The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, September 10, 1885, Image 6

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    JENNIE JUNE IN EUROPE.
,25 -
Genevieve 'Ward's Home and Her
Mother's Early Recollections ,
of .New
; * Ceneilcvo on a Tonr Around tho World
1 -Jreparatory to Leaving tbe fctaso
*
' and Becoming : a Sculptress.
Tho Botanic and Ottjer Fetes Minister Phelps
?
and Wife A Call on03car % Wilde
; - and His Eccentric Mother.
No. 10 CAVENDISH ROAD , REGENT'S
PAKK , LONDON , July 22. London is a
marvel ; it is the many-sided represen
tative of all cities , of all nations , of all
peoples , of all arts , and all industries ,
simple and almost-rustic in some of its
ways , majectic in its achievements ,
grand and munificent in its charities
and its hospitalities. In comparison
with its methods , its vastness , its pop
ulation , its area , its immense diversities
of interests , Now York seems like a
village of one or two streets. From
the Isle of Wight we reach the metrop
olis by the Northwestern Railway in
W f three hours and a half , one hour of
P . which is consumed by boat to South-
* " ' ampton. We are a party of three ,
with three trunks and any quantity of
smaller impediments. It is a problem
how to reach our destination north of
Regent's Park and take our luggage
along , for wo are booked for a concert
and cricket match immediately upon
our arrival. The station asent ad
vises a private "bus , " which takes our
party and its belongings the three
miles for four shillings , trunks inclu
ded , with sixpence extra for the
driver and a shilling extra for
handling.
Our stopping place is a charming
home outside the noise and bustlo of
JLondon , but within fifteen minutes of
Oxford and Regent Circus by bus and
close by Regent's Park upon a "road"
lined with trees , where tho houses
have walled gardens front and back ,
and the birds sing in the trees all the
day Jong. The neighborhood is a
favorite one with artists and pro
fessional people , for it is quiet yet
easily accessible , and the drives in ev
ery direction are through the finest
neighborhood by Regent's Park to the
business part of the city , and through
Hyde Park to South Kensington and
its Museum. South Kensington is
more modern and.professionally fash
ionable , but it is also much more
crowded and said to be less healthy.
Among the artists , dramatic and oth
er , whose homes are in this neighbor
hood is Miss Genevieve Ward , who is
now in Australia on a tour around the
world , signalized by many curious
adventures. Miss "Ward's mother ,
who was a daughter of Gilbert Leigh ,
one of the early Mayors of New York ,
and her brothelr Albert , who was at
tached to the American Legation in
Pans during the Franco-Prussian war ,
constituted the residential family and
relate with infinite gusto the offer of a
Maori chief in New Zealand to Miss
Ward to put away all his wives if she
would consent to take their place.
Mrs. Lucie Leigh Ward is a very .re
markable woman , and it-is from her
that Miss Ward derives her remarka
ble gifts. She was seventy-six the 22d
of last JJay ; yet she was the feature of
.a brilliant "at home" the other after
noon , when she recited at Dr. Langdon
Downes , with infinite expression
Thackerey's "Canebottomed Chair. "
Her voice is of extraordinary compass ,
and when she was a younger woman
was really three distinct voices
soprano , tenor and bass its depth it
still retains , but the higher notes have
lost their clearness and purity , though
it is still capable of wide variations
which are very effective in recitations ,
in which , however , of Lite she seldom
indulges. " She paints also so well that
had she devoted herself to that art as
u profession she must have become
eminent in it. Her pictures , with
which the walls of her drawing room
arc filled , lack the technique which is
the result of training , but they are ex-
cellent in color and feeling. "Her son
has a collection of upwards of thirty
miniatures painted by his mother " and
which he calls his "treasures , " and
which are most interesting and valua
ble as studies. Mrs. Ward's memory
dates back to the time when a sti'oam
ran through Canal street in New York ,
and Eighth street was a sandy lane
leading to rich green fields , and a hill
upon which the elegant out of-town
residences were built her father's
among the number. Mr. Leigh built
and occupied the first marble house in
New York , at 15 Broad war , and im
ported for it the first marble bath
ever brought to the voung city from
Italy.
