LINES TO THE SETTING SUN.
Orb who beheld the travail of the world 1
Beheld it , ocean-robed , an azure ball ,
Coruscant in the chrism of thy beams !
Beheld the earthquake-breathing continents
Upheave their mountain-spines from the
sphered seal
To whom the lives of races are but heart
throbs !
Weak as we are and mighty as thou art.
There are preat thoughts that flre our tran
sient dust
Which are commensurate with time and
space 1
So old thy birth seems almost now 1 To whom
The building of the sky was yesterday I
On whom the cataract t > f ages falls
With less effect than even's crystal dew
Upon a mountain's adamantine steeps !
And who will still be in their infancy
When the tired stars shall totter from their
thrones ,
And thou , thyself , painting yon western
clouds
Into a conflagrating Eden , shall ,
lev and black be sunk in the debris
Of a disintegrated universe !
Franklin E. JJenton , in the Current.
FOOLED HIS HOTEEE.
Billy Brand's mother stepped out of
her little house after breakfast to go
away for her day's sewing. Billy was
busy with hammer and nails in a corner
of the shed.
. _ "What are you doing , Billy ? " she
asked.
"Oil , nothin' . "
"Billy , I want to know before I go.
You must tell me this minute. "
She spoke in a tone half suspicious ,
half complaining. Billy locked up with
out the scowl it might have seemed to
provoke.
"Why , mother , I'm going to April
fool Sue the kind you ever
saw. "
Mrs. Brand's heart sank , if a thing
can be said to sink which is very far
down already. She had forgotten it was
the 1st day of April and Saturday.
Where might not all the tricks and
pranks sure to be conjured up by
Billy's active brains and carried out
by his restless limbs lead him by
night ?
"Billy , don't do it. Don't now , do
anything to torment Susie while I'm
gone : She's feeling bad to-day , I
know , for I saw her crying wh'en she
tried to move 'round. JNow , Billy ,
promise me you'll let that alone , what
ever it is. "
She pointed toward his work , which
lie had hidden from view. Billy shook
his head stoutly.
-I couldn't "do that , mother ; but
don't you be scared I won't do any
thing bad to Sue. "
He jumped up and kissed her as he
spoke , a procedure which so astonished
her that , with another warning , she
went off , with fewer misgivings than
she had felt before.
Billy worked away very busily for an'
hour. He was skillful with tools , and
by the time he-held up his work it was
quite worthy of the approving nod and
smile he gave as he said to himself :
"That'll do. Wonder what she'll
say ! "
It was three small shelves rather
cleverly made of pine boards , hung to
gether by leather straps. The edge of
each shelf was finished with a trimming
made of strips of red flannel which he
had found among his mother's carpet
rags. Pinked with a pair of scissors
and nailed on with common silver-plated
tacks set at regular intervals , it gave
then : an appearance of neatness which
highly delighted Billy.
"Real style about it ! " he again re
marked to himself , as he carried it to
ward the hose. "Now , if lean only
get it in without her seeing "
Peeping cautiously in at tlie door , he
watched until lie saw Susie go .with
slow and painful steps into the small
bed-room which opened off the kitchen.
Darting noiselessly in , he hung the
shelves on a nail which he had driven
when a favorable chance had offered a
few days before. Then witli hasty
.movements he brought a few of his sis
ter's books and laid on one of the
shelves her work basket , and lastly a
few pansies which he had gathered in
a neglected bed in the garden. All
these arranged to his full satisfaction ,
he waited for the sound of the hesitat
ing steps returning , and shouted :
"April fool ! "
Susie gave a little scream and 'said
peevishly :
"Oh , you tease ! You gave me such
a start Why Billy ! "
Her eyes fell on the shelves , and
Billy , with his stumpy little 'figure
drawn to its full height , watched with
keen eyes and lost not a ray of sur
prise and pleasure which lighted up her
face.
face."Billy , did you do it ? "
"Yes" " a little sheepishly , as she put
her arms about his neck.
