J
i
Peculiar
Many peculiar points mako Hood's w-w
saparlll.i superior to nil other medicines.
Peculiar In combination, proportion,
and preparation of Ingredients,
Hood's .s.irsaparllla iosscsses
lltn full nnrtllvn vrtliin tt tlm r m. r
beat known romodlo
of
tlio vegetable king-
om.
Peculiar In Its
strength
nd's Bar-
and economy
V
saparllla
tho oulyincdl-
clno of
Inch can truly
bo
"Miolltnidicd Doses
Ono
Poll.!,." Medicines lu
larger
t nu1 aittnllnr Iwiftlita
AJrrequIro larger doses, nnd do not
produco ns good results ns Hood's.
Peculiar In Its medicinal merits.
Hood's Sarsaparllla accomplishes cures hith
erto unknown, and lias won for Itself
tho tltloof "Tho greatest MooilOt
purifier over dlscovcod." Cvw
IVcullar In Its "good na'w S' HSTX1
Jiomc," thcro Is now ' niioro
of Hood's I i -trllhi f ftmi In
Lowell, wln.ro RjJlt li made,
than of nllr , Vctlicr blood
purifiers. .7Sl'ccullar In Its
plicnomo. AVinl record of sales
nbroad. V'iio other preparation
Uas vL.?Vj.ovcr nttntncil bucIi ponu-
riarlty In fo short n time,.
.. I wifnliiml Ita tinfilltirllV
VSL"Hd coniidcnco nmong nil classoi
of people bo steadfastly.
Do not bo Induced to buy other preparations,
but bo euro to get tho rccullar Medicine,
Hood's Sarsaparilla
BoMtijrnllilriiKKlst!. Malxforff3. Prepared ontr
r 0. 1. 1I00I) A CO., ApothocnrlM, I.onoll, Mm
IOO Dosos Ono Dollar
' tlllll itttllUVU JIO ifwi'iiiiinirf
PomeroyW
COMPANY
LDEALERS INj:
Coal and Wood.
Good! supply ot
High Grade Soft,
anq Hard Coal al
ways on hand.
1201 O St.
J. R.- LEMIST,
Agent.
GORSRTS
Woitli up tO?2.CX).
Manufacturers Samples choice this week
50 cents.
ico dozen Lndics Alexandre Kid Gloves
five hook, embroidered backs at $1. Ileal
value $1.75.
I. FRIEND & SON,
913 nmToi50 Street
Drayage and loving.
OLIVER MAGGA1U)
Desires to Inform the public that Ills equip,
merit for moving I Iouseliold Goods, 1'ianos
Safes, Msirchntulisc, Heavy Mnchlnery.
etc., Is the best in the cltv. Special men
nnd wagons nre kest for the removal of
Pianos and Household Goods,
Which arc always handled by competnnt
nnd experienced help, nnd the latest appli
ances used for handling Snfes nml other
heavy goods. Call, address or telephone
OLIVER MAGGARD,
Telephone 1 1 1 Ollicc 917 O St.
AHUA8ION OF THE TEETH.
Tho nbovo cut shows the teeth of a man 45
years of ago. from l)r Hell lu 1831. Wo meet
nlth this affection In tin- teeth In various forms
nd degrees. Tho ends ot tho crowns seem
verj soft, having a low decree of vitalltv and
wesrdown showing adurk jillow-l' flipped
pot In tho center. Many uru so foolih is to
think that molar teeth are ot little ace-tint,
ami lit them go by default; after which ull
tho force of tho muscles are extended to tho
front teeth, wearing thorn down rapidly.
Tho best, and ordy remedy, Is to cover and
buildup tho ends with gold and platinum,
which wears llko steel and saves them many
eura. Wo make a specialty of lino gold work
on building them up, contour linings, etc.
A.
iniP
oorozy
ratejj
(!uts A and 11 are front John Tonics, of Eng
land. A Ttrolnrlcors with notches In tho ends.
li tihows thopegehupid teeth with yellowish
pits in the ends
For such teeth wo have two remedies : First
To llll 1 In pits lu tho ends with gold. Bee
mid Extract them and replace Hiein with
urtlllclal tceih. hut the hones nlunrli away
rapidly so that they wllluced resetting fro
iiuentlj'.
