PERSONAL, POLITICAL AND PERTINENT' This is how a Kentucky judge cnarged a jury the other day :. If you believe what the counsel for the plain tiff has told you, your verdict will be for the plaintiff; if, on the other hand, you believe what the defendant's counsel has told you, you will give a verdict for the defendant. liut if you are like me, and don't believe what either of them said, I don't know what you will do." The jury dis agreed. 4 About the most tantalizing pre dicament imaginable for a man to be in has fallen to the lot of one Valen tiue. who has recently been left $100, kh) by the death of a relative but does not dare show up to claim it'for fear of being hung for a murder be com mitted a number of years ago. An accident happened not long since that, happening a year ago, might have been anything but pleas ant. The clerks in one of the banks of the city, in winding up the time lock, made a mistake and set the thing for a 24-hour shift, instead of twelve hours, and when the bank opened up Tuesday morning it didn't have any more money than a newspaper man is supposed to have about that time of the week. It had plenty of the filthy stuff, but what good was it for busi ness purposes locked up in the safe. The bank president simply despatched one of the clerks over to another bank with a big grain sack and the joung man soon returned with all kinds and colors of money, from the "double saw-buck" to the nickel piece. Business was carried on as though nothing had happened, and everybody was happy. Nebi aska City Press. Miss Mary Brown of Galesburg, III., paid $2 for a package at a sale of un claimed goods by an express company in that city a few days ago. Upon opening the bundle, it was found to contain two fine oil paintings by a celebrated French artist. The paint ings had been on exhibition at the world's fair and are said to be worth at least $1,000. Cook Courier. The Nebraska City News says that "There was an alleged case of 'love at first sight' at Topeka, Kas., a month or so ago. The marriage was de scribed as a 'romantic affair.' But now the wife is suelng for a divorce, and states in her petition that she tried to kiss her husband but that he repulsed her and declared that he would not permit any such liberty, 'no, not for $500.' She wants the court t.i allow her 825 a month out of hubby's salary, which, under the circum stances, is a very reasonable request. The anxiety of man to enter into a marriage contract was clearly, por trayed in Judge 'Eaton's office the otner day when, in uniting a couple the groom responded "Yes sir" just four times in the wrong place at the wrong time, and finally had to say "yes" the fifth time. The bride waited until the judge had completed his say, and made one answer do. That's the difference between some men and some women. Nebraska City Press. Ex-Governor Furnas of Brownville, has in his possession a little flag that bas quite an interesting history. It is the first United States flag that ever floated to the breezes of Nemaha county and it began its career at a fourth of July celebration at Brown ville in 1S55. Gov. Furnas afterwards used it as his regimental headquarters flag during the war, as colonel of the second Nebraska cavalry. At the fourth of July celebration at Auburn this year Gov. Furnas again unfurled the flag and gave its history before he introduced the orator of the day Gov. Ilolcomb. Verdon Pioneer Itecord. Susan B. Anthony has decided to take a rest and yield the mantle of emancipation to younger women. Miss Anthony is 70 past and a suspi cion has penetrated her inner con sciousness that she is no longer a new woman. The soldiers' home at Milford will be dedicated on Tuesday, Oct. 8th, the anniversary of the battle of Perry ville, Ky. Gov. Ilolcomb and other per sons of statewide reputation will be present. And now they say that the bloom ers are to be entirely superseded by the trim, close-fitting knickerbockers, be cause the latter are more convenient and comfortable. Goodness gracious! How much further is this convenient and comfortable argument to be ad vanced ? It serves a man right who goes to church and closes his eyes when the contribution box goes around and ridi cules the preacher; who picks up a newspaper that somebody else pays for and tells how it ought to be edited, tq get roped, into, a circus anil then roar because he djd not get ten times his money's worth. He will die sometime and the preacher that did not suit him will officiate and the editor