is ;! r jr"""i$ '"" " '
NOVEMBER t, lJllt
The Commoner.
15
PATENTS
band fortunes for you. Our
free booklet tellt how, and
what to invent for profit.
Bankers and manufacturers references. Tcruui
reasonable.
D. SWIFT & CO.
3SI Seventh Street, WASHINGTON, D. C.
FREE BOOKLET wordiits.we!chtinjrotd.
Have you catarrh, asthma, bad cough, lots of weight and poor
appetite f Write particular. 710 International Hank Bids.
Lus Angeles, Cah
GOV
'HRNMENT Positions are easy to eet. Mr lre
uookiei aiuio teu now, wwe loaiy nuw,
KARI. UOrKlXS, Waihlnjloo, 1. U
Tobacco Factory Wants Salesmen. te;vd WrrJ
nd Promotion. Experience unnecessary, as we cWc Complete
instructions. Piedmont 1 Obicco Co.i o oai, Duuit, v
A Kidney Specialist
Should be employed if yoa want the
best result. Why ttkepatent nostrums
and employ InexperlenceJUoctori when
your life Is at stake. When yoa want
food work done you employ aa experi
enced nun. Why not apply the same
...i. Kn vmf hrahh needs attention.
In the past 24 years I hare treated orer
40,000 aalienta. More than your fam
ily doctor would. treat in 200 years
Why not ret the benefit of my experi
ence when it cost no more than the
t.mtiv jnrtnr. nnrunhnlon and exam-
Inxtlon of arine free. Write today for malllnc case for
urine and book of cure. Address
DR. J. F. SHAFER, Specialist,
408 Pobh Ave.. Box I, Pittabargh, Pa.
ommoaorMat
M. EDISON Says:
mwm
K&lalaBw
RHEUMATISM
liet Me Send You My New External In
vention That 1st Relieving TUouunndJi
TO TRY FItlDE
SEND NO MONEY JUST COUPON
Don't derange your system with
drugs when I promise you quick relief
with 'my simple Majclc Foot Draft n, so
certain in their action that I send thorn
TO 'VllX IVllUilU.
JM -"'"v
int!fr&C&w,Ltt&W?!KLi
fcJRERaam. 3aB!caKsAw
wEnmW&sffi''
Fuisd'k Dykk, Cor. Sec.
Sign and mail
my coupon to
day. Return
post will bring
you a regular
Dollar pair of
Jttrxi K I c Ko-ol
DrnftM,' the
frreat Michigan
lomedy for
every kind of
Rheumatism
chronic or
acute, muHcu
Inr, Inflamma
tory, Hclatic,
lmitlmiro. trout.
otn.. no matter
v where tho pain
or how severe.
When you get
them and try
them, then if
von am fullv
satisfied with the benefit received, you
can send mo One Dollar. If not, keep
your money I take your word. You
can see that I couldn't make such an
offer if my Drafts didn't give quick and
lasting results.
If you could see the thousands of
letters I get saying my Drafts have
cured after everything else failed
cured even after 30 and 40 years
of suffering, as
well as all tho
milder stages
of this cruel
disease, you
would not
questlo'n m y
.-. rrof
claims. You would send at once to get
tho same relief and comfort so many
others got. Remember, tho risk of
loss is all mine you pay only when
satisfied. Can anybody make a really
fairer offer? Don't delay, but send my
counon at once now.
This $I.OO Coupon FREE
Good for a regular $1.00 pair oTMasic Foot
rafta to bo sent Free to Try (as explained
above) to
Namo
Add ess
Moll this coupon to Masrlc Foot Draft Com
Dany. XCM5 Oliver Bide;., Jackson, Mich.
ITIh Limitations
Kan Ib a pretty wise animal. He
has solved many problems, and as a
result he la mightily puffed up. But
he has his limitations. Ho can figuro
out to the fraction of a socond whon
a certain planet will cross tho path of
another planet
But ho hasn't yet learned why
birds migrate, nor how they fly.