-Why did you ? "
"Oh , I'm so awfully sorry when it
hurts you to walk. And I seen one of
them things down to the book store ,
only 'twas shiny and got up stylish ;
and I thought if you had such a one
you could keep lots of things handy
right by you , and wouldn't have to hurt
your "foot gettiu' up. Taint very
smooth , you see. Deacon Todd's old
plane wouldn't work worth a cent. "
"It's a beauty. " Susie looked down
at her poor crooked foot without a fret
ful scowl for the first time , perhaps ,
since the cruel hurt had come to it
years ago , saying softly :
' ' it for if I
' You wouldn't a' done me
hadn't been lame. Billy ? "
B lly shuffled his feet , took a few
lounging steps about the kitchen , poked
at the fire , gave , the wood-box a kick ,
and then went to his sister with a face
that showed that something lay heavy
on his mind.
"Sue , I've been well thinkin' . The
tallest kind of thinkin' , Sue "
"Oh ! " said Sue , in rather a disap
pointed tone.
"You see , " Billy scratched his head ,
reached 'up to make sure the shelves
hun evenly , and went on , laboriously ,
"I want to turn over a new leaf Sue.
The biggest kind of a leaf.
He gazed anxiously at her , as if ap
pealing for her help to go on. She
wanted to help him.
Why , what made vou thivk of that ,
"Oh , sornethm' . . You see last Sun-
day goin' to school I .tripped up Jim "
Pratt leastways I went to trip up Jim"
Pratt , and he "tripped me up instead
( I'll bo up to him next time , though ! ) ,
and gave me the awfulest big whack
on the head , and then Iliad a headache ,
so I didn't feel like pokin' the boys , nor
pullin' their hair nor nothin' iii Sun
day-school jest had to sit still and lis
ten. And crackv " , Sue , if you'd heard
Mr. Hay talk "
"How , Billy ? "
"Oh , solemn. Looked right
through ana through a chap , arid put
his voice down low , and say boys that
don't look out for tKe'r mothers ain't
worth a red-cent no , he didn't just say
that , but somethin' like it and that if
they ever mean to do it , now's their
time , for some day she'll be gone away
the lirst thing you know , and you won't
hear her voice , and there woVt be no
one to think you're a tip-top chap for
all you're the tormentinest chap you
ever see. And just about that time
they'd give their eyes to have a chance
to make up for it , and they cau't make
her hear , 'cause she'll be" his voice
grew husky and he found it hard to go
on "she'll bo under the sod and
what'llyou do then ? "
Billy choked and gulped , and went
and crammed such a wasteful amount
of wood into the stove that Sue quietly
rejoiced in seeing the lire quite smoth
ered out.
"What are you going to do about it ,
Billy ? " asked Sue , when Billy seemed
to have said his say.
"Well , I'd like "to be a man at one
jump , and dig in a coal rnintvor set up
a big store , or be a governor , or some-
thin . But he said a lot more , about
how we can't do big things , and how
little things went ever so far and would
make her very heart sing. And I ain't
goin' to play any more shines , Sue.
I'm goin' to keep plenty of wood cut
and the box full and the kindlin's dry ;
and I'm goin' to fix up things a bit for
her yes , I am ! What do you think
she'd say , now , if she should find the
garden all straightened out when she
comes home ? "
"I think she'd sav , ' 'twas pretty
nice , Billy. ' "
"And how do you guess she'd look if
the old fence was mended , hey ? "
"Smiling Billy. "
"And the wood piled and the walks
swep' up ? "
"Billy , you'll get tired before its half
done and be off with the boys. "
She was wiser than she knew in
saying this , for if anything had been
needed to put a final "brace to Billy's
resolutions , these doubting words would
have done it. He said no more , but
made a dash out into the little front
yard. His forlorn , unkempt hair
matched every other feature almost
enough to account for the discouraged
and woe-begone look always on his
mother's face , as she stitched away ,
with little time for anything else. Sue's
was no brighter , for the poor girl found
life a weariness in the neglected home
which , through her sad weakness , was
unable to improve.