ACPJ3
Q NCYl V W/lKPf
The home of Miss Genevieve Ward
is a three-story house of stone , with
bay windows opening respectively
upon the drawing room , the library
and Miss Ward's own rooms , consist
ing of a suit of three upon the third
floor , with attics above , which do not
show from the front ol the house. The
dining room is upon the ground floor
and opens upon a walled garden cov
ered with ivy and climbing roses , with
a balcony between it and the wide
French windows of the room and lined
with creepers , so luxuriant in foliage
as to give the effect of a conservatory ,
and to every meal the al fresco char
acter in which Londoners seem to de
light as much as their continental
neighbors. A door set deep in massive
stone admits to "Corda Lodge , " and
if the visitor has a horse and carriage
it is hospitably entertained in the sta
ble , the iron door of which is visible at
the left of the picture. The house is
rented upon one of the ninety-nine
year leases common in London , by
virtue of which the tenant is practi-
callv the owner , paying the taxes , be
ing responsible for repairs and for the
good sanitarv condition of the prem-
ises , the original proprietor siruyjy re
ceiving his rental without further re
sponsibility : Americans in London
have manv pleasant associations con
nected with Miss Ward's hospitable
house and her mother's weekly ro-
unions , and lament the probability of
a breaking up of a bright internation
al circle , for the English climate is
hard upon maladies contracted by Mr.
"
Albert Ward , from exposure"and
actual want of proper food while a
member of the United States .Legation
in Paris during tho Franco-Prussian
war ; and as Miss Ward possesses equal
talent m sculpture as in dramatic art
her tour around the world is an actual
and positive farewell of the stage , and
its completion in New York next
March will bo. the signal for retirement
from the stage , the adoption of tho
Riviera as a home and sculpture as a
pastime , if not a profession. Natur
ally , her first appearances wjll be made
in "London , Paris , or Manchester ,
where her first triumphs were achieved.
But she has refused a new and power
ful play , "Bosadicea , " written ex
pressly for her , in anticipation of re
tirement , not "hankering , " as she
says , after public applause , but loving
"outdoor" life , and determined to find
a home where her mother , her devoted
brother and herself can enjoy sunny
days all the year round.
About the "suburbs of London there
are many beautiful , homelike cottages , "
surrounded with gardens , and covered
with vines and flowers , roses , creep
ers , &c. , presenting a very homelike
and cheerful aspect. The homes of
England are noted the world over.
Below is presented a picture-of one of
these vine-clad dwellings.
fl
We think we do things on a large
scale in ] New York , but they are very ,
trivial compared with tho magnitude
of London enterprises. At Lord's all
the worms will seem to have turned
out to a cricket match ten thousand.
people and from twenty to thirty
drags on the ground at one time , and'
all in tho gayest of toilets , and the
liveliest of holiday humor. On the
same day the trains will be crowded
with their thousands bound to sec a
regatta , and in tho evening one will
sit in a carriage- hour in line to
obtain entrance to the Botanic Fete of-
tho Royal Society at Regent's Park.
And what a sight it is ! Fifteen thou
sand people , the ladies in evening
dress , embroidered satin and tulle ,
with wraps of cream or ruby plush on
Indian chuddah cloth , lined'wlth gold
satin , falling from their shoulders ,
promenading the illuminated grounds
inade lighter than day with thousand
upon thousands of colored electric
.ights and in different parts of the in-
closure conservatories of orchids , con
servatories of palms , conservatories of
roses , with music in each one , but so
distant that the different strains and
) ands do not in the least interfere one
with another. Superior even to this.
n magnitude was the "conversazione"-
; iven by the School of Arts of Ken- .
-
' * - " ' " " *
'Jr -j / T/j "
_ _ _
COtlK A
sington Museum in connection with
the Inventions Exhibition. Eleven
different orchestras performed in the
courts , galleries , conservatories and
kiosks , one interfering in nowise with
the other , and each one representing
a different nationality or some special
qualities of it. There was the full
band of the Coldstream Guards , of the
Pomeranian Hussars , the Strauss Or
chestra conducted by Horr Strauss ,
the Court Band of the King of Siam ,
and in the Musee Room later on brill
iant organ , pianoforte and vocal re
citals. In the grounds the fountains
were illuminated and all the trees to
the very top of the tallest
The Royal Albert Hall was encir
cled by row upon row of electric
lights , and waters trickled and dash
ed from the rockeries in changing
hues of violet and gold. At eight dif
ferent points refreshments were serv
ed without stint and without charge ,
consisting of strawberries , ices , coffee ,
' and lemon
cake.'biscuits , claret-cup
ade , to the 15,000 or 20,000 people
estimated to have been assembled
within the grounds , which , however ,
were never crowed in any one spot , so
great is their extent and so manifold
and nearly equal were tho attractions.
