RED CLOUD, NEBRASKA, CHIEF
l
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Ramsey Milholland
By BOOTH TARKINGTON
iiiiiiiiiifiiiiiititiiiiiiiiiiiiiiMiiiiitiiiiiiiiiitiliiiiiiiiiitiitiliiiitititiiiiiiiiiiiifiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiitiiifiiiiiiitiiiiiititiiiiiiiitiiiiiiitiuiiiir?
THE BOY, FATHER OF THE
MAN.
Here's anoUier of those Booth
Trklnton boy-and-slri stories
that set everyone laufhln and
Uyln over again the day of youth.
Tills one U much Ilka "Panred
and "Seventeen" and "The Oriole."
Tt' different, too, In that tt carries
Ramsey MlUolland and Dora Ye
cura through school and college
to early maturity In the World
War. 80 It's serious as wU m
runny, and It's ono Of Booth Tar
klnaton'S best of It kind. That's
enough.
30
CHAPTER I.
When Johnnie cosies marohlng home
a rain,
Hurrah I Hurrah I
We'll give mm a hearty welcome then,
Hurrah I Hurrah I
The men with cheers, the boys with
shouts,
Tho ladles they will all turn out.
And we'll all foel fray, whoa Johnnie
comos tnurchlnc home again I
Tlio old man and tho llttlo boy, bis
grntidfion, Bat togothcr la the shade of
the big walnut tree In the front yard,
watching tbo "Decoration Day Pa
rnde," as It passed up the long street;
and when the last of tho veterans was
out of sight the grandfather mur
mured tbo words of tho tunc thai come
drifting buck from tho now distant
band at tho head of tho procession.
"Did you, Grandpa?" tho boy asked.
"Did I whut?"
"Did you all feel gay when tho army
got homo?"
"It didn't got. home nil at once, pre
cisely," tho grandfather explained.
"When the war was ovor I suppose wo
felt relieved, more than anything else."
"You didn't feel so gay when the
war was, though, I guess 1" tho boy
ventured.
"I guess we didn't"
"Wero you scared, Grumlpn? Were
you ever scared tho Johnnies would
win?"
"No. We weren't ever afraid of
that."
"Well, weren't you ever scared your
self, Grandpa? I mean when you were
In a bnttle." .
"Oh, yes; I was." Tho old man
laughed. "Scnrcd aplenty I"
"I don't see why," tho boy said
promptly. "I wouldn't bo scared In n
battle."
"Wouldn't you?'?
"'Courso not I Grandpa, why don't
you march In tho Decoration Day pa
rade? Wouldn't they let you?"
"I'm not nhle to march any more.
Too short of breath and too shaky In
the legs and too blind."
"I wouldn't euro," said tho boy. "I'd
be In the parade nnywny, If I was you.
If I'd been In your place, Grandpa, and
they'd let mo be in tlint pnradc, I'd
been right up by the band. Look,
Grandpa I Watch me, Grandpa I This
' Is the way I'd be, Grandpa."
Ho rose from the garden bench
whero they sat, and gave. a complex
Imitation of what had most appealed
to him ns tho grandeurs of the pro
cession, his prancing legs simulating
those of the horse of tho grnnd mar
shal, whllo his upper parts rendered
the drums nnd bugles of tho band, ns
well aa tho olllcers nnd privates of the
mllltlu company which had been a fea
ture of the parade. Tho only thing
lie left out was tho detachment of
veterans.
"Putty-boom I Putty-boom I Putty-boom-boom-boom
1" ho vociferated, as
the drums and then as the bugles:
"Tn, ta, ra, tarn 1" lie addressed his
restive les: "Whon, there, you
Wbltoyl Geo I Haw I Git up I" Then,
waving nn Imaginary sword : "Col
lumn right I Fnrwud march I Zlnltl
Carry harms I" He "carried arms."
"Show-dlcr harms I" no "shouldered
arms," and returned to his seat.
