THE CHILDLESS HOME.
All ! lie was boinle , and brave , and
My only darling. my little Jim !
With a wealth of love in his loyal heart .
For the world all new to him.
But he Fcarcely entered Its open door ,
He nothing knew of its gain or loss ,
He never had hattled with toil or sin ,
Or lifted a heavy cross.
But straight from his Innocent joyous play ,
With never a shadow or thought of fear ,
The nngcls took him to live with them ,
And I I am lonely here. .
J fondle his stockings and pretty kilts ,
And the curls once shorn from his restles !
head.
For mothers grow strange and fanciful
When their little boys are dead.
And so I listen with bated breath ,
As a child's fleet footsteps patter near ,
Or a shout rings out on the summer air ,
And dream my boy Is here.
But never at morning , noon , or dusk ,
By night or day does the dream come true ;
No path leads back from the portals fair
His feet have pattered through.
Only to rock him at twilight hour ,
And fold him safe in his downy bed ;
To linger the oft-told stories o'er ,
And hear his night prayer said.
Only to look at his hazel
Peeping from under the battered brim
Of his misused hat , or to hear his laugh ;
But the house is still and prim.
Never a trample of muddy boots ,
Or whittling scattered over the floor ;
No litter of toys on the kitchen shelf ,
Or raid on the pantry's store.
But only a desolate , darkened house ,
That mourns in silence for little Jim
He will never , never return to me ,
But I I shall go to him 1
Lillian Grey.
THE COBBLESBURY BURGLARS ,
Mr. Cobblesbury came home to sup
per looking very grave , and sat down
to the table with one hand firmly press-
' ed over his breast pocket.
' What have you got in your pocket ,
pa ? " inquired the eldest daughter , Miss
Emelinc.
"Hush , breathed Mr. Cobblesbury ,
as he felt in his pocket for the thir
teenth time in five minutes. "Burg-
Jars ! "
"Burglars in your pocket , pa ? " cried
inquisitive Marmaduke Cobblesbury ,
aged fourteen.
"No. son , " said Mr. Cobblcsbury ,
gravely ; "but I have $500 which John
Spriggs paid me after banking hours
to-day , and it is highly probable that
our house may be visited by burglars
. "
to-night.
Mr. Cobblcsbury looked so solemn
that the twins , , aged Jive , began to
evince signs of indulging their favorite
amusement of weeping in one another's
arms. All the family excepting
Charles Simon , the eldest son , who
Lad just returned from college , became
vere grave.
"I have been expecting a visit from
burglars for many years , " said Mr.
Cobblcsbury. "It is fetrange we have
escaped so long. "
' True , ' ' asserted Charles Simon.
"Every well regulated family nowa
days must boast of a visit from burg
lars before they can take their proper
pcsit'on in society. I learned that in
college. "
I Marmadukc thought it would be a
good idea to set steel traps in all
-parts of the house to catch the burw-
t °
Jars.
Jars."What
"What dQ the newspapers say ? "
.asked Miss Emelinc.
Mr. Cobblesbury could not remem-
bcr having read any good recipe for
-catching burglars. Charles Simon
thought he Avould write a book on
the subject as soon : is he graduated
nt college. But the principal trouble
seemed to be how the family were to
be awakened when the burglars
came.
came.The
The burglars will wake us fast
enough , " said Charles Simon.
"But they might kill us first , " said
Mr.Cobblesbury , innocently.
"I read in a paper that the safest
way was to fasten a burglar alarm to
every door and window in the house , "
said Miss Emeline.
"That would be a waste of money , "
objected Mr. Cobblesbury , "for no
burglar would break in at every door
and window. "
"Besides. " said Mrs. Cobblcsbury ,
convincingly , "the burglars would
steal the alarms. "
"Why can't we put tar all over the
front stairs ? " inquired Marmaduke.