Billy borrowed a wheelbarrow , hunt
ed up a spade , rusty through long dis
use and needed a rake. Alter gather
ing up and carrying away a load or
two of rubbish and last year's dead
weeds and leaves , he began carefully
digging , and before long gave a shout
which brought Susie to the door.
"Look , Sue , here's your pinej's just
peepin' out of the ground. See their
tops ? No , I won't 'cut 'em. And see
what lots more pansy blows I've found
under these leaves. And your rose
bush is bundin' see ! I'm goin' to set
mother's geranium right in the middle
of this round bed. Won't she open
her eyes , though ! "
The beaming April sun shone cheer
fully down on Billy as he went on with
his labor of love. And the soft breeze
fanned his cheek , seeming to whisper
something like the words he had heard ,
telling him that nothing sweeter could
ever come into his life than the joy of
showing tender care to those he loved
and who loved him , and who stood in
such need of all he could do for them.
And the early shoots seemed to smile
and nod up at him in their soft green ,
until he tried to fancy he could almost
hear them say :
"Go on , Billy , my boy ! Do your best ,
and we'll do our share. "
„ Going into dinner , he found Sue in
spired by his example to the extent of
quite a vigorous scouring up of the
things of the house.
"Why didn't you wait till I could
help you ? " he said. "It must have
hurt you to do all this. "
"Why , I didn't half feel it ; it seemed
so good , somehow , to see things look
ing nice outside. I didn't want to be
put to shame , you know. "
In the afternoon the boys came and
worried him. His very feet tingled to
scamper after Jim Pratt and pay him
for last Sunday. And it was tantaliz
ing to hear of tricks successfully play
ed.
ed.The
The bricks tied up and laid on the
sidewalk , the dime with a string , the
lish-hook to catch passing hats all
the small pranks dear to the heart of
the average boy were a sore tempta
tion to Billy.
But his heart had been very deeply
stirred in this matter of trying to'atone
to his mother for his pastwaywardness ,
and he manfully stuck to his wood-pile.
The garden was a little beauty spot ,
the fence mended , and things in order
to the very corners , when Billy sat
'
down on the steps with aching 'limbs
and a lame back , but with a heart and
face very full of satisfaction , to watch
for his mother's return.
"I don't see , " said Sue. "why you
call it an April fooling. . This ain't the
kind of thing I call April fooling. "
"Well , Sue , mother thinks I've been
cutting up the worst all day long. You
know she does. She thinks I've been
turning things upside down and wrong-
side out Now , when she looks
'round" Billy gave a comprehensive
wave of his hand "don't you believe
she'll be pretty badly fooled ? Hi , there
she comes ! Keep quiet now , Sue , and
see if I ain't right. "
Billy crept to the corner of the fence
and shouted :
"April fool ! "
Mother came in and looked in aston
ishment from one bright and orderly
thing to another , taking in every detail
and realizing the amount of effort which
had been necessary to the bringing
about of such a changed condition of
things.
IF *
And as the astonished expression
-united itself .to one of pleasure and
gratification , the two seemed to grow
and increase until not an inch of room
was left for the discouraged look , which
seemed to fall away like a heavy cloud
before the June sunshine. Sue. was
obliged to own that Billy was right.
A Consistent Editor.
A journalistic friend of mine who
worked on The New York Witness un
der John Dougall , that queer old
Scotchman , who died the other day.
.tells how conscientious a man he was.
