GiSSCIS CK203 JSvyfiMS &TB2ESa iS2j &Ci kt&ii $5ic6 & A .Tfcli aekcisS ci& Sbreigii ami- -AxtaicbJ. W atokjQ Looses Gold WatcW ini Cteasj tc&A
(braid aad JfiateO. &rIVs, i:i3,
m fT m TT n n i t rk
THE HERALD.
Ilibllsbed eTery Thursday at
P4i.TTSMOLrTU, --XEIIRASKA.
ADVLltTISIVfj ilATKM
ln nqujirc, (10 line or lew) one JnSortt'Hi . .f 1
l.M'.U subv-qiicrt Insertion., W
Professional card, not exceeding alx HnelU
Hcoluiiui tcr annum So.ot
column per annum ..." 40.0t
H column do .' .::..... So 0
One cliiitin do ...loo.ol
All ndvcrtrlnjr Mil due quarterly. .
Transient adTCrtisehrenU mii.tt bepull(&
advuncc.
OWo-Oa Mailt St., Bt.;4lH and 6th.
Sjcond Story.
OFFICIAL PAPER OF
COUNTY.
CASS
J. A. MACMURPHY, Editor.
PERSEVERANCE CONQUERS."
TEftttS ; $2.00 a Year.
Terms, In Advance
toe crpy, one year 1X00
One copy, stx months 1.00
e copy, three months 50
Volume 9.
Plattsmouth, Nebraska, Thursday, October 23, 1873.
Number 30
Extrv CnriK or tttk Hvnti.D f"rnlo hy PW
J. StrciKht, at the l'ot t ifliei-, nnd U. F. Johu
son, comer of ftli'.ln iimt lift It St.
3i. A hirge aasorttnsnt of Clooks beodqxiartcra for XarBhcs' Patent Accommodation Spectacles. Uall and examine lor yonrselYoa.
' ' ' '' ' j ii i ' i i ' 1 ii ii iifcj i i mm ii i wmwMiiii im m ii i.i iimii" n i i n n i n n n i .n 'inn mi i i .i , mug mi i i in imiiiiii ii 1 1 i nwi mi', .inww
, '... . ........ .. . - : ; . ....
EBMSK1
inl IHilfn, AN II A
r
1
ATTORNEYS.
f B. RKESE. Attorney at Uw. Office on
M:iin Street, over Chapman's Dniir Store.
Special attention given to collection of Claims.
. B. whkeli:r, j. w.ftichcomb.
lTlici'lcr fc Sllnclicomb,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
49-ly Flattsinonth. Nebraska.
&OI. M.CnAMIAX. IU T. MAXWELL.
Cliupman Si. Maxwell.
ATTORNEYS AT LAV and Solicitors In
Cnanccnr. omce Id Fitzgerald's Mock, Platts
laonlh, Nebraska.
CKO. 8. SMITH, R. H. KIXDUAM,
K3I1T1I & 1YIYDIIAM.
Successors to Marquett, Smith, & Starblrd,
Attorneys at Law d-Jhal Estate Brokers
pLATTtiMOL'TII, - 'KH.
Special attention given to Collections, and all
matters affecting tho 1 itle to Real Estate.
Office ou 2d floor, over the Post Ofllce. '
rilYSICIANS.
KR. LIVINGSTON, Physician and Surgeon,
Tenders his professional services to the
citizens of t'ass count v. Hesidence southeast
corner of Oak and SixOi streets : efilce on Main
Treet, one iliKr west of Lyman's Lumber Yard,
i'lattsmouth. Ncbniska.
INSURANCE.
XCrriF.ELER & r.ENNETT Real Estate and
Taxpayinu Airents. Notaries Pi;llic, Eire
and Life Insurance Agents, i'lattsmouth. Neb.
1JHELPH PAIN K ;cr.eral Insurance Atreut,
Reitrcsents some of the moit reliable Com
panies lu tiie United States. janT-wtf
HOTELS.
BROOKS HOUSE,
JOHN riTZC.ERALD, Proprietor.
Maiu Street, between Fifth & Sixth.
MISCELLANEOUS.
IMattsnioutli MIllM.
CIIEISEL. Irorietor. Have recently been
repaired ami placed in thorough ruiuuiiB
order ifio.OiiO liusbels of Wheat wanted imiue
dlatclr tor which the highest market price will
be paid.
Abstracts of Title.
TH.F. C METRICAL SYSTEM Tli" best In ue
'or dtscriotive circulars, address.
ACRES, It LAC KM AR & CO..
P.urlinton. Iowa.
-GREENHOUSE AND BEDDING
PLANTS.
Time and money saved by order-ins ot rne. I
fcave the largest and best collection of Plants
ver offered for sale in the West. Catalogues
Iree. Sweet Potato. ( abl.ae. Toinat'.,p :vi '--tn
W Plants for sale in their season.
Address W. J. HESSER. Plattsmouth. eb.
Agents TYantcd.
FOR A ROOK NEEDED BY ALL
The best books published on the Horse and
the Cow. Liberal terms. Money made rapidly
by asouis tcliii.ri tin -ie books. Send for circu
lars. PORTER & COA-IKS.
rubiisheis, Philadelphia, Pa.
FINE AKT GALLERY.
fsTThotoaphs. Ambrotvpes and copies
from old pictures, plain or cofoied. either in ink
rater or oil. All work neatly executed and w ar-
rauted to eivs salisfaetion
V. V. LEONARD, Artist.
j-tf Maiu St., Plattsmouth, N'eb.