"Then pa and I could kill them in the
morning as we go down to breakfast ,
for all the burglars would get stuck
on the way up ! " '
'I do not wish to kill any depredator ,
3f he will surrender or leave peace
ably , " said Mr. Cobblesbury. "The
-only arrangement possible is to arm
ourselves to the teeth , and I will con-
ceal the money in a safe place. "
The family coincided with this. Mrs.
Cobblesbury thought they should re
tire early in order to obtain some sleep
before the burglars came. There was
Eome difficulty concerning the arma
ment required. Both Mr. Cobblesbury
and Charles Simon possessed revolvers.
Marrnaduke took the fire tongs and an
old razor and tied a leather belt around
his waist Miss Emeline procured a
small package of red pepper to throw
into the burglars' eyes , but Mrs. Cob
blesbury thought this would be cruel
and her daughter compromised on
black pepper , which would not be so
strong. The twins wished to take the
garden hose to bed with them , feeling
confident that an icy stream of water
would drive the intruders away. They
were eventuallv obliged to be content
ed , however , with their popguns and a
small tin pail filled with beans.
When Mr. and Mrs. Cobblesbury
retired the question arose what should
be done with the revolver ? Mrs. Cob-
Mesburv declared she should die of
fright if the weapon were placed under
" " theVillow , and Mr. Cobblesbury finally
< 1rew up a chair beside the bed and laid
th < * revolver upon it.
"Shall we leave the gas burning1
inquired Mrs. Cobblesbury , nervously.
Certainly not , " answered her hus-
1iind. : "The burglars would then be
. ; -enabled to move around with perfect
case. " Accordingly they turned of
the gas and retired. Mr. Cobblesbury
despite his years , was soon snorinj
vigorously , but Mrs. Cobblesbury coul <
not sleep. In about an hour she shoo !
her liege lord energetically , and ad
jured him to wake up.
"Yes , my love ! " cried be , leaping
up ; give me the gun ; I'll fix 'em ! "
"JNo , no , " said Mrs. Cobblesbury
"It isn't burglars it's the pistol. "
"What's the matter with the pis
tol ? " queried the husband , sarcastic
ally. "Is the pistol sick ? "
"I can't remember the way you laii
it , Samuel , " explained Mrs. Cobbles
bury , tremulously. "Didn't you pul
it with the pointer part toward the
bed ! "
"Well , suppose I did ? "
"Oh , Samuel , V cried Mrs. Cobbles
bury , "turn it around quick : it may go
off at any minute and blow us all t <
pieces ! "
Mr. Cobblesbury reached out sleepilj
and turned the revolver around. . II
was now aimed directly toward her ,
but , fortunately , Mrs. Cobblesbury
lacked the power of seeing in the dark
ness , and was comforted.
Several hours later , Mr. Cobbles'
bury awoke from a thrilling dream ir
which he had killed seven burglars sin
gle-handed and was wading about ir
human gore. He awoke with a vio
lent start and for a moment was hardlj
able to decide whether he was still
dreaming or not Just as he arrived
at the satisfactory conclusion that he
was thoroughly awake , a tremendous
crash down stairs came to his ears.
Rising in a high state of excitement
Mr. Cobblesbury grasped the barrel oi
his revolver and felt his way cautiously
along to the door , his heart beating in a
most reprehensible manner. Unfortu
nately , as he gained the doorway , he
stumbled over some object and struck
the floor with a shock like an amateur
earthquake. Mrs. Cobblesbury had
thoughtfully placed a chair against the
door to impede the progress of the noc-
tnrnal prowlers. The noise awakened
her , and he could hear her muflled
voice , from beneath the sheets , shriek
ing : "Samuel ! Samuel ! the _ burglara
are here ! "
"So am I , " grunted Mr. Cobbles-
bury , rubbing his injured foot , absent-
mindedly , with the butt of his revol
ver , on which he had maintained a des
perate hold.
"Have you caught them ? " cries Mrs.