Wo mako tho llnett artificial teeth lu tho
northwest
Wo uso Jmtles' and Whlto'g patent teeth,
with long, heavy plus, mounted 1111 Btroug
elastic plates. Thoso who patronize us will
not ho troubled with broken teeth and cracked
plates, canker sure mouths, etc.
Tolooso tho front teeth, Is hi lonso half
tho power of speech, aud moru than half tho
beauty.
LINCOLN ON HIS OWN POLICY. I
Uoir He I'.tplnlnoil It In III Own Ti
liiiltvhln Hljle.
That Important iivrnt In tho llfo of tlm
president tho (iiinticlpatimi proclamation
was long conMdored. It was tho president'
wish to protnoto nllko tho linppltie of whho
and bluok. mill bo hesitated Iwforo tho stu
pondotii dcerw of liumodinto oiunnelpathm.
Ho wlshul tho change to Iw gradual. To tii
Ills own words: "I wish It to come in gently
as tho dows of hoiivcn, not rending or wiwli
Ing anything." Tho proplo wore wotoliltij:
Ids net Ion with Intense solicitude, nml every
moans was mod to liilluciiou lilni, alike by
those who favored nml those who opposed
(ininneljmtlon. NimiWivd with tho fonnor
was Horace- Urcvloy, whoso letter, published
under Ills own tmino In Tho Now York Trill
unc, nml urging onmiielintlon, H noil ro
mcinlicrcd by our older renders. In tho
president's reply, extracts from which nro
hero given, bo uvollod himself of tho oppor
tunity to sot lilmelf light Ix-foro tho jiooplo,
and added et nuotlier proof of hii ftliiglo-
iicsh or purpose Tho letter wns dated vug.
sa, iRoa
"Ah to the jiolley 'I Room to lw pursuing,'
us you wiy, I hu o not meant lo lenvo any
ouo In doubt. I would mvo the Union. I
would save It in tho shortest way under tho
constitution.
"My imrnmount object Is to mvo tho
Union, nml not ollher to suvo or destroy
slavery.
"If I could shvo tho Union without freeing
any slaves, I would do It. And If I could
snvo it by freeing nil tho slaves, I would do it.
And If 1 could biivo it by freeing somo nnd
leaving others nlono, 1 would nlo do that.
"What I do nliout slnvory nml tho colored
race, 1 do liccuuvj I liellevo it helps to mvo
tho Union; nml what I forloiir, I forliear bo
cnuso I do not bollovo it wouM help to sve
tho Union.
"I shall do less whenever I liellovo what I
am doing hurts tho cause, and Bhnll do inoro
whonover I ucllovo iloiu, inoro will neip mo
cnuso.
"I shall try to correct errors when shown
to bo error, and I shall adopt now vlows no
fast ns thoy upicur to Iks truo vlows.
"I hnvo hero kbited my purpose, according
to my vlow of ofllcinl duty, and I Intended
no inodifleatloii of my oft oxprwbed iorponal
wish that all men everywhere could lw froo."
Tlio final proolamntion was Issued Jan. 1,
ISO. As tho pner wni brought to Mr.
Lincoln by tho secretary of btato to lw signed,
hoBuId: "Mr. Beward, if my naino overgcts
Into history it will bo for this act, nnd my
wholo soul is 111 it,"
ODE TO LINCOLN.
A head, tio v Bolcr I A heart, how spacious I
A manner equal ulth lilli or low;
Rough, but gentle, uncouth, but gracious.
And still Inclining to lips of woo.
Patient when wuldrst, calm when sternest,
Orluved when rigid for Jiiitlco's sako;
Given to Jest, yet over lu earnest
If aught of right or trutli wero at stako.
Slmplo of heart, yet shrewd therewith, ,
Row to resolve, mil nrm to'iioin;
Still with parnhlo and with myth,
Learning truth llko them of old,
Aptest humor and quaintest plthl
Z?JSi
(Still wo sinllo o'er tlio tales 110 ioiu.j
Yet who so mlglit plereo tho gulso
Of mirth lu tlio man wo mourn,
Would mark, and with grieved surprleo,
All tho great soul had liorne,
In tho pit -ins lines, nnd tho kind, bad eyes,
80 dreadfully wearied nnd worn.
llE.Niir Howaiid BnowNCLU
Ono of Lincoln's Stories.
When Grant waa fighting his wny south
ward, at tho Wilderness nml other bloody
battles, tells Mr. .1. II. Llttlollold, an old
friend of Lincoln's, somelwdy wns always
going to tlio president nnd nuking him why
bo did not get n better geWnl; ono Hint
would givo entire satisfaction north. Mr.
