I
DEADLY FIRE DAMP.
It Causes Terrible Loss of Life in
Austria Silesia.
Explosion In a Mine Which Takes the
Lives of 180 Men A Party of Res
cuers Killed by a Second Kx
plosion A Scorn or More Hart.
WOE IN CHINA.
Thousands
the Flagrue
MAST MINERS PERISH.
TRErPAir, Austrian Silesia, June
16. A terrible disaster. involving"
great loss of life, is reported from
Karwin. It is o facially reported that
160 miners were killed and twenty fa
tally hurt. An explosion took place
at 10 o'clock Thursday night in a pit of
the Franziska mines and resulted in
tho death of 120 miners. The first
explosion was almost immediately
followed by a series of others in the
mines, the most disastrous of the latter
being" in the Johannes pit, where many
miners were killed. A rescue party of
ten men, which descended into one of
the pits at 5 o'clock in the morning",
also perished. The ventilator shafts of
several of the pits were destroyed and
fire spread in all directions. Assistance
has been sent from all directions.
The Franziska and Johannes mines
are owned by Count von Larisch.
Fourteen bodies have been recovered.
The men who escaped from the burn
ing" mines say the explosions originated
through dynamite blasting by a miner.
Such blasting- was against the rules,
but the rules were disobeyed by the
miner in order to save himself work.
M'BRIDE'S DEFENSE.
lie Tells Why the Committee Agreed to
the Conference.
Columbus, O., June 16. There are
abundant reasons for believing" the
miners of the Hocking" valley will fall
into line for the agreement next Mon
day and accept its terms. Telegrams
have been received from every part of
the valley confirming that view. The
more important meetings were held at
Nclsonville, Longstreth, Orbiston and
New Pittsburgh, where the largest min
ing interest on the line of the Hocking
valley lay. At these points the miners
decided to resume work Monday on
the new scale. Many of the dispatches
criticise President Adams quite severe
ly for the radical stand he has taken.
Reports from Sand Run and Minerton
say the men have decided to go to work
Monday, and advices from Buchtel
and Straitsville are to the same effect.
At Shawnee the miners declared
their intention to hold out for 70
cents, providing the miners generally
are in favor of it, otherwise they will
return to work. At Steuben ville the
miners decided to return to work un
der the agreement and threw President
Adams' circular calling a state conven
tion into the waste basket. Private ad
vices from the eastern part of the state
indicate that the feeling there in favor
of accepting the compromise is growing.
President McBride said on Friday
night:
"The men have only been held in line by the
suspense occasioned through the holding of
conventions at different points and the agita
tion kept up by our board members, district
presidents, organizers and other field workers
whose expenses were paid by us. Our funds
were exhausted and we are hundreds of dollars
in debt, and our field workers, unable to pay
Iheirown expenses, were compelled to stay at
home, while from all districts came the cry:
"For God's sake, send us men or money to
keep our men in line or the fight Is lost.' AVe
-could not aid them because we had no money
to send and most of our workers had
exhausted their personal means and were
helpless to go on. and although myself and
.others have advanced money to keep the
.movement alive, if financial aid cannot be se
cured from some source the next issue of our
official journal will be its last until money
comes in. and to suspend publication cuts off
the last reliable means of communication be
tween the national office and the men.
'"We have a dozen men in jail for conspiracy,
among them W. B. Wilson, of our national
board at Cumberland. Md. With no money to
defend these men. many of them, though inno
cent, will suffer. Four thousand men deserted
us at Coal Creek. Tenn. Nearly 7.000 are nt
work in Kansas; 10.000 out of H.UXHn Virginia
and West Virginia are also at work. Others are
setting aside our policy of peace. We had
reached the danger line and made the best we
could of the situation."
Pittsih-rgh. Pa., June 16. The coal
miners strike in this district was offi
cially settled Friday by a delegate con
vention ratifj-ing the action taken at
Columbus by which the Pittsburgh
miners agree to work for C9 cents a ton.
