"i' WWISBiWH .. CTftaji ill iMjiaJ;fcdr'"lV! I i'!rft-t- . Tor ,-' riT .ijr.' - - 2i ,.-i . SSNM2mM 3-i -.vr-tPw - 1 &Jtl - l-JS tx r Tfl BD CLOUD CfflET. THE BED CLOUD CHIEF. Chief. BATB8 OF ADVER7.1SLHG: PUBLISHED WEEKLY, On loch, firt inarrtira. ! nlonpnil tcrtKfs. . " thrr ranoa. . . x rapotti.. ..... . M twlio ruootin , . QoarUr column, thrt BxmUs.. . .,. !x vKmlh. .... !!' tao&l&a. Half column, thrt tamtttu , alsmalb , Iwelia roocCi.,., 0o colusin. thnw raoutha ........... M UmeaU .... u twtlteBontlk. .... . 0 &' i. M 1.00 yon ivoi XKX 30.m - J. pa M san ice.es AT RED CLOUD, Wsiator County, Use. . 4 .C x $2.00 PER ANNUM. Devoted to the Interests of Southwest Nebraska. G. L. MATHER. Publisher. Marruc axxl Ohlmarj- SMicw fr. .val nc- Itaea ICe rr Uar. Tru;e!it ao4 tat Ai!rrUa- yph,h. RED CLOUD, WEBSTER CO., HEB., THURSDAY, MARCH 26, 1874. NO. 39. i- "Two Dollars a Yoar, in Advance. mcct royM in 4xuc Yrl? aJrUa k r i. pajaUr quarterly. Ied fLOUD 1HE I r " I t I M. AUAHMIV:. nr Jxsnx t. riixix. Oboo in the leafy prim of Spring, TChen b1oirn whltrnul ex-ry thorn, I vaiiderrd through Oik Vale of Orb Where Aga'xiz born. "The bird Jn boyhood be bar! known Wait flitting through the (r of May, And happy eouga bo lovi-U to bear Made all lb, landscape say. I saw the elrearnlet frpm tbe biUa Ilun laughing through tbe vallrya gracs, And m I watched it rnn, I nald. " Tblii UU dear fyea baTO seen J" For c'.lffg of let- hi feet bad clirabel That day nutapoke of blrn to me ; JTbe, avalanche creraed to aound "' Tbe name of A gauiU 1 And. rtandJnsc on the mountain crag Where ioAetifd water rni-b mud foam, I felt, that trfongh on Cambridge aide, .. Ue.raa Id that pot toy borne. And looking round me as I inuned, I knew iir pang of foar. or care, Or boincflrk -weariufKK, becauao Onrc Aganli titood there ! I walked trf-math no alleu klet No foreign height I came to tread, Kor everywhere I looked, I tw Ilia urand. beloved bead. Hi fcuillo wub atamped on every tree, The glacier hboue to gild hia name, And every Image in the lake ' lleflectiil back hia fame. flreat keeper of the maple keya That could unlock I ho guarded gale. Wuere Science like a Monarch ittand, Ad Pacred Knowledge waits ' Thlun axhr rct ou Charle' bank, Thy memory all th world contain!, Kor thou conlilVt bind in humau love All heart iu golden chain! -Tblue was the heaven-born apcll that net a Oar warm aud dip affections free Who knew the bent remit hue thee bout, And tangent mourn for thee ! Srritnur't for March. SCARED OUT OF A WIFE. A IaUK!in!!e Story. Tlio imrrfttivo which I am about to "write, was told to me ono bleak, cold niht, iu a country parlor. It woa one of those nights in midwinter, when the wind Bwept over tbo Innd, makiug every 'thiug tuifelo with its frosty breath, thut 1 wuh seated beforo u blazing tire, wir rounded by a jolly, half dozen boys and an old bachelor a Peter Green about fortj and eight years old. It was juBt tho night without, to make thono within enjoy a good story, bo each of uh had to tell his favorite story, sttvo Mr. Green, and as ho was u jolly old fellow, wo all looked for a jolly story. Wo were somewhat sur prised to hear, him say, " I have no story, that would interest you," so wo had to find other entertainments for a time, when ono of tho boys told me to ask him how it happened he never got married. So I did. "Wellr gtotletoen," ho-began, "it doift seem right for mo to toll how that happened, but as it is about myself I don't care much. You sco, when I was youug, wo had to walk as high bb live miles to church and siugtug school, which was our chief enjoyment. But this don't have anything to do with my not getting a wife, bnt I just wanted to show you that we had soma trouble them days' in getting our sport. John Smith and 1 wero like brothers, or like "Mary and her little lamb." Whero onoweat the othtr was sure to go. So wBTvcnt to sco two sisters and as wo wero uat tho best boys imagina ble, tho old gentleman took umbrago and wouldn't allow us to como near tho house, so wo would take the girls to tho end of tho lane, and there wo would have to take ho final kiss. Wo -oon got tired of that sort of fun, und I told Johnson our way to singing school ouo night, that I was going to tako Saddie home, and that I was going int j tho houso, too. Ho said the old mau would run mc if I did. 1 told him I was going to risk it any how, lctxxue what would. lie said "he would risk it if I would." So homo wo went with the girls. When wo got to tho end of tho lane, I told tho girls wo proposed going all the way. Thcr;looked at each other in a way I didu'tKke too well, but they said the old folks wowISbe in bed, eo they didn't caro if wo did. They wero a little more surprised yet wlien I told them we thought of going(in a little while, but as all was quioti.whea.wo got to tho house.we had no trouble in getting iuto tho kitchen. Then and there we had our first court, and I made up my mind to ask Sadie tc ba mr.'wifo the next time I came. It was now past the turn of the night, and