"That'd be me, Grandpa. That's the,
way I'd do." And as the grandfather
nodded, seeming to agree, a thought
recently dismissed returned to tho
mind of the composite procession and
ho asked:
"Wcl'i why weren't you ever afraid
the Johnnies would whip the Unions,
Grandpa?"
"Ob, wo knew they couldn't."
"I guess so." Tho little boy laughed
disdainfully, thinking his question sat
isfactorily answered. "I guess those
ole Johnnies couldn't whipped a Heal
Thoy didn't know how to tight any at
all, did they, Grandpa?"
"Ob, yes, they dial"
"What?" Tho boy was astounded.
"Weren't they all Just reg'lar ole cow
ards, Grandpa?"
"N," said the grandfather. ''They
war pretty fine soldiers."
"They were? Well, they ran away
whatever you began' ahootln' at 'em,
didn't tney?"
"Sometimes tbey did,' but moat times
they didn't. Sometimes they fought
Ilka wildcats and sometimes wa were
the onei that ran away."
"But the Johnnies were bad men,
weren't they, Grandpa?"
"No."
The boy's forehead, customarily va
cant, showed some little vertical
ahadowa, produced by a straggle ta
think. "Well, but" he began slowly.
Listen, Grandpa, listen here I Yon
aid jrou said you never get scared
li ole Johnnies were sola' to win."
. "The, did. wlA iwatfct of ta." said I
tho grandfather. "They won a good
many battles."
"I mean, you said you never got
scared they'd win the war."
"No, we were never afraid of that."
"Well, but If they were good men
and fought like wildcat, Graadpa,
nnd kep winning battles and every
thing, how could that bo? How could
yeu help beln' scared they'd win the
war?"
The grandfather's fcoble eyes twin
kled brightly. "Why, we knew they
couldn't, Ramsey."
At this, the llttlo vertical shadows
on Ramsey's forehead became more
pronounced, for he had succeeded In
thinking. "Well, they didn't know they
couldn't, did thoy?" he argued. "They
thought they were goln' to win, didn't
they?"
"Yes; I guess thoy did. But you
see thoy wero wrong."
"Well, but" Itnmsey struggled.
"Listen 1 Listen here, Grandpn I Well,
anyway, If they never got scurcd we'd
win, and nobody got scared they'd win
well, I don't sec"
"You don't see what?"
But llnmscy found himself unable
to continue his concentration. "Oh,
nothln' much," ho murmured.
"I see." And his grandfather laughed
again. "You mean: If tho Johnnies
felt Just ns sure of winning tho wnr
as wo did and kept winning battles,
why shouldn't wo over have had any
doubts wo wero going to win? Tlint'u
it, Isn't It?"
"I guess so, Grandpa."
"Well, I think it was mostly because
wo wero certain that we were right."
"I see," said Ramsey. "Tho Johnnies
know they wero on the side of the
"I Wouldn't Care," Said tho Boy. "I'd
Bo In the Parade Anyway, If I Was
You."
devil." But nt this, the grandfather's
laugh was louder than It had been be
fore, and Ramsey looked hurt. "Well,
you can Inugh If you want to I" he
objected In an aggrlovcd voice. "Any
way, tho Sunday school sup'lntcndent
told us when pcoplo knew thoy wero
on the devil's sldo they always"
"I dare say, I daro say," the old man
Interrupted, a little Impatiently. "But
In this world mighty fow people think
they're on the devil's side, Ramsey.
The South thought tho devil wus on
our sldo, you sec."
"Well, that kind o' mixes It all up
more'n ever."
"Suppose you look nt It this way:
The South was lighting for what It
believed to bo Us right to be a coun
try by Itself; but we were fighting for
'Liberty and Union, now nnd forover,
ono nnd Inseparable.' There's tho rea
son wo had tho certain knowledge that
wo were going to win tho wnr. How
plain nnd slmplo It Is I"
Ramsey didn't think so. He had be
gun to feel bored by tho conversation,
and to undergo the oppression ho us
ually suffered in school. Tho earnest
old votco of tho veteran was only a
sound In the boy's cars.
