j t i 8 The Commoner. 500,000 Rheumatic Agents Wanted Quick, Millions H&ve Rheumatism and All Can be Cured Write To-day if You Have Rheumatism or Want to Act asAgent, h- 50c. Box ailed Free. The Home Department. It is now poasiblo to bo quickly cured of any form of rheumatism without having your stom ach turned up sido down or being half choodto death and raado to vomit, and evory sufferer from rheumatism should wolcomo this now and marvolous discovory with opon arms and give it an honost trial. John A. Smith, Milwaukee, Wis., whilo apparently hopolossly sick with rhoumatism, hit upon a combination of drugs and is genoroua enough to sond a 50 cent box froo to ovory sufforor who writes at onco. It is 'a homo treatment and will not koop you from your work. As you know if you'vo tried them, ovory bo oallod rheumatic romedyon tho markot to-day, except this gonuino euro, will causo you violont stomach pains and vomiting, and somo of thou aro so dangoroua tlioy will causo hoart trouble And tho worst of it is they novor euro. Whon a porson" has rhoumatism the constitution is so run down that ho should bo vary careful what ho puts into his stomach. It tho.roforo gives mo ploasuro to present a remedy that will euro ovory form and variety of rhoumatism without ono single- unpleasant feoling. That romody is "GLORIA TONIC." Before I docidod to toll tho world about tho discovery of "Qlori a Tonic" I hod ittried on hos pital and sanitarium patients with perfect sue ess. But somo pcoplo novor will boliovo any thing Until tlioy know"it fromoxporience, so tho bost and quickest way is for you to writo mo that you want to bo cured and I will sond you a trial box of "Gloria Tonic" froe of cost. No matter what your form of rhoumatism is-acuto,chronio, muscular, Inflammatory, doformant, sciatic.nou ralgic, gout, lumbago, otc, "Gloria Tonic" will urely euro you. Do not mind if other remedios have failed you, nor mind if doctors say you aro incurable. Mind no ono but writo to mo to-day sure. "Gloria Tonic" will stop thosofchos and rains, thoso inflammations and deformities and euro you so that life will again be worth living. This oilor is not for curiosity sookors but is made to rheumatics only. To them I will Bond "Gloria Tonic" froe. Novor boforo has a romody been so highly on dorsod as "Gloria Tonic." Among tho eminent people who rocommond its properties and say it will positively euro rhoumatism is DR. QUINTERO, of tho University of Von- ezuola, whoso endorsement of Gloria Tonic boars tho official seal of tho United Statos Consulate. THE HEALTH DEPARTMENT of Lnn. don, England, prior to sending it into that country mado a thorough investigation of its ingredients with the result that it is admit ted without any restriction, thus It oannot contain poisons or worthless drugs. A MEDICAL JOURNAL writos: Gloria Tonic posbossos all tho qualities dosirod by Dr. Hal g to alter tho uric acid nnd thus croato a now epoch in tho practico of medicine, honco Gloria Tonic should recoivo recogni tion, from tho modical profession and health journals throughout tho United Statos. If you are a sufforor send your namo today and by return mail you will recoivo a regular 60 cent box of "Gloria Tonic" and also tho most elaborato book ovor gotten up on tho subject of Rheumatism, absolutely froo. It t ill toll you all about your caso. You got a 50 cont box of "Gloria Tonic" and this wonderful book at tho same time, both froo, so lot me hoar from you at onco and soon you will bo cured. Address, JOHN A. SMITH, 2011 Gormania Bldg., Milwaukee Wi., U. S. A. Agents Wanted Men and women are making thousands of dol lars and doing a world of good introducing this marvolous remedy throughout tho country. Don't full to writo Mr. Snith today whothor you have rhouraatidm or not, for a froo 50 cont box and full particulars. The Old Arm Chair. I lovo It, I love It; and who shall daro To chide me for loving that old arm chair? I've treasured it long as a sainted prize; I've bedewed it with tears, and em balmed, it with sighs. 'Tis bound by a thousand bands to ray heart; Not a tie will break, not a link will start. Would ye learn tho spell? a mother sat there; And a sacred thing is that old armchair. In childhood's hour I lingered near Tho hallowed seat with listening ear; And gentle words that mother would give To fit me to die, and teach me to live. She told me shame would never, be tide, With truth for my creed and God for my guide; She taught me to lisp my earliest prayer, As I knelt beside that old arm-chair. I sat and watched her many a day, When her eye grew dim, and her locks grew gray; And I almost worshiped her when she smiled, And turned from her Bible to bless her child. Years rolled on; but the last one sped, My idol was shattered, my earth-star fled; I learned how much the heart can bear, When I saw her die in that old arm chair. 