Lincoln told tho dbfeatibliod stuy-nt-homea
thisnuecdoto:
"Thero was a church up on tho Hudson
river that had a. swell preacher. Tho uiidl
onco did not like him; ho dressed too fine,
wns too ixx'tfcnl lu hit ideas nml too dedno-
tlvo in his methods of reasoning, Tho mem
bers wonted n pastor not qulto so fashion
ablo, and inoro practical and every day llko
In his hcrmous, Tlio swell pastor wns dis
charged and tlio practical preacher installed.
Ho did not suit them. Ho was too in
ductivo in his reasoning nnd too prosalo In
his delivery, and far too common nnd plalu
In his uttiiv. Tliey couldn't stand him, bo ho
hail to go. Then tho congregation jietitloncd
for n pastor that could combine nil tho qual
ities of Iwtli their provlousiulnisters, without
bclug us ultra us either, and who could strike
n happy medium lietwot'ii tho Imluctivo nnd
dcductlvo methods, mid not !o too poetical
nor too prosy. After much advertising thoy
got n man who had graduated nt Ynlo nnd
Harvard, no ascended tho pulpit, which
was high, nml as ho was bhort in stature, his
iiend just showed Itself to tho audience. Ho
yelled to them in u squeaky, cracked voice,
that ho had como to preach to them, nnd ho
related it ugnln nnd again."
Thoso who wcro listening to tho president
saw tho jwint of his btory nnd retired. Thoy
novcr asked him to remove Gen. Grunt
again.
l'lrst l'nlntml Llkeum of Lincoln.
Tlio picture of Mr. Lincoln horo presented,
Is from an original painting by Thomas
Hicks ut tho beginning of tho campaign.
This picture, which was mndo for a Now
York publishing house, and lithographed nt
tho time, is, iwrhnps, less familiar to tho
world ut large thun any other likeness. It
has, howovcr, tho merit of having plcasod
Mr. Lincoln himself, who, when tlio jwrtralt
was finished, bald to Mr. Hicks:
"It will glvo tho jxioplo of tho east n cor
rect idea of how I look at homo, nnd, in fact,
liow I look In my olllco. I think tho pict
ure bns a 6omowbat plcasauter expression
than I usually have, hut thut, perhaps, is not
1111 objection."
1- -
FI.OU ', Mi', 'H llli u ,' 1'OIUHAIT.
Thin ''oitu ,1 is aUu of Interest beenuso it
Is tho th-t painted likemB over mado of
Llneo'' , 1 Itli. uU t- had hcou luuuy tlruo
Js
THE YCUNQ PEOPLC.
Young ilinViaun Sturn ArruiiiiilUlii'il 'Ihsr
III. .Mnltipr 'IIioiikIiI.
.too .IclVorsoti, tho actor, som tlmo ago
bought a lingo givit nnd heat It to bis lltll)
4-vwir-old son Willie, nt their ivoldeiirn in
HolK.keii. N. J. Tho next day tholittU fob
low put harness on tho goat and Ugnii driv
ing him iiroiiud tlm RrvonhoiiMi. Suddenly
tho gout turned ami tlnvw Willie to the
ground. Tho lxiy was so MirprlMnl to find
hlin'lf ti'iii tol in that way that lie could not
(.peak or riko for nevoral iniuuti. When, nt
Inst, ho did get lip.tbo goat had left for purls
unknown. Willie looked nitmml for a inln
u (o nml then wild: "Jiv, I could kill dnt
goshldy. blnsety thing forn goat."
His mother, who hud Uvii nil eyo wlttics
tonllthatluul been golnRon, Mild: "Willie,
l'mhurprlMtl, on limit not talk that way;
It h not nice."
"Oh, dat's nothing, mamma' ivplled Wil
lie, enroloMly; "I knows worsor tings dnti
dnt to hay if 1 could only tlnk of dein."
Now York livening Hun.
(Iniio Out t Walk.
Harold is getting old enough to nstoiiNli
his pnronts iKvaslonnlly with mi orlgluil it
mark Tin other owning his mother said
something to his father, who was rending.