"Boom" Tho veterans had begun
to Arc their cannon on the crest of tho
low hill, out nt tho cemetery; and from
a little way down the street como tho
rat-a-tat of a toy drum nnd sounds of
a fifo played execrably. A file of chil
dren In cocked hats modo of newspa
pers came marching Importantly up
tho sidewalk 'under tho maplo shudo
trees; and In advance, upon n veloci
pede, rode a tln-sworded personage,
shrieking Incessant commands but not
concerning himself with whether or
not any military obedlenco wns there
by obtained. Here was a revivifying
effect upon yountr Ramsey: his shier.
gard eyelids opened electrically; ho
leaped to his fcot ond, abandoning his
grandfather without profneo or apolo
gy, sped across tho lawn and out of
the gate, charging headlong upon tho
commander of the company.
"Yon get off that 'loclpede, Wesley
Bender V he bellowed. "You gimme
that sword I Whaf rights you got to go
inn Mintaln o' my army. I'd like tn
know I Who got up this nnJiy, in the
first, xjiace. ra hk iw "wi i uiu
Copyright by DouMedsy. Purs 6 Coenpsny f 5
myself, yestcrd'y afternoon, and yon
get back in lino or I won't let you
b'iong to it at nil I"
Tho pretender succumbed; he In'
stnntly dismounted, being out-shouted
and overawed. On foot he took his
place In tho ranks, whllo Ramsey be
camo sternly vociferous. "In-tentlon,
company I Farwud march I Col-lumn
right I RIght-showdler harms I Haiti
Far-wud march. Carry harms"
Tho army went trudging nway un
der tho continuous but unheeded fire
of orders, nnd presently disappeared
round a corner, leaving tho veteran
chuckling feebly under his walnut treo
and alone with the empty street. All
trace of what ha had said seemed to
have been wiped from tho grandson's
mind; but memory has curious ways.
Ramsey had understood not n fifth nor
n tenth of his grandfather's tnlk, nnd
nlrcndy ho had "forgotten" all of It
yet not only wero there many, many
times In flio boy's later life when,
without ascertainable cause, ho would
remember wordB nnd sentences spokcu
by the grandfather, though the lis
tener, half-drowslly, had heard but tho
sound of nn old, eornest voice nnd
even the veteran's meaning finally
took on n greater definlteness till It
became, In the grandson's thoughts,
something clear and bright and beauti
ful that he knew without being Just
sure where or how he had learned It.
CHAPTER II
Ramsey Milholland sat miserably In
school, his conscious being consisting
principally of a dull hnte. Torpor
was a llttlo dispersed during a fifteen
minute Interval of "Music," when he
and nil the other pupils In the largo
room of the "Five B. Grade" snug re
peatedly fractions of what they cnun
elated as "The Star Spun-guh-hullert
Banner"; but afterward he relapsed
Into the low spirits nnd animosity nat
ural to anybody during enforced con
finement under Instruction. No allevia
tion was accomplished by an Invnder's
temporary usurpation of the teacher's
platform, n brisk and unsympnthetlenl
ly cheerful young woman mounting
thereon to "tench German."
For n long time mathematics and
German had been about equally re
pulsive to Ramsey, who found himself
dally In tho compulsory presence of
both ; but ho wns gradually coining to
rcgurd German with the greater hor
ror, because, ufter months of patient
mental resistance, he at last began to
comprehend thnt the German langungo
has sixteen special and particular ways
of using the German article corre
sponding to thnt flexlhlo bit of a word
so easily managed In English the.
What In tho world wus the use of
linvlng sixteen ways of doing a thing
thnt could Just ns well be dono In one?