The most fascinating thing in the
tvbole Exhibition of Inventions , which
of course consists largely of electrical
apparatusjind machinery , is the won
derful old London street built in for
jhe Fisheries Exhibition last 3'ear , and
in the shops of which the workmen
are all engaged at their handicrafts in
Ihe sixteenth and seventeenth centu
ry costumes. In one old shop a de-
ifghtful old man in jerkin and broad
leather belt , linen collar andllem-
brandt cap , is engaged in making
atchings ot Old London , which a love
ly Puritan maiden in gray gown and
jnowy muslin cap and kerchief sells.
The Fourth of July we spent in a
iruly patriotic manner. The wido
svindow of the breakfast room opening
apon a garden was draped with a
large American Hag , which was sa
luted with all thehonors. . After
breakfast we went in a party of live to
pay our respects to the new Minister
ind his wife , Mr. and Mrs. Phelps ,
Lownde's Square , where they have
taken the house , vacated by Mr. Low-
ill. It is very pleasantly and central
ly situated , and Mr. and Mrs. Phelps
tvon golden opinions for their charm
jf manner , their perfect simplicity ,
pet thorough courtesy and altogether
lelightf til * hospitality. They were as
sisted in receiving by Mr. Henry
SVhite , whose previous experience
renders him a valuable coadjutor in
; he trials and anxieties attendant on
peing projected into the midst of a
fashionable London season , with ex-
jiting duties to perform and no op
portunity for preparation. The
United States fails to realize what is
lue to itself and its position among
aations , abroad as well as at home.
Its petty economies in the midst of
ts aggregated wealth lead to whole- ,
tale robbery , and its meanness in not
providing suitable permanent quar-
iers for its principal representative in-
jreat and enpensive European cities , "
renders it either dependent upon pri-
rate fortunes or subject to all the hu-
uiliatiou of inadequate resources.
From the Embassy we drove to
Maylield" ( Putney ) , the beautiful
ionic of Mr. and Mrs. Pfeiffer , both
veil known as authors , and who will
) e remembered by many Americans
is among the most cultivated and de-
ightful of English visitors to Ameri-
: an shores. Mrs. Pfeiffer is a tall ,
jraceful lady , picturesque in appear-
race , and exactly suited to'be the pre
siding genius of a home like "May-
ield. " It was a "reception" to which ,
ve were bidden not a garden party
> roper , but visitors were conducted
hrough the vestibule and principal
ooms to the terrace at the back of the
jabled stone dwelling , where at the
oofc of the steps they were received by !
he mistress of the mansion in a white
imbroidered Greek costume of her
> wn desi < rniug , and taken down a cir-
uilar walk skirting the lawn , walled
m one side by ivy at least twelve feet
ligh and having in its centre a natural ;
trbor , or outdoor sitting room , formed
) y the'arching growth of three mag-
lificent aspens. Stretching across
xorn this arbor to the opposite side of
, he lawn is a rose walk , covered with
nasses of climbing white , pink-tinted !
ind tea roses. In the middle it be- !
jins again , and extends lengthwise-
learly the depth of the grounds , sup- ,
jorted the whole distance by pillars.
> f climbing roses and forming the fis-j
ire of a cross. Tea and coffee , thin'
jread and. butter and cake , were serv- ' .
sd by neat-handed maidens , from ,
jxquisite china , under the aspens , and
jay chat and music by Mr. Pfeiffer ,
who possesses a rich baritone voice ,
Bade the sunny hours of our Fourth
) f July afternoon pass all too swiflty.
On our way home we stoppeded to
pay our respects to Lady Wilde , whose
iniall house in Mayfair was crowded
with well known personages. Oscar
vas there , but not his wife. Oscar is
; he proud and happy father of a son ,
ivho is not , however , 1o bear his
famous first name ; the patronynic of
; he little stranger has not yet been de-
sided upon. 1 was very pleased my
self to meet here Mrs. Fenwick Miller ,
svhose life of Harriet Martineau has
ippeared in the famous Women Series ,
also Mrs. Leigh Adams and other
London authors whose names were
familiar. Mr. Oscar Wilde has im
proved in appearance , dropped his
peculiarities of dress , and was easy ,
cordial and natural in manner ; he
looked like what he undoubtedly is , a
very happy man. His brother "Will"
Is taller even than Oscar and very
solid and sensible-looking. Both seem
devoted to their mother , who is more
eccentric in appearance than Oscar
himself in his most eccentric days.
