4 ' . , WHAT DOES IT MEAN ? It means it is the purest made. I Soaps , strong with alkali , will eat \ And burn the clothes , and leave them frayed , But Ivory Soap is clean and sweet. It washes out the stain and dirt , And leaves the fabric all unhurt. COPYRIGHT 1893 Br THE PROCTER It GAMBLE CO CINCINNATI Box Elder Circuit. Sunday-school at Box Elder church every Sunday at 10 a.m. Church services at ii a. ui. every two weeks dating from Sunday , Dec. 4. Sunday-school at Gar den Prairie appointment every Sunday nt loa. m. Preaching at n a. in. every two weeks dating from Dec. n. Preach ing service at Spring Creek at 3 p. m. every two weeks dating from Dec n , D. L. MATSON , Pastor. Five Cents a Copy ! That's the remarkably low price at which we are closing out the remainder of our Navy Portfolios , those superb pictures of our splendid and victorious navy. You can buy the entire series of twelve numbers for 50 cents. This is less than half price , and they are only a few sets left. = I'l ' I onarch Bicycles t * WM 4fflgS& ? ! "i * * . ii2&5- * ire roco nized Inj v/oi-lil o/cr as representing the highest type ; f c.vJwiJcnce in bicycle construction..Are now within reach of all MONARCH ROADSTERS $5O DEFIANCE ROADSTERS $35 King and Queen Roadsters $25at at these prices. " MONARCH CHAIN LESS $75 Send for Catalogue Agents wanted in open territory MONARCH CYCLE MFG. CO. Halstsd and Fulton Sts. , CHICAGO - Church and Reade Bis. , NEW YORK RIDE A MONARCH AND KEEP IN FRONT Beware of the Doctors' ' There is not the slightest doubt that the doctors do more harm than good in treating Contagious Blood Poison ; many victims of Patchwork You Can this loathsome disease would be much better ; off to-day if they had never allowed them selves to be dosed on mercury and potash , the Cure Yourself at Home. only remedies which the doctors ever give for . blood poison. The doctors are wholly unable to get rid of this vile poison , and only attempt to heal up the outward appearance of the disease the sores and eruptions. This they do by driving the poison into the system , and endeavor to keep it shut in with their constant doses of potash and mercury. The mouth and throat and other delicate parts then break out into sores , and the fight is continued indefinitely , the drugs doing the system more damage than the disease itself. ' Mr. H. L. Myers , 100 Mulberry St. , Newark , X. J. , says : 'I had spent a hundred dollars with the doctors , when I realized that they could do me no grood. I had large spots all over my bcdy , and these soon broke out into running sores , and I endured all the suffering which this vile disease pro duces. I decided to try S. S. S. as a last resort , and was soon greatly improved. I followed closely your 'Direc tions for Self-Treatment , ' and the large splotches on my chest began to grow paler and smaller , and before long disappeared entirely. I was soon cured perfectly and my skin has been as clear as glass ever since. I cured my self at home , after the doctors had failed completely. " It is valuable "time thrown away to expect the doctors to cure Contagious Blood Poison , for the disease is be yond their skill. Swifts Specific S. S. S. FOR THE BLOOD acts in an entirely different way from potash and mercury it forces the poison out of the system and gets rid of it entirely. Hence it cures the disease , while other remedies only shut the poison in where it lurks forever , constantly undermining the constitution. Our system of private home treat ment places a cure within the reach of all. We give all necessary medical ad vice , free of charge , and save the patient the embarrassment of publicity * Write for full information to Swift Specific Co. , Atlanta , Ga. A Sadly hunt Dime. When last in New York , Carnegi had a bitter experience with a inessen ger boy , whoso tardiness in delivering a business message came near upsettini a deal of great importance. Referrin ] to this incident while at dinner wit ! friends that evening , he told of an oflic boy who worked for him many year ago when he was of far less importance in the commercial world. "James , " said Mr. Carnegie , "was n willing boy , but his ability as a stnt terer was simply wonderful , and I of ten found it more convenient to at tent to little errands myself than to wait fo his explanations. One