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The Commoner.
JUNE 23, 1911
13
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can Rrina your own aicai.
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rifiiiurv iiniinp -yiiiti n ni i i ir
WUlVaj f ftUk VllMIt I IIIIIIL1 L 1
jruu iiuyu LiuBiiiui irubus vj.wrrujguk
A lUf'UlUt UUUUD VUVJT
and quick boars
a uiouxne.
Black Hawk
Grist Mill
Write for Frco Hook.
Agents wanted.
A. If. PATCH, (Inc.)
blarkavllle, Tenn.
Alio laUu UUck XUwk
CccaBhUrs.
The Guaranty
State Bank,
Muskogee, Oklahoma,
offers to their customers and readers of this paper
throughout the country exceptional facilities for
handling accounts hy mall. The Depositors Guar
anty Fund of tho state of Oklahoma Insures absolute
safety of all funds doposlted with us. Wo bcliovo
In tho Integrity and conservatism of our officers,
tout you nro not compelled to rely on tills. What
protection do you pet from your homo bank? Wrlto
for booklet to-day. Interest paid on Time Deposits
and Savings Accounts.
If. Q. HASKELL, Vlco President
M. O. SELLS, Cahlors.
niUnrn Attachment with Corn Harvester cuts
DHlUCn and' throws In plies on harvester or
-wJnrows. Man and horso cuts and shocks equal
with a Com Binder. Sold In every state. Trice $20
with Attachment. S. C. MONTGOMERY, orToxa
llne, Tex., writes: "Tho harvester has proven all
you claim for It. With tho assistance or ono man
cut and bound over 100 acres of Corn, Kaffir Corn
and .Matzo last year." Testimonials and catalog
frco, Bliowlnp pictures of harvester.
NEW FKOOKS8 MFG. CO., SAUNA-, Kan.
Free To Boys
I Have a Glove, Mitt, Mask, Ball, Bat,
Cap and Belt for Every J3oy
Who Will Write to Me.
liiliiiwi ! nM minhi ir
rtPioaor(t;
Afaupm? J
8mLLff.
Louis and Ruth
I've got a brand-now daughter now,
And proud I am of her;
Although it rather seems, somehow,
As if sho really wero
A sign that I am growing old,
That many years havo sped;
That oft tho bells dead years havo
tolled
The "Biggest Boy" ha3 wed.
It seems that only yesterday
I wound his wounded too
With yarn in the old-fashioned
way
Twas really years ago!
It seems but just a day or two
Since off to school he ran;
But "Biggest Boy" now looms to
view
As a new married man.
Gee whiz! How Tempus fugits by
I've got a daughter-in-law!
It seems so short a time since I
Was playing "Boston taw;"
So brief a time since, free and glad,
I'd gaily romp and run
And now to think that I'm the Dad
Of a big married son!
Well, I admit my shadow turns
And points the eastward way;
That memory's incense sweetly burns
To many a yesterday.
But, praise the Lord, although the
gray
In my hair has a start,
I can with truth, stand up and say
I'm keeping young of heart.
So, daughter, you've a welcome here
Like blooming flowers of May;
To us you'll be both near and dear
Forever and a day.
But I'll admit it seems quite queer,
When all is done and said,
That I've a brand-new daughter here
'Cause "Biggest Boy" is wed.
There aro seven splendid pieces In this great out
fit. Tho ash bat Is a good ono. Tho mask Is mado
or heavy wire, full size. Tho catcher's mitt Is
thckly padded", very heavy and has patented
fastener. Tho glovo Is of tanned leathor and has
patent clasp. Tho ball Is strongly stitched and wlu
last. A neat, adjustable belt and a dandy cap
comnloto thii great outfit. Itomember you got tho
wholooutntor Bovon pieces for a HtUo easy work.
Wrlto mo to-day and I will tcU you Just how to
got It.
A M. PIPER, 220 Popular Bldg.,
Des Moines, Iowa.
Swallowing Land
When I was a lad, living only a
few miles from the 'Missouri river,
I used to watch that stream during
tho spring floods to see i' eating
away the land onjeither side. I have
seen whole farms disappear in an
hour. One night a party of us boys
were camping out near the old river.
We went to sleep on the east bank
of the stream and woke up on the
west bank. During the night the
river had cut across a low place east
of us and changed its channel. In
doing so it had swallowed up hun
dreds of acres of land, deposited two
or three feet of sand on hundreds of
other acres, and made citizens of
Missouri over into citizens of Kansas.
As I started out to say, I used to
think the old Missouri could swallow
land at a greater rate than any other
institution. But now comes my
good friend Senator W. R. Patrick
of Sarpy county, Nebraska, with a
story of a land swallower that has
the Missouri river backed off the
boards and yelling for help.
An acre of land contains 43,560
square feet. At $43.56 an acre that
is just 1 mill per square foot. Then
my friend Patrick proceeds to figure
that every time a man pays 15 cents
for a drink of boozo, and that is the
standard price, he is swallowing a
150-foot strawberry patch. If you
invite four friends to drink with you
the five swallow a 750-foot garden
patch. An ordinary spree will swal
low a good-sized pasture. If you
are a "moderate drinker," and con
sume only three drinks a day you
swallow 3,150 squaro feet of land
per day, or 164,250 square feet of
land per year. That means that you
havo swallowed In a year a bit over
thirty-seven acres of good land In
the last ton years. Now stop and
figure out how many acres of land
old King Boozo is swallowing every
year in this country of ours, and
you'll realize that as a land swal
lower the Missouri river is in tho
amateur class.