He didn't hoar it, Klio ixHaled it, but tho
hivid of tho family was tK intent' on his
reading to notlco Hint ho was lieliuj
addresMHl, Harold had watcheil oeratious,
nnd nftcr bis mother had spoken tii" mh-oiiiI
time, obscrvel: "Miiminii, 1 think you'll
hnvo to Vuso papa. I gtlem his ears bus
gono out to walk around tlio block for n for
inlnutcrt." Chicago Tribune.
A Had Muto f Tlilni;..
Tliero lives in Ixiniilnstcr, on Central
btrect, n rather nervous l-yenr-old girl, wh
could Dover sleep utiles the room was dimly
lightod. Ono night recently tho lamp bo
cainoextiuguiahet nnd khocalleil loudly for
her mother, who asked what was tho mutter.
Hlio Mild between sobs: "Tho light is out,
nnd 1 can't no whether my oyes nro ojien or
not." Huston Qlobo.
Viewed rrnm tlm 1'nrlli.
A littlo girl, waking up In season to co tho
brilliant morning star shining in nt tlio win
dow, d wailing nil other stunt and miggctttiug
a heavenly light different from uuy tdio had
been before, cxclalmod:
"Oh, mammal Clod's Ugh tod his lampl''
rtoston Transcript,
MUMt i:iiin.trlnnUm,
Littlo .Tohn witnessed a military drill. Ono
of tho ollleers rodo a horsu wlileh was very
unruly, nnd hi somo of his nntlcs nearly
throw his rider; when-upon John exclaimed
oxclteillyi "Mamma, imimmh, Mr. I'lswl's
hon.0 don't lit hlinl" Youth's Companion.
Thoy MmU w !MItri.
A sninll girl of .1 years smbflnly burst out
crying nt tho dinner table,
"Why, Ethel," said her mother, "what is
tho matter V
"Oh!" whined Ethel, "my teeth stepped on
my tonguo." lloston Journal.
Anatomically Dr.rrlhrd.
Ono littlo girl describing nnnther's party
costume had nrrlved as far as her shoes wrten
bhosald: "And don't you liellovo, mamma,
her shoes wcro so tight I could boo nil th'i
knuckles on her toes." Youth's Companion,
An lnti're.thiK l,ucrj.
Our littlo Iwy, (l yours old, was sent to
Bchool last week for tho first time, and oil hi
return homo asked his pupa:
"Who taught tho lint mini Ills letters"
lloston Qlolw.
"Wanted It ITndrrs.od.
I'olly wunUtl an egg when U years old.
"I'leaso tmdretu tho egg, Tom, nnd glvo it to
m","was thowaysho asked for it. Boston
Journal,
Horry.
Husband (groaning) Tho rheumatism in
my leg Is coining on again.
WIfo (with sympathy) Oh, I am so sorry,
John. I wanted to do some shopping to-day,
nnd that is a suro sign of rain. Tho Epoch,
With but n Hlnglo Thought.
"I havo to thank you for a pleasant oven
Ing, Miss Hllderbnck, said young 1'eckln
paugh, at 11:30 o'clock, as ho roso to go, "I
havo scarcely felt ns if I wcro an acquaint
ance until this evening, but now it almost
seems as if I had known you for years."
"I was about to mako tho sumo remark,"
murmured tho young lady, with her eyes on
tho clock. "It docs, Indeed, boom a long
time." Chicago Tribune.
A ytoicirtels I'llle.
Omaha Mnii Eastern journalism must lo
improving. I saw by tho paper tho other
day that a reporter on a Now York news
paper had lteen discharged for lying.
Now York Man I beard about that.
"Ho'll novcr lw 11 reporter on that paper
ugnln, I biipjioso."
"No, Indeed; bo's been given a high posi
tion in tho circulation department." Omaha
"World.
There's .Much In 11 Word.
Clerk (who U-longs to a Khakesiearean
lyceuiu mid whoso dramntie la-iit has rather
tho better of him reaches tlio olllco at 10a. m.
Greeting to his omplojcr) Good morrow,
bir.
Employer (something of a business! man)
It Is nearly. Indeed. Hereafter, sir, I would
llko to have jou get iimtmd in llmotohld
1110 good iiiuruiiii;. Judge.
t'lillln Ainonltle.,
liiislnosB Man (with bisfsit 011 his desk, to
Himll npplleniitt Hoy, ft -i you know
enough when oii enter u t Vinuin's olllco
10 tukti our luit oll'f
Hoy (lakiu ; H bis lint) Vc , A. Whero
blmll I hung 11, 0,1 your lit(
Tho boy u still luuj,iug for 11 job. Now
York Hun.