Cobblesbury. "Is it safe for me to get
up ? "
"Stay where you are , and don't
move , " said Mr. Cobblesbury , as he
limped into the hall , sliiveuiug with
cold and excitement. He was not
afraid , but nevertheless began to feel
a willingness to let the burglars depart
peaceably , so he straightened up by
the stairway , and yelled at the top of
his voice :
"I'll give you two minutes to leave
the house ! We are all armed to the
teeth ! Turn the night latch and run
out of the front door if you value your
lives ! "
Mr. Cobblesbury could not help con
gratulating himself afterward when he
remembered having made this speech.
There was no answer but a flash of
light in the hall attracted his attention ,
and Charles Simon , Marmaduke , and
Miss Emeline , all half dressed , appear
ed on the scene.
"Where are they ? " cried Charles
Simon and Marmaduke in a breath , one
brandishing a revolver and the other a
razor. *
"Down stairs ; " said Mr. Cobblesbury
in a theatrical whisper.
"Emeline , this is no place for you , "
said Charles Simon , taking the light
from her hand. "You know I have
learned everything at college , and I
know all about such things. Now , you
just go and get under the bed in moth
er's room , and don't let the twins make
a single peep till I call you. "
"But the burglars may come in and
chloroform us , " objected Miss Emeline.
"I have read of such things in the
newspapers. "
"Hush ! " ' said Mr. Cobblesbury.
"You all talk too loud. "
Miss Emeline vanished and was heard
barricading the door. Mr. Cobblesbury
then said that Marmaduke must go for
a policeman.
Marmaduke objected decidedly and
begged to be allowed to live a little
longer.
"I will go , " said Charles Simon.
But it would never do to go down
stairs among the burglars , and Mr.
Cobblesbury looked perplexed.
" 1 will swing nn-self out of the win
"
dow to the lower "roof , crawl along to
the kitchen , and climb down the grape
arbor , " said Charles Simon. "I
learned that at college. "
Accordingly Mr. Cobblesbury and
Marmaduke lowered Charles Simon
from the opened window to the roof be
low ; and he agreed to give three
whistles when he returned with the
police.
Mr. Cobblesbury then sat down on
the top stair with his revolver pointed
below , and Marmaduke crouched be
side him with the lamp. It was very
chilly on the top stair.
"Say , Em , " shouted Marmaduke at
length , "give us a blanket ; vre're
fretein' ! "
Several repetitions of this resulted in
the door being opened a few inches and
the required blanket was slipped out.
Mr. Cobblesbury and Marmaduke ac
cordingly wrapped themselves up in
aboriginal fashion and waited.
"I declare , " said Mr. Cobblesbury ,
"if Charles Simon doesn't return be
fore long I shall go back to bed again. "
At this moment a tremendous racket
occurred outside , which culminated in
a violent ringing of the door bell and
loud cries in Charles Simon's voice.
"I tell you I ain't a burglar , " shout
ed Charles Simon without "You let
me be ! Pa , open the door ! "
They are murdering Charles , "
shrieked Mrs. Cobblesbury from the
inner room , and Mr. Cobblesbury ,
dragging the half frozen , badly fright
ened Marmaduke after him , ran down
stairs and unlocked the door.
"I am coming , my son ! " yelled Mr.
Cobblesbury. "Hold 'em off a minute
longer ! "
When the door was opened , however ,
the three policemen who had Charles
Simon in custody had realized that he
was not a burgfar and released him.
As soon as they understood the state of
affairs they accompanied Mr. Cobbles-
/ * * . *
bury , Charles Simon and Marmaduki
through the house on a tour of inspec
tion with a dark lantern. At the din
ing room door they halted. A noisi
was plainly heard within. "We havi
them , " said one of the policemen , anc
he shut the door in a. great hurry. H <
then gave an order to the other twc
policemen , and then all three drev
their revolvers and fired through thi
narrow opening of the door , which wa :
instantly closed again. "We will nov
go in and capture them , " said the heai
policeman , but nobody seemed to can
about going in. One of the policemer
paid that the robbers were killed , o :
course , and it was useless to disturl
/he bodies before the cornoner coulc
be summoned.