as wo had lour miles to walk, I told John wo would have to be going. So we stepped out on the porch, but iust as we did eo, tbo sky was lit up bv lightning, and ono tremendous thunder peal rolled along tbe mountain sides. It echo had not died out in the far off vales until the -rain btgaa toto pour from the garnered fulluess of the clouds. Wo waited for it to 6top until we were all sleepy, when tho girls said we should go to bed iu the little room at the head of thestairswhich ledontof the kitchen, as their; .father didn't get up fatly we coald'behome before the old folks were ast'r. So after bidding the girls a sweet good night and hugging them a little and .wishing them pleasant dreams, and promising them to come back on next, Saturday night, we staited for bed. i ?' . si Wo didn't have far to go, as the bed stood near the Lead of the stairs. John was soon in be3,"Tut as I was always a little slow, and full of curiosity, I was looking around the little room. At last I thought I would sit down on a chest which was spread over with a nioe, white Tloth,- -while I drew off my boots. Sotrwn 'P sat? when, stars of the east, I went plump into a big egg custard pie I I thought John would die laughing, for he said I had smashed that custard all tortlwaHisr, j&ad thepfata Tight in two. c " You see we had to be awful quiet, to that the aUrMa;Wulino4 &eac. I was now ready to get ihlo bed, so 1 put the light out aud picked up tax bcot 'poking, to put them in a more j convenient plaoe wlun down my oce leg w nt throsgh a pipe hole, which had been covered with paper, up to my hip. Jfow one.part qf nie- watVap stairs, while the longest part was in tho Kitchen. As my leg was very loni shelf which was occupiei it reached a with dishes, pans, coffee-pots, etc., and turning it over down it went with a tremendous crash. The girls hod not yet retired, and I could hear them laugh fit to split their sides. I felt awfully ashamed, and was scared until my heart was in my throat, for I expected the old man every mo ment. I extracted my leg from the con founded hole just in time, for the old lady looked into tho kitchen from the room door, and asked what all that noiso was about ? Tho girls put her off as best they could, and I went to bed, while John was strangling himself under the covers to keep from laughing aloud. , Wo soon went off into the land of dreams with tho hope of waking early. I wish I could tell you my dreams, but it would take mo too long. One mo ment I would fancy mysely by the side of Sadie, sipping nectar from her heaven-bedewed lips, and the next I would bo flying from tho old man, while he would be flourishing his cane above my head. This all came to an end by John giving me a kick. On waking up and looking around I saw John's eyes as big as my fist, whilo the sun was beaming in at the window. What to do now we couldn't tell, for wo heard the old man having family prayers in tho kitchen. John looked out of th- window and said wo could get down over the jwrch roof. " Get out and dress Bible," ho said. as soon as poB- So in my hurry my foot got fastened in tho bedclothes, and out I tumbled, headformost, turned over, and down tho steps until I struck the door, which was fastened by a wooden button, and giving way, out I rolled right in fiont of the old man. Ho threw up both hands and cried, "Lord have mercy on us !" for he evi dently thought I was tho devil. Tho old lady screamed until you could havo heard her a mile. I was so scared and bewildered that I couldn't get up at once. It wajtwarm weather, and I didn't have anything on but a shirt. When I heard the irirls snickerincr it made mo mad, and I jumped up and rushed out of the door, leaving the greater part of my shirt on tho old iron door latch. Off I started for the barn, and when half way through the yard tho dog sot up a howl and went for me. JWhea I got to" tho barnyard I "had to 1 run through a flock of sheep, and among them an old ram, who backed off a little and started for me. With ono bound I escaped his blow, sprang into tho barn, and began to climb up tho logs into tho mow, when an old mother hen pounced upon my legs, picking mc until they bled. I throw myself upon tho hay, and after John had slid down tho porch into a hogshead of rainwater, he camo to -mo with ono of my boots, my coat, and one of the legs of my pants. Ho found me completely prostrated. Part of my shirt, my hat, one leg of my pants, my vest, stockings, necktie, and' one boot was left behind. I vowed then and ihero that I would never go to see another girl, and I'll die before I will. MR. COHLEIUH'S MISERY. Mr. Cobleigh says that wlien ho was married ho weiched 140 pounds, aud a fourteen-inch band was very comfort ablo on his shirt. But now that he weighs 180 pounds it naturally follows that tho collar bad should be propor tionately increased in Bizo; but his wife totally disregards this equitable conclusion and persists in making four-tcen-inch bands to his new shirts. In consequence, Mr. Cobleigh experiences much