he abused will feel like writing, "Its a good thing; push it along." Joseph Ertt of Nebraska City hanged himself early Friday morn ing to a small apple tree near his house. Despondency was the cause of the rash act. Truth rambles in paths that fiction would hesitate to tread. A 13-year-old girl of Butte, Mont., ran across a 600 pound bear near town, drove the frightened animal to her home several miles away, and called her brother to kill it. which he did. Nails have gone up$2G per ton owing to the approacn of a presidential elec tion. So many campaign lies will have to be nailed. We cannot dodge the truth without getting splashed with the mud that makes what we have done visible to the world. A perfect mouth for a woman is thus described by one authority: "It should be of medium size, the upper half shaped like Cupid's bow, the un der half nearly straight, and both bright crimson in color, and neither too thick nor too thin." Another au thority says it should be a little less noisy when discussing the qualities of the latest stvles of the bikes. A well will be sunk, and a windmil furnish the power for the water works at Elmwood. A 30.000 gallon tank will be erected on a fifty foot tower, and five inch pipes convey the water to the business portian of the town. 1 would rather be a dog and lick a sjre than have the semblance of a man and not have manhood enough to re fuse to vote for a yellow dog because my party nominated him. C. V. Mor gan. The latest thing out for newspapers who carry delinquent subscribers is that every time the name of a delin quent is mentioned in the paper it is inverted. For sample, A!lUra moain and family are spending this week in Chicago. Subscribers know what it means and immediately there is a grand rush to get right side up again. A northern woman has got up and sent to the Atlanta exposition an auto graph towel. Any country printing office can furnish one of them. All that will be needed will be a piece of chalk with which to write autogaphs on it. Troy Chief. A bashful fellow called on his best girl the other evening, and they both sat on the sofa at opposite ends. Af ter a silence of considerable duration, evidently spent by both in hard thought, she mustered up enough courage to ask him what he was think ing about. He, hoping to please her, replied, "I was thinking of the same thing you were." She, turning round, replied, "I'll slap your mouth if you try it." Morrill Vindicator. Tiie otlice-seeker is around with his smiling face inquiring after the well fare of your mother-in-law, uncle's, aunts and cousins; your wife and the babies, and last but not least, your self. "Can't you help me out at the primaries." :Miss Jennie Brown, of Neligh, went to sleep with her glossy head of hair hanging down her back in two long braids. During the night some one entered her room and with some sharp instrument like a razor severed the braids from her her bead without awakening her or her sister. The eastern owner of a ranch in San Diego county, California, has devised a novel way of keeping thoroughly posted as to the condition of his prop erty without the trouble and expense of visiting it two or three times a year. At certain seasons he has an elaborate series of photographs of the rpoperty taken, showing the buildings. the stock, the fruit trees and every thing about the place. These pictures show the amount of work done and the exact condition of the work on the ranch. A visitor recently returned from Elyria, a small Burlington station in Valley county, tells a wonderful story of an onion crop. that came undar his observation at that point. J. II. Powell the station agent, havinga little leisure time on his hands, planted four acres of onions, embracing several of the most prolific varieties. With the as sistance of his father, he gave the plot special cultivation, and careful me as urement and estimate of his yield place it at 700 bushels per acre. Many of the plants weigh over two pounds each and a collection of the best speci mens range irom two pounds nine ounces to three pounds and a quarter. The onions were raised on the Loup vauey, uui witnout any aid from irri Ration. Mr. Powell has cabbage and celery which are fully as creditable to his Industry and skill as a farmer as are his onions. Lincoln Journal. N. H. Meeker, the Greenwood banker, was in town Saturday attend ing a referee's sale ot some Greenwood lots. Henry Kirkham departed Monday for a few weeks' visit with his old friend, Richard Vivian, out