day n neigbbo wanted to send a nice note clear ucros the city , and I permitted James to carry it for him. The trip was a long one and James was gone quite three hours When he returned , I asked him how much he had charged for his services. " 'Fi-fi-fi-fi-fi-fi-fi-fifteen - - - - - - - c-c-c-centtl was the gasping reply " 'Why didn't you make it a qnar terY * I asked. " 'I ' c-c-c-c-c-conld-conld-conldu' s-9-s-s-say it , ' he replied , with tears a well as hyphens in his voice. "Right then I made up my mine never to give any one my services with out first milking sure that I conld recit my price without stuttering , and never have. " Cincinnati Enquirer The Ilcturn of tlic Ilutlou * . In the civil war our soldiers face ( privation and hunger A little story in H. Clay Trunibull'a book , "War Mem ories of a Chaplain , " tells of the spirit in which they sometimes did it While before Petersburg doing siege work in the summer of 1864 , our men had wormy hard tack served out to them. It was a severe trial to the men. Breaking open the biscuits and finding live worms in them , they would throw the pieces in the trenches , although the orders were to keep the trenches clean A brigade officer of the day , seeing some of these scraps along cur front , called out sharply to our men : "Throw that hard tack out of the trenches. " Then , as the men promptly gathered it up , he added , "Don't you know that you've no business to throw hard tack in the trenches ? " Out from the injured soldier hea there came the reasonable explanation , "We've thrown it out two or three times , sir , but it crawls back. " I'retty Lively Eating. When one grows weary of the eternal ices , blancmanges , charlottes and pud dings served to us year in and year out for dessert , it ia pleasant to hear of an innovation. A traveled American re marked that she once had the felicity of sitting down to a Japanese dinner at which were served such dainties as melons , ices , fruits and sja frogs There was in addition to these sweets a cov ered dish , into which , at the beginning of the dinner , a bottle of wine had been poured. When the sea frogs and other dainties had been discussed , the cover of this dish was removed , and a number of sandhoppers , hilariously intoxicated and jumping about in the wildest manner , were presented to the gaze of the aston ished American guests The lively de&- sert , so the fair traveler says , was caught by the Japanese with little bamboo sticks and eaten with great gusto Chinese Tortnrc. The ingenuity of the Chinese in de vising punishment for offenders sur passes that of the most cruel people of the middle ages. Some time ago a boy was kidnaped from u village about 30 miles from Chin-Kiang and brought to that city to be sold. The kidnapers were arrested and returned to the vil lage , where the people dug a hole in the ground , like a grave , about three feet deep , covered the bottom and sides with unslaked lime , placed the offend er , with his hands and feet tied upon the lime and covered his body with the same material. Then they filled the hole full of water and as the lime slacked he was roasted alive and his body consumed. The New Wny. The cannibal chief stood with his hand shading his eyes. A solitary figure was timidly creeping toward him from the jungle. Suddenly the old chief started. He took a quick step forward. "It is , " he cried , "it is my son I He is coming home again I" Then with his eyes still fixed on the slouching figure he shrilly called to his head hunter "Mbongwa , the prodigal isreturningl Kill the fatted Kaffir 1" Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Little Matter Among ; Friends. Two boys were in fighting attitude like bantams ; another and a smaller one stood watching them , wiping his eyes , sobbing the while. "What did yer hit him for V said one. " 'Tain't none of your business. ' "Yes , it is : he's my friend. " "Well , he's my friend too. " New York Commercial Advertiser An Undesired Ally. "How is Mud Slinger going to side in this race Y Is he for yon Y" " ' ' " 1 "That's what's worrying me , re plied the candidate for office. "If I ( thought he was going to be against me , [ would feel surer of election. " Col- nmbus ( O. ) State JonrnaL | His Reference. i Chief ( to commercial traveler seek i ing a place ) Do