NEW DRUG STORE-
i
VRfriNO WAT KB, NfB.
POTTER & GAFFNEY,
DEALERS IX P.r.fiSS. MEDICINE'S. PAINTS,
OILS. VAKNIsH. PKI-I l MERY,
STATIONERY. NOTIONS,
C'USARS. TOilACCO,
AND UL.VSS.
tlTTma-xipiioaa carefully prepajrxL HWt.
L GOLDING,
Dealer in
CtOTniNO. Ft'KNISfUNO GOODS. nATS,
CAPS. ROOTS, SHOES, TRl'NKS,
VALISES. CARPET BAtiS,
&c, &c. &e., &c.
fne of the oldest nnd most Reliable Houses
In Plattsmouth. Main street, between Fourth
and Eiftli.
tr-KEMEMEEK TIIK PICE.
rautf.
NEW STYLES.
E. L. ELSTER,
MERCHANT TAILOR.
Is in receipt of the flnet and
BEST ASSORTMENT
:US51mfi:ks. ciths. vetinc.s. scotch
;OODS, ItHSlI FRIESES, &o.
Tn f cl the largest and best assortment of
Cloihs ever brought to this cily, which 1m
prewired to make up in the latest Styles. . ail
ana examine tJoods. a prills.
Mrs- A. D. Whilcomb,
DRESS AND CLOAK MAKER.
!rs three doors west of Brooks House.
CUTTING AND FITTING MADE
A SPECIALTY.
3P- Tatterns of all kinds constantly on band
2-ly.
J. W. SHANNON'S
FEED, SALE, & LIVERY STABLE.
Main street, Plattsmouth, Neb.
I am prepared to accommodate the public
uitli
Horses, Carriases,
Busies, Wagons.
? aud a N o. 1 Hearse.
On short notice and reasonable terms. A
Hack will run to the Steamboat Landing, Depot
and all parts of the city when desired.
JanltL
Blacksmith Shop.
CHAS. TtiFFANY,
JIT. PLEASANT, NEB.
Be?s leave to inform the farmers of
Cass County that ho keeps a good No. 1
BLACKSMITH SHOP
one mile north of lit. Pleasant.
All kinds of Iro"n Work attended to.
Wagons repaired, Farm Implements
carefully mended. Lowest prices, and
all work done on short notice.
Grain received in pavment. Give
jftfrftXMl. Gs&s. X. TVFAKT.
Official Directory.
. congressional.
T. W. Tipton, Rrownvillc V. S. Senator.
P. W. Hitchcock, Omaha I'. S. Senator.
L. Crouiise, Ft. Calhoun Representative.
EXECUTIVE.
R. W. Furnas Rrownville
.1. .1. G'srer, Lineolit
.1. R. Weston. Jieatriee
11. A. Kietiijr. Columbus
Governor.
Sec'y of State.
..Auditor,
Treasurer.
I. It. Webster, Crete.
Att'y Gen,
J. M. McKeuzie, Lincoln. ..Sup't Pub. Inslruc'n.
JUDICIARY,
Geo. R. Iike, Omaha Chief Justice.
Daniel Gantt. Nebraska City, 1 iM.i.,t Just's
Samuel Maxwell, Platts th, f Associate J usi s.
rLATTSMOUTn.
R. R. Livingston Mayor.
Phelps Paine City Clerk.
Win. Wintersteln ..City Treasurer.
J. W. Haines ..Polite Judge.
Miles Morgan Marshal.
1. N. Johnson Street Commissioner.
ALDERMAN.
First WAittt. J. Fitzgerald, H. S. Newman.
Skcomi Ward, J. Wayninn, t'. Nichols.
Thiki Waui. R. C. ensiling. Thos. Pollock.
Fouktii Waku. R. Vivian, L. F. Johnson.
CASS COCNTY.
TL F. Ellison
Daul McKinnon..
W. I.. Ilobbs
Probate .Tndge.
County Clerk.
Treasurer.
Sup't Pub. Instruct'n.
County Commissioners.
Coroner.
T. W. Wise...
Jacob Vallery,
i. i inrKe.
I.vman ,l:ime
cs. )
J. W. Thomas.
Churches.
Tt ARTIST On the corner of Main
and Ninth.
l'.v T -T An.oli! I'lLStor.
Servieos every
Sabbath, at 11 a. in. and 7 t. in. Sabbath School
at H a. m. Prayer meeting every Wednesday
evening.
CMJRISTIAN Service in Congregation Churoii
J at 1 1 a. in. and 6 : 30 n. in. ( 'onter of Ixwnst
and sth streets. Cordial invitation extended to
all classes to attend.
TTPISCOPAL Corner Vine and Third streets,
Minister. Services every Sunday at
11 :a. in. and 8 p. in. Sundav si liool at 3 p. m.
CATHOLIC- North side or Public Square. Rev.
Father Hobal. First Mass every Sabbath at
8-3U a. m.. Second Mass and sermon at 10-30,
VesxTH and Reiietlietion at 7 p. in. Mass at
8 a. in. every week day.
FIRST PRESBYTERIAN North side of Main
street, west of uth. Rev. W. T. Rartle ; Ser
vices everv Sabbath at 11 a. 111. and? p. ni.
Sabbath School at s-:ui a. 111. Prayer meeting
every Wednesday evening at 8 o'clock.
METHODIST EPISCOPAI
tttlwt v.tntlliif M:lhl
-West side of Cth
ev. C. McKelviey
Pastor.
Services every Sabbath, at 10 :; a. in..
and 7 n. m. Prayer meeting every Thursday
evenlmr.
