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About The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923 | View Entire Issue (May 20, 1904)
ifllfW&IIW&sp The Commoner, 10 VQLUME 4, NUMBER 18, a. . m M rf -j $ jUT Ism ffl Vi. vv, cva Vsmr Z.s er pwajj IMgupitfryj ?zry- Ask Thorn. There tiro issues of tariff, but I must declare, if You ask how I stand on the caso, In a judge's dominion on spoken opin ion Is right in. political caso. So I'm as still as the tomb and alone in my gloom, And if my position you'd know, .You must take up the task and all questions ask Of 'August and David and Joe. t As, for trusts well, you see, it don't become me. A judge on the bench, to make talk. I've got my own views, but you'll have to excuse If at telling 'em I buck and balk. I'm tongue-tied and mute that's be yond all dispute. I'm not running just taking a jog. And to all who ask mo 1 just tell 'em to see Either Joseph or David or Aug. Aud if by a chance you should speak of finance I'll have to close up like a' clam. But I don't hesitate at this moment to state I'm a democrat, "still," so I am! Finance is a theme, which to me doesn't soem At this present time to be grave Bui'mind what I say, I'll refe- you to day To August and Joseph and Dave. everything ho lias to buy. Ho sells his wheat in the open market agairist the competition of East Indians who can live on 3 cents a day and save money. He pays the gold price for his lalKr and sells it in competition with tho 1 products of labor paid for in silver that has been depreciated at his ex pense. And he shouts for expansion that means tho opening of another country that will go to raising stuff to compete with tho products of his toil. Then, when the victory' is won, the farmer whoops it up and rejoices be cause ho has elected the advocate of protection. He throws into the air a hat taxed 40 per cent. Ho dancos un til he wears the soles off of his sweat shop shoes, taxed 60 per cent. '"Hah f'r protection!" " 'Rah for 'sound money'!" "'Rah for expansion!" And Mr. Candidate, smiling a know ing smile, propares to draw a fat salary. Then the trusts go right on with their graft. How It is Doric. Tho horny handed son of toil stopped the team in the middle of the furrow to shake hands with the can didate. "Pino weather for plowing," re marked tho candidate. "Purtv eood " ronlied tho farmer. "I love to meet tne farmers in the fields," said the candidate. "I love to smell the freshly turned soil; to see tho sleek horses, and to think of the abundant "crops that are sure to fol low." "Y-e-s," drawled "the farmer. "The farmer is the man who feeds us all," continued tho candidate. "What would tho world be without the farmer? It would be a wilder ness. He furnishes everything. He is the base upon which tho nation rests." "Y-e-s," said the farmer. "Indeed he is. I am a candidate for county recorder, and I'd like to have your vote. I'd rather be defeated with the farmer vote in my favor than to win without it. That's the way I love tho farmer." "What do you stand for?" queried tho farmer. "I am for protection to American industry, for sound money and for expansion. Of course you are, too. Protection prevents pauper wheat from coming in competition with your wheat. Sound money or gold, bright yellow gold moans one hundred cents in every dollar, and expansion means opening newer fields for the marketing of your produce." And thus the siren song was sung A great many farmers believed it' They vote for all those things. ! And they get it1 Where? ! ' ' oou know' where Cora wears her The farmer blithely votes for pro tection to American Industry; and ma lrom 20 to 100 per cent more for A St. Louis Housowifo's Lo.rn.oat. They are coming by the dozens Brothers, sisters, uncles, cousins To the fair. They have written notes so tender, .Tolling how each loving sender Will prepare To pay a visit long belated To the loved ones thus related And forgot Till they, good and free board craving, Thought It would be quite a saving If the lot Paid a "visit" to St. Louis, For they felt a visit due us, S'o you see, They to viBlt lis are willing, Thus two birds with one stone killing, Easily. From the confines of the nation; From the bounds of all creation, uvery oay, Trunks are packed and dresses fin ished, Write they, with love undiminished So to say "Don't fix up a bit; don't worry; We'll be there two weeks; don't hurrv Not a thing. J Long this call we've been intending But we thought we could be spending During, spring, Some week's at the exposition Having time at disposition." inis and more. And they're coming, cousins, brothers Uncles, nieces, aunts and others By tho score. ' And tho worry don't diminish, And I clearly see my finish Long 'fore fall. I'll be driven to distraction, And the fair'll be no attraction None at all. Night and morn will I be halting, Wash ng dishes or bread making Ah, the woe! Relatives I never heard of Never saw and heard no word of visits owe. ' ?PJat.lei8t they say UlQy owo it And right now they will bestow it, So prepare. ' wl? i11!"10, when each ne knew it Would be just the time to viewlt View the fair. ' Costly CommynleMin When Judin w t. o.i. . Neb., was making his se ondace for congress as the fusion nomtaS In the Fourth district, he held a great meetiner nf Wnimn ' ,. :i ll Breat I runniul high ana th. cro7dTa?,a enough to spur Judge Stark to his best efforts. After dwelling at length upon the subject of imperialism and criticising the republican colonial policy. Judge Stark began showing how expensive imperialism Is In