you know how to talk . up goods to customers Y Applicant Allow me to turn on this , phonograph with a conversation be- : ween a customer and myself. Flie- * ende Blatter. The title of "majesty" waa first giv- \ ; n to Louis XI of France. Before that : ime sovereigns were naually styled 'highness. " A beggar ia usually a touching ch eck Berlin ( Md. ) Herald. Folly nt the Phone. One Weflt Madison street drnggisl lost a customer through his fondness for pets. He has a largo green parrot , ani the cage is hung near the telephone , with the result thajt Polly has become quite proficient in "telephone talk" ant furnishes much amusement to the cus tomers who have the tinio to stop and listen. The other day a stylishly dressed young lady came rustling into the Htore and asked penni'-'io ! ) to use the phone. The druggist pointed to the rear of the store , and she started in that direction. The store was rather dark , and when she heard t-ouie one apparently talking into the receiver she seated herself on a chair to wait. "Hello cential hello , hello yen , give me four-clouble-eight express. Yes , hello ; who ia that ? Oh , yes ; what , yes hello , I aay ; uo , 1 didn't get that ; is that so ? Well , gcodby ; rinj , ' off Hello , central ; hello , hello : give me" and so on and so on through several repeti tious. Then she rose and advanced with a stately air to the clerk and asked if ho thought "that person" intended to use the telephone all day. "Why , that's only the parrot : he" But the front door had slammed be fore he could finish his sentence. Chicago cage Newa. Wnnt d to See Thnt Foot. On the principle that to some persona even old stories are new , this one , of the royal princelings of England , ia given in Mr. G. W. E. Russell's recent book , "Collections and Recollections : " An English gentleman who had a de formed foot was going to visit the queen at Osborne , and before hia arrival the queen and Prince Albert debated whether it would be well to warn the Prince of Wales aud the prince&s royal of hia physical peculiarity , so as to avoid their making embarrassing re marks , or to leave it to their own good feeling. The latter course waa adopted. Lord duly arrived. The foot elicited no remark from the royal children , and the visit passed off with success. Next day the princess royal asked the queen- " Where is Lord Y" "He has gone back to London , dear. " "Oh , what a pity I Ho had promised to show Bertie and me his foot ! " They had caught him in a quiet spot and made their own terms with the captive. His Hnlf Wny Scheme. Not long ago a Pittsburg lifo insur ance agent persuaded a Chinaman to take out a policy of § 3,000. The latter had no clear idea of the transaction , but understood that on paying the premiums promptly ho would be enti tled to $3,000 some time. He began bothering the agent for the money after a couple of weeks had passed , and the agent tried to explain to him that he would have to die before he could get it. The Chinaman fell down a cellar- way and was badly hurt. His frienda tried to attend to him without calling in a doctor. When they did call one in two days later , the doctor was angry. "Why didn't yon call me sooner ? " he asked. "Thia man ia half dead now. " Next day the injured man's brother waa at the insurance office with a claim for § 2,500. "You're not entitled to anything on this , " said the insurance agent , "until the man ia dead. " "Doctol say him half died , " an swered the brother "Why he no glet lathalf ? " Good Horse Sense. The Mexican burros ascertain where to dig for water by closely observing the surface of the ground. One ob server writes : "We had found water in an arroya of a sufficient quantity to make cof fee , whou we saw three burros search ing for water. They passed several damp places , cxainiuiug the ground closely , when the loader halted near us and began to paw a hole in the hot , dry sand , llavinj ? dug a hole some thing over a foot iu depth , lie backed out and watched it intently. To our surprise it soon began Jo Oil with wa ter. Then he advanced , took a drink and stepped asjde for his companions to drink.VIieu they went away , we drank from their well and found the water to be much cooler than any we had found for many a day. There is no witchcraft about Mexican burros , but they have good