Class meeting every .itniay evening.
and immediately after close of Sabbath
niorii-
inx services. Sabbath School at 2 -.30,
M. R.
Reese, Supcriutcmuuit.
C0NTAG den '.'4 September hat die Deutsche
Ev. Lutli. Gemeinds in iiireiu Sehulhuns vor
rurmtCs mu 11 Chr C.otteoilien.st. I'ebei haupt
linlet derst'lbe von jet.t an reseliitnewiii all
lagestatt. Minister, Rev. I linawaiil.
S'abbaih sclnn.1 at 1 p. ni., l'rI d'Allemand,
Superintendent.
Lodgei. j
T O. O. F. Regular meetiinrs of natte Lodge
No. 7, I. O. o. F. every '1 bursjay evening at
Odd Fellows' I fall. Transient B -fibers are cor
dially invited to visit.
E E. CUNNINGHAM, N. G.
RAi.F.x. Sriu.KiiKL, Secretary, l
I.
O. O. F. Pt.ATTSMOrTII E'( IMPMKVTKn.
3. Regular Convocations tl 2d and 4th
Friday's of each month ni Odd Fellows' Hall
corner 3d and Main streets. - Tiassicnt Patri
archs cordially invited to visit.
II. J, STRLIGHT, C. P.
H. Nkwmam, Scribe. . t
"fASONIC Pl.ATTSMOfTH LoiKtR NO. 6, A.
-L'1- I. & A. M. Regular meetinai at their Hall
on the first and third Monday evmingsof each
mouth. Trail .dent brethren invit-d to visit,
R. K. LIVING.-TON, W. M.
A. d'ALLKM AN r. Sec. ti
AfACOY LOL.5E No. 22. A. F. ti X. M. Recni-
lar meclinss at Macoy Hall, nnd third
Fridavs J.N. "WlfE, W. M.
J. M. RKMtDKt-KY. See. I'
VIIHUASKA CHAPTER No 3, V.. M. Reg--1
' ular Convocations second and fonirth Tues
day evenings of each month at 7S o'clock p. in.
R. R. LIVINGSTON. 1L P.
11. NrwMAV. Sec.
T O. G. T. OLIVE BRANCn. Vo. 2. Tt. n.
Re.lwell. W. C. T. ; !.!. Mi'andale. W.
See. ; T. W. Shryock. Lodge Deputy, meets at
Clark & Pbimmer's Hall every Tuesday eve
ning. Travelling Templars resiteciislly invited.
rfU'RN VEREIN. The Turner So-l j- meets at
Turners' Hil in (iuthiiian's B!. on the
first and tiiird Wednesdays of eacld Aonth.
A. Von Schwaisenberg," Vr..H.i.i'm , .( i.r;-p I
iarcner. v lee j resi.ieiu : ii. -ewiiian, Are;us
nrer ; W. Hreed. Reeordinsi Secretary' : Paul
I'.raidsch. Corr:spondidg Secretary ; William
Hasslcr. First Tnni Wart ; John Hons, Second
Turn Wart ; Oswald Guthman, Warden.
Purissima et Optima.
This unrivalled Medicine is warranted not to
contain a single particle of Mercury, r auy in
jurious mineral substance, but is
PURELY VEGETABLE.
For forty years it has proved its great value
in all diseases of the Liver. Bowels and Kidnejs
Thousands of the good and great in all parts of
the country vouch for its wonderful and j'culiar
fiower in purifying the blood, stimulating the
orpid liver ami bowels, and imparting new life
and vigor to the whole system. Simmons' Liv
er Regulator is acknowledged to have no equal
us a
LIVER MEDICINE,
It contains four medical elements, never nnit
Cd in the same happv proportion in anv other
f 'reparation, viz : a g rille Cathartic, a vvonder
ul Tonic, an nn-excej.tionable Alterative and a
certain Corrective of all impurities of the bod v.
Such signal success has attended its use, that it
is now rcganieu as me
GREAT UNFAILING SPECIFIC,
for Liver Complaint and the painful offspring
thereof., to-wit : Dyspepsia. Constipation,
Depression of spirits, hour Stomach, Heart
Burn, &.c. &e.
Regulate the Liver and prevent
CHILLS AND FFVER.
Prepared only by J. II. ZEII.IN & CO.
Druggists. Macon. Go.
Send for a Circular ) and ; Arch street.
Trice $1, by mail l.ia f Philadelphia Fa.
For sale by j. HB Buttery,
jan4-wly riatt.smouth. Neb.
MONEY SAVED
BY
nying Your Greenhouse and
Bedding Plants
AT TnE
Picnic Gardens.
i)ONT send East for Plants when you can get
Ju.st as good for less money nearer home.
To my numerous friends and patrans 1 would
say that I have the largest and best stock of
plants ever offered for sale in the West, and
at reasonable prices.
Be sure aud send for my
Xew Descriptive Catalogue.
which will be sent free to all who apply for it.
Then give me your orders, and I feel confident I
I can sati-!- you.
ANSWER TO FARMER J.S SONG.
BY WAX IX.
You want to be a farmer.
And with the farmers stand ;
O then you mast go to work.
And with them bear a hand.
Don't stand upon the corners
A talking blatherskite,
Rut earn your thousands, thousands.
By working day and night.
O, do not fear to labor.
And in the field to plow ;
Or to feed the little pigs,
Nor milk the niulley covv.
Never stop to count the cost.
Rut work with all your might ;
And earn your thousands, thousands.