distress in getting tho band but toned, and very frequently i .obliged to call in his wifo to help him, which that admirable woman never fails to do by buttoning the skin of his threat in' with tho button. Tho fact that these bands are only fourteen inches when they should bo fifteen is a source of auother, aud, if anything, much greater aggravation than bringing1 these ends together. The band sits so close to his neck t at it not only endangers his life iv suaiungra ms uream, but renders the attachm nt of a collar an alisost hopeless undertaking in that it leaves no spaco to insert a guiding and sustaining, finger. Iiat Sunday morn ing Mr. Cobleigli though ' he had reached the culminating point in his domestic misery, Mrs. Cobleigh was out in the kitchon attending to the finishing touches of her Sunday morn ing dutius, and Mr. Cobleigh was sit ting up in bed trying to button his shirt at the neck. He had Mb neck stretched to its utmost tension with a view to re ducing its circumference as much as possible ; his head was thrown beck, and his face which was red and mottled, was twisted into a grimace expressive of the most pregnant sufferings. Jn this condition he was making herculean ef forts to encompass his object, asd was failing most signally. Anyone eimply studying his face without catching as much as a glixnpso of his fingers could' accurately measure his successes. Thcre was first the look of suppressed interest as he brought the two points- together without having either slip which grad ually merged.-into one-ef hysterical doabt as the hole partly slipped over the button and this succeeded in turn by an expression of quivering expecta tion as but one move more remained to accomplish complete success. Every nerve m his body tingled at this point, every musde was stretched to its-greatest tension. He gave the last pressure -rthe eyelet quivered an instant then heat ited then supped, and botli em suddenly dropped apart, and with Hg&V mug rapidity the features of Mr. Cob leigh becams oonvmlsed with passion, while his ungovernable screams re sounded through the ho-ase. Mrs. Cob leigh, like a faithfHl wife, was oa kad at ouc?, and was somewhat horriSed at the spectacle of the fosming Cobleurh sitting bolt upright in bed, -md glaring like a maniac at tho footboard. She came to his rescue at once, brought the ends around his swelling throat, nipped up the flesh to a degree that made him howl, and succeeded finally in not only getting the button iato the hole, but also a good half-inch of skin with it. She them threw him .a collar .and whisked out of the room again. It very soon transpired that Mr. Cob leigh's troubles were only just com menced. He looked at the collar mood ily for a moment or two and then picked it up and essayed to put it on. The masculine reader is already aware that an infamous mode of making hirt "but tons, lately introduced, is without any shoulder at all. It was hard enough in, all conscience tcfHstea'-a paper collar with the old-fashioned button to cling to, but now no man with a spark of emotion in his composition can possibly hitch to tho pearl wafers in use without becoming visibly and most unpleasantly affected by the operation. Mr. Cob leigh has several sparks of emotion in his nature Mrs. Cobleigh says he is a bunch of them. Ab thero was no possi bility of getting a finger under the band at the back he could use but one hand, and he applied that with com mendable indue try. His head was bent way forward now, and his eyes pro truded to such a degree that the tears which were forced from them dropped clear of his cheeks. He could almost bear his spine crack from the pressure he was subjected to, and his a mm at the shoulders appeared to be his worst enemies. Ever and anon a cry of mingled rage and disappointment was wrungfrom him, supplemented by an explosive plirase which it is not neces sary to print. It was on tho explosion of one of these phrases that Mrs. Cob leigh again took the alarm, and came beaming in to learn the trouble. With the instinct of affection, she started to his relief, but her irate husband no sooner saw her, than' he flow into an unaccountable passion, and declared with much heat that "when ho wanted her he'd send for her, and ho'd put on that collar himself or he'd bust every shirt in the house." And ho went at it with renewed energy, and every timejie thought he had it his thumb would slip by or over the top, and every time his thumb aliped he would slap it under his other arm, and draw up his body in tho greatest pain, and grind out from be tween his clenched teeth what the af frighted lady understood to be, " Gaw-r-r-r-r- doh-r-r-r r it." Suddenly and most unoxnectedlv. tho back wafer took hold, but not until he had seggested to I ins wiie that here alter she had better sew the button on tho inside of tho bund aud put a patch over it, and then perhaps ho could get his collar on with in a fortnight. But his success ended here. In vain he plied his blistered and aching thumb to the button