'Tis past, 'tis past; but I gaze on it now With quivering breath and throbbing brow; 'Twas there she nursed me; 'twas there4she died; And memory flows with lava tide. Say it is folly, and deem me weak, While 'the scalding drops start down my cheek; But I love it, I love it, and cannot tear My soul from a mother's old arm chair. -Eliza Cook. only knows how we did manage to live until a job hove in sight and per mitted me to capture it. But right here is where some more of Dorothy's bright ideas came into play, and her rosy optimism made our frugal fare during those dark days taste like feasts that old Lucullus gave to his friends. When the job came I stuck to it, and as time went on the matter of tak ing a bridal tour lapsed. But it was not forgotten. Dorothy's brain con ceived a brilliant idea and harbored it for five short and happy years. About a week before the fifth anniver sary of our marriage Dorothy sprung her scheme. It was at the supper table. Poising her fork in midair she suddenly said; "Will, suppose we go on our bridal tour, starting on our fifth anniver sary." "Wh-wh-what!" I gasped, looking over at the golden-haired girl whose two years of existence on this mundane sphere permitted her to occupy a seat at the table. "That's what I said," replied Dor- otny. "Suppose we take our bridal tour, starting on our fifth- anniversary. uiuugui it uu oui. in iact, l ve I've 7 nfl AIXY AVERAGE soiling easy IiUU Pump Governors. They mako tho hardest working pump work easy. Windmills turn in tho lightost wind, Fits all pumps. Ex clusive torrltnry. N talk morit soils It. Pump Governor Co. 23T S. Canal 8t. Chicagojll. DO YOUR KIDNEYS PAIN YOUAaow and wonderful discovory $0 days troatment and book free. Dr. Lo Roy Modicino Co,, Evunsvillo, lud. & A BELATED BRIDAL TOUR. " I frankly confess that the idea was Dorothy's. As a matter of fact, a vast majority of the good ideas advanced in our household come ,fr,om.her. I do not make the confession as a matter of self-abnegation, nor as a tribute to her. It is all so plain to those who know both of us that any effort I might make to arrogate to myself the credit for the bright ideas regarding our household arrangements would be greeted with derision. When we were married circum stances over which we had no control prevented us from taking a bridal tour. In tho first place, we eloped. In the second place we kept our mar riage secret more than three weeks, and before it leaked out I had lost my job. There we wore a newly married couple with nothing between us and privation save my small ability as a newspaper man, and almighty small demand for that little ability during the strenuous times of '94 when busi ness was more a memory than a fact. Even if we had been the possessors of enough money to take a bridal tour wo would not have taken It. We would have used It to live on until I secured a situation. As It was, heaven iiilnh fill A Combination or Drams, experience and high grade material lias made the RELIABLE Incubator known thrniichnnt tlin niu.v,i world. If you aro after results represented In dollars and cents, you want ono of our popular 20th Cch tury Poultry Book. Bright, instructive and worth ten times the price asked. Snt for 10c. As full of mejtaa an egg. Hellabls Incubator & Brooder Co., Box B-7 Qulncy.llls. fllllllBM53il lHPV You are a chump to work for othrTJ. BE Y0U110WN DOSS. Start, a MAIL ORDER tnui. neii t jour own home In any town; we foil tou haw nil Am. 4n mm. Inn for you, furntih itatlonrry, catalogue, circular!, eta., and everything r quired, on credit ProflU limncnie. 326.00 to SSO.00 per week. Particular!, catalogue and whoteaale price list free. Chicago Specially Co. 184 Chicago, 111. Van Duren S"., M RN"- km tht utiei no l u'e lime Jo take up the work. "-'-"'1 We leach li In two raoolbl, present toolj, allow Saturday wage. irant diploma and guarantee poaltloni when competent from 112 to fl& weekly. No trade offer! better Inducement, Write nearest branch, Molor Barber College. Chicago, 111., Omaha, Nob., or St. Louis, Mo. Price list and little book froe. N. A. KNAPP, Bochostor, O. 2000 Ferrets Send us your aaarca and we will ihowyoa how to make $3 a day absolutely sure: wo won free, tou work In Send us your address and we will $ 3 a Day Sure iW furnish the work and teach y the locality where you lire. Send us vour explain the business fully, remember we guarantee a clear profit ot C3 for CYcry day's work, absolutely sure. "Write at once, KOIaJU HiKUKACTUIUfta CO., Box 70 I, Detroit, MUk, Cash forYour Real Estate