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About The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 23, 1901)
4 w HHH- H"feM-f ! 'i 1 1 1 i' H-H H llilllti IH- Whether Common or Not UH-t'H 1 8 I 1 I -H-M l-l M- H 1 I H-M"t"HH"t"fr nan, Poor Alan. Trusts in crudlcs and bottles und milk, Trusts in wool and in cotton; Trusts in needles and pins and threads- Cursed by trusts when begotten. Trusts in headgear und clothing and shoes, ' '"' ' Trusts in physio and lighting; Trusts in everything he must eat . ' Life is a strenuous fighting. .' 9, 'Taxed by the trusts while a babe In arms, "' Taxed late, early and of ten i Taxed on the comforts of youth and ugev , . , Taxed lit last in his coflln. Taxed on tho marble that marks his rest And tells the world "Hie Jacet;" This will explain why a man don't nceuV , A shroud that has a pocket. esaann Modern Definitions. Syndicate 8 und H 2 0. Trust Legalized grand larceny. Subsidy Fruition and suckcrdom. Constitution A manuscript collander. Flag Corollary of commercial asset. Patriot The man with the concession. Assimilation Synonym of grab; a mask. Duty Profitable linancial viewpoint. Moral Code Product of an elastic conscience. Aggression Refusing to be benevolently assi milated. Infant Industry A key to a public treasury. Sympathy Something that costs nothing. (Obs.) CX SS IS H3 ft A Safe Inference. "What are you reading, my son?" asked rapa Wiscboy glancing at his son and heir who was study ing a current magazine. "0, Pin reading about 'The Famous Songs of Famous Educators.' It's awful interestin'. What do you suppose is Dr. Harper's favorite? " "Well, I'm not acquainted with Dr. Harper, but I imagine that 'Retreat' is his favorite." "What makes you think that?" "Because that's the song where it says something about 'the oil of gladness on our heads.' " Baa Not a New Act. "I notice, paw,!' remarked Mrs. Cornblade as she stacked up the supper dishes, "that them scicntiiic fellers out west are disputin' about whether a rattle snake can crawl backwards into his hole. What d'ye think about it?" "I don't know much about snakes doin' the baek'ard crawlin," replied Farmer Cornblade as he laid his paper aside, "but I've jus' been readin"bout th' republican party's movements concernin' th' in come tax, th' revenoo tax, th' money question an' sympathizin' with the people struggliu' f'r liberty." Not Disinterested. As" patriot ho loved to pqse, y ..,,: - And mako long, loud professions. , Hut soon tho people "all could sec He shouted loudest just when ho Secured some now concessions. The Modern Version. "What does it mean in Ecclcsiastes where it says, 'Wisdom is good, with an inheritance?' " "That was the ancient way of shotting for the old Hag, aud an appropriation." The Twentieth Century Education.' "Good morning, gentlemen, " said Professor Twig 'eiu, mounting the rostrum of the lecture room and facing the multitude of students gathered from all parts of the earth. "I am proud to see so many, of you this morning. A ripple of applause swept over the iecture room as Professor Twiggem drew from hb Docket a roll of manuscript and adjusted his glasses. "We are here this morning, gentlemen, io The Commoner. purpose of discussing the subject of 'Industrial Com bination,' " said the professor. "We are to discuss it with reference to its effect upon free " "Pardon me, professor," interrupted the Academic Censor, "but has your manuscripts been passed upon by the manager of the Yardstick Oil Company?" "It has, sir." "And has the superintendent of the Consolidated Embalmed Beef Promotion Syndicate carefully scruti nized it?" "He did that last night, sir." "And has the third vice president of the Amalga mated Steel, Iron, Brass and Copper Company placed his oflicial '0. K.' upon your remarks?" "He has, sir." "Then, sir, may I ask if the Ancient and Acci dental Society of Possible University Donors has properly examined your manuscript?" "It has, sir. All possible interests have been con sulted and paciiicd. "Then, sir," said the Academic Censor, "here is your ticket which entitles you to proceed with your remarks." A law moments later Professor Twiggem was reading from his manuscript and the assembled students were paying as little attention as possible. 2001. "Good morning, Marcoiiius! And why this pen sive brow, this deep thought, this air of abstraction?" "Good morning, Itocksanimus: 'Tis well I met thee. Behold here an ancient papyrus of the date 1900. Note well, Ilocksanimus, that it doth mention 'free speech.' Tell me, good friend, what meanest that?" "Tut, tut, Marconius; why botherest thou thy head about such foolish research? 'Free speech? "Tis but an idle fancy entertained by those who once did flutter themselves that all men were equal. 'Twas but'the fancy of brains diseased. 'Tis well that by their scheming plans our forebears did cure the minds and rid them of the idle fancies. Come, Marconius, let us to the Street and shake the dice to see who shalt have writ and warrant to seize and take what poor deluded mortals in the fields think theirs by right of toil and struggle." W. M. M. 