horse sense. " A Strniife Test of 3Iniiliood. The ancient Clan Macleocl used to exercisa a strange test to prove theman- iood of their chieftains. At Dunvegan castle , on the island of Skye , there is reserved the large horn known as 'Rory More'a Horn. " Thia capacioua vessel holds rather more than a bottle ind a half of liquor. According to the Did custom , every laird of Macleod was jbliged on his coining of age to fill this jorn with claret and without once lay- ng it down to drain it to the dregs , rbis was taken as a proof of his man- jood , and he was then deemed a worthy successor to the lairds of the past Deceitful. "Men are queer animals , " said the lessimist. "They are all more or less leceitfnl. ' "Oh , I don't believe that I" replied : he optimist "I think there are plenty jf people who strive to be honest. I ; now I do , and I don't give myself .redit for being any better than the uajority of men. " "Then why do you ask me how my icalth is every time we meet and stand iround and look bored if I tell you ? " Chicago Times-Herald. Thing's He Doesn't Knovr. Farmer Medders What's yer son Eliram goin ter do when lie gits ; hrough collegeV Farmer Corntosbcl lie's from ter itay right here on the farm till he ; orter begins ter realize that they's me or two things lie don't know. San Francisco Examiner. , ADDITIONAL PERSONALS. MRS. G. W. WII.LKTTS was a Hastings visitor , one day this week. MR * W. O. SIMONS of Oxford has been visiting in the city , this week. MRS. Rui'US Rl'SSOM returned to her home in Broken Bow , Tuesday of this \Vtek. Foieuian H. C. Smith , who has been seriously ill , is reported a little better , today. Miss MARY WATSON is here from Grand Island , the nest of Miss Mabel Wilcox. MRS. HENRY HANUEN is up from Emporia , Kansas , on a visit to relatives and friends. Miss JENNIE McCi.UNG has been up from Indianola , this week , guest of Miss Maud Wood. MRS G W BURNETT and daughter were Cambridge visitors , Thursday , be tween trains. MRS. J. F. FORHES and the children returned , this morning on I , from their visit in Canada. JOHN HATFIELD arrived from Decatnr , Illinois , the other day , and is the guest of his son James and wife. C. H. MEEKER was in Lincoln and Omaha , early part of the week. Mrs. Meeker is still in Omaha. MRS. F. W. HAWKSWORTH ami two young lady guests are spending the week visiting in the mountains. SAM PREMER and Perry Kiiinison of North Valley precinct aie in the city , today , on matters of business. MRS. AND Miss MAHONEY , who were the guests of Mrs. J. F. Kenyou , de parted for their Iowa home , last Satur day. MRS. C. E. POPE returned , last Sun day night , from Lincoln. Miss Ada Sircolumb of Sheridan , Wyoming , ac companied her. GEORGE BURGERT , high school assist ant , last year , lias been elected principal of the schools of Syracuse. THE TRIB UNE congratulates. MRS. F. M. KIMMEI.L , Master Schell and Mabel Mokko will depart in the morning , for Lincoln , to be absent a number of days. MR. AND MRS JOSEPH MCNTOSH and little son of Onarga , Illinois , arrived in the city , Wednesday , on the Enquirer special , and will visit her brothers , the Wilcox boys. MRS. D. W. LOAR and the children arrived home , Tuesday , from visiting relatives over in Kearney. Mrs. Lora Jennings , a twin sister of Mrs. Lear , ac companied them. She returns to her home in Colfax , Iowa , this evening. COLEMAN. Roy Coleman is plowing for wheat. II. 1J. Wales was on the market , Wednes day , with twelve fat hogs. Edith Coleman is helping Mrs. Alice Bidder feed the hungry threshers. Maud Coleman is spending a few days with her sister , Mrs. Gerta Wales. One field of wheat only made fifteen pounds over three pecks to the bushel. W. M. Sharp delivered ten loads of wheat in McCook , Wednesday. About 500 bushels. W. S. Uixler brought out a load oi coal , Monday. He has over 260 acres of small gram. W. M. Sharp threshed one hundred acres of wheat and got fourteen hundred and fifty bushels. Win. Divine brought out two loads of lum ber , early in the week. He is making some additions to his barn. J. W. Corner was in McCook , first of the week , w ith a load of wheat and brought out a load of coal. He expects to thresh soon. On last Sunday evening , four boys ( we can't call them men ) on horseback rode into Win. Divine's melon patch and