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About The Omaha morning bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 1922-1927 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 16, 1924)
The Morning Bee MORN1N G—E V E N I N G—S U N D A Y THE BEE PUBLISHING CO.. Publisher N. B. UPDIKE, President BALLARD DUNN. JOY M. HACKLER. Editor in Chief. Business Manager. MEMBER OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS Tha Associated Press, of which The Bee is a member, la exclusively entitled to *he use for publication of all news dispatches credited to it or not otherwise credited in this paper, and also the local news published herein. All rights of republication of our special dispatches are also reserved. The Omaha Bee is a member of the Audit Bureau of Circulations, the recognized authority on circulation audits, and Tha Omaha Bee’s circulation is regularly indited by their organizations. Entered as second-class matter May 28, 1908, at Omaha postoffice under act of March 3, 1879. BEE TELEPHONES Private Branch Exchange. Ask for \ m i _i* 1 Ann the Department or Person Wanted. A 1 ianuc AUW OFFICES Main Office—17th and Farnam Co. Bluffs—15 Scott St. New York—World Bldg. Chicago—Tribune Bldg. St. Louis—Syn. Trust Bldg. San Fran.—Hollrook Bldg. So. Side. N. W. Cr. Z4th N. Detroit-—Ford Bldg. Kansas City—Bryant Bldg. Los Angeles—Higgins Bldg. A;lanta—Atlanta Trust Bldg. --- DON’T ROCK THE BOAT. THERE IS A REAL MAN AT THE HELM. “We’re all a bit selfish accordin’ to my^tell,” remarked Mrs. Means to the Hoosier Schoolmaster. Even so, and there is ju^. a bit of the barbarian , in .many of us. This fact is noted every time tome public man is put upon the rack. Immediately the cry goes up to crucify him. Men who ordinarily may be relied upon for cool judgment are stam peded, and they join in the cry. Let the cry of “Stop theif 1” ring out on the air, and you may depend upon it the mob will soon be shouting the same thing, although wholly ignorant of the facts. And it will be remembered that the Artful Dodger cried it the loudest as poor, frightened Oliver Twist scuttled down the street. This unreasoning clamor for the indiscriminate scalping of public men is no new thing. No new thing even in the case of presidents of the United States. A cabal demanded the official scalp of George Washington, and many otherwise reasoning men, ignorant of the facts and unwilling to wait until they could become known, joined in the hue and cry. General Grant suffered from the same thing, but there was in the White House then, as now, a man who could not be deceived by public clamor nor stampeded by threats. . President Cleveland was villified and abused without limit, but then as now the White House was occupied by a map who refused to be stampeded or to succumb to the clamor of the restless mob. President Wilson was denounced and traduced because he did not immediately and blindly plubge the country into the maelstrom of war. But then, as now, the White House was occupied by a man of iron nerve, courageous heart and firm convictions, who refused to be coerced or stampeded. From the beginning of the republic, down to the present day, there have been eras of vociferous ■ clamor, of unstinted abuse, of demands for mob law against public officials. But, glory be, there has always been in the White House, even as there is now, a cool, cou rageous, strong man who refused to trim his sails to cstch the passing breeze, who refused to be stam peded, who held fast to the Constitution and the laws of the land, and steered the old ship of stste through the troubled waters until the storm ceased and the waves subsided. President Coolidge is proving himself the msn for the great emergency. Above the shrieks of those demanding that public officials be crucified without even so much of a trial as was vouchsafed another in Pilate’s day, is heard his quiet voice de manding that reason resume its sway and that jus tice be accorded with even hand. The president is manfully adhering to the sol emn oath he took to protect and defend the Con stitution. He is zealously safeguarding every right of the accused, as the law contemplates shall be done for even the vilest criminal. With equal de termination he is insisting upon prosecution of the guilty and the hunting out under the law of all the details of the sorry thing. The frenzied cries of partisan critics or confirmed pessimists will not suffice to swerve him from the constitutional course he has laid out. Gratifying indeed it is to know that once again, as always before in time of great crisis, the White House is occupied by a man who is capable of rising to the occasion and holding fast to the Constitution despite all efforts to stampede him. There