If tho Germans had contented them
.elves with Insisting upon sixteen use
less variations for Infrequent words,
such as hippopotamus, for Instance,
Rnmspy might have thought tho affair
unreasonable but-not necessarily vi
cious It would be easy enough to
avoid talking about a hippopotamus
If he ever had to go to Germany. But
tho fact that tho Germans picked out
n nnd tho nnd ninny other llttlo words
In uso nil the time, nnd gave every ono
of them sixteen forms, and expected
Ramsey Milholland to learn this dizzy
ing uselessness down to the last
crotchety detail, with "When to employ
Which" ns a nausea to prepare for tho
flnnl convulsion when one didn't uso
Which, becnuse It wns nn "Exception"
there was n fashion of making easy
matters hard that was merely hellish.
Tho teacher was strict but cnthu
slnstlc; she told the children, over and
over, thnt the German wns n beautiful
language, and her fnce always bad n
glow when sho said this. At such
times tho children looked patient ; they
supposed It must bo so, becnuso sho
was an adult and their teacher; and
they believed her with the snmo man
ner of believing which those of them
who wont to Sunday school used there
when tho Sunday school teachers were
pushed Into explanation of vorlons
mnttcrs set forth In the Old Testa
ment, or gavo reckless descriptions of
hoaven. Thnt Is to soy, tho children
did not challenge or deny; already
they had been driven Into hnblts of
resignation and wero passing out of
tho age when childhood Is nble to re
ject adult nonsense
Ramsey Milholland did not know
whether tho English Inngunge wns
beautiful or not; ho never thought
nbout It. Moreover, though his deeper
inwnrds hated "German," ho liked his
German teacher, ond It wns plensant
to look nt hor when that glow samo
upon her face.
"You bet your life I hato
her. 'Teacher's Pet that'a
what I calf her."
(TO BE CONTINUED.)
Limited Rule.
"Believe yourself happy and you arei
happy," says a writer. Unfortunately,)
that rolo doesn't work when n mani
thinks he is wise, for then he Is other
wise. Ono humble cottnge on enrth Is J
better than a dozen castles in the sir.
"Ufie
AMEPJCAN
LEOON
(Copy for Tula Department Supplied by
tho American l.Blnn New Service.)
WILL WRITE POST'S HISTORY
Rupert Hughes, Author, Will Chron
Icle Happenings to Members of
Robert Stowe Gill Body.
The history of one American Lcgloa
post will bo written by no less n light
than' Rupert
Hughes. With nn
eyo to his versn.
tllo p c n, mem
bers of tho Rob
ert Stbwe GUI
post of tho Le
gion in New
York, hnvo mado
tho author their
historian. T h o
membership of
the post Is mado
up entirely of
members of tho
Lamb's club writers nnd nctors for
the most part.
"Long In tlnio and short In Impor
tnnco" Is tho wny Mr. Hughes de
scribes his military career. As a mat
ter of fact ho wns a fairly important
soldier. He started us u private In
tho Seventh regiment In 1807. Ten
years Inter he wns offered n lieuten
ant colonelcy, which ho did not ac
cept. IIo served on tho Mexican bor
der ns n captain, and only denfness
kept him from service nbrond during
tho World war. During tho raising
of troops in New York ho served as
adjutant general, whero his deafness
was nu asset rather than a liability
with the pacifists tooting their tin
whistles, and then ho beenmo a cap
tain In the Intelligence service, being
lust ns Intelligent when denf ns when
sharp of hearing.
"I Joined tho L'eglon," Mr. Hughes
wrote, "becnuso I bcllovo In Its prin
ciples and I believe It to bo ono of the
most Important organizations in tho
country." Mr. Hughes has recently
como into public notice for his stand
against censorship.
HIGH ON LEGION HONOR ROLL
Minnesota Newspaper Man Wrote 3,
236 Personal Letters to "Home"
Workers During World War.
Ono of tho world's most enthusias
tic letter writers is M. W. Grimes, edi
tor of the Lo
Sueur (Minn,)
News. For his re
markable service
as "sclf-appolnt-e
d correspond
ent" during the
wnr, he stands
high on the hon
or roll of the
Minnesota d e
partment of the
Amorlcnn Legion.