It was only after a day's had fight
ing that the officers succeeded in ac
complishing this. In all probability
the settlement would have been voted
down had not a letter from President
McRride been read. lie pleaded with
them to accept the terms offered as
the best that could be secured. He
said the union was on the verge of
bankruptcy and it would be impos
sible to continue the fight.
Terhe Haute, Ind., June 16. There
is reason for saying the vote in the
miners' state convention to-day will be
practically unanimous against going to
work at the 00 cent rate. Ten dele
gates who came from Washington and
Daviess counties say they will stay out
all summer if necessary.
Fall Victims to
Now Kaglnjr.
Vancouver, B. C, June 15. China is
being decimated by an awful plague
that is raging there. Thousands of
people have died from it, and full de
tails of the alarming spread of the ter
rible scoarge have just been brought
here by the steamer Empress of Japan.
The plague first made its ap
pearance in Canton towards the
end of April.
In Canton there is scarcely a house
that has not some one dead in it. The
plague commenced there in the Mo
hammedan quarters and 100 cases are
reported daily. It is impossible to as
certain the number of deaths, as the
officials try to suppress the facts. At
the largest charitable (native) dispen
sary a notice at the door states that
up to date 2,000 coffins have been given
away. This is far below the aotual
number used. Six thousand would be
much nearer.
May 10 it was found that the disease
had reached Hong Kong and energetic
steps were at once taken to cleanse
the infested localities. Ilowever,
hospitals were opened for the
sick and the ship Hj-gra was moored
in the harbor for the accommoda
tion of patients, a large number of
whom were taken there. Up to the
latest reports S93 cases had occurred in
Hong Kong and 320 deaths. The
schools have been closed and a panic
exists among the Chinese, many of
whom are fleeing to the mainland.
Hoxo Kong, June 16. Seventeen
hundred Chinese have died of the
plague here since its outbreak on
May 4. Despite previous reports
to the contrary, the European popu- .
lation up to the present has not
been attacked by the disease. The
stringent precautionary measures
taken by the Europeans are the cause
f their immunity from sickness. The
epidemic is now decreasing in severity.
There has been a general exodus from
the Chinese quarters,
A RECORD OF SHAME. i
REPUBLICAN OBSTRUCTIONISTS
Delay In the Senate Caused by Fat-Frying;
Protectionists.
In dealing with the tariff the car
dinal sin of the senate has been ob
struction, and the sinners are the re
publicans. Through many years of experience
in Coxeyizing schedules the republic
an senators have become a close trad
ing corporation. With specific duties
they have acquired expertness in ar
ranging duties so that low tariffs fall
on the grades of goods which are not
controlled by import duties and high
tariffs on the great staple necessaries
of the household.
Republicans have in a compact body
resisted all progress toward a vote. It
is they who have given to Gorman and
Brice about all the power used to
blackmail the democratic majority.
And republicans were in every deal
Briee and Gorman made. What do
Brice, Gorman, Smith and Murphy
care about the cutlery and hardware
schedules? What do they care about
cotton cloth? The hand of Quay is
seen all through the metal classifica
tion, and Aldrich would as well have
signed his name to the cotton amend
ments. The Gorman combine has been
a republican deal.
If the business men who are anx
iously awaiting a settlement have had
their eyes open they must have seen
that the great majority of democrats
in both houses were ready and anxious
months ago to give the country a lib
erally devised tariff law. The full
strength of the republicans has been
put forth for obstruction.
Nor can the obstruction come under
any honest theory of conviction on the
tariff. The republican senators knew
that a law of some kind was certain
to be passed. They could not say that
they were- fighting in the hope of pre
serving the McKinley law. All they
have done is to hold their ranks solid
for obstruction while the Gorman dem
ocrats did the work of the loDby by
bulldozing tactics. The easterners
THE BUCKEYE EPHRAIMS.
THE ORATOR'S
An Earnest of What the McKlnleyltes Pur
pose to Accomplish.