He can put a lot of wheels and
wire together and generate a force
he calls electricity, and with it he
can perform wonders
But he doesn't know what electri
city Is, nor why it is.
He can generate power at a given
point, convey it hundreds of miles
over a slender wire, and with It light
a metropolis
But he has never been able to dis
cover how a lightning bug or a glow
worm generates light without heat.
He can build toworlng buildings,
huge cathedrals, giant Lhips and im
mense bridges across broad and tur
bulent streams
But he can not make an egg, nor
explain why tho Inside of a water
melon is red, the outside green and
the seeds black.
He can navigate tho ocean and is
beginning to navigate the air
But he can not stay the ocean's
tides nor divert the currents of the
air
just about the time !io gets puffed
up so bis over his conquests of na
ture that he is just about to explode
with a loud report, old Mother Na
ture smiles and hands him a jolt that
knocks all the wind out of him. He's
pretty bis, to be sure, but compared
with what he has done what he
hasn't done Is as a grain of sand to
the bulk of the universe.
days," queried the Dissolved Trust,
setting down tho refreshment recep
tacle and wiping its lips.
"Mo?" Oh, I'm doing tho vandc
vlllo circuit with my wonderful 'king
of tho handcuffs' act. And your'
"Oh, I'm kept busy now keeping
tab on my constituent eloments and
figuring up my increased dividends."
In reBponso to a light presBiiro
upon tho button the refreshment re
ceptacles wore replenished.
7 Want to Set
a Phonograph
in Every
American
Home''
miif WL'lVlK4r'1flaUkJa0VLs aaiE aaTiaTW tM JfaLLWl
"Of All Sad Wortlrj "
"My plum jolly wouldn't jell."
"I smell that poach butter scorch
ing." "I'm orry, mother; but I can't
leavo you a cent this morning."
"Wish I could, old man; but I'm
overdrawn at the bank myself right
now."
"There's isn't a single ticket left
in tho ice book."
"Please remit."
AoeuAM
SW jVifl
Rural Society
The tree appeared in its bare limbB
To every one's surprise;
The cabbage turned away its head,
Potato shut its eyes.
The talk was such corn stopped its
ears
And blood-red blushed the beet;
And celery turned pale with shame,
While shocked was all the wheat.
The evergreen began to pine,
The turnip settled down;
Upon the face of four-o'clock
Appeared an awiui irown.
The face of all the field around
Was furrowed o'er with care.
Poor tree! Tt couldn't do a thing
For it had nought to wear.
Suspicion
"What's tho prlsonor charged
with?" queried tho police magis
trate. "No charge yet, your honor. I ar
rested him on suspicion."
"What Is ho suspected of being, or
doing?"
"I think by his actions, your
honor, that he Is a New York police
man seeking concealment."
Paradoxical
When a man is "tight" he general
ly cuts loose.
When a man is "tanked up" ho
generally goes down.
When a man Is "crooked" he gen
erally talks his straightest
When a woman appears in "full
dress" she usually iBn't.
Explained
Cumso "How did you spend your
vacation?"
Rlchleigh "At the rate of about
$15 a day. I was fool enough to put
up at one of those fashionable hotels
at the seashore."
Brain Leaks
110 sehedute'showintf examination nUre.
rrauUla iailHnt. I't III), XlotlUr. . T. i
These Moke Us Tired
The speaker who says, "Now just
one more word and I am done"
then keeps on talking for an hour
longer.
The man who knows just how
everything ought to be done and in
sists on telling it.
The woman who wastes time pet
ting a -blear-eyed poodle when there
are so many motherless children
seeking home and love.
The old graybearci wno tries to
act like a boy, and the old maid who
tries to act kittenish.
The fellow who thinks that dollars
make up for his lack of common
sense. A Reunion
One day a Shackled Cunning met
up with a Dissolved Trus-atjd the
two journeyed hastily to the nearest
refreshment ;bazdar. , -l ' ;
"Well, what'are'you d6ingrtheso
Always look before you leap then
walk around it if you can.