no matter where it is. Send description nnd cash price and pet my successful plan for finding 'cash buyers. W. M. Ostrander, North Ameri can Bldg., Philadelphia. See my full page ads. Mtmsey's, JlfcClure's, and all the big magazines. arranged all the plans. My travelling dress is already made, I've arranged to have Rena taken care of by kind friends during our absence, and we've saved up enough, money so that we can pay all the expenses and not miss it." That seemed to settle it, but still I failed to grasp the idea. "You mean that we will celebrate our anniversary by taking a trip somewhere?" I asked. "Nothing of tho kind, sir. I mean that we will take our bridal tour. We'll invite a few friends to our wed ding supper. After it is eaten we will take a closed carriage for the depot, and as we start our friends will throw rice at us. I'll carry a big bou quet of bride roses and you'll carry a look of foolish pride, just like all new ly married men do. Our friends will follow us to the depot and act just as ridiculously as friends usually do when they see a wedded couple off on a bridal tour. We'll take the train firwi try to make folks believe we've been married ever so many years, and when we think nobody is looking we'll hold hands and look unutterable things into each other's eyes. We'll act just" "For heaven's sake pause in your mad career, woman!" I shouted. "How in thunder are we going to do all of that play acting?" "0, we'll succeed well enough, never fear," replied Dorothy. "There's no use raising objections. The whole thing is settled with the exception of our route. I thought I would allow you to have something to say about that." I have forgotten just what I wanted to say concerning this impudent meth od of doing business, but I remember that whatever it was I wisely held my peace. "Well, if you've got it all fixed but that I guess we might as well settle that part ot it," I meekly said. "When I come home tomorrow evening I'll bring a lot of railway guides and we'll look 'em over and decide where wo want to go." "0, I knew you would think my plan a good one!" exclaimed Dorothy, passing me another flaky biscuit and re-fllling my coffee cup. "You needn't mind bringing home the railway guides. I've got a lot here already, and I've been looking them over." "Woman, have you also decided where wo aro to go on our bridal (Continued on Page Nine.) CANCER! Antltoxlno Spt C1I1G UO.'S JLAIC8C Scientific Dlf- onvnrv. Trfpri in 100 selected coses of cancer without a failure. Used by any ono at homo: freo book. Address Antltoxlno Specific Co., Desk 20, Nashville, Term. TELEGRAPHY taught thoroughly. Total Unit, Tuition (telegraphy and tyr wrltlnei. hoard anl room, 0 months' course $82. Can be ie dneedoDehalf great demand for operators; school organized 1874. Catalog froe. DODUK'S INSTITUTE, Yalparalio, lad. WantedAn Ika. !852BJ8SEfc C, for prize offer, awarded monthly for bost in vention submitted. Sample copy of tho Patent Record, an illustrated journal devoted to science and industry, and List of Inventions Wantod. sont FREE. Jjtsakn Proofreading Ifyoupoiiesi a fair education why not uttllie It at a genteel and urn. crowded profusion paying 115 to $35 weekly? Bltuatloni alvaji obtainable, Wa art loo original Instructor! by mall. Home Correspondence School, Philadelphia. C224C? OOA WEEK "and Expenses, 5J I O m ww c. c r yearly contract woQk-ly pay, for men with rig to sell Poultry Mixture in tho country. Wo furnibh. bank rofor onco of our reliability. EUREKA MFG. CO.,Dopt. B, East St,Louis,Ill. PATENTS No Charge forEiarolnatloa and Opinion on Patent ability of Inventions. 1'ROMTT, RELIABLE. No bogui 'guarantee!" or "refund ichemea." Un equaled Reference. Hand Book, eta. ran. It. S. & A. B. I.ACEY Patent Attys. 3 Pacific Bldff. Eit 1809. WABIUNQTON, D. 0. r mm nn-jj. iii ii f llirfl liiliiii AND Iron Mountain Route, i KNOWN AS THE GREAT SOUTHWEST SYSTEM. Oonncotlng the Commercial Centers and Blob Farms of MISSOURI. The Broad Corn and Wheat Fields and Thriving Cities of KANSAS, Tho Fertile Blver Valleys, Trade Centers and Boiling Prairies of NEBRASKA, The Grand.Pic turosquo and Enchanting Scenery, and the Famous Mining Districts of COLORADO. The Agricultural, Fruit, Mineral and Timber Lands, and Famous Hot Springs of ARKANSAS. The Sugar Plantations and Immense Bice Fields of LOUISIANA, The Cotton and Grain Fields, the Cattle Banges and Winter Besorts of TEXAS, Historical and Scenic OLD AND NEW MEXICO, And forms with its Connections the Popular Winter Boute to CALIFORNIA For descriptivo and illustrated pamphlets of any of the above States, address Oompaules' Agents, or H. C. TOWNSEND, General Passenger and Ticket Agent, ST. LOUIS. i i