Dyed-in-the-wool McKinleyism had
the floor and everything else at the re
cent Ohio republican convention. The
promised shading of opinion in favor
of some recession from the extreme
policy of protection, named in honor
of the crovernor of Ohio, was not ap
parent in any direction. On the other ! Xhat is
hand the Buckeye republicans not ! claimed.
only stood out on the advance line and
hurrahed for McKinleyism, but, en
couraged by democratic demoraliza
tion in congress, they dared to push
out still further.
That is the logic and the history of
protection. It is never satisfied. Its
appetite thrives lustily upon in
dulgence. The extreme protection of
to-day is insufficient to-morrow. As
the infant waxes fat it leans less upon
its legs and more upon its crutch, and
needs occasionally to replace the old
one with a stouter to support its
flabby, overfed weight. Having con
tituted themselves the especial guardi
ans of extreme protection, the Ohio
republicans, with never a thank you
for what they have received, and never
a regret for what it has cost the coun
try to pay the price, raise a shrill cry
for more.
"We condemn and denounce." say
they, "any attempt to repeal or
amend it (the McKinley act) which
does not have for its object better pro
tection to American labor and Ameri
can interests than is secured by it."
In the republican vernacular, "bet
ter protection for American labor" is a
euphemism for biggerbounties for pro
tected monopolists. The Ohio repub
licans, sounding the keynote of Gov.
McKinley's presidential campaign, de
clare their desire to advance protective
duties still further, to tax the Ameri
can people still more oppressively for
the support of favored and pampered
interests, to impose upon the burdened
taxpayers of the country a yet heavier
weight of unconstitutional taxation
ART.
Ex tampons
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.
Beusatlonal Revelations with Reference to
New York's Police.
New York, June 16. The startling
fact was brought out at the police in
vestigation Thursday that the police
give protection to the green goods
swindlers and share their profits.
New York, June 16. Over 510,000,000
a year is the amount of money illegiti
mately collected b3' the New York po
lice for "protection." according to a
morning paper. The figures are
based on the testimony taken by
the Lexow committee. The paper
says that there are 3,000 men em
ployed on the police force and that the
amount tppropriated for the depart
ment by the board of estimates in the
budget of 1894 is S5,139,147. This
amount is entered up as the legitimate
sum received by the police force for its
maintenance. The paper introduces its
showing as follows:
"The testimony brought out by the Lexow
Investigating committee shows that the police,
in addition to their salaries from the city,
have had an additional Income contributed by
the keepers of disorderly houses, saloons,
gambling-houses, merchants and pushcart ped
dlers." MANY PERISHED.
PHYSICIAN, HEAL THYSELF.
A. Terriblo Disaster Occurs Off the Coast
of Ireland.
Castxe Bar Island. Ireland, June
16. Dispatches from Westport Quay,
about li miles from this city, an
nounce a terrible disaster to a party
of harvesters who were on their xv&y
to Scotland. A passenger boat
returning to Westport Quay from
Achil island, having on board
eighty harvesters, who were
to be shipped to Scotland
from Westport, capsized. According
to the first reports of the disaster,
thirty out of eighty passengers were
drowned, but later advices say that it
is believed that fifty of the harvesters
lost their lives. The boat capsized off
Annagh Head.
i 9 Jul Mkfnn
How Success Is Won In Public
neons Speaking1.
A popular preacher who was accus
tomed to write out his sermons was
complimented on a Sunday by a critic
of excellent taste. "What was it that
particularly pleased you?" asked the
preacher. The critic referred in detail
to a specific passage of the sermon.
strange!" the preacher ex
"That was the only portion
of the sermon that was not written.
When I reached that point, a new
thought came to me like a flash, and I
enlarged upon it extemporaneously."
"Then you would do better to preach
hereafter without notes," replied tho
critic.
The preacher made the experiment
for several Sundays, but with such dif
ferent success that he returned to the
practice of writing his sermons. He
had made the mistake of preaching ex
temporaneously without adequate prep
aration. J
He had depended upon continuous
flashes of inspiration like that which
illuminated the passage admired by tho
complimentary critic, but they had not
come.
The best extemporaneous sermons
and addresses are thought out with
painstaking care beforehand. That
was Mr. Beeclier's lifelong habit. Mr. .