Tho Holing 1'ap.aliiit.
"I'll tuueh you to piny pit-b tmd to.'.1'
bhoutud 1111 ei ntwl futbur. "I'll Hog you for
nu hour, I ill.'
"I'litber." instantly replied the inonrrlgiblo,
as ho unlnnciKi a punny n hU thumb mid
(lnger, "I'll tin you to mako it two hours 01
nothing " l..i!n lllobo.
Wlifll
Hrf Vrnpo.nl.
Bho gor t took Ills Milv hand.
And Vf nilcrtv she (ilneetl
llerarm, wlOuiuln ivpilmaud,
AUnil hU willing wal.t,
BhoihvM hlnicloso) n ivieront klM
Un his brow sho pii'wmM,
lle)le.i',. and 11 new found bllM
fiel nil her fears ot iwt.
Then in i wild, lnip:i4oned way,
mrrf
ller lnoror him nliololil,
And Ix'Kired of him that Im.would say
She'd mil lieen ovrr btild.
Without Mm nit her life, alio said,
Would lio n desert dnvirs
If he wld "No," bho'd never wed
At least till nexw l'ap Year,
lllnvliiiijf. lio hunnl her biwely through,
AiM ihen hoeiKied' "Oh, In!
Thl. U n) awful sudden, Huo:
You'll Imvo to ask iny ma'"
Journal of IMucntlnn.
A "I'olntor."
Mr. HlghhoUow Ah, by tho way, Miss
lUttenhouso. wberu do tho Dolwotm liVof
bomenhero facing thl1! park, I think.
Miss KlttcnhotiKo 1 don't know tholr iiuiii
tier, but tliero goes their cat nowl If you
follow It quickly, I'm sum it will lend you di
rectly to tho holm Texas Hitting.
A Satisfactory KxplHimtlon.
Ordlnaiily ono would not cxioot to And
among tho mii.ty reoorils nnd pniorson lllo
In tho war department anything suggesting
humor or pleasantry. Hut this Is Just whnt
occurred to 1110 tho other day when I was
looking over hoiiio iwipers in tlio quartermas
ter general's dopartmont. Your nnders may
not know nt least IIioho not famlllnr with
military matiera that it frequently hnpHiiH
tbnt, by leason of death, doseitlon and ills
charge, the number of men lu a troop is less
than tho number of horses on baud. A troop
captain not long ago had occasion to send a
requisition for oidunnco stores, including,
nmong other things, slxty-llvo "uoso bags."
After tho usual long Interval this requisi
tion wns duly returned, with tho Indorse
ment: "Hespectfiilly returned to dipt.
, th Cavalry. Tho returns of his troop
show that ho has only llfty.four men, nnd ex
planation is desired ns to why lio required
.dxty-llvo noso bags."
Tho captain's explanation was as follows;
"Uesjiectfiilly returned, Tho noso Ixigs nro
required for my horses, ami not for tho
men." Now York Tribune.
A l'rlrnilly l'olnlrr.
Occasionally you see young men on tho
htrnots who nro very elegant of nttlro and
who wear whitogiiitcr tom ovor their auklon.
Onooftlieso youths was standing on Chnixil
stns't tho other duy, with his gaitor tops look
ing llko 11 jMilr of culls nt tho ground end o!
his iKiutaloons, wbou n rather countriflcd
young man, evidently a farmer, stopiied up
to hl'ii nml said: "Hay, young mnii, It's none
of 111 v business, but iierluqis you would llko
to know that them 'oro whlto stockings of
yourn hnvo drnpiuil down over your shoos."
Exchange.
Surcil Ironi Death.
Athnidaut at Blldo I'm very sorry, sir;
but tho last toboggan was engaged for tho
evening nu hour ugo.
Pupa (who has allowed tho girls to drag
him out, nnd has been watching tlio sport for
tlio llrst time) .My friend, liero nro my
watch and pocketbook. Tako them with the
highest expression of my wteuui, and If you '
over need 11 trlenil call on mo. Tid-Ults.
I'rrnoli a. Npoknu In Clilengo,
Another dialogue overheard nt tho tboutro
botweeu acta:
Young Miiy (to her young man) Did you
attend tho bo' I
Young Man You mean tho hop.
Young Lady I guu68 I know what I mean.
Ho' is French for hop, just tho samo as gulo'
is French for galop. How long huvo you
been in bocloty, anyhow 1 Chicago Mull.