The Sunday newspaper he regarded as
the mightiest weapon of the modern
devil. But unlike a good many ene
mies of the first day press , he was con
sistent in his godliness. The venera
ble editor did not raise a cry against
the Sunday paper on moral grounds
and at the same time give his approval
to the morning issue of Monday , the
work of which is mostly performed on
the holy day. In his olliee , when The
Witness was a daily , there was a strict
prohibition of labor from midnight
Saturday to midnight Sunday. As a
consequence , of course , the paper of
Monday morning was a makeshift af
fair , put together in a hurry and infer
ior in all respects to its contemporaries ,
a lack in quality which finally drove it
to the wall. Mr. Dougall , however ,
chose that if he could not run a news
paper without sacrificing his convictions
of right according to his personal
lights he would not remain in the
field. Then he suspended the publica
tion of the religious daily. It was said
to have been an odd sight about The
Witness establishment Sunday night ,
between 10 and 12 o'clock , when the
editors , printers , and pressmen hung
outside the doors waking for the mid
night toll of Trinity , idling the time
away in light talk and occasional dissi
pation. As the old gentleman himself
did not visit the oflice on Sunday , edi
tors who had work on hand did it out
side , or stole a march jm the absent
zealot by going to their desks at 11
o'clock , a conspiracy to which the fore
man of the office was privy , his practi
cal experience teaching him that such
a thing as getting out a paper on Mon
day morning , according to the strict
letter of the lawwas impossible. By
and by the whole office began to clip
oft' the fag end of Sunday night for nec
essary work , a disobedience of orders
which , when discovered , provoked from
Mr. Dougall a severe reprimand. The
order of things he laid down was in
consistent with .good journalism , but
consistent , and rarely so , with his own
high-minded conception of human duty.
Syracuse ( N. Y. ) Standard.
The Mortality From Consumption.
Within the past year the civilized
world has been shocked and saddcned
by the knowledge of the great devasta
tion wrought by the cholera in Spain ;
and every precaution , in the way of
sanitary measures and quarantine regu
lations , that modern science could sug
gest , was taken to prevent its spreading
into other countries. The public
scanned the columns of the daily press ,
eager for information with regard to
the advance of this fearful disease , and
read with bated breath as they learned
that it numbered its victims by the tens
of'thousands.
If it was a matter of such deep and
universal concern that in Spain 101,000
souls gave up their lives to this fell de
stroyer , should it not also be a matter
of some interest to our people that ,
within the borders of these United
States , over 91,500 persons dje each
year of pulmonary consumption ? that
twelve out of every hundred deaths are
caused by a disease which , though slow
in its progress , is as sure in its results
as cholera itself ?
Should it ever transpire that some
means of prevention should be found ,
by means of which people would be ren-
tlered proof against the disease , or at
least could be cured when once it had
set its seal upon them , would it not be
one of the-greatest boons vouchsafed to
man since the introduction of vaccina
tion ?
Inventive persons have from time to
time thought that they had secured a
sure cure , if not an unfailing prop hylacS
tie ; and , at the present time , since the
discoveries of Koch , all sorts of parasi
ticides are being used to kill the germ
of the disease. The unfortunate bacillus
is now being huttted down with pneu
matic chambers , deep inhalations , and
local applications introduced by means
of the hypodermic syringe , with results
that are , to say the least , uncertain.
But , after all the years of research
devoted to the subject , and out of all
the methods of prevention and cure
that have been suggested , the one that
has given the best results , and is now
being universally adopted , is change of
climate. Popular Science Monthly.
A Mexican Pawn Shop.
In the city of Mexico the government
runs a big pawnshop , where money is
loaned on collateral at six per cent.
There is a professional appraiser con
nected with the concern , and if he ap
praises an article for more than it will
bring if sold at anct'on , he must take
it himself or make good the loss. We
have thought , how would it work to
have a professional appraiser of men's
value ? Were he skillful'in balancing
merits and demerits , how disgusted
some men would be to discover the
wide difference between the appraiser's
estimate of them and their own inflated
idea of themselves. Unless the ap
praiser was very careful many of them
would be thrown on his hands after
being weighed in the public balance.-
Texas Sijlings.
In a Doubtful State.
Lawyer "Are you single ? "
Female witness "No. "
Then you are a married woman ? "
"No. "
"So you are a widow ? "
"No. "
"But , my dear Madame or Miss , you
must belong to one of these classes.
As what shall I put you down ? "
"I am an engaged woman , "
Texas Siftinas.