Gladstone, like Mr. Bright, has adopt- j
ed the same practice, and not infre-
quently writes the introduction and
peroration so as to render them mora
effective. j
A well known lawyer who entered
the United States senate greatly im
paired his reputation as an orator by
lack of preparation. He was naturally
indolent, and from long practice in the
courts he had convinced himself that ha
could always depend upon his resource,
as a fluent talker. j
"I never prepare myself for a public
occasion," he once remarked to a friend.
"I can think aloud on my feet as I go
along."
He made such bad work of public
speaking during his last days that audi
ences began to wonder how he had ever
gained a reputation as an orator. When
he fancied that he was "thinking
aloud," he was talking thoughtlessly
Henry W. Grady, a son of the Geor
jjia orator, has just been admitted to
the bar at Atlanta, ai'er passing with
credit a severe examination. He resem
bles his father both in appearance and
mental endowment.
Miss Olive Schreiner, since mar
riage, has become it seems, simply Mrs.
Olive Schreiner. Her husband, shar
ing his wife's advanced and progressive
views, has added her name to his and
become Mr. Cronwright Schreiner.
"Fagging" had become entirely ob
solete at Eton. Thirty years ago it was
carried on with great brutality. The
story of "Tom Brown at Hugh"' has, it
is said, done more to kill tho old sys
tem in English colleges than any other
agency.
Dr. Cyrus Teed, of Chicago, the
founder of the strange religion knowi
as Koresh, is soon to buy a plot of land
in Florida, thirty-six miles square.
This will constitute the "Heaven" of
the Koreshc-ans; and in its center he
will build a temple, to cost 300,000,000.
Japan is not only adopting the ma
terial civilization of the west, but is as
eagerly assimilating its literature.
Many standard English novels have
lately been translated into Japanese,
and ten -cent paper editions of Dickens
in the vernacular are especially popu
lar. The lady who has won fame and
fortune as a song-writer under the
name of Hope Temple is shortly to be
married to M. Andre Messager, the
French composer of light operas. Miss
Temple, who is very fair and pictur
esque in appearance, has for the last
year resided in Paris. Her real name
is Davis, and her intimate friends cal
her "Doty." Among her many sisters
is Mrs. Sam Ltwis.
The king of Italy has conferred
upon Trof. Virchow, the famous Ger
man surgeon, the grand cross of the
order of St. Maurice and Lazarus.
Irof. Virchow is one of those men who
seem to have time for everything. He
is a university professor, an editor, a
contributor to numerous journals, a
politician, and finds opportunity to at
tend the meetings of scores of societies
It was a law3-er of that habit of mind to which he belongs. N. Y. Tribune
who inspired one of Mr. Lincoln's cut
ting sarcasms. He had been talking in
a circle, making no real progress in his
argument, and only confusing and be
wildering the court.
Mr. Lincoln compared him to a man
on the Sangamon, who had built a
steamboat with a six-foot boiler and a
ten-foot whistle. Whenever the whis
tle was blown it used up all the steam
so that the boat stopped, and could not
go-
Too elaborate preparation may ren
der a speech acadejaie or overwrought.
Charles Sumner 14 bored in his library,
trimming and polishing his sentences,
and with all its splendor of rhetoric
and dignit3r of diction, his oratory on
this account sometimes seemed to lack
spontaneity. Amonsf recent parlia
mentary speakers in England Joseph
Co wen had the same fault.
The true orator brood over his sul
ject until he has thought his way
through it and completed- mastered it.
He will not think on his feet, nor make
any effort to remember passages or
sentences, but will speak out of ths
fullness of mind and heart. Youth's
Companion.
Julia Ward Howe began the study
of ancient Greek in her old nge, but
probably with no greater interest than
that with which Queen Victoria took up
i Hindustani at seventy. That was three
years ago. and her majesty has added
staff of Hindoo servants to her house
hold, to whom she gives orders in Ilin
, dnstani, and whenever a rajah from
her far eastern dominions visits her pal
ace she converses with him in his na-
i tire tongue. !