No Holidays In Theirs.
"Doctor, you ought to tako a vacation."
"My dear follow, I tried that onco and it
proved most disastrous. It was at least six
weeks after I camo back lioforo my pa
tients got into tho wny of being sick again.
I tell you it doesn't pay for a inun to let his
business go nt loono ends." UurliugUu Froo
Press.
All tlio Direction..
A bigu on tlio htntiou lioubo at Dig Sandy,
Wy. T., rends as follows:
'JO miles from wood.
20 miles from water.
40 miles from tdicol.
Ood blebs our homo.
Girl wanted apply within. Judgo.
I'retty Old.
"Queen Victoria iiuitt bo nearly U.000 years
old," remarked littlo Johnny McSwilllgen.
"Whero do you get that idea f asked his
inauima.
"Why, I often a) 'Victoria, H. 0.,'
tlio jwpers." Pittsburg Chroniela
in
Had Seen the. Atilmnl. Iltifortt,
Mrs. Clotham ui her niihv, iiting from
Cbleago) -I am going to v ,1 lapidary,
Clum; would on hko to go nlniigf
Olara I think not, this morning, uuuty; I
hnvo u alight headache, and, Uvdih-s, I can
Very littlo for tho uieuuuvrKv, - '! iio Upoch.
iiffllirW
fiMr7sS6 III
BTOniRS ADOUT MEN.
I T'Oiiieinnr Mimntllii'K Intiirn.tltifr Talk
wllli 11 Hear nnd II11111I1 .Mini,
E.(1oeiiior lleiihih MnKOllIu, of ICcli-
ifky, K'it In the tiiilu oiMiikiy at lYaukfmt
In Ho to Uixlnxlon. I lo wit, down by thoNldo
ir a very hnmlmiino, Intelllgetil looking
yo'iiiK 111,111. Tho governor, who was a great
talker, nl otieii begun tnchut. The young mini
listened well, uppaiintlly, uoihlliig his head
from Unto to time, ns If ho ngnvd wllh tho
govermir'N views, but it miiiiumI that ho
couldn't Hud room to put In 11 word, This
continued until lhc lynched iHixlugtoii,
when ivt'oiillnl htitid oliakouiid all exehatign
of eanls took pbuv. HuliMipietilly, lu tho
eoi'llilornf the I'IhciiIx hole), tho governor
wns tlllug n (nil ly or friends nliout. thniiiecU
lug, saying the joting man was ono of tho
HUM. iiKin-olilo felloWM ho ever encountered,
"lVihiiiHKomoof you know him," sold bo,
"ho bus one brown and one gray eyo. Hut
flop, I hnvo his curd!"
"Why, governor," said ono of tho pnrly,
"that ww Hob King; lie's deaf and dumb.
Everybody knows html" I'hllndelpliln
TII1K1I,
Olitu't Know Ho Was I'le.ldenl.
When (Minrlea I'lm'krr was ut Portland on
his bplko driving tour over tho California and
Oregon, mi Incident occurred which Is lllus
tratlvoof tho bewildering liuigultlido of tho
rnllnity liitt'iTMUnf tliatgeiilleiiuiii. lio re
ceived a cull at tho Esmond house from tho
general manager of tboOivgouhiu rnilwny, n
littlo mil row gauge formerly under tho con
ttolof 11 Hootch company. Mr. Crocker re
garded tho Islt ns purely compllmeulary,
but when tho narrow gauge mnuagor iH'gan
to talk nbout tlm prospects of his Hue, tho
ticca at it pairs at, eeriniii points, ami gnvo
tho magtitto tlinnsRuraneothat It was a fairly
prosiieious concern, Mr. C'lH-ker's mind ls
eiunn cloudy. Ho clearly did not know whnt
the man was driving nt. Htill tlm nillcliil
went on until ho wns interrupted by a friend
who hapHiicd to bo present, mid who said.
"Mr. Crocker doesn't uuderstnml wiiut ull
tills is nlxiuU"
"Oh, I guess ho docs," mild tho general
manager, with it conlldeut air. "I guess ho
knows that ho Is president of this railroad."
"Dut I'm If ho did," said Mr. Crocker,
"until you said 10 this moment."
