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The Commoner.
12
YOLU'MIf Si, NUMBER 4J
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THE LOOKOUT MAN
(The following verses were written In 1904 for the author's
little girl to recite at a Christmas celebration In the Lincoln public
schools. They were printed In The Commoner at the time, and
every year since repeated requests have come that they be repub
lished. Because of these requests which are now coming in
again and not because of any particular merit claimed for them by
the author, the verses are again republished, with the author's love
to all the boys and girls, everywhere, who are waiting and. hoping
that Santa Glaus will visit them. And may every childish hope be
filled and every little heart made glad. with, the coming of the
Christmas season.)' ,
Now listen, little children; and I'll) telli a1, story true
And better you remember, for it means; & lot to you
And all who act up naughty,, and, don't mind) their ma's andi pa's.
You'll get a'lot of presents, and a lot of Christmas cheer;.
tCFfte Lookout Man is walking when the stars begin to peep'
Tv see It' little children are in bed and fast asleep ;
And all' wfic ct up naughty,, and don't mind their ma's and pasfs;.
The; Lookout 'Mam ilr watching, and he'll tell old. Santa; Claus..
I knew a little fellow" oncewlto got real bad,, and said!
He didn't caTd for Santa Glaus;, .and wouldn't go to bed;:
And said lie didn't have to mind 0; he was awful bad: '-' , iJ
And didn't care the leastest mite in making folks' feel sadv ..." ,
But when' it came to Christinas,, he didn't get a thing,. , , '
For Santa Glaus had heard of Jiimy and not a thing he'd bring;. -
He knew that bad boy's record better -mind your ma's and! pa's?
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great care in the selection of his
neckties the wise mother begins
making inquiries with a view to as
certaining the young lady's name;.
The first shave is a Great Epoch,
in a boy's life.
We often wrongfully blame the
boy for a. father's faults:
As the father is bent so ia the
boy inclined.
Reckless
"I see by the papers this morning
that a fellow in. New York strangled
to death on a piece' of steak."
"That's what a fellow gets for
trying, new and dangerous- experiments."'
The Dear Girls
"That impudent Jack Armstrong"
actually kissed me in that dark hall
way last night."
"Yes, I know. I heard him make
a bet that he could do it, but he In
sisted on having the gas turned out
first."
veniences first, the city ambulance
3econdlyr the city hospital.
we've spent waking and worriei
hours trying; to think up a punish
ment sufficient, for- the grouch who
would have, us banish. Santa Claua,
and we confess failure. Boiling la
oil or drawing: and quartering would
he, comparatively speaking, a re
ward instead of a. punishment.
You know that old Santa Claua ia
the real thing. Deep down in your
crabbed old heart you known that
your effort to banish him is due to
your desire to hang on to your old
dollars instead of letting, them go to
make the children happy. 'Fess up
now,, isn't It the truth.?
But remember! You; know one
place where1 it will be suicide to
profess disbelief In the existence ot
the jolly old fellow we know as
Santa Claua.
Brain Leaks
Reasonable
; Mr- Roomin Flatte "Look: here-,.
ihoyr I find there is not a bit of hot
water in my bath. room. What's the
I. 'matter?"
Janitor's. Assistant "weur wnat
of it.. I heard me boss say your wife
kept you in hot. water, and when lie
went away on his Christmas, vaca
tion he told me. to economize on the
'coai: bur, s0, r. just disconnected your
pipes."
.
v,X. also knew a. little girl who1 was just awful bad.. . .. fl .
'''She' wouldn't learn her lessons; and she always got so mad ' "
If anybody told her to be still and hush her noise ." ' -Well,
she was always wishing for a lot of Christmas toys,
But when 'twas Christmas, morning:, to her wonder and. surprise .
An. empty stocking haiiKinj? in. the corner met her eves:- .
You see,, she actednaugliByfi.etter mind.-your ma's and pa's?
m. t -.- j. -n.r i''. i)T.C'-
Xlie- i-rfOOKOUt XUiXll 18'. WU.ICU-U1I
ravaacL he'll tell old Santa Glaus.
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The limit
L "Old Groucherly, manager of the-
big factory, i& the limit for mean-
in'ess."
. "Go on. with, it."
"He's given it out that he'll have
a nice Christmas present for each
,one ot his employes."
"That sounds, good to me."
"Yesj but it's; going: to Be ar print
ed card announcing: that he will re
duce wages only 15- per cent instead
ot 25" per cent as he- at first de
cided.'" :
The Lookout Mam is peeping through the windows every night,
And counting. -up the- children' who are always- acting right! ."!-'-'. -
ridfgoi'ng: off to bed at once when told it's time to gov
i ,Anat never pouting, not a Dit, or taking, clothes off slow..
He puts them in the good, book, but the bad ones In the bad .
And when he writes a'bad one, O, he looks just awful' sad."
For he knows they will get nothing better mind your ma's and pa's;
The Lookout Man is watching, and he'll tell old Santa Claus.