A MARINE COFFER DAM.
The "Work of Repairing tlio Steam
ship AVcrra at South Boston.
The ocean steamship Werra , which
was disabled in her recent passage to
this country by the breaking of her
shaft , is in the New England dock at
South Boston for repairs , says The Bos
ton Advertiser. The shaft was broken
short off at the outside of the stern
post , and the propeller and that part of
the shaft which extended outside the
stern post fell out and were lost. The
repairs to be made , accordingly , con
sist in putting in a new prrpeller and a
new shaft of the full length , which is
twenty-four feet.
The shaft has been ordered by cable to
be shipped at once from Germany and
the propeller from Liverpool. The
foimer is on board the steamship
Donau , which is due in New York on
the 25th inst. , and the propeller is ex
pected to arrive on the Liverpool steam
er due on the 28th. It will take at
least one damore to forward these from
New York. The intervening time will
not be more than comfortably sufficient
to remove the remnant of the old shaft
and make such adjustments as will be
necessary for putting the new appar
atus into place expedilicusly. Ten or
twelve days from the present time will
probably elapse before the vessel is
ready for the sea.
This work of restoration is of special
interest because it is to be done by
means of a coffer dam. Notwithstand
ing that Boston is praised , and justly ,
for the manT facilities which the port
offers for ocean steamer trailic , one
very * important matter is lacking , and
that is a dry-dock long enough to con
tain a first-class ocean steamer. The
Werra is 450 feet long. The longest
dry-dock is that belonging to the
United States government at the Char
leston navy-yard. This is but 370 feet
long. It was planned and its construc
tion was begun in 1827 , and at that
time the idea that the merchant service
would ever surpass the naval service in
the length of its ships was doubtless
quite out of the range of the mind's
vision. In the absence of a dry-dock
a coffer dam can be made to serve very
well in the work now to be done , but
the use of it is somewhat of a novelty ,
to the general public at least , and a
good many people visited the dock yes
terday , prompted by curiosity about
the coffer dam.
The dam is a structure of strong
timbers and planks , and its shape or
form is that of the bottom , two sides ,
and one end of a square wooden box.
The bottom is settled Ifv enough in
the water to pass under t.io ke : l of the
? hip as she lies afloat. It is set under
the keel about half the length of the
coffer dam. Chains arc dropped from
the after bulwarks of tin * ship , and are
hooked to the sides of the dam near
the upper edge , and drawn perfectly
taut by mems : of a combined shackle
and screw attached to e.ch chain. All
being well secured , the operation of
putting in the bulkhead of the dam is
begun. This , when in p'ace , will make
the other end of the bo-c already de-
ser.bed as having two sides and only
one end.
This end or bulkhead is built in two
parts and the ini er edge of each part
is shaped to fit exactly the convex and
concave line of the vessel's hull below
the water. In the piesent instance
this shape has to be ascertained by tak
ing molds of the interior of the hull at
the proper distance from the stern port ,
making allowance for th ckness of the
vessel's iron plating. Some aid in
making a tight joint against the ship's
smooth side comes from putting a lay
er of sail cloth or like material into the
bulkhead .is a part of its construction.
This part of the work of shaping the
edges of the bulkhead vss well done ,
and both parts were soon put into
place and held there by the diagonal
thrust of timbers or joist secured
against the inner sides of the dam. Be
fore the work of pumping out was be
gun , or before it had progressed far ,
shores were set resting at one end upon
the bottom and what may be called the
gunwale of the coffer-dam and against
the ship's hull at the other end.
The tug-boatj William Sprague be
gan the work of pumping out , .and
latter in the day the lug Curlew was
also engaged. The water in tlm dam
is drawn out through huge pieces of
suction hose , these being connected
with the pumps of the tug boats.
With the withdrawal of the water with
in the dam , an immense upward and
lateral pressure is mudiby the water
without , and the joint of the bulk
head against the ship's s < le by the pres
sure becomes practical iv water-tight.
