The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923, April 08, 1910, Page 12, Image 12

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The Commoner.
VOLUME 10, NUMBER 1J
dome on. Boys
Reminder
"What's the string around the
thumb for, Wilkins?"
"Just to remind me that my wire
didn't tell mo' to bring homo some
thing this evening."
"Maid of Athens, ere we part,
Give, O give, me back my heart."
Lord Byron.
Maid of Lincoln, coy, serene,
Tell me natural or blondine.
12
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April
Tho litLlo buda begin to swell,
Tho grass 1b showing green;
Tho unlocked rills nro flowing on
With rippling, silvery sheen.
The chickens scratch my garden plot
Dosplto tho clod's I've flung,
And by these Bigns I'm confldont
That spring's been sprung.
Tho burning hoopsklrt taints tho air,
Tho dust clouds sail on high;
And from somo hiding placo un
known Now comes the noisome fly.
I'vo got to boat a lot of rugs
Upon tho clotheslino hung,
And by thoso signs I know full well
That spring's been sprung.
My bottor half has got a cloth
Tied tight around her head;
Tho bodclothos and tho furniture
Aro In tho back yard spread.
Tho mollis sho gots aro mighty scant
Although sho knows I'm hung
Ity as a boar and thus I know
That spring's been sprung.
coin after having visited northwest
ern Nebraska. There had been a
heavy rain tho night before, and
Prof. Condra noted with regret now
tho soil had been waBbed into tho
draws from many fields.
"Lord, what a waste, he ex
claimed, looking back from tho car
window and facing tho governor.
"Young man!" exclaimed a 300
pound woman sitting across tho aisle,
"such personal remarks aro very un
becoming and very ungontlemaniy.
Next!
"Man wants but llttlo.horo below,"
Thus saith an ancient song;
There's ono sad thing about it,
though,
Ho gets that little wrong.
Chicago Record-Herald.
And if ho gets that little right
He's such a pesky kind
That having nothing more in sight
Destroys his peace of mind.
Birmingham Age-Herald.
La Follette's Weekly Magazine.
A Journal for THE HOME, and for those WHO THINK. An aggrwslvo advocate of ItfUmt.
bu.kiess, of clean government In tho Interest of tho common good, of tho ennobling of farm life, of better
conditions for worklngmen, and of social upllftmont. . M-M Mf wumm
A PUBLICATION THAT WILL NOT MINCE WORDS OR SUPPRESS FACTS, WHEN
PUBUC WELFARE DEMANDS PLAIN TALK, ABOUT PUBLIC MEN, LEGISLATIVE
MEASURES, OR SOCIAL AND INDUSTRIAL WRONGS.
SPECIAL COMBINATION OFFER:
JSeflTKtor Prlcet JBotH i. yeart
JU Follette Weekly Magaxine. J.gg $XSS
The Commoner
This Combination-Offer holds good for new, ronowal or paid In advance subscriptions.
Address all orders to THE COMMONER, LINCOLN, NEB.
L
Information Wanted
It is something that has been puz
zling us for somothlng llko forty
two or throo years, and If thoro is
anyono who can holp us out wo
would bo grateful for his assistance.
Perhaps you havo often noticed
tho samo thing. When spring comes
and you start out to mako garden,
did you ovor notice that overy spado
full of dirt you turn up discloses
from four to a dozen big, fat, juicy
angloworms tho kind that bull
heads lovo to grab for and channel
cat and porch and bass jump for
with greedy appetites?
It scorns then as if all tho anglo
worms in tho world had emigrated
to your garden.
But when the Ashing season opens
and you grab that samo spado and
hlo into that samo garden patch for
tho purpose of digging a can of
worms for bait, you havo to spado
until your back aches and your hands
aro blistered boforo you manage to
gather in a about a dozen measoly
little worms that a self-respecting
fish would turn up its nose at If it
had a nose unless It chanced to bo
awfully hungry.
We havo noticed this overy spring
for two score years, and now we aro
more than ever anxious for an explanation.
"Man wants but little here below,"
As ho makes his little march.