is an orderly and constitutional method of ■searching out and punishing those who have violated their oaths of office, or who have spit upon the Con stitution and the laws of their country. God pity America when that orderly and consti tutional method shall be abandoned and the people misled by partisan hate and clamor into adopting the lew of the mob! This is the time for thoughtful and patriotic men tp stes to the front and uphold the hands of the president. CONCESSIONS AT THE CONVENTION. Percy Hammond, in the New York Tribune, gibes gently at the promoters of the democratic national convention. Enumerating what lie conceives to be the thought of those who have arrangements in hand, he catalogues what he thinks actually will take place. For example, he says: “If I were of the avaricious type of democrat. I should like to own the cuspidor, toothpick, *the American flag, chewing gum and 10-cent cigar priv ileges of the convention. These commodities and a few other less worthy have been sometimes slmost as significant as the platforms, If not as the nomi nees.” Mr. Hammond is a veteran from Chicago, where conventions have been held so frequently they no longer arc regarded hb out of the ordinary. The townsfolk just learn the date, and then get ready to welcome the visitors to such a skinning that few ever forget and only the most enthusiastic ever want to go a second time. New York may prove to be something else again. However, American flags, 10 cent seegars and the other things set out are not exclusive to a demo cratic convention. Other great gatherings need them, whether in New York or elsewhere. While the great and the near great gather at such conventions, also there come the people, without whom no party can succeed. And the people, simple mannered and of direct minds, arc not likely to change materially habits of home to comply with customs of Gotham or any other towa, when they expect to stay a day nr two or a week at the outside. Anyhow, New York sought the convention, and got it away from some active competitors, thanks to T*x Rickard. Now, let New York do what is gen erous and hospitable in the way of entertainment. If it will it can make the people from away out west feel that the metropolis is not entirely without a heart. TURN OF TIDE IN FARMER’S FORTUNE. ' Moving slowly but certainly, the machinery of commerce is turning out relief for the harrassed wheat farmers of the country. A banking corpora tion, that will be empowered to loud up to $100, 000,000, formed of private capital, will soon be in operation. It is not, as stated, to scr^e as a relief station for distressed or damaged banks, but to pro vide a source of capital for farmers who will need aid while they are re establishing themselves on a new basis in diversified agriculture. Through this means it is proposed to open an avenue along which the one-crop farmer can move to a safer and solider position in agriculture. The next, encouraging point is the support that is given for the Williamson bill, intended to increase the tariff on wheat. Whether the relief comes through the new law, or on recommendation of the tariff commission that the president act under the existing law, the fact is that the tariff will be in creased. Inquiry by the tariff board has substantiated all that The Omaha Bee set up in support of the de mand for higher protection. Cost of production is so much higher in the United States than in Canada that equal competition is impossible. The 30-cent rate, as it now stands, is insufficient protection. Our contentiontion all along has been that the American wheat grower can not compete with Canada because of the difference in cost of production. This is now proved to the satisfaction of the government, and the official figures«have opened the eyes of the peo ple to a condition that was not well or generally un derstood. The McNary-Haugen bill, which provides a sys tem for marketing the surplus products of the farm, is receiving attention. While still in hands of the senate committee on agriculture, of which Norris of Nebraska is chairman, the measure has been strongly presented to the president, and has been discussed generally by those who are concerned in the future of farming. The measure is very similar in its scope to the Edge law, passed several years ago to facilitate the export trade in manufactured articles. It will enable the farmers to meet the more serious of their problems as a unit rather than individuals* One of its greatest services will be to offset the effect of the buying agencies of Europe. These agencies have enabled purchasers to beat down prices and secure terms more favorable than would be possible were the selling parties as well organized as the buging group. Some