near Alliance. Dick Streight was in town from South Bend Saturday. He says repub licans of the west end are not in the most happy frame of mind possible. The two-weeks-old child of Mr. and Mrs. It J. Reynolds died Thursday of summer complaint. The remains were taken to lrcival. Iowa, Friday for interment. Mrs. Jos. Lnke and daughter. Miss Alice, who have bt-en visiting at their old home in England for several months returned home Monday, in ex cellent health. Joe Fri'ze of Wilber, 20 years old, loaded a shot gun, placing the cap on first. While he was wadding the last charge the gun exploded, shattering his left hand. Chas. Beeson has been quite ser iously ill for the past week. It was feared that he would have an attack of typhoid fever, but his physician now thinks he will be around in a few days. It is reported that Eli Birdsall, Her man Fields and Phil Kianamon in dulged in a three-cornered fight at a bance on the Iowa bottoms Thursday. Birdsall is reported to have come out on top. A part of Wm. Neville's gradingand bridge-building tools, which have been stored at Lincoln for some time, have been shipped to this city, to be used by Mr. Neville in his railroad contract over the river. Henry Geringand Louie Egenberger ran a hundred yard foot race Friday morning in the alley south of Main street. Louie was not in it at any time, and Henry came under the wire an easy winner. The time was not learned but is said to have been quite fast. Marshalltown, Iowa, proposes to keep in the procession during the heel of the summer. A telegram from that point states that "hailstones as large as hens' eggs full for twenty minutes in this neighborhood and drifted in the gulleys six feet deep." This snows under all ordinary competition. A young doctor of a neighboring vil lage, wishing to make a good impres sion upon a German farmer, men tioned that he hadstudied homeopathy and was also a graduate of the "regu lar" school. "Oh, dot vas noding," said the faamer. "I bad vonce a calf vot sucked two cows, and he made n jding but a schteer after all." The little seven-year-old son of Mr. and Mrs. Will Miller of Perris, Cal., formerly of this city, was the victim of a serious accident recently. The little fellow was run over by a motor car and for a time it was feared that one leg would have to be amputated. Later reports, however, are to the effect that he is getting along nicely. Th Nrbraskn Cuulrreure. The Nebraska Methodist conference met in Lincoln and a number of changes were made. The Nebraska City district will be presided over by Rev. P. Van Fleet of this city, who succeeds Dr. L. F. Britt, also of this city. Rev. Van Fleet is succeeded by Rev. G. M. Couffer. The following are the appointments made for the Nebraska City district: P. Van Fleet, presiding elder. Platts- mouth. Adams, J. G. Stewart. Auburn, John Gallagher. Brock and Talmage, M. Damotte. Cook. J. M. Darby. Douglas, Wm. Cowley. Elk Creek, George E. Price. Fall City, J. A. Barker. Humboldt, J. W. Swan. Johnson, J. Calvert. Louisville. J. C. Hobbs. Nebraska City, II. C. Haman. Nehawka, L. Jean. Palmyra, C. E. Rowe. Peru, (i. M. Gates. Plattsmouth, C. M. Couffer. Rulo, E. L. Barcb. Shubert, William Simpson. South Bend.D. Fetz. Stella, J. A. Souders. Sterling, B. E. Newton. Syracuse, J. Seabrook. Table Rock, B. C. Johnson. Tecumseh, J. R. Woodcock. Union, A. L. Folden. Weeping Water. G.. II.Moulton. Rev. Van Fleet's many friends here will be pleased to learn of his promo tion. Some Ilig- Corn. Col. Graves of the Union Ledger in flicts the following on the readers of that paper, and is respectfully recom mended for the "belt" now in posses sion of John Boone: "A story comes from the country illustrating the folly of boys, and at the same time it gives an idea as to the great corn crops of Nebraska this year. The story ii that a boy climbed a corn stalk to see how the ears were getting along, and when he started down he found that the stalk was growing upward faster than he could climb down. Men have been trying to cut down the stalk, but it is feared that they will not succeed in time to save the boy from death by starvation. He has been subsisting on raw corn, and has thrown down four bushels of cobs, but it is thought that his supply is almost exhausted. Wednesday he dropped a note request ing that the Ledger be sent to him by means of a kite, and stated that he hoped to get down in time to attend the county fair at Plattsmouth next week. 1I'MUIM. (Written for Tub Joibsal.) Af one who