Congressman McCleary, of Minne
sota, is the schoolmaster of the house.
He was for many years a professor of
political science in the Minnesota state
normal school, and has written a num
ber of school books that are wide
ly used His election to congress was
totals unexpected. As state institute
conductor, he had occasion to travel
all over the state twice a 3-ear, and to
this fact and to the acquaintance w hich
it gave him he owes his seat in con
gress, lie was one of the few men in
the house who were elected contrary to
their own swishes.
THE FRENCH
LABORER.
Beprcs
Some Results of the .i;rlcu!tur:il
sion in France.
The material condition of the
day
HUMOROUS.
to
Rocksly "Going
wnn your wile tins summer?
wealth "Yes, if she'll let me.
Herald.
He (driving with a vounrr ladv) "I
the seaside
X. Y.
laborer is not so good as it was fifteen 1 never try to do more than one thing at
It is a Saying of Confidence Men That "A New 'Sucker is Born Evert
Minute." Chicago Herald.
SUGAR KING
Mr. Ilavemeyer
TESTIFIES.
Senate Corn-
Before the
mlttee.
Washington, June 14. U. O. Ilave
meyer, president of the American
sugar refinery, appeared Tuesday be
fore Senator Gray's investigating com
mittee. He denied the statements
upon which the investigation is based,
both as to contributions to the cam
paign funds and the demands of the
trust that it should have protection in
the tariff bill for past favors. He said
that he had talked with several sen
ators in the interest of the proper pro
tection of the refining interests. He
admitted that he had advocated the
ad valorem system, but even with the
concession made in this direction he
declared the bill far from satisfactory.
Mr. Ilavemeyer denied all knowledge
of speculation in sugar stocks by
United States senators.
THE EIGHT-HOUR DAY.
KILLED TWO MEN.
Horrible Double Murder by an Italian at
Coal City, 1IL
Morris, 111., June ltt. Thursday
night three Italians who had been
drinking hard got into a fight at Coal
City. Guns were drawn and two of the
men were killed. One was shot through
the heart, and the other in the fore
head, both dying instantly. The mur
derer was jailed. It is impossible to
.get the names of the principals.
Lieficlt Will Exceed S74.000.000.
Washington, June 16. As the end of
the fiscal year is only fifteen days dis
tant treasury offici als are able to give
a fairly accurate estimate of the net
results of the treasury's operations for
the year. Up to this time the receipts
aggregate 8282,204,721 and the disburse
ments 5356,197,337, leaving a deficit for
the eleven and a half months of S73,
W2.C16. It is thought by the treasury
officials that the total deficit for the
year will not be materially greater
than it is now and that 74.(500,00 will
probably more than cover it.
Declared Unconstitutional by the Nebraska
Supreme Court.
Lincoln, Neb., June 12. The su
preme court decision declaring the
eight-hour a day labor law unconstitu
tional in effect is as follows:
"Sections 1 and 3 of chapter 54 of the session
laws of 181 having provided. In effect, that for
nil classes of mechanics, servants and laborers,
excepting those engaged in farm or domestic
labor, a day's work Hhould not exceed eight
hours. Held, that these provisions are uncon
stltutlonal; first, because the discrimination
against farm anil domestic laborers Is special
legislation: second, because by the act in ques
tion tho constitutional right of parties to con
tract with reference to compensation for serv
ices is denied."
who lead the republicans got what
they wanted for certain special inter
ests, and got it through Gorman and
his band. Then they were willing to
negotiate for a roll call. All this four
months of obstruction, in committee
and on the floor, has not been to
save the McKinley law. but to capture
as much swag as possible for favorite
trusts.
The commercial wellare of the coun
try has been sold out through an cn
tire spring season to get concessions
for a few establishments. And it must
not be forgotten that the industries
cotton, for example which have won
the most of this plunder employ either
very little labor or pay very low wages.
Obstruction has been republican
from first to last. Tho Coxeyizing
democrats have been republicans in
the tariff deal. There has been no re
semblance between them and the dem
ocratic majority. There has been no
sympathy or cooperation between
them and the democratic majority.