in front ; in vain ho Hpread out bis legs and drew them up again and ground his teeth ; in vain ho pranced around, and smote his fists, and chewed his tongue the ends would not fasten ; and finally becoming exhausted, and puffing liko a porpoise, ho torq the collar from its fastening, and grinding it beneath his heel, sworo most vehemently that no woman would put a collar on him without first passing over his dead body. Upon that he strode moodily iuto the garret, whilo Mrs. Cobleigh with au aching heart, and feeling unfitted for worship, seated herself at tho front window and looked through the blinds at the neighbors going to church. Danbury Jfcws. Brilliant gncces. It is permitted to few men or com panies to achieve acknowledged suberi- ority in any important position or busi ness. The present generation has wit nessed stupendous rivalry in several branches of industry, and notably tho Sewing Machine business. Amid a multitudo of .competitors, steadily and surely the Wheeler & Wilson Company held their way from the beginning, upon fixed and honorable principles. Long since, their leading position in America was established. Abroad, at London, jn 18G2. thev won the highest nrpn.i- lims ; at Paris, in 1867, they distanced eighty-two competitors, and were award ed the highest premium, the only Gold Medal for Snwincr AfarOn-mc arliHiifnl . and lastly, amid unparalleled competi tion, followed the splendid triumphs at Vienna, noted in our -advertising col umns. lire. According to Pliny, fire was a long time unknown to some of tho ancient Egyptians, and when a celebrated as tronomer showed it to them, thoy were absolutely in raptures. The Persians, Phoenicians Greeks, and -several other nations, acknowledged that their ances tors were once without the use of fire, and the Chinese confess the same of their progenitors. Pompanion, Mola, Plutarch and other ancient writers speak of nations which, at the time when they wrote, knew not .the mse of. fire, or had just learned it. Facts of the same kind are also attested by modern nations. The inhabitants of the Marian Islands, which were discovered in 1551, had eo MeiH of fire. Never was astonishment greater than theirs when they saw it on the desert in one of their islands. At first they belieTed it was some kind of animal that fixed to and fed upon wood. Fiskj stery Abeat Meeree. The " Monroe doctrine "-will hare aa other meaning it a story told by a cor respondent of the Fredericksburg Star coBcernfng; President 'Monroe, is true! After leaving the White Honse, Mr. Monroe resided in New York. Here he became embarrassed and went back to his fans Bear CriarlottesviUe. About a year after a 3few Yk creditor sent to James W. Saunders, lawyer, a claim of $400 to collect, Saanders was well re ceived by the ex-President, breakfasted with hia. and had a deUghUsl tme u til he politely broached the sabiect of. the $400. Mr. Moaroe quietly batesed to the reqaeet for pavateat, west to a drawer, took cat, aot the asoaer, bat two pietola, aad rated Mb Saasden to a grove near the koase. The lawyer owwraea, mmarmcmto saul he would prefer battle to having his peace .of asicd destroyed by hungry creditors. FARM, H0USfc0MrAXT KITCHEN. F4iJtaUCT. The English end Continental fanners know tho value, f bono dust, and the Americans will Mon.find it out. Mr. M. Xj. Suuovaxt, the great Illi nois farmer, of Livingston county, has contracted for th erection of fifty tene ment houses on his faun at Gibson. Or guano, as a permanent fertilizer, there is some dovtt ; bnt as a stimulant of growing cropaytrn good soil, it is in valuable, either o grass or arable lands. Soot is u moat trainable manure, eith er for grass or fortternips, ae it quickly loroes eue plan; from ccsmits wtbe Ay -TftW JllnfiT excellent for -dest ing the grub m onion beds. A GimrDSTONZ should not be exposed to tho weather, as it not only injures the wood-work, but tho sun's rays harden the stone and render it useless. Neither should it tttand in tho water in which it runs, as tho part remaining in water softens no much that it wears unequally. An Ohio farmer sneeets that the granges set themselves about introduc ing the English sparrow for the protec tion of fruit-growers. Tho sparrows breed fast and eat a good deal. A pair of sparrows having a family to bring up will consume over three thousand cater pillars a week. A man in Woodbury, N. Y., raised and marketed from five-eighths of an aero on hiB farm, egg-plants which sold for $199.15; radishes which sold for $78 making a total of $577.15 caih iu hand. Besides this his family was sup plied and some given away. There were 1,829 hills of the egg-plants, 3$ by 4 feet apart. Pr-oriiE who, at husking time, have barked their sore fingers and broken their worn nails in the effort to make spaco to start a shovel in a wagon load of ears which they desiro to transfer to the crib, can thank The Journal of (he Farm for this suggestion of a better way : " In loading corn tako to the field a pieco of pine board six feet long