slumbers long and them awakes. To find his buty fancies only dreams; So unto him for whom Death's morning breaks, This life a false and fleeting vision seems. Isabel Ricbet. Farmers who expect soon to lay in theil AVINTJEIt'S SUPPLY OF COAL will find that Henry IK-mpel is prepared to fill all orders for tLv best quality at lowest prices. Yard at the B. & M. shop yards iS tf 1J rets making;. I am now located on west Vine street, No. 1203, where I solicit the patronage of one and all. Work done promptly and satisfaction guaranteed. Prices reasonable. Please call. so Mns. E. WJ2AMEK. The serv ices of the iury for the com ing term of court will not be required until Thursday, October 3, as no busi ness will be transacted until that time. J.O. Keaver of Knoxwille, Iowa, who has been visiting up ut Hot Springs. S. D., for a couple of weeks, arrived in town Monday. He will return home in a few days. Mr. Reaver reports eight inches of snow in the Black Hills when he left. The lilK. Shows. Lemen Bros.' Combined Circus, Menagerie, Hippodrome, Oceanic Aquarium and Congress of Living Phenomena, will exhibit at Platts mouth, Monday, September 23. Re ports from all quarters pronounce the above shows the leaders in tented amusements, and cannot fail to inter est the masses. That itposessesmany raie animals never before seen in this country, the only real .Aquatic Show f sea animals, a great Ilipprodrome, a Double Circus, and many phenome nal living wonders is withoutquestion. Its career has been a triumphal suc cess. It is enthusiastically received and immensely patronized wherever it spreads its tents, and it said to give more and better show than any other organization in America. The news papers are unanimous in its praise. We look for a grand outpouring of the populace hereon show day. Coleman, the jeweler, where Car ruth used to be, Plattsmouth. 24tf Douglas W. Shinn is being "joshed'' considerably by the boys lately. Doug, claims to be pretty well posted on affairs in general, and that fact is responsible for his present "troubles." The other day Jake lieeson innocently asked him where the word Ak-Sar-Ben originated and its meaning. Doug, re flected for a moment and then said that it was an Arabian word, and meant great, grand, etc. Jake wrote the word on a piece of paper and handed it to Doug, requesting him to read it backwards. It is reported that Doug, gazed at the word for about live minutes without uttering a word, and then stole silently away. It wouldn't be right to "josh" him about it. The Correct Idea. Johnson County Journal. The flouring mills of Nebraska will convert thousands of bushels of Da kota wheat into Hour this year, as well as the Nebraska products. Xebraska made flour is selling right along with the best brands of the northern mills. If the citizens of every town in the state would resolve to buy only home made Hour, hundreds of thousands of dollars could thus be kept in circula tion within the state, greatly to our commercial advantage. Take your jewelry repairing to Cole man, Plattsmouth. A Prominent Wholenale (irorer of Omaha Neb., Write : To the afflicted: Several years ago I discovered a slight falling and bleedingof thelower bowel which increased and became very distressing. I made inquiry as tothe nature of the disease and learned that I had a somewhat aggravated case of Hemorrhoids or Piles. Was told of several remedies and used them as di rected, obtaining thereby some tem porary relief. Not being satistied with such slight relief 1 cast about for a per manent cure; when a friend directed the use of the famous Magntet Pile Killer. I used it. Immediate relief from pain followed, and soon a com plete cure was affected. Very respectfully, Oscaii Allen. For sale by Gering & Co. Itch on human, mange on horses, dogs and all ttock, cured in 30 minutes bv Woodford's Sani tary Lotion. Sold by V. (I. Fricke fc Co., drug Klsts, l'latUmouth. 