of this relief will come late, but it should have the effect of restoring health to a languishing industry. It will revive the courage of industrious men who have been greatly downcast by conditions they have had to face. The Omaha Bee has had a considerable part in the work that has brought about fhe cheering prospects for permanent relief. It takes a little pardonable pride in having been able to render real service to the region it represents. We will always be at the front, battling for the good of the great empire of the middlewest. LES50N FROM COUNCIL BLUFFS. Omaha folks can look and wonder at what took place in Council Bluffs. Within 36 hours of the time a brutal murder was committed, the murderer was on his way to serve a life term in the penitentiary. No complaint will be made at this acceleration of justice. It is proof that speed is possible in our courts. Also, it is assurance that the law is potent to punish crime. What a contrast to some exhibitions that have been given in Omaha. Men and women charged with murder have waited long for trial, and when brought to bar the trials have been prolonged in a fashion that is often exasperating. Fantastic tales have been recited at great length, requiring examin ation at equal or greater length, with no purpose in view but the muddling of the matter before the jury. Clever, resourceful lawyers have practiced all their craft in defense, sometimes with the reward of see ing their client go free, even after it was well estab lished that a human life had been snuffed out by the prisoner. Iowa has shown Nebraska what may be done. Imitation on this side of the river is now in order. Illinois coal miners are showing signs of common sense. They have refused to strike as a protest against the klan. Maybe they realize that the klan grows on that sort of opposition. Russians will have the pleasure of looking at a moving picture of the soviets signing u commerce treaty with Italy. This will be Tike giving a milk ticket to a hungry baby. President Ebert’s apology for the embassy flag incident is sincere, but it will be hard to overcome the impression created. Looks like a good year for the republicans in Nebraska. Else why do so many seek the nomina tion for governor? Herrin is reported to be quiet under modified martial law. It was noisy enough under a modified civil law. Great transformation scene is now being re hearsed in congress. House has the revenue bill in hand. Harry Sinclair will be available for the senate committee early next week. Watch for the sparring. Hon. Edgar Howard retains his unerring ability to detect the hoof prints of the money devil. The Salt Lake Tribune speaks of the “surtax snarl.” Certainly it has been provocative of many. _._._ — Homespun Verse —By Omaha's Own Poet— Robert Worthington Davie v_ Tin. ORPHAN kitty. A stray cat came to our house n looking sad and tldn. And little Hobble begged us to let the dumed thing In: Wu heard its plaintive culling when winds were cold and strong, We couldn't eee It suffer out doors the whole day long; And such 11 xenial playmate the orphan cat liaa lieen That we are more than grateful, wo let tha dumed thing,In. The mice had hoi t of taken (he cellar for themselves, And roamed In perfect leisure across the floor and shrives; We used to hear them skootlng so Joyfully shout, And laughing at the tempest and liMrenneas without. Hut they have somewhere vanlslwd their Jollity Is through. We hear Instead the kitty the orphan kitty mew. When I am thinking fondly of frlemlsIUps deep nml dea r, I can't forget the kitty that mews so sweetly here. And wo have*heard of mortals whose loyalty le small Heside the orphan kitty that might have none at all. And ws have often .pondered the truth of this and that, And yet It seems uncommon to pralsa an orphan cat. _ I By EDWIN G. PINKHAM. Why Unity and Nationality Were of * Slow Growth They ((hr Americans) can never be united into one compact empire under any species of government what ever; a disunited people till the end of time, suspicious aiul distrustful of each other, they tcill be divided and subdivided into little commonwealths or princijMtlities, according to national boutuiaries, by great bays of the sea. and by vast rivjers, lakes and ridges of mountains.