'Taint your oppyletts an' feathers Make the thing a grain more right; 'Taint afollcrin' your bell-wethers Will excuse ye in His sight; Kf you take a sword an' dror it, An' go stick a feller thru, Guv'mcnt aint to answer for it, God'll send the bill to you. James Rubmslv Lowkm. H-frl II I 1 I I II I I i III 1 1 I I I I 1 1 II i i" The Philippines h a 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ii i 1 1 1 1 a i h i ii i ii ii i The simple truth of the matter is that our immedi ate necessities in the Philippines call for an army of occupation 75,000 strong. Even with 75,000 troops permanently assigned to duty in our new we might say prospective possessions, we shall barely be able to hold our present footing, such as it is. Events have shown that General Otis was never at any time within 1,000 miles of any true understanding of the situation in Luzon. No one able to read the news papers and the Congressional Record can possibly be persuaded to give respectful audience to the foolish twitter of the Philippine commission sitting solemuly uttering oilicial nonsense. We arc face to face with the facts. Why not recognize them with candor and deal with them honestly and bravely? Washington It is high time the American public got over its delusions about this war. It has deceived itself too long with the notion that it was fighting merely an ambitious rebel chief, representing only a fraction of a single tribe, and maintaining his power as much by the terror he inspires as by any sense of patriotism. We are not fighting a government or an army, but a whole people. Rut if we arc going to conquer the people we shall have to imitate the course of Great Britain in South Africa. Where an armed body of rebels appears wo must burn the village that gave it shelter and destroy the crops on which it fed. We must concentrate non-combatants in small garrisoned districts, as the Spanish did. We must send all pris oners to distant exile. We must execute promptly any who arc detected in breaking their oath of alle giance. We must make our soldiers a terror to the whole population, because a people can be ruled by force only after they have been taught to fear. The work of tyranny can be done only by the methods of tyranny. Buffalo Express (Rep.) w Is there to be no modification of the Administra tion's Philippine policy? After nearly two years of war what do we see in Luzon and the other rebellious islands? Tho natives, though their armies have been scattered, are fighting as guerillas with as much resolution as ever against the invader who was wel comed as a deliverer. Where it has bcen sought to conquer peace and order, bloody anarchy exists. IJo w long is tliis to last? The American republic can afford to do what is best for itself, materially and morally, even though that should involve the freedom of the Filipinos. The democrats were quite right in their campaign contention that the attempt to rule the Filipinos without their consent and in spite of their fierce and sanguinary protest docs violence to the letter and spirit of the Declaration of Independ ence. Had "imperialism" been the only issue Bryan and not McKinley would today be the president-elect, for there are millions of republicans who agree with the defeated rather than the successful candidate on this question. Philadelphia North American (Rep.) w Since August 0, 1898, we have sold to the people in the Philippine islands goods to the amount of $!J0 000,000. To effect this sale we have expended up wards of 8200,000,000 and sacrificed 3,251 American soldiers, flow long will it take this nation to bank rupt itself by securing trade and commerce at such a cost? And how mucli more would we have sold to the'Philippine islands in the same length of time if we had treated the Filipinos on American, lines? Omaha World-Herald. 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 II 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 Ml 1 1 1 1 II 1-1 Cuba I11HW -HHHH I I I II I I I I I II I I i II II I The New York "Nation" outlines, on what it be lieves to be excellent authority, the scheme with which the United States government will attempt to settle the Cuban question. To put it quite briefly, this scheme is to call Cuba an independent and sover eign state and at the same time to deprive her of all rights which are generally connected with independ ence and sovereignty. For instance, the Cubans will be allowed no army and no navy, no diplomatic relations with other countries (everything will be ar ranged for them at Washington), and no right to raise money by a public loan. This plan is said "by a mouthpiece of the government to be in keeping of the original promise made by congress "in a practical and not in a sentimental sense." It is conceivable that in the last two and a half years the government may have juggled their minds into believing that this would be a practical redemption of their promise, but we who have not had the advantage of having our minds so closely exercised on the subject cannot re gard it as a redemption in any sense at all. The words in the old promise which disclaimed "any disposition or intention to exercise sovereignty, jurisdiction or control" forbid us to think otherwise. And it is cer tain that if the Cubans had foreseen in what practical sense they were to be made independent they would not have accepted the offer of American intervention. If the United States government were to say that they had made a mistake, aud were more or less honestly to try to justify the repudiation of their promise, though that would be a sorry course, it would.be bet ter than this giving of a stone and swearing that it is bread. One only hopes that the "Nation" is mistaken, but its character renders this only too unlikely. Manchester (Eng.) Guardian. The democratic party is a corporation organized to promote the general welfare, having at pi'esqnt 7,000,000 stockholders. A few gentlemen who were formerly stockholders but sold out their holdings four years ago, now want to "re-organ i'e" the corpor ation. The proposition receives the same considera tion from the 7,000,000 real stockholders as a similar one would in any industrial company. Columbus Press Post. I 1 Sc V i&vatoi-. ki V Jfju.JiJfafV t$- -" (