When the coffer dam is free of water ,
a hose attached to one of the pumps of
the steamship will keep it clear without
difficult } * .
The work of putting the coffer dam
into position was begun at 8 A. M.
yesterday , and by 4:30 P. M. the dam
was sufficiently clear of water to ex
pose the ship's stern nearly to the
depth of the keel. Theend of the
broken shaft was visible. It was made
with a hollow core of ion inches di
ameter , and was of rough steel. The-
strength was of course , very great ,
but the question was debated somewhat
by the seafaring men present whether
it would not have been stronger if
wroughtsolid. The depth of the bulk
head from its gunwale is twenty feet ,
its width is thirty feet , and its length
feet. The of the
thirty-five sweep pro-
pelle'r blades corresponds to a circle of
twenty-two feet diameter.
A Plain , Simple Man.
"Gentlemen , " ' he said to the report
ers , as the sheriff put the knot where
it would do the most good , , "will you
grant me one last request before I
die ? "
The reporters , to a man , said they
would.
"Then write me down as having been
simply 'hanged , ' not 'launched into
eternity. I'm no dude. "
The request caused some consterna
tion among the younger reporters , but
they all kept their word. Xcw York
Sun.
" "Well but if ' Dub
First "Wayfarer , you're a
lin jnan how came you to be bora in Cork ? "
Second Ditto "Sure itnas just Ihij I was
stavimr there at the toime. " Judy.
GRANITE.
How It Is Quarried and Prepared foi
Use "Whore the Stono Comes
Prom.
A reporter of Tha Cincinnati Sun , in
an interview with an old-time contract
or obtained the following information
in regard togranite : "In the first
place , granite appears to be the funda
mental rock of the earth's , crust , and is
nearly always found'in its perfect state
in mountainous regions. To ho sure , it
is occasionally found as the superficial
rock in fiat or rolling plainsbut most al
ways is found in hills and mountains.
It is the hardest to get of any of the
more valuable of the building rocks ,
but when uncovered and opened up is
comparatively easy to work into rough
shapesbut polishing is another matter. "
"How is it discovered ? "
"Generally it crops out on the face of
a clifi'high up on a hill or mountain ,
hundreds of feet above convenient ave
nues of travel. The lirst thing to be
done is to climb up and skin tiie quarry
that is , strip off the sod and soil and
blast out a ledge for the workmen.
Then the hunt for seams and fissures
to lessen the work of blasting. Some
times acres upon acres have to be
"
skinned before" single seam or crack
can bo found. But when they find a
seam they have solved the problem of
quarrying because the seams show
which way the granite will work most
easily. "
"Then granite has grain ? "
"Yes , a sort of grain enough.any
how , to make it split accurately by
proper manipulation. Frequently the
seayhs traverse in parallel lines , in
which case the workmen have a com
parative picnic. First he drills long
rows of holes from three and a half
inches to ten feet in depth and from
live to ten inches apart. "
"Then he blasts it out and that's all
there is of it ? "
"Scarcely. When he has drilled
around a section ten or twenty feet
wide by forty to eighty long he takes
a lot of half round irons , pointed like
the drills , and sets them in the holes in
pairs , fiat sides together , of course.
Next he sets in his feathers , which are
nothing but small , slender , and very
tough steel wedges. He goes along
with a light hammer anil begins driv
ing in his wedges with equal fcree , so
that the strain increases evenly all
along the line. Prettv soon there is a
sharp report and the big granite rec
tangle jumps up out of its bed with a
deep hollow on its under surface , there
being no means of getting at the bot
tom center with half rounds and feath
ers. "
"Is the granite then hauled to the
cities to be worked up ? "
% "No. Do you suppose they have
derricks up there on the mountains big
enough to lift two or three thousand
tons ? The same process is renewed
along the 'grain' to break the stone
into long strips , and it is then broken
apart laterally by sharp tools and ham '
mers. Of course there is enormous'
waste , but when granite is found at all
there is generally an abundance of it ,
so it isn't much of an object to save it.