Tlio incident eivateil a rlpplo of merriment
nmong the rnllronii men who Impelled lo bo
proent, ami son 10 of tlm Portland miignntcH
who beard tho story thought a great deal less
of their railroad Interests when they iV
fleeted on tho fact that hero wai a man who
was president of a ralhoad mid didn't know
It, Likovio.v (Oro 1 Examiner.
"IIih Omit line. Not l.uiicli,"
A leanusl coiiiimiI lu Mr. Jnstlco Day's
court, In tho queen's IkmicIi, applied to his
lordship to nduu"ii 11 ensn until nftcr tho
''luncheon tf mo' of tho court, ns the plaintiff
had telegraphed that ho had missed his train.
Mr Justlco Dmv You should ask that tho
caso bo iorponod until after "tho adjourn
ment,'' foi "tlio court" does not lunch; that
Is not 1111 epoch in tho llfo of "tho court,"
iLaughtcr ) 1 do nut scnk of what individ
uals do, but "tho court" does not lunch.
l.oiidoit Telegraph.
Artist Whistler nml Oscar Wlldc.
A lloston nrtlst tells this story of Whlstlor
and Oscar Wilde, who has tho reputation of
borrow Ing WhUtler'a bright sixioelios. 1 lav
ing hoard tho artist say uu unusually good
thing Oscar oxclaimod deploriugly; "I wish
I could hnvo said that." "Oh," replied
Whistler derisively, "but you know you will
any It." lloston Herald.
Ilinird on tho Komi.
Proprietor Kansas Hotel Have tho waiter
gentlemen had their dinner yctt
Head Waiter Yes, ball.
"Has the professor of cooking saved out all
bo wants for his fumily and friends!"
"Yes, bah."
"Did tho upstairs ladles and tho btablo gen
tlemen havo ull tlwy wanted P
"Yos, bah."
"Is tliero anything leftP
"A little, bull."
"Well, cull in tho Iwardcrs." Omaha
World.
Wanted Uu UlKht.
Thoy wcro talking about tho btato if tho
thermometer, und by tho time nil had got
through it wns found that tho record ranged
from 'J degs. to 7 degs. below. Fiiuillj nu
old colored man, who sat next tothostovo,
wns apcalod to, and ho said:
"Gcin'len, I knowed dls yero coldness
would como upon do kyur dis mawiiiii', nn'
so T mndo up my mind I'd bo rilit ulxnit it.
My tlternionieter bhowed jit exactly II degs.
bolow half an hour ago, an' I took it down
oft do nail an' put it in my ixckot to bring
along fur proof. Hho's ere."
And bo Uxik It from his overcoat pocket,
unrolled It from a haudkorchiii, mid tuusod
It over.
"Why, it shows SIS dogs, abovot" exclaimed I
tho man who received it, whllo everybody I
Utidci-iitood that it had warmed up, and lie- I
gnu to lamdi-
"Jin! hiHMiwsciif aai, dut M'ttiw mo
wld nny mo' foolin' around I lteekou do
emlluiu bus dropiml olV in do snow nu' she's
Kit out to paint do town red!" Detroit Trce
1'lVbS.
Natural.
Fanny You know my huslxnul Is very
rich, aud yet I act not happy with him. HU
way of eating Is m disagreeable, showing
that his early education uiut havo Utm neg
levied. 1 wtsh I could improvo his tablo
maimers.
l.iuni Ills stable maimers you mean, '
dear. 1
1 Ami now tluy do not kjk1 as thoy jiass
1 by. rsow York lirajmte.
(iKltlm; n Vordlet.
"Ah, guntWiu a," Bald tho foreman of tho
Jury, as lie wlxd tho copious tears from hit
eyes, "tliat win an uffocUng summing up of
tho dofomlimtV poiitistl. llxcuso this eino
tiou, but Is the venbet guilty or not gtilltyP
And oftcli Juror, hi voloo thick with emo
tion, inurmui . "Uuilty." Kow York Sun.