— Josiah Tucker, dean of Gloucester. VII. E have seen how the tie I AAf I velopment of demooratlc in f stitutlons among American ISwSrinl colonists took its course Iftfain] from the circumstances in which they were placed. Their num bers were few and scattered, they were separated from the mother country by an ocean It took two months to cross. Their government, welfare and defense were thus thrown, to a largp extent, into their own hands. In this situation, with neither king nor parliament to help or hinder much, they sought the direct applica tion to their necessities of those prin ciples which at home were still pret ty much in a state of theory. It made little difference to the colonists whether a certain power of govern ment belonged to the king or to the parliament. Jf they needed it they used it. This familiarity with the processes of government w as something no Eng lish community could attain, and it was a natural result that in the course of a century Americans were much more politically educated than the English, and that English institu tlons in America were In a much more flourishing state than they were in the land where they first took root. The bantlings were cast on a rock amt had to learn to shift for them selves. They learned so well how’ to do it that they not only shifted with out the mother country, but without each other. This is a fact to remem ber as we go on, for unity was to be a slow growth and nationality a slower. The status of the colonies differed; some were royal and some proprietary, and until the close of the 17th century the English at the north and south were separated from each other |>y the Dutch. The one necessity they had In com mon was defense, and so early as 164? the Massachusetts Bay, Plymonth, Connecticut and New Haven colonies formed a defensive union agnlnst the Dutch, French and Indians. But unity never was an American Idea. The llrst suggestion of It, In fact, came from the English government which urged a union at the beginning of the French and Indian war, more than a ! century after the New England colonies had tried their first experi ment. A plan was drawn up by Ben jamin Franklin and submitted to the Albany convention In 1754. It pro vided for a union of all the English colonies with a common legislative as sembly and an executive called a president general. But the Idea was too startling for the times and awoke apprehension' nil around; both the crown Rnd the colonies rejected it. These early Indications are Import ant to note, far they point us to the character of the political development that was going on. Each colony re garded Itself as Independent of the others, and It was during this early period that the Idea of local self government took Its firm root. An other thing thst kept the colonic* apart was the diverse chsracter of the Immigration that name from England. With the defeat of Charles large numbers of royalists came to the colonies, settling mostly In the south. The Puritlan Immigration had been to the north. Between these two groups there was something of the feeling that had kindled the fires of civil war in England; a feeling that derived partly from class and partly from religion. It was to remain, under changing forms and with Important results, for many generations. Yet there was a- process going on that In the end was to overcome all these difficulties. As Englishmen these neighbors might lie Cavaliers or Roundhead*. Churchmen. Separatists or Quakers, hut as colonists thev were Americans* Nationality was at work though unsuspected. Just as Nor mans In the twelfth century became Englishmen because they were cut off from their own land and shut up on an Island, ho Englishmen In the eight eenth century, Isolated on a continent with an ocean on one side and a wild erness on the other, became Amer icans. But we must not think of them *s I elnir neighbors In nny ordinary sense. In Virginia there were rigid distlnc. lions of class. Here was a country life srlstocrary that lived on scatter ed plantations amt built no towns. What towns there were consisted of a court house and a church. Nobody lived In the towns, because there wit nothing there to support life. A town with a store In tt was a rarity— at the most there would be a black • ■ ' '■ ■■ ' * ■ ■■ ■ ■■ - — i i ' 1 ' ' 11^. I Abe Martin \ "That reminds tni\ I've got some wood t’ saw," said Jake Bentley, t'day, when Mrs. Tipton Bud shifted gears. Th' feller that thinks seriously o' gittin’ married hardly ever marries. Opyrltht. 