and a little wider than your shovel; place an end on tho tailboard close to ono corner of tho wagon and the other on the bottom end: fill ur as usual. In unloading, shovel down the board to the bottom of tho wagon, and not an ear need be touched by the hands." To ,..,,. o , ., !. .!,. -. . ..wUVf W..UW common suture neeuic, a larco sewintr needlo will do, but if slightlv . h crooKcd at tho point, better ; thread it with a double cord, each one containing three threads of fine saddler's thread well twisted and waxed. Pass tho needle through the center of the wart close to tho skin, drawing the thiead half way through. Cut the cord next to the nee dlo, and tio each half separately with a surgeon's or other , secure knot, as tightly as possible, Cnt the ends off close to tho knot, and the wart will soon, disappear. If the wart is small at tho base, the cord may bo tJed around it as close to tho base as possible, aud the same end will be accomplished. It is a mistake in wheat culture to sow inferior seed. Indeed this is very foolish in regard to any and every crop. Like begets liko. Weakness and dis eate are propagated in the plant world very much as thoy aro tranHiuittcd from parent to child in tho world of human beings. The greater pains should bo taken to procure tho choicest seed that can possibly be had. It will pay tho farmer who depends upon his own growing of seed, to cut out tho best por tions of a field, when there is a per ceptible differeuce, and devote them to this important use. Indeed, it is a wise ' ! a a 4 . , . t policy to select tho earliest and finest heads, and from those grow seed. It is also well to obtain a chauge of need from time to time, as successive sowing in the same Boil and cliraato seems to induce more or less degeneracy. The farmer should never grudge a littlo ex tra outlay in tho purchase of choice seed. Such outlay is pretty certain to be well rewarded. HOimKUOLD Bt7tttiR8T10Xg. Keboseneis tho best article over dis covered to cleanse rust from grates and fire irons. To Purify Cider. A few slices of tho red beet, put into a barrel of musty cider, will deprive it of its disagreeable taste and smell, as well as prevent it from becoming vapid or acrid. Purpiji Ink. Take one snd one-half ounces gronnd logwood, ono-half ounce pulverized alum in one and one-half pint of soft water. This will make a very fancy ink. Frosted Feet. They may be cured as follows: White oak bark, taken Jresh and boiled in water for a strong nquor. .Dame me leet in the liquor. It is pronounced the be6t of all reme dies. A hot lemonade is one of the best remedies in the world for a cold. It acts promptly and effectively, and has no unpleasant after effects. One lemon properly squeezed, cut in slices, put with sugar, and covered with a half pint of boiling water. Drink just before go ing to bed, and do not expose yoarself on the following day. This remedy will ward off an attack of the chills and f ever if used promptly. Creosote toe Wabts. Dr. Haiaey, of St. Thomas' Hospital, London, has written an article for theaficef, detail ing the effects of creosote applied to warts. He applied it freely in an ob stinate, warty excrescence on the finger, then covered it over with a piece of sticking plaster. This course he par sned every three days for two weeks, when the wart was found to have disap peared, leaving the part beseatk it quite AUaarcx, Soap. Tbe foUowiar is commended by those who have tried it for scrnbbiag and rlranias; pMP4d floors, washing dishes, aad other koaae hold purposes: Take two poaads'of white olive soap aad share ft ia thia slices ; add two ouacea of borax and two quarts of cold water ; stir all to gether im a stone or eartaera jar, aad let set apoa the back of aha store an til the mass be dissolved. AvarylitUe. heat is required, as the liqaid seed aot simmer. When thorrjugliry' arixed aad cookd, .It becoBBea oMae eeasuteacv of atiiick jelly, and a piece the sue of a lather for a gal- KITCIIKX KKCIPKS. Giui'E Jam. Boil the grapes in just water enough to mako them tender, strain them through a colander, then in ono pound of pulp put one pound of sugar ; boil this half au hour ; the com mon wild jf rapo makes a nice jam. 'Wine Whey. Boil a pint of milk, and put to it a glass of white wino ; set it over the fire till the curd has settled, when strain it and sweoten to your taste. PiiAiN DooGHNCTK. One pint of rich .Bnermuic, one neapuitr teaspoomui oi . vi &juviurce uiDiespooniw-B os meiiea iara, nour to knead well. Pickled Onions. Peel off the outer skin of small onions, boil them until clear or half cooked, in salt water, and throw them whilo smoking hot into a jar of cold vinegar, spiced. OATMEAIi GRUEIi. Mix spoonful of fine oatmeal a or dessert patent groats with two tablesjwonfnis of cold water and boil for ten injnntes, stirring frequently. For a richer gruel, boil two tablespoon fills of groats in a quart of water for an hour. Strain through a sieve ; stir in a piece of butter large as a walnut and some sugar, nutmeg or ginger. Frizzled Beef. Into a pan put slices of dried beef, with iust enough boiling water to cover them. Let them cook ten minutes aud drain off the water. 