Mr. Cobblesbury did not think the
burglars were all killed , as only three
shots had b.een fired. If there had nol
been a large gang of them they woulc
not have dared remain boldly in tht
house all this time.
It was finally decided that all should
rush in at once. The door was opened ,
the three policemen , Mr. Cobblesbury ,
Charles Simon and Marmaduke cnterec
in triumph , while precisely at the same
moment an immense black cat leaped
from the table and flew out of the room
like a streak of lightning.
There were no burglars , but some ol
the dishes on the table had been shot
into small fragments. The policemen
were very angry , and debated whether
it would not be wise to arrest Mr.
Cobblesbury. Finally they marched
off in high dudgeon , just as Mrs. Cob
blesbury , Miss Emeline and the twins
entered.
"Where are the burglars ? " cried
Miss Emeline.
Nobody answered.
"But the money is safe , " said Mrs.
Cobblesbury. Everybody looked sur
prised. They had forgotten all about
the money.
"The burglars escaped , " said Mr.
Cobblesbury , "just as I was prepar
ing to use my trusty revolver. The
police spoiled it all. " As Mr. Cobbles-
bury uttered these words lie flourished
his weapon , and Marmaduke made a
discovery. "Why , pa , " said he "there
ain't nothin' in tbat pistol , and the
trigger's broke oft' , too ! "
Mr. Cobblesbury said never a word ,
but wrapjjgd his blanket around him
like an Indian chieftain , and stalked
upstairs with a dignity that caused the
family to gaze-after him with feelings
of speechless admiration. Herbert If.
Window , in Chicago Mail.
letter-Carriers to Have a Best
"In 19SG such a thing as a postman or
a carrier walking ten or fifteen hours a
day delivering mail matter will never
be heard of , for the simple reason that
there will be none in existence then , "
remarked a scientific man the other day
to a New York Mail and Express re
porter.
"How will the mail be delivered ? "
"Everything will be reduced to a fine
system , and a letter will be delivered
in three seconds after its arrival in the
postoflice. Each house in a big city
will be connected with the general
postoflice or branch station , as the case
may be , with a pneumatic tube large
enough to carry a goodsized package.
At present such a system of delivery
cannot be put into practice because it
would be too expensive. A century
hence civilzation will rise to such a
high and prosperous point that a system
of quick delivery by means of pneuma
tic tubes will entirely be in vogue. It
could be done now only it would bank
rupt a city. The tube from Twenty-
third street to the Western Union
building shows how nicely it works. A
letter or telegraphic message takes just
two seconds to go the two and a half
miles. The quickest means of transit
arc sure to be adopted in the long run.
It is the evolution of progress , and
nothing can stop it short of the uni
verse. Not only will private houses
have these tubes , but nil our large
cities will be pneumatically connected.
Chicago will be perhaps.ten seconds by
letter from New York and San Fran
cisco a minute or so. It will change a
great many things and do away with
the steam-cars as a mail carrier. The
system is yet in its infancy.
"New York will by that time have a
new system of sewers , much better
than Paris has now. and tubes can be
run along in them instead of having to
dig up the earth , as is the case witb
gas and steam pipes at present. The
postage on letters will not be one-
twentieth what it is now , and the ex
pense to the government will be less.
Of course the deliveries will have to be
regulated to so many during the day.
Say five or ten during the morning
and that number during the afternoon
and evening. And yet human nature
is so constructed that even with such
improved , facilities I believe many
kickers could be found who would pro
test against the slow time made. All
these tilings will come to pass , and it
takes no prophet to plainly see the
handwriting on the wall. The over
worked carriers will have a long rest"
Canada Won't Stand It.
Uncle Sam "I demand that you
recognize the rights of American fish
ermen. "
Miss Canada "Demand away. It
don't worry me any. "
Uncle Sam "Now see here Miss
Canada , I just want to ask you one
question. Why won't you let us have
any more of your herring ? "
Miss Canada "Because you put them
in boxes and sell them to us as sardines ,
that's why. " Omaha World.