She is as tall , or taller than either of
her sons , wears her hair long and
dressed with ribbons , and on this oc
casion a dress in the early English or
'Dolly Varden" style with a profusion
of lace , which was far from unbecom
ing. She is credited with much ability ,
and certainly writes well on a variety
of subjects. She receives in rooms
that are so darkened by curtains ( red
and old gold ) as to render it at first
difficult to discern objects. Afterwards
the living objects appear in relief and
more like animated silhouettes.
The evening of this memorable
Fourth of July was spent at the'Ly
ceum Theatre , where Mr. Irving's
One study of the Vicar , in the "Vicar
of Waketield , " will take rank with his
Louis XI. , and must be placed in the
eallery of eminent stage portraitures.
It is all the more distinct and remark
able because a serious study of a simple
minded and pious clergyman upon the
stage is so rare. Usually they are
mere strings upon which to hang a
series of gags , but the "Vicar of Wake-
field" is a refined and intellectual
portrait , faithful to the minutest de
tail , fit to place in the small gallery
of the most illustrious impersonation s
and keep in one's memory forever.
The Olivia of Miss Terry is not so hap
py , nor was Mr. Terriss equal to him
self as Squire Thornhill both played
with their parts more than was fitting
for the unity of the performance ,
which was idylic in its sentiment and
perfectin its realism.
The theatres are playing their last
nights and will soon close , except
some few that remain open all sum
mer. Mrand Mrs. Bancroft are play
ing their last nights previous to retir
ing from the stage , which thny dp in
the midst of the honors of a brilliant
professional career. Mrs. Bancroft is
still a very handsome and attractive
-woman , .and of Lady Henry Fairfax in
{ Diplomacy , " which is a mere sketch ,
.6he makes quite a feature of the play.
'Mrs. ' Bernard Beere was the Countess
Zicka not a powerful actress but a
picturesque Ipoldng woman who dress
es characteristically in rich aesthetic
gowns and artistic 'ornaments. A
most admirable actress is Mrs. Ken
dall , whom we saw in tho "Money
Spinner" and a sketch written for her
self and husband , "On a Desert Isl
and , " or something to that effect.
It is exceedingly clever , and the two
pieces exhibited the versatile qualities
of the actress. I had a conversation
with her subsequently and inquired if
she had any intention of coming to
jAmerica. She thought not. She said
she could never make up her mind to
leave her children , her "very comfort
able" home and the pleasures of an
assured social position. Mrs. Kendall
is one of the exceptions to the major
ity of actresses living in London in
the social consideration she enjoys
and the perfect harmony of her do
mestic life. Then , while "a very high
ly trained and admirable all-around
actress , she does not possess sensa
tional qualities nor the youthful pret-
tiness which are such passports to
American favor. I was sorry not to
see the old Union Square favorite , for
the-past four years one of the most
attractive members of tho company at
'
the Haymarkct , Miss Linda' Dietz.
She has , I believe , gone to America
with her mother and sister , but wheth
er to remain I do not know.
"The Mikado" is drawing phenom
enal houses at the Savoy Theatre. It
was impossible to get seats within tho
limit of our stay in London , every
thing being booked weeks in advance.
The latest novelty at tho theatres has
been produced at the Corned } ' , with
Miss Amv Roselle in tho leading part.
It is called "The Silver Shield" and is
a very bright play , a little choppy in
the first act which might very easily
be improved a capital second act and
a very good third act , notwithstand
ing a little anti-climax. Miss Amy
Roselle does some excellent work in
it , and Miss Kate Rorker also , though
the latter is a little overweighted by
the melodrama of her principal situa
tion , her forte being that of a charm
ing ingenue. Mr. Beau-Champ , who
played an important part , is the only
actor I have seen who would make a
worthy successor to the late Mr. John
Parselle of the Union Square Theatre.
Our visits to Stoke Pogis and the
"Old Chesire Cheese" tavern must be
reserved for another letter.
/
Copyrighted by G. W. Hanna.
Brains and Business Depression.
When asked to give his opinion as
to the cause of business depression in
America , a gentleman replied , with
considerable emphasis : "Too much
brains , sir. " It is barely possible that
there may bo something in this rather
original solution of a difficult problem.