I'm reminded of tho story of tho
man who went to a doctor and said:
"Doctor, look nt my throat."
Tho doctor did so and said: "I
see a very badly inflamed condition,
sir."
"I should think you would!" said
the man. "I've sent 360 acres of
good land, fifty head of cattle, four
spans of horses, a good house and
barn and a lot of outbuildings down
that throat In the last three years."
tlon didn't foazo him nor tho Little
Woman. Not a bit of It! Wasn't tho
world an oyster ready for tholr open
ing? Sure! And If that oyster
hasn't yet opened to tho limit, at
least It has oponod up onough to
keep things going at a fairly satis
factory rato. And while thcro aro
somo hours and somo days of thoso
vanished years we wouldn't llko to
llvo over again, wo wouldn't sell for
much gold tho memory of a singlo
one of them. It hasn't been all sun
shino by any means. Somo of tho
days were woefully cloudy. A couplo
of littlo mounds In God's aero testify
to that. But wo havo tho sweet
memory of tho two littlo ones who
wore with us for a while.
Well, woll! Hero wo aro, maun
dering away about something that
Interests no ono but ourselves. But
when a man's Biggest Boy gets mar
ried, and ho happens to bo tho first
of tho flock to do it, that man Is
qulto likely to want to tell all
about it.
A Family Affair
Married, at home of tho bride's
mother, on Saturday, Juno 10, 1911,
Mr. Louis Blaine Maupin and Miss
Ruth Rosa. Immediately after the
ceremony the bridal couple took the
train for Baggs, Wyo., where tho
groom has already prepared tho
home nest and where they will reside
in future.
Just twenty-three years ago next
November he, who is now -the "big
gest boy," made his appearance in a
little cottage in Fairfield, Neb. It
doesn't seem that long to the Archi
tect that is, not until ho takes a
surreptitious peep Into the glass and
sees a lot of gray hairs and a' net
work of wrinkles. The Architect has
had about as many experiences as
the average man, but this is the first
time ho stood around and saw one of
his own children "jump tho broom
stick." It's a peculiar sensation,
isn't It, you gray-haired boys and
girls who have children and grand
children of your own? Now, if the
"biggest boy" has captured as big a
prize as his Dad captured when he
trapped tho Littlo Woman and I
believe he has ho is going to dis
cover mighty quick that he hasn't
been living up to date just merely
existing. How I could write into
word the feelings that swept across
my heaTt when I saw the Biggest Boy
stand up and vow to love and cherish
the charming girl who had given into
his keeping her future life. A flood
of memories swept over me. I saw
in my mind's eye a little cot
tage away back there in '88;
I recalled the joy that swept over
me when I heard the first walling
cry; I saw him develop from Infancy
into sturdy boyhood, and from sturdy
boyhood into stalwart youth. I re
called tho fishing trips we have had
together, the many days when wo
roamed the' woods more like school
boys chums than father and son. I
recalled one anxious night when two
of us watched over his bed, fearing
every minute that the angel of death
would touch him, and I remember
how those two watchers knelt down
while the Littlo Woman voiced the
thanks of both of us that he had
been spared. I tell you, a father can
think of a wonderful lot of things
during the few minutes that it takes
a pastor to marry the Biggest Boy
to the girl of his choice.
Well, the Biggest Boy has a whole
lot more to start married life on than
his Dad had. Dad didn't have
enough money to flag a bread wagon,
and he happened just at that time
to bo out of ft job. But this sltua-
Sometliing Similar
"On the square now, old man; did
you over buy a gold brick?"
"No I never did. But I'll tell you
what I did do onco. I voted tho
democratic ticket In order to get
wool on tho frco list."
Brain Leaks
Money will purchase truckling, but
never loyalty.
Thoso of us who do not need a
balance-wheel noed an accelerator.
You can never make a suffering
man believe that any woman feolg
as cool as she always looks this kind
of weather.
Talk about the "good old days!"
Just remember, Mr. Office Man, that
your grandfather couldn't work
under the inspiration of an electric
fan.
If you aro built right something
comes along to cheer you up just
about tho time you have made up
your mind that the world Is going
to tho demnltion bowwows.
We always havo a suspicion that
tho man who wears a full beard has
a weak chin to conceal. This, how
over, may bo due to the fact that our
own whiskers aro a bit thin on tho
chin.
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TO MY MANY FRIENDS
I say "To my many friends,"
for the reason that I have on
hand ample evidence that
they arc many. I recently
announced that I would get
out an edition of my verses
if enough friends signified a
desire to own copies to war
rant mo in undertaking the
expense. Tho response has
been so hearty and so kindly
that the edition is already
assured. I am now getting
the copy ready. I am going
to take time to get this book
out in proper shape. When
it is ready for delivery I will
notify you. Im tho meantime,
if you havo not already
ordered "Kiddles Six," send
in. your order. I am not go
ing to take chances on hav
ing so many unsold copies
left on hand that I will lose
money by tho publication
thereof. It takes too much
hustling to feed and clothe
a big hunch of growing kid
dies like mine to take any
long chances. Order tho book
now and send mo the dollar
when I notify yon the book is
ready for delivery. Sincerely
and thankfully yours,
WILL M. MAUPIN.
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