By working day and night.
To be an nonet fanner,
Just use a little care ;
Never seek for an office.
Nor long to take the chair.
But work like an honest man.
With honor Just in sight.
Earning every dollar.
By working day aud night.
O, never get discouraged.
You'll not regret the change ;
And when you are farmer,
We'll take'you in the Grange,
There right before the Master,
YouH tremble and turn white ;
Now vou'll earn your money;
By working day and night.
Elmwtooh, Neb., Oct. 13, 1R73.
BEATING TIIE HAVANA.
It was a sunshiny morning, jnst such
as would entice a languid, idling fel
low lik6 myself to stroll about the city
and enjoy the fragrant breezes of a
New Orleans October. There wad
nothing particularly requiring me to
regale myself over a cup of chockolate,
for I had not long breakfasted, but
then, leisurely wandering down Ex
change alley, the sight of the creamy
beverage in a neighboring cafe excited
a desire.-and, as our family have never
been known to refuse themselves any
gratification, I took my seat at one of
the tables and called for what I wanted.
Perhaps it was because the aroma of
the steaming cup baought back remin
iscences of past adventure, or perhaps
it was because of a very remarkable
similarity of voice, but when a wheezy
old gentieman accosted me with "Tick-
re Ur tor tlw- Havana lottery,' gentle
men?" I could have sworn that I was
transported back fifteen years. The
same drawling intonation, the same
timid, experimental dropping of each
word, as it were, to see if it hurt before
another would follow. There was that
appearance about the man which be
tokened a wealth of poverty, a loose,
vagabond fit to his coat, and tendency
to fall on the part of his pantaloons.
It's true, there were no patches, but,
notwithstanding this, any student of
human nature would have put him
down as the last of the Micawbers.
No; his nose was not red but there was
an abscinthe glisten in his eye which
told of potations which do not give the
aristocratic red to that facial ornament.
Not desiring to seek future competency
through the agency of the lottery, I
gave a n cgative to his humble query,
and was still wrapt in my endeavors
to discover why it was this old man
had so stirred the Lethean waters of
the past, when down ho sat in a chair
opposite me at the table. "Pardonncz,
moi, monsieur," said he, "but I think I
nnw
falling- bufuro-ttrty
war." I simply .nodded, merely to ex
press that there was such a possibili ty,
when my strange ticket vender went
on : ""May not your name be Sturgis,
and did you not live once at the corner
of and St. Charles streets V It is
said, I do not know by what authority,
that when a man touches off a powder
magazine ho experiences the peculiar
sensation of not feeling anything at
all ; and if this idea lie correct, I do not
know any nearer approximation to my
own situation when the shaky old man
by his questions showed how well he
knew me. I gazed inquiringly into his
face, and slowly as a landscape is some
times gradually exposed to the view by
melting of the mist, I saw the features
of what was once the gallant and reck
less Don Jose Castillo, the leading spir
it in the gay pleasures of this city
twenty years ago. Every one who ha3
unexpectedly met old companions, who
were once wealthy, in reduced circum
stances, naturally feel emotions of pity
and sympathy for the condition of
their acquaintance ; but where tho situ
ations are so extreme from Croesosan
affluence to abject penury there is a
much stronger chord touched.
Calling for chockolate for the once
lordly grandee, I rattlel on, putting
question after question, until the ves
ler bells at the cathedral warned me
of an engagement at the theatre that
evening.
Don Jose C.stillo was looked upon
by all as a man of millions. He lived
in an elegant house on Royal street in
the year 1853, and excited considerable
comment Toy the dinners which he
there gave. Old ladies said there could
be heard of an afternoon strains of
operatic music gently stealing through
the closed shutters, mingled now and
then with liquid peals of laughter from
throats too soft for mascnlines. How
he had made hi3 money no one knew,
only that he had an abundance of ft.
In my interview yesterday I learned
his history.
In Cuba, from a loy, he' attended the
drawing of the lottery, aud had become
Infatuated with the spirit of gambling.
"Nothing gave him more pleasure than
his study of some mode to defeat the
chances against him, and for hours ho
would lose himself in the depths of re
' search after the secret' Suddenly it
was noticed one day in Havaaa that he
had gone, no one knew whither, and
shortly after there arrived here a man
with a large brood of carrier-pigeons.
He took a garret room opposite the
French Market, and but little wa3
thought of him, as ho kept aloof from
the crowd which usually hung around
the cabaret Once or twice he had
been seen going on board Cuban steam
ships to send a friend, as he said, a
beautiful pigeon. Then a street Arab
swore in jatoui objurgations that he
had seen a bird fly in the Spaniard's
window with, a piece of paper around
its neck. But no one thought any
thing of it, and the boy was sent to the
market to bring a supply of sassafras
root for his ailing padrone.
Time passed on, and the Spaniard
would leave his quarters fur a week at
a time, and one day drove up to the
old boarding-house in a rich cabriolet
and carried his little trunk and pigeons
off. Tho barkeeper across the way en
tertained his nightly visitors with cu
rious tales about the mysterious man,
but the birds and owner were soon for
gotten. With the disappearance -of the
man there arrived at the St. Louis Ho
tel a gentleman of largo means, who
took the most spacious rooms, and be
came soon the leader of a coterie, and
this man wa3 Don Jose Castillo.