When one man m a crowd has brains
he becomes the leader of the others.
They work with their hands , and so
save themselves the responsibility of
thinking. He gets pretty nearly all
there is , and they have what is left.
He is the aristocrat and they are tho
common people.Vhen , however , the
whole crowd have brains , and know
how to use them , they are unwilling
to serve , because they wish to
be masters. Whatever good is to be
had each will contrive to get his
share.
It is the peculiarity of every free-
born American citizen that he believes
in his right to the possession ot"a cor
ner lot and an ample fortune. He
disdains service and spends his time
in contriving. With our public schools
behind us , with every possibility
round about us , we are a nation of
brigadier generals. No people on the
earth are so unwilling to do merely
manual work , and none are so capable
or doing brain wurk. Not a boy on
the continent but expects to be
a millionaire ; not one who _ is
not leaning forward and reaching
forward.
This brings the unhappiness of nu
merous disappontraents. Certainly ,
but it averages up the wjjole people's
ability to do and be in iTvery wonder
ful way. It makes us restless , without
doubt ; ' it creates competitions of the
fiercest kind ; it involves commercial
" end in dis
risks "which too frequently
aster ; but it makes a people who have
a tremendous impetus for great
achievements. New York Herald.
The Shoe Clerk's Criticism.
"Oh , Charley , isn't Miss Agnes
a lovely actress ? I never saw the
emotions depicted so ably. I think
she is every bit as grand as Clara Mor
ris , " remarked a Bedford ayenue girl
to her beau.
"Humph ; I don't see anything emo
tional in her acting ; her emotions
me natural" replied Charley.
"Then that makes her alljthe better.
Now , that scene where she is torn
from her child ; didn't you notice that
sad , agonized look ? And the tears
actually stood in her eyes. How on
earth does she do it ? "
"Easy enough. She wears number
four shoes. "
"Number four shoes ! What's that
got to do with it ? "
"Oh , those shoes she had os to-
nio-ht were number twos. I sold them
to" her this morning. Emotion be
blowed. Tight shoes will make an
emotional actress out of any woman.
*
The Small Boy's Quest.
A Persian philosopher being asked
by what method he had acquired so
much knowledge answered : "By not
being prevented by shame from ask
ing questions when I was ignorant. "
According to this notion a 5-year-old
boy traveling in the cars with his
mother , ought to acquire enough
knowledge in a journey of iif teen miles
to split his head wide open. Norris-
town Herald.
An honest backman Las been discovered in
New Ibrk. Next thing we know somebody
will ran down an Incorruptible politician , or
marry a woman who doesn't talk about hrr
neighbors.
AN INDIAN LEADER SLAIN.
Bloody Events In the Life of tho Notorious
Eenegade , Nane.
Bloodthirsty Nane. chief of tho rene
gade Indians , is reported to have been
killed , writes a Doming , New Mexico ,
correspondent to 'JheAcw York World.
For nearly five years ho has been tho
leader of the marauding redskins who
have periodically swooped down from
their hiding-places in the mountains
across the Mexican border and terror
ized the people of southern New Mexi
co and Arizona. If the report proves
true , it will be welcome news to tho
ranchmen and miners of this and ad
joining territor } ' . JSane was not a
hereditary chief. Previous to the
death of Victoriohe was the lieutenant
of that chief , and since that time has
been the moving spirit in all the mur
derous deeds of the redskins commit
ted in tho southwest. Physically he
was a typo of tho ideal Indian painted
by Fenimore Cooper. Over six feet in
height and of commanding presence ,
noted for his prowess , a good shot ,
and a fine horseman , hovas both fear
ed and admired by his renegade fol
lowers. But there was not one re
deeming trait in his character ; ho did
not even nave a grievance. He rose
to leadership simply because ho was
reckless and bloodthirsty.
Old Victorio , the ostensible leader
of tho raids prior to tho au turns of
1880 , believed he was avenging his
wrongs. For years his tribe had in
habited Ihe southern portion of New
Mexico. Ther had practically been
unmolested until the regiment of fed
eral volunteers from the Pacific slope ,
known as the California column , set
tled in what is now known as Grant
county at the close of the war. Min
ing camps had been established some
years before , but the whites were not
numerous , and got along as well as
possible with tho reds. When immi
gration set in the Indians were crowd
ed out of the mountains , where rich
deposits of gold , silver , and copper
were found. There were periods of
prolonged hostility and lighting , and
finally the government was forced to
locate Victorio's band on a reservation
at Ojo Calieute , in Socorro county.