112* smith shop. This was true of Virginia generally for more than 100 years after Its settlement; even its capital, Williamsburg—a college town to boot —had as late as 1760 only two brick houses. There were mwroads and no trade except that overseas, and the James river was the highway to the sea. That this aloof country life of the southerners had its political in fluence In after centuries is one of the outstanding facts in our history. But where Virginia had parishes as the local political unit, Massachusetts had towns, and consequently a diff erent social life. Political contacts also would be closer. In New Eng land the town was in a sense the product of legislation, as this ordi nance of the Plymouth authorities witnesses: “Noe dwelling • howse shai be buiite above halfe a myle from the meeting.howse in any newe plan tation without leave from the court, except rnylle-howses.” This would bring the settlers clustering pretty closely about thp church. Gregarious uess made for trade, and the New Englanders were craftsmen and shop keepers rather than planters. Per haps It waa for similar reason* that they became so powerful in conversa tion—they had a government of talk. All of New England was a parliament. Where South Carolina started out with a plan of government devised by a couple of English philosophers— Locke and Shaftesbury—with orders of nobility all neatly ranged, New England began as a thorough democ racy, its government being adminis tered by mass meetings where all pub lic laws and regulations were made. Here was no delegated authority, every Citizen appearing and speaking for himself. Nothing like this was known^ in England. Only when the New England colonies spread beyond the bounds of a single settlement was the representative system intro duced. Then we see local legislature* everywhere, and with them the grow ing Idea that they provided all the government the colonies needed. Even this early centralization was an Idea jrepugnant to democratic thinking, and was to grow more so, ss we shall see. (Copyright, Kansas City Btar ) "The mlllenlum will never com*,” mourns Editor Carlson of the Aurora. Republican. "As long as the tribe that know how to run a newspaper better than the editor persist upon the face of the earth.” • • • ■‘In the good old days It sat always considered proper to pile additional taxes on the saloons; nowadays auto mobile owners sre expected to dig whenever additional taxes are re quired.” complains Ols Buck of the Harvard Courier. • • • One disappointment about a visit to your boyhood home is that you meet so many people who hadn't missed you." confesses Lew Shelley of the Falrbury News. • • • "If the editor of the TImes Tribune happened to be so lucky as to win that *100.000 peace prize they'd have to call out the troops to keep the peace," admits Editor Fletch Slerwin. • s • "Where, O where Is Governor Bryan and his big stick!” walls W. ' H. Weekes of the Norfolk Pres# as he note# the mounting price of gasoline. • • • Alan May of the Auburn Herald tells of a man who doesn't own an auto hut bought a license plate, ex pectlng to buy a car as soon as he got his corn plsnted snd could mortgage the crop. see The Wayne Democrat admits that Teapot Dome has proved to be quite a gusher. Tlie Awful Exception. Husband—-This tomato soup tastes Just like that my mother used to make. Wife—I'm glad to hear it. You have never said before that anything of mine wag as good as your moth er'* Khe wa* a fine cook, t suppose. Husband—Yes. Thera was only one thing she couldn't make properly. Wife—What vva* that? Husband—Tomato soup! — Kasper. Stockholm. Not So New. The traveler had returned to hi* native village after itelng abroad for JO years. He stopped as* he saw a little boy with a small baby coming down the road. "Ah! a new face, I see!" "No! It isn't, sir,” replied the boy, looking at the baby. "It's Just be»n washed, that's all!"—Western Chris Man Advocate (Cincinnati). ‘‘The People’s Voice* Editorials from readers of Tip Mornin* Bee. Readers of The Mornin* Ret are invited to us* this column freely for expression on matters of public interest. From an Appreciative Header. Osceola, Neb.—To the Editor of The Omaha Bee: I wish to express my ap preciation for the very fine editorial In this morning's paper, “lie Stood the Stern Teat." When newspapers keep in mind that it is their duty as well as their privilege to “teach" as well as to “te'l,” then will our people of the United StatvH begin to remember tho great heritage that is llieits to main tain. O. E. WICKET. Critical Word* From a Friend. Waterloo, Neb.—To the Editor 'of The Omaha Bee: In readip*your edi torial on "Men Who Are Making Omaha," the Impulse came to me to write you a few lines. I have won-, dered for many years why such papers as are published In your fair city seem to have such antagonistic rivalry between one another. I will draw an illustration for you, using my own business as an exam ple. that of a blacksmith and auto repair shop. Here we go: 1 eharpened 50 plow lays today, and during the past month 1 have overhauled 10 autos. My nearest competitor only sharpened 20 yesterday and during the past month he has overhauled three cars. Last fall I put In 30 wagon poles and Jones only put In seven. Look at the lead I have over Jones and Smith (and this emblazoned on full-page addsi. Vou don't see "Brandeis does so and so and Haydens only did so much, and look how much we 'beat' Burgess Nash last year," etc., etc. 1 believe you can get my drift. And this ha* been going on for years be tween The Omaha Bee and Its es teemed contemporary. This may not mean anything at all. but It Just occurs ’.o me as Injudicious advertising. 