Some men are dead a long time
before they achieve success.
A symptom of indigestion "Gone
to lunch; back In ten minutes."
The man who lives fox dollars gets
mighty little worth while out of life.
Tho man who believes only what
he sees or can understand has a
mighty small conception of life.
Mentioning an example of self
deception there's the man who
dyes his whiskers. No one else is
deceived.
We jail the man who steals dol
lars, but we point to the financial
success of the man who robs youth
of its playtime.
wviftn wr want to read fiction wc
can always find it in the advertise
ments of furnaces that "save one
third to one-half the fuel bill."
The easiest thing in the world to
give is advice; the easiest thing In
tho world to make is criticism; the
easiest thing In tho world to take is
offense.
After working for a few months
at thp first job I ever had I conceived
tho idea that the firm couldn't get
along without me. But it could
and did. This country can get along
Free Tria
of any of the wonderful new
style liaisons you want to
hear in your own home.
The Edison Offer:
Get the phonograph
on trial first. You arc
wider ho obligation to
keen the outfit if
you do not find it
satisfactory in your
opinion. You arc
free to return the out
fit at our cxjMJtMe.
Could any of for be
inlrerl Now. heft.rc de
ciding upon your choice of
the outfit you want on irec
trial get the Edison cata
log of new stvic outfits
and list of wonderful
Edison Amhcrol records.
THE ROCK-BOTTOM-
PRICE:
Wf Will lir vntl linvr nn ff tri mjii
style Edison Phonographs, with all the
new improvments, at the very rocJc
bottom price alxmt one-fourth yea.
W1IC-IUUIMI HIV. SIJl.U Ul IlliUIIUi 1 11 J I UK.
finMp
$2 A MONTH
TO KEEP IT!
Anrl. Willi f arrtincr triJ c.im rrvlr
I""-' "- . TT""
Muuuiu sine, wc win iui yuu nave nvu
easiest moniiuy payments irom.uu
to $4.00 a month, or more. We want
everyone to have a new style Edison
Phonograph in the home, and wc figure
that $2.00 or $3.00 or $4.00 a month is
so easily saved, so easily spared, that
I Tr inin .trill .a.,A4 tlt.r, viAn. llAftfiH
iivs iiKiii nin ikiuov, una jitdi uiy;d3.ij
Qwf great blessing) to his family.
NO CASH DISCOUNT!
Wc are, of course, selling hundreds and
hundreds of phonograph to those who pre
fer to pay cash. And -wo want these people to
uuy uju. uui, i'uvjdk mauc mo very rocK
bottom price to all. wo are positively unable
to allow any further discount for spot cash;
so please don't ask It.
Ntw-Getthe New Edison LFtfE
We will send you our handsome new Edison
book and full particulars of our wonderful
rAA lu.. ..u a ...lii. &. ...u m.... sf j .a
..w ivan uitif iimiuivi, irw B,IU IXTLruKJ. a vll
aboutd aee our irrand new Edison hook. It will give
yoa the lit or tha thousand of record and tba
machines that yoa have to ebooao from. Writa to
daydo not delay.
Iut;ffl fhft ftfunvw f1-
-"-----"""- - i-"" i or u coupon wiu
catalog tbonld be vent to P. K. DaUon, Vita
President and General Maoagcr.
5038 EDISON BLOCK, CHICAGO
FREE COUPON
What fa yoor name?
What la yoor addreaaT.
TJe either pen or pencil. No letter fa neceaaary
tha coupon will do. Mali to TJabatn llros., and ad-
UrCH irrrwTIBII IV i't A DWAUM, VKPrr(9iDHlUnif
Men 53gedion Blk., Chicago, lln will send too,
free ana without any otrgattena oh yu of any kind.
record and toll explanation of tha Roca-Bottora
aTicc, CJtMj njrocDi sou crco inai user, oca am
coopon looay now.
without any one man.
t.
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