Here they liveduntil their removal to
the San Carlos ajrency in eastern Ari
zona was ordered. Victorio made a
piteous appeal to bo permitted to re
main where his fathers were buried.
The region , however , was fast settling
up , and the new-comers declared that
the Indians must go. Besides , the reds
frequently attacked ranches , camps ,
and small settlements , and were con
tinually thieving and running oft'stock.
It was thought best to place"them un
der more strict surveillance at San
Carlos , whither most of the tribes of
Arizona were removed. Victorio and
his tribe were compelled to leave their
old home , but shortly after , in 1878 ,
they broke away. Other malcontents
went with them , and then commenced
a reign of terror. After being out for
a time they returned to San Carlos ,
but became discontented. They broke
away a second time , and , after com
mitting some depredations , Maj. Mor
row , who had been sent out after them
with a large force of troops , had a
conference with the chief near Ojo
Caliente.
Victorio promised to live quietly if
he could have his old home. The
officer had no authority to make a
treaty with him , and Victorio , after
waiting to hear from the authorities ,
commenced his career of pillage and
atrocities. He knew the country and
the military did not. His force "lived
by plundering and flitted about , while
the troops moved slowly to keep near
the supplies. The renegades played
hide-and-seek with the troops until the
summer of 1880. The development of
southern New Mexico was kept back.
Capital could not be induced there and
BO much complaint was made that the
war department was obliged to order
a more active campaign. The United
States troops , by co-operating with
the Mexican forces under Gen. Ter-
rassas , drove Victorio and his band
from range to range into the state of
Chihuahua. While the Mexican troops
were on a big spree a lot of Mexican
herders crept up a canyon in the
Barracha * ( drunken ) mountains during
Lhe night and at dav break attacked
Victorio's camp. They slaughtered
squaws , bucks , and children indis
criminately and among the rest Vic
torio. During his murderous cam
paign he had become palsied and was
in able to get away. Kane , who had
practically conducted the raids , was
: > ne of those who escaped , and he vow
ed that for every one of his tribe that
lad been killed he would massacre
live Mexicans and Americans. He got
together the scattered band , constant
ly receiving reinforcements from mal
contents who left the agencies , and
las made repeated raids over the Mex-
can border. Hundreds of people have
aeen killed by his band. Most of his
; ime was spent in the mountains of
Chihuahua and Sonora , and northern
states of Mexico , except when actually
on the warpath.
Gen. Crook who had earned the rep
utation of an Indian fig liter in Arizona ,
andlatbin the Rosebud campaign in
the northwest , was transferred to the
command of the district of Arizona in
June , 188.3. He immediately organi
zed an expedition , and went into Old
Mexico to capture Nane and his baud.
But the Indians drew him into a trap ,
and then made terms with him , only
Ihe squaws and old bucks returning to
: he agency. Nans was regarded as
the ringleader of all tHe deviltry , and ,
although at first he-shared the honors
of chief with Tomas and El Loco ( the
fool ) , he soon superseded both of
them. Chief Geronimo was the lead
er of one branch of the marauders.
Life in a Flat.
Judge Kennebunker , a cynical old
bachelor , lives with his dog in the nail
room of a New York fiat. As he was
looking out of the window. Miss Van-
pelt , who lives on the fiat below , stuck
lier head out of the window , and call
ed up : '
"Your nasty dog barks all night"
"But he doesn't play on the piano
all day. "
The lower window came down
with a bans that sounded * like a
safe being blown open. Texas Sift-
ings.
Meetinar of .Emperors.
There is a lesson to young mon m
the preparations that are being mado
for thii meeting between tho Czar of
Russia and the Emperor of Austria.
No doubt many young mon have am
bitions to become czars or emperors ,
but there is nothing in it. It is more
trouble than it is worth. These two
men , for they are nothing but com
mon men , desired to meet each other
and talk it over. Instead of one visit
ing tho other , as ordinary mon would
do , they agreed about a year ago , to
meet half way , and engineers were
set to work to take measurements , and
find a town that was exactly half way
between the two capitals. Tho town
of Kremzier , in Mora via , was selected ,
and before it was made public what
place thev were to meet , tho town was
taken possession of by troops from both
great 'powers , and surrounded by
police and military , so a mouse could
not get in or out of the town without
being stepped on. Then arrangements
were mado to transport the two great
men to the meeting place , and rail
roads and bridges were guarded for
fear some eiiemv would blow them up.