The tickets for the Havana lottery
were kept on sale in New Orleans in
those days, when there was no cable to
Cuba, sometimes a week or ten days
after the drawing. A carrier-pigeon
could make the passage inVnine hours
and bring a list of the drawing long
before the steamer. This was how
Don Jose became the rich spendthrift,
and made his money. The instant a
list could be made out' in Havana a
bird was despatched to New Orleans,
and Don Jose would wander about in
search of the lucky prizes. Sometimes
he would make twenty thousand a
month, sometimes only three, but he
spent what he gained, so satisfied wa3
he is of his future ability to continue
his plans. But one day a cable was
laid, and Othello's occupation was gone.
lDonna--MKriJ-Bon J03e s.Vid,erviI
lauo- -telegrafo, they ruin me." And
the old man l6ttGretl. off puffing short
whitfs of smoke from his" cigarette,. in
search of a purchaser for his tickets.
" W7iit,n i7i New Orleans Picayune.
ATHLETIC SPORTS.
How they Worked the Rapid Rain of an
Estimable Correspondent.
From the New York Daily Graphic
You have lately advocated atldetic
sports as being innocent, healthful, and
improving to mind and morals.
Ye who believe in the benefits of
boating, ball-playing, and racing, list
ening to the story of a Rich Young
Man. -
Five years ago I came into a large
property. No matter how it came to
me. Perhaps I made it in the Havana
exchange or the stock brokers' lottery.
It is sufficient for mo to state the fact
that I was rich.
I said to myself, MI will not squander
this money in the pursuit of headaches
and the wrath of jealous husbands. I
rwUl, oil Tuc'KTttfryri
sports, and thu3, while enjoying myself
in a rational manner, become a shining
example to my generation."
I subscribed largely to a base-ball
club, and enrolled myself among its
active members. I wore stockings and
shirts of sucli preternatural patterns
that an African zebra would have been
ashamed to recognize me as a fellow
beast. Well, I played base-ball all one sum
mer with the following net results.
I was approached twelve times by
other base-ball men. or base-ball bet
ters with bribes to permit myself to be
caught out without making a score.
I made twelve bitter enemies by de
clining to accede to their proposal; I
broke thrc'j fingers, sustained a perma
nent flattening of the nose, and sprained
my back in a way that renders it weak
to this day.
At the end of the sca.son I gave up
base-ball forever, and spent the winter
in building a yacht, with which to cul
tivate yachting during the following
summer.
That yachts Vhen she was first tried
under sail, proved so astonishingly fast
that Pat McGiehan, who built her,
urged me to match her against any
yacht afloat for any sum of money.
I was greatly pleased, and asked a
friend to propose me for membership
in the New York Yacht Club. He did
so, and I was promptly black-balled.
lly friend afterwards told me that it
was asserted that I had shifed ballast
during a race. As, however, I had
never yet entered any boat for any race,
the charge was rather difficult to prove.
The refusal to admit me to the club
was naturally annoying. However,
my friend told me to cut down my
yacht's sails, so as to materially lesser,
her speed, and he thought that the
club would reconsider its action. I did
so; and at the next club meeting was
unanimously elected.
Being always fond of the water, I
was delighted when my yacht was en
rolled among those of the club, and was
ready to sail races with the rest of the
fleet. So I challenged the other yachts
and expected to have an exciting race.
To my surprise, their owners, one
and all, refused to race except in the
inner harbor, and only on condition
that there should be no brceae. This
was inexplicable, and I went at oce
to the friend who had secured my elec
tion, and asked for an explanation.
He smiled. Said he: "Don't you
know that our fellows never race when
there is a wind ? They don't want ei
ther to be sea-sick or to be drowned."
Then I asked him why they owned
yachts and prtended to be yachtsmen.
Said he: "A yacht is a nice thing
when one wants to give a dinner party
to which one's wife is not admitted.
Then there is lots of fun in lying in
the Jiarbor and throwing up rockets at
night. The uniform is pretty, and the
girls all fancy we are fearless sailors.
Do as we do, and you will enjoy your
self." That style of yachting, however, did
pot suit me, and I persisted in trying
to make up a match f er an ocean race.
At last I found a yachtsman who
agreed to sail twenty miles to wind
ward and back with me. There was
a nice breeze on the day of the'race,
and my rival looked pale and anxious.
Refore we had been outside of the
Hook for half an hour it was blowing
a gale of wind. The yacht that had
been matched against mine ran back
to port. I, however, kept on and
achieved the following results:
My yacht was so badly strained that
she was useless for the rest of the sea
son. My maingaff was carried away, and,
falling on deck, broke four ef my ribs
and my right ankle,
I sold that yacht the next season,
and gave up yachting as I had given
up base-ball. I have never recovered
the full use of my broken ankle, and
shall walk lame for the rest of my
days.
The next season canoeing became
fashionable, and I bought a canoe.
The third time I went out in her I cap
sized in the bay. It was in April, and
the water was horribly cold. After
clinging for an hour to the canoe I was
picked up, and have had the chronic
rheumatism ever since. What beenrne
of that canoe I don't know ; neither do
I care. I heaxd, JUoweveiwthat a Jer-
j sey ' undertaker- bdught""it7 luid adver
tised it a3 a new style of cofiln.
I was now lame, rheumatic, and
hardly able to use my right hand in
CG23ti?nce of broken fingers. I,
therefore, toOk-tllS lurf3-4Ii2--Sly
form of oufc-door sport in which I could
In two years I had three of my best
horses poisoned. I had lost twenty
thousand' dollars by backing my own
stable when my jockeys had been
bought by other turfmen, and I had
been thrown by my favorite mare, who
broke my collar-bone, and kicked by a
vicious brute, who broke my left leg.