1 often wondered If It occurred to* other people In the same light that it has to me. Cut out the personal comparisons. Tell the world what you are doing—that's fine—but leave the other fellow out In person. No. I don't know a bloomin' thing about running a newspaper, but just, wonder how it would look on you^ pages If all lines of business used that method. I believe it w ill help Omaha to have Its papers get together on a more brotherly basis and boost more for each other and then combine the ef forts of all as a unit for Omaha. In my 22 years of business I have never knocked a competitor. What do you say? This goes for the World Herald. too. Please let them copy or see that they do, if you see fit to use this. "THE VILLAGE BLACKSMITH." I-aitlifuJ Service. Kmerson, Neb.—To the Kditor of The Omaha Bee; While reading over our valued paper this evening I came across this Item, "Faithful Underpaid Servants.-’ Also this tribute: " Nei ther rain or snow, or heat of day or gloom of night shall stay these couriers from their duly appointed rounds,-' and goes on to tell the hard ships of the mail carrier and tell* how underpaid they are. I agree with anyone who says that is true, but I ran name you a group of men who are just as faithful a* the mail carrier and are expected to live on far les* wages than J1.400 a year. These wages are J974 if no tlma is lost through sickness, and they are expected to answer the cal! for a broken rail In zero weather, or an electrical storm, or whatever kind of weather we have at the time, in the night or In the day. While I be lieve the mail carriers are a faithful lot, I can't help but wonder how far the mall would get If It wasn't for the maintenance of way men that keep the track in order, so the many aouls get safely bv and the mall ar rives at its destination. Can't It be staid that they, too, are servants of the people in the truest sense of the word? If the mail carrier can't live on his | wage* of from 81.400 to 11,800, I wonder what the rail labor board ex pects of the faithful men who work for the mere pittance they do. Their wage* don't enable them to clothe themselves properly to withstand the col'l which they are called upon to be out in from 8 o'clock in the morning until 5 in the evening. Many times, ears. Angers, noee and toes are frozen in an effort to keep the track in con dition. \\ hen sickness comes from exposure, there Is nothing for doctor's bill or care that the sick one needs, as It la impossible to live on their wages, I once heard It stated that a living wage was a wage that enabled the man and Ids family to live In mod erate comfort, and I in here to tell you that the section man doesn't even live, he simply exists from one month to another. I can name a family with five chil dren. where the man has been laid up with rheumatism for four months (a section man), and if not for the char Itv here In our little town that man and his family would have suffered terribly, ns he was not m iking a liv ing before, so there wasn't anything laid up to carry him through In a time of trouble. oh. the shame of It, to think men have to work for such low wages, that they have to live on the mercy of the people when sickness comes. A SECTION MAN'S WIFE. BLUE CAB CO. Meter Rates—Prompt Service CALL AT-3322 When You Rent T ypewriters be sure that you rent machines that will do good work. Our stock of rental machines is kept in good running condition, so that if you need any extra typewriters for rush work you can depend upon them. For rates and other information, write or call. Special Rental Rates to Students Typewriter* Rented—Rebuilt Typewriter* L. C. Smith & Bros. Typewriter Co. Omaha Branch, 1905 Harnay Si. JA ck.on 2213 SUNNY Si UP '%Ue Comfort,nor fin-nt • JhatSmriniwnrfaiUdvsgt THE 8I'M OF IJFE. A little cheer to make day* seem brighter, Some kindly acts as we go along: A little lift to make load* ecejn And hearts o erflowlng with lilting song. _ A warm handclasp for a stricken neighbor. A lifting arm for a friend down cast; Jov In a chance just to live and labor. And friends to cling to until the last. Tlie will to do ev’ry simple duty. The heart to stick till t,he task is done: A fulth that holds to the simple beauty Of looking l«ick on a race well run. Mope that will vanquish all doubt and fearing, Eyes that can vision the far-off goal; Strength to endure while the clouds are clearing. Courage of heart, and stout of soul. Patience to wait until Justice, sleep ing. Wakens to sift out the souls of