dollars and cents. One of his most interested auditors was Pat Sheean, a rock-ribbed Irish democrat who, although quite deaf, never missed a democratic rally. Fat occunied a front seat and leaned for ward with his hand behind his ear. to catch every word that the spealier uttered. "Tho one item of cabling alone," said Judge Stark, "amounted to $360, 711.59 for the year ending on Septem ber 15. Just think of it, friends over one-third of a million for cabling between here and the Philippines!" "Phwat's thot?" queried Pat, who had not quite caught the remark. x atliu mat ik tuoi ua uiuid luuu one-third .of a million dollars to talk to the Philippines last year," repeated Judge Stark. "Thot much for talkin' wid th' Phil lypeens?" asked Pat, "Yes, sir; that's what it cost, Mr. Sheean." "Shure," said Pat, "talkin' is grow jn' thot expinsive thot I'll keep me mouth shut afther this." WhoLt Is It? "I was much interested In .the ac count of Japanese rejoicings at To-ki-o." "Yes, I presume the Japs painted To-ke-o red." "Say, you fellows make me tired. What's the use of wasting time read ing stuff from Tok-i-of" "That's what I say. I always skip the Tok-e-o date line." Tho Graduate ' Erect and proud he stands and looks The whole wild world about. He's laid aside, his dingy books And is prepared to rout The fogy notions, musty dim v The earth so long, has had. He's green, but still we're proud of him The optimistic grad. Hardly. "Did you take in the Louisiana Pur chase, exposition?" "Well," replied the man, jingling three pennies and a souvenir medal I doubt if the exposition was taken in. for "the Christian who gets tired of moving straight ahead. The pleasure of doing increases tho pleasure of being. When Doubt opens the door-. Faith prepares to move out. Wo become accustomed- to tho thought of big sins by compromising with the. little ones. John Barleycorn is a long fighter The longer you fight with him the stronger he becomes. When a fellow is in trouble he gets cold comfort from tho friends who give him nothing but "hot air." The average man finds it easy to dig up a dozen excuses for neglecting duty, when the reason lor doing it is close at hand. Cinch. "Went broke? Why, I thought you were .betting on a sure thing." "I did." broker hW CmeS lt that you went suretWng? thens'end of the ' Lucky. "There goes the luckiest man in St Louis," remarked the old resident nr the exposition city. Iesent of ;;Lucky! He don't look it." h wh Is- He hasn't got a rela tion m the worldoutsiae of St. fouls'' Hirsute. Who WK '"Monroe Ever, iornlnTat Tl He stroked the down lino And moored, "0, pshaW aIn,t t "State" or "States." It would be n poor tribute to Dave Hill's characteristic shiftiness if ho had. drawn a platform or a plank in one so candidly, bo .succinctly ex pressed, so lucidly stated that there could be no doubt of its meaning. Be cause David's methods appear in that New York platform, our skillful con temporary, the Globe, is put to its ex egetic stumps to explain that it does not mean what its words imply. If it does not mean that corporations chartered by the state should be reg ulated by the state that creates it, hut means that they should be controlled and regulated by the forty-five states incarnated in the United States, then the Globe casts a severe reflection upon the ability of the draftsman of that plank to write intelligibly. The severity of the task laid upon our -contemporary is farther shown by its argument that, as the constitu tion vests in congress power over commerce "between the states," it vests power in the United States as ."the state," and, therefore, when the New York platform speaks of "the state" It means the United States. The missing link in this chain of ar gument is the language of the con stitution, which so clearly recognizes the difference between "the state" and the "states." Had it been the thought of the framers that "the state" meant the United States they would have shortened the grant of '.power to one of a simple grant to regulate com merce in the United States. There is more bother over the matter, how ever, than it is worth. It only serves to show the disadvantage of ambig uity in platform declarations, and also Hill's artfulness in-beclouding pur pose with words. St. Pa;ul Pioneer-Press. at Genwliiin.'tnn .. t,. with BifiinsTHa she lost L, matter in speculations'" l Ilis mone1 y "is nousecreaning time face." tt . D"ain Leaks. ..f the da? SSer. lng flrst maM Satan is always finding "short cuts" Brazen Effrontery. If Grover Cleveland had any sense of shame he would not revive a scan dal that eternally damned his admin istration,' with the American people and made it a stench' in tho nostril3 of public decency. Instead, with as sumed gaiety, he assures his audience that "without shame and without re pentance I confess my share of tho guilt; and I refuse fp shield my ac complices, in "this crime, who, with me, held high place$ in that adminis tration. And though Mr. Morgan and Mr. Belmont and scores of other bankers and financiers -who were ac cessories in' those transactions may bo steeped In destructive propensities, I shall always recalwith satisfaction and self-congratulation 'myi 'collusion with' them at a iiinq 'wh,en our coun-; try sorely needed their aid," SWhen tho historian?- comes- to pass final judgment uppV)$e transactions; ikwlll be diffloultQorrhim to deter-nWne- which deserT'eV1' "the greatest CefUKlirn tho rnM nnnn h rVQUBUlJ b&'the MoTgan syndicate and iw offi cial abetorfr or thrajeePPfS of Grover- CleWaSfJVfilwaukeo News. v ,