11 not fine enough, cut smaller. Return to tho pan with a lump of but ter the size of a walnut, and a little pep per. To a quarter of a pound of beef allow two eggs, beat well together, and when the beef is hot, stir in. Cook about threo minutes, and send to table hot. How to PnErAKE Coffee. French cooks say good coffee cannot bo made by boiling; it must be leached ; tho aroma and flavor of the coffee goes off in the steam if it is boiled. Tho ground coffee must bo put in a vessel that is liko a fine sievo in tho bottom, pour boiling water on this, and & Boon as it passes through it is fit for use and if not I U81 immediately should bo placed ! where it will simply keep hot and not boiI'. w give this French method of maiang goou couee not lor tue oenent of hvgienists, for they will not use cof- ' tan. but in tlinnn who ntill (Wl rrinf. f linv i j. A.. x. ,1 J must take coffee, we would say, if you must nave it, mane u in mo nest way. Journal of. Health. Chanpioa Wrestllng-Match. Tho San Francisco papers give full accounts of the wrestling-match between McLaughlin, of Detroit, and Whalen, of California, for $4,000 and tho championship, which was recently contested in tho Golden City in the presenco of an immenso and excited audience. The Call says : Tho rival athletes have met, and Cali fornia's champion went down beforo the superior prowess of the man from the East, or, as he is facetiously termed, "Tho Foreigner." The agreement set forth that the match was to bo for $2,000 a side, collar and elbow grips, falls best two iu three, the contestants to wear short coats, light costume, and canvas shoes. The men wero then introduced, and the dis parity iu sizo became at onco apparent. AIcLanglriin looked a very giant in his whito tights, beneath which tho mus cles plavcd at every movement. Be side the gigantic frame of " Tho For oigner" "Corduroy's" form seemed al Alii At A. i .11 . . mi most liko that of a tall, slim boy. The two men were greeted with terrific shouts, which were continued for some ' time. I Tho noise having subsided, the men stepped forward, and after tho pre-. liminary hand-shaking the grip was ' taken, and the struggle commenced at ' precisely 9 o'clock. Whalen evidently ' perceived the great advantage of weight possessed by his opponent, and stood upon the defensive, endeavoring to , draw out "The Foreigner's" tactics. The latter pressed "Corduroy" with ap- parently too great display and surplus J movement, making frequent feints that seemed entirely unnecessary. Whalen remained perfectly cool, and it J teemed as though the contest would i become protracted, when, quick as a ) flash, McLaughlin lifted Whaien clear off the floor aad threw him fair upon his back at the rear of the stage, and then, without changing his hold, lifted the fallen "Corduroy" upoa hia feet with but little effort. The fall was from right to left, perfectly clear and fair, and accomplished in four minutes and a half. I At 9:12 o'clock the men again stood ' breast to breast upon the boards. Both men maneuvered for some time. Mc-' T.awtftiltn foiniinc wil. U Cl.. -.,,1 left Whalen had changed his tactics somewhat, and, while rrnnining on the defensive, dragged hie opponent over the floor, watching every opportunity to arrive at tbe right moment. Finding that "CrdtuoyseeaaeddeterBiiBed to draw him toward the sides of the stage, McLaughlin drove aim clear back to the reporters' tables, and by mere main force threw him apon them. Cries of ' Foul, foal," rang oat froai every por tioa of the hones, and a storm of hisses washarled at the seaming "Foreigner," whose undent object in throwiag " Cor darcy among the itemizers waa to worry him and render him leas cooL Saddenly, and before the aadieace had a single warning. Whales was again apon his back, in almost the same place as before, hariag teem throw by exactly the same process of lifting by maia atreagth and throwing square aad fair. Aroaxw Jacxxov wasoBce amking a stump speech ia a eoratry village oat WeaT. Just M vaB coacladiag, Amos Jaendall, who sat beside hia, whispered : " Tip 'em a little Lama, Geaeral ; they won't be satiated with ontit" Tke"kroof New Orieaaa" iaataatly thomgat of a few phrases he ksew. aid, ia a Teioeof taaader, wnaal ap hie speech by erriaiaMat; : i'Eplari bws aaam, Siae qaa bob, Ne alas altra, mauamin rarro.' xae eawet wi meodoaa, aad the stoats eoald be for miles. cubic inch will make a Ion of water. AU Sort. The Grangers number 751,125. Berlin rejoices in ono street railway. Tiiere are 61.000 peoplo iu Rich mond. " Whatever is, is right." If it isn't, we'll make it so. The dentists are pulhug through the hard times remarkably well. Dio Lewis says that high living is the foundation of every cemetery. Neari.t every pound of butter used in Florida is shipped from Ohio. jfoi" coat of tlie JDoadoHiUBdergroaiid railway was 1,000,000 per