pulled eigh teen of the largest melons. They then rode : o Mr. Seyrick's and "hollered" them up , then : o J. W. Corner's and yelled them up , then ; ast to the school-house and north to the Nicklas farm and called up W. S. Bixler , who ives there. The melons were not ripe yet. Mr. Divine has put in a good deal of time to ceep the patch clean , and it does seem that us family should have the benefit of his labor. tie says that when the melons get ripe , if hose boys will call in broad daylight , like nen , he will give them all they can eat and hey will be perfectly welcome , too. He cer- ainly shows a kind and neighborly disposi- ion in the matter. Mike Coyle informs us hat their patch was visited the same night ind the melons pulled , but they were not ripe et. lie said his mother an old , gray-haired voman , had tended the patch in the hot sun vhen she should have been resting her weary > ody. SOUTH SIDE. Plenty of rain at present. There will be a great deal of small grain own , this fall. There was a good meeting of the Endeavor , Sunday evening. Florence Johnston will attend school in rlcCook , the coming term. Attention ! South Side Endeavorers ! There's a great day coming. " Julia Sly expects to teach the school in the ohnston district the coming term. There will be seven months school in the ritch school house , commencing the 4th of ieptember. Mrs. Frank EveriEtMrs. Lottie Brewer and fie children were visitors in South Side on Wednesday of last week , the guests of Mrs. Villaid Dutton. MKA AXLE CREASE helps the team. Saves -wear and expense. Sold everywhere HADE BY STANDARD OIL CO. The Best Remedy for Flux. Mr. John Muthias. a well known stock dealer of I'ulaski , Ky , smys : "After suf fering for over a week with flux , and uiy physician having failtd to relieve me , I was advised to try Chamberlain's Colic , Cholera and Duinhoea Remedy , and have the pleasure of .suiting that the half of one bottle cured me. " For sale by McConnell & Hrrr\ . To Cure a Cold in One Day. Take Laxative Hroino Quinine Tablets. All druggists lefund money if it fails to cure. 250. The genuine has L. B. Q. on each tablet. The Rev. W H C.-tley. of Stock- bridge , Ga , while auerding t > his pas toral duties at EUeiiwooil , that state , was attacked by eliolna tnorbus. He says ; "By chance I happrm il to get heM of a bottle ol Chamberlain'- . Colic , Chol * era and Diarrhoea Remedy , and I think it was the means of saving my life. It relieved me at once " For bale by McConnell - Connell & Berry. About one month ago my child , which is fifteen months old , had an attack of diarrhoea accompanied by vomiting. I gave it such remeuies as are usually given in such cases , but as nothing gave relief , we sent for a physician and it was under his care for a week. At this time the child had been Mck for about ten days and was having aMout twenty five operations of the howtls every twelve hours , and we were convinced that un less it soon obtained relief it would not live. Chamberlain's Colic , Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy was recommended , and I decided to try it I soon noticed a change for the bettei ; by its continued use a complete cure was. brought about and it is now * perfectly healthy C. L. Boggs , Stutnptown , Gilmrr Co. . W. Va. For sale by McConnell & . Berry. ATSUNDOWN YOU WILL FIND COMFORT IN A ifflJTUS | ( H CIGAR A.DAVIS'SONS a CO. MAKERS JOHN G.WOODWARD8cCO. WHOLESALE DISTRIBUTERS ' COUNCIL BLUFFSIOWA- ' McCook Transfer Line J. H. DWYER , Proprietor. jSgF Special attention paid to hauling fumituie. I > ave orders at either lumber yard. OINTMENT CURES HOTHIHG BUT PILES. A SURE and CERTAIN CURE known for 15 years as the BEST REMEDYfor PILES. SOLD BY A3LI. DRUGGISTS. IKA2SSKT HS3. CO. , ST. L3UTJ. B JB Pw Ew P .cj . gwBg . At MCCONNELL & BEREY'S. Develop IUUK clew , nerve * and brain * and make a man of yourself Send for one of our Doctor's Question blanks. J o two case' * treated alike. $ > exual iveak- ii e M H , J o M M of p o ir c r. drains after stools , pre- maturedlscharRe. Varlcocelectiredor no charge. Where you are suffering from effects of melt H b ii M c we are pleased to say that we are today the only firm -who can guarantee a cure . - ; with our Turkish L M We never fall to cure no et BLOOD POISON gJ HAHN-3 PHARMACY. OMAHA. NEB. "