Then I gave up the cultivation of
open-air sports forever. ,
Behold me now, at thirty : A man
lame in both legs, weak in the spine,
damaged in ribs, collar-bone, and fing
ers ; with a nose flattened, and every
bone a prey to chronic rheumatics.
Do you expect me to endorse your
praises of athletic sports ?
I tell you . that there is ilo. delusion
to be compared with that which you so
recklessly advocate. Athletic sports
have beenjrnv.ruin,. iWI T r:mnntwiioi
the money
that! still
have, because I
am too much broken in pieces to do
anything except to lio on a sofa, or to
be carried into a carriage.
May your readers take warning by
the fate of A Ilicn Young Max.
COUSIN SALL1E DILLAKD.
A Story that Must Not Die.
"Cousin Sallie Dillard" was written
by Hamilton C. Jones, of North Caro
lina, nearly half a century ago, and
the public can enjoy a hearty laugh
over its exquisite ridiculousness at
least once a year. It purports to be a
report of a witness in a case before
one of the courts of that State, and is
as follows :
A beardless disciple of Themis rises
and thus addresses the court: "May it
please your worship, and you, gentle
men of the jury, since it has been my
fortune (good or bad I will not say) to
exercise in legal disquisition, it has
never befallen me to be obliged to
prosecute so direfully marked an as
sault. A more willful, violent and
dangerous battery, and finally a more
diabolical breach of peace has seldom
ever happened in a civilized country,
a'nd I dare say it has seldom been your
duty to pass upon one so shocking to
benevolent feelings as this which took
place over at Capt. Rice's in this coun
ty ; but you will hear from the wit
nesses." The witnesses being sworn, two or
three were examined and deposed.
One said ho heard the noise, but did
not see the fight; another that he saw
the row but did not know who struck
first; another that he was very drunk
and could not say anj-thing about the
scrimmage.
Lawyer Chops I am sorry, gentle
men, to have occupied your time with
the stupidity of the witnesses exam
ined. It arises, gentlemen, altogether
from a misapprehension on my part.
nad I known as I do, that I had a wit
ness who was acquainted with all the
circumstances of the case and who was
able to make himself understood to
the court and jury, I should not have
trespassed so long on your patience.
Come forward, Mr. Harris, and be
sworn. " - . .
So forward comes the witness, a fat
chuffy old man, a "leetel" corned, and
took his ath with an air.
Chops Harris, we wish you to tell
us about the riot that happened tho
other day at Capt. Rice's, and as a good
deal of time has already been wasted
in circumlocution, we wish to be com
pendious, at the same time as explicit
as possible.
Harris Adzactly, (giving the law
yer a knowing wink, at the same time
clearing tip his throat.) Capt Itice he
gin a treat, and cousin Sally Dillard
she comes over to my house and axed
me if my wife she moutn't go ? I told
cousin Sally Dillard my wife was poor
ly, being as how sho had a touch of
rheumatism in the hip, and the big
swamp was up in the road, there hav
ing been a great deal of rain lately,
however as it was she, cousin Sally
Dillard, she mout go. Well, cousin
Sally Dillard then axed me if Mose he
moutn't go? I told cousin Sally Dil
lard that he was the foreman of the
crap ; and the crap was smartly in the
grass, but however, as it was she, cous
in Sally Dillard, Mose he mout go.
Chops In the name of common
sense, Mr. Harris, what do you mean
by this rigmarole ?
Witness Captian liice he gin a treat,
and cousin Sally Dillard sho came over
to my house and axed me if my wife
she couldn't go ? and I told cousin Sal
ly Diliafd
Chops Stop if you please; we don't
want to hear about cousin Sully Dil
lard or your wife; tell us about the
fight at Rice's.
Witness Well, I will sir, if you'll
let me.
Chops Well, sir, go on.
Witness Well, sir, Capt. Rice he gin
a treat, and cousin Sally Dillard she
came over to my house and axed me if
my wife she moutn't go
Chops Here it is again. Witness
please to stop.
Witness Well, sir, what do you
want ?
Chops We want to know about the
fight; and you must not proceed in
this impertmtrstQT;r
anything about the matter now before
the court?
Witness To be sure I do.
Chops Well go on then, and tell us
it and nothing else.
-"W--".w-"---Vf Rice he fr-j
a treat. . , i
Chops This is intolerable. May it
please the court, I move that the pris
oner be committed for Contempt. He
seems to be trifling with the court.
Court Witness, you are before a
court of justice, and unless you behave
yourself in a more becoming manner
you will bo sent to jail ; so begin and
tell me what you know about the fight
at Rice's.
Witness Well, gentlemen. Captain
Rice he gin a treat, and cousin Sally
Dillard
Court (After deliberating.) Mr. At
torney, the court is of the opinion that
we may save time by letting the wit
ness go on in his own way. Proceed
Mr. Harris, with your story, but stick
to the subject.
Witness Yes, gentlemen. Well,
Captain Rice he gin a treat, and cousin
fny - Itlhtr j-t Afflgf
aud axed me if my wife moutn't go?
I told cousin Sally Dillard that my
wife she was poorly, being as how
she had the rheumatism in her hip;
aud the big swamp was up; however,
as it was she, cousin Sally Dillard, my
wife she mout go. Well, cousin Sally
Dillard then axed me if Mose he mout
n't go? I told cousin Saliy Dillard as
how Mose was the foreman of the
crap, and the crap was smartly in grass,
however, as it was she," cousin Sally
Dillard, Mose he mout go. So they
goes on together, Mose, my wife and
cousin Sally Dillard, and they came to
the big swamp, and it was up as I was
telling you; but' being as how there
was a big log across the big swamp,
cousin Sally Dillard and Mose, like
genteel folks, they walked the log, but
my wife like a durned old fool, she
hoisted her coats and waded through.
