticeable and 1 get good marks
in my studies which always seemed
difficult before
I have no more of the bad symp
toms given above but feel fine and
strong and happy and it is mighty
pleasant to hear my friends say
How well you look Name civen
I by Postum Co Battle Creek Mich
look in eacn package for a copy
of the famous little book The Rnad
to Wellville
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