mile. "Hat fever" is what Memlwrs of Congress call tho Granger rago. There are 655 Good Templar lodges in Wales, with G0.000 memlwrs. A man at West Wheeling, Ya., made no Kegs oi eight-penny nails in a week. Harper' Matnzinc is offered "100 articles a woek. Less than ten aro ac cepted. Six-venny, telegrams aro to bo intro duced in England, and half-penny letter postage. In less than a century tho whole ara ble land of tho United States will bo ta ken up by actual settlers. The Athens (Tenn.) W thinks that Andrew Johnson will bo the next Con gressman from that district. A French novelist has ono of his characters bored through with an auger in the hands of an American. In Nanles a barber will hIiuv.v ?ni hair, comb, brush, black boot, and giv you a cigar aud call it square for ten cents. According to recent returns, the total amount invested in English rail ways is 329,090,000, or about $1,6-10,-000,000. Only one man has over dared to climb tho spire of St Paul's Church, London, though 20 is offered to unv one who will repaint the bolt "NArKiNS, sir! napkins .'" roared a Green Bay landlord; " no, sir, mo haven't got any; but if you want to wipe your noso I'll lend you my handker chief." Durino tho impending famino in In dia tho Government will bo called upon to supply half a pound of graiu per day, for eight months, to 25,000,000 people. Sam Foster, of Washington countv, N. Y., threshed, by hand, ninety bush els of oats in thirteen hours. Sam should get out a patent for himeelf im mediately. On tho occasion of tho one hundredth anniversary birthday of Mozart, recent ly, it was proposed to decorate his grave, but noxouo was ablo to point out tho final resting place of tho immortal composer. Op the 2.059 convicts HPntnrii1 In Ihn Maine State Prison during its fifty years of existence, there has been but one clergyman, and, so far ns is known, but ono person who was a member of a Christian church. The French Government has decided that tho Chinei-o Museum at Fontaine blcau and the collection of arms and armor at Picrreford belonged to the private estate of Napoleon III., and must thereforo be paid for by France. Corn meal, heated and placed in bags, is recommended as a Mibatiluto for hot water Iwttlca and Biich liko ap pjiances, for restoring warmth to the sick. It, is said to weigh loss, retain heat longer, and does not chill when cold. The enormous profits of street rail roads in some cities is shown by tho re Sirt of tho Third Avenue railroad in ew York. Its receipts last year were $2,140,246 ; expenses, $1,214,132. leav ing a handsome dividend of $926,694 on $2,000,000 of stock. In England, street railroads aru com monly known as tramways. The word " tram" is said to le an abbreviation of "Ontram," tho father of Sir James Outram, renowned for his military ex ploits in India, having Iveen the inventor of trams and tramways. The question of regulating railway rates and management by law is now pending in tho "Legislatures of Minne sota, Wisconsin, Iowa, Missouri and Kansas. The question is rapidly as suming a national importance and will hardly be settled r hort of the highest judicial decision. Thtbtt-seven of the seventy-two Sen ators in Washington aro accompanied by their wires, and nineteen have their daaghters with them. Of the 298 representatives and Delegates, 129 have their wives with them, and many of the others are accompanied by daghters and lady friends. A Kevel Theater. A visitor of the Chinese theater, in San Francisco, does not seem to be particubulr charmed by the Mongolian drama. He says: "Battle scenes are stock ingredient of the Chinese drama, and are eosducted oa a principle total ly at variaace with all oar modern ideas of warfare. It is no uncoauaoa feat for the hero to dismiss his army, aad, single-handed, conqaer the enemy, merely using his soldiers as a parsniag force. Tbe stage, which is limited, ia that the orchestra occupy nearly the whole of it, is merely a platfonaflanked by the walls of the hoase, lit up by some foar or five footlights and two attesnated gas-pipes pendant on either aide of the hoase, which terminate in numerous gas jets far more aeerai than oraameatal. Ia tbe rear a aerees, festooaed, with eaeara, amor laaaieal iaatrameata, aad .dmbolieal characters, serves as a sarti tioa to veil the drreaing run am aad greem room from the eye of the casual observer, aad two cwTtaiaed doors are the meaaa of exft aad easraaee. It has aever bees oar mfifmlan to hear the overtare, if one be played, hat jadgiag by the deaeriptrre mean, aadnsgiag dariag the progress of the play, which woamsreaaexcelieat for waaderiag miaearel eats, aothxagaaa been lost" tiik uiioyr that Ji.n maw. (JCtiiMU iW Jutb'vtiy, 17?.) ly, to tint JJ the ea(finrr Obcwtji alnt IhlDff . r a. to far, Sptrit Jont fool llh lorrra ranch. Anil lhrot!lTlir tlnal like la nch ; Anil a tor Jlai What hapimrl to htm Waa ot-balr fact aat Ut other half whttn I Runniojt ou night ou tho line, b taw J A hou a pU!B a tho tanral law J uit bj tho UHMbUt lii. and thctx Cam a tlrutiarn matt with himMrMtx' Than to itroi iu the rail. Flat aa a tU, Aa Jim dro by with the wMnUht mail. Down nit tb patent. Htram r"vmd. Too Ut ! for thee cam a tun J." Jlni carafel, A hi nrvman. thrln the cab with Utm, KluJcr itarrtl iu ib Uc i Jim. AUilaaia. "Wliat Mtrwl' .. Haya Jim, " What 'mrw I Vre Juat rna oiar a man that's ba l" -v- Th Drinu atarwl at Jim. They ran Rack, but thy nvr fonnl hvma nor man Nary a rhatlow within a mil. J tin turartl !, but h trtM to mil Thu on he iur. Tti milra nr tuor, lu taulcarr tlm. than hM rufel afut. Would )uu 1Ut It !