Ho tries to grab the sugar, though,
When tho trust hands out tho
starch.
, St. Louis Times.
"Man wants but little hero below,"
A little for a while;
For littlo shake-downs here and
thero
In time make quite a pile.
t Philadelphia Telegraph.
"Man wants but little here below,"
nut wants it o or ana o'er;
And every time it's given him
He wants a little more.
Kansas City Post.
"Man wants but little here below,"
And this I take with grace,
For just a little dope like this
Will nil a lot of space.
Concerning Uncle Joe
The way tho "Insurgents" licked
Uncle Joe Cannon tho other day re
minds mo of tho way Artemus Ward
got tho bettor of his antagonist.
First Artemus jammed his eye
right over tho other fellow's finger.
Then, to mako it more effective
ho stuck his thumb in the other fel
low's mouth.
And as a final stroke he plumped
his stomach up against tho other
fellow's kneo.
That's the way Artemus whipped
his antagonist.
Isn't that sort o' familiar?
Sarcastic
"I think the new minister's wife
Is just too mean for anything."
"What makes you think so?"
"Sho called tho other day while
I was tryiuc to find a hutton to
match thom on my husband's coat,
and sho said, 'Perhaps I kin help
tmtt
JUU.
"Why, I think that was kind of
her."
"Yes, but she pulled a dozen or
more buttons out of her handbag
and mighty soon found one just like
them on his coat. Then she kinder
smiled and went to talkin' about
somethin' else."
Too Personal
Professor Condra of the Univer
sity of Nebraska knows more .about
the goology and soil formation of
Nebraska than any other living man.
And he Is something of a crank on
tho matter of soil saving, which
leads him to talk in season and out
of season about '"erosion" and all
that sort of thing.
About a year ago he and Governor
Shallenborger were traveling togeth
er on a train, coming back to Lln-
Great Scheme
Wo pondered over the problem for
a long time. Finally we reached the
solution.
We simply made our neighbor's
hens believe that we had bought
them. Now they scratch up his gar
den instead of ours.
Maybe we can raise a couple of
messes of gaTden truck before the
poultry discovers what a cheat and
a swindler we are.
These Patent CLAav,c pOA
steel Tension onears rree
With Each Yearly Subscription to The American Homestead
at the Regular Yearly Subscription Price, 50 Cents.
To get you acquainted with our biff farm and household paper, wo are mak
ing thlB very extraordinary offer, fully described below. The American Home
stead is published monthly by Charles W. Bryan, under a positivo guarantee
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The American Homcutend is praqtical and intensely interesting, not theoretical
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Every woman, married or single, should havo a pair of these Patent Tension
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a first-class pair of 8-inch Shears, equipped with a new and simple attachment
that keeps them always sharp and enables tho user to cut anything from wet
tissue to the heaviest cloth. These shears will not fail to please you. .
xne illustration shows tho patent ten- "
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A simple turn of tho littlo thumb-screw
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teed by the maker.
SBFnV111 P0R YOURSELF FREE
i JJJiu the cuPon below, and send at
,ce wlth y,our 'omittance of GO cents
can Hnmf? BUbscriP"on to The Ameri
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THE AMERICAN HOMESTEAD,
'LUieela,. Wefc.
II
Tho Jjaugh
"Love laughs, at locksmiths," so they
say,
And maybe it is so.
But does it laugh at tho baker man?
Nay! He has got the "dough."
Tho Difference
On election day the average citi
zen is a sovereign in his own right.
Otherwise he is only an ultimate
consumer.
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Shears aro 8 Inches long. Cut Is
not full slzo
Coupon for Free Pair of High
Grade Tension Shears
The Americas Homestead,
Ltacola, Nebraska.
enuemen: I am pleased to accept
your very liberal offer to send lie
America Homestead ono year and a
pair of your celebrated Tension Shears
without extra cost, prepaid to my ad
dress. I enclose 50 cents to pay for
tho same.
Name
P. O.
Send at once for Free Sampi Con of Tli American Homestead.
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