.1. II. liAWKLNH,
ARCHITECT AHD SUPERINTENDENT,
llnllilliigs veinpleteil or In Joourxo of erection
from April I, IhMi:
Ihislneks him k. (ir.oiilgoiiiery, tlllintulN.
do do I, W llllflligsley, lllhliearN
ItcMatiraiit (Odells) I V. .Mimtgnmery, N near
llth,
Iteslilelice, .1 .1 billion, ,1 and I'.'lh,
do .1 Dilnifnilanil, yandlllh,
do John .eliiuug, II nml tllh,
lo AIIh'iI Wiitkliis, ll bet 1Mb and 10th
ihl Wm M Noiiiiid. Klxl 1Mb and 10th,
do K ll(lulhlle,tmhmiilN.
do .1 I! lltcd, M li, Khet lillh and 17th
do l.fl M IIiiIiIhIii, (I Ip.t Ihlhaml IHIIi,
Hniillnrliim Imlldliig at Mllrnnl. Ned,
I'll rt llaptlst rhtiivli, I llh nnd K slncls,
ortuiiry ehndul and iTecWIngMoiiili at WyultA
efineli'iy,
Olllco HiMiiiii' IKI nmini
RIoI-imi'cIh BlooU.
DR. B. B. Powers,
DENTIST,
GoldFillings A Specialty
Gold, Silver and I'orstchiln Crowns Insert
ed cm toots of teeth. Sets Inserted without
a plate. Alt operation llrstxlitss 11 ml war
ranted.
tJi.t O Sticet over Elliott's.
15. 0. KOSTKA,
North Side Pharmacy,
I230 O ST.
Albums 25 per cent off.
1 ... n
TRAVEL VIA THE
BURLINGTON ROUTE.
It Istlinonlv llun ruiiiilnir dlrecllv through
Deliver and Halt Ijilto city, onrouto to Han
KranelHco and other California points, and U
known as tlio "8'eulo I.liio" to tho I'aclllo
const. Tlio llurlliiKlon llotito runs over II
own track every day In tho your, ('omplcto
trains of Pullman I'alaco Curs ami ICIeKimt
Day Couches between
Denver and Chicago.
Denver and Kan. City,
Denver nnd Omaha,
Kansas City and Peoria,
Kansas City and Chicago,
Lincoln and Chicago,
Lincoln and St. Louis,
Lincoln nnd Peoria,
Lincoln and Kan. City,
Malting dlreel connections In Union Depots
for nil points North, Host, H011II1 mid West.
It Is tho I'lourer Dllilmt Cur l.lno holwoo.it
Missouri river ami Cbleairo. Meals only 7Aa.
Tho llurlliiKtnii DIiiIiik Cars were built ox
proksly for thoHcrvleo and am iiinmiKcd en
tirely In tho Interest of our patrons,
HI10KT UNHIIETWKEN
LINCOLN AND OMAHA.
Vlatbo Ashland Cut-oir, making direct con
nections with trains for Ht.I'aul, MlnneaolU
ClileiiL-ii ami all nolnts ICiistiind Northoast.
Tho dlnurams of tho I.lncolii-Clilcairo sleep
ers via this iMiiilar rout nro at City Olllco, cor.
Oiiml loth sts,, wboroburths may bo secured
at any time.
A. 0. 7.1 EM Kit,
H. nUHTIS, P. and 1'. Aut., Lincoln
(J. I'. and T. AkU Omaha.
FAST MAIL ROUTE.
2 DAILY TRAINS 2
TO
Atchison, Leavenworth, St. Joseph, Kansas
City, St. Louis and all jxiiuts South,
Kast and West.
The direct line to Ft. Scott, Parsons,
Wichita, Hutchinson and all principal
points lu Kansas.
The only road to the Great Hot Springs
of Arkansas. I'ui.i.mak Sli'.kit.us ami
Fki'.i: Ki'.cMNiNfi Ciiaik Caks an all
trains.
H. G. HANNA, R. P. R. MILLAR,
City Tkt Agent, Gen'l Agent.
Cor. Oiind utli Sts.
Fremont Elkhorn & Mo. Valley
JZULTTJJ3.OJL.lD
Trains Ieao0 .Via. in. aud W:(Yi p. in
Tin. rU.KiioiiN Vallkv Link. ,
To fno homes in Northwesteru Ncbnuka 'an
Southwestern Dakota.
To the black Hills and tho Hot Springs.
To Central Wjomlui; coal und on ttclds an
cattle ranges.
To Chicago and the Kat.
To St Paul, tho North aud Northwest.
Kor further information Inquire ot
U M. TYI.EH, Agent
115 South lOlh street, - . Lincoln
W R ntwi, J. It. HecuiNAN,
Gencrnl Jl'gv r, (loti'l Pass. Ag't
Mihsouri Valley, low a
3.A.SH0EMAKER,B.D"
' llomo)0)iitliist Physician,
Teli-nhone No, 6S5.
1 163 South nth direct, Lincol.m Nitn