Their gains have been obtained by
junction with the republicans and in
combat with a democratic force which
the people had not made large enough.
If the western states had been repre
sented by democrats, a genuine re
form bill would have been passed be
fore March. St. Louis Republic.
BEFORE A HIGHER BAR.
Lord Chief Justice Coleridge, of England,
Is Dead.
London, June 16. Lord Chief Jus
tice Coleridge is dead. He was uncon
scious for a few hours before his death,
which was painless. His son Bernard
will succeed him in the peerape. It is
announced that Baron Russell will suc
ceed Lord Coleridge as lord chief jus
tice and that Sir John Rigby will be
come a lord justice of appeals in place
of Baron Russell. Robert T. Reid, now
solicitor general, will become attorney
general, and Richard B. Haldeman, M.
P., solicitor general.
Senator Sherman's plea for a
tariff commission was the last despair
ing cry of the protective buzzard. It
would have served to prolong the rob
beries for a few years longer, but the
democrats are not to be caught by
such chaff. Commissioners for purposes
of legislation are not recognized by
the constitution, and congress has
properly determined to discharge its
duty according to law, even if it
doesn't reach public expectation in the
character of the measure it enacts.
But the pending bill is better than
nothing, and may be regarded as the
beginning of the end of protection
plundering. Kansas City Times.
Republican gall needs no medi
cine. Offering free sugar amendments
after the democrats have agreed upon
a schedule is about as near good politi
cal economy as the parents of the su
gar trust could be expected to come.
St. Louis Republic.
of the many for the benefit of the few
It is a fair warning. This is .vhat
repulicanism aims at. This is the pur
pose of protection. This is what the
party of McKinley will do if it gets the
power.
After the election of 1892 republicans
were disposed to apologize for McKin
leyism and to admit that it might have
gone a little too far. When divisions
began to appear among the democrats
in congress, the republicans took heart
and resented and resisted all proposi
tions to scale in any wajr the extreme
McKinley duties. Now that treachery
has dene its utmost in congress to dis
credit and defeat the cause of tariff
reform, the apologists of two years
ago boldly declare that the McKinley
wall is not high enough, 'and that they
mean to crown it with a fancy coping
of still bigger profits to their chosen
wards.
Protection, for four 3-ears on the de
fensive, has assumed the aggressive.
Not satisfied with the measure which
the people have twice condemned at
the polls, it invites a square is
sue between lower taxes on the one
hand, and yet higher bounties on the
or even ten years ago; one inay con
fidently affirm that they earn three
pounds less than they did. and a farm
servant of twenty years two pounds
less. Still, rent is the same, the taxes,
however slight they may be. have in
creased, wood is dearer, bread is cer
tainly not cheaper: clothing alone costs
less now. The cause of this state of
things must undoubtedly be attributed
to agricultural depression which has
pervaded all Europe, and to the bad
harvests of the last ten years. How
ever, their condition is much better
than it was half a century ago in every
wav. Then men might be seen thrash
ing the corn in winter, workinjr by the
light of a lamp from 3:30 a. m. to 7 p.
m., receiving onlv sixpence a day and
their food, and during harvest they
earned only one shilling and sixpence
a day.
A farm servant of fourteen years of
age, who now earns at least four
pounds a year, then received only his
food, the farmer supplying him with
wooden shoes and a blouse; at seven
teen only would he begin to earn a
little money. As a rule the French
laborer is sober, industrious, hardwork
ing and thrifty, his chief aim being to
save a little monev or to buy land to
leave to his children. As a rule fami
lies are not numerous, and one rarely,
if ever, sees such early marriages as
are frequent among the lower classes
in England. One reaxm is that the
military' service is compulsory; every
man, unless physically disabled, is
bound to serve for three years, frort.
twenty-one to twenty-four; so tliey
nt.hpr. Tf tVl dlmnir!lta ognnnf rallir .
upon an issue like that, then treachery f cannot marry till this is over at any
and cowardice have struck deerer I rate, unu many uj uul 1111 . . -
than an3'onc has ever supposed.