I,e Sueur nnd
vicinity sent 230
man nnd seven women to tho colors.
Editor Grimes sat down nnd wroto
them 3,230 personul letters whllo they
wero nwny from home, an average of,
ono letter n month for each fighter or
nurse. In addition he mailed n -copy
of tho hometown paper to each of
them every week. Tho letters wero
not tho "Denr-JIm-I-remnln-yours-truly"
variety ; they contained tho bits
of "homo gossip" nnd local color for
which the doughboys wero willing to
give their Inst cigarette.
When the veterans returned, Editor
Grimes assisted In tho formation of a
post of tho American Legion nnd de
voted nn entire edition of the News
to reproducing tho pictures 'of every
Lo Sueur boy that had lost his life
In tho war.
AN EYE ON NEXT CONGRESS
Official Washington Is Speculating on
How Many Ex-Service Men Will
Be Returned.
OIHcla'l Washington Is wondering
how mnny ex-scrvlco men nro to bo
returned to congress nt the election
next fall. Speculation Is rife, with tho
bonus controversy nt full tilt.
Veterans of the World wnr already
havo formidable strength in tho house,
31 scats being occupied by former
service men, according to a canvass by
tho American Legion. Tho sennto has
two veterans Senntor Newberry of
Michigan, and Senator Elklns of West
Virginia. Twenty-ono stntes are rep
resented by cx-servlco men In con
gress, New York lending with four,
Massachusetts and Tennessee being
second wlh three each.
Far-sighted persons hnvo hazarded
the opinion that when the votes nro
counted In November, It will be found
thnt the number of ex-sol dlcrs In the
houso has been materially Increased.
Only Ex-Servlco Men Wanted.
When Edward Ilincs, millionaire
merchant of Chicago, wants help In his
lumber yards, ho sends to tho Amer
ican Legion. Ills employment olllcers
have been Instructed to. hlro only vet
erans of tho war In the yurds. nines
Is tho donor of n memorial hospital
at Maywood, III.
Single Track.
"When Is your flaughter thinking of
getting mnrrled?"
"Constantly." American Lcgloa
Weekly.
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LEGION MAN BUSY AVIATOR
Earl Vance, Miles City (Mont.) Ex.
Soldier, Did Not Quit When tho
War Ended.
Before the war, EnrI T. Vunco wns
a stenographer. IIo could scarcely
typewrite for GO
seconds without
mnklng n mistake,
but wlicu ho got
Into aviation he
mannged to fly
1,000 hours with
out nn accident.
Lemuel Bolles,
national adjutant
of tho American
Legion, was so
impressed with
this record that,
after turning
down dozens of offers to ride, he took
his first flight with Vance while tour
ing tho country In Montana. Vnnco
bad returned from his nlrplnno honey
moon, which ho devised ns a means
of avoiding old shoes nnd rice, and
which his bride thought wns "too
thrilling for words."
When Vance got out of the service,
ho found himself In Texas. Not be
ing entirely decided on tho best place
to live, be stepped into n plane and
Btarted "north." When he arrived over
Montana he looked down nnd thought
tho country looked good. So he land
ed, nnd he Is In Miles City, where lie
runs nn airplane company. Doctors,
and oven horse doctors, patronize his
taxi service to make their long calls
Montana miles being among the long
est In the world. Vance always makes
It a point to fly to conventions of the
American Legion.
"SERVICE" FOR LEGION ALSO
Raymond Brackett, of Marblehead,
Mass., "Delivered the Goods"
During the World War.
When Raymond O. Brackett was
running n hotel In Marblehead, Mass.,
ho believed In
giving his guests
"service." When
his patrons or
derea up nn oy
ster stew, they
were sure to find
plenty of oysters
In it.