-lhe rrry nil blht lp roan that huu lU tha jnooulltfht whit; Out cornea tbe chap and drnj aa btor. iKiwn gora the Uraiiw, and th tt aUiOr And . In fart, I ju-h nitht that ac tvxurrrd, till folW wvr Jim crackrrf. Humph! Let tna; ll'n a year now, tuc-t. That I mt Jim, Kat, anil 1.1. " How't your ghoitf "Oou,,ay Jlw; "aud tnor, tfa plain That ghoat tlont trutiU tu again ; I tbtu,fht I rhuok That shot whm 1 took A tUfe ou au Eaalvru Uue hut kik : What ahould I rurct th flrt trip out. Hut that Terr botiwi that wa talksd about, Aud that !f.asii man Wrll," uti I, I u lt' tltn to ttoji thia cr fuollahut,' Ho I crammed on taui. When there cam a evrrani From my Arrtnan attd that brok my dream " You've killed aomebody J" Keya I, " Not much ; l' bocu tbar often and I bar alnt u audi, Aud now III prove It." luck we ran. Aud darn my kln tut thar uu a man Ou the rail, di4d, ttmaabed In th head Now I call that meaner I" That all Jim Jt. Ilrtt llartt, (n fA .Vcie 1'ert Tim.. Humor. Exrr.NHivi: furniture Indian Hit. renuK. Ct'itK for n felon Tako It to tho jwni teutiary. A criminal court Sparking another man's wifo. Lazy husbnndo aro known out Wt as stovo watchers. Why ix a coachman like tho cloud ? Because he holds tho reiiiH. Rkal. chuck of kidnapping When the baby is " cribbed " at night, MAimuon is described by n French cynic as a tiresome book with a very fine preface. James says his grocer, having been converted, lias forsaken the errors of his weigliH. Ir n mini overrate, his uleep will be disturbed by tho nightmare another name for provisions. Lkt your motto be, " Liberty or Death, " aud if it conic to the pinch tuko tho most iu liberty. " I hat," said a rough fellow to a fop with conspicuous bow-Iegs "I nay, don't you havo to hnvo your pithtaloons cut with a circular saw V" Onb who kiioun how it is herself says, "The man who is awfully urbane Hi hit wifo beforo strangers, is generally also her banc behind their bocks." Now i8 the time for tree sgent. Look carefully at their lino picture of fruit. It looks tempting, but Ihj careful you aro not charmed by tho gnudy paint." C.VMroiiNiA agriculturist nro going largely into ginger. They haven't got much beyond the first syllable yrt, but hopo to do so when their plants germi nate. " What is Heaven's bst gift to aau ?" asked a young lady on Kssex street, Sunday night, smiling sweetly on u pleasant looking clerk. " A how, re plied the young man, with great prud ence. Danbury JVeu.'. A Nevada paper says: "The many friends of Hill ThomiMon will regret to hear that he was hashed nj by a cata mount to-day, on Nixon's Hill, r while ly ing in wait to choot a Chinaman. This was always a world of disapjtointment." A max in Iowa by the name of Silas Chew was married the other -day to a girl named Anna Good. The most ob tase person would instantly call to mind the Scriptural injunction, "Jj. Chew tliat which in evil, cleaving only to that which is Good." "Mas. HorxiKH, why don't ym sprin kle ashes on your icy sidewalk likaOf rr. Bedun, your opposite neighbor, for tlm lienefit of passers-by, aad so imitate the Good Samaritan?" "Let the pawuirs by imitate the Priest and Lente, aad pass by on tho other side." A yodsq lady who entered a Broad way music store, and asked the young maa in attendaace, " Have you Happy Dreams 7" was astonished whs he re plied, "No, ma'am, I'm mostly troubled with the rightmare' He dida't kaew why she went out so hurriedly ami slammed the store door af Usr her. 5eMc Ceaiart ef aag. Among the vessels which weat ashore dariag the Aagast galea oa the Nova Scotia coast was the schooner J. C. Smith, of Wellfleet, which went on near Mr. Madeasoiaelie. Soos after she struck several of the crew swung ashore on the staysail halliard. Foar were drowsed. One young au washed overboard, aad while vainly straggling in the aarf was seen by a large New fowadmad dog, which wasat the too of the bias fairy fiftees feet above the water. Ia aa mat sat he alamged over tbe preetpice aad ia almost aa little time as it takes to telk waa oatsmaag ?be rocks aad aadettew; He diaap peered freas sight far Mitm al akiamtea, aad when aext aeea had goatea km keaV partly over a roek, luakamde, aad while almoet strangled himeilf, waa dtaggiag forth with iainmilahle grip tbe orwasag yeas, nt aaramaja ' Both hoy aad doc a akhoajrfj- aeariy eakaaattlwl they reached the than. . j Craaxsa is ia. aarmoay wh the age. He is 74. -'-- ei J n v te ,4 e - 2. A . M .j. - . aa