DiFranklin's Gallantry.
Dr. Franklin was one of the most
gallant of men , even after he was well
advanced in years. I remember to
have seen in the Government Library
at Paris the original , in bad French , of
a note written by him to Mmc. Ilelve-
tius , wife of the illustrious philosopher.
"Mr. Franklin never forgets any party
where Mme. Helvctius is to be. He
even believes that if he were engaged
to go to paradise this morning he would
make application to be permitted to re
main on earth till 1:80 o'clock to re
ceive the embrace which she has been
pleased to premise himupon meeting
at the house of Mr. Turgot" Ben.
I'erley JFoore , in Boston Budget.
LAFAGAN'S LOGIC.
There is one chance for a loafer
is generally his worst vice.
There is a great deal of wisdom i
humor , but not much humor in wisdom
It is not our theories alone , but thos
put into practice , that make us wha
we are at last.
When the world abuses you a shoi
memory is , next to sound teeth , th
most to be envied.
After all there are but few men wh
can go into the loafing business an
make n success of it
The best education that man receive
in this world is from other men. N
man can learn well from himself alone
It isn't because good advice is wanl
ing that many people "go wrong , " bu
because it is easier to "let'er slide'
than to take the medicine.
Satan may secure a scalp now am
then , yet can never get a great deal o
respect This would seem to me to b
mighty humiliating.
Curiosity is humanity's best grip
People full of this gift often knov
more about things in general thai
those who are not , and I've no doub
many of them have discovered sorni
things they wish they hadn't.
I have always held that if a man wa
foreordained for the business , and wa
given a fair show , he would verify th <
theory of what is born in the blooc
will come out in the flesh , and I'n
holding it yet
Hope is a prime virtue , yet you can
not get fat on it no more than you car
on soft soap. Buta reasonable amoun
of hope and a considerable amount o
"dusting around" has "bulled the mar
ket" betore now.
Even if a man has to act like a fool ir
order to round up the measure of hi ;
happiness , it is even then a good in
vestment. One happy man in a neigh
borhood is conducive of more happi
ness than a case of twins.
I am not positive that my wife woult
object to my marrying again and start
ing a Mormon ranch , but I have a sus
picion that she would. However , I do
know that I would feel like death am
probably act worse if I should ever live
to see tho head of any other family
hold my Anna on his knee and talk
about the Mormon church , the glorj
there was in the business , and play the
old bell-wether sheep generally. Total
depravity is bad enough in itself , bul
when men seek to find a condition
where loss of modesty and virtue arc
permitted to exist tinder the guise of a
lunatic religion , then I believe it is
about time for decency to blow out the
light and go to bed. < ucctgo Ledger.
BREVITIES.
It is the early bird that catches , the
train.
A jackass on a country lawn is very
suggestive.
Time and the train go together get
there or get left
If you want to beat the circus , get a
boy or girl preacher.
Lady a woman who can talk the
slang of the race-track.
Beware of choosing for a friend him
of an austere countenance.
No babe ever pulled the whiskers oi
the father of his country.
"Walk as if your body had a man in
it" Live as if it had a soul in it.
Beware of the young man who car
ries his saloon manners into his home.
Mrs. Cleveland plays the piano.
Who says this is not a Nation with a
bigN ?
Cloth shoos shaking the dress at
anything to scare it say hens or mad
dogs.
The nightmare produced by a railroad
restaurant pie is none of the Shetland
pony sort.
What church attachment does John
L. Sullivan remind you of ? The pound
party yes. Chicago Ledger.
The Iowa Beer Business.