The worst dishonesty is honesty
!for policy's sake.
Christmas lies principally in the
.giving,, not in the gift.
The price tag never accompanies
the real Christmas gift.
And we'H be happy if Santa brings
us an extra pair of suspenders.
If you: can not give' anything else,
give, a smile: and a word of cheer.
Mighty easy to. get the children
to bed early these night. And oft
!to Sunday school.
We- know what wefd like to hand
th coat man and also what we'll
have to hand him.
If heaven; were to be won only by
achievements it would be a fright
fully lonesome place.
This postal savings bank scheme
has no interest for us at this par
ticular' time of the year.
One refornr In the currency that
we -want h-urried alonff Is the matter
of getting; your change- back in a de
partment store.
Hog killing season and we recall
the good old days of backbone, spare
,rtb and jowls:. Make your mouth
iwater,. Mr'. City Man?
Just because you: can not mane
Precaution
fhf' ntrmlr haTrfnir qflrnn.Tr fh. fhrP
Quarter hour before five the ffreat everybody hanov on Christmas is no
'trust magnate called his trusted sec-i reason why you should not try to
The- Youngest Boy
Ho's" dreaming of a hobbyhorse
And lots of pretty toys;
He's dreaming of tin trumpets and
All things that make a noise.
He's dreaming of a soldier cap,
And of a tenor drum
Andi smiling while he's waiting. "
, For Santa- Claua to come.
He's dreaming of the reindeer
That haul the Christmas sleigh;
Efe's- dreaming of the candles
That light the Christmas way."
He's dreaming of the sleighbells
That rfngadown the road,
And smiling while he's dreaming
Of Santa and his load.
Dream onr O little brother;
Ad wake on Christmasmprn,
iVflnd the horse and helmets
The toys and noisy horn.
Smile on amidst your dreaming,
And, may God grant to yoj '
A happy Christmas morning
With all your dreams come true.
Ulterior Motive
"What are you going to glveyour
husband for Christmas?"" . T
"A fountain pen and a' check
book."
retary Into his private office1 and saldr
"It is about time to close the office
, for "the day."
"Yes,, sir."
"Have all the clerks been
searched?"
"Yes,, sir."
"Has, the letter copy book been
iput Into the double-lined steel safety
vault i"
"Yes, sir."
"Have the day's notes of the sten
ographers been carefully burned?"
"Yes, sir."
"Well, if all these Important de
tails have been attended to, I guess
you might let the force oft a few
minutes before the regular time. I
want time to think a little."
imake somebody happy.
We have a. sneaking suspicion
that a, Tot of children are fooling us
into believing- that we are still fool
ing them on this Santa business.
Of course your friend who smokes
will appreciate a Christmas 'gift in
the shape of a nice pipe, but if he's
a: real smoker he will stick to the
old one until the stem Is worn off.
Our Hope
We're going fo hunt a stocking
That hasn't got a hole .
And hang. It up a hoping
Santa'll fill it full of coal.
Iiucky .
'T had a stroke of good luck yes-
"That's good! What was It?"
"I was so busy all -day I forgot
how .unlucky I usually am."
'Boy graphs,.
It's a wise boy that Insists on
wearing knickerbockers until after
Christmas.
A boy's pockets were made to keen
everything in but money.
When the boy begins exercising
A Fair Warning
We know some men who think it
the right thing to- do to go around
fwlth sanctimonious faces and strive
to destroy childish faith In the ex
istence of Santa Claus. To such, mor
ally dyspeptic and religiously gan
grened individuals we want to issue
fair warning.
We know a little cottage where
there Is a quartette ot children of
Santa Claus age four count 'em
four. They believe that Santa Claus
is a real personage, and they are
right. As long as 'they believe in
Santa Claus there is a Santa Claus.
And If any man with a sanctimo
nious face long enough to eat
oats out of a churn comes 'round
where these four children are and
undertakes to undermine that faith,
there is going to be need for a
coupie ot well known
THE LAST STRAW
The young man and the girl were
standing outside the front door, hav
In a final chat after his evening call.
He was leaning- against the do r post,
talking In low tones. Presently the
young lady looked around to dis
cover her father In the doorway, clad
In a dressing gown.
"Why, father, what in the worm
Is the matter?" she Inquired.
"John," said the father, addressing
himself "to the young man, you
know I have never complained about
your staying- late, and I am not go
ing to complain of that now, but ror
goodness sake stop leaning againsi
!-. vu in- onii To- the rest ot
r rs; i-r r: ; jfLm.- st
me kiiiuuy scu auuio
Louis Republic.
sleep.
NOT ONE MISSING
It is much, to be proud of that on
the occasion of the visit of the tieei
to Japan not only did the thousand
ot sailors who were given shore lib
erty conduct themselves well du
when Admiral Sperry sailed avw
thpr was not a single deserter.
public con-1 Washington (D. C.) Times.
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