Louisville Courier-Journal.
open
Truths About High Tariff.
High tariff .quarantines all
markets.
High tariff asks labor to take monop
oly on tru .
Cold facts show that high tariff has
killed more sheep than the dog tax
can pay for.
High tariffs attention is directed to
the democratic fact that no unprotect
ed industry has imported any "Huns."
There doesn t seem to be any more
genuine protection in Carnegie's armor
plate than in McKinley's tin helmet.
It may be incidentally remarked of
high tariff that it not only wants to
get there with both feet," but with
both hands as welL
Now that the senate has heroically
investigated itself and impartially
found itself not guilty of bribery the
sugar trust, high tariff and all othr
disinterested parties may take a lonjj
breath. Chicago Herald.
However, the military service is cer
tainly borne without reluctance and an
a matter of course by most Frenchmen
Contemporary Review.
Chemical Kffects of Freemlny.
It has been long known that frost
plays some part in the production, of
maple sugar, that a peculiar sweettesa
is imparted to potatoes by freezing.and
that persimmons do not lose their
astringencj- and become sweet and
delicious until after the first frost. A
still more striking instance 0 chemical
change due to freezing has Ken added
by a recent observation. Tho
canaigre roots of Mexico contain so
much tannin that they are likely to
supplant tree barks entirely for in
dustrial purposes, yet titer being
frozen, it is stated, not the slightest
trace of tannin is left. Just how tha
frost aci?s is a problem now to be solved.
Rochester Democrat.
W'e wish for more in life, rathei
than foi more of it. Jean Lgelow.
a time." The "Then let me drive, Mr.
Squeezeman." I)rookl3-n Life.
Tompkins "Did your new play
meet with a warm reception?"' Van
Cleve "Well, rather. Tho critics lit
erally roasted it." Harlem Life.
"I hear Bilker lost his job. Wonder
if he's struck anything since?" "Er
yes; all of his friends and two-thirds of
his acquaintances." Buffalo Courier.
Enamored Youth "May I hope to
find a place in your heart?" Lady-love
(fin de siecle) x'If you hurry up. There
are onl- a few choice locations left."
Tit-Bits.
A Verdant Diet. "Why, John, I
thought you said'like never eats like?'
"Well, isn't that right?" "No: for I
see your are eating greens.'" Detroit
Free Press.
"No- that your son has finished at
college will he teach?" Mr. Hayloft
"He -ias going to, but he can't find
nine young men round here who care
to learn foot ball or tennis." Chicago
Tribune.
"I think Mrs. Crankford must be
getting on beautifully with her lessons
at cooking school." Mrs. Fling "Did
her husband mention it?" "No, but
he's taking all his meals down town
now." Inter-Ocean.
Willie "Grandma must be dread
fully, dreadfully wicked, isn't she?"
Mamma "Why, what do you mean?
Of course she isn't:" Willie "Well
she told me her own self that the gooa
die young." Inter-Ocean.
Gump "I wish a fellow could bor
row money as easily as he can borrow
trouble." Hump "If you could make
money as easily as you can make
trouble, you wouldn't need to borrow
any." Boston Transcript.
He "Was your father artery when
you mentioned my name to him?" She
"In a perfect rage." He "Then I
suppose he will never give his con
sent?" She "Yes, he will; it was be
cause you had not asked sooner."
Inter-Ocean.
Inquiring Son "Papa. what is
reason?" Fond Tarcnt "Reason, my
bov, is that which enables a man to de
tcrraine what is right." Inquiring Son
"And what is instinct?" Fond Par
ent "Instinct is that which tells a
a woman she is right whether she is or
not." Tit-Bits.
Mr. Gibbs "Jimpson didn't come
down to the ofhee to-day: sent word
that he wasn't able to speak a word."
Mrs. Gibbs "Mercy! What is the mat
ter with him?" Mr. Gibbs "It's cither
, , , : c :
en attacK 01 paralysis, or ins wne 13
home and there's no chance for him to
got in a word." Inter-Ocaa.
v.
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