37 s Xlt of l ettere Remaining unclaimed in the postoQice at riattsmontb, Nebraska, Sept. 18; K'ng, Frank Lejmberg, M J Nott, Miss Mattie Woods, Geo II Moigber, Mrs Mary Persons calling for any of the above letters or parcels will please say "ad vertised." W. K. Fox, P- M. What More Could You Ask ? PEARLMAN, The House Furnisher, Offers to buyers the chance to secure the VERY BEST in his line which the market affords, and AT PRICES WHICH ABSOLUTELY DEFY COMPETITION. I 'HE fact that my stock is the Biggest and Best in all Cass county, deserves the attention of people desiring something in the FURNITURE line. The three floors of my store building are full to overflowing with new goods, and everything goes at "depression" prices. Call and see for yourself. I. PEARLMAN, The House Furnisher, Opposite Court I p o o ? o Buv Your o s s o s 2 o s o o OF: F. S. WHITE Every purchase made at his store 2 is a guarantee that you obtained the best and most goods for the least money. S o o P. J. HANSEN, DEALER IN STAPLE and FANCY Groceries, Crockery - AND- Glassware. FLOTTR AND FEED A Specialty - One door North of Postoffice ED. FIX Z GERALD. THK (IL1) KELIAKLE Liveryman HAS PURCHASED THE Sixth Street Checked Barn. AND WILL RUN IT IN FIRST-CLASS b'J . V- V. Special attention to Funerals. Hacks be un to all trains. "Promptness and Fidelity to Customers' 1 h his mot to Pakk Obesity Pills will reduce your weight PERMANENTLY from 12 to Impounds a month. NO STARVING, sickness or injury; NO PUB LICITY. They build up the health and beauti fy the complexion, leaving NO WRINKLES or ttabbiness. STOUT ABDOMENS and difficult breathing surely relieved. NO EXPERIMENT, but ascientlnc and positive relief, adopted only after years of experience. All orders supplied direct from our office. Price 12.00 per package or three packages for $5.00 by mall postpaid. Testimonials and particulars sealed cents. t"AH correspondence strictly confidential. Park Remedy Co., Boston, Mass . $500 l:ev di WE wili 'iav the a'ove re wan r anycqse oi Liver Comprint 1 ..rpsia, piok Headache In digestion Ot ;tipai k ":j i r Costiveness we cannot cure with West's Yt-.retable Liver Fills, when the directions m e :;tnctl complied with. Th arr; purely YeteULMc, pt.J never fail to give sa. istaction. !? Coslm. Large bores, 25 cents. Beware of cjui.U rfcil 1 and imitations. The eren uine nianulii tuiod only bv TIIE JOHN C. WEhT COMPANY. iiHlCAuO, ILL- F. j. Fricke &. Co, druggists. Notice to Creditors. " " Etatk op Nebraska, i Cass County. - ss. In the matter of the estate of John B. Holmes, deceased: fJOTICE Is hereby given that the claims and A demands of all persons against John B. Holmes, deceased, late of said countv and state, will be received, examined and adjusted by the county court at the court bouse In Platts mouth, on the 19th day of March, A. D., 1896. at ten o'clock In the forenoon, and that six mouths from and after 19th day of September. A IK. 1895, is the time limtted for creditors of said deceased to present their claims for ex amination and allowance. Given under my hand this 17th day of Sep tember, A. D..1K95. l-4 B. S. RAMSEY, County Judge. llti e urn at Is iii Cured in a Day. "Mystic Cure" for Rheumatism and Neugral gia radically cures In l to 3 days. Its action up on the system is remarkable and mvsterious. It removes at once the cause and the dissease Im mediately disappears. The first dose greatly benefits; 75 cents. Sold by F. G-. Fricke A Co. , druggists, Plattsmouth. 37-8 House, Plattsmouth. Groceries, Dry Goods, Notions I General Mdse. The Old Reliable Pioneer Merchant First National Bank PLATTSMOUTH, NEB. Capital, paid up $50,000 OFFICERS: Geobqk E. Doyit President F. E. White Vice president S.Waugsu Cashier H. N. Dovkt Assistant Cashier DIRECTORS: George E. Dovey, F. E. White. D. Hawks worth S. Waugh and H. N. Dovey. careful attention given to the interests of customers. Collections made and promptly remitted for. Highest market price paid for county warrants and state and county bonds The Plattsmouth Hills, C. UEISEL, Prop. This Mill has been rebuilt, and furnished with Machinery of the best manufacture in the world. Their "Plansifter" Flour, Has no Superior in America. Give it trial and be convinced. H. D. TRAVIS, Attorney and Counselor at Law. WILL PRACTICE IN ALL THE COURTS. 07PlCU-Itooiiia 1 and 2, Union HI L, Plattsmoutli, - - - Neb. JOHN WATERMAN, DEALER IN Lumber and Coal. Mendotacoal f 4.25 Hard coal 9.50 Canon City coal 7.60 Dr. Agnes V. Swetland, HOMEOPATHIST. pecial attention to Obstetrics, Diseases of Women and Woman's Surgery. Oice : imiSigSSfru Omatia, Neb Dr. Alfred Shipman, Office in Riley Hotel, Main Street entrance. Telephone No. 95. Residence one block south of M. P. depot. Fred Krug Brewing Co., OMAHA NEB. Fred Egenberger, Act. A Amours BnmnHfBlErg. Splendid curative agent for Nerrona or Sick Headache. Brain Kihatisf inn. KleeDlewfritxw Lfipecial or peneral Neuralgiaaldo for K)u pepxia. Anemia. Antidote for Alcoholit and other excetMusi. Price, 10, 5o cttuti Effervescent. THE ARNOLD CHEMICAL. CD. 151 S.Westcra'vcnua. CHl&A