men; Courage to tight all the evils creep ing. Polng the best we can—arid then. Facing the future with faith that strengthens. Willing to take what the records tell; Onward still while the shadows lengthen, Waiting- to hear the words. "All's well!” J. K. Baggstrom of Wausa attended the telephone convention in Omaha this week. He knows quite a bit about the telephone business, having experienced a strike of patrons some time ago. His company did serve Wausa, Crofton and Bloomfield, hut the Bloomfield patrons went on strike, and It made good newspaper copy while it lasted. Ills company now serves only Wausa and Crofton. But that isn't the story. Wausa and the country round about is the li ly settled with people of Swedish birth or parentage, and Is jokingly called a "Swede town." When the world war broke out there was natur ally some suspicions about communi ties where foreign born citizens pre dominated. so Mr. Baggstrom had some big signs painted und erected on the highways leading into his town. They read as follows, as nearly as type can reproduce them: A KWEDB TOWN BCT WeAreU.S A. Kpeaking of things malapro pos, one happened at a prenuptial dinner party staged at an Omaha ho tel one night this week. Friends of the prospective bride and groom ten dered the dinner party, and all went well while the feast was on. After the dinner the bride to-be was toasted, and then a male member of the party sang a song now quite popular, "You're the Kind of Girl that Men Forget.” Ole Burk say* he wishes it was a* easy for his wife to see a button off his mat as It is for her to see a blonde hair on it. If ever a blonde hair nestled on file's coat it was tie cause the wind blew it there. The sight of a crow-d around a street hawker always Intrigues us. We can no more resist the urge to Join the crowd than we can the im pulse to Jump when an automobile looms close at hand. No matter what the street hawker may be selling, unless it happens to be a patent medi cine. It Is seldom that we fall to fail for his blandishments. As a result we huve a choice assortment of ; tato peelers, combination penci l arc fountain pens, phony Jewelry.knh' that will cut nothing, pen pointst: will not write, and other brie a l ia Whenever a street hawker see* u« approaching he knows by Inst nr t that there is a sale in immediate prospect. _ Concerning the application of ar aviator for a divorce on the grout) that his wife's constant nagging con pelled him to make forced landing we have ail along been <4 the opin hat a wife's constant nagging was more likely to l eap a husband up ;r. the air. _ "'Pears t' me." observed'Hick Do> dledum of Dodgers Run, "that thei' air somethin' missln' erbout this senytour Investigation. What mout it be. Hick?” querk Duck Tweedledee of Lick Skill"' Grove. "Wall, ft does look t' me like as If some o’ them aenytours. a Judgin' t their actions, oughter be a weariru of long, white cotton nightgowns an peaked kind o’ caps." Somehow or other things happening every day remind us of the fact that It was the Artful Dodger and his pel who veiled "Stop thief" the loud<— when little Oliver Red down th" street. THE PESSIMIST. He simply ran not well enjoy A balmy, sunny day. Because he knows down In lit* sou A blizzard* on the way. During all the recent deluge of oll> money we weie like the starving ma who was out in a rain, of soup equipped with a seive and a fork. .Speaking of annoyances, there having nothing to do but read a boo . that holds no appeal. Referring to • recent mention the fact that February has live Fr; days and only four pay days for tin* department, word comes from crafls men with whom we used to labor that their pay day is Friday. About the saf* -* place I know ■ ' on a Sunday morning Is the inside of i church. Never knew- of a man Iss ng knocked galleywest by an auto mobile while listening to a good sei • unon or helping to sing one of the ;ocd old songs of Zion. The moral if which is the application thereof. Speaking of craftsmen with whot i we once foregathered this Is the time of year, combined with balmy weath er and warming sun, when we fee! the old urge to take our foot In our h%nd and, after securing the oil travelln' card, lightin' a knot out n here to anywhere. Only a bit more than the average amount of ballast accumulated s.s a family man serv s to hold us down. WILL, M. MAI'PIN. When in Omaha Hotel Conant • Safety for S^viner • •A • • • ujane ror rtBUMS ~' See This New Car Space 11 Automobile Show If this Signature i BROMO QUININE “There is no other BROMO QUININE" Proven Safe for more than a Quarter of a Century as a quic* nnd effective remedy for Colds. Grip and Influenza and as a Preventive. I--— ------—. The First and Original Cold and Grip Tablet j Piico 30 Cent*