The difficulty in working it is what
makes ic cost. The granite blocks used
in these streets are worked down from
the great rectangular masses just as I
have said. "
"Where does our paving granite
come from , to be definite ? "
"llockport and Quincy , Mass. , and
the coast of Maine are furnishing the
most of what we are using here ; but
fine paving and building granite is
found in the Thousand islands and in
New Brunswick. "
"How is it shipped ? "
"Pretty much as it's laid on the side
walks , only not in as great a bulk. A
box-car will hold 1.300 blocks , which
are worth only about $120 a car. So
you see the railroads get a mighty fat
thing out of the transportation , as
compared with the value of the stuff. "
"Where is the finest granite found ? "
"Aberdeen , Scotland. That is the
red granite , which is full quartz. It
takes on a magnificent polish , but
you've probably noticed that they don't
carve it elaborately. If a man wants
a monument of Scotch granite to hold
his cadaver down he must be satisfied
with very quiet designs. But it holds
its sharp edges , when they'ie onee on ,
for ages , almost. The Egyptians had
the granite business down to a finer
point than any other people on the
round earth. They weren't satisfied
with shining it up , but they carved it
and worked it as a baker works ginger
bread.
"Another thing the people don't
generally know , is that many of the
so-called precious stones are nothing
but quartz one of the principal con
stituents of granite. Agate , amethyst ,
carnelian , cat's-cye. chalcedony , geode ,
and jasper are all quartz formations ,
and our pleasure traps and garbage
carts are trundling over acres of such
rubbish every day. Yet people call us
Cincinnatians stingy. Science found
a way to counterfeit these stones in
paste , though , just about the same
time she discovered how common is
the natural article , so that the market
is surfeited with both , and neither is
wanted. 'Brazilian peddie'spectacles
are made from quartz , and California
diamonds , when not artificial , are
worked from large , clear masses of
quartz , wh.ch are found in Madagas-
He Carried the Convention.
"Well , Charley , did you ask for the
hand of old Slickmore's daughter , last
night ? "
"You bet I did. I secured the nom
ination on the first ballot. " '
"So you are to be married soon. "
"No , siree. "
"What ! "
"It's a fact"
"I thought you said you secured the
nomination ! "
I did. The old man gave me my
choice between the toe of his boot and
the mouth of his dog , and I nominated
the boot , but they gave me the dog by
acclamation. Fact is I scooped the
whole convention. If you don't believe
it look at my pants ! They look like
they had been through a threshing
machine , but they didrrt go near half
way through the dog. " Newman In
dependent.
BIG
Eminent English Doctors Whoso In
Glad
comes Arc Enormous
stone's Physlcnln.
"Do London doctors earn more than
queen's counsel ? " As a rule they do \
not , writes a London correspondent of \
The Philadelphia Press but the incomes
of the threeleadingphysicians , and those Si ;
of the throe leading lawyers arc about
equal that is to say , at the rate of $6
* '
000 a year each. The largest sum over
earned in one year by a doctor was $100-
000 , made by Sir Astley Cooper. Tho
three men at the head of the medical
profession in England at the present
day are Sir William Jcnner , the court !
physician , Sir William Gull , and Sir
Andrew Clark. Just lately the last-
named has obtained considerable noto-
rietv. He was induced to visit a very
wealthy lady at Nice , and ho received
the unprecedented fee of $25,000. One-
fifth of this amount he retained as a re
muneration for his services , and the
remainder he divided between two char
itable institutions connected with hin
profession.
Speaking of fees , there is a tale told
of a rich colonial gentleman living in
Kent who had the misfortune to take a
slight cold. Not satisfied with his local
medical attendant he desired to have
Gull down from London in consulta
tion. Gull happened to be away an < S
Sir William Jenner came instead. Ho
was duly paid his fee of $375 for tliw
visit. The patient , feeling no better ,
then sent to Edinburgh to a leading
doctor of that city , who traveled the
four hundred miles in order to see him ,
and in ordinary course received a
guinea for every mile , that was four
hundred guineas , or $2,100. Again
the patient felt no better , and this timo
Gull was summoned and attended.