Millions of dollars are being expended
for protection , for decorations , and
for music and entertainment. The
town is guarded all around , and no
person is allowed to enter or to leave
without a pass , and every person who
enters tho town is under police sur
veillance , has his lodgings pointed put
to him , and ho has to ha ve everything
he owns searched , to guard against dy
namite. These crowned heads will bo
overcome with nervous prostration ,
and their bodies will be on nettles un
til they are once more safe home , and
within their castles. They arc
"loved" by their people , and yet they
expect to be murdered any minute.
They will bo dressed in purple and
lino linen , decorated with precious ,
stones , and live on the fat of tho land ,
after some subject has tasted of each
dish to see if it is poisoned , and they
will seem to be having a real nico
visit , but they will expect every
minute to havo their hinds legs blown
off by dynamite , or be shot , or poison
ed. "Why should they tako all this
trouble , and rlm'so many chances , and
go to so much expense , simply to talk
together for a little while , when for a
penny they could send a postal card
containing all they want to say ? The
telegraph or telephone could do tho
work , and tho great men could breath
freel3r , which they cannot do when
they meet as proposed. What business
man in America , or what laboring
man who is earing a fair living would
change places with the Czar or Em
peror ? America has lost two Presi
dents by assassination , but it was the
work of cranks. Even with this
record before us , our presidents go
where they please unprotected * and
unarmed. The American president
rides about tho capital.and the country
surrounding it like any private citizen ,
with no fear , while an emperor , to tako
a ride , has to be surrounded with an
army. The American president takes
a tomato can full of angle worms and I
goes oil' to tho woods fisliing , with one
or two companions , and is in no more
danger than a private citizen. An
emperor , to go fishing , would have to
surround the spot where he fished
with an army , anfl then he would feel
that he was afraid to get a bite for fear
if lie pulled on tho fish it would be
connoted with a mine that would blow
up the lake. Poor emperors , we feel
for you. Pecks Sun.
OIF the"Bench. .
"Our want column" more back
bone in our public men.
Text for anthracite dealers
"the weigh of the transgressor is
hard. "
A good many federal officers
are getting into reduced circum
stance * .
Is there no air-berafc that can
bo applied to long-winded speak
ers ?
Why is a common sort of man like
suicide ? 'Cause he's a fellow , d'u
see ?
An agent's sign near a street-
cleaner's dump-scow on the East River
reads with literalness , "Real estate
for sail. "
Why does no bublic benefactor
found an asylum for the ; n-
saue ? Sanctums and pulpits are in
adequate.
"The question of the day" Is this
hot enough for you ? The ditto of tho
night How d"id the thermometer
stiTnd to-day ?
Figs are not sweetened to preserve
thorn , Johnny ; they are only dried up
in their own sugar , like elderly maid
ens. The worms are planted m them
later. The Judge.
Caught iu a Ghost Trap.
Several experiments have been tried
by persons anxious to secure a ghost
and to receive the reward offered bv
the Soc ety for Physical Research fo'r
a live ghost delivered on the society's
premises. One man residing in a
haunted house covered tho middle of
the floor of a room in which a ghost
was in the habit of walking with an
inch of soft and very tenacious asphalt.
The following night the ghost , who
was an unusually largo one , tried to
walk over the asphalt and stuck fas *
in it. The experimenter instantly
rushed to the ghost with withes o"f
witch hazel , and , as he might have ex
pected , stuck fast himself just out of
reach of the ghost. The latter , after
a few minutes of struggling , extrica
ted himself and disappeared , but the
investigator remained glued to the spot
all night , and was pried out by the
servants in tho morning Hortseholti'
Wordi.
_
Was the 31 au.
As Colonel Billson was goinsr down
"
the steps he met a suspicious"looking
boy with a lot of bills.
"Is Colonel Billson's office up
stairs ? "
"Yes , but I'm not in or rather the
colonel's not in.7'
"Ain't you the man ? "
"No , my son. "
"I'd like to find him. I've got a
telegraph money order for him. "
"Let's see. Who is the man yoa
want ? "
"Colonel Billson. "
"I thought you said Colonel Bill-
ings. I am Colonel Billson. " Ark-
ansaw Traveler.
! i