Chops Heavens and earth, this is
too bad ; but go on.
.Witness Well, that's all I know
about the fight.
NAST AT H03IE.
The Tale of a Lamp-Post Within the
Stndio of the Carrioatnrist- -.
Something about the Lec
ture of Mr. Nast.
Correspondence of New Y'ork Evening Post.l
Morristown, N. J., Oct. 0, '73.
When showing his visitors about
this beautiful city among the moun
tains, the average Morriatowner fails
not to take them to the house of Mr.
Thomas Nast, which i3 situated on one
of the finest avenues in the city, and
points his tale with the history of the
now famous lamp-post which stands
near the "house. For the ordinary
looking lamp-post has a history, and an
amu.-iug one at that. When Mr. Nast
one day having his house and fences
painted, he gave orders to also renovate
the lamp post by painting it the same
eolor as his house. But the city au
thorities had first to be applied to for
permission, and so the petition of Mr.
Thomas Nast to the honorable Mayor
and Common Council of Morristown,
for permission to paint a certain larap
post, was duly presented, and after
brief consideration the prayer of the
petitioner was granted.
Bat a local paper, jfirat and hungry
for a good item, seized upon that peti
tion and commented thereupon. Why,
said he, should Nast bo allowed to
paint his lamp post to suit himself,
when Jones, the barber, was fined for
turning one into a barber's pole, and
also Block, the hatter, for placing a
sun-shade, in the shape of a huge um
brella, aver the post in front of his
storw? What will Nast do with his
lamp-post now that he has got it?
Perchance ho may turn it into a carri
caturerbf Greeley, '.of Tweed or HalL
He may make the headlight iuto the
likeness of the face of Mr. Creeley,
the cross b.nr into his extended arms,
and the post into his body and legs.
Tbeii will the Liberal Republicans
gather in strength (it was in tho early
part of the lato campaign) and bear
the image off to their club-rooms as a
trophy; or the Democrats,first arriving
at the scene, will break down or de
stroy the whole concern. Thus, in
either case, will the city of Morristown
lose her $20 larup-poflt a loss which
her attenuated coffers can ill afford.
It was a harmless little paragraph
enough when first .written, and none
laughed more heartily than did Mr.
Nast, who had painted his lamp-post a
a neat drab color. But the paragraph
was copied eagerly by other papers,
and a word was left out here and ad
ded there till lo! that "perchance" arti
cle turned iuto a "positive," and when
it reached the West and South it stated
that Mr. Nast 7utd done all those
things which the local reporter only
suggested he inig7it do. And then
from the West and South came grave
editorials howling how very wicked it
was of Mr. Nast to "lampoon" Mr.
Greeley in this matter; and by one pa
per the Liberals were congratulated
for their promptness in digging up and
removing the lamp-post; and by an
other to the Democrats was awarded
tho credit for at once destroying the
unholy thing. The poor city of Mor
ristown w.'is also abused for permit
ting Tr. Nast to make carricaturcs on
a majority of the lamp posts of . that
Vcitj ilxit thfr absurdity leadi its cli
max when, some months after the first
squib was written, it reached a city
very far West, and a paper there round
ly lectured Mr. Nast for carricaturing
Mr. -Greeley in that shocking way when
rtaf". wntlernnri V.' Hpfwl ja !
xixu 5 -'--J -'"
history- or last's Morristown lamp
post, wtiicii yet stands a monument of
the wonderful chameleon powers of
the floating newspaper paragraph.
When you hear a man speak of
molasses as "treakle," you can set him
down as an old settler from Whoopole
township, Posey county, Indiana.
Ottawa Republican.
When you see a man spell treacle
with a k, and hoop-pole with a w, you
can set him dowrn as having emigrated,
when quite young, from Posey county,
Indiana to Pike county, Missouri,
where they have no spelling-books.
White Cloxul Chief.
The World says; Wja have re
deemed Ohio, redeemed Oregon, made a
gain in Pennsylvania arid insured a
redemtion of New York, and the
Republicanpa.rjscfi--,,d
shattered.
From the above it draws the follow
ing conclusion: First, the Liberal
Republicans as an organized party
have taken no root in politics and have
no element of growth on which they
can build hopes of the future record1
The idea that Democrats will disband
and dissolve their organization is an
exploded fancy. The opposition party
for next year will be Democratic and
no other party.
Concerning the recent change in re
gard to the capital of Connecticut, tho
Boston Journal saysJ Hartford is to
be hereafter the capital of Connecticut,
and the boys and girls in the high
grammar schools will "govern them
selves accordingly. " New Haven
will be the seat of the famous old col
lege, and the center of interest to tiie
student and the oarsman ; which ought
to be distinction and satisfaction
enough. Witli the settlement of this
long-continued and bitter "controversy,
we may reasonably hope for a better
state of political feeling between these"
two cities. They are not so far apart,
either, to make it difficult for the New
Haven Senators and Representatives
to reach tho capital ; and we suppose
Hartford will think, and we are iiK-lin-ed
to believe they will be more than
half right in thinking, that if Yale
sticks to its theology and its science it
will do itself as great credit as it does
when it professes tb deal with tho
theory of caucuses and philosophies on
the duties of "bolting"-3specially when
its contemplations so invariably lead
to the conclusion that a caucus which
nominates a Hartford man is not bind
ing, and that the right to bolt any but
a New Haven nomination is a natural
and inalienable one, to be used on any
occasion which presents "itself. The
defeat of General Ilawley for the Unit
ed States Senate and the election of
the Democratic Governor Igersoll, are
the tatest trophies of New Haven
philosophy, and we hope the tempta
tions to such independent action are
now effectually closed. That the eco
nomical considerations are all in favor
of having one capital thf re can be no
doubt and when these combine with
the advantage of closing a needless
and crimonious quarrel, the people of
Connecticut may well be congratulated
on the vol of .Monday:
HOW THEY LICKED Ilia.