"I suppo'se , " suggested the local
practitioner , "you. will pay Gull what ,
you paid Jenner 75 ? "
Nonsense , " indignantly retorted tlio
sick gentleman , " 1 am not going to
pav Gull less than I have the Scotch
man. " and he drew a check for $2,100.
Before he got nil of his cold he had
paid $7,000 in fees.
Gull himself relates a story of an ec
centric patient , upon whom in the days
when chloroform or el her was never *
used , he performed a difficult operation
from which the old gentleman recov
ered. But he refused to pay Gull h"
fees , and , as the doctor left the be Irooin
in an enraged slate. , the old man
snatched off his night-cup , and , flinging
it at him. cried : Take that ; I'll gtvo
you nothing more. "
Gull picked up the night-cap , and ,
cooling down in his brougham , he com
menced to i"ip up the lining. Concealed
therein he found a cr.sp Bank of Eng
land note for 1,000. This story , by
the way , has also been told of several
other eminent doctors. Gull began
life in an humble way as assistant to a
hospital lecturer at 35 shillings per
week. When admitted to practice his
first year's fees amounted to $2:15 : , but
he himself says that each year they in
creased by one-third. He is a man of
dry humor. Once the bishop of Dcrry
consulted him , and the great doctor
gravely said :
"You must go to Nice , my lord. ' '
"Jh , I can't go to Nice ; I'm too
busy. "
"It must be either Nice or heaven , "
was the doctor's retort.
"Oh , then. " quick ] v added the divine ,
"I'll go to Nice. "
"I will not question your judgment , "
replied Gull. "As a right reverened
prelate you ought to know which is the
preferable place. "
Sir Andrew Clark is GladstoneV phy
sician. He accompanied him , tm the
cruise the premier took with Tennyson ,
and again last year to Norway. Ho
does not do this as a personal tribute ,
but as a matter of professional duty.
Gladstone is very testy , faddy , and au
tocratic. Clark is equally firm. Lady
Clark is quite incensed when Gladstone
orders li'er husband to spend with him
those two months of the year when the-
great physician is accustomed to have
most leisure. It is said that Jenner
and Gull are chosen to attend royal
patients in preference to Clark because
the latter is so closely identified
with Gladstone.
Advantages of Politics.
Politics is a career which is at least
free from that drudgery of the profes
sions and the anxieties and failures of
trade. It is a life livelier than that of
the country gentleman ; more manly ,
more wholesome ( and , of course , infin
itely more respectable ) than that o *
the literary man ; honester than that > ol
most parsons. It may lead to almosa
anything except failure. In politics
there , practically speaking , are no fail
ures to those who play the game.
About the worst thing that can happen
to a man in parliament is to be bored ,
and if he is bored he can go to sleep , or
into the smoking-room. But public
life is not all boredom by any means.
On the contrary , it provides , for those
who care for such things , a good deal
of pleasant social intercourse and much
interesting gossip. A man may be
constantly in the public eye , and in th
receipt of a good income from the state ,
and yet get his rubber pretty nearly
every evening. If he has a wife ( and
does not take her to the ladies' gallery )
she will think more of him than if he
was a mere lawyer or doctor. If h&
has daughters they will go to more
balls than they would if their father
was not in the public line , and better
balls , too. and meet more eligible
partners. If he has sons he can enjoy
the supreme satisfaction of jobbing for
"
them. Certainly it is. all things "con
sidered , not a bad life that of the prac
tical politician. There are , however ,
two sorts of men whom it does not suit.4
These are the patriot and the man of
genius. Such often break their hearts
over the business. London Iruth.
At the Seaside.
"Have you bathed yet this summer ? "
"Yes. I've bath'ed several times out at
Coney Island. "
"How did you find the water ? "
"Find the water ? Why , you can't
miss it. It's all around.the island. "
Texas Siftinas.