"Our brewei'S are selling consider
ably less liquor to saloons , " but they
are just about making it up among
private consumers. A man who makes
the rounds of the city frequently in an
official-capacity stated to me yesterday
that he had been offered beer at ten or
eleven houses on the route that morn
ing , most of them places at which beer
was not kept a few months ago. I
have seen frequent excursions to the
country this summer , i load of men ,
sometimes hard women with them , and
a keg or so of beer. They go to some
leafy deli and drink all. Furthermore ,
I heard a man ask one of our brewers
last Saturday to send a lour gallon keg
of beer to his house for Sunday. The
brewer said he couldn't do it ; that he
had already orders in for 248 suchkej s
and could hardly supply them. He
could accommodate the man with a six
gallon keg , but not with a smaller one.
I think the private consumption of li
quor is largely increased since the sa
loons have been closed , as they have ,
but what the moral effect of that will
be I don't know or pretend to say. I
am waiting for further development
before making up my mind. " Burling
ton Hawkeye.
A Great Invention.
In the latest prospectus the editor of
the Arizona Howler says : "Now is the
time to subscribe. We have invented
a very useful machine , which we will
send to every one who subscribes for
the Howler for five years. The ma
chine in ques tion can be placed in the
bottom of a hen's nest , and when biddy
lays an egg it gently seizes it ( the egg )
and by an ingenious device stamps
upon it the day of the month on which
it was laid. Then a little spring flies
out and throws the hen off the nest be
fore she can say Jack Robison. after
which a bell rings to notify y. u that
an egg has been laid. When these ma
chines are in general use it will be no
longer possible to put back number
eggs on the market Walk up to our
sanctum , gents , and when you lay
down the dust for live years you can
take home one of those "wonderful ma
chines.
COSTOF UNIVERSITYTRAINING
Comparison Ketweon English ani
German Universities.
The Edinburgh Review makes an in
teresting comparison between the re
lative cost in Germany and in Englam
of a university career , and some ae
count of the parentage of the students
Germany is , of course , very unlit
England. It will be some time bcfor
professors are as honored here as there
There is something to us inadequate ii
a life spent in passing the dust of son *
obscure corner of science or histor
through sieve after sieve. Our younj
men of promise prefer the keen rivalr
of the learned professions or thi
chances of literature or journalism , o
else they go to the colonies to try theii
luck , or to India as civil servants. Bui
making every allowance , if thero i ;
anything in numbers , wo are more be
hind Germany than we should be , con
sidering our wealth and the extent o :
our endowments. The population o ]
Germany is about 45,000,000 , that o
Great Britain and Ireland about 35-
000,000. Germany has twenty-one
universities , the United Kingdom thir
teen , or , if University and King's col
leges and the new colleges in province *
and Ireland "of university rank" art
included , about the same number as
Germany. But there is a want of sys
tem in our distribution , and the number
of students is less in proportion. In
Germany a university is as much a mat
ter of course in a large city as a town
hall in England. In Germany , again ,
there are probably 25,000 , in England ,
Scotland , and Ireland there can scarce
ly be more than 10,000 students. And
Scotland , for whatever reason , is the
only part of the United Kingdom in
which the love of learning has pene
trated to the lower middle class as in
Germany. Here , for instance , is Dr.
Conrad's classification of the "occupa
tions and social position of the fathers
o the German students" at Halle : " 1 ,
professions ; 2 , lower officers and ele-
mcntry schoolmasters ; 3. merchants ,
manufacturers , hotel-keepers , landed
proprietors , oJiicors , apothecaries ,
fundholdure ; 4 , artisans and peasants ;
5 , inferior servants and laborers. "
The number of "inferior servants and
laborers" is small , smaller probably
than in Scotland , bat that of the arti
sans and peasants is a very considera
ble indeed : and we should like to know
how many elementary schoolmasters
or apothecaries there are in London
who have sons at University or King's
college. University education , too , in
Gcruiunv is incomparably cheaper
than in England.
Have Their Own Private Glasses.
"Heah , bahkccper. this is not my
glass , " said an eighteen carat dudo iu
a fashionable Broadway restaurant yes
terday afternoon , petulantly pushing
back the diluted julep before him and
stroking his little moustache with an
aggrieved look.