When the wnr
began to be men
tioned In the pa
pers, Mr. Brack
ett, whose grand
father, uncle, and
great-uncle all had been In the army
In the Civil war, closed his desk, hung
up his "be back later" sign, and
Joined the navy. The Germans having
ordered up a war, Mr. Brackett, In his i
customnry style, saw to It that they
got "service." If war was what they
wanted, he was willing to fill their
order. On October 1, then a full
fledged lieutenant, he steamed out In
his U. S. S. Lake View and "filled the
North sea so full of mines that thero
was very little actual water left. It
was on the Lake View that he wit
nessed tho sinking of the German
fleet at Scapa Flow.
When Lieutenant Brackett returned
ho took down his sign, opened his
desk, nnd found a notice of his elec
tion as one of the national vice-corn-mnndcrs
of the American Legion, in
which capacity he Is still giving "serv
ice." USED FUG FOR DUST CLOTH
Tampa Legion Man Causes Investiga
tion When He Witnecscs Desecra
tion of Starry Banner.
" A man stood wiping off his auto
mobile. It was rapidly taking on a
glorious luster the sort of sheen that
Is spoken of In advertisements of fur
niture polish, but which Is seldom
seen. It was a lustre that brightened
tho very streets of Tampa, Fin., where
the automobile stood. It throw back
the rays of tho sun and mirrored the
figure of the tolling man.
Attracted by the light, a member
of the American Legion post nt Tampa
drew near tho scene, and finally mado
out that the man wns wiping the car
with a largo American flag. The stars
and stripes were being rubbed lnglorl
ously from the radiator cap to tho tali
light and back ngnln. It was such an
unusual ca,so that tho Legion man had
a special committee appointed.
After much deliberation, tho com
mlttco roported that tho offender wns
"simply Ignorant." Steps wore taken
Immediately to show tho naive auto
wlpcr why ho was using tho wrong
sort of dust cloth.
Carrying On With the
American Legion
Baseball Is In full swing with the
American Legion In Buenos Aires now.
Twenty-two squares of Qulncy,
Mass., have been dedicated by tho
American Legion to as many war dead,
King Victor Emmanuel favors the
plan of having 1,000 British nnd 1,000
American soldiers visit tho Italian bat
tle front next summer.
"Start them right" Is tho motto o
tho American Legion nt Colome, N. D.,
which has taken over the Instruction
of the local troop of boy scouts.
Borrowing American Legion buttons
to obtain sympathy In the courts has
been a practice of prisoners In tho Los
Angeles county jail. Tho judge Is
"wise" now.
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Hastings, Nebr. "During cxpcctnncy
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Lexington St.
Your health is most important to
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tion of Dr. Pierce's In tablet or liquid .
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When you nro constipat
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WiM.nH-h.COi, DKTPIOIT.
An Aftermath.
"Hello, sir; remembr- me?"
"Can't suy I do, sir."
"I met you at tho club ono dny."
"I'm a very poor hand at remem
bering faces."
"Why, tha wns the day I tipped
you off on the stock market."
"So? Come tojjet myself together,
your face does seem familiar I"
"After which I borrowed $10 from
you." ,
"Certainly. I remember you."
"And you. promised that when next
wo mot you'd lend me another ton."
"Pardon me, I wns mistaken In tho
face!" New York Sun.
Seeing Is Believing.
Gertrude "Well, nnywuy, Georges
dresses Hko a gentlcmnn." Clare
"Indeed I I nover snw him dressing."
Sure Relief
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HINDERCORNS Remorei Conn. Cal-'
Ioomj. tie., (top all pain, ruuraa comfort to Ilia
gilt, HIootTitialcal Work. Patchplug. H.Y., .
AVANTISU-IIOY OK U1KI. In every locality
to sell alx of our leather billfolds and enrn
dandy camera FlllCR. Write Indian.,
Leather Specialty Co., Crown l'olnt, InJlona.
fret, m&kra walklnr &jit. IAo. bv mall nr At nntn.
W. N. U., LINCOLN, NO. 13-1922.
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