Tho Way They Do Things In Buffalo?
From the Buffalo Express.)
A good thing happened on Ohio
street, near Washington, about 5
o'clock yesterday afternoon. Its hu
morous phase caused some of tho lookers-on
to liken it to tho Yokes farce oj!
"The Wrong Man iu tho Right Place'."
Two young men were driving down
Ohio street iu a buggy. A"lud of thfl
ago of fourteen years ir thcroabc'u'ts;
who is in the employ of Cheslcy &
Graham, attempted to pass the buggy
with an ordinary rnaiket-wagon. Iri
some manner the two vehicle inrtlally
locked wheels, nnd, a'.thocgh the lad
speedily extricated his wagon", opt) of
tho occupants of the buggy leaued for
ward and struck him across the should
ers with a whip. The loy drove on un til
he caino to Messrs. Chelsey & Gra-'
ham's store, where ho turned iu to
wards tho sidewalk and stopped. As
the buggy came Up oro ofthejoung
men struck the lud another blow. '
Quickly dismounting from his scat;
the justly a;rievcd youth called out;
"111 pay you for this!" and ran for a
half-tilled water pail which was stand
ing near the curb-stone. Swinging
that up in the air he brought it and its
contents down on the heads of the ma-'
licious occupants of tho buggy. They
Wero pretty thoroughly wet tod, and it
is quite it n necessary to say that they
were mad. One of them jumped dowii
and went for that boy, but tho boy was
ready for hiin with a peck measure.
And when the pdek measure had dis
charged its duty as a missile, u large
sized sweet potato from the lad's fist
im;t tho young man's noso more thaii
half way. Then the boy ran for the
store, w -i tli tho angry youug irian hot
after him. The chaso was a short one,
for the plucky little fellow could go no
farther than tho store counter; and
there his assailant clinched him. With
blood in his eye, the mart Was ou tho'
point of administering asoumhlM'ijjh
ing to his -victim, vrLi.i the other yen..
man made his appearance on tho spot
He had got out of the buggy to hti f
whip tho boy; As" s :on as ho saw tht
two per3oiis grappl'n;: over the countli
he hauled off and struck out vigoruui
Jy at the nearest one. T,,a ? r ,rfsf ri "j
happened to be young man No. i, 1ml
the new comer did not appear to 1. tw
it, for he sent in a second blow afv
the first and followed tho thlrig uj
with three or four more. And theem-r
phasizing grunts which followed eaellj
blow told that the striker meant bulf
ness.
Young man No. 1 tnn I j !
around to see who v; i l ii . Ing hint.,'
and got a fr'arful blo'- in the eye, which'
transmitted a Pablo l int to tho whole
of that side of his lace; but, catchin.
a glimpse of tho attacking party, h
blurted out:
"What the devil are you hitting ma
for?" V
"Ehl" responded No. 2, with som:
astonishment, 113 he saw whom he had
been pummeling. i
"Why, I thought you was the otheiKj
fellow-" , , JJt
"'Well. I ain't f lujruf-Hoilsly an
swered No. 1, as he tenderly fondled
his swollen check.
In tho meantime the lad escapui
into the back ynrd, where he stood
peering through a crack in tho door;
and chuckling over the littlo misunder
standing. In a few minutes the two young men
came to the conclusion that tho episodo
had no honors for them; therefoid
they silently got into their buggy and
drove away.
Iowa Election;
Dlv? Moines, Oct. 15.
The Republican majority in thi
State will not be far from 30,000. There
was a terrific scratching of tickets.
In this county the Republican majori
ty is about 800. The Republicans elect
one Representative, and the Anti-mo-'
nopolists one Representative, and tho'
State Senator, Treasurer, and Sheriff.
Speakership
tt is now reported that Hon. J. A:
Kasson, of Iowa, whose namo has been
in some quarters urged for the Speak
ership, declines to be a candidate
against Mr. Blaine. If this is so, the
re-election of Speaker Blaine, reason
ably probable at any rate, becomes"
quite certain. The only other candi
date suggested of sucli experience and
general acquaintance as to have any
chance of success, is Mr. Maynard, of
Tennessee, and his very decided opin
ions so widely differ from those quite'
generally entertained by Western Re-'
publicans that we presume he would
not be able to unite their votes, eveil
if Mr. Blaine were objected to. But
Speaker Blaine has already done Be
much to secure his popularity with
Western people end members, and so'
well represents the prevailing senti
ments of the people of this sectioa irf
respect to the Credit Mobiliet, the back
pay and other kindred matters, that
we judge he will command the almost
unanimous support of Western Kepab-'
liciui. Alike as the hearty supporter
of th President, the sincere advocato
of thorough reforms within And
through the Republican party, and tho
most capable and qualified Speaker the?
HoLi.-?f has seen for mny years, he der
serves the honor which will doubttef?
now be aJvded.J-Vi.'
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