"Beg pardon , sir , beg pardon , " said
the barkeeper , a5 he hastily withdrew
the offending glass. Opening a little
cabinet in the sideboard he brought out
a pretty cut glass goblot , in which he
carefully mixed the dude's "pizen , "
saying apologetically as lie pushed it
across the marble , "So many people
coming in here I clean forgot it. "
The dude felt too much hurt to reply ,
but sipped his beverage and then faded ,
away.
That's the last fool notion of them
ducks , " said the drink dispenser , with
a backward jerk of the thumb toward
the retreating voung man.
"What's that ? ' '
"Why. each one of them has to have
his own glass now. You see this case ?
Well. I've got eighteen sets of private
glasses in there , l'--e different kinds of
glasses in a set , and when one of them
comes in I've got to get his own little
cup to mix the liquor in. They are
good trade , though , and I can't afford
to object"
The glasses were very pretty , of fine
cut ware , and shaped like those used
for ordinary , every day customers. The
sets , the barkeeper said , cost $5. and
can be purchased at only one or two
places in the city.
"They pretend , " continued the man
of mixed drinks , "that they're afraid of
drinking out of the same glasses as the
mob , as they might get some disease.
They've been going in about two
months now and they'll go clear across
the city without a drink before they'll
take a drop out of anvthing but their
own glasses. Spotting World.
Alcohol in Everything.
The amount of alcohol present varies
greatly in the several liquors in which
it forms tho intoxicating ingredient ,
rum containing about 75 per cent
Whisky and brandy average about 50 ;
port , 20 ; sherry. 15 to 24.
Maderia. 19 : claret 10 ; champagne ,
14 ; cider , 6 ; ales and porter from ( i to
12.
12.All
All fermented drinks contain alcohol ,
ginger beer , etc. . usually containing
from 1 to 3 per cent of it
Total abstinence from alcohol would
seem almost an impossibility , for even
milk contains small quantise * of it
In bread-making alcohoi produced
in considerable quantities bthe action
of the yeast upon the sugar in the
flour ; the aggregate amount of spirit
thus produced in London being some
three hundred thousand gallons an
nually.
Some chemists go the length of
asserting that evenValer itself is not
entirely free from it.
News.
Who iTade Congressmen ?
Once upon a time a good man took
his little boy to the gallery of the House
to show him the great men of the Na
tion , and thoy listened eagerly to an
able effort by one of them. When he
had finished the father turned to the
boy and put his hand on his head.
"My son , " he said , "an honest man
is the noblest work of God. "
The boy looked at his father's face
with his great earnest eyes.
"Pap : , f > he inquired simply , "who
made Congressmen ? ' ' Washington
Critic.
A GYPSY BEAUTY.
One of tho Oldest nnd 'Most Famous
of tho Romanies.
Fifty or sixy years ago the gypsies
in England were a much more remark
able race than they are at present. < * :
The railway had not como to break up
their habits ; there were hundreds of
lonely places in dell and dingle where
thoy could hatch the tan , or pitch tho
tent , their blood had been little mixed ft
with that of tho gorgio , or gentile ; they '
spoke their language with greater
purity than at prejsent , and still kept
their old characteristics unchanged. If
they had the faults of Arabs they also
had many of their good qualities. If
thoy stole horses and foraged on farm
ers , if their women told fortunes , lied
and sometimes cheated a man out of
all his ready money , by pretending to
find a treasure in his cellar , on tho
other hand , they were extremely grate
ful and honest to those who befriended
them , and manifested in many ways a
rough manliness which partially re
deemed their petty vices. They were
all , as are many of their sons at present ,
indomitabe rough riders , of the horso
horsey , and to a man boxers , so that
many of them were distinguished in tho
' - ; the last of these being Jem
K'ize-ring
ace. At this time there prevailed
among the English .Romany a strong ,
mutual faith , a tribal honesty which was
limited , but all the stronger for that ,
even as the arms of a man grow strong
er when he loses the use of his legs.
They are a people of powerful frames ,
passions , and traditional principles.
Their weak children soon died from tho
hardships of nomadic life , the remain
der illustrated selection by suffering , and
the survival of the littcst to fight.
With such characteristics there could
not fail among the gypsies many strik
ing instances of warm friendship , in
tense love , and tho fidelity which
endures even till death. This was
known of them when little else was
known beyond thirr most apparent and
repulsive traits. Walter Scott indulg
ed in no romantic license when he de
picted ilaxraddin Matigrabin as devoted
to Qucntm Durv.ard ; eVi-n at present
the incident of a thoughtful gift or any
little act of kindness to them will be
remumbfrrd with a gratitude out of
all proportion to its value , ami jjo the
roundof all tho ilomanym the United
States. And therefore when men fell
iu love with women there often result
ed those instances of intense passion
an < ! steady faith which at the present
day are really becoming mythical. The
gpsy iu this , as in everything else has
bcen'a continuation of the middle ages ,
or of the romance era.
Such a passion was inspired ruoro
than hair a century ago by Jack Coop
er , the Kuruniengro Koiu , or Fighting
Gypsy , in it girl of his own tribe. Her
name was Charlotte Lee , and it was
about ISoO that Leslie , the royal
academician , led by the fame of her
beauty , painted the picture now in New
York iu the possession of his sister ,
Miss Emma Leslie. The fame of her
charms still survives among her peo
ple , and when : i few days ago as I was
talking of Charlotte to some gypsies of
her kin near Philadelphia , I was asked
if I meant the Kinkeni that is , tho
Beautiful One. Century.
llovf to Travel With Comfort.
Avoid railroad food by carrying
chicken , beef , hard-boiled eggs , bread ,
fruit and salt
Arrange to start quietly after a plen
tiful meal. Take overshoes and water
proof in your hand-bag. This is im
portant
In railway traveling ride only in the
last car of an express train and the
front car of a slow train , or get as
near these points : us poosible.
Attend to the daily functions , else
travel will derange them. On warm
days ride backward by an open win
dow , thus avoiding cinders and
draughts.
For oceantrips take abundance of
outer garments and flannel bed gowns.
Walk the deck for exercise , else first
days ashore will be fatiguing. But rest
the first two days at sea.
At night if fatigued , drink a cup of
tea with a bit of bread , and rest thirty
minutes before dining. A tired
stomach cannot digest easily. Hence
the frequency of diarrhoea during
travel.
If seasick , keop the deck , lie upon tho
back near the center of the ship ; eat
in spite of nausea. If vomiting fol
lows , eat again at once. This is the
only remedy.
Drink little or none of the railroad
ice-water. If obliged to eat at sta-
t.ons , choose simple food. Eat slowly.
Better less food than much haste.
Bread and fruit or chocolate make an
excellent lunch.
Drink hot beef tea with plenty of
red pepper. Eat ship crackers , raw
beef , finely chopped , salted and red
peppered , and mix with bread crumbs.
If not seasick , control the appetite or
prepare for dyspepsia.
Avoid nearness to water-closets. Bo
sure of dry bed linen and clean blank
ets. It is belter to use your shawls
than to be exposed to dampness.
Throw back the bedclothing two hours
before retiring. See that your gas-
burner does not leak. Move bedsteads
away from windows. Old hotels are
draughty. JYeu > York Graphic.
Giving the Other Woman a Show.
An old shanty boat with a tin stern-
wheel and a general air of having been
a tender to Noah's ark has been at the
mouth of Jack's run , near Bellevue ,
since the spring. John Whitfield , his
wife , and another woman lived on the
boat The ark is gone now , and tho
happy family is no longer happy.
On Saturday Whitfield sent "his wife
to town to collect an alleged debt , and
in her absence he and the female took
the train for Wheeling. Mrs. Whitfield
was broken-hearted at first when she
found that her faithless lord had flown.
The neighbors comforted her. however ,
and List evening she sard : Well. I've
supported John by sewing for